Smackdown
Date:
March 12, 2015
Location:
Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators:
Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Jerry Lawler
Reviewed by Tommy Hall
It
should be interesting to see if this week's show continues
Smackdown's recent focus on the Intercontinental Title. After all
the weeks of World Title build on Raw, it's nice to have something a
bit different on the other show, if nothing else just to avoid the
fatigue of seeing the same things over and over again. Let's get to
it.
Opening
sequence.
Here's
Daniel Bryan to get things going. He thanks the fans for their
kindness and says he's been trying to ignore that Wrestlemania sign
since Fast Lane. It's become clear to him that he can't repeat what
happened last year at Wrestlemania, but when one door closes, another
door opens.
A
few weeks ago, he was surrounded by people fighting for the
Intercontinental Championship and it got him thinking about his
heroes. People like Mr. Perfect, Ricky Steamboat, Bret Hart, Shawn
Michaels and Randy Savage. When they were fighting for the
Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania, it was more exciting than
anything happening in the World Title division. Wrestlemania VIII
would disagree with you Bryan.
He's
officially in the ladder match this year though and the fans are very
pleased. This brings out Bad News Barrett who reminds us that he's
still the champion and will still be after Wrestlemania. Dolph
Ziggler comes out to disagree but he does say Bryan is his hero.
Barrett may be the champion but he can't even hang onto the belt.
How could he possibly do that with six other guys throwing him off
ladders at Wrestlemania?
Cue
Harper to say he wants his Wrestlemania moment. That sounds so wrong
coming from someone like Harper. He should be more like old school
Cactus Jack who just does stuff for the sake of violence. Dean
Ambrose comes out to a very loud reaction to say every one of them
should be locked up if they think they can fight without inviting
him. He even knows a good place they can be held for observation if
need be.
Now
it's Stardust who grabs a mic and looks under the ring for the white
stallion of the Milky Way. He wants the ivory enterprise, but
instead gets R-Truth with the burlap sack. Truth pulls out the belt
and calls it a beaut. He thinks the title has been passed around
enough so he's going to hold it until Wrestlemania when he climbs
that ladder. Barrett cuts him off but Truth calls him sizzle chest.
A brawl finally breaks out and it's Ziggler, Ambrose and Bryan left
standing.
Usos/New
Day vs. Tyson Kidd/Cesaro/Los Matadores
Big
E. is on the floor this time and Los Matadores confirm their heel
turn in an inset interview where they say they'll do whatever it
takes to have their Wrestlemania moment. Not win the titles mind you
but have their moment. Kofi and Diego get things going with the
masked man stomping away in the corner. Kingston dropkicks him down
for two and it's quickly off to Woods. The intelligence doesn't seem
warmed up yet as Diego drags him into the corner for the tag to
Fernando.
Jimmy
tags himself in, much to Woods' annoyance. Hey dude get over it.
You kind of suck in the ring. Diego offers a distraction to break up
the Whisper in the Wind and Jimmy gets crotched on the top. We take
a break and come back with with Diego jumping on Jimmy's back on the
ropes and putting on a chinlock. Jerry: “What do you call a
matador with a rubber toe? Roberto!” Jimmy fights up and makes
the hot tag to Jimmy, leaving Cesaro to yell at Los Matadores.
Jey
starts cleaning house but Kofi tags himself in for a springboard
cross body for two on Kidd. Some heel miscommunication sends them to
the floor and the good guys bust out dives, only to have Woods land
on Jey. Again, he's not that bright. Cesaro uppercuts Kofi through
the ropes and Kidd loads up the fisherman's neckbreaker, only to have
Fernando tag himself in. Diego sneaks in with a Backstabber for the
pin on Kofi at 8:40.
Rating:
C+. This did its job and that's
almost all you can ask for out of a match like this. I'm
assuming it's another multi-team match at Wrestlemania, just like
last year, but I'm not sure this one is going to be as good. It also
says something that the Usos and Los Matadores are still in the
match, just like Cesaro but with a different partner. You would
think something would have changed by now. Still
though, good way to set things up here.
Video
on Sting vs. HHH.
Recap
of Rusev vs. Cena from Monday.
