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Looney Reigns - The Ultimate Roman Reigns Bad Promo Mashup

> http://uproxx.com/prowrestling/2015/01/watch-looney-reigns-the-ultimate-mash-up-of-bad-roman-reigns-promos/

I was wondering when someone was gonna forward this to me.

Comments

  1. Check my contribution out.

    http://s11.postimg.org/a6oif1hmr/Roman_Reigns_Cat_in_the_Hat.jpg

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  2. I didn't find this funny, it's not creative at all.

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  3. Yeah I agree, Roman isn't creative at all.

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  4. Didn't think the video was that funny (it's not really a "mashup" when you just bookend all the promos with the Looney Tunes song) but wow, watching all of that together...he is *death* on the mic right now. I'm sure he must be able to do better once he's just being himself.

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  5. These are so bad that I'm starting to feel sorry for the guy.


    That cocking the fist motion... there's something really un-PG about it.

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  6. I remember a funny bit on the Network's "top 10 Blunders" when they talk about Sid on the mic and summing up with "He would have been great if he just hadn't talked." Starting to think the same with Reigns, keep him quiet because this is killing his push every time he opens his mouth.

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  7. Vince writes the promos. Says it all right there.

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  8. Yikes. Just yikes.

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  9. It was just 2 minutes of his promos playing, I thought it would be wittier.

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  10. I like the Jim Ross voice over with Roman picking up the mic that's viral right now "don't do it!"

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  11. He's hilariously awful but it's not his fault. They're highlighting what he's bad at. The writing is awful but really, someone like Rock or Jericho could pull of that stupid Jack And The Beanstalk crap. But Reigns isn't Jericho and he sure as hell isn't his cousin Rock. He should have been booked like early Goldberg after the Shield broke up. Quickly kick ass, and leave without saying a word. Certainly that couldn't go on forever. But get him over first as a badass before you worry about the promos.


    There's no way he should win the title at Wrestlemania. The promos are one thing. But when did he ever have a good fifteen or twenty minute match? His first one is gonna be at Wrestlemania? Against Brock whose last two WM matches sucked? Brock vs. Reigns would be a complete disaster. Frankly, at this point, I'm not so sure he could have a great match with Shawn or Kurt Angle in their primes. And I'm not blaming him. It's on Vince. "Derrrr....big tough guy deserves title!" That won't work. See: Cool, Big Daddy.

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  12. "You thought wrong, dude." -----Mad Dog Tannen


    I've been on a big Back To The Future kick lately.

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  13. Holy shit, all of that in one clip just makes it so much better.

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  14. Every time he does it the chicks squeel.

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  15. Ugh, that's awful. They are trying to turn him into Cena 2.0 with "poopy" jokes. Like Johnny Polo said, why not let him be "The Hound of Justice", go out and destroy some jobbers and not talk. Watch 1997-98 Goldberg, his mannerisms and go from there. Suffering succotash was awful, and Big Show looked like he was about to fall asleep with that rambling parable that made no sense whatsoever. Ugh, glad I tuned out long ago.

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  16. I have that one.

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  17. Yeah and Batista is known for always paying for guys bar tabs and stuff on the road.

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  18. That Jack and the Beanstalk one totally comes off as one they'd give Rock in his prime but he'd make it funny and work.

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  19. Do you think they're cognizant of how bad they've got it?

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  20. "Yep Mode" Abeyance Brown ©January 15, 2015 at 3:26 PM

    One of my favorite videos of all time.

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  21. He's trying to do these promos in a laid back, naturalistic style, when what they need is hyped up, cocaine-fuelled delivery.

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  22. "Yep Mode" Abeyance Brown ©January 15, 2015 at 3:27 PM

    He just looks so goofy when he's laid back.

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  23. That's truly painful to watch.

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  24. The laid back, cool guy act does not mesh with THE JUGGERNAUT in-ring persona we're supposed to be getting. He could disguise his lack of wrestling ability with an increase of intensity.

