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Matt's Main Event Recap - 10/28/2014

Andy was supposed to write my recap. I'm assuming he's busy, so I will do it.

In any case, let's do this real quick.


We are LIVE(!) from Houston, TX!

Michael Cole, Byron Saxton...and JBL?! That's a lot of commentary for one hour...

Time for MizTV as out come Miz and Miz-dow. Miz welcomes us to MizTV and says that there was a tragedy on RAW -- he was robbed by the Usos and Twin Magic. Miz asks the crowd if they saw it. Crowd says, "no" because fuck The Miz. He says that he's lucky the ref still has a job. He knows people who can fire him -- but he won't get him fired. The Usos didn't really beat him or Miz-dow. He doesn't air his grievances without the other side, so he brings out The Usos. No Mark Henry, I guess. Hope they didn't kill that storyline. Crowd cheers for the Usos and Miz says, "My hand goes up, your mouths go shut."

Miz asks the Usos why they did what they did. Crowd chants for the Usos and The Miz tells them that they're being rude. Jey says they didn't do anything, they just beat the Miz's -- all while Jimmy imitates Jey ala Miz-dow. Miz: "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no...NO. Why did you steal a victory that belonged to me?" Jimmy: "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no...NO. NO!!! NO!!! NO!!!" Jimmy says they didn't steal anything from Miz. He says that Miz is an A-lister. Miz speaks and Miz-dow and the Usos ALL imitate Miz. He yells at them to stop mimicking him. Sandow stops and Miz says, "NOT YOU! THEM!" He says he wants a sequel fight right now. He says that there will be a different ending. He calls for a ref and referee Charles Robinson comes running down.

MATCH #1: The Miz & Damien Miz-dow vs. The Usos (Jimmy & Jey)
Miz and Jimmy start. First bit is your usual running attack tit-for-tat. Jimmy tags in Jey and it's a quick double-team with elbows. Miz comes back with a dropkick off an Irish Whip. Miz tags in Miz-dow -- then immediately tags himself back in. Jey hip-tosses him and tags in Jimmy who hits a double axehandle off the buckle and a chop. Miz comes back with a knee to the gut. Miz hits some stomps while Cole wants to discuss Marvel's Third Wave of films like he's podcasting. Miz hits a suplex and multiple stomps, then tells Miz-dow to stay back. Headlock by Miz. Jimmy gets to his feet and breaks, hitting a side suplex. Hot tag to Jey and it's a series of clotheslines. Jey clotheslines him out of the ring. Miz-dow joins in the fall and Jey hits a Flying Uso on Miz-dow as Miz bails. Jey turns to take care of Miz and gets kicked in the face...and we go to break? Wow. This match really doesn't need to be that long.

After break, Miz is stomping Jey. Jey comes back with chops but then gets whipped into the corner and Miz-lined. Miz goes top rope and hits a double axe-handle. Two count. Another headlock by Miz. Jey nearly has a roll-up off a knee-to-the-gut counter. Miz hits the back/neckbreaker combo and locks his legs, tagging in Miz-dow. Headlock by Miz-dow. Jey breaks and hits an Enzuguri. Hot tag to Jimmy and Miz and Jimmy hits a kick to the gut, uppercut and Samoan Drop. He goes for the Rikishi Splash but Miz moves. Jimmy hits a Corkscrew Moonsault for two. Jimmy tries a Superkick and there's a series of counters. Roll-up by Miz. Two count. Miz-dow gets involved and Miz ends up clotheslining Jimmy to the mat. Jey tries Twin Magic again but the ref sees it this time. Jey says he didn't do anything, then points at the Miz's -- and then pull Twin Magic for the win at 11:45.
WINNERS: The Usos
RATING: **1/2. Essentially, a shaggy dog match just to pull the same trick it pulled on RAW. It was funnier the first time.

Komen hates cancer. So please buy WWE's shit.

TONIGHT: Sheamus fights Bo Dallas.

NEXT: We get a look at Steph's offer to John Cena from RAW.

When we come back, we get a look at Cena vs. The Authority from RAW, as promised.

ON SMACKDOWN: It's a Halloween Special. And all the Divas will be in costumes in a Battle Royal. The ratings should be through the roof.

