The SmarK Rant for Monday Night RAW – 06.26.95
Y’all can go to hell if you think I’m redoing King of the Ring. Sorry, but even I have my limits. In a roster note, IRS was done after King of the Ring and retired to become a road agent…until WCW promptly signed him for their new show. Whoops.
Live from Danville, PA. These shows have certainly been an education in learning new shitty towns in the US that I’ve never heard of before.
Your hosts are Vince McMahon & Shawn Michaels, since Jerry Lawler is still selling the beating from Bret Hart the night before.
The Smoking Gunns v. The Black Phantom & Jason Arendt
The Gunns double-team Arendt with a neckbreaker and finish him with the Sidewinder at 1:30.
Meanwhile, Jerry Lawler goes to visit his dentist to get the taste of his own feet out of his mouth…Isaac Yankem DDS. Lawler points out that Yankem used to be a wrestler under an assumed name, so they not only tied in the Bret storyline to Jacobs’ debut, but Lawler also explained how a dentist could be a wrestler!
We recap last night’s King of the Ring show, including Sid running away from Diesel like a coward to build up yet another rematch between them. Did they not even understand what got him over in the first place?
Skip Bodydonna v. Scott Taylor
Vince and Shawn just talk right over Sunny’s promo and then throw to Barry Didinsky for some t-shirt shilling. And they wonder why no one ever got over. Taylor fires away to start, but Skip hits an enzuigiri and stops to do jumping jacks. Taylor dropkicks him out and baseball slides him, but Skip pulls him out and splashes him off the top rope to take over. Back in, top rope rana finishes at 2:10.
In Your House 2 Report with Todd. The main event is already signed as noted earlier, with Diesel defending against Sid in a lumberjack match that no sane human being could care about since they’ve already killed off Sid’s aura and character.
Man Mountain Rock v. Phil Apollo
Thankfully, MMR has moved on past the pain of losing his guitar and is rocking out again. Rock tosses Apollo around and finishes with the WHAMMY BAR at 1:00.
King Mabel v. Kenny Kendall.
This is what I hated about this period so much – the previous night at the PPV, the entire crowd turned on the product, chanting for ECW during the big Mabel coronation match and then violently rejecting him as a top guy by throwing garbage at him during the crowning. So do they change the direction or even keep him off TV for a couple of weeks to take the wrong kind of heat off him? Nope, just throw him out and shove him down our throats even harder because FUCK YOU. No one cares about Sid v. Diesel in the main event? FUCK YOU, here’s a lumberjack match between them. Don’t want to cheer for Savio Vega? FUCK YOU, here’s four matches with him and then a main event on RAW. If I could have watched Nitro in 1995, I would have switched in a heartbeat, too, and I was BOYCOTTING WCW due to Hogan’s title reign at the time! They not only didn’t get their audience, they were openly disdainful of them and what they wanted to see (ie, Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels and no one else). Mabel pounds away in the corner and adds an enzuigiri, then beats on him on the floor while Shawn laughs off his KOTR elimination (“I guess I need to read the rulebook a bit more.”) and the belly to belly finishes at 2:30. This heel push was DOA from the start.
Meanwhile, Waylon Mercy tries his hand at being a lifeguard before his debut next week.
Meanwhile, the Hall of Fame inducts seven people, including Bill Murray doing a funny remote induction of George Steele.