Miz
lists off his career accomplishments and says winning the battle
royal will be the latest entry on that list. Mizdow is worried that
Miz can't beat Ryback tonight so Miz tells him to stay in the back,
press his pants and get him a drink that is way too complicated to
type.
Miz
vs. Ryback
Ryback
will have none of the sunglasses being taken off so he puts Miz on
the top rope. A delayed suplex brings Miz right back down but he
hammers Ryback into the ropes to take over. The fans want Mizdow as
Ryback blocks a running boot and plants Miz with a spinebuster. The
Meat Hook and Shell Shock are good for the pin at 2:59. Ryback's
push continues to look strong.
Mizdow
chuckles in the back.
Here's
Roman Reigns to respond to Paul Heyman's comments from Raw. We get a
quick clip of Heyman talking about Lesnar destroying Rock, Undertaker
and Cena and promising Brock will do the same thing and worse to
Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania. Reigns says Heyman thinks he knows his
family but he's just disrespecting them. Heyman thinks Reigns is
three generations removed from cannibalism? Who thinks that? Reigns
won't take someone disrespecting his family and telling him he can't
when he can. He'll win at Wrestlemania and do his family proud.
This
brings out a slightly thinner Mark Henry, who thinks Reigns is either
trying to be funny or he's been hit in the head by one too many
coconuts. He doesn't like anyone talking about his heritage but
Reigns needs to understand that Heyman has gotten under his skin.
Mark knows who he is, and he's been in the ring with Lesnar. Brock
nearly killed him with the F5 on the floor and Mark doesn't think
Roman is ready for that.
Roman
says with all due respect but Mark cuts him off and says Reigns has
to earn respect around here. That's enough for Roman as he goes to
walk away but Mark spins him around and yells at Reigns for being a
young buck that thinks he knows it all. That earns him a Superman
Punch and a spear through the barricade.
Reigns
is tired of hearing he can't, because he can and he will. Believe
that. The family heritage idea is better than nothing but it's still
not much of a connection to a guy like Reigns. However, being tired
of being told he can't do something and proving people wrong IS
something people can connect to and the idea they probably should
have gone for months ago.
We
look back at Bray Wyatt's speech from Monday and Undertaker lighting
the chair on fire to accept the challenge.
AJ
Lee/Paige vs. Summer Rae/Cameron
Paige
is so excited for this match that she took off the white shirt under
her jacket between the walk through the back and the entrances. The
Bellas are on commentary as you would probably expect. Paige kicks
Cameron in the ribs to start and it's off to AJ in about five
seconds. AJ goes after Summer on the apron and gets nailed from
behind by Cameron.
With
two weeks before Wrestlemania, the Bellas are bragging about the
ratings for Total Divas. Summer puts AJ in a chinlock as they
FINALLY start talking about the upcoming tag match. Paige gets the
tag and cleans house with her set of clotheslines, setting up the PTO
for the tap out from Summer at 2:25.
Paige
and AJ yell at the Bellas post match. My guess is they're saying
“TALK ABOUT WRESTLING! YOU'RE WRESTLERS!”
We
look back at Reigns and Henry in case we have the attention span of a
goldfish.
Henry
says Reigns has made a believer out of him. He doesn't think Reigns
will beat Lesnar, but now he believes Reigns can. It's a shame this
wasn't Sexual Chocolate as the old Henry would have certainly hit on
Renee in her stomach revealing top here. Very fetching indeed.
We
look at a Cricket Wireless event with Dolph Ziggler. He's bringing
some kids to Smackdown to be ringside.
Low
and behold, the kids are here.
This
week's sitdown interview is with Randy Orton. He looks at the
footage of Rollins curb stomping him a few months back and says that
night changed him. We see him returning at Fast Lane but that wasn't
the best way to get his revenge. Instead he wove his way back into
the Authority to gain their trust. This is really, really not making
this horrible story make more sense.
He
used Reigns to get closer to Rollins and this past Monday was reverse
psychology. Apparently in WWE, reverse psychology is code for REALLY
STUPID STORY. Orton explained getting rid of everyone else in the
Authority, even though he had almost nothing to do with getting rid
of Big Show or Mercury. Basically all he did was punch Noble.