MATCH #2: Paige vs. Natalya (w/ Tyson Kidd)
Come on. Either they're divorcing or they're not. Tyson joins the booth as Paige puts Head Scissors on Nattie. Nattie comes back with a headlock while JBL calls Kidd "Steadman". Natties shoulderblocks Paige on a run and rolls her up for two. She tries to wrap Paige up but Paige gets to the ropes, then forearms Nattie in the head. Nattie comes back, slapping Paige and dumping her from the ring. Nattie comes to get her but Paige kicks her. Natties get in the ring on a 7-count from the ref. Paige headbutts her, then kicks her. Paige knees her in the stomach, then covers for two. She taunts Nattie and hits an abdominal stretch, shaking her, while mocking the fans doing the "NATTIE" chant. Nattie reverses it but Paige counters with a snapmare, then licks Nattie's face. The two start punching at one another but Paige wraps her up in an Octopus hold. Nattie gets to her feet but Paige falls on her for two. Paige tosses her into the ropes and its a clothesline by Nattie. She hits a German Suplex. Tyson: "Who taught her that? I wonder!" JBL: "Brock Lesnar?" Nattie tries the Sharpshooter but Paige dodges it and hits a Ram-Paige, getting a near fall. Paige tries a Sharpshooter but Nattie reverses it. Paige kicks her off and then wins with a weak roll-up at 7:04.
WINNER: Paige
RATING: **. Not too bad, really. The ending was weak and just felt like two people wrapping something up that was going on too long.

Suddenly, eyeballs and a Southern accent, saying "I will piece myself together with pieces of you." I'm guessing Luke Harper but the boys have no idea what the hell that was.

MATCH #3: Bo Dallas vs. WWE United States Champion Sheamus (non-title)
Dallas evades Sheamus a couple times to start and acts cocky. He puts Sheamus in an arm bar. Sheamus reverses and arm drags Sheamus to the mat. Side headlock into an Irish Whip and Dallas goes down via shoulderblock. Counters by both guys leads to a dropkick by Bo. Dallas takes a victory lap outside. He gets back in the ring and goes for a handshake and Dallas Ric Flairs him. He lunges at Sheamus after that but Sheamus takes him down. Dallas keeps evading Sheamus's holds and goes for another handshake. So Sheamus slaps him. Dallas rushes and Sheamus dumps him from the ring. He gets back in again but Sheamus clotheslines him outside the ring and hits Ten Beats. The fight moves outside. Sheamus tries to drag Dallas back into the ring but Dallas trips him while he's on the mat and then gets a two count. Dallas hits some knees and a headlock. He tosses Sheamus to the mat and slaps him over and over. Sheamus comes back. Dallas tries a Bo-dog. Sheamus gets out of it. Dallas slaps him again -- and Sheamus hits the Brogue to end it at 4:55.
WINNER: Sheamus via Brogue Kick
RATING: *1/2. The Usos and Miz's should have been the Main Event but what do I know?

Sheamus celebrates as we go off the air.

OVERALL: **. Your usual Main Event fare.

Er...that's it.

Scott's got NXT and also some retro shows along with Bayless. Tommy takes you into the weekend with the Smackdown recap and AndyPG returns next week to his regular slot. I'm out.

Thank you to all the BoD'ers and, hey, if you wanna read more of our stuff, please visit WE HATE YOUR GIMMICK at http://wehateyourgimmick.blogspot.com and, of course, visit us on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/groups/wehateyourgimmick/

Comments

  1. I know Bischoff was into replicating WCW's '95-96 success over again but seriously, giving away RAW results in 1999 was a major reach.

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  2. CruelConnectionNumber2October 29, 2014 at 2:55 PM

    Rey came out with the gas mask because he knew the show would stink.

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  3. Even for a one hour show, that sounded painful.

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  4. "Yep Mode" Abeyance Brown ©October 29, 2014 at 3:07 PM

    Twin magic just doesn't sound right when it's about the Uso's, anyway, good review.

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  5. It's easier than watching 3 hours of RAW, though. I will say that much.

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  6. I used to really like Main Event. A few matches, a few laughs, now it's Raw Jr. Jr.

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  7. The PG/Perri feud is more entertaining than WWE.

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  8. We at least know it will come to a satisfying conclusion at BoD Survivor Series. Hopefully there will be some old-school SS elimination matches as well. Biscuit and his improved bow and arrow submission are ready to shine!