Intercontinental title: Jeff Jarrett v. Savio Vega
I know what you’re thinking: “So Vega didn’t get over at King of the Ring and become the top babyface we expected, so why not shove him further down the fans’ throats? That’ll work, right?” Congrats, you’re qualified to book this awful show. Jarrett attacks and gets slugged down as a result, and an elbow off the middle rope gets two. Corner clothesline and he slugs away, then puts Jarrett on the floor as Shawn antagonizes the Roadie leading into the break. Back with Jarrett taking over with a neckbreaker, and a suplex gets two. Savio comes back with a suplex of his own and both guys are out. Vince constantly puts over Savio’s effort, but wrestling four matches and losing to a midcarder doesn’t make you a star, it makes you a LOSER. If he had put in that effort and lost out to, say, Undertaker or Shawn Michaels, then you’ve got a storyline. Beating the Roadie to get into the finals and then losing to half of Men on a Mission is not a storyline people can get behind. Shawn beats up the Roadie on the floor and Savio rolls up Jarrett for two, but Roadie comes in for the DQ at 7:30. I was thinking this was another abeyance situation, but I was obviously thinking of the Goldust non-switch in 96. Shawn’s involvement here set up his IC title shot at IYH2 to finally put Jarrett’s title reign out of its misery. **
Next week: Bam Bam Bigelow v. Sid! Why would you even book that on TV? Everything after the post-WM show has just been a big ball of shit rolling downhill faster and faster.
But what if Flair had never shown, and what do you do about the promise of giving Sid the main event spot?
ReplyDeleteAuckland Air is a mighty fine airline
ReplyDeleteIm guess I must be in a canoe paddling my way back to the states...
ReplyDeleteJoey Abs and Gangrel teaming in the opener?
ReplyDeleteYeah, me too.
ReplyDeleteThat fucking Trunk Barlow can't clean worth a shit
Garea took all my money when I passed out during the resthold seminar...
ReplyDeleteHe invested it wisely.
ReplyDeleteHope the My Pillow takes off for your sake
I not only attended KOTR 1995 but I purchased IYH 2. I have never heard of Danville, PA.
ReplyDeleteSake?! Am I stopping over in Japan for a few drinks?
ReplyDeleteOne problem with diesel/hogan as champ is that the little guy (savage/ hbk) will be seen as an underdog against them unless that guy is an über heel (like dibiase).
ReplyDeleteBam bam could have worked since he is a big guy; have him go on a epic I'm pissed at the world because I lost a football player type run. Have him destroy a bunch of people because he is so angry and then only diesel could stop him at summerslam.
Speaking of DX, am I the only one that remembers an angle they did where it was implied they were gang raping some chick? I'm being 100% serious here. But I have this image in my mind of them being in the lockerroom with some chick, and yada, yada. Like I wouldn't be surprised if that was suppose to be the implication since they were really pushing the envelope then, but then never brought it up again since rape is pretty touchy.
ReplyDeleteI sweat someone other than me has to remember this.
Mean street goth posse
ReplyDeleteIf I make it back to the states, maybe I can be a guest time keeper...
ReplyDeleteYJ3210 and Tony Garea vs. UMX on a future Raw
ReplyDeleteBook it.
Now Thats Good Cheese!
ReplyDeleteI think it's safe to say, no matter what, ANY ideas (within reason) we come up with would've been better than what WWE actually did. By within reason, I mean "Aldo Montoya, World Champion", but then who knows. Everything else was laughably bad.
ReplyDeleteWell is that any better than justin credible ecw champion?
ReplyDelete"The Gunns double-team Arendt with a neckbreaker and finish him with the Sidewinder at 1:30."
ReplyDeleteGeez, Scott isn't even trying here. Not that I blame him.
"This is what I hated about this period so much – the previous night at the PPV, the entire crowd turned on the product, chanting for ECW during the big Mabel coronation match and then violently rejecting him as a top guy by throwing garbage at him during the crowning. So do they change the direction or even keep him off TV for a couple of weeks to take the wrong kind of heat off him? Nope, just throw him out and shove him down our throats even harder because FUCK YOU. No one cares about Sid v. Diesel in the main event? FUCK YOU, here’s a lumberjack match between them. Don’t want to cheer for Savio Vega? FUCK YOU, here’s four matches with him and then a main event on RAW. If I could have watched Nitro in 1995, I would have switched in a heartbeat, too, and I was BOYCOTTING WCW due to Hogan’s title reign at the time! They not only didn’t get their audience, they were openly disdainful of them and what they wanted to see (ie, Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels and no one else)."
