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ROH TV: August 23rd-24th edition

In this weeks edition, I name drop a Blog of Doom regular, 4-newcomers enter the proving ground, The worst Tattoo in wrestling makes an appearance, and the World Title tournament begins with Jay Lethal taking on Sonjay Dutt in the main event.

Show opens with a video package featuring Jay Briscoe begging not to be striped of the title, and Nigel doing it anyway.  The screen cuts to Kevin Kelly who introduces our opening contest...


TV Title Proving Ground: Vinny Marseglia VS Todd Hanson VS Bryan Fury VS Kongo
OK, Marseglia is the only one of these guys who has even been on ROH TV before--and that was months ago so a brief description of these scrubs is in order

Marseglia looks like a less healthy Jeff Hardy with more tattoos

Hanson is a thick guy with an overgrown beard. He would look right at home in the Wyatt Family.

Fury looks like a wrestler...I really don't know what to add--generic looking but not in the Vanilla Midget sense

Kevin Kelly called Kongo as "indescribable"It's so hard in fact I had to turn to the only man with the diction and vocabulary to do it.




Let me make this clear--he's not fat in the Samoa Joe or Kevin Steen way either--he's fat in a Mable type way.

Oh, right--the match.  The Winner receives a shot at Matt Taven's Television title next week on TV.  Everyone adheres to the Code of Honor except Kongo.  This is 4-corners style with 2 legal men at all times.  Fury and Marseglia start the match.  They engage some chain wrestling while Truth and Taven make their way to the commentary booth.  Vinny takes control with a pair of arm drags and a dropkick.  Hanson makes the blind tag to Fury and bowls Marseglia (I hate typing that) over from behind.  Hanson is clubbing away while Truth explains that he has got The Hoopla Hotties Bodyguard/Manger licenses so they can be present for Taven's matches whether Nigel likes it or not.  In the Ring Hansen lands a spinning powerslam for 2.  Kongo tags Hanson and enters the match.  Kongo stumbles around and uses a combination of bites and headbutts against Vinny.  Fury reaches in and tags Kongo.  Vinny dumps Kongo to the floor and then Hanson comes out of nowhere off the apron to hit the fat man with a suicide dive.  Fury takes both guys on the floor out with a corkscrew plancha.  Marseglia completes the car wreck spot with a senton of the top rope onto his three opponents on the floor.  Hanson is thrown back in but Marseglia takes to much time climbing back in the ring and his caught in a double under hook.  Vinny escapes from Hanson's grasp and the two exchange forearms.  Taven wins my respect forever by describing Todd Hanson with a TMNT reference; "When did Grizzly Redwood find the Secret of the Ooze?"  Hanson cartwheels under a punch from Marseglia and hits a big clothesline just to turn around into a running cross body from Kongo.  Marseglia springboards at Kongo, but he's caught and Samoan dropped.  Kongo is running (really more awkwardly moving about in a body too large for him) wild with a butt splash for Marseglia in the corner.  Kongo looks to due the same to Fury, but is cut off by a superkick from his target.  Kongo is only staggered, but a wheel kick from Hanson puts him down.  Hanson beats Fury down in the corner, but his attempt at a Bronco Buster misses.  a neck breaker takes out Hanson, but Marseglia pounces on Fury with some kicks and an around-the-world legsweep.  Fury tries to fight back but his offense is countered into a great spike DDT that gets 2 for Vinny.  The camera cuts away from the action to focus on Taven telling Kevin Kelly off.  The camera cuts back to the ring just in time to see Fury hit a face buster that I assume is his finish for the three count.  Well that was anti climactic. **  This was basically a commercial for the ROH try-out camps. (Kelly mentioned multiple times that all 4 were being featured after impressing at one)  The match wasn't bad, but Bryan Fury vs Matt Taven isn't exactly Rock vs Austin.  I won't be shocked if Fury just gets squashed next week.

