Thursday, April 25, 2013

TNA Impact Live Thread

Matches announced for this week are:

Chavo Guerrero & Hernandez vs. Austin Aries & Bobby Roode for the Tag-Team Titles
Velvey Sky vs. Mickie James for the Knockouts Title

Plus, Bully Ray calls out Hulk Hogan

120 comments:

  1. With the first selection in the draft, the Blog of Doom selects....cultstatus.

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  2. I'd gladly settle for a late-round pick or UFA invite.

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  3. I guess no one told security about these things called guns. Aces and Eights aren't bulletproof.

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  4. Who goes #2 then?

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  5. That would be me. *Holding up my new jersey*

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  6. A.J. appears mostly uninterested in that idea... can't blame him.

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  7. I'm going sixth round, no. 199.

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  8. "....do you know who we ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh??"

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  9. If you would have told me that Taryn Terrell would be more relevant in wrestling than Drew McIntire I would have laughed.

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  10. I dont know if the Observer lists "Best Ring Attire" in their awards but if they did, Taryn Terrell is the winner for 2013.

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  11. I'm Mr. Irrelevant.

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  12. Time for some new hair extensions though. Looking even trashier than usual.

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  13. THAT was a weak-ass finish to an acceptable KO match. Bleh.

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  14. She just pinned a former world champion, while Drew is dancing and jobbing on TV (When he's on TV at all.)

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  15. Those two should definitely form a tag team. As weird as it sounds, they're entertaining together.

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  16. Here's your


    trophy:http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkiblfFQeb1qgoqho.jpg

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  17. Here's my scouting report:

    Consistently writes reviews on shows that either took place before a majority of the posters were born or on stuff that was barely seen by anyone at all..... Came back a bit more polished after a brief run in 2009...Continues to make minor gramatical errors......Does not get harrassed as much as the other non-Scott Keith reviewers....A semi-regular participant in live RAW threads....Dislikes AJ more than others
    Consensus: 5th rd pick

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  18. They make sense together (at least until Zack Ryder gets canned and he shows up in TNA.)

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  19. Wow, Hemme looks particularly phenomenal tonight. Where's my foot-to-head shot?

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  20. ..you want to get a Brogue Kick?

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  21. And hopefully this detaches Rob T. from the "Bros"... TNA needs numbers now.

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  22. Tenay does not convey emotion well. He either has a 'grumpy old man face' or 'befuddled old man face.'

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  23. She definitely has that trashy hot look down, I'll give her that.

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  24. Exactly. If I got my hands on Hemme I'd just have her give me finishers all night.

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  25. Sigh... looks like Bruce's borrowing HHH's Sledgehammer of Plot there.

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  26. I think you'd be one and done.

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  27. Crash and burn, Super-Mex.

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  28. Damn, that's like the fourth or fifth harsh faceplant tonight.

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  29. Please, please, please let Los Stereotypes lose. Please?

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  30. Jesus. This is outright ridiculous.

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  31. Wow, Chavo is awful. I loved how he stood up and then ducked back down in clear view of the camera.

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  32. Chavo is quickly becoming X-Pac circa 2001.

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  33. Funny how the Mexi-types are an afterthought in all this.

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  34. Who does Chavo have compromising pictures of?

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  35. Side note: I want the Jets to pick up Teo so the internet can explode.

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  36. Dixie. And he's plugging her in 'em.

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  37. Matt Morgan. Not the man anyone wants, but the man Hulk Hogan (or Dixie Carter?) NEEDS.

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  38. Did they really call AJ Styles new submission the calf killer??

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  39. +1 for good minds thinking alike, even though we had different men in her life.

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  40. Or they're just of her massaging Just For Men into his beard.

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  41. And even though I heard it earlier, it just popped into place. Another injudicious application of the HHH Sledgehammer of Plot.


    Calfzilla (which NEEDS to be another patch on Bully's jacket), meet the Calf Killer.

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  42. So is Matt Morgan's new character supposed to be a Just Joe/Sean O'Haire pot-stirrer? Kinda weird that he's just not out there killing guys weekly.

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  43. Seriously, Matt. Get a fucking haircut.

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  44. Yet, EVERYBODY on this roster has done more to deal with A&8 than Matt Morgan. Including Joseph Park, Christy Hemme, and even Earl Hebner.

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  45. Let that man enjoy his hair plugs.

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  46. This is my nightmare. Buying tix to Slammiversary blind and get Morgan-Ray.

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  47. I'd call Hogan-Ray a bigger nightmare.

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  48. Every time I see Mickie I get a sudden craving for roast beef.

