- Taped from Landover, MD
- Your hosts are Vince & Jesse.
(Well, the Network has randomly added the next 13 SNME shows, so back we go into the reposts. This is another one from a 4-in-1 rant, so it’s point system again.)
Oddly enough, both teams here were formed on the heels of one member of a more well-known team being fired - in this case, Tom Zenk and Iron Sheik were fired and replaced with Tito Santana & Boris Zhukov, respectively. (To be fair, Zenk quit.) Tito starts off with Boris and uses speed to keep him off-guard. They work on the arm in tandem and Tito rolls up Volkoff for two. Small package gets two. Bolsheviks hammer on Martel, but Tito comes in with a bodypress for two. Bolsheviks double-team for two. Much choking is evident. Zukhov gets a backdrop suplex for two as Jesse praises the technical acumen of the Russians. Boris hits the chinlock, but Santana makes the tag to Martel, who gets a hiptoss, backdrop, and quickly finishes the first fall via the Boston Crab at 4:26. Second fall: Santana dumps Volkoff and Strike Force double-teams Boris into another Crab. It's a donnybrook, and Martel gets dropped on the top rope by Volkoff. Side salto gets two. Backbreaker gets two. Boris works the back, as does Volkoff. Double-elbow gets two. Martel gets a sunset flip for two, and everyone tags. Santana gets the hot tag and it's BONZO GONZO. Flying Jalapeno gets two. The heels miscommunicate and Tito gets the pin on Boris at 7:56 for two straight falls. Longish but passable. 1 for 1. (Man, remember the days when there were so many tag teams that you could have tag team jobbers?)
- Jake Roberts v. Samoan Sika.
In the human Escher painting that is the samoan family tree, I believe Sika is the father of the guys currently working in OVW as the Island Boyz, and is Rikishi's uncle. (According to the family tree on Wikipedia, he is Rikishi’s uncle and the father of Rosey, but not Jamal.) But god knows I'm probably wrong because I have about as much luck with samoan relations as I do trying to remember anything from high school calculus. I think my life would be much easier if they all started wearing nametags listing immediate family. Jake works the arm to start and dodges a clothesline. He keeps punching, but gets backdropped. Fuji gets a cheapshot in, and Sika takes over. He goes to that old samoan standby, the VULCAN NERVE PINCH OF DOOM, and that lasts a while. Jake slugs back, but Mr. Fuji trips him up. Sika charges, but Jake dodges and rolls him up for the weak pin at 3:30. Fuji takes the DDT afterwards, but it fails to dislodge his hat. I'm tempted to give a point just for that, but it wouldn't be fair to those who have worked for their points. 1 for 2.
- WWF title match: Hulk Hogan v. King Kong Bundy.
This is a rematch from a show that I desperately hoped was in the pile (but wasn't), as Bundy beat Hogan on a countout on the November '87 SNME. On the undercard of that show, Bret Hart & Randy Savage did a 15:00 wrestling clinic and THAT'S the match I've been looking for. Andre the Giant is acting as Bundy's manager tonight. Hogan overpowers Bundy to start and runs him into the turnbuckles. Bundy bails and confers with Andre. Back in, Hogan gets a clothesline, Bundy bails again. Back in, Hogan slugs away and works the arm. Bundy actually reverses to his own armbar, albeit via a hairpull, but it's still sort of like something resembling wrestling. An elbow puts Hogan down, and Bundy keeps on the arm. Hulk responds with a mini-version of the hulking up, and slams Bundy with ease, but hurts his arm. Psychology? HERE??? Bundy slams him back, but misses an elbowdrop. Hogan comes back and the poor ref gets creamed by Bundy in the corner and he's legally dead. (Now THAT’S a believable ref bump!) Hogan slugs away as a replacement joins us. Bundy bails as the dead ref gets stretchered out, and we take a commercial break. We return with Bundy pounding away. Clothesline and kneedrop get two. He dumps Hogan and won't let him back in. Finally, he chokes away and splashes Hogan for two, then hits the chinlock. Two Avalanches and a big splash…get two. Hulk up, you know the rest at 12:04. Andre sneaks in (as much as Andre could sneak anywhere) and kicks the shit out of Hogan during the posedown. He chokes him down for a good five minutes and a brigade of midcarders storm out to pull him off and save Hogan. Spoilsports. Match was looking to be okay at the beginning, but turned into standard issue Hogan. 1 for 3. (More importantly, it helped to set up the Main Event rematch between Hulk and Andre!)