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  25. "Yep Mode" Abeyance Brown ©January 15, 2015 at 3:31 PM

    I lose it every time within the first 10 seconds.
    "Faster than a speeding bullet, PPOW!"

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  26. Finally saw the wink in this video, that appears to be a clear message to people like us that even Roman knows this shit is awful.


    Also, I feel like I saw the Be-Be-Believe That joke right here, on this very blog, about a week ago.

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  27. Ask davari who chris Benoit made do Hindu squats until he pissed blood.

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  28. As Austin is fond of saying, sometimes you gotta make chicken salad from chicken shit. If Bryan got the therapy session stuff over, this should be a breeze. Speaking of which, I haven't seen it, but how did Ambrose's skits on Monday compare.

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  29. So did i when i was in college Fly, Batista was like 35 at the time.

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  30. I dont know. Breaking my ass for 250+ nights a week I think id rather have a co worker show some empathy for me and help me out when im sick as a dog rather than buy me a drink. But hey, to each their own.

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  31. is it just coincedence that you only mention Batista and not Finlay as well, despite him also being involved?

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  32. He didnt say whether Finlay was a great guy or not. He did with Batista. Therefore there was no need to bring up Finlay since both according to Bayless' s review were just as responsible.Please try to keep up.

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  33. They sucked.

    Ambrose has been shunted down the card in much the same way as they tried with Bryan last year. But coming up short every time against Rollins and Wyatt has hurt him and the crowd are starting to lose interest. I know I am.

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  34. I dunno....I feel like you can be a "good day" and still pull a fairly harmless rib on someone. It's just busting your buddy's balls. Like I always slap my friends on the arm when they get a new tattoo -- it's a dick move, but they laugh and tell me to screw off. They don't think I'm an actual dick.

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  35. This place is full of sniveling little sell out, suck ups full of SUFFERING SUCCOTASH!

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  36. Why would playing all of his greatest hits be witty?

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  37. Considering the type of ribs Owen Hart was notorious for, this seems rather tame.


    Owen would have spiked Hawkin's cold medicine with laxative or something.

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  38. What's funny to me is that Vince is clearly writing for Reigns as if he was writing for The Rock. The Rock could make that fairy tale promo entertaining.
    Much like Vince was trying to make Lex Luger the second coming of Hulk Hogan, he is trying to make Reigns the second coming of The Rock.

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  39. Reigns needs Brian Gerwitz writing for him, then. No wonder The Rock hired Gerwitz when Vince fired him.

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  40. He *was* doing that when he was in The Shield. Then they broke them up and made Roman talk more

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  41. It's not the material, it's the delivery

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  42. No, that wink was probably written into his script

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  43. Reigns' stumbles gives me hope that Bryan will headline Mania again. I can't wait to hear crowd reactions at this Rumble

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  44. Even worst than "suffering succatash" is "Seth Im sorry I interupted... oh wait, Im NOT sorry"

    Oooh what a badass

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  45. #sorrynotsorry

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  46. Oh god I hope Vince doesn't rent Clueless or Wayne's World.

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  47. #sorrynotsorry what a clown

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  48. RoFISTo Reigns. Master....of the Powerfist!

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  49. Jesus wept.....and THIS guy has the power to veto promo scripts? Vince clearly HAS gone utterly, irreversibly senile. George "the Animal" Steele was a better promo than Roman. I'm siding with the people who are saying that Reigns should be a silent badass, a la early Goldberg.

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  50. Yeah, JR yelling "NO! NO! DON'T DO IT!" as Reigns approaches a mic is fucking hysterical.

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  51. Yeah, look at the garbage Bryan's had to do and get over with the crowd. No sympathy because Reigns can't do the same, that's part of the gig sometimes.

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  52. I long for the days of Big Poppa Pump shouting at me for 10mins. At least that incoherence was part of his nutbag character. It worked.

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  53. That would be glorious! "Seth, I'm sorry I interrupted...NOT!"

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  54. *obvious your mum joke here*

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  55. Like the Warrior, it not making sense worked and was part of the charm.

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  56. George "The Animal" Steele was a much better promo than Reigns.

