Sunday, June 14, 2015

Lightning Round: Worst Storylines

Lightning Round Challenge™: For some of the longer tenured rasslers on the WWE roster, what is the one angle that you can associate that them with and go “wow, someone was paid money to come up with this?” For a handful of those listed, I’m sure you could think of a dozen per person, but in this case, just the first one that pops to mind. As always, thanks for the years of entertainment and ripping apart those storylines to begin with.

John Cena

The Bray Wyatt feud.  Made no sense, went nowhere, destroyed Bray as a main event guy. 

Kane

Oh god, so many to choose from.  Probably the one where he was fighting the fake version of himself because reasons. 

The Undertaker

Speaking of fighting the fake version of yourself…

Big Show

Undertaker leaves him in the desert as training. 

Randy Orton

Wasn’t the Hogan storyline pretty stupid? 

Triple H

Katie Vick, boom. 

Goldust

TAFKA Goldust in general.  Which then leads to doomsday preacher Dustin Runnells and the return of the original Goldust character.  So bad all around. 

Sting (got to get his name out there for potential Mania 32 rumors!)

Black Scorpion, bitches. 

246 comments:

  1. I don't think caine used it as an excuse..it was the truth..Werdum certainly was punishing him and that played a part but he was gassed as hell

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  2. ThebrazilianpsychoJune 14, 2015 at 8:33 AM

    Both showed terrible cardio in that fight.

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  3. ThebrazilianpsychoJune 14, 2015 at 8:33 AM

    The way he's going, he can actually win. He found his fire again.

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  4. I don't know about that...the first round was a crazy pace for a heavyweight fight.

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  5. I hope so..she needs the momentum leading into her epic match with Steph

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  6. ThebrazilianpsychoJune 14, 2015 at 8:35 AM

    Sunday, time for Bad Religion!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moPY9_wqH-8

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  7. So what are your thoughts there. Dana has said that fight will get 2 million buys yet they aren't as hot now as they were when Brock got them their biggest audience and that was no where near 2 million. Rousey is a huge star but I think the whole cyborg thing has been over blown and no one but the hardcore fans know who she is. It will be huge but I think Dana stuck his foot in his mouth by tossing out a number they are unlikely to make and thus it will be seeing as a disappointment

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  8. He does that a lot though... so it doesn't quite matter.

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  9. Cena vs Orton,one more timeJune 14, 2015 at 8:38 AM

    For Cena, it has to be the Johnny Ace storyline.Who the fuck thought that feud should be main-eventing a PPV ahead of Punk/Bryan?

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  10. ..it's bazarro world Rocky 4 where the russian is rocky

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  11. ThebrazilianpsychoJune 14, 2015 at 8:39 AM

    I just wanna see who's the best, this feud is brewing for years. I wanna see Lady Armbar get the victory.

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  12. I don't remember Big Show in the desert..when was this?

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  13. Cena vs Orton,one more timeJune 14, 2015 at 8:42 AM

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VK5Figz3aIU



    Behold,a classic for the ages.

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  14. ThebrazilianpsychoJune 14, 2015 at 8:44 AM

    He was like a bear playing with food. His fight with Carwin is fun, Shane runs over in the first round, second round starts Brock enters FINALBOSS MODE. It's like he gave him a round to finish him, he couldn't, so bye bye.

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  15. Also TAFKA Goldust was awesome because it gave us one of the strangest moments in TV history:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqLQ6qRV2fY

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  16. I kind of liked the Cena-Bray feud. But Cena doesn't really have a ton of horrible feuds to choose from either.

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  17. Big Show= Eddie Guerrero feud involving SUPER-DIARRHEA or the DX feud where Vince's crimson mask got stuffed up Show's ass.

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  18. His first show on Netflix was AMAZING. He did like 7 minutes on Seal that absolutely killed.


    His most recent one is just kind of average.

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  19. Just because the other kids watched it, that doesn't make it OK.