#Partyboys VS C&C Wrestle Factory
So #GreenAsGrass is back after their abysmal performance with the Wolves a few weeks ago.  Here is hoping a heel alignment makes them better.  Caprice Coleman and Mike Sydal start.  Coleman keeps the man with the worst tattoos in wrestling down with an armbar and some armdrags. #NotEvanBourne is whipped into the ropes but he holds on so Coleman's dropkick misses.  #NotMatt Sydal tries to capitalize with a boot, but Coleman ducks it and hits the dropkick.  Cedric Alexander is tagged in and he enters with a senton that gets 2.  #badtats gets a jawbreaker and makes the tag to Zizou Middoux.  Zizou charges into a back body drop...and I don't know if Zizou meant to do a 360 sell or botched the move and landed on his feet but it looked like it was way more painful then a back body drop has to be so I'll give it a pass.  The crowd comments on the haircut that's as stupid as Middoux's name with a Justin Beiber chant.  Alexander is hotshotted by #StillNotMatt Sydal which allows Middoux to dropkick him over the top rope.  The #IllegalPartyBoy beats Alexander down on the outside, then tosses him in so Zizou can record a 1-count.  #partyboys double team Alexander and the heat segment begins in earnest.  #AreYouSickOfThisHashtagJokeYet Sydal locks on a side headlock.  Alexander manages to get to his feet but he's snapmared down and kicked in the face for a 2-count.  Middoux is tagged in and he hits Alexander with an ugly running knee.  Zizou does this wonderfully douchey dance then whiffs on a standing front flip legdrop.  It looks like Cedric will be able to make the tag so #I'mTryingToHardWithThisJoke Sydal takes out Coleman on the apron.  The #Partyboys try to drag Alexander back to their corner--but it's a jumping enzugiri for #Hashtag Sydal and a mule kick on the way back for Zizou Middoux.  The hot tag is made and it's an STO and Bionic elbows are for both of Coleman's opponents.  Triple northern lights suplex on Middoux gets 2.  Coleman misses a charge in the corner and #MikeSydal blindsides him with a clothesline.  Middoux hits him with Kingston's wacky kick and gets a 2-count.  Alexander comes in to even the odds and tosses both jobbers.  Alexander's dive is blocked and #LittleBro Sydal tries to springboard in, but He is yanked down by Coleman so he lands balls first on the apron.  Coleman dropkicks him through the turnbuckle and Alexander dives over the top to take out everyone on the floor.  Middoux is thrown back in the ring and C&C hits overtime for the pin.**1/2  C&C is still solid and #DoucheBros are easy to dislike.  There's nothing special here but the show isn't harmed by it's presence.

Kevin Kelly introduces us to inside Ring of Honor, but is interrupted by Steve Corino!  Kelly wants to know what he's doing in the studio and Corino says he's here to do his job as a "broadcast journalist".  Kelly tells him to take that up with Nigel to witch Steve responds "He won't return my calls, I don't understand--What did I do?"  Kelly is incredulous and just turns back to the camera to resume the segment while Corino creeps in to the shot behind him.  Steve Corino is very, very funny--and if this segment is any indication, an angle where he plays dumb and keeps begging for his job back could be hilarious.

Footage of the American Wolves winning the ROH Tag Team titles in Toronto. This is an example of the weird chronology Having every show available on PPV creates.  The Wolves win has been on the site for on-demand order for weeks--so it's not really a spoiler, but matches from that Toronto show still haven't even aired on TV and they are acting like the tournament's just starting.  I just watch the shows when they become available at ROHWrestling.com to avoid the problem, but I understand people not wanting to buy every important show at $14.95.

Cole gives a very defensive interview about how he is IN NO WAY ASSOCIATED WITH STEVE CORINO WITHIN THE WRESTLING WORLD.  HE IS A FRIEND OUTSIDE OF ROH, BUT I TOTALLY HATED S.C.U.M. TO.  His promo was as inconspicuous as any post CAPSLOCKMAN has ever made.

ROH Title Tournament--First Round: Jay Lethal VS Sonjay Dutt
They start by trading pinfall attempts.  Lethal gets caught in the ropes and seems to botch a reversal, but Dutt covers it up beautifully with a La Magistral.  Dutt sends Lethal to the floor with a Hurricanrana and then follows him out.  Dutt charges at Lethal, then rolls along the apron for leverage in headscissoring Lethal into the barricade.  Dutt tosses Lethal back into the ring and hits a springboard leg drop.  Sonjay locks in an Octopus hold that is eventually reversed to a side headlock.  The two men trade headlocks until Dutt attempts to back suplex Lethal.  Lethal lands on his feet and gets 2 with an arm drag and dropkick to the face.  Lethal continues to--in the words of Kevin Kelly--build momentum and chops Dutt all around the ring.  Sonjay goes for a powder, but Lethal follows him out with a suicide dive.

