Monday, March 23, 2015

10 MOVIES YOU’VE NEVER HEARD OF STARRING PRO WRESTLERS


http://www.ifc.com/fix/2013/04/10-movies-youve-never-heard-of-starring-pro-wrestlers

It is an an old list but I found it pretty interesting to find out that film snobs consider these "Movies you've never heard of" seeing as I had heard of all of them except the Trish Stratus one.

I have indeed heard of all those movies, and the WWE ones are only "obscure" in that no one went to see them.  They were all very heavily marketed flops for the most part.  The Marine remains a "so bad it's good" laugh-fest, the rest are pretty much straight-up terrible as noted in the article.  

95 comments:

  1. I am anticipating HHH's entrance now almost as much as anything on the show but you know Sting is going to have to bring a special one.

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  2. Was worried Wrong Side of Town might make this list but didn't. Such a fun bad movie starting RVD and Batista.

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  3. The Condemned was a good movie.

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  4. YankeesHoganTripleHFanMarch 23, 2015 at 1:02 PM

    Best wrestler movie cameo ever? Double J in Spring Breakers.

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  5. We are not movie snobs, therefore we have heard of these.

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  6. WE MAKE MOVIES
    *chews food*

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  7. The immortal question: in a battle between the Terminator and Robocop, will anyone below the age of 40 care?

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  8. Come to think of it, the same could be said about this match!

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  9. Few people remember Rocky 3 but that movie also featured an up and coming young wrestler named Terry Bollea.

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  10. HHH does the Terminator entrance, Sting comes out with Robocop, Reigns comes out with Sylvester

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  11. Is funny because classy people don't watch wrestling!

    IFC deserves the JBL shower treatment.

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  12. Fun fact: Randy Orton was slated to be the star of Marine 2 but cut because he actually went AWOL in real life and the studio was worried having the main star of your movie be a deserter would be a bad idea.

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  13. Sting will walk to the ring normally to his inferior knockoff theme and everybpdy will wonder why he has no heat. Hunter will use this as an excuse to call an audible and put himself over at Mania.

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  14. Too bad. Would have been a whole lot shorter.

    Besides, he was just going to the papers.

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  15. I thought so too. It certainly won't win any awards but I thought it was a decent action flick.

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  16. No mention of The Real Reason (Men Commit Crimes)? For shame.

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  17. I can think of decent/credible films that featured wrestlers:
    Ed wood
    Never say never again
    Indiana jones and last crusade
    Kes
    One dodgy one in the back of my mind was son of the mask, have a vague recollection of tiny lister being in it.
    What about tv shows featuring wrestlers? Hulk was in a team obviously, and terry funk was in an episode of quantum leap, any obscure shows featuring wrestlers?

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  18. Great fight scenes.

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  19. HHH coming out as Terminator chugging a Diet Dew is going to look great.

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  20. Austin had a pretty funny quote at the end too. After Vinnie Jone's character describes all of the crappy stuff that happened to him that turned him into a psychopath, Austin deadpans, "sounds like you've had a hard life. Good thing it's over".

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  21. ... I really hope Triple H doesn't recreate Arnold's "entrance" in Terminator 2.

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  22. Little off there. He was slated to be in Marine 2, but got injured. Then he was slated to be in Marine 3, but veterans groups raised concern about the AWOL issue. He ended up in 12 Rounds 2 instead... which was supposed to star CM Punk.

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  23. This list sucks

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  24. So if we are getting more corporate synergy with NBC properties, I can't wait to see the new stable of the "Blacklist" with Ziggler, Bryan, Cesaro and Ryder.


    How dare you get over on your own or shit on Cena/Orton CMXXVII.

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  25. Boy meets world had Vader
    That 70s show had Rock, Matt Hardy, and Ken Shamrock in one episode

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  26. Didn't the Bushwhackers show up on Family Matters?

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  27. Paradise Alley with Sylvester Stallone, Terry Funk and Tom Waits is awesomely stupid and should be on this list.

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  28. I'm just picturing Jack Donaghy telling Vince he wants Seinfeld inserted into all backstage segments.