- Koko B. Ware v. Greg Valentine.
Oooo, we're into the REALLY high-quality portion of the show, I see. The last half-hour of SNME was generally like, well, the last half-hour of SNL. Koko overpowers him, but gets hotshotted, and Greg drops an elbow for two. Valentine tries to work the leg, but doesn't get anywhere. He stomps Koko down and gets an axehandle for two, however. We hit the chinlock and Koko gets dumped like Vince Russo from a job. Back in, clothesline gets two. Brutus Beefcake joins us at ringside, allowing Koko a pair of cradles for two. Backslide gets two. Valentine bails to regroup as the ref sends Beefcake back. Back from a break as Hammer chops away. Backdrop and elbow get two as even Jesse and Vince are commenting on how little offense Koko is getting here. Valentine goes up, but gets slammed off and Koko comes back with his token jobber offense before Valentine catches a kneebreaker and finishes with the figure-four at 7:28. Pretty much a glorified (and boring) squash. 1 for 4. (Hall of Famer Koko B. Ware, ladies and gentlemen! Is Valentine even in?)
- Blah blah blah, usual filler crap to wrap things up.
The Bottom Line: Strike Force v. Bolsheviks may have been a point, but it's hardly anything I'd bother going out of my way to see. Throw this one on the scrap heap.
I believe I saw a clip of Valentine giving a HOF speech and he still looked like he had not aged at all... I always loved when he smiled when the crowd cheered him giving Bagwell the figure four...
ReplyDeleteAh, the old Capital Center.
ReplyDeleteGreg Valentine was inducted in 2004, when the WWE brought back the Hall of Fame.
ReplyDeleteBTW, The Main Event episodes are added, too. Not just SNME.
ReplyDeleteGreat angle that never happened: The Iron Shiek and Tom Zenk return as a team and swear revenge on their former partners in Strike Force and the Bolsheviks for abandoning them. Those would be some promos.
ReplyDeleteHe looks like a human version of Grumpy Cat.
ReplyDeleteAND the 1988 edition restores the finish to the tag team title match. It's just 15 extra seconds or something, but now you can see how Strike Force won!
ReplyDeleteSHEIK: "Nikola Volkoff, you a no good son of a bitch, cheap Jew Russian motherfucker!"
ReplyDeleteTOM: "Hey Dave, one time Ole Anderson told me that he'd suck..."
MEAN GENE: "Tom, my name's Gene, not Dave!"
Koko used to have some cool finishers. The Ghostbuster and he did this missile dropkick from the top where he landed on his feet.
ReplyDeleteSika's promo with a giant piece of bread to give the implication he wanted to eat Damien = Samoan racism gold.
ReplyDeleteI remember that speech for him dedicating it to his dad (Johnny Valentine). And yeah, he looked like he stepped into a time machine after Royal Rumble 92 and stepped out into that ceremony.
ReplyDeleteWhat a Hall of Fame heavy card. Only King Kong Bundy and Boris Zhukov have yet to be inducted! ... The Wild Samoans are in, right?
ReplyDeleteSika, father of the chosen one Roman Reigns.
ReplyDelete"Man, remember the days when there were so many tag teams that you could have tag team jobbers?" Even today with Rybaxel
ReplyDeleteHe still looks the same age.
ReplyDeleteAnd Heath Slater and whoever he teams up with this week.
ReplyDeletenice avatar
ReplyDeleteHe still looks like the same middle aged woman he's always been.
ReplyDeleteStill super annoyed that the commercial they're running for SNME during their shows includes Obsession in the background but all of the ones I checked on the Network have the generic 1988 theme overdubbed.
ReplyDeleteI guess they had enough money for just the synth repeating once or twice?
ReplyDeleteThey label them as SNME though, that annoys me for some reason.
ReplyDeleteThis was the 1st SNME episode I ever taped on VHS. I wore it out playing Bundy's avalanche to the ref over and over. Vince's call made it that much better ("Look out here comes BUNDY! AHHHHHHHH!!").... And of course, Andre choking out Hogan was classic.