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  20. Do we have evidence those ppv buys were for Cena vs Ace and not Punk vs Bryan.

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  21. GBH had the ROH match of the year in 2012 in my opinion. So there's that.

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  22. Cena vs Kane which did nothing for either and buried Zach Ryder was a bad one for both, higher on Cena's worst list than Kane's.
    Taker had so many bad ones after he turned face in 92 (Kamala, Gonzalez, Millin Dollar Corperation)
    Katie Vick is the worst for HHH and Kane (Kane has had so many bad feuds)

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  23. If not Cena-Big Johnny, those buys were for AJ.

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  24. Good call on Cena-Kane!

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  25. The Undertaker leaving Big Show in the dessert was a fantastic promo. For Big Show I am going with the entire Big Bossman feud.

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  26. It did?


    Extreme Rules: 263,000
    Over The Limit: 167,000
    No Way Out: 194,000
    MITB: 188,000
    NOC: 189,000
    Hell In A Cell: 199,000
    TLC: 175,000

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  27. No Way Out looks significantly hire than Over the Limit and MitB. So looks like the Cena-Big Johnny storyline did in fact draw. Just using Big Show as an avatar.

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  28. It was top notch dark humor but that was purely unintentional. The fact of the matter was someone actually wrote this angle and pitched it to Vince.

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  29. Not only did the Bossman steal the Big Show's fathers casket....but he did it with the Bluesmobile...thats just impressive all around

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  30. Bossman was on a rare type of heel fire in late 99. This feud was directly after the feeding Al Snow's dog to him feud. I think this might have been intentional. Especially the poem.

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  31. The fact that the match drew the worst buys of the year isn't a great sign

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  32. Big Show v. Bossman is his best feud

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  33. Such a classic promo, "I got more shower time than you got ring time". I precursor to American Badass.

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  34. I think that's because we all saw the turn coming. But if we look over the feud and see that the buys increased during the storyline it shows that the feud did draw. For whatever reason people wanted to see that second part of the feud.

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  35. I prefer when we don't interact.

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  36. Which match was that? I stopped following ROH several years ago

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  37. I was down on TJ for years because that match was so awful

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  38. With the deepest regrets
    and tears that are soaked
    I'm sorry to hear that your dad finally croaked
    He lived his whole life on his own terms
    And now he'll be buried and eaten by worms
    But if I had a son as stupid as you
    I'd wish for cancer so I would die too
    So be brave and get your life back on track
    Cause the old bastards dead and he ain't ever coming back"

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  39. BRAVO. Never has that poem been more appropriate as a response.

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  40. Mitch, The GodfatherJune 14, 2015 at 9:14 AM

    Who could help but find this hilarious?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TfvPUJQXbrI

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  41. Big Show, you're a big nasty bastard and your mamma says so!

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  42. And Kane using that smother claw or whatever the fuck was terrible too.

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  43. Mitch, The GodfatherJune 14, 2015 at 9:22 AM

    With Kane, it's like clockwork every two years.


    2002 - Katie Vick
    2004 - Pregnant Lita
    2006- May 19th/Fake Kane
    2008- Rey Mysterio
    2010- Vegetable Undertaker
    2012- Embrace The Hate
    2014- Daniel Bryan/Brie Bella


    Wonder what we have in store for next year?

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  44. Thanks for posting this, Scott!

    -The guy who sent it to you

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  45. Yea Bossman draggin his old mans casket around is the creme de le creme lol.

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  46. it was post russo too.

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  47. GBH 06 had Bryan vs. KENTA and Nigel vs. Marufuji. Very good show.

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  48. Vegetable Taker was hilarious because Kane was on his "I Will Avenge Him" kick and everybody could clearly tell it was Kane that did it. It was even funnier that he attacked Rey Mysterio for it because in kayfabe, that's silly, and in non-kayfabe Rey's the one who actually injured Taker!

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  49. alot ppl psyched for that match streamed it. Scott didnt even buy it as it took him like 7 months to review it.

