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A VERY PG CHRISTMAS: What If

So with PSN being wonky yesterday, I couldn't get into the WWE Network to review the first of many PPVs for your pleasure.  New schedule, then:

Today: a WHAT IF.
Tomorrow: a TNA PPV.
Sunday: WrestleMania Recall.
Monday: Raw in DC.
Tuesday: A wild card PPV.
Wednesday: BoDWF News Report with Wade Michael Meltzer.




Here is today's What If:

What if Brutus Beefcake never went parasailing on July 4, 1990?

On that day, Beefcake was involved in a horrific crash that by all rights should have cost him his career and nearly killed him.  He required a very long reconstruction surgery to his skull, and he didn't take a bump or wrestle a match until 2 1/2 years later.  At the time, he and Mr. Perfect were embroiled in a hot feud, one that seemed ready to culminate at SummerSlam 1990 with the Intercontinental Title on the line.

Now, on the surface this seems a rather easy answer: he wins the I-C title from Mr. Perfect, they turn him heel and test him against Hogan in 1991 or later, and he cruises as one of the Hogan Clique members from there.  In fact, his WCW career is likely unchanged.  HOWEVER...

The bigger issue is who gets their push delayed as a result of Beefcake still being around.  In 1990, Kerry Von Erich was signed hastily by Vince as a replacement Barber (and for his value to the Texas market).  His WWF career seemed doomed from the start, since he was inevitably compared with Ultimate Warrior and came up short in the charisma department.  If Vince doesn't need him, does the NWA/WCW take a chance on him?  And if so, what happens to him?

But then there's Bret Hart.  Vince had been willing and trying to pull the trigger on a Bret singles run for some time, and you can see in Royal Rumbles that Bret's stamina is a valuable asset -- he had long runs in 1988, 1990, and 1991.  However, does he get that chance if Hogan's brother Bruti is still active?  Or does Vince have to delay Bret's rise until 1992-93 -- which in turn puts his World title reigns on the back burner for a year or two?

Gentlemen, discuss: WHAT IF?

Comments

  1. MAYBE a run with the IC title, but that's it.

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  2. We'd be subjected to many shitty Brutus Beefcake IC title matches in late '90-'91, but that's about it.

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  3. Beefcake being around wouldn't have affected Bret at all.

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  4. What if Andy PG doesn't post this?

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  5. CruelConnectionNumber2December 26, 2014 at 11:02 AM

    It's like 7 days of coal.

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  6. Bret vs Perfect at Summerslam '90 - where Bret would've lost lacking a deadly finisher such as the sharpshooter? Would the Rockers have gotten their promised tag title run by defeating Demolition at that same event, where LOD would still have distracted..? But wasn't Shawn hurt legit so... Pull the trigger early on LOD vs Demolition?

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  7. Beefcake dethroning Flair in October of 1992 makes me sad just thinking about.

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  8. Let's not do the seven day schedule and say we did.

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  9. I can't imagine any scenario where Beefcake wins the WWF title.

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  10. The new year is going to have DAILY posts from AndyPG of all people?

    Good grief!

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  11. Happy Birthday Baby New Year...hope you like crap.

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  12. Beefcake would have been the third man. But whose side is he on?

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  13. What if Meekin started up the QotD again?

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  14. "they turn him heel and test him against Hogan in 1991 or later,"
    Iraqi turncoat Brutus Beefcake?
    BOOK IT!

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  15. Scott needs to come squash this before it begins. This is not good. Not good at all.

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  16. What if Scooby and the gang didn't save Cena and the WWE from Charles S. Dutton in the Wrestlemania Mystery?

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  17. Who the hell asked Scott Keith Clause for daily doses of PG??? Oh well bring on the meltdown.

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  18. Dude, spoiler alert.

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  19. If this gets rid of him sooner I'm all for it.

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  20. I was thinking the same thing!

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  21. Oops. My bad.

