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The SmarK Rant for WCW Monday Nitro–05.06.96

The SmarK Rant for WCW Monday Nitro – 05.06.96

I decided to use my WWE Network “Thank You” credit of $25 to pick up the Best of Sting on Blu-Ray. No idea what’s on it. But I enjoy the work of Sting and wish him to get royalties, and it was free, so there you go.

The Network is buffering and lagging like CRAZY for me the past couple of days, by the way. It’s not even watchable on Xbox One and on Roku it stops to load for minutes. Hopefully they get this shit fixed by Wrestlemania.

Live from Daytona Beach, FL

Your hosts are Eric Bischoff, Bobby Heenan & Mongo

Hugh Morrus v. Randy Savage

Hugh attacks on the floor and bullies Savage into the railing, then pounds away on the floor while allegedly making racist remarks. Into the ring, Morrus steals his coat and sexually harasses people at the same time, but this upsets Savage and he writes a scathing letter to HR before choking Morrus down. And he keeps choking until the ref calls for the DQ at about 2:00, although I don’t think there was ever really a match per se. Savage drops the elbow of justice on Morrus and forces him to resign, and then beats the hell out of the referee as well. STOP RINGING THE DAMN BELL. Local law enforcement comes out to arrest Morrus for his bullshit training methods, but he’s already gone so they haul Savage away instead.

RIP, Ray Stevens. And then he gets screwed out of his Hall of Fame spot this year.

Dean Malenko v. Jushin Liger

So apparently Shinjiro Ohtani has won the (fictitious) Cruiserweight title tournament and will be defending against someone at Slamboree. That didn’t actually happen. Liger is in the badass black and silver costume tonight, but he’s playing babyface. They trade wristlocks and Liger kicks Malenko to the floor while a tuxedo-clad Ric Flair take a seat and watch the match. Liger with a senton for two and a brainbuster for two, and we take a break. Back with Flair spending EXORBINANT amounts of Randy Savage’s money via champagne and probably the really good coke backstage, too. Meanwhile, Malenko works a toehold on Liger and goes to work on the leg. Liger comes back with a spinkick and a superplex attempt, but Dean bails and Liger hits him with a dive from the top instead. Liger tries a handspring and Dean catches him and it turns into a series of pin attempts, but Liger goes up again. Malenko cuts him off with the EXPLODING GUTBUSTER OF DEATH and follows with a powerbomb, but Liger reverses THAT for two. Dean with a Ligerbomb of his own to finish at 6:51. Oh man, they were just getting into it, too! ***1/2

Ric Flair wants us to know that he’ll be getting his title back, and don’t worry about the price of the champagne, since Randy Savage has lots of money left. Also, Mongo’s wife will likely be in his limo afterwards, if you know what he means.

Lord Steven Regal v. Sting

Sting quickly takes him down and tries the Scorpion, but Regal makes the ropes and bails, as we take a break. Back with Sting (in very REGAL purple and gold tonight) working a headlock and going after the arm, but Regal takes him down with his own wristlock. Why exactly does Sting have a big “29” on his tights, by the way? Is this some sort of football deal? No, wait, Bischoff clarifies that it’s the number of the WCW car, which is infinitely lamer. Sting comes back and misses the Stinger splash, but reverses a butterfly suplex for the pin at 6:45 instead. Sting busted out some pretty inventive finishes around this time. **1/4

WCW World title: The Giant v. Hacksaw Duggan

Sadly, Lex Luger is having vehicle trouble and was unable to show up for the match he apparently begged for, so Duggan offered to step up. Duggan attacks on the way into the ring and that goes nowhere, as Giant gives him the Nash choke in the corner to take over. Giant pounds him with shoulderblocks in the corner and Duggan bails. Back in, Giant misses a charge and Duggan goes for the tape, but the chokeslam finishes at 3:13. A series of mega-geeks run out to try and save Duggan, and it’s CHOKESLAMS FOR EVERYONE. Finally Flair leaves his fancy meal and cracks a chair over Giant’s head, and Sting joins him and helps to bring Giant down to set up their title match at Slamboree. Finally after all that, Luger arrives late and has HARSH WORDS for the Giant rather than actually hitting him. Hey, words can hurt, too. Not as much as Luger’s ugly Zubaz wardrobe here, but they HURT.