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  50. 2000 was Jericho spilling coffee over him too

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  51. I don't think the Cena feud hurt Bray. Having nothing interesting to do for the six months immediately thereafter hurt Bray.

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  52. One win and by demon child, man.

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  53. Joey Jo-Jo Junior ShabbadooJune 14, 2015 at 9:45 AM

    I know that few will agree (because it had the unintended result of elevating Daniel Bryan from NXT rookie to upper midcard mainstay) but I thought the Nexus angle was pretty bad and ultimately pointless. The initial beatdown? Great riveting stuff. Pretty much everything else? Bleh. The obvious lowlights were Sheamus scurrying away from the group like Scooby Doo backstage, the rookies legitimately injuring Ricky Steamboat, the Summerslam finish, Cena's "firing" consisting of him showing up on TV every week, and of course Bryan being legitimately fired for "too much violence" on a professional wrestling show (although it worked out for him in the end). Just felt like a gigantic waste of time and an excuse to sell some t-shirts, and they're STILL trying make something out of Barrett.

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  54. Orton/Hogan was fine until The Hulkster felt like he was giving too much to this young buck and the Hulkamaniacs weren't gonna like that, brother.

    Sad thing is that the Bray Wyatt/John Cena feud started fine, too. Then they couldn't decide whether it was about John's legacy, bringing the monster out of Cena, stopping Bray Wyatt from corrupting the youth of the world or a straight up athletic competition.

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  55. SMELL THE GLOVE

    SMELL IT

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  56. I have no fucking clue what they were going for with that either. I honestly think they were just trying to troll the crowd and that didnt even work.

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  57. And that tag scramble match was so awful too.

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  58. John Cena

    So many worse than Wyatt. How about Great Khali stealing the belt? Or the horrid Tensai/Johnny Ace/Big Show storyline. Actually, pick ANY of the 500 times he feuded with Show.

    Kane

    Katie VIck

    The Undertaker

    Underfaker fo' sho'

    Big Show

    Back when it happened I'd say the Big Bossman storyline, because it comepletely killed Show's first title run. But in hindsight, it's one of the best things he ever did. So I'm going with his Smackdown run in 2005 where he feuded with JBL, they had a bardbed-wire steel cage match and nobody cared.

    Randy Orton

    "Wasn’t the Hogan storyline pretty stupid?" No, they just put the wrong guy over. Orton's worst feud was "Eddie's in Hell" by a country mile.

    Triple H

    Katie Vick. But I really loathed PG-DX and the never ended McMahon feud.

    Goldust



    I agree with Scott, '98 nearly killed his career.



    Sting


    At least Black Scorpion has B-Movie charm, that Vampiro feud in 2000 is pretty bad, or the feud with Luger in late '99. Nobody was even trying at that point.

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  59. Bray has never had any thing to do. It's retarded. Why isn't he in the title picture, has he ever been? I don't get it.

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  60. He was Bob Sacramano when I met him. I didn't know he was Art until someone said it in a thread.

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  61. It's Burt Macklin now

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  62. Besides the excellent first night, I agree that the Nexus was a total flop. They really blundered one of the most talked about debuts ever.

