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BoD Sunday NFL Thread

Thank god the NFL regular season has arrived. Like last year, I will offer picks for today. So, here are my five picks for the week, against the spread of course:

At Pittsburgh -6 vs. Cleveland
At Chicago -7 vs. Buffalo
Washington +3 at Houston
New Orleans -3 at Atlanta
Oakland +6.5 at New York Jets

Comments

  1. Welp, time for the Falcons to disappoint yet again.

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  2. Finally San Francisco's offseason from Hell is over.

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  3. Seeing how I picked New Orleans to win, Falcons will probably win by two touchdowns today

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  4. Mitch, The GodfatherSeptember 7, 2014 at 10:47 AM

    Looks liked Bradshaw gained the weight that Strahan lost.

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  5. Cam can't go today. Should I bet my life savings on Tampa and then retire?

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  6. Michael Strahan played football?

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  7. Who is the backup

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  8. Anyone see Merril Hoge completely bury Johnny Football this morning?

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  9. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 10:51 AM

    What he'd say?

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  10. YES! It was glorious. Hoge is the best analyst they've got.

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  11. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 10:52 AM

    If they kept Cupcake from Hard Knocks, they'd be 12-4 easily.

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  12. that he couldn't make the simplest of reads and if he played today it would be only because of politics

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  13. Let's cover Bears and Raiders. Yay!

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  14. ESPN needs to fire the new studio girl. She looks nice, but she can't ID players or teams. That's awful.

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  15. Next in ESPN: CFL - Hamilton vs. Montreal.

    Am I dreaming this?

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  16. Carr is starting over Matt Shaub. If I were Carr I'd say thanks but I'm good.

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  17. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 10:56 AM

    Hopefully he won't be killed on the field as quickly as David.

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  18. that's what I would be afraid of. Not sure why they are throwing him to the wolves already

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  19. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 10:57 AM

    Worked for Macho Man


    "Which one of those two is Rick Steiner?"
    "Um.....the one in the middle!"

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  20. I was so mad Tyler Starr made the team fuck that guy

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  21. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 10:58 AM

    I dislike Hoge and Schlereth (which is why I don't like NFL Live, ESPN kisses the NFL's ass more than the NFL's own network), but I'm OK with Manziel-bashing.

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  22. Woke up 15 minutes ago. Just enough to time to get high and take a shower and now it's football time. PST > est

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  23. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 10:59 AM

    Fuck Jacques Smith, that dude should've been cut.

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  24. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 10:59 AM

    Hell yeah.

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  25. Checking fantasy....done!

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  26. Berman keeps trying to get the new studio over. No one gives a shit.

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  27. Yes, put everything you own on Tampa

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  28. The game has probably passed old Boomer by

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  29. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:01 AM

    $100+ million for ESPN's new studio, and I couldn't give a shit about it. I do like the cleaner ticker and graphics that make it easier to read from a distance, but I don't care about a 50-screen, uh, screen.

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  30. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:01 AM

    He's still using his catchphrases from 1991, so I'd say yes.

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  31. Back when I marathoned football nearly religiously, that always made me so jealous of the west coast. Football from 10am to 8 pm then a normal night's sleep to be ready for Monday must be nice.



    Now, I can barely get through my Giants. Fucking Goodell

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  32. He must have one of those Big Show iron-clad contracts. It's long past time for him to go

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  33. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:01 AM

    It also lines perfectly with meals; breakfast during the morning 10am slate, lunch for the late games, dinner during SNF.

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  34. I'm a 8pm or after dinner guy every day except when football is. Eating food while football is on is hard to top

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  35. Did Atlanta fix the o-line? If not, then take New Orleans, easy

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  36. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:03 AM

    Time for Keyshawn Michaels to go chase 3rd straight BoD FF league title. JUST WIN BABY

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  37. Baker's out for the year, IIRC.

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  38. Lets go Pats! Zo is sounding particularly gravely, so I don't know if that's good news or bad news!

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  39. Their center is a bad ass

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  40. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:04 AM

    Could that FOX bug be any smaller?

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  41. which means the position has been upgraded, right? Who could be any worse?