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  9. SUCKA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Now do his Superstars review as well!

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  10. Yep. Was it that first book that he told the story about Hall and Nash still being on "WWF Time" when they first arrived in WCW and the three of them were all alone at a WCW show while actually being on time?

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  11. That true but Bret was a lame duck champion. He had the belt to put Shawn over then he was leaving for a while.

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  12. He thought Vince and JR commentating that he had ring rust in his first match back was a conspiracy to make him look bad to.

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  13. What's funny about that is Bret has said he didn't mind dropping the title, but he did mind being a transitional champion. But, I mean, what did he think the plan was from the begining?

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  14. Bret has no problem dropping the title except to the person in the circumstances he's asked to drop the title.

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  15. WWF1987 and I were feuding for a month and we didn't even make it on BOD Raw.

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  16. Given his star power, I always felt Razor did too many jobs as it was.

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  17. Perspective from a former Winnipegger:

    Winnipeg and Edmonton are sister cities and while Edmonton is significantly more northern, they both have pretty equally insane temperatures, with +40C summers and -40C winters. The tipping point, I think, is that Edmonton has oil money and another city in close vicinity in Calgary. Winnipeg is in the middle of nowhere, has a huge self-loathing problem and is losing young people like crazy: A recent poll found that at least 80% were considering leaving in the near future.

    The only place that gets more shit-on than Winnipeg is Regina.

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  18. Can you tell Andy to 'do this real quick'

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  19. Which ironically made very little difference in the long term.

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  20. Yup. That's what he said too.


    Sometimes it pays to have a genuine scientologist in the family.

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  21. even more: his punishment was not winning the thing that year, which allegedly had been the initial plan.

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  22. YankeesHoganTripleHFanOctober 29, 2014 at 5:19 PM

    He made a diffrence...the stink face was an institution during the latter stages of the attitude era! (unfortunatly that also led to poop stain patterson, which, without going into detail led to my lowest moment as a wrestling fan)

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  23. he buried Douglas here... the "Kliq" hated Douglas from the start because Kid's heel turn was going to be as Douglas' sidekick, but the guys wanted the turn to be Kid getting the IC title... so they thought killing off the Dean character would lead to Kid getting his push... instead Razor got a lame duck title reign of three months, a gay storyline, and shown the door

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  24. yeah Nash doesn't bring up Vince chewing him out in front of all the fans at ringside (and the entire locker room that was in the ring to close the show) during one of his drunken asshole shoots

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  25. people forget because the nWo was so successful that Nash was the only guy that decided not to sign with Vince and jump to WCW, Hall was kicked out the door and "suspended" through WrestleMania 12 to prevent him from being part of the big payday for everyone... he did make IYH 7 the next month to put over Vader

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  26. YankeesHoganTripleHFanOctober 29, 2014 at 5:25 PM

    Nash put it very simply to HBK before he left. He basically said "I gotta go make some money now."

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  27. We're actually friends...but I'm sure it's one of those Mark Henry/Big Show type deals where one of us turns heel during a match.

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  28. Main Event put Andy into a deep sleep, from which he has yet to awaken.

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  29. Guess you're not a sucker after all.

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  30. Oh, I already knew it didn't. Hence, the joke in the RAW recap.

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  31. "I did it for The Rock" silence

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  32. Littering and...littering and.........littering and....

    Smokin' the reefer

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  33. NASH = total hypocrisy

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  34. A lame win doesn't make you stronger

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  35. It's true Douglas was buried here and there's no excuse for that, but Hall was still the most professional one from the Kliq and hindsight has shown that Douglas was never going to be that guy anyway so his burial tends to be overlooked.

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  36. Never ever knew about that particular "chewing out" of Diesel, and I like to think of myself as a pretty hardcore fan.

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  37. I don't remember this show at all. It was either because I wasn't watching or the VCR was broken.

    The Great VCR Crash of 1999 was not a pretty sight.

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  38. Virgil's Gimmick TableOctober 29, 2014 at 8:07 PM

    Andy didn't want to do it because the show isn't long enough to write 40 paragraphs about.

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  39. The women's match was actually VERY good but the awful commentary ruined it.

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  40. It was good but Paige yelling and acting pseudo-psycho is just so over-the-top, it kinda ruins the pacing. :( That, and the commentary. They need to keep Kidd off the mic.

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