ReplyDeleteWhy does this all sound so familiar.......?
It's likely only going to get worse. The Raw product of 1995 (and 96), that is.
ReplyDeleteKenny Kendall was used in WCW a lot as a jobber.,,didn't know he worked in WWE too.
ReplyDeleteI think he said earlier that there's only a few left on the network, so unless they upload more he's switching to Nitro in a few days. I'd rather read that anyway, I never saw Nitro until the nWo angle was starting up, I saw these crappy Raws when they first aired.
ReplyDeleteIt's sad alright.
ReplyDeleteWait, I got it! It's a MAD LIB!
ReplyDelete"This is what I hated about this period so much – the previous night at the PPV, the entire crowd turned on the product, chanting for ("boring"/CM Punk/local sports team) during the big (Kane/Orton/Big Show/other stiff) coronation match and then violently rejecting him as a top guy by throwing garbage at him during the crowning. So do they change the direction or even keep him off TV for a couple of weeks to take the wrong kind of heat off him? Nope, just throw him out and shove him down our throats even harder because FUCK YOU. No one cares about (John Cena/Brie Bella) v. (John Cena's Challenger of the Month/Nikki Bella) in the main event? FUCK YOU, here’s a lumberjack match between them. Don’t want to cheer for (Roman Reigns/other overrated jerk)? FUCK YOU, here’s four matches with him and then a main event on RAW. If I could have watched (Impact) in (2014), I would have switched in a heartbeat, too, and I was BOYCOTTING (TNA) due to (Dixie Carter fuckwittery) at the time! They not only didn’t get their audience, they were openly disdainful of them and what they wanted to see (ie (Daniel Bryan/Dean Ambrose/Cesaro/Dolph Ziggler/other glass ceiling victim))"
That game was fun!
True Story: As a kid, I was a HUGE Mabel fan, and so I was happier than a pig in shit to hear Vince cry "King Mabel! King Mabel!" on Scramblevision. I was in disbelief (I mean, he wasn't even really getting a solid PUSH at the time), but happy as balls.
ReplyDeleteThat's Mister E Mahn's job.
ReplyDeleteBreak it.
ReplyDeleteMabel could still have been elevated here by just going over Taker, due to more blatant interference by Kama, but he didn't have to win the tournament... He was part of a joke face tag team, that is why no one took him seriously. Had Mabel come in with a different name (Viscera/BDV) or just the Harlem Knights gimmick and not been pissing around in low card cartoon tag matches (or debuted around this time like Savio) he would have been over.
ReplyDeleteI honestly want a doc on jobbers over the years. You can't tell me it wouldn't be interesting.
ReplyDelete1996 is a million times better than 95.
ReplyDeleteFor sure Diesel needed a better heels to go up against. Sid was over and established, but they booked him poorly (Sid could have even been a surprise winner of Rumble'95, as strange as it sounds, he was more established as a main event player than Shawn at that point). They also still had Yokozuna, whom they never bothered using to put over Diesel (better than Mabel).
ReplyDeleteBut maybe have been million dollar Luger all along (reverse the stupid Tatanka swerve). It wasn't quite HBK's time to win the '95 Rumble. KOTR'95 or Rumble '96 absolutely. So Luger was well established, not totally broken, turn him heel at SS'94, it would have got over, and DiBiase would have a legit contender in his stable; perhaps it could have been Luger to take the title from Bret (they never did have Bret vs Luger on PPV, which would have drawn) and build up Diesel more naturally (as in winning Rumble'95) to take out Luger at Mania. If not and Diesel still gets his hot-shot win then heel Luger wins Rumble. DiBiase's stable is seen as a huge threat rather than a joke (especially with addition of Sid after WM). Do I like Luger/Diesel as a Wrestlemania match, not really; but HBK was just getting to main event status at that point and if they were dead set on Diesel as babyface champ, then probably best for Shawn not to suck his heat away. But might have all been simpler just to follow the crowd and turn Diesel heel early, HBK wins KOR and takes over as champ at Summerslam. Would not have felt as much of a forgone conclusion as waiting all the way to WMXII, when many fans were already sick of Vince's fan pandering HBK.