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  22. AndyPG. The overriding sentiment is that this isn't what people want. Why not just write your own blog and provide a link to your shitty posts in the daily update so you can still write, but we can all just ignore it? That really seems like the way to go.

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  23. He will crack just like the mutants who came before him. Although I'm intrigued at the train wreck possibilities here. Why is it always the least like able writers on here that muscle their way into spotlight hogging shit like this??

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  24. It's like the Andy PG's posts of wrestling matches.

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  25. Maybe if he changed his name to AndyTV-14 people would be more receptive?

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  26. What if Andy booked a scenario where he and Molly Holly got married? Oh wait he already did that...

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  27. Before or after she shaved her head?

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  28. Oh yeah, forgot about that.

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  29. Another user on here linked to a website where Andy booked an overblown e fed that involved William Regal sexually assaulting Molly Holly and Andy booking himself to come to her rescue and eventually marry her, if my memory serves. The dude has waaaay too much time on his hands and takes wrestling waaaay too seriously.

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  30. Wait...Charles S. Dutton...YOU MEAN CENA SAVES WRESTLEMANIA FROM THE ROC?!

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  31. If the blog had awards for best feud I think Andy PG vs. the blog would win in a landslide.

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  32. "that involved William Regal sexually assaulting Molly Holly and Andy booking himself to come to her rescue and eventually marry her, if my memory serves."



    Welp, he's dead to me now.

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  33. C'mon, dude. Don't do this to yourself. We all know how this ends.

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  34. And he would have gotten away with it too...
    If it weren't for those meddling kids!

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  35. With a staph infection and getting fired on his wedding day to Molly Holly?

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  36. i would vote for meekin v the blog

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  37. Marv Cresto destroys him the same way Marv's handled Caliber?

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  38. This is nothing compared to Meekin or Caliber.

    Andy's fine as a Raw recapper. But we don't need more.

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  39. Danimal vs Matt Perri's girlfriend has to be up there.

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  40. Meekin would win in a landslide, Andy MIGHT finish Top Three.

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  41. Danimal vs. quite a few people would qualify.

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  42. I would vote for Meekin vs. DDPYOGA.

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  43. Yup, throw Doc Muraco into that category too.

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  44. What if Seinfeld still on tv today?

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  45. Did Dock Muraco have a meltdown or did he just leave?

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  46. But what if it was still new each week, with Jerry getting iPhone 6?

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  47. I like that Twitter.

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  48. Hahaha sick reference.

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  49. I think he just stopped posting, I don't remember seeing a meltdown. Wouldn't be surprised if he re-appeared with a review of the Tokyo Dome show next weekend.

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  50. It's hard work claiming every single Japanese match u see if OMFG THE GREATEST THING EVER ***** America sucks!!

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  51. He just started posting randomly. Never introducing himself or anything, just hey, here's some puro matches.


    Then when no one cared, he had to resort to trolling to get any sort of attention on this blog, which led people to focus on him and not the matches he was trying to pimp. Not good

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  52. Seriously. Part of me wants to get into some NJPW or other puro, if for no other reason than to justify my desire to buy a Bullet Club t-shirt. But that guy jizzing all over himself any time a person employed by a Japanese wrestling company sets foot in a ring wasn't helping.

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  53. Or 7 days of Michael Cole...

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  54. Brutus wins the IC belt from Perfect, and loses it back to him around Dec or Jan. maybe he stays around as a Hogan flu lie for a while, but the rest of history remains unchanged, well except for the stuff about Kerry. He might still get signed or might go to WCW.