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  63. "Play time's over, sit down and shut up. Later on tonight, there's gonna be a match for the tag team titles between the Acolytes and X-Pac & Kane, whatever whatever, it's not important. The fact of the matter is, this Sunday at Summerslam the winner of that match will come face to face with this. And to make sure that my man was right, this week I put him to the test. I had Paul Bearer call out to California - San Fernando Valley to some associates of ours at the Local 81 - Paul said we're gonna need two bikes for a ride in the desert. The guy said 'Brother Paul, now we know that the Dead Man can handle it, but I don't know about the Big Show. It's August, it's 120 degrees in the middle of Death Valley.' He says 'the only things that survive in the desert are the cold-blooded...the snakes and the lizards.' Paul said 'that's all right, and in one of those bikes that you're setting up for us, I want you the Big Show to only have enough gas to get to the middle of the desert and not get back.' So we're on our way - we get to the middle of Death Valley - 120 degrees, the Big Show's bike runs out of gas. And I pull up next to him and I ask him this question: 'It's 120 degrees, how are you gonna survive?' He looks me straight in the eyes, without hesitation, he says 'I'm gonna wait 'til you go to sleep, I'm gonna stab you in the back, I'm gonna cut your flesh off, make a coat out of it, and I'm gonna eat YOUR flesh until I find food.' I said 'Good answer big man, but I don't sleep,' and I drove off and left him. I waited on the outskirts of the desert. Two days later, he walks out with a snake necktie and lizard boots, carryin' his Harley-Davidson on his shoulder. The point of the story is this. What used to be known as SummerSlam will now be known as Armageddon, and whoever shows up...will be hurt."

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  64. It was a great idea that slowly imploded because the concept of rookies showing they're dangerous was undermined by the reality of rookies not knowing how to work competently or have crowd reactions yet.

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  65. Goldusts worst feud was the beginning of the Val Venis feud. It was really uncomfortable and they made Val the face but no one wanted to cheer him.

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  66. Goddamn, that was awkward.


    "See that guy openly weeping in the ring over his wife cheating on him with a porn star? LET'S CHEER THE PORN STAR!!!"

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  67. Lol! Russo at his worst!

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  68. I think Big Show would gladly be left in a dessert.

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  69. John Cena - The Wyatt feud is easily the worst he's had in a while as far as payoff, but I'll go with the whole Kane/Zack Ryder situation.
    Kane - Katie Vick or May 19th... I'll go with the corpse fucking.
    Undertaker - Can I say his entire American Badass run? If not, Fake Taker.
    Big Show - Crying Doofus Big Show vs. Authority
    Randy Orton - The Eddie stuff.
    Triple H - I guess Katie Vick is a 2x Winner.
    Goldust - Turrets Goldust, but TAFKA Goldust is a good second choice
    Sting - Black Scorpion. Robocop was a tough contender, too.

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  70. Probably the most tone-deaf thing Russo ever did. Which is really saying something.

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  71. But it led to Cena vs Captain Charisma in possibly the greatest non-feud of all time.

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  72. Joey Jo-Jo Junior ShabbadooJune 14, 2015 at 10:09 AM

    Granted, but there were also flaws in the execution. Why did these "outsiders" have a video tron and theme music one week in? Who authorized that? And while I understand the "let's not look like WCW" logic of having the WWE locker room run them out of the arena, it still made Nexus look like clowns way too soon. Build up the threat first, THEN rally the troops. In their quest not to repeat the mistakes of the nWo, WWE undercut their own heel stable.

    Oh, and how could I forget: the Nexus angle also spawned the Anonymous General Manager, which in turn lead to heel Michael Cole. Just terrible.

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  73. I quite liked TFKA Goldust's Fucked rendition of his theme.

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  74. My memory is hazy, did they do a double turn? I'm sure Goldust returned as a face.

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  75. I'm a heel Michael Cole apologist so I'll leave that debate alone.


    I thought they just used the Nexus theme and credits roll for their Titantron? That makes way more sense than they had one custom built.

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  76. He did. Before the turn, it was kind of 50/50, but Goldust was definitely the face for their match at Judgment Day.

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  77. Nope. Val was still intended to be the face. The crowd was cheering for Goldust but the intended face in the storyline was still Val.

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  78. You know what would have made the Goldust-Venis feud work so much better? If they'd had Dustin react like a stereotypical villain where he's angrily shaking his fist like a cartoon villain that has been thwarted. Him having a fucking nervous breakdown in the ring when he sees Val in bed with his wife was awful. I can't believe they kept Val the face and wrote Dustin to respond like that and figured the crowd would still be on Val's side.

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  79. I wasn't watching for vegetable Taker, could someone please summarise what happened?