Yeah, and Jerry Flynn was on a show before this!
ReplyDeleteIn the bookers' defense (but seriously, fuck the bookers here), it's REALLY hard to tell the difference between Heel Heat and "The Wrong Kind of Heat". You generally have to wait until the ratings or buyrates suffer. SummerSlam, naturally, was our indication that Mabel wasn't getting the right kind of heat.
ReplyDeleteAgreed, Jake vs Savage was where they were building and Flair could have lost to Hogan with the problem of the WWF Title on a "retiring" Hulkster... BUT as much as I loved Jake v Savage and heel Jake... I do not want to lose the greatness of Royal Rumble '92 and Flair's victory there.
ReplyDeleteKeep Hogan vs Taker at SSeries... Hogan wins (with the Tuesday in Texas finish). Jake was aligned with Taker, so he could have taken on Hogan at Tuesday in Texas and won there... But as I said above, I still want '92 Rumble. So, keep it as it was... Maybe have Hogan cost Flair the Title to Savage at SNME in Feb'92 and keep Hogan vs Flair at WM, and Jake vs Savage gets its' proper Wrestlemania blow-off (Taker fights Sid a few years earlier than and Warrior returns in that match instead?). Then you don't have to rush the great Savage/Flair "She was mine be before yours" Elizabeth angle, it can headline Summerslam. Flair wins, Savage regains at Rumble, Bret wins Rumble, Savage puts Bret over at X to face new monster heel Yokozuna after Wrestlemania... But getting carried away and way ahead of myself...Ha!
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure Balls Mahoney wasn't happy with Mabel.
ReplyDeleteStuart and I are branching out to form a new tag team: Silent But Violent.
ReplyDeleteWhat's so bad about booking Sid v Bam Bam? I know the match sucked, but the storyline was building up to that match. And I think the match was designed to give Sid some credibility for the PPV match, but it was too late to do any good by then.
ReplyDeleteTGGI
ReplyDeleteDid You Know: The reason Mabel was made King was because he got blown up walking down the aisle and up the steps to get into the ring.
ReplyDeleteWhat does that mean? Google search provides nothing.
ReplyDeleteMaybe he was just happy that another fat guy got a push.
ReplyDeleteThis Guy Gets It
ReplyDeleteHow ironic...
TGGI? That means This Guy Gets It, I believe.
ReplyDeleteYep, this was in fall of 1999, when heel DX was feuding with Vince, Test, and Stephanie. I forget the exact setup, but at the end of the show, Test and/or Vince were in the ring watching on the Titantron, as DX had a camera in their locker room, showing, I believe it was Billy Gunn, and not Triple H, on top of a woman that was supposed to be Stephanie. I think you only saw her legs or something, but he was definitely implied to be violating her.
ReplyDeleteThe next week I think it was revealed that DX had an actress playing that part, so it was not actually implied rape, just pretend implied rape. I don't remember if there was a massive shitstorm of bad press over the angle or not, but of course mere weeks later, if I have the timing correct, there was the Triple H/Stephanie wedding video, where of course Triple H implies that he drugged Steph, married her, and then had sex with her repeatedly while still in the unconscious state. So if they had gotten in any heat over the first rape story, they sure didn't seem to care as they immediately followed it up with another one.
Your acronym is getting X-Pac Heat from me.
ReplyDelete"I worked for years to remain pasty and thin while on the road. It cost me my marriage and the respect of my children."
ReplyDeleteHow is '96 Raw better? At least in 95 there was the occassional great match. We didn't really have that on the '96 Raws.
ReplyDeleteDoing Diesel/Bam Bam in a superface match would have been the most boring superface match in history. But the rest are fine choices.