    He was over.

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  57. I kinda agree and kinda don't. Gerwitz wasn't a great writer by any means, but he was able up write gold for The Rock. A lot of that was Rock's delivery, but I think some of it was also Gerwitz and Rock reworking bits until they worked. I don't get the impression Vince is reworking the promos based on feedback from and observation of Reigns.

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  58. Maybe Reigns needs to start, I don't know....eating fucking turnbuckles and stalking Paige? Couldn't hurt....at least that way, he wouldn't have to talk, and even a guy as clearly unnatural on the mic as Reigns couldn't screw up "Mine!" could he?

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  59. Exactly. If they went that way with Reigns it'd get over because he has the physique and in-ring style to get the crowd into "rambling nutbag" who destroys opponents. They're trying to inorganically make him 'Cenarockherico' on the mic and it doesn't match with his personality. The best talkers are the ones that are naturally charismatic or funny in real life. Reigns doesn't strike me as the "funny one" of the Ol' Shield Beatles.

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  60. Get ready for him to cut a "You might be the King of Swing, but I'm the King of SCHWIIIING!" promo on Cesaro, then.

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  61. ThebrazilianpsychoJanuary 15, 2015 at 5:03 PM

    Like I said gentlemen, save your trash for the RR. Throw it if Roman wins.

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  62. No one does that anymore, which is kind of sad, in a way. I mean, I'm happy we've gone beyond acting like fuckin' chimps flinging shit as wrestling fans, but man....that means no more epic promos like Hogan's nWo turn, or ECW ONS when fans were throwing garbage at Big Show. Those instances made for great visuals.

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  63. Reigns is the dung beetle of that group.

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  64. ThebrazilianpsychoJanuary 15, 2015 at 5:09 PM

    Indeed Kovacs, Indeed. If Bryan wins, the crowd is gonna be so happy that they can tolerate a Cena/Orton match.

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  65. There wasn't much to work off of.

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  66. I really think it was borderline line close to trash being thrown after last year's Royal Rumble. ESPECIALLY if they stuck with the Orton/Batista plan.

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  67. Reigns reminds me of the awful cheesiness that was Big Sexy's 1996 run as champion. Complete fucking cheese.

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  68. I would legit laugh hard if that happened.

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  69. "Deal with it!"


    *Is hit in face with 40 oz. drink cup*


    Would have been epic.


    Anyone else remember when a fan pegged Nash square in the head with a beer cup on Nitro? That person had quite the aim.

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  70. Is Vince writing promos a new thing? I haven't heard of him actually writing promos before, just giving the wrestlers a general idea of what to say and leaving the writing to the actual writers. Could him writing these promos be a reaction to his Austin podcast, as in "I'm going to show these guys how to grab the brass ring and get over by writing them the best promos ever!"?

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  71. Doesn't the WWE throw people out for doing that? I can't remember that happening in a WWE ring, whereas it happened in WCW all the time.

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  72. Wrestlemania XVI ended with garbage raining down on Vince, Stephanie, and Triple H.

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  73. Considering how fast both Rock and Cena ran out of the ring at Wrestlemania 29, they were at least expecting it to happen.

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  74. I think you actually get arrested, in a lot of places now. Arena policy, not necessarily WWE's.

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  75. The duelling heyman/reigns promos could be... Interesting.

    How can you be full of suffering sucastash?

    Anyway, reform the shield after wrestlemania (where I assume Bryan wins the title back and sting kills off the authority) and reigns can be a heel for a bit and try again with a face turn!

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  76. Crockett Country had some experienced garbage throwers. The Braves could have used them.

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  77. Haven't been watching Raw, but I knew he sucked

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  78. Daniel Bryan had to get a comedy act with Kane and a fucking actor over. And he made it the hottest thing in wrestling. Roman Reigns can fuck right off. Can't get a shitty promo over? Sorry go wrestle in ROH where you can cut your own promo. Don't want to do that? See if your cousin can get you work in Hollywood. Can't do that? Get a fucking day job. I'm so sick of Reigns. Fuck him and Dean Ambrose. Hopefully via injury or drug suspension we are spared of them both for most of 2015.