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  55. Yeah, I don't think it changes much. Brutus wins the IC belt at SummerSlam '90. He and Hulk probably pal around with their singles belts for a while and Hennig probably wins the IC belt back either at Wrestlemania 7 or before. Brutus remains Hogan's right-hand guy. Maybe in 1991 Hogan/Brutus do a tag run with the Natural Disasters and Beefcake turns on Hogan to leave him for dead at some point. Hogan vs. Beefcake happens at Wrestlemania 8 and everyone shits all over it, while Savage vs. Flair steals the show just like what really happened. Beefcake probably toils around the mid-card after turning back babyface (in Hogan's absense in '92). Maybe they return together for Wrestlemania 9 and, in a nice bit of symmetry, reunite to challenge Money Inc. for the tag titles. Hulk ends up winning the WWF title in the main event anyway, so Brutus probably participates in the '93 KOTR tourney. Yoko beats Hulk for the title and probably squashes Beefcake right out of the company, since WWF without Hogan really doesn't need Brutus. Beefcake joins WCW with Hogan in '94 and remains his flunky until his last days.

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  56. If Hogan just settles for the tag belts at Wrestlemania 9 and doesn't hijack the main event, who does Bret Hart defend against at KOTR '93? Savage? Who wins the KOTR tournament? 'The Narcissist' Lex Luger maybe?

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  57. Glad I'm not the only one that's had connectivity issues. WTF was with YouTube not working in the past day? That never happens.

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  58. It's not that he liked NJPW. It was his condescending attitude towards it. He was not trying to get the promotion over. He was trying to get himself over in a holler-than-thou type of way, but it just backfired on him.

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  59. Ed Leslie wins the IC belt and probably not much different after that. The perks of being Hogan's best buddy.

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  60. I'd rather read Meekin's self indulgent bullshit than AndyPG's self indulgent bullshit

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  61. Imagine what if they rebooted Robocop. That's what I'm risking right now via Netflix.

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  62. If Hogan and Beefcake won the tag titles at WMIX, Bret would've lost the WWF title to Yokozuna and the tag title match would've gone on last. Bret wins the title back at WMX, just like he did, to avenge the loss.

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  63. I just ignore her now. I'm glad her Total Divas write ups are gone. The format was atrocious. It was just her getting Matt's opinion on everything. Pathetic. She has zero business writing for the BoD. Keep that shit on Matt's blog that no one reads.

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  64. It's ok for what it is. It's just not the high art that is the original Robocop.

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  65. Hm. Well.

    This was a misfire.

    Okay, so I had done this last year and people seemed to like it. So I floated the idea and it seemed like it would work again. Oh well, obviously not. So I guess I'll just stick with recapping Raw and the occasional PPV. I'm not upset -- I made a mistake. I admit it.

    As for this fanfic people discovered -- that was written 11 years ago. I was on academic suspension from college. I had had a friend at the school whose boyfriend abused her. I was hitting rock bottom, and I needed an outlet. Yes, I check off every box for an emo fanfic writer. I admit it; it's not good. I can't even read the damn thing nowadays, it's that bad. I'm not sorry I wrote it -- I needed the therapy -- but I am sorry I published it.

    (By the way, my character did not marry Molly Holly. No, it's worse than that; he married Torrie Wilson. Molly Holly married CM Punk. I find this as funny in retrospect as you do now.)

    So, yeah, if you want me to do a Mania on Sunday, I will. If you want me to just come back for Raw on Monday, that's fine too. Much like most things I try, this seemed like a good idea at the time. Sorry, everyone.

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  66. This is the most adult reaction to something happening here ever. Good for you AndyPG.

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  67. I really don't get why people are getting so riled up about this. What is really all that wrong with doing a "What If?" thread? Isn't this sort of impassioned "WTF?" outburst from numerous posters exactly the sort of "meltdown" we mock certain others for? Jesus H., if the subject doesn't interest you, just move on to the next one.

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  68. If you enjoy doing it and a bunch of folks on here like it, just keep doing it. People who post in a thread just to say how much a waste of time they think a thread is.....is not really an audience worth targeting. Keep the content on here diverse, I say

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  69. Do you think they still move the title onto Yoko if there was no intent of jobbing it to Hogan? Not disputing it, just clarifying

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  70. I think people were more upset with Andy doing daily posts. No one wants that. If he wants that he should start his own blog. We shoulda have to avoid it. It just shouldn't exist.