ReplyDeleteI meant it as a compliment!
ReplyDeleteNow you see why I don't give those out very often.
I was thinking about how they could book a Diesel/Shawn with both guys playing superfaces. The buildup would involve both guy saying they respect each other and all that wishy washy babyface stuff and how they want to see who the better man is since their WM11 match was marred in controversy. Then when they do their match, have Shawn kick out of Diesel's jacknife and a desperate Nash ends up whacking Shawn with a chair to win the match. Then the next night Diesel could start the tease of his heel turn by apologising for his actions etc.
ReplyDeleteLike this?
ReplyDeletehttp://www.jobbersthemovie.com/about/
Hah- don't worry about it. Now that I know you were complimenting me, it's cool. I just couldn't figure out what you meant at first.
ReplyDeleteDoesn't matter when you're a LEGEND
ReplyDeleteActually looking forward to IYH 2 just because of how much more over Shawn was than the rest of the company. Fans went bonkers for him and were fairly silent for everyone else.
ReplyDeleteIts hard to be the smilin' white meat babyface when your a 7 foot monster with a smart-ass personality. Nash proved after he lost the title to Bret what an awesome heel he could be.
ReplyDeleteWhat I don't understand is, that they used the Lugers and Bulldogs and Owen Harts and Jeff Jarretts for the IYHs events but not for King of the Ring and Summer Slam.
ReplyDeleteKOTR and Summer Slam were still big events back then and they made bullshit cards and stories despite having much better worker on the roster.
A better King of the Ring PPV could have been like this:
First Round
Undertaker vs Tatanka (Kama interfers)
British Bulldog vs Bam Bam Bigelow (Owen comes to help Bam Bam but Bulldog can cheat to win, looks like Bulldog is still against Owen)
Shawn Michaels vs Yokozuna
Lex Luger vs Owen Hart (Bulldog turns Heel by helping Owen!)
Half Final Matches
British Bulldog vs Tatanka
Shawn Michaels vs Owen Hart
Kiss my Foot Match
Bret Hart vs Jerry Lawler (for gods sake end this feud!)
King of the Ring Final Match
Shawn Michaels vs British Bulldog
World Title
Diesel vs Sid
or so
Yep, exactly. Seems like "Real heel heat" is when it's a wrestler your like, and "Wrong heat" is when it's a wrestler you don't like. I absolutely don't blame them for going on with it, WWE did lots of dumb moves in 1995, but I don't think that one is one of it.
ReplyDeleteIt actually had a very solid mid card, Totally disagree with SummerSlam being underwhelming as a whole.
ReplyDeleteBulldog turned shortly before Summer Slam. Why not use him as King of the Ring? Or Lex Luger?
ReplyDeleteThe show sucked balls big time because most of the wrestler sucked: Hunter Hearst sucked, Bob Holly sucked, the Skip gimmick sucked, Blu Twins sucked, Smoking Gunns sucked, Kama wasn't gonna put asses in the seats, Isac Yankem sucked and King Mabel was the biggest sucker.
ReplyDeleteYou might be a troll or a gimmick or Something but I agree with your sentiments.
ReplyDeleteThen they must have been doing something right!
ReplyDeleteI compare it to if it's a storyline they like, then it's called "Booking", and if it's one they don't like, then it's "Writing", and they should go back to "Booking".
ReplyDeleteIf you have an opinion they don't agree with you're a troll, but if you share the same opinion you're an alright person.
ReplyDeleteBah. Hulk roars like me.
ReplyDeleteTruck = jobber.
ReplyDeleteThese un-inspired RAW main events remind me too much of what we get today. Who the hell gets excited for the rematch of the ** star Roman/Randy SS match?
ReplyDeleteNot in America. Which is where it actually matters.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure where this revisionist history where Bret was a huge draw and they took the title off of him for shits and giggles comes from, but it does make me laugh.