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  80. Stranger In The AlpsJune 14, 2015 at 10:14 AM

    Pretty sure that Sting's feud with Vampiro was dumber than The Black Scorpion. Buckets of blood raining down from the arena ceiling.........a stunt man posing as Sting being set on fire and falling from the WCW version of the Titantron. Didn't this also lead into the KISS Demon vs. Vampiro feud? Jay-sus 2000 WCW was horrible.

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  81. I quite liked TAFKA Goldust in general. Luna was perfect with him.

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  82. Cena and Kane also had the unintended consequence of giving a prominent role to Eve Torres and her horrendous acting.

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  83. Rey injured Taker on a house show. Kane shows up on Smackdown one week screaming that somebody had hurt Taker and put him into a coma and that Kane would find him and KILL THE OFFENDING PERSON for hurting his family.


    Kane was so over-the-top in these promos that it was obvious even to small children that Kane himself was the one who attacked Taker and put him into a coma.


    Anyways Detective Kane decides REY MYSTERIO ambushed Undertaker at his home and beat him into a coma. Rey is understandably confused abotu this conclusion. Kane wins MitB, cashes in on the same show and beats Rey for the World Title. They feud for a month with Kane winning and retaining the title.


    Taker comes back a month later and was like "Dammit, Kane. We all know you did this!" They feud for three months with Kane winning everytime and Taker leaving to begin his only at WM schedule.


    Oddly enough, Kane got into CRAZY shape for this feud and had probably the best matches he's had post-2004. The storyline was ludicrous, however.

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  84. Crying Big Show worried about his IRONCLAD contract takes the cake for him far more than Undertaker threatening to tie him to the learnin' tree.

    PS Big Show ate the cake.

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  85. RoH seems like a tough show to stomach in 2003.

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  86. Detective Kane, lol. I guess it was about time that he came out on top when feuding with Taker. I might Network that shit if I'm ever drinking particularly heavily.

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  87. Cena's stupidest feud was with Carlito's bodyguard Jesus where he no-sold being stabbed in the kidney in a nightclub.

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  88. Lol I forgot about Jesus!!! Blink and you miss him.

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  89. The funny part was that everybody on the show just assumed Kane did it too if I remember right. I think we got some "skeptical Teddy Long" on Smackdown.

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  90. WWE fired him while he was recovering from spinal fusion surgery.

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  91. Joey Jo-Jo Junior ShabbadooJune 14, 2015 at 10:22 AM

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=txJYNeSQht4

    So I was wrong, it wasn't the first week after. In fact, the first segment here was fine. But it came apart fast.

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  92. That's really awful. I mean he wasn't any good but you could probably go another way about it.

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  93. I think it works if its the current crop of NXT guys. Part of the problem was that all the guys from that were in developmental for a reason. The only ones who really panned out were Bryan and The Ryback and maybe Barrett.

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  94. I really like the American Bad Ass run especially once he turned heel. He was just a much more realistic version of himself, and I could appreciate that.


    TAFKA was just great fun and fir the wild late 90's WWE so well.

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  95. They were full of class in that period. It was right after Johnny Ace took over talent relations. They also fired Dawn Marie while she was pregnant.

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  96. This is never not great.

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  97. Don't forget Hayes ratted him out to Vince for getting his neck worked on by the event staff. Apparently you're a pussy if you're a lower card guy getting medical attention . Vince then killed his push

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  98. He was badly banged up going into the match and shouldn't have worked, considering the surgery he needed. If anything, Vince deserves slack for sending someone in the ring in his condition rather than killing a push that nobody liked in the first place.

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  99. Oh hey and that began a seven to eight year period where they couldn't create their own stars. Seriously, after the OVW Class all become main eventers their new talent was shit.

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  100. His whole "this is my yard" and burying talent was a complete turn off, especially in 2002 when someone had the bright idea to book him in 20+ minute matches every PPV and he would stink up the place (Austin at Backlash, Hogan at J-Day, Hunter at KOTR. Triology of Suck).