Commercial

Back with Lethal blocking a kick and trying to hit a tombstone.  Dutt preforms a jaw-dropping reversal where he slips out, hand springs off the mat and then slides up Jay Lethal to spike him with a DDT!  Can honestly say I've never seen a pildriver turned into a DDT before.  Both guys are up around the same time and they trade blows in the centre of the ring.  Dutt gets the better of the exchange and whips Lethal corner to corner for a Yakuza Kick.  Lethal is perched on the top rope for a super huricanrana, but when it's delivered Lethal keeps rolling in the air and turns it into a pinning predicament.  Dutt escapes that but whiffs on his kick to the sitting Lethal.  It doesn't matter however, Dutt hits a standing moonsault before Lethal has the chance to move and gets 2.  Dutt calls for the Moonsault-Doublestomp, but he takes way to long playing to the crowd and gets rolled up for 2.  Lethal is clotheslined down and this time Dutt isn't fucking around.  Up top he goes but Lethal rolls out of the way of the Doublestomp.  Lethal's superkick is blocked and Dutt nails him with one of his own!  Lethal misses wild with a superkick and an enzugiri attempt and Dutt superkicks him again.  This is awesome with Dutt in control but not able to hit anything that has the stopping power to really serve as a finish--every time he tries Lethal counters to stay alive.  As if on cue Dutt charges and is caught with a Lethal combination that gets 2 for Jay.  Lethal powers himself up and hits an inverted fireman's carry facebuster that hits Dutt hard and the match's pace slows down with both guys having taken some damage.  Bodyslam for Dutt and Lethal calls for Hail to the King.  Dutt is up at the last second and he cuts Lethal off.  Lethal is hanging in the ropes so Dutt leaps over the corner from the apron to legdrop him.  Lethal is in real trouble, but Dutt spends too much time playing to the audience again.  He springboards in with a splash that gets nothing but knees.  Lethal looks to capitalize with the Lethal Injection but gets drop kicked in the face by Dutt while he's in the handstand. Springboard splash hits this time but only gets 2.  Lethal is rolled up for 2.  Dutt tries a variety of strikes--but they are all dodged or blocked.  Lethal ducks a clothesline and drills Dutt in the back of the head with a superkick.  Lethal Injection sends Dutt back to Bollywood. ***1/2  A great match that didn't feature a single finisher kick out--a change of pace for ROH.  Both guys would be in control for extended periods, but neither would let the other hit many big signature moves, until Lethal finally did and won.

Next week features "Machine Gun" Karl Anderson vs ACH and Adam Cole vs Mark Briscoe in tournament matches.  Matt Taven will also defend his TV Title against Bryan Fury.  That sounds like the most stacked TV card since Steel Cage Warfare to me.

See you all next week                   

Comments

  1. Second Jay Lethal namedrop of the week! When I hung out with him that one time, I mentioned how I really wanted to see Dutt back in ROH where he could really cut loose, and Lethal agreed. I'm surprised WWE doesn't snatch him up, he's amazing and has a great build. If he did that moonstomp in front of a bunch of kids who'd never seen it before, he'd be insta-over.

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  2. Amsterdam_Adam_CurryAugust 29, 2013 at 10:59 PM

    ROH: It's jobberriffic!

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  3. I read that QT Marshall did a job at the recent NXT tapings so they are turning into a jobber farm system.

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  4. Amsterdam_Adam_CurryAugust 29, 2013 at 11:31 PM

    Yeah, I heard about that too. There's probably a couple thousand or so wrestlers in the U.S., and out of that pool they bring in QT fucking Marshall? What the fuck are they smoking down there in Tampa?

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  5. Turning into? James Gibson/Jamie Noble, Spanky/Bryan Kendrick, and Paul London say hi!

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  6. 6 of 10 performers on this show are full on enhancement talent.


    I'm watching Manhatten Mayham V right now. It's pretty awesome

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  7. There is one thing good about QT, and it's that his team with RD Evans is called Marshall Law!