Then
he walked away from the tag and had fun beating Rollins up. Orton
loved every single bit of hurting Rollins this past Monday and he let
all of it out. He's ready for the Authority's retribution and is
ready to challenge Rollins for Wrestlemania. Good for you Randy.
You had a stupid plan in a stupid story that makes no sense when you
actually think about it, but good for you.
Daniel
Bryan/Dolph Ziggler/Dean Ambrose vs. Luke Harper/Bad News
Barrett/Stardust
Unfortunately
no Truth on commentary here. Ambrose headlocks Barrett to start and
runs him over with a running forearm. Off to Stardust vs. Ziggler
with the painted one taking over in the corner. Cole talks about
Stardust being like Gollum with the Intercontinental Title. To mix
things up a bit, Saxton thinks Stardust is acting like Kim
Kardashian. I'm going to move on to Bryan putting Stardust in the
surfboard instead as it's less painful than talking about that
disturbing, hideous, nightmare inducing creature. It's easier than
talking about Gollum too.
Stardust
gets out and hammers on Bryan in the corner but gets taken down by a
hurricanrana. The threat of a running knee sends Stardust running to
the floor and we take a break. Back with Harper Gator Rolling Bryan
before it's off to Barrett for some forearms to the in the corner.
Bryan finally kicks Harper away and the hot tag brings in Ambrose to
clean house. An atomic drop into a faceplant gets two on Stardust
and everything breaks down.
Ambrose
cleans house and dives onto Harper and Stardust for a big crash.
Barrett breaks up Dirty Deeds on Stardust and Harper kicks Dean in
the face as we take another break. Back again with Barrett kicking
Dean in the face for two. That seems so familiar. Bad News'
chinlock doesn't go anywhere and Stardust's top rope superplex does
just as poorly. Instead Ambrose nails a top rope dropkick and makes
the tag to Ziggler.
Harper
comes in as well and eats a dropkick followed by the Fameasser for
two. Everything breaks down again and the good guys load up a triple
dive but Harper nails Ziggler to break up a third of it. The Batista
Bomb gets two on Dolph but he comes back with a Zig Zag, followed by
the running knee to give Bryan the pin at 17:38.
Rating:
B. Nice long tag match here to
close out the show. When a show is built around talking like this
one was, you almost have to give them something like this to affirm
that it's really a wrestling show. Above
all though, Barrett didn't get pinned! That's one whole show in a
row and possibly a new record for him.
Cole
congratulates Bryan on the win but Ziggler jokes that Bryan stole the
pin from him. Last year
Bryan had luck on his side but this year Ziggler is going to be out
there with him. Dean chimes in and says Dolph stole the show, just
like everyone has been stealing the title lately. Maybe
Dolph thinks he isn't quite as good as Bryan and it bothers him.
Dean
says the people in the locker room know the truth about Bryan: he's,
shall we say, human waste.
Ambrose goes to leave and
Ziggler agrees with him, leaving Bryan in the ring alone. I
really, really hope they don't turn Bryan heel but it seems to be the
only thing left for him to do at this point.
Overall
Rating: C. We're
definitely in the last push to Wrestlemania, which means expect
several shows like this in a row: mostly talk and hype with a token
long match for most of the wrestling content. Reigns sounded fine
and it's good that they're FINALLY giving him a reason to want to
fight Brock.
On
the other hand, Orton sounded like a crazy man trying to explain a
stupid story. Either bring
him back as a full on psycho or bring him back as part of the
Authority without the Fast Lane attack. What they went with makes it
seem like they were just hoping people weren't paying attention,
though given how this build has been going, they might be onto
something.
Results
Los
Matadores/Cesaro/Tyson Kidd b. New Day/Usos – Backstabber to
Kingston
Ryback
b. Miz – Shell Shock
AJ
Lee/Paige b. Summer Rae/Cameron – PTO to Summer
Dean
Ambrose/Dolph Ziggler/Daniel Bryan b. Luke Harper/Stardust/Bad News
Barrett – Running knee to Harper
Remember to check out my website at kbwrestlingreviews.com and head over to my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:
http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6
"On the other hand, Orton sounded like a crazy man trying to explain a stupid story."