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  101. Big Show choke slamming Kurt Angle off a balcony complete with a bloody Kurt Angle at the bottom has to be in there somewhere.

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  102. As ever with the subject of ridiculously bad storylines, I mourn the fact that the original plan for Heidenreich never came to fruition.

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  103. Wasn't Kurt Angle the daddy?

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  104. Was this before or after they tried creating a love interest for him with Joy Giovanni?

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  105. Big Show:

    http://i.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/article/1/7/6/399176_v1.gif

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  106. What about Austin's worst when he was on top? I can't really think of one.

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  107. Two word review; Shit Sandwich. Wait, you can't say that? Can you?

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  108. Right before. I think Joy was in the winter of 04

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  109. Dropping HHH FROM A CRANE to murder him?

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  110. I certainly can't argue that, those matches were awful show killing main events.

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  111. ThebrazilianpsychoJune 14, 2015 at 10:31 AM

    Which was?

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  112. Undertaker feud leading to Rock Bottom, complete with attempted embalmment and the disaster that was the match itself.

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  113. Oh god I'd erased it from my memory

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  114. The best part of that is that by the time they had their blowoff match both guys had turned and Show was the face in the feud. It also gave us one of the funniest spots ever when Angle & his henchmen shot Show with a TRANQUILISER DART so they could shave his head.

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  115. Unfrozen Nazi super-soldier.

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  116. Managed by Paul Heyman.

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  117. WWE needed to follow that up with a Crocodile Hunter-style narrative by Angle.

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  118. I'm surprised people had such a hard on for Wade Barrett. Dude is midcard for life, a "good hand" if you will.

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  119. ThebrazilianpsychoJune 14, 2015 at 10:33 AM

    IRONY!

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  120. It's subtle bit of ridiculous to give the Unfrozen Nazi a Jewish Agent.

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  121. Hey, it works well enough with Brock Lesnar nowadays.

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  122. This is what happened the minute Chris Kreski left and Steph took over.

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  123. It wasn't good, but he wasn't any less over until he had nothing to do after it.

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  124. Leader of the Fourth Reich.

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  125. The JBL title run killed Smackdown for me, I still haven't really watched it regularly since.

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  126. THAT'S ART?

    Wow. I ain't in the loop

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  127. I just saw that kid in a new commercial.

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  128. I survived JBL, but the switch to Friday's was the nail in the coffin. I tried keeping up with it for a few months, but it wasn't a desirable night to worry about watching rasslin'.

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  129. JBL's as champ is one of those things that's aged amazingly well. It's way more entertaining now to watch him keep barely escaping than it was at the time.

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  130. Punk said, at a Q&A before a show in Coventry, that a guy he knew in the WWE at the time said Heidenreich was supposed to have been frozen before the Nazis did anything so he wouldn't understand why people would hate him.

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  131. That...might be the best thing that never happened. I spit out my drink reading that.

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  132. Lol unfrozen Nazi face.

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  133. Elgin VS Steen for the ROH title.

    2012-2013 was Elgin's best run by far, so naturally he didn't get the title until June 2014 and since he lost it to Briscoe he's been ice cold--but that match with Steen was *****. 2012 was amazing for Elgin, got ***** out of Meltzer for his match with Davey that year too.

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  134. I recall Kane defeated Undertaker in 1998 to earn the title shot at KotR, and then I literally don't think he ever beat Taker again until that 2010 feud. So that feud was important since it brought Kane's all-time record against Undertaker to roughly 4-307.

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  135. The thought of Kane as a hard boiled detective interrogating jobbers is making me laugh.

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  136. Then HHH shows up a week later on Raw with a bandage on his ribs.

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  137. Didn't Kane only win that match because of interference from a returning Mankind which led to their HIAC?

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  138. A lot of people streaming the ppv wanting Punk Bryan doesn't prove those who bought it give a fuck about Johnny Ace. If we're using anacdotal evidence and pretending it means anything--a lot of people bought that ppv to send a messege they wanted more Bryan.