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  42. Pats game on CBS, nice!

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  43. Central Time is my favorite - When i was in Chicago waking up at 11:30 just in time for a noon kick off was great.

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  44. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:04 AM

    I like in NOrCal, so it's OAK/NYJ here. Thank God for RedZone.

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  45. Red zone is the best TV invention ever

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  46. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:05 AM

    Yep

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  47. anyone else watching the Jeter ceremonies?

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  48. Great day to see the a browns lose!

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  49. We got Pit/Cle on CBS and Atl/NO on Fox

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  50. Fuck no? Yeah, I'll go with that.

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  51. Got Was/Hou and Mia/NE.

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  52. Cleveland is not bothering to play defense on this first drive

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  53. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:07 AM

    It's touching they're celebrating his death with a memorial patch.

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  54. The Dolphins are doing good things!!!!!

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  55. I'd rather have those games

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  56. I'm watching Redzone anyway.

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  57. And that's supposed to be where they're "good"

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  58. you a fan? If so, it's going to be a long year

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  59. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:09 AM

    Browns off to the familiar start. I have their D today. Fuck.

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  60. Falcons/Saints not on national tv? Wassupwitdat?

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  61. the Jeter #2 flags will fly at half-mast to mark the elimination of the Yankees in a week or so.

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  62. They hold firm at the end.

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  63. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:11 AM

    Wait did they call back the Steelers TD?

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  64. Not really. Huge Indians and Cavs fan. Browns moved when I first became a sports fan so my passion for them has never been there.

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  65. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:12 AM

    It's kinda crazy that he's only played 1 game in his career where the Yanks wre mathematically eliminated

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  66. Crowd noise in Houston bothering RG3.

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  67. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:12 AM

    FG for steelers. I'll take it.

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  68. Mitch, The GodfatherSeptember 7, 2014 at 11:13 AM

    I got KC/Ten. Yay me.

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  69. So the Saints cut Shayne Graham... to resign him. Guess there really wasn't anyone else out there.

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  70. wouldn't say kinda - that's an amazing stat. Though I think the number goes up this year.

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  71. weird seeing players on ipads instead of those chalkboard things. I would totally be surfing the web

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  72. Awful lot of field goals recently. Like 6 in a row.

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  73. JACKSONVILLE SCORES A TD! Could this be the year?


    Probably not, but hey, at least they have a lead.

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  74. Philly sucks. Fuck the Eagles.

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  75. Brian Hoyer went to the same high school as me zomg

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  76. Brian Hoyer looks a bit like Aldo Montoya

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  77. ya'll about the same age, righ?

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  78. nice pass by Hoyer

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  79. Danieal Manning and Johnny Knox are from my hometown too.

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  80. Calling my shot: Philly will suck this year as NFL defenses adjust and Chip Kelly is exposed as a hack.

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  81. Few years older than me. His brother was in mine and he was okay.

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  82. the east is so shitty that they will still win it anyway

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  83. Pittsburgh's defense is still old and crappy. This one might be a shootout

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  84. Mitch, The GodfatherSeptember 7, 2014 at 11:21 AM

    Their defense being old is false. I believe they only have two starters over 30.

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  85. I stand corrected. It's still shitty though.

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  86. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:22 AM

    Brandon Cooks off to a nice start, 48 yds already

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  87. TOUCHDOWN JAGS!

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  88. Jacksonville up 14-0 on the Eagles. Hahahahahahaa. I love it.

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  89. Well Miami immediately reverted to type. I'm going to keep watching though because I'm a masochist.

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  90. Dude on the Jags has 2 catches for 2 touchdowns for his first 2 receptions ever.

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  91. Mitch, The GodfatherSeptember 7, 2014 at 11:25 AM

    I was this close to starting Foles. Whew.

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  92. Graham hits from 50... didn't think he had that range in his leg.

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  93. Anyone who had Allen Hurns on their fantasy squad should be buying every lottery ticket they can get their hands on.

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  94. Wow, wtf Foles. That pick is going to kill me.

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  95. Oh fuck you Mike fucking Wallace.