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  79. Wow, I think you're overreacting. Did you have someone press on your tummy in high school? :)

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  80. Dude, wrestling is a frat boy mentality through and through. You don't even need to watch the shoots to see that.

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  81. What North American business isn't? Or at least started our that way? (Minus the barely closeted part)

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  82. I'm tired of people acting like the Team Hell No skits were chicken shit that Bryan singlehandedly turned into chicken salad. It was good material that both Bryan and Kane (and the dude who played Dr Shelby) did great stuff with.

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  83. So when Vince Jordan used to talk about the "blog is already turning on Roman Reigns" stuff, I am pretty sure these outbursts are what he was referring to. =)

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  84. I vaguely remember that. I DO remember during the Dibase/Virgil break up, someone beaned a nearly full drink in the back of Dibase's head.


    He didn't even flinch, but I laughed so hard seeing a SWARM of security guards rush by in the background among the crowd.

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  85. You are overrating the actual writing of that material.

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  86. If I wasn't lazy I would.

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  87. I never liked Reigns. I've never had much use for any of VKM's weird homoerotic big man pushes.

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  88. Imagine free drinks not being a top priority.

    What a misguided life you lead.

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  89. I've never understood this. My friends were just never the type to bust balls, so it's always weird for me to see groups who do that kind of thing regularly. And holy crap, I'd deck any friend that slapped a new tattoo of mine.

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  90. As soon as I found out it was a Vince idea, that's the first thing I thought of. I would be seriously disappointed if Vince wasn't a Three Stooges fan.

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  91. Think you hit the nail on the head here Bayless - really interesting mix of telling all but not being remotely bitter. This dynamic is very rare indeed - in fact, only Lance Storm's shoots spring to mind.

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  92. Batista's Jerichi Podcast appearance turned the tide for me. Came across as a good hearted, generous and down to earth guy through and through.

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  93. God, those Scrambles! I forgot all about those. Mental.

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  94. yeah, if Pik could stop Ctrl C + Ctrl V'ing this content..


    that'd be great

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  95. But this content is illuminating.

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  96. So you're saying "tl;dr"!?!

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  97. That is the best avatar.

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  98. Johnny Valentine put lighter fluid in someone's inhaler.

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  99. If all those hardcore title changes count as actual title reigns, so should the scramble title changes.

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  100. Just seeing something like him showing Gallows how to pull the Festus face and shouting at him for doing it wrong would be awesome.

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  101. Cranky Vince on Twitter always cheers me up.

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  102. Raven said he used him as his assistant booker so they could both hang out. Apparently Saundrs took it seriously and got head offices attention but then he didn't go over to shake Triple-H's, who was on crutches at the time, hand in a meeting so obviously his career in WWE ended shortly after.

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  103. To each his own, I guess. I can't imagine having a group of friends where you don't break each other's balls. What else is there to do, sit around and play video games all night long?

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  104. Maybe don't approach the two things as mutually exclusive...

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  105. It's like wrestling's answer to "Bye, Felicia."

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  106. So wait, is the difference between a worthwhile video game night and a worthless one just the ball-breaking, or does the ball-breaking lead to awesome stuff like gang fights and sweet dirtbike jumps?


    I don't know, man, we're big into weird cult movies, concerts, cartoons/anime, basketball (we're in SU country), board games (more the niche stuff you'd see at Board Game Geek). Hell, they even watch wrestling and go to wrestling shows with me every now and then. We never seem to run out of things to do, and it's relaxed. I like relaxed.

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  107. Not picking on you or your friends, like I said, to each his own. Trust me, relaxing and ball-breaking aren't mutually exclusive. Sitting around swapping stories, making jokes at each other's expense, and ripping some beers is as relaxing as it gets for me. I made the video game reference because it was the first thing that came to mind where people are hanging out but not directly interacting...and I can't picture interacting without ball-breaking. Especially with your oldest and closest friends.

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