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  49. Matt Morgan = Lex Luger.

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  50. Here's a strange one. You'd think the Knockouts are beneath the notice of the Aces. BUT, Bully likes screwing with Brooke. So do we get an Aces Knockout? It makes sense and no sense at the same time...

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  51. Nah. Lex at least won the big one, twice. I can see Morgan getting a title run, but at the same time it would not stun me to see him go titleless.

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  52. Of course, but there's no way Hogan's working a match. And Morgan is literally the only wretched option. They could've gone with Park, Storm, AJ, Angle, Joe, whoever, and I'd be look forward to a decent match.

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  53. We still have five weeks. It'll take at least the rest of this year for all of us to get used to this longer-term booking.

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  54. Nah. A push like this is "pics of screwing farm animals" or a "satanic ritual with minors" worthy.

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  55. Where's "D: None of the Above" for that question?

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  56. I hope Mickie's up to the task of carrying Velvet to a respectable match.

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  57. I don't think anyone is capable of doing that, not even Ric Flair in his prime after a sex transplant.

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  58. I'll give them this, this week's crowd has been solid. Shame the show's running on mediocre-average at the moment.


    This show should've been in Corpus Christi, and two weeks ago should've been here.

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  59. Ouch, that was botchfully painful.

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  60. No one got my reference.

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  61. Velvet's problem is she has no moves to pop the crowd. She needs a move like the People's Elbow and a finisher that the people will get excited for.

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  62. She's just the porniest of female wrestlers. Everything about her just screams porn. Hard to get that over as a face outside of an Attitude-type product.

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  63. Then have moves that reflect that. Add the Broncobuster to her arsenal.

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  64. This is so technically sound it reminds of Gotch-Hackenschmidt.

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  65. This is actually smart. The less Velvet has to "wrestle" the better.

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  66. Mickie's new song is "Somebody's Gonna Pay?" Does Booger Red know about this?

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  67. Anyone who has satelite radio put on Howard 101 . Awesome ddp shoot interview bout his career n helpin ou jake n hall. DDP is an awesome humanitarian, i am lovin it!

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  68. Uh, she was in the ropes.

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  69. Sigh. TNA, you are full of disappoint tonight.

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  70. Anybody else notice the emo fat girl in the front row jumping up and down wailing after that finish? Ha ha

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  71. No, she clearly bounced off the ropes. And, uh, that's doesn't count, because WRESTLING!

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  72. Help us Bully Ray, you're our only hope.

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  73. Please don't let a Hogan join Aces and Eights.

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  74. Not even Nick? He's hard. He killed a dude.

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  75. I'd also settle for Linda. She's the only person who Hulk never got his win back from.

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  76. Love that Bully no-selled the YOOOOOOOOUUUUU finger.

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  77. +infinite to Bully for stealing the "YOU!" spot.

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  78. ...aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand it's turned into Nitro.

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  79. So TNA's entire roster couldn't handle this group but two 60 year old man could. Splendid.

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  80. Linda is not a true Hogan.

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  81. More Le Sigh. Yeah, who needs to push new guys? Sting and Hogan can still beat those whippersnappers.

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  82. And then running from a 60 year old?

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  83. Hogan punching Bully looks like it was shot in slow motion.

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  84. But yeah, that should've been AJ instead of Sting.

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  85. Or Sting and Hogan should've been laid out anyway. Old tricks shouldn't work on new gangs.

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  86. I don't think it's hyperbole to say that whatever bump the Bully-reveal gave the Aces and Eights angle...tonight just killed it dead.

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  87. WAY too soon for it to be AJ, but Hogan bitching up Aces and Eights should not have happened.

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  88. Not that bad yet, but unless Aces KILLS Sting and Hogan next week, yeah, it's flatlined.

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  89. Aces should've just stepped back, only let one guy take a hit if needed. Not losing gang-on-two, even if one has a bat.

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  90. She no sold the divorce and refused to put the Hulkster over. That makes her a Hogan, brother.

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  91. Taking his money and not putting him over makes her a McMahon.

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  92. Ugh, tonight was not good. I'm not giving up on them yet, but this is dangerous territory they're treading into...

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  93. Dude, a 60 year old man just ran off the TNA World Heavyweight Champion. And then a second 60 year old beat up the 8-man heel faction. And starred each other down. As though this were all about them, and the payoff was a match between them. In 2013. It doesn't matter if Aces kills them next week. It's dead.


    Bully should have single-handedly beaten Hogan bloody. Then when Sting came for the save, the rest of Aces run in and beat him bloody. Credits.

