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The Smark Rant for WCW Monday Nitro–09.25.95

The SmarK Rant for WCW Monday Nitro – 09.25.95

FINALLY! And the shows have all been renumbered to make sense now, too. Of course, wouldn’t you know that I did the past few episodes in one marathon session because I was going to be out of town for a few days and didn’t want to kill anyone by missing a day. And once I had already got three episodes and the WW3 repost in the can and pre-posted, THEN someone e-mails me being all “Dude, the 9/25 Nitro is finally up!” And of course I’m not anywhere that I can actually access the Network to even check it out for myself. So now, at long last, before I have the chance to change my mind and do a stupid running joke to milk it for weeks, the missing episode of Nitro.

Try not to poop yourself with excitement.

LIVE from nowhere they wanted to advertise, apparently.

Your hosts are Eric Bischoff, Bobby Heenan & Mongo

Alex Wright v. Disco Inferno

The Boogie Knights collide for the first time! I think this would have been Disco’s wrestling debut on Nitro. I would like to point out here that his theme music is one of the few where they nailed the style and gimmick perfectly on the first try. Disco tosses him, but Wright comes back in with a missile dropkick and a leg lariat for two. Wright dumps him again and follows with a plancha, but Disco catches him with a stungun. Now here’s an interesting tactic by the announcers to deal with football instead of passive-aggressively booking things during halftime: Mongo just comes out and says “You know San Francisco is gonna win the football game, so don’t even bother watching!” They’re even trying to give away the finishes of the FOOTBALL GAMES! When did they lose those big brass balls? Disco controls and goes up, but Wright dropkicks him down and wins a slugfest, following with a back elbow for two. Disco goes for the neckbreaker, but Wright gets a backslide for the pin at 4:05 and Disco is already on a losing streak. Non-stop action here. **1/2

Meanwhile, Hogan is rocking the neck brace but hasn’t gone black yet. Because once you go black, you often have trouble reverting to your previous life choices. Or something. Anyway, Hogan challenges that big, stinky, nasty, wart-infested Giant to a title match for Halloween Havoc, where he will be thusly buried next to the corpse of his father. Wait, so Hogan killed Andre the Giant in Detroit now? That’s messed up even for him.

Last week, Lex Luger and Randy Savage get into a spat.

Randy Savage calls out Lex Luger, and Lex answers, wanting RESPECT. So next week, they have a match where Luger puts his career on the line against Savage. Well Savage was certainly due to win one of those.

Kurasawa v. Sgt. Craig Pittman

Kurasawa throws kicks to put the Sarge on the floor, then pulls up the mats and suplexes him onto the hardwood. That would suck. Back in, Kurasawa goes to work on the arm, but Pittman dumps him to catch a breather. They brawl on the floor and Pittman hauls him back in by the arm and follows with a belly to belly throw. Code Red armbar, but Kurasawa makes the ropes. He tries for his own armbar, but Pittman throws him to escape and Kurasawa finishes with a questionable pinfall off a bridged german suplex at 4:40. Didn’t seem like he was actually down for the three count. Whatever, it was an entertaining trainwreck of a match, with both guys throwing bombs without caring if they hit or not. **1/2

Brian Pillman and Arn Anderson are pretty sure that Flair isn’t gonna find a partner but they’re happy to kick the shit out of him all alone. Arn rightly points out that all the people Flair has been asking are people that he previously turned on and crippled, so it’s not surprising that they would tell him off. Plus now he doesn’t have Arn to back him up.

Meanwhile, on the beach, Randy Savage is randomly lifting weights and gets attacked by Kevin Sullivan. How do you even sneak up on someone on the BEACH? It would take like 2 minutes to get from the boardwalk out to where the weight set was!