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  139. No, not worse than the Scorpion doing magic tricks and turning audience members into leopards.

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  140. I had no idea these were the same people.

    I figured they just stopped posting at some point.

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  141. JR did his damnedest to try to justify it, by pointing out Dustin dumping Marlena on national TV, but that was practically ancient history by Attitude Era standards.

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  142. It was essentially three weeks of Kane randomly screaming "DID YOU DO IT" at random people. Way more entertaining than it got credit for.

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  143. Wikpedia puts it better than I could...

    "A suicidal Hawk climbed to the top of the TitanTron, the giant television monitor erected during episodes of WWF's Monday Night Raw
    to show match highlights to fans in attendance. Puke, supposedly
    attempting to rescue Hawk, climbed after him, only to apparently throw
    Hawk over the side (with a special effect being used to make it appear
    as though fans could see Hegstrand's body plunging a fatal distance
    behind the screen); Puke then revealed that he had been enabling Hawk's
    drug addiction in order to kill him and take his place in the Legion of
    Doom".

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  144. This was WAY before people gave a shit about Bryan for any reason other than AJ.


    There was the upswing after WM28 but it didn't really start picking up until the Dr Shelby skits.

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  145. ME ALL ALONG

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  146. Even the WWE takes the piss out of that storyline these days - its features in Jerry's show in the Network.

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  147. The Higher Power....

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  148. RIP CK. Dragged RAW to astounding levels of quality. Became proper unmissable fare.

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  149. What's wrong with TAFKA Goldust? that was awesome. Preacher Dustin was even better. The problem is they didn't develop a story around the characters.

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  150. I had to google the name in order to get the joke. Apparently, they are all Seinfeld one-off characters. People familiar with the show were in on the joke, I guess.

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  151. Watching that clip now is so funny. I literally cannot believe someone OKed that.

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  152. I can tell you because I was there but the strong rumor at the time was that 3PW called the inspector as it was during the "Philly Wars" of 2002-2003. The drawback to that was that ROH had the ring crew pay for GA tickets so they could say in the building to work and not lose any money by leaving some fans out.

    I don't think at the time anyone knew this was going to be the last show at the Murphy Rec. But it was a packed building and lead to moving to the National Guard Armory in December.

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  153. Really? I hated that whole run. It was one of the reasons I stopped watching.

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  154. I agree. I liked the idea of both of those things.

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  155. KOTR match is one of the worst I'd ever seen. 30 mins of blatantly fake punches, done slowly - and a fucking rollup finish.

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  156. I think you forgot the unmasking storyline, complete with JR on fire and Shane McMahon getting his balls shocked!


    Kane really needs to have his own wing in Wrestlecrap.

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  157. There's a lot to be said for who the stars were when you very first started watching this dumb sport. Those lucky kids in the Southeast got Ric and Dusty, Minnesota kids got Verne and Nick, New York kids got the Hulk, Memphis had the King. I was a lucky kid as well, having Harley Leland Race.


    They all conditioned the youngsters to believe that what they were watching was wrestling, and they connected. The author identified with Dusty's Sisyphean task in taking down the Minnesotan contingent of Ric Flair and the Andersons. It fit perfectly. Like many have said - it isn't the matches.

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  158. Joey Jo-Jo Junior ShabbadooJune 14, 2015 at 11:09 AM

    This is becoming worrisome...

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  159. Sting's lowpoint for me was when Vampiro lit him on fire and tossed him from the NitroTron or whatever that thing was called.

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  160. In that Undertaker-Big Show desert promo (which was pre-BikerTaker, by the way), Taker namechecked "Local 81" -- i.e. The Hells Angels. I know Taker is a biker in real life, but I always wondered if he ever had affiliation with the Hells Angels.



    People don't tend to toss around stories of running with the Hells Angels lightly. Even if you're a 6'10" satanic leader of the Ministry of Darkness.