The Pulse

All good stuff this week.

Comments

  1. Wait...how do you get a thank you credit?

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  2. gotta be scott keith

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  3. kbwrestlingreviewsMarch 11, 2015 at 11:48 PM

    I think it was for people who signed up on day one last year. I got one as well.

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  4. Yeah, I got one too.

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  5. The #29 on Sting's tights was the number of the WCW NASCAR car

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  6. I should at least get something for not cancelling after the Rumble.

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  7. Talk about a layup getting to review a Hugh Morrus match this week.

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  8. I saw an email from WWE last week and immediately junked it. Glad I read this review and recovered my $25 credit. Macho Man purple shirt acquired. Success.

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  9. Damn, a 15-20 minutes Malenko/Liger match could've hit ***** around this time.

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  10. Yup, as Scott said in the review.

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  11. Huh, thats what I get for skimming

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  12. I wish I were Scott Keith. Or if I can't be Scott Keith... Batman.

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  13. I have been signed up since day 1 and all I got was a stupid WWE Emoji email. -_-

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  14. I'm pretty sure I was signed up on day 1 and I didn't get anything to my associated email address. I wonder what's up...

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  15. make 99$ hourly@58:<-Let's start work by Google!!Yes,this is definitely the most financialy rewarding I've had . Last Monday I bought a great Lotus Elan after I been earnin $9534 this-last/5 weeks and-a little over, $10k lass month . . I started this four months/ago and immediately started to bring home minimum $97 per/hr ... I work ->

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    ReplyDelete
  16. Glad I'm not the only one who's been dealing with this buffering madness. One thing I don't get about it is when I pause it for a few minutes, it should be loading the video thus making it unlikely to buffer (like YouTube and every other streaming service in the world). Yet when I do that, it still freaking buffers within seconds.

    This is the only service I know of that's ever done that, even The GiddyUp Network is more stable than the WWE Network at this point.

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  17. Because if the bell rings, it means, that you have to stop beating. ;)

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  18. Battle Kat LitterMarch 12, 2015 at 4:01 AM

    I miss Hogan

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  19. Battle Kat LitterMarch 12, 2015 at 4:05 AM

    I like it. It's old school. "Hey there young man, the match is over don't you know!"

    Always better with Gorilla on commentary talking about fines and suspensions. I loved that realistic element. I miss it :(

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  20. Battle Kat LitterMarch 12, 2015 at 4:44 AM

    Interesting.

    But what do you think about THE GIANT? I think he's got a big future in wrestling. Frying pan sized hands, they say.

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  21. Buffalo HopscotchMarch 12, 2015 at 5:10 AM

    I've been getting it too. Never had a problem before only in the last month or so it's been doing it. Never have any issues with Netflix or YouTube.

    ReplyDelete
  22. bell ringing is old school, before everything televised and monitors the bell ringing is suppose to signal officials backstage that something is going wrong in the ring

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  23. there are enough "reviewers" on this site already wishing they were Keith

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  24. "Lukewarm" MrJustinBMarch 12, 2015 at 5:25 AM

    So, Chris Pine's name is being floated around in an unsubstantiated Hal Jordan rumor.

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  25. Nah, the name's holding him back. Whoever heard of a great wrestler nicknamed "the Giant"? He needs to have a name that truly demonstrates how big he is on the show.

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  26. There's an episode of Saturday Night where the main event was supposed to be Hogan/Savage against Shark and I think Barbarian? It deteriorated into a huge brawl and the timekeeper continuously rang the bell the entire time. It was hilarious.

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  27. "Local law enforcement comes out to arrest Morrus for his bullshit training methods, but he’s already gone so they haul Savage away instead."


    LOL

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  28. I forgot how awesome Luger was during this time.

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  29. I signed up in the first few minutes, before the server issurs even. I didn't get one either, but i did let it lapse aftet 6 months, until re-signings recently. That's probably why i didn't get one

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  30. It was such a shame they turned him into bland super-face as soon as the nWo hit. He was still massively over though

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  31. I was signed up for exactly one month and got the same one.