Randy Savage v. Kevin Sullivan

Well, here’s the blowoff of this blood feud we just learned about before the commercial break. There’s certainly something to be said for efficiency. Zodiac attacks Savage on the floor to allow Sullivan to take control, and they brawl on the floor. Quite the fall for Beefcake, as he goes from main eventing Starrcade against Hogan to acting as Damien Sandow to Kevin Sullivan’s Miz. Also, I’ve probably mentioned this before, but Tom Zenk claims that the Zodiac Man was the gimmick they originally gave him before he told them to go get stuffed and just went by Z-Man instead. So they thought this gimmick was such a brilliant idea that they held onto it for four years before finding someone else to play it. Typical WCW stupidity, thinking that some jerk who runs around going “Yes! No! Yes! No!” would ever get over. I mean, REALLY NOW.

Come on.

As if.

Puh-lease.

Nig…well, you get the idea.

Back in the ring, Sullivan pounds away with the usual, but Savage gets a backdrop on the floor and stops to beat up Zodiac for the DQ at 3:00. SO MUCH FRINGE! ½* Poor Beefcake takes a Macho Elbow but the Giant heads out and chokeslams the bejeezus out of Savage. Even Frankie Lancaster and Mark Starr aren’t able to stop the path of Gigantic Rage! Bischoff is all “It’s Lex Lu…” before realizing that his timing was horribly off and catching himself. And indeed, Luger finally comes out to make the save after Alex Wright fails more horribly than usual. They’re even spoiling THEIR OWN SHOW! These guys can’t be stopped! Man, they did an awesome job of making the Giant into a big deal in a hurry, although after their “clever” booking of Havoc they had no real plan to follow through with it.

Lex Luger v. Meng

Luger is tenderized by the previous segment, so Meng runs out and kicks his ass further, but Bischoff has an update: Hulk Hogan will be in Denver next week! Now they’re spoiling NEXT WEEK’S SHOW! Meng chokes away and gets a piledriver for two, then goes back to the choking because it was working pretty well. Suplex gets two. And now the dreaded VULCAN NERVE PINCH and he stomps away after Lex somehow escapes. To the chinlock, but Luger fights out and makes the comeback. Sadly, Meng hits him with the LOADED THUMB OF DEATH to finish at 6:45. So this was a match that happened. DUD

The announcers wrap it up, and obviously this version is from the WWE Classics on Demand library because Bobby Heenan talks about how Luger jumped from the WWF, and they bleep out the “F”. So back in 2006, even on another promotion’s show, they were still censoring the WWF name. What, was the Fund gonna go back in time and retroactively sue WCW?

Next week: Well we’ve already covered that. Duh. Back to November 1995 again tomorrow.

Really liked this show, by the way.  Fun and breezy AND easy to mock at the same time. That’s a tricky tightrope to walk and WCW pulled it off here. 

Comments

  1. I'm trying to think of a WWE equivalent for even a B-Show. This would be like Battleground headlined by Rob Van Dam & Chris Jericho vs. Bray Wyatt & Luke Harper

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  2. Tuiasosopo!!!! He was the Raiders backup for like 5 years. Surprised he snuck in a start.


    Wow I forgot about Collins, Campbell and Culpepper.

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  3. Didn't he renounce his TNA fan boy status in the Daily Update thread today?

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  4. A minion's work is never done.

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  5. It's not a bad idea...you just can't do it for your biggest show of the year.

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  6. It's like Starrcade 95

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  7. In the RAW thread. I found it. Who am I gonna make fun of now?

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  8. It says a lot that for their Wrestlemania, they didn't even feel the need to bother booking their world champion.

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  9. I don't know what everyone is bitching about! That right there is 7 main events any where in the country.......just not this country. Kenya maybe?

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  10. Ah it was in the Raw Live Thread. He trashed the BFG card and then said "WWF1987 • 5 hours ago

    So I think I'm officially done being a TNA front runner. Sad to see this day."

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  11. You can make fun of me for being a Raider fan.

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  12. "Try not to poop yourself with excitement."



    I did pee a little

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  13. Certainly not Japan.

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  14. If I couldn't make it to the SSW Fall Spectacular, I'm sure as hell not making it to this.