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  96. Allen Hurns you're the goat of fantasy!

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  97. Cleveland still not playing defense

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  98. And now Ellerbe AND Koa Misi are hurt. Fuck everything.

    I think 30 minutes into the seaon is a new record for losing all hope.

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  99. That was an embarrassing drive.

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  100. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:35 AM

    My first TD on the bench with Blount scoring six points I can't use

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  101. Pittsburgh's offense is straight hot FIYAH

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  102. Mitch, The GodfatherSeptember 7, 2014 at 11:37 AM

    Too bad, Julio.

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  103. We never had any in Carolina once we saw the receiving corp

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  104. On a lighter note, LOLSKINS

    http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--z-zEVyAp--/c_fit,fl_progressive,q_80,w_636/lb1bznbwmprr14uenv6w.gif

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  105. If you have as many as 11 warm bodies on defense you're still better placed than we are right now.

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  106. Yeah right. I'm a Cowboys fan and I can tell you that's not true.

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  107. Geno Smith fumble in the red zone.

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  108. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:44 AM

    Nice catch blanco niño

    But too bad your ass got saaaaaaaaaaaaaacked

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  109. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:44 AM

    Vintage Geno!

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  110. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:45 AM

    Cooks looking as good as advertised so far in NO. Paying off as my WR2 so far

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  111. The Atlanta D pretty much pulled Robinson into the endzone there.

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  112. Not a dagger, but damn that's gotta hurt Atlanta pretty bad. Get the ball to the Saints 5, fumble, and give up a TD on the next drive. And their D had only bent to that point...

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  113. Cleveland's offense is the cure they need

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  114. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:50 AM

    MVP MVP MVP

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  115. They need to start drug-testing kickers. 50 yards is starting to become automatic.

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  116. Like Kevin Ogletree last year. Big first week, shit rest of the year

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  117. Redskins vs. Texans is certainly an exercise in offensive futility so far.

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  118. Ryan Tannehill blows

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  119. Nah. Just 1/2 the goal posts.

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  120. Devin Hester eclipses his number of catches from 2013 with "one."

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  121. http://screengrabber.deadspin.com/redskins-are-tackling-their-own-teammates-in-mid-season-1631660251/+bubbaprog



    Yet entertainingly bad.

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  122. We are fucking awful. 3-13 is looking more and more likely. #doom #gloom

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  123. Hope the Eagles and Chip Kelly get exposed this year.

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  124. It's no butt fumble that's for sure.

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  125. I love how the guy's body language appears to be saying "What the Hell, man?!"

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  126. That's what I'm betting on. (The wager was one beer.)

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  127. Miami have signed Cortland Finnegan to shore up their secondary!

    /gives up 50 yard gain
    /adds to it with a stupid penalty
    /I'm thoroughly depressed and the season is an hour old

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  128. He's on pace for the greatest season in any sport ever!

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  129. Fantasy Fumbles!

    I have Shane Vereen and Lamar Miller on 1 of 3 fantasy teams. They both have scored a TD. I have both on the bench.

    Woot.

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  130. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:56 AM

    Fuck you Big Ben

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  131. Stranger in the AlpsSeptember 7, 2014 at 11:57 AM

    Texas A&M alumnus. The hometown team.


    I agree just on principle.

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  132. Since you're giving him consent he's no longer interested.

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  133. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:57 AM

    Yeah I feel bad for those stuck with the matchup

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  134. He looks awful

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  135. Possibly the least accurate QB in the NFL

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  136. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:57 AM

    WILL YOU STOP!

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  137. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:58 AM

    Brady to Gronk, DOUBLE TD FANTASY POINTS

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  138. The Browns are embarrassing. I hate living in this city in the Fall with all the morons trying to constantly defend their awfulness.

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  139. I love the extra little hit Texans' #28 gives out, a textbook case of "accidentally on purpose".

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  140. But hey, LeBron!


    (That joke was funnier when LeBron wasn't back).

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  141. Pats vs 49ers in the Superbowl dog

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  142. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 11:59 AM

    Red Zone. + breakfast burritos = win at life

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  143. The CFL banned the "flag-tossing" motion this year and I wish the NFL would do the same.