ReplyDeleteWell, it IS...
Lo and behold
ReplyDeleteThey're finally booking Reigns the way he should've been booked since returning but sadly it seems the damage has been done.
ReplyDeleteI think if we can get over the fact that it's not who should be in the main event, we should be able to recognize that starting with the Reigns/Bryan feud they've kinda been nailing the Reigns/Lesnar build. Of course, having Heyman cutting promos is kinda like a cheat code for any storyline, but still.
ReplyDeleteWhat I took away from the show was this....Bryan's a turd!
ReplyDeleteGotta say it like Shelly in South Park. 'Shtupid turrrrrd'
ReplyDeleteSo basically the main event story is all about how there's no way the challenger can win. It could have made a good story for someone smaller than Reigns.
ReplyDeleteAfter watching Extreme Rules '12 the other day for the first time in awhile...I'm cool with a Bryan heel turn. He's been a heel for a huge chunk of his career and he's an awesome one.
ReplyDeleteIt's not like Reigns is a huge guy.
ReplyDeleteI haven't watched this show in years.
ReplyDeleteOn an unrelated note, while I have no issue with your recap I must disagree with most of your opinions
I dunno...Bitter Heel Bryan wouldn't be the worst thing.
ReplyDeleteWhen Brock Lesnar is the guy you're chasing, I'm cool with it. Now if it were Seth Rollins or the Miz, yeah, Reigns is laughably bigger than them and it would be ridiculous.
ReplyDeleteIt would definitely complete the Zack Ryder'ing of Bryan. By that, I don't mean bury him completely out of the TV product, but to knock him back into place and murder crowd reactions for him.
ReplyDeleteWrestlers used to fight about something, now it's all about Wrestlemaniw moments. There's something wrong about that.
ReplyDeleteNothing wrong with that.
ReplyDeleteI hate it. I know everyone mocks pointing at the sign, but it's so stupid. I don't care about their moments, or whoever's 'legacy'.
ReplyDeleteWhether they're good builds or not, I'd say Sting/HHH, Reigns/Lesnar, Cena/Rusev and Taker/Wyatt all have clearly defined motivations beyond a mere "Wrestlemania moment."
ReplyDeleteI get the feeling that Orton coming back and destroying the Authority with RKO's in one tremendous moment would probably have gotten him way over, and there is no way that can happen when the writing team has other plans.
ReplyDeleteInstead, he works his way back into the Authority with a business meeting, then proceeds to play mind games with Seth Rollins.
It's true: no one is allowed to possibly transcend the brand like Austin or Rock did.
True but I will be happy if no one ever points to that sign ever again.
ReplyDeleteI feel like it's almost self-referential or tongue-in-cheek at this point, though. I didn't watch or record Smackdown tonight (nor have I been paying as close of attention as years past on general) but I also can't remember it being done all that much so far this year.
ReplyDeleteExcept it won't turn him heel with most of the crowd. It's bitter heel Punk all over again. Just like "heel" Punk ruined Sheamus, "heel" Bryan will do it to these guys.
ReplyDeletelol wut ?
ReplyDeleteThe booking for the IC match went something like this:
ReplyDeleteWWE rep: OK so next on the list we got... oh wow. Vince there are a ton of people who don't have a match.
Vince: So? Put them in the Andre thing.
WWE rep: Yeah, but these are guys who are popular... or at least were popular until you, um, started giving your input about what they should do...
Vince: Hmm... put them in the Forever Midcard title match.
WWE rep: You mean the IC belt?
Vince: Yeah I think so. They all just kind of blur together now.
The Raw guy wish he could do reviews like these
ReplyDeleteYou don't remember the champ vs champ stuff they did with Sheamus and Punk? It went so well for Sheamus they took the belt off him and never gave it back.
ReplyDeleteI thought you didn't like Tommy Hall
ReplyDeleteI think he hates Andy more.
ReplyDeleteWell, they've finally decided on Reigns' story. I don't know if I get it though.