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  15. I love this description on Wikipedia:

    "Bound for Glory will feature professional wrestling matches that involve different wrestlers from pre-existing scripted feuds and storylines. Wrestlers portray villains, heroes, or less distinguishable characters in the scripted events that build tension and culminate in a wrestling match or series of matches."

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  16. It's the 2008 All-Pro Team!

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  17. CruelConnectionNumber2September 30, 2014 at 12:36 AM

    And San Francisco LOST the football game! Swerve!

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  18. CruelConnectionNumber2September 30, 2014 at 12:43 AM

    Why is little heel Velvet Sky facing big heel Havok. No one on this show could draw a nickel.

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  19. TNA might as well just pack it in and call it a day. The brand is just irreversibly tainted. This isn't an exciting card, but I think they could book Austin vs. Cena vs. Punk vs. Hogan vs. God and it wouldn't draw and would be crapped on by everyone. On the possible plus side, however, Jarrett's new promotion will, apparently, have their first show in January. Who knows? Maybe they will be a true alternative to WWE.

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  20. The problem with TNA is that they've burnt so many bridges in the last dozen years that nobody trusts them any more.


    None of the indy guys, who they SHOULD have been appealing to, even look at them any more. Imagine a TNA with Generico, Steen, ACH, Ricochet, the Bucks, and a butt-load of others... that's the TNA that SHOULD have been. Sure, Punk is generally a dick who wouldn't have worked with them, but are you telling me that, had they worked right, they couldn't have had Danielson before WWE got a chance with him?


    It's a shame to see them start to realize that dream around 2005-2006, just to flush it all away within a few years -- strangely enough after the hiring of Christian and Angle, two people that COULD have put them over the top if they were worked into programs, and not just had all attention focused on them.


    It makes the resurgences in 2009 and 2012 even harder to watch, because it seems like they KNOW what makes good wrestling, but fight tooth and nail to avoid doing it. Hell, 2012 had three of their best (Styles, Daniels, and Kazarian) tied up in a horrid storyline and it was STILL an awesome year for them that had people praising them -- that was like Attitude-era level insanity there (what with them having some of the dumbest storylines ever, but the other ones being so good that the stupidity was forgiven), but somehow, they lost all that good-will.


    As a longtime supporter (I can't even really say "fan" for about half that time), even I gave up on them for good in 2013. TNA will always be the "one that should have been", repeating the mistakes of others and ending up with the exact same result.


    (As for BFG, the card will likely have some good matches, but to what end? They really do need to pull the plug.)

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  21. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomerySeptember 30, 2014 at 2:02 AM

    I know it will get really, really bad once I cross into later years, but I'm really having a blast re-visiting these old 1995 Nitros and PPVs. I don't even miss RAW with the Network content available.

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  22. Less distinguishable characters. That's TNA alright.

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  23. As good and important as the nWo era was, I
    do wish this period of WCW had lasted longer than it did. The fun wacky Nitro
    really only lasts from here to about April. Once Hogan leaves it really just
    becomes dull until Scott Hall shows up.

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  24. They think Ryota Hama will remind us of Rikishi. They think we know Muta from NWA '89. They think we know Tajiri from early 2000's WWE. They think we know Kaz Hayashi from WCW's Jung Dragons. They think we know Sakamoto from the Tensai run. They think we know Minoru Tanaka from ECW.

    They have no idea Minoru Tanaka isn't Masato Tanaka.

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  25. MINORU TANAKA~! was the man in New Japan Pro Wrestling back in the day. CROSS ARM BREAKER~!

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  26. Without the awesome triangle match and world title match.

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  27. Yeah, it's not like they're starting a forum or anything stupid like that!

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  28. Actually I think, if you add just ONE good main event match, the card wouldn't look so bland.

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  29. If I were Marcus Mariota, I'd go back to Oregon for my senior year instead of going into the draft and likely winding up in Oakland.

