Monday, December 15, 2014

BoD RAW

This has nothing to do with the WWE



Live from Detroit, MI


GM Bayless appears on the minimally expensive BoD-Tron. He is from an undisclosed location as he took the remaining members of his administration with him to hide from Archie Stackhouse and the Riverdale Covenant, even though he will not admit that is the case. Here is what he has to say:

"Since the Administration has dwindled down, I have called an emergency retreat so we can bond as one cohesive unit. I will not disclose our location and if I did, it would be to lure Archie Stackhouse and the Riverdale Covenant so we could destroy them once and for all. Now, most of the roster is at the BoD We Kinda-Sorta Care Charity Holiday Function so we have a bare bones crew tonight as we have been reduced to one-hour for a documentary on Anchor Cheese narrated by Tony Garea. Anyway, enjoy the show as next week we have a stacked card at the Minnesota BoD RAW!!!!!!!"



BoD Tag Team Tournament Match
Strike Force vs. Paul Meekin & White Thunder

Mar Solo is coming out double-fisting two of his holiday mugs that are available on BoD Shopzone: "Why is this Empty" and "Not Big Enough." This isn't big enough." The women in the crowd are going crazy for the guys in the Chrysler Lebaron, white windbreakers, and the 1987 Rick Martel haircut. The crowd predictably gets on Meekin's case as this match begins with Matt Indeed and White Thunder. Indeed gets a hiptoss then a dropkick before highstepping and pumping his fist in the air. Mar Solo runs in and they do a leaping high-five then the referee orders Solo to the apron but that allows Meekin to attack Indeed from behind. Meekin tags and stomps on Indeed in the corner as Solo is seen handing a fan money, presumably for coffee as his partner is getting attacked. Indeed remains in trouble as Meekin tags back in and goes for a cannonball in the corner but misses as both men are down. The fan comes back with 4 cups of coffee for Solo as he heads back on the apron and gets excited as his partner is getting up. Solo drinks two cups and knocks over the rest jumping up and down. Meekin tags out to Thunder but Indeed crawls between his legs and makes the tag!!! Solo is a carafe of fire here as he takes out the Rybaxel of the BoD with flying forearms!!!! Solo is highstepping all over the place now. Meekin tries to hit him from behind and misses but Thunder clotheslines Solo down. Meekin gets up and sets him up for the Otter Dropper but Indeed springboards off of the apron and dropkicks Meekin. Thunder elbows Indeed and goes for an Irish Whip but Indeed reverses it and he collides with his partner, who falls out of the ring. Solo gets up and bounces off of the ropes and hits White Thunder with a flying forearm and covers for the win!!!!! On the outside a pissed off Meekin grabs the mic:

"I have had enough! I am leaving and when I come back, it will be with a better partner!"


The crowd chants at Meekin to leave and he does......................for now.



And now here is life in the C-List with BoD C-List Champion, DBSM and his posse.

DBSM, Mark Linn-Baker, Harvey Grant, Jamiroquai, and the guy who played Waldo on "Family Matters" are shown as they head through the airport. DBSM proudly displays his C-List Championship. Jamiroquai then pulls out a bag that has five oversized top hats. Everyone else is ecstatic as they gladly put on the hats. They then head over to the skywalk and are now walking backwards on the treadmill as security yells at them to stop. DBSM points over at his belt and security then steps aside. Harvey Grant pulls up his Uber app and the guys take a cab over to the local Dave and Busters. They arrive and engage in a free-throw shooting contest. Harvey misses four in a row and Mark Linn-Baker cracks a joke about his free throw ability that causes the guy who played Waldo from "Family Matters" to do a spit take with his milkshake that has everyone cracking up. DBSM then pulls out some goggles as Harvey smiles. He then puts them on and sinks six in a row. Mark-Linn Baker then tells them that there is a party over at Steve Guttenberg's house so he uses his Uber app as they take a cab over. In the car, the hear sirens and immediately freak out as the car pulls over. But wait, it was not the cops. A man pops out from behind the seat and that man is Michael Winslow, the sound effect guy from the "Police Academy" movies. Everyone gets excited as Winslow asks them where they are going and they say to Guttenberg's party. Winslow then asks if he can come see his old pal and they agree as the posse as gained another member







BoD Tag Team Tournament Match
Abeyance & thebraziliankid vs. RIPSHIT KILLERS

Winner of this will face Strike Force next week in the semi-finals. THE YETAAAAY starts off by beating on thebraziliankid, who is fresh off of failing his medieval final. He looked a bit sluggish out there to begin. A hangover, perhaps? thebraziliankid is now getting stomped in the corner as Abeyance is on the apron cheering on his partner. thebraziliankid fights back but ARRRGH THE BARBARIAN slams him down. thebraziliankid is getting destroyed in there as the RIPSHIT KILLERS are in total control. THE YETAAAAY climbs up top for an elbow but the kid rolls away. Abeyance rallies his partner who is slowly getting up. The kid crawls over and makes the tag as GUNS DON'T KILL PEOPLE, ABEYANCE KILLS PEOPLE. And Abeyance is a one-man gang out there. thebraziliankid gets back in the ring but Mr. Satan comes down the aisle now and yanks him out. Abeyance then ducks outside to help his partner as they chase around Mr. Satan but the referee counts to ten and they lose the match as the RIPSHIT KILLERS advance to the semi-finals. Here are the semi-finals:

Curtzerker vs. Dancin' Devin Harris & Lil' James
Strike Force vs. RIPSHIT KILLERS



In the locker room, Steve Ferrari approaches the rest of the Midcard Mafia.

Ferrari: Hey guys, just want to say that I am not mad about BoD Survivor Series. (turns to Magoonie) I forgive you for eliminating me and I know it is tough replacing Nick the Brick as my partner but don't worry because as long as you stand out of the way, I can carry us to the title and finally put an end to the reign of the Upper Midcard Express. (Piers & Magoonie look shocked). Now excuse me as I need to find a Larabar to eat. 



Hoss w/ Biff Kensington III vs. Phillipe TCA

Phillipe TCA was part of the "Asked and Get Booked Initiative." Hoss looks angrier than usual tonight. TCA tries a dropkick but Hoss brushes that off with ease. TCA charges but bounces off of Hoss then gets flattened with a clothesline. Hoss then picks him up and hits a chokeslam for the win. Now, BK3 grabs the mic:

Ladies and Gentleman, you are looking at the next BoD Heavyweight Champion. I have just received word that your first entry in this year's BoD Rumble is no other than Hoss. And he will plow through 29 other guys to get the title and then he will get all of the ice cream. ALL OF THE ICE CREAM!!!!! 

After that both men laugh and leave the arena.



Parallax is in the ring and he has a mic:


"You know, the BoD is nothing without men. It is nothing but whining and complaining. Stuff that I could take care of with just one curbstomp. But what I have to say is that I better be in the BoD Rumble match this January. I better be.................

Cultstatus runs into the ring and attacks Parallax, He has a chair but misses as Parallax takes him down and they brawl. These two are going all over the place as White Coat Security tries to intervene. Both men go nuts as the Security is helpless against this riot. They are now in the stands as fans are going out of their minds. And we have a riot, folks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fans are throwing everything they have. Parallax and Cult are brawling at the top of the bleachers. We are out of time. Tune in next week to the BoD RAW Supershow in Minneapolis!








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