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  94. This was the first ep I haven't been satisfied with.

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  95. A 60 year-old that walked like a mummy in a 50's horror flick.

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  96. Tease it now, deliver it next week. I can accept the surprise factor here "saving" Hogan.


    Remember, to the average fan, Hogan's NOT the broken down husk we know he is. THEY expect him to at least make one good stand.

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  97. Hogan will be the death of this company. And the death of any chance of another alternative getting on major tv ever again.

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  98. All the more reason why Bully should have destroyed him single-handedly. THAT is how Hogan can contribute to the product in 2013. I mean, Brock murdered him TEN YEARS AGO. WWE understood Hogan's value TEN YEARS AGO. Now he's running off the promotion's champion.



    You would have some case if there where anyway that Hogan could actually work a match, and thereby pay off the angle. It'd be a bad case, and you'd be wrong, but it'd be a case. As is, there is no case to made for building the show around Hogan vs. Sting IN 2013.

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  99. That's why you're The Guy...for now.

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  100. I'm willing to wait a week, see if Aces gets their revenge. If TNA starts to "rally" behind those two, then yes, I'll walk away without a second thought. But if this is a "hope spot", and next week Aces gets a little more violent, a little more physical, I'll be willing to let it slide.


    This could also be a drawback to their filming schedule. "Live" show ends with a "good" result, keeps the crowd up, then the taped show ends with what the storyline wants.

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  101. Just like undertaker will be the death of the shield?

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  102. I feel like you're missing my point. Or I'm not adequately communicating it. Or we just need to agree to disagree.

    I'm saying that it doesn't matter if Aces and Eights sneak attack Hogan and Sting next week to get their heat back. Because they still got their asses handed to them by two 60-year old's. And Bully still ran from a 60-year old man. And then those two 60-year old men, having dispatched all eight heels, stared each other down; thereby communicating to their television audience that (at least) this week's show is about them. And it shouldn't ever be about them, because they cannot draw money in 2013.

    Nothing that happens next week is going to alter that. And it's not as though the booking is going to pull a 180, and Bully is going to call Hogan and Sting out, and beat them both bloody.

    If that were going to happen, this week simply wouldn't have happened how it did. They are clearly building to something with Hogan and Sting, but my point is that there is no acceptable payoff to that build. Hogan cannot work a match anymore, and even if he could no one is paying to watch him wrestle Sting in 2013. Both of them should've been sacrificed to the guy that you're actually asking audiences to pay money to watch wrestle.



    That's how this business works, and both companies have forgotten that. Hogan didn't job to Andre at WM3 to set up a rematch at WM4 where Andre put Hogan over. Because they crowd respects Andre, and 50/50 booking. No. Feed that big bastard to future. Period.

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  103. In fairness, nobody in TNA draws money in 2013.

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  104. With their booking, who could be expected to? How's Bully supposed to draw as a champion when he's running scared from a 60-year old man? How's the guy who dethrones Bully supposed to draw when he only beat a guy who was scared of 60-year old man?

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  105. I was at the taping tonight--I'm a lapsed fan/childhood Hogan mark who couldn't resist the opportunity to see the geezer live once I found out TNA was coming to the sleepy hamlet of Indiana, PA (plus, my ticket was only $12). I don't know what the etiquette for posting taping spoilers is around these parts, but let me just say that if you are expecting significant retaliation from Aces and Eights next week, it ain't gonna happen as only one Aces member worked a match and he jobbed. There weren't any run-ins or beat downs, either. That said, the taping of next week's show didn't include any of the backstage segments, which gave the whole thing a sort of disjointed feel. Maybe they will tape some vignettes that make the Aces come off stronger....for what it's worth, the crowd still popped for Hogan's slow motion shirt-tearing/punches.

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  106. It should have been Velvet or Angelina Love.

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  107. Yeah but don't forget 3 months before Brock destroyed Hogan, Hulk was world champion.

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  108. No that's just Ambrose

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  109. Yeah but DAT ASS

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  110. You know what I'll give her? COCK!

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  111. Pics of screwing farm animals WHILE preforming satanic rituals with minors?

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  112. Ryback = Lex Luger

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  113. I'd like it better than what you ARE going to get...

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  114. Velvet would be perfect in that role... trashy look and has the title makes sense.

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  115. Why downvote me?

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  116. They are trying to destroy your push because you got over without first getting approval.


    Wait this is a TNA thread... they are fucking up your push because... well they fuck up everything.

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  117. Sorry, I don't look at Drew like that. His ex-wife's ass is nice though.

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