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  30. "Imagine a TNA with Generico, Steen, ACH, Ricochet, the Bucks, and a butt-load of others"

    Yes, we call it PWG, and it's worth every penny to take a vacation in Reseda and watch it live!

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  31. "Yep Mode" ABeyAnce1©September 30, 2014 at 5:36 AM

    Oh wow, Im legit shocked at this news.

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  32. So TNA is doing a crossover with the Japanese version of TNA. Who in their right mind would pay $40 for this?

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  33. Charismatic eNegro Jef VinsonSeptember 30, 2014 at 6:16 AM

    I will watch this through my perfectly legal stream.

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  34. Charismatic eNegro Jef VinsonSeptember 30, 2014 at 6:16 AM

    This card needs Angle in the main event

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  35. Charismatic eNegro Jef VinsonSeptember 30, 2014 at 6:17 AM

    What? Because he's not booked?

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  36. Charismatic eNegro Jef VinsonSeptember 30, 2014 at 6:18 AM

    "Something Something Wrestling" (AKA a made up organization.

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  37. Punk did work with them when he was still in ROH. Then they started screwing with him in their typical TNA ways. I can't remember the full story, but I think they started to tell him he couldn't work ROH anymore and he ended up picking ROH over them.

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  38. That is my current dream vacation.

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  39. *JaWalrus Ruffles

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  40. Yep, plus there was at least a big "WCW vs NJPW" pride thing, where the WCW guys really took it seriously. This is absolutely nothing like that.

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  41. As I said yesterday...

    TNA: Bound for Bankruptcy

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  42. And to this day I can't understand why TNA didn't try to cash in on Punk's WWE popularity by putting all of his TNA matches on a DVD (it was only like 12 matches or so) and selling it as "CM Punk: The TNA Years"

    Would've at least sold a few hundred copies.

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  43. No time for that. They put all their energy and focus on signing ex WWE guys instead.

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  44. Knowing TNA's money troubles, I wouldn't be surprised if the TNA talent flies to Japan, does the show, and then are told that they don't have enough money to fly them home.

    At least they can get as many free jackets as they want at Ribera Steakhouse!

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  45. What happens in April?

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  46. So about this time next year will we have to listen to Tommy Dreamer on Austin's podcast talking about how he had investors lined up to pay more than $100 million for TNA but Dixie nixed the whole thing?


    Because that's sort of like what Dreamer does.

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  47. "Hey Dixie, what's up with all the One Way plane tickets?"

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  48. Hogan leaves and kinda takes all the goofiness with him. I just
    remember the show becoming a lot less interesting then. I think the wrestling is still really good,
    and they start having longer matches, but it definitely becomes less fun than
    the early episodes.

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  49. If I followed Japanese wrestling and knew who any of those guys were, this would be a very interesting card just for the novelty and freshness factor. I know that if TNA did a crossover show with Mexico's CMLL or AAA (which I do follow), I'd pay to see it.

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  50. They can't, because their champion wasn't under a long-term contract and will likely be leaving after the show, so they already changed the title for a post-BFG show. And because Japan would shit all over them for pretending that the title change didn't happen until it airs, they decided to avoid it by not booking their champions at all.


    And then they booked an X title match. And my head exploded.

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  51. Don't make me put you in the penalty box again.

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  52. I'll just watch Starrcade 95 instead.

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  53. Makes me sad. I think TNA used the guys they did because they are known or popular in Japan.Still dumb that Roode, Lashley, Aries, Hardyes, Bram, Magnus, Eric Young, Gail Kim, Tary Terrell, etc. weren't used. This card looks like a bad One Night Only card. Only one match has any back story to it.