ReplyDeleteI think my major issue with WWE is that wrestlers win and wrestlers lose, but rarely do they feel like natural results from their character's strengths and weaknesses. Cesaro is demonstrably stronger, more athletic and a better technician than Dean Ambrose, but Dean will swamp him with his shitty lariat because Dean's booked to win. His moves 'hurt' more because he's a babyface and Cesaro is going to lose.
But just as there are wrestlers who are so offensively weak it breaks the suspension of disbelief for them to win (Ziggler, Miz, Ambrose, Stardust) so are there wrestlers who are portrayed so dominantly it doesn't make sense for them to lose. Roman Reigns is one of those wrestlers. He jumps higher, he punches harder, he runs faster and takes more abuse than everybody else. He was the brute of the Shield. He's rarely, if ever, defeated in singles competition. He went up against the best technical wrestler in the company (shoot and worked) and powered through his technical chops to cut him in half with a spear. Roman Reigns is unbeatable so what's the point of the "Can he beat Brock?" story? There's no way for him to lose, and while yeah, I guess that's how wrestling traditionally works the deal seems so boring.
Should there be unstoppable characters in wrestling? Yes, but that shouldn't be EVERY top guys gimmick. Brock Lesnar suplexes you like normal men take out the trash. John Cena is unbreakable. Rusev CRUSH all opposition. When Sheamus comes back he's going to kick everybody's head in. Roman Reigns as another unstoppable wrestler is...ugh...because when you have them lose it isn't just a clever opponent taking advantage or anything else, it's them being worse at what they're supposed to be. If Cena is just more UNSTOPPABLE than Rusev than what does Rusev have left?
I guess what I'm saying is that there should be a viable and character related way for every wrestler to win a match, but also there should be a way for every wrestler to lose a match. Dean Ambrose is crazy and tough and unpredictable, but also can be easily trapped and tricked if you can survive his flurry as his erratic actions leave himself vulnerable to exploitation. Throw him against Ziggler, who's quick and technical but his obsession with being an "entertainer" causes him to take unnecessary risks. Wrestling is always at it's best when the matches reflect the conflict between the characters, and good characters have both strengths and weaknesses.
"You can't beat Lesnar" has pretty much been Reigns's story since the Rumble (Fast Lane interlude notwithstanding), so it's not as though Creative finally hit on it.
ReplyDeleteHonestly I keep track of what's going on through reading this blog rather than watching the actual product. I prefer it that way.
ReplyDeleteDon't forget about the turd sandwich.
ReplyDeleteSounds like a Dragon Gate title
ReplyDeleteAnd the other goob even more.
ReplyDeleteMatt?
ReplyDeleteMan, everybody has ultra WASP-y names. Tommy, Scott, Matt, Andy, Danielle...
Except...who are the faces to cheer for?
ReplyDeleteThey had one...
People aren't cheering for Roman Reigns. They're not going to cheer for Randy Orton doing anything but hitting the RKO out of nowhere on someone. I don't think they're really cheering for Dean Ambrose at this point. They know that cheering for Dolph Ziggler is pointless.
Who are the faces worth cheering for? Undertaker? Ryback?
This is why John Cena has job security. :(
This. A million times this.
ReplyDeleteThanks.
ReplyDeleteI just think there's way more drama when you can compare the strengths and weaknesses of wrestlers and get into serious arguments about who could win. Nerds talking about Batman fighting Superman is fun because you know what each guy can do and you can make arguments about what's stronger (ruthless cunning or raw power?)
Let's take NXT for example with Finn Balor vs. Kevin Owens. Kevin's bigger, stronger and more vicious. But Finn has the advantage of speed and technique, plus he knows Kevin's style. Also, will Finn's warpaint be able to psychologically counter the mind games of the champ?
Psychology is such an important part of wrestling, and while the in-ring talent will try their hardest to utilize it, it helps if the out of ring stuff supports it as well. Don't just say "Wrestler X is tough" say "Wrestler X has a great chin, so I don't think strikes will be able to put him down". Talk about how dangerous their moves are and what about them makes them so dangerous "That spinebuster will knock all the wind right out of you".