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  161. Joey Jo-Jo Junior ShabbadooJune 14, 2015 at 11:14 AM

    A sympathetic Nazi? Wow.

    "Why do they boo me? Don't they know all the wonderful things Der Führer has done for the Fatherland?!? Clearly the youth are not concentrating enough on my words! Perhaps there is some sort of camp to help with this?"

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  162. Quote Unquote SirJune 14, 2015 at 11:15 AM

    I loved it too. Nicely written, fun and insightful.

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  163. I love how fighting your evil doppelgänger is the answer for TWO different guys. Ah, wrestling :)

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  164. ...I've never seen this promo.

    I have to rectify this

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  165. Joey Jo-Jo Junior ShabbadooJune 14, 2015 at 11:20 AM

    They missed the boat with Darren Young in that regard. He could have been Bizarro World Reverse Image Cena.

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  166. Barrett promised us a "higher purpose" LITTERALY dozens of times.

    No higher purpose was ever ducking revealed.

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  167. TheOriginalDonaldJune 14, 2015 at 11:21 AM

    John Cena is Rachel Dolezal's younger brother?

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  168. Money was most definitely left on the table.

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  169. Poor Bray. Poor, poor Bray.

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  170. Droz didn't exactly "leave" the company.

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  171. Joey Jo-Jo Junior ShabbadooJune 14, 2015 at 11:24 AM

    Makes sense.

    Or Young and Cena as biracial twins who adopted the other's culture.

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  172. It's a full enjoy!

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  173. Joey Jo-Jo Junior ShabbadooJune 14, 2015 at 11:30 AM

    If nothing else, he should have eventually been revealed to be Juan Cena.

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  174. "This is the Ministry of *Boredom*!" Chris Jericho, 2 minutes after

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  175. Yeah, true. "Only Dana White wins boxing matches these days" and the like were extremely popular tweets after that fight.

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  176. Nicely done! I couldn't have expressed my sentiment any better.

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  177. TheOriginalDonaldJune 14, 2015 at 11:39 AM

    With Steve Martin as Navin Johnson

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  178. I just watched all the black scorpion stuff from 1990 the other day actually.

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  179. We need a live thread by four for Wrestlemania 2000 live watch mods!!!!

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  180. Adam "Colorado" CurryJune 14, 2015 at 11:53 AM

    Fuck you.

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  181. Reason #54939385 I don't like Taker.

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  182. Vince sure liked to use that position to take the flak.

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  183. IMO Kane & HHH are in the unique position of having the same answer to this question with the Katie Vick story line. One of the few times I turned off wrestling for a while because I disliked what was on (rather than being too busy or w/e)

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  184. If we had to have that Bikertaker garbage, there should have been a feud with a Japanese wrestler riding a more reliable Japanese bike.

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  185. I sent in a support ticket to the super secret platinum level elite BoD posters group to get this taken care of for you.

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  186. I dunno about the Wyatt feud. It had enough strong moments to be entertaining to watch, and I think Bray can definitely be salvaged. The Kane/Cena "hate people"/"lolnope" feud was a lot harder to sit through, produced worse matches, and killed Ryder dead.

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  187. 165 comments and nobody's mentioned either the "he's a pedophile / no wait he's just shooting" WCW storyline or the Black Reign "he carries around a rat, has a rat on a pole match, and teams up with RELLIK (that's Killer backwards!) storylines for Goldust?



    The TNA run in particular was absolute rock bottom for him, I'm still amazed he managed to recover from it.

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  188. Stranger In The AlpsJune 14, 2015 at 12:05 PM

    Who doesn't enjoy magic??

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  189. I can't believe we've gone this far with nobody mentioning Randy Orton JUMPING OUT OF A STRIPPER CAKE to surprise HHH.

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  190. Correction: that poem is always an appropriate response to anything.

    "What's the ETA on this deliverable?"
    "With the deepest regrets..."

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  191. I vaguely remember Madusa and Bull Nakano having a similar feud in WCW

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