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  54. TNA and Wrestle-1 did a joint show in March for a One Night Only PPV taping and a Wrestle-1 PPV taping. The card for that show, known as Outbreak, shits ALL OVER the Bound For Glory card. Look at the One Night Only card then look at the BFG card:

    TNA World Heavyweight Championship
    Magnus vs. KAI

    TNA World Tag Team Championship
    Davey Richards & Eddie Edwards vs. Kaz Hayashi & Shuji Kondo vs. Robbie E & Jessie Godderz

    TNA X Division Championship
    Austin Aries vs. Seiya Sanada

    Singles Match
    Bobby Roode vs. Masakatsu Funaki

    Tag Team Match
    Christopher Daniels & Kazarian vs. Minoru Tanaka & Koji Kanemoto

    Singles Match
    Abyss vs. Yoshihiro Takayama

    Knockouts Match
    Gail Kim vs. Madison Rayne

    Six Man Tag Team Match
    Samoa Joe, Masayuki Kono & Rene Dupree vs. Keiji Mutoh, Rob Terry & mystery partner

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  55. I know I'm biased because I live in Chicago and have met Mongo (and he's a hell of a cool guy actually) but I don't find him as unbearable as other folks. Compared to other "guest" announcers like Mark Madden and Rob Bartlett, at least Mongo seems to care about the product, puts the storylines over, and even talks about how tough everyone is (even the heels). I'm with what the poster said below, I have been going back and watching these Nitros and the PPVs and enjoying the hell out of it.
    This episode I really liked, and Kurasawa/Pittman I thought was awesome. The crowd was hot for it too, despite being heel vs heel and no story attached. Kudos to Scott for going back and reviewing these again. I promise to try not to poop myself with excitement, though my irritable bowel syndrome may not cooperate.

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  56. That Bound for Glory card is just sad

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  57. Is Aries even still in TNA ?

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  58. Charismatic eNegro Jef VinsonSeptember 30, 2014 at 7:49 AM

    Are the Japanese wrestlers they have signed for BfG important in their own country?
    And isn't Joe injured?

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  59. Biggest news of the day. This had best be in the BOD Daily News Thread.

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  60. Considering the ex-ECW guys they keep hiring, they SHOULD know that last part.

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  61. Japanese - Check
    Slanty Eyes - Check
    Last Name Tanaka - Check
    "Okay lets get this guy out there to take some chairshots to the head and do his elbow"

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  62. This show has been on the PS3 version of the network for quite some time. I watched it in there and have been thinking this whole time, what is Scott talking about? The show is available and has been for a long time. This was one of the worst episodes so far actually.

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  63. No way that Jeff Hardy could get into the country with his drug history.

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  64. I'm a Saints fan. I can't make fun of anyone

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  65. Putrid. How do they promote this and expect their fans to be excited? KAZ HAYASHI! Wrestle 1 doesn't even appear to be the Japanese version of TNA. They're some hack indy promotion.

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  66. they are soo far ahead in tapings that bfg will have no consequence on storylines. smh.

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  67. Who is Minoru Tanaka?
    Tajiri being in the main event is just astounding.

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  68. Didn't the guy that started in Houston play for them last year? I can't believe I can't remember his name.

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  69. They're not being a Molester of Boys, either. (Unless you consider Rockstar Spud a boy...)

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  70. So... TNA gone done fucked up didn't they?

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  71. Actually, they kind of did.


    They advertised a bunch of his matches on their site.

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  72. Virgin squad attack! Form of angry Internet commenter who's life is so horrible he needs to mock others to feel better about himself. Shape of kbjone!

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  73. Charismatic eNegro Jef VinsonSeptember 30, 2014 at 9:44 AM

    Another thing: Wrestle-1 still has no titles of their own, right? So they can't even contribute a title match?

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  74. Charismatic eNegro Jef VinsonSeptember 30, 2014 at 9:47 AM

    As it is they'll have to go over in pet carriers.

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  75. NJPW, AJPW, NOAH, DDT.

    Off the top of my head, bigger Japanese promotions then wrestle-1

    I don't even follow Pyro.

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  76. That's the thing.

    Even the people I know who watch tons of Japanese wrestling don't know who the he'll most of those guys are

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  77. You can't have a big show in 2014 without Tommy Dreamer.

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  78. Don't forget how he sacrificed for TNA.

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