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  144. Miami is getting spanked

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  145. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 12:00 PM

    I hate it. Every goddamn incompletion

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  146. The Ben TD pass is easily going to the best play of the week.

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  147. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 12:01 PM

    They're already in mid season form

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  148. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 12:01 PM

    I hate when no one brings down that fat fuck

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  149. NE always gives a team some hope...and then ruthlessly crushes those dreams.

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  150. LOL

    Their D and QB are terrible

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  151. Picked up that kid Wheaton in fantasy. Of course I bench him week 1 though

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  152. Ugh...I hate the Skins.

    Ball on the 2, let's give the ball to our fullback instead of Morris. Fuck you!

    I have Morris on 1 of my 3 teams.

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  153. I've counted 3 separate occasions so far where we gave up a first down because someone fell over.

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  154. You're forgetting Colin Kaepernick's 80 yard touchdown run where he pauses to fuck Tony Romo's girlfriend so hard she wakes up in a hospital with no memory of what happened. And, yes, it was consensual.

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  155. They're a team worth cheering for. The Clowns aren't.

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  156. Someone missed a 50 yd. FG.


    Guess we're not ready to break up the Jags just yet.

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  157. Pretty clear push-off by Roddy White there.

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  158. Kind of weird seeing Buffalo ahead. Experience tells me they'll find a way to blow it.

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  159. all dees touchdowns

    dat RedZone

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  160. Lamar Miller just fumbled so hard his shoe flew 15 yards. He fumbled his SHOE.

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  161. LOL at Miami fumbling again

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  162. Foles gets picked in the end zone... What the fuck is going on in Philly?

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  163. I am rude, good afternoon ladies and gents!

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  164. If even JACKSONVILLE has figured out the snap offense, they are fucked.

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  165. Still counts!


    I have Ryan and White on 1 of my 3 teams. Doubling up!

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  166. These HTC One commercials with Cortana is making me consider getting it...

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  167. Meanwhile, my favourite CFL team has score 17 unanswered points and leads 17-7 in a game I've barely watched.

    I fucking HATE how the CFL schedules games against the NFL. Completely retarded.

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  168. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 12:11 PM

    DESCRIBE WHAT MARTELLUS BENNETT LOOKS LIKE

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  169. Fuck. Spoke too soon!

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  170. Does Canada love the NFL so much? If not, it's not a bad decision.

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  171. No one here saw Antonio Brown karate kick a punter in the face?

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  172. Unopposed, they draw close to equal numbers. But there's no reason this game couldn't have been played on Saturday.

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  173. Browns getting their cheeks CLAPPED today. Too bad I had to bench Cam Newton and elected to start Hoyer over Fitzpatrick. WHAT WAS I THINKING?

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  174. Pats and Dolphins

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  175. Switched to the Indians game.

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  176. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 12:13 PM

    I started the Browns D. It's not working out.

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  177. Almost a Miami TDo

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  178. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 12:13 PM

    Lol Geno missed a wide open Decker in the end zone

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  179. Tannehill did the same to Wallace

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  180. Blocked Punt returned for TD. Good job Skins for giving that up...

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  181. Toby Gerhart: 10 carries, 17 yards.


    He makes 2013 Ray Rice look like Barry in his prime.

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  182. Also, Cincinnati appears to be allergic to the end zone.

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  183. So did I. I also have NE and WAS as my other DEFs.

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  184. Hell yeah Houston. Blocked punt for a TD.

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  185. My god is Tannehill awful

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  186. Doesn't help that he has to throw to that idiot Wallace.

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  187. I am having major concerns with Jamaal Charles in fantasy. He's not doing well.

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  188. http://deadspin.com/antonio-brown-introduces-the-front-heel-kick-to-the-nfl-1631667427



    Holy shit. How is that not an ejection?

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  189. He had Wallace open in the end zone but threw it way too close to the sidelines

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  190. Chiefs and Rams games should be considered a form of child abuse

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  191. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 7, 2014 at 12:20 PM

    BRANDON COOKS, MY NINJA

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