ReplyDeleteThis was probably the swan song for Bundy's first run, wasn't it? By the time the WM4 tournament rolled around he was nowhere to be found.
ReplyDeleteAccording to Bret's book Survivor Series 87 was his last show. Bret did a drawing of Bundy puking penis's to commemorate the occasion. It did not bring tears to Bundy's eyes. In fact he seems to hate The Hitman according to his shoot interview.
ReplyDeleteThey also had a Viking trying to impale Undertaker with a sword. Implying all Vikings are war pillagers.
ReplyDeleteSheik did get to come back for job duty in 1988 and then did job duty in WCW for Sting - and then he returned to the WWF as Mustafa.
ReplyDeleteI remember when the Hart Foundation went on the Brother Love Show and challenged the winner of the Demolition/Colossal Connection for the title's. Brother Love's response? "Well first you have to get by the Bolsheviks." I just laughed.
ReplyDeleteBoth Orndorff and Bundy packed it in before 1988 rolled around. Bundy had to do this taping in December and he was gone until 1994. Not sure why Wonderful left outside of injuries and no longer marketable. They had a perfect black scorpion with a Orndorff heel turn ready for Sting but alas they didn't do it. At least Orndorff had a good heel run in WCW to close his career.
ReplyDeleteHa, interesting. It was probably the last show they worked together, because History of WWE says this show was taped in December '87, a few weeks after Survivor Series.
ReplyDeleteI love that Jake won here by rollup, thus avoiding the question of whether even his DDT could overcome the "hard-headed Samoan" wrestling trope.
ReplyDeleteNothing random about it, commercials on RAW were selling that they purposely added all the 80's episodes first as a way to segment them. Perhaps a little dollop of logic from whoever is in charge of uploading content now.
ReplyDelete...puking penises?
ReplyDeleteBret also said Bundy took the drawing and a pen and labeled every penis with the name of a different Hart brother. Bret thought it was amusing, particularly since Bundy correctly named each one.
ReplyDeleteI'm shocked Scott didn't recommend this one just for the best ref bump in recorded history. That guy got CRUSHED.
ReplyDeleteAnd he should've given the point for Fuji's hat staying on after the DDT.
Valentine figured out the secret: if you look 40 when you're 28, as Valentine did, you'll also look 40 when you're 55. See also: Dan Severn.
ReplyDeleteI'm guessing Tommy Young and Tim White don't count then?
ReplyDeleteMusic licensing rates for a commercial are cheaper than licensing for a broadcast.
ReplyDeleteValentine seems permanently hungover.
ReplyDeleteBundy left in January of 1988
ReplyDeleteI haven't read Bret's book in a little while, but I thought that he was generally cool th Bundy from reading it. Then I read Bundy's shoot and it sounds like he can't stand Bret.
ReplyDeleteWell yeah but making fun of Bret's book is just....so fun.
ReplyDeleteNobody hates the HitMan! Unless they hate the way he brings tears to their eyes!
ReplyDeleteHis ex wife hates him. But he can't figure out why even though he cheated on her in every town he wrestled in.
ReplyDelete"logic" or "we don't want to get the Federal Trade Commission on our ass"
ReplyDeleteTim doesn't count since he actually got injured. Young......I'd need to see it again.
ReplyDeleteFun thing to watch for during this show. When the midcarders come running in to save Hogan from the Andre beatdown, Hacksaw uses his 2x4 to hit Andre. When that doesn't work, he bails from the ring. In frustration, he slams the 2x4 against the apron and it fuckin' snaps in half and goes flying into the crowd and hits some people.
ReplyDeleteAh, that resulted in one of my all-time favorite squashes, where Nikolai attempted the special extended version of the Russian national anthem for Wrestlemania and Neidhart snapped.
ReplyDeletehttp://youtu.be/tJ5PP3J6R9s?t=2m9s
It was a tough call on the hat, I'm not gonna lie. I could have went either way with it.
ReplyDeleteThat's just common sense.
ReplyDeleteI just watched the first SNME I remember from when I was a little kid. A couple interesting things I noticed:
ReplyDelete1. Damn, they really had no shame sweetening the crowd reactions.