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  29. TRIVIA: One of the producers of SANTA WITH MUSCLES was Jordan Belfort, AKA The Wolf of Wall Street:
    https://twitter.com/ChrisMcKit/status/546315981287878657

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  30. Because cocaine. Duh.

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  31. The Polish HammerMarch 23, 2015 at 2:15 PM

    I recently saw the absolutely awful River of Darkness starring Kurt Angle, Kevin Nash, Sid Vicious and Ray Lloyd (WCW's Glacier). Sat through the whole thing too because it was so stupefyingly bad, it was almost hypnotic.

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  32. The title alone sounds like an awful Apocalypse Now ripoff.

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  33. The Polish HammerMarch 23, 2015 at 2:18 PM

    It's worse than that. It's a "horror" movie with Nash & Sid as zombies, Angle as the town sheriff, and Glacier as a cook.

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  34. Why wasn't this in that movie? I'd love to see DiCaprio on the set of Santa with Muscles and thinking he'd win an Oscar for best picture or some shit.

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  35. I'm waiting for an episode of Grimm featuring the undertaker and Kane as two half dead zombies terrorizing Portland. I. This episode the Portland pd will have to bring in zombie hunter john cena to help them battle the brothers of destruction

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  36. According to the Twitter-er, "another exec producer of SANTA WITH MUSCLES (Danny Porush) was who Jonah Hill's character was based on"

    So imagine coked up DiCaprio and Hill acting alongside a coked-up Hogan in a Santa costume (Hogan playing himself, naturally). How can you top that?

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  37. Randy Savage was a voice on Space Ghost and King Kong Bundy was on Married with Children.

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  38. You can't -- that would've been amazing. Damn you Scorsese!

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  39. THUNDERLIPS~! THE ULTIMATE MALE~!

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  40. BONESAAAAAAAAWWWWW IIISSS REEEAAADDYYY~!

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  41. Adam "Colorado" CurryMarch 23, 2015 at 2:38 PM

    TMNT 2 briefly had Nash.

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  42. Maybe it's my pro wrestling bias, but I've heard of all ten of these... and seen five of them. Abraxxas is hilarious if you're into illogically scripted sci-fi.

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  43. ღαґ√ ḉґεṧтøMarch 23, 2015 at 2:38 PM

    Cena just finished a guess spot on Parks and Rec, Piper is all over Always Sunny in Philly

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  44. Harlan Leverage IIIMarch 23, 2015 at 2:40 PM

    I think HHH did an episode of The Drew Carey Show.

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  45. Terry Funk was the villain in ROADHOUSE.

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  46. Heard of all of them except the one with Trish. Which actually sounds better than the others already because at least it'll have some eye candy.


    They Live is the only non-Rock flick starring a wrestler that is watchable for me. Piper was the man.

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  47. The Orton one (That's What I Am) was okay.

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  48. A villain.


    Ben Gazzara was THE villain.


    And don't you forget it.

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  49. I'm sad - no love for King Kong Bunding co-starring in Moving.

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  50. did the Kane torture porn movie WWE studio made make the list?

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  51. Yeah, your second line totally doesn't support the first.

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  52. FAIL

    He took a sip of water

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  53. Santa with Muscles is still a better movie than Double Team.

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  54. Did Glacier know it was a movie or was he just showing up for work that day?

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  55. Is that the one where Nash and Sid are zombies? And wasn't Scott Hall in that too?

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  56. boy meets world episode had Vader kicking Jake the Snake's ass at MSG!

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  57. Orton had what amounted to a cameo in that movie, which probably explains why it is generally regarded as one of the better WWE films.

    That's not a knock against Orton, per se', but expecting a wrestler to carry an entire film while similarly expecting the film to be good is a quite a large undertaking.

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  58. http://youtu.be/e9EZaI8dmrs

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  59. ? What is torture porn?

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  60. No love for "Wrong Side of Town" with Rob Van Dam, Viscera and Bautista?

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  61. But Redd West was one of the heroes.