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  32. Starting WrestleMania 13 now

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  33. Well gee WWE could you have made it less obvious you were using a 24/7 copy for this show?

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  34. Furnas & Lafon's entrance music is that shitty song they used for Raw in late '95.

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  35. I wondered at the time if Luger was going to turn at Bash at the Beach since he did jump from WWF and he spent most of the time since coming back to WCW playing both sides of the fence. I wondered if the injury spot was going to set him coming back out and going heel. Of course it worked out better with Hulk turning.

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  36. Just realized I was posting these to the wrong thread. Sorry Scott!

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  37. Same. Got me a Rusev shirt. Though I shoulda waited cause judging by Monday they'll be on clearance soon. :P

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  38. Stranger in the AlpsMarch 12, 2015 at 7:50 AM

    I'm going to start using REM songs before making my move. So here's goes:

    BANNED IN THE PLACE THAT YOU WERE!

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  39. Most interesting note in the Observer this week:

    "The Punisher, who I believe his real name is Ben Buchanan, and Dwayne Johnson, the son of Rocky Johnson and grandson of Peter Maivia, were both signed to developmental contracts. The developmental deals basically pay the guys $300 or so per week to augment their income while gaining experience, which in each's case will likely be in the USWA."



    I see good things ahead for Bull Buchanan.

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  40. That's. Bs, where is mine

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  41. Stranger in the AlpsMarch 12, 2015 at 8:20 AM

    I signed up on day one. At first, I received an email with an "exclusive emoji" and did not bite on that. A few days later I received the $25 offer. I picked up the Sheamus superstars collection DVD and The Undertaker: The Streak 4 disc set, which was already slashed in price.

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  42. Bret V Austin is my favorite match of all time. I still rewatch it a few times a year just to soak in the awesomeness. The rest of the show is shit literally bc of Sids tights in his match vs Taker.

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  43. I would have marked out if Luget had come back in American trunks with Scotty Riggs waving a flag.

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  44. Yeah. He should be holding the belt and body slamming that stinky, nasty, wary-infested giant back into the minor leagues, brother.

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  45. AverageJoeEverymanMarch 12, 2015 at 9:08 AM

    Imagine the buzz in the IWC if Sparky Plugg had jumped ship to drive the WCW Race Car.

    ReplyDelete
  46. *crickets*

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  47. the "Best of Sting" release is fine, especially if you're getting it "for free".

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  48. You had to believe Vince Russo was seeing what they were doing with Randy Savage here and taking notes of the crowd reactions to it.

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  49. Theberzerker, #1 HUSS CHOMPIONMarch 12, 2015 at 9:36 AM

    Will LOVE to see a rant of the Sting collection, because it's got some hidden gems on there like a match with Flair BEFORE Clash I, and Saturday Night ones against Muta, Vader, Austin, and Barry Windham I think. It's odd b/c there are very few "big" matches or famous ones from PPV that I think they're saving for a 2nd set, but as for rare unseen stuff it's pretty cool.

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  50. Glad i read these Nitro reviews and read all the comments. Checked my junk folder, and viola! 25 bucks off. Sting blu-ray for me as well!

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  51. I do a positive, Hogan loving Scott Keith gimmick.

    And the massive power of Hogan dead-lifting 500 pound King Kong Bundy before power slamming him down to the ground - clown.

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  52. Where the H is my $25 credit? I was a sub from day 1...

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  53. Luger was probably more over than ever in his career during the first half of 1997. Just a mega face.

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  54. I got the credit too and I don't believe I signed up day one, but it had to at least been the first week. Haven't decided what I want yet.

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  55. So that was the match where that apparently happened? Was that ever confirmed in any way or just a bad internet story?

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  56. It wasn't for lack of trying, that guy hung around awhile.

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  57. And won the match for the Outsiders by count out.

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  58. I heard that was a house show match and not WM13

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  59. Fun Fact: Speaking of Sting and football. His son, Steven Borden plays tight end for the University of Kentucky.

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