Or let's say you have two technical guys going at it, both with powerful submission finishers. You want to be able to find a way for the fans to differentiate them so maybe you promote how both holds might be equally painful but one is versatile in where it comes from allowing the wrestler to surprise you with it and the other submission is inescapable. You just found a way to give both guys more to their in-ring character and you gave the audience something to care about and get attached to.
I mean...I'm sure wrestlers think about this shit.
ReplyDeleteI'm not a boxing fan or a religious MMA disciple (or a sports guy at all, really). But don't sportsteams and fighters have particular strengths and weaknesses? Floyd Mayweather is a great defensive fighter, Muhammad Ali had the rope-a-dope, Cro Crop had the head kick, Tyson had the liver punch (right?), Ronda Rousey has her armbar, certain pitchers have their curve ball, Pele had his backflip kick, the Patriots have cheating.
I think John Cena would be much more likable if they explained why he was so dominant in more articulate a manner than "He Never Gives Up".
I'm a WASP?
ReplyDeleteThis has nothing to do with hashtags and things trending, thus is irrelevant to the show.
ReplyDeleteIn all seriousness though, good post.
The problem is that they want their chosen ones to get the biggest reactions, but they have been booked so poorly that the reactions aren't there. Their solution to this problem is not to book their chosen ones better so they get better pops, but rather to make anyone under them look even worse in comparison. It's mind-boggling - they routinely cut off their nose to spite their face, and no one gets over.
ReplyDeleteVince must be thrilled that February is over and now he can book all the black guys to lose and get beat up all the time again.
ReplyDeleteThat requires announcers who are actually directed to call matches, not just meaningless banter and catchphrases like "building momentum" (like seriously what does that mean).
ReplyDeleteSweet, it's about time they switched to the family heritage angle that so successfully launched Rock's career.
ReplyDeleteWasn't that like one match on RAW or SD? I doubt they'd take the belt off him for that.
ReplyDeleteYeah, he's pretty much Orton's size. Hell, he's slightly shorter and since his return from injury, has the same build (whereas he used to be bulkier).
ReplyDeleteWASPily named, if nothing else.
ReplyDeleteDon't worry, I share the same fate.
Well, I think building momentum is being on offense.
ReplyDeleteIf a guy punches you in the face, you're going to be reeling for a bit, allowing the guy to suplex you, then after the breath's been knocked out, he can drop an elbow or something.
I think the idea is that as you get on offense the other guy is more stunned/weakened/discombobulated which allows you to hit more elaborate moves, than when the tide of the match shifts and the guy who's been beaten on attempts to get back in control they not only have to hit their own move, they have to fight through the asskicking they've been getting.
Of course that would rely on some sort of fighting from underneath wrestling happening instead of the generic, insipid babyface comebacks we normally get (elbow out of chinlock, clothesline, clothesline, dropkick).
Maybe the announcers should actually call the matches rather than just repeating the same meaningless catchphrases over and over again (I mean "creating separation" is even more meaningless than "building momentum").
ReplyDeleteI guess creating separation is getting yourself a reprieve from a beating? A desperation dropkick or a belly-to-back out of a headlock or something.
ReplyDeleteI agree that the lines have been repeated to a point of meaninglessness but there core ideas in them, that one wrestler has an advantage over another wrestler and a wrestler will sometimes manage to buy themselves a little time to recover, are a part of calling the match.
The issue with the announcing is that it's like a video game, they're randomly calling out buzzwords instead of responding to what people are saying and doing.
A teacher of mine once explained that theater is less 'talking and listening' and more 'listening and talking', it's not acting, it's reacting that makes it interesting. A guy going in there and doing his moves and the other guy doing his moves and the three old dudes yelling random shit isn't nearly as interesting as two people attempting to beat each other, fighting over each move and the commentary responding to each one as they relate to everything that's happening "That German Suplex landed Bryan right on his bad neck, I don't know how many more of those he can take!" is far better than "Whattamaneuver!"
It seems like simple shit to me.
Main Event.
ReplyDeleteWe can't turn Cena heel! He sells too much merch! He's too inspirational to children! He's a hard worker!
ReplyDeleteBryan inspired the kid who will be in the hall of fame! He's popular with the fans! He sells t-shirts and tickets and PPVs! He's a turd! Turn him heel!