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  62. usually considered "horror" movies, stuff like the Saw series... WWE made one and spent 2+ months focusing all their airtime to hyping it... May 19

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  63. About the same number as those, below 30, who care about hhh\sting

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  64. No, tax reasons and similar to how/why MTV was created. The film they produce let's them, for lack of a better term, launder their money. Its not liquid, not considered an asset, was a low risk investment due to low budget...and on the off chance it became a successful film, they turn a profit. It was a common financial tactic. And I'm pretty sure that they didn't attend a single meeting, have a single set visit or even know who was cast. A lot like Viacom and MTV.


    "Too cash heavy, bloated; sitting there all puckered up. Index of numbers, scrolling up-screen, scrolling up."

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  65. ...not sure what you mean. I know what movie you're talking about, See No Evil (I saw the sequel only because I'm a huge fan of the Soska sisters) but it was a straight up slasher. Saw began as a who-done-it, sequels focused specifically on the creativity of the tortures inflicted and the pain that was being caused, and ended as a series that was interested in its ridiculous mythology.

    I mean, I can say the same about the original Elm St and Friday the 13th movies, which focused on the creativity of new death scenes.

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  66. 1/2 hour of entrances for a 1/2* match.

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  67. So JLaw is making one more appearance as Mystique and that's it for her.

    I wonder if that's it for the character, though

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  68. Not sure what fanbase that appeals to

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  69. That would have resulted in about 18 sequels, each one crappier than the one before it.

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  70. also one of the bodyguards in "Over the Top", a movie which I have always loved seen I have seen it first as a kid.

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  71. F'N Body Slams - Dan SelbyMarch 23, 2015 at 4:14 PM

    Bet Ryback is fucking cursing this news.


    Remember he was meant to have a 'Terminator style' gimmick? I always envisioned a really awesome entrance with shit loads of smoke.

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  72. And expose his roid-deflated package?

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  73. This is Reigns you're talking about. Do you mean Sylvester Stallone or Sylvester the cat ( "Sufferin' succotash!")?

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  74. But... what's the movie about??

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  75. After watching that I can see why RVD smashed so many Tables, he was jelous of their acting ability.

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  76. Santa's Slay is amusing enough.

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  77. Can't be worse than that movie where Kurt was a rapist.

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  78. ...not sure what you mean. I know what movie you're talking about, See No Evil (I saw the sequel only because I'm a huge fan of the Soska sisters) but it was a straight up slasher. Saw began as a who-done-it, sequels focused specifically on the creativity of the tortures inflicted and the pain that was being caused, and ended as a series that was interested in its ridiculous mythology.

    I mean, I can say the same about the original Elm St and Friday the 13th movies, which focused on the creativity of new death scenes

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  79. Eh, yeah, I don't really want him winning this year regardless, but at least if they reformed the shield, had heyman switch, have Reigns switch to Authority, or have Reigns and a Samoan Swat Team-ified Usos? At least they'd be trying

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  80. Fat, Ugly Inner-City SweathogMarch 23, 2015 at 7:18 PM

    Oh christ, another year where the heel (HHH) gets the big grand entrance. They better do something badass for Sting at least

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  81. Fat, Ugly Inner-City SweathogMarch 23, 2015 at 7:21 PM

    I am finding it more and more likely that HHH/Sting closes this show

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  82. Fat, Ugly Inner-City SweathogMarch 23, 2015 at 7:24 PM

    I would like to point out that this pulling-all-stops badass entrance they are planning is going to HHH....not their "next big thing" who is main eventing and probably winning the title.

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  83. Why did you post the same thing under 2 different accounts? Who has 2 accounts anyway? Loser.

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  84. Only fans of that crappy Super Nintendo game will care.

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  85. No lol or you mad. Definitely fake dougie.

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  86. So that's the Wrestlemania 31 finish then. ITS THE TERMINATOR BOB COME GET SOME NOW STING OOH WHAT STRENGTH

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  87. He actually worked that gimmick in OVW. Its what got him the WWE gig. He was much better before that when he'd bump around for anybody, but he left and came back as a no sell machine and Vince almost immimmediately hired him.

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  88. But why male models?

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  89. I meant that a series of Orton-Cena movies would mimic how crappy the Orton-Cena matches got after seeing them fight each other over and over and over.

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  90. That is awesome! Too funny!

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  91. Fuck you tramp

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  92. Took ya long enough.

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