ReplyDeleteI don't think it has to do with differing opinions, as much as it has to do with the majority of things (it appears) you two talk about are generalizations of other's opinions.
ReplyDeleteI don't see Vince talk much about what he thought of a particular segment, as much as he talks about what other people thought of a particular segment. This is why people feel that both of you are "troll'ish".
This is just my guess though.
The position is filled.
ReplyDeleteI've tried. I got ridiculed for enjoying the big show yesterday. Look at what people are saying to Andy because he dares
ReplyDeleteTo like cena more than Austin. Heck, speak your mind about not believing d bry could beat Brock lesnar and you can just see people explode with rage.
This still might be better than the event four years later.
ReplyDeleteYeah, but who cares though? It's more interesting hearing your opinion on an angle even if it differs from mine, then hearing you ridicule or complain about some general "they".
ReplyDeleteDid You Know: Jack Swagger has more victories over Cain Velasquez than Brock Lesnar.
ReplyDeleteWell, I don't blame them for trying someone new, but even as a Mabel fan I don't think that was the right call. I think it must have been pretty clear EVENTUALLY that it wasn't working.
ReplyDeleteVKM sold this show on the premise of HBK facing Taker in the second round. Otherwise, why bother putting them in that bracket together? I specifically was excited for the prospect of HBK-Taker when I got the show back in 1995, because I couldn't imagine a scenario where either HBK or Taker lost to their respective opponents.
ReplyDeleteYou got me, Vince.
Does America have a huge "Cuban" community that supported Razor Ramon? I never like Savio, but Vince taking a chance on a wrestler isn't a bad thing...
ReplyDeleteDid you know: You have as many victories over Cain Velasquez as Brock Lesnar.
ReplyDeleteas said before: a babyface run might even have worked fine.... IF they let him keep his "badass" persona that he had as a heel (of course they hadn't realized it back then, but in hindsight we know that "anti-heroes" were going to become the biggest thing in wrestling").
ReplyDeleteI have no idea what you expect from a weekly free Raw show. Cena vs Brock? How is Roman/Randy not a perfectly fine Raw main event?
ReplyDeleteexactly. if we're going just by "the fans throw garbage which means they don't buy into this angle"-logic the WCW should have dropped the nWo angle instantly after the Bash at the Beach (or at least not run it as the main angle on the shows).
ReplyDeleteYou might be in a minority. The homogenization of opinions seems to be important to the iwc in general. I love to argue and defend opinions too! I just get sick of having to defend myself for having said opinions. Ya kno?
ReplyDeleteI don't get that argument as well. wouldn't it be even MORE damaging if people reject the angle involving the guy the company has presented as the top star for the last two years?
ReplyDelete(and isn't this one of the things that made the Austin heel turn fail?)
Reigns = "overrated jerk". really?
ReplyDeleteYeah, I get that.
ReplyDeleteBut I do feel like the opinions aren't as homogenized as it seems. There are certain people on here that you know will take one stance, but then there are some of us who watch and say "some things suck, some things don't."
"it's REALLY hard to tell the difference between Heel Heat and "The Wrong Kind of Heat"."
ReplyDeleteand for us watching it's even IMPOSSIBLE.
OK, you've outed me. My name is Jesse Fujarczyk.
ReplyDeleteNeeds more Strike Force 2.0.
ReplyDeleteMattindeed & a wrestling buddy doll of Tito Santana.
It's more those that are negative vocalize their opinions the loudest and most often. It's like the whole "I stopped watching raw on such and such but here is my opinion on the show based on what I read on the Internet." Crowd.
ReplyDelete"They not only didn’t get their audience, they were openly disdainful of them and what they wanted to see."
ReplyDeleteThat sounds awfully familiar.
So basically....you don't care for jobber.
ReplyDeleteHe expects the ghost of Chris Benoit against the returning Daniel Bryan in the ultimate face-heel matchup leading to an eight star match. Every week!
ReplyDelete