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  8. At least those guy have talent. QT isn't talented enough to play a security guard on RAW

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  9. Amsterdam_Adam_CurryAugust 30, 2013 at 12:05 AM

    It kind of makes sense when you book the card as a whole, but in a 1 hour show it's a bit much.

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  10. Amsterdam_Adam_CurryAugust 30, 2013 at 12:06 AM

    That is the ONLY good thing about him, and even that's nothing great.

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  11. Especialy when next week is two marquee matches and a title fight--they couldn't move one of the tourney matches to this show to even it out?



    Unrelated


    Having just finished Manhattan Mayhem I think I've realized what makes reDRagon matches so consistently great. It's Fish and O'Reilly's timing. I don't know if it's a conscious effort, but they using a slightly different formula then the Midnights/RR Express one that is used as the template for tag team wrestling. reDRagon's heat segments are shorter, and contrary to the usual of the heels being in control most of the match, Fish and O'Reilly get their asses handed to them most of the time. Then, at just the right moment they'll come across as ultimate opportunists and take half the opposing team out so they can fight 2 on 1 for an extended period. They aren't re-inventing the wheel but the matches always feel fresh and full of energy.

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  12. My point is that ROH is a farm system for their entire card and always has been. Working ROH is the fast track to the WWE

    Main event--Bryan and Punk
    Upper Mid--Seth Rollins
    Mid--Antonio Cesaro
    Jobber/still in NXT--Sami Zayn, Chris Hero (I will NOT call him Kasious Ohno) Evan Bourne

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  13. Nothing Great? Shenanigans! That's the best tag team pun in ages!! I ALMOST wanted to cheer for them based on it alone (Then Kingston came out...)

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  14. Amsterdam_Adam_CurryAugust 30, 2013 at 12:31 AM

    And it's not like there's some law saying you have to show the matches in the order they happened. That's the great thing about a taped show, you can edit it however you want to.


    Fish & O'Reilly have been really good lately. They play douchebag hipster heel character perfectly, that their in-ring work is pretty solid. As you said, they work really well together.

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  15. I didnt get that point made from the origins post but now, RoH has no one, maybe Adam Cole, that can be anything more than a jobber to them. RoH has no one on their roster that you can point to and day that they can help the WWE in a few years. This promotionbreezed some of the top talents in wrestling today but that is just a memory now and once Cornette came in and fucked things up, it hammered the nail about 3/4 of the way into the coffin.

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  16. So my theory is, ROH is waiting for TNA to collapse, and then they pounce on everyone WWE doesn't want. in the meantime we get the opener of this show, two guys with beards, dimestore Umaga and Vinny Shittytats. Not that I'm complaining, I liked what little we saw of all 4 guys. Yes, including Kongo. (ROH could use a monster, and no, 5'11, 245lb Michael Elgin does not count as a monster, no matter how much Kevin Kelly talks about his strength.)


    You were beating the #hashtag joke into the ground, but considering the fact that you had to watch Iesha and Shaniqua carry #greenasthebastardchildofthehulkandkermitthefrog, it's understandable.


    And here's hoping Dutt sticks around. Aside from the sprinkler elbow, I always liked the guy.

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  17. Vinny holds a place in my heart thanks to a killer top rope backbreaker he took at a show i was it. shit was crazyyy.

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  18. OW. I'm sure it wasn't pleasant for Vinny, but the guy who delivered that move is INSANE. Way to damn near destroy your own knee, pal.

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  19. If you don't know the story of Vinny Marseglia's tattoos, prepare to laugh/be creeped out


    First he went all Single White Female on Randy Orton, copying all his tattoos and his gear then he must have said "man, this is really creepy, I need to change this"


    So he went all Single White Female on Jeff Hardy, getting all his tattoos over the Orton and copied his gear, instead

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  20. "RoH has no one, maybe Adam Cole, that can be anything more than a jobber to WWE or even TNA for that matter."


    Yeah, I'm gonna have to say no to that. Ciampa is a star, ACH reeks of charisma, reDRagon are criminally undervalued, Kevin Steen won't get signed--but he could have found success in the mid card at least if he'd been afforded the opportunity

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  21. ACH has improved and Steen would never get an opportunity with the WWE. Ciampa has already been cut from developmental and reDRagon don't fit the bill for the WWE.

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