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  71. I'm surely in the minority here, but I never found that show to be the comedic genius-level stuff any others do. I am admittedly averse to the "stereotypical sitcom-based New Yorker" banter and found George/Jerry's interactions obnoxious about as often as it was funny

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  72. But "avoid it" entails nothing more than scrolling past it. I'm not sure I follow

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  73. This isn't his blog. End of discussion.

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  74. Another terrible opinion. You're on fire today.

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  75. Agreed, but if his topics get Scott an extra few hundred hits here and there, isn't that a win for SK's Blog?

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  76. The fact that Scott's letting him post this in the first place suggests that aspect isn't really an issue.

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  77. It is if he's posting shit daily. He's the Raw recapper (for now).

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  78. We've been through it constantly. Andy is just the latest guy attempting to make this site his daily vanity project. Aside from maybe the first few weeks of the QOTD, there has never been any interest from anyone in someone doing this. It's not a case of "scroll if you don't like it." It's a case of we've all expressed consensus, active disinterest in people doing this, and yet every few weeks it seems someone else feels it's time for us to hear their thoughts daily. Nothing changes but the name of the doofus who does it.

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  79. "it seems someone else feels it's time for us to hear their thoughts daily"


    Isn't that quite literally the whole motivation for people posting on this (or any) Blog?

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  80. What's this thread about? I don't get it. It stinks.

    Andy PG shouldn't be allowed to start topics.

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  81. I have posting access and, technically, could do this every day if I want to, and I suppose said access means Scott is implicitly "allowing" me to do so. But I don't, because no one wants to read me every day. And if they did, they'd be coming to my site to do it.

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  82. ....?

    I think you're missing the point.

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  83. "This was a misfire", as opposed to everything else you do which is a hit?

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  84. I don't understand the backlash to you, but you handled it well. I don't watch Raw, so I enjoy the recaps you do. As far as the fanfic, why anyone would care is beyond me.

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  85. You're a virtuous man, Mears.

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  86. Quite possibly, but my take away from that is that you are taking issue with people thinking it's "time for us to hear their thoughts daily." My reply was highlighting the fact that people go on this Blog daily to share their thoughts. It's just not in a new thread headline

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  87. I saw that opening day in the theater because I really liked the director's Brazillian movies. That was a huge mistake.

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  88. You're an enabler.

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  89. NJPW is fun, but it's not the be all end all of wrestling some people claim it is. Once you understand the formula, it's pretty dramatic, but not the constant 5 star blizzard some say it is.

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  90. God forbid a differing opinion. Seinfeld was a solid show, but I've never been a huge fan. That's pretty much all I was expressing there.

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  91. What else are you not a fan of? 18 year old pussy? A child's laughter?

    Keep it up, slugger.

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  92. Possibly. I just like stuff to read, though. Although, making fun of someone's fanfic...who hasn't written embarrassing stuff somewhere? I once wrote a passionate argument comparing Wu-Tang Clan albums to opera.

    And his recaps, while way too long, are helpful if you skip the show like I do. It's not like Scott's going to go back to recapping Raw and Tommy doesn't want to.

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  93. "who hasn't written embarrassing stuff somewhere? I once wrote a passionate argument comparing Wu-Tang Clan albums to opera."

    Don't lump everybody else in with this.

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  94. Maybe I'm too empathic, but you're Satan, so....

    Seriously, though, fair enough. I'm also not posting new topics to the blog everyday.

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  95. Yes, I do. I think Yoko can have a 12 month run instead of a 9 month run and, if Vince gets tired of Hogan not wanting to work, the Mega Maniacs can job the titles back to Money Inc. at KOTR or SummerSlam, with Hogan eating the pin.

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  96. You should check out the forums. It was created for exactly what you are suggesting. If you look closely you'll notice no one posts there. That is because no one is looking for anyone's feelings every day. The daily thread and the evening thread is a dump for that. That is all that is needed. Done. No individual poster needs to be on a daily posting spree unless they are doing it on their own blog. Then you can follow their posts there.