2. Vince is too much.
3. None of the wrestlers could make it look like they weren't reading directly off of cue cards at all.
4. Even still, it was fun.
yeah it wasn't until I rewatched these about a decade ago that I realized...oh...the crowd isn't actually going crazy all the time.
ReplyDeleteOrndorff left around this time to open a bunch of bowling alleys, for real. Lol
ReplyDeleteTo a kid the big baby face attempt save was awesome
ReplyDeleteEverything is racist today scott. Everything :/
ReplyDeleteHe looks like HHH allergic to bees
ReplyDeleteI think the best thing about Andre in this era was the fantastic suit he rocked. There's just something lost in this era of everyone wearing their gear at all times, but Andre looks so cool standing their in that plaid jacket...and he straight murdered Hogan while wearing it, which made it extra badass.
ReplyDeletespeaking of that. When did Demolition turn heel? Did they actually do a heel turn?
ReplyDeleteThey debuted as heels, and stayed that way until the double turn with the Powers of Pain, then turned again when Crush joined.
ReplyDeleteI mean when. They were faces at WM6 and then heels at SS90. Was there an actual turn or did they just start working as heels?
ReplyDeleteWonder if they were running long at that point. Not that anyone wanted to see Nikolai and Boris stink up the ring, but still "brawl, Hart Attack, 3 count" at a WM seems kinda silly.
ReplyDeleteI taped SNME once as a kid. I don't remember the episode. The only thing I remember is the commercial for a Kevin Bacon movie. I'm thinking "Tremors". Let me check google.......yep that's right. Came out in January '90. Weird that I remember that.
ReplyDeleteI always through he did that to prove he wasn't hitting Andre with a loaded piece of wood.
ReplyDeleteThey had a ton of matches on that card.
ReplyDeleteProbably around the time LOD showed up.
ReplyDeleteWait a minute... Rick Martel is not in the Hall of Fame. Rick Martel beat Koko B. Ware at WrestleMania VI. Koko B. Ware is in the Hall of Fame. What gives? BUT WAIT... Rick Martel is French Canadian. So are the Rougeau Brothers, Frenchy Martin and Dino Bravo. Does this indicate a conspiracy to exclude French Canadians from the Hall of Fame?
ReplyDeleteTUNE INTO NITRO TO FIND OUT?
Sometimes I wonder if people realize the problem with today's wrestling is merely that is needs to slow the fuck down. These days, Hogan vs. Bundy would be the main event on Smackdown. What used to have you up at 1 in the morning (two main eventers facing off) is now on every week and won't draw flies. If wrestling slowed down and RAW were more like Main Event, you'd instantly bring back that want, that need, to see these guys in action. People used to order PPV events because it was the only place to see guys like Hogan and Andre actually compete in a lengthy match, except for SNME, but then that was merely a PPV before PPV events became commonplace and Vince realized he could charge for everything.
ReplyDeleteImagine today if Cena and Orton were only shown, at least in singles and title matches, on "special events." Their stock would skyrocket with each group of fans, from the blind followers to the hardcore haters. Instead, they have faced off hundreds of times on TV/PPV (that is not an exaggeration, folks) since 2008. Yes, HUNDREDS, as in more than 200. It's fucking mindblowing, isn't it? How many times did Andre face Hogan? Three during the hot period and once before, in 1980? You know damn well that if Andre were still alive, you'd pay to see him face Hogan, even if he pulled a Bobo Brazil and had to prop himself up in the corner the entire time.
Anyway, guess I'll go watch those 13 SNME shows on the 'work.
I always thought it was gimmicked to break but didn't cooperate (like the spanish announce table at times) and Hacksaw broke it on the ring in frustration after. Still, you could be right.
ReplyDeleteNot long after Wrestlemania - before Crush joined. There was no one moment I recall, just a slow change. They interfered with the Harts/Rockers match, they changed their music, they brought back Fuji as manager, and they added Crush. It was a reinvention to try to keep them relevant, but their time was up and it didn't work. Still, the WWF probably would have been better off giving Smash a singles push than to repackage him as the Repo Man.
ReplyDeleteNope. That's dinosaur thinking.
ReplyDeleteIf anything, they need to fucking speed up even more, like Weird Al.