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  97. Apparently the San Francisco Giants may target Tampa Bay's Ben Zobrist.

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  98. EXACTLY! You know what's on Channel 36 EVERY DAY on my TV? The God-forsaken Kardashians. You know what's on Channel 37 at the same time? NOT the Kardashians. Don't like it? Don't watch/read it.

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  99. It's been fine, I guess. But I'm kinda bored. It doesn't have the slightly sleazy video nasty charm of the original.

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  100. Jesus. Why all the hate?

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  101. Why is everybody so anti-Andy PG? Jeez.....

    As for the "What if?", I think the Ultimate issue is that The Apocalypse in the form of the Butchering, Barbering, Zebra-striped Zodiac/Booty Man.....with no name, known as Big Brother Bruti drew a Zero buyrate, so perhaps once Vince discovered this in about 92 or 93 in the WWF, we probably don't get Starrcade 94 with Hogan v. Beefacke....instead, if history is any indication, we probably get Hogan vs. Avalanche (John Tenta) as a replacement, Vader ultimately still gets buried, along with Ric Flair's dignity, and perhaps Kerry Von Erich's I-C title reign never happens, or is much shorter - maybe a week or 2 instead of 3 minths.....but quite possibly, neither does his suicide. You never know.

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  102. Have you not been paying attention?

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  103. I think your mistake was in announcing it. If stuff is posted here, people will read it if it interests them. People hate self promotion. When you call it 'A Very PG Christmas' it reeks of self importance. Meekin made the same mistake - trying to make the blog about Meekin rather than the content.


    So post your stuff. I actually like the Raw recaps. Maybe space it out so its Raw recap on a Monday and 1 other thing per week on a Thursday rather than doing 7 days straight. Some people might be dicks about it in the comments, but those people tend to be a dicks about everything. Just don't try to get yourself over.


    Ultimately this is Scott's blog and people come to read Scott's thoughts. Everyone else is just window dressing and filler. If you want to build a character and a brand then post your stuff to 411.

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  104. Mr. Satan is garbage and this Sunday I'm taking him out

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  105. yes, which is the ongong theory on why Scott let's crap get posted like AndyPg or Southern states pro wrestling recaps (even though the guy who does them writes well).

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  106. Beefcake runs with the title a little longer than the Tornado, but probably still drops it back to Perfect, who then drops it back to Bret.

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  107. Wait, are you implying that Andy and Jesse Baker are the same person?

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  108. Actually, Bret was booked to beat Yoko IIRC until Hogan decided to win the belt.

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  109. Andy can start his own blog and put up what ever he wants. That way we can all avoid it all together. This is not his blog, he does not need to spam it with all his topics. He agreed in a very classy manner. Let's all move on as well.

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  110. I don't speak for everyone in here by any means, but most of it was harmless ribbing. A few comments were a bit harsh, but for the most part all in good fun. As far as the "what if" question and title of the thread, it was pretty Meekin-ish and made it an easy target. "What if" questions are interesting to me a lot of the time, but this one was way out in left field. Beefcake in 91-92 WWF is something that hardly anyone gives a shit about.
    Good to see you took it all standing up.

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  111. AndyPG, for the record, I liked the "What If" today, and have no problem with your posts (especially if Scott doesnt).

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  112. Andy should start his own blog! You can be the guy who reads it. You're white knighting for him so hard today. I think it should be taken as encouragement for Andy to venture out on his own. Good luck Andy! I wish you the best!

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  113. Andy, I generally like you, but word to the wise: you've been here long enough to know that people who start using Scott's blog to get themselves over are going to be ridiculed at length. It hasn't even been that long since the blog otters (lol) had a long, long, long thread where we asked Scott to cut the amount of stuff that was being posted on the front page. Just stick with reviewing Raw and improving.

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