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Matt's Monday Night RAW Review - 6/8/2015

Well, all right...after my hernia surgery, I am surprisingly good enough to finally sit at a laptop and write. I don't think I've used a computer at all except for just now. Everything's been on my phone.

In any case, hope you're all well.

We have a Going Home Show coming tonight and there have been rumors ranging from a Reigns heel turn to Lesnar showing up at Money in the Bank to have some sort of impact on the big ladder match.

Let's roll...


We are LIVE(!!!) from New Orleans, Louisiana for WWE Monday Night RAW!!!

Michael Cole, JBL and Byron Saxton are the guys at the desk.

John Cena starts us off which is a welcome change which, I suppose, might be the lesser of two evils. He basically gives a mini version of what he said last week, pandering and yelling at the top of his lungs about how he's gonna prove himself because he's "the face blah blah blah". This brings out Kevin Owens who the announcers kinda shit on. Owens says that the fans are tired of Cena and his Open Challenge. Instead, they should have an NXT Title Open Challenge. (DANIELLE: Isn't challenging for, and possibly winning, the NXT Title a step backwards for a WWE superstar? I'm just saying. It's like watching a Major League Baseball team challenging their minor league affiliate for a division title. It's hard to be excited for the result.)

John Cena condescends and then says he accepts Owens' challenge. Owens says that Cena's delusional. They won't fight tonight. Cena says that it's kinda weak that Owens won't accept just anyone's challenge. He rants and raves about the situation. Owens: "Ok...so, we're just gonna ignore all of that...and let's let the person coming from the back decide which title he wants." We wait for that Superstar and it's...

Neville. Neville has the mic and tells Cena that they'll fight again someday. Neville says that Owens likes to mock the fans and the other Superstars. He can't let that stand. So, he chooses to take on Owens.

Cena is gonna join the guys on commentary for the love of god...

MATCH #1: Kevin Owens (champion) vs. Neville (challenger) for the NXT Championship
The fight immediately starts outside the ring. Neville chases back in, then hits a nice Hurricarana, tossing Owens outside. Neville dives outside, knocking Owens down. Neville rolls him back in the ring and pins for a one count. Owens goes on the attack, hitting a short-arm clothesline. Neville fights back but Owens shoves Neville in the corner and hits a splash as well as a Cannonball Splash. Two count. Owens flips Neville up and drops his stomach on the top rope. Owens hits a headlock as John Cena won't shut up about himself and even compares himself to Babe Ruth. Neville punches away at Owens but Owens catches him and drops Neville's stomach right on his knee. Two count. Owens chokes Neville against the bottom rope, then hits a Side Suplex for two. When we come back from breaks, Owens has Neville on his shoulders but Neville counters with a nice DDT. Owens rolls out of the ring. Neville dives at him and the fight continues. Neville rolls him back inside the ring. A couple of counters and Neville hits a Springboard Missile Dropkick. Neville tries to hit a high kick but Owens counters with a Pump Handle Slam and a near fall. Neville comes back, kicking Owens in the face on a whip, then hits a German Suplex for two. Neville goes for the Red Arrow but Owens gets to his feet. Neville knocks him down with an Enzuguri and tries the Arrow again. He misses. Neville lands on his feet, then hits a Superkick. Another Red Arrow attempt fails as Owens gets up, knocks him off the top buckle, then hits the Pop-Up Powerbomb to retain at 13:53.
WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION: Kevin Owens via Pop-Up Powerbomb
RATING: **3/4. Not a bad match. Was slow to start, then picked up. Neville didn't get a whole lot of offense and this match could have been light years better if they had worked to their potential.

Post-match, Owens invites Cena into the ring. Cena obliges but Owens leaves the ring, bragging about how he's NXT Champion.

Cole, JBL and Byron all talk about the situation with Ambrose and Rollins. We get a long segment detailing Elimination Chamber.

AT MONEY IN THE BANK: Ambrose vs. Rollins for the WWE Title.

Ambrose has been walking around New Orleans with the title.

Triple H and Steph are backstage. Rollins interrupts and he's so disgusted by Dean Ambrose! Just DISGUSTED! ACTING!!! They mock Rollins about not needing help from The Authority. Steph tells Rollins to deal with this shit and they tell Rollins to pick an opponent to face to prove that he can handle himself.

We review the idiotic "Twin Magic" spot the Bellas pulled last week. On Smackdown, Paige ridicules the Bellas for "always using that trick".

Renee Young brings in Nikki Bella. Nikki says that Paige is projecting her frustration. She thinks that Paige is, like, so ny-eve! Like OMG! Nikki says that this IS Paige's house...but she lives in the Bellas' world.

Next, Summer Rae vs. Nikki Bella.

MATCH #2: Summer Rae vs. WWE Divas Champion Nikki Bella (non-title)
Nikki stiffly slams Summer, then does push-ups because that's what she always does during matches. Summer comes back with a forearm and a Cobra Clutch. Nikki breaks because that shit only works if you're Ted DiBiase. She somehow knocks Nikki down and gets a two count. Summer chokes Nikki against the buckle. Nikki comes back and hits the Rack Attack to get the win at 2:18.
WINNER: Nikki via Rack Attack.
RATING: DUD. (Danielle: Oh, come on. Nikki's entrance music was longer than that match.)

Cole can't even be bothered to recap any of that. Instead, we take a look at Roman Reigns running the Gauntlet last week.

More Instagram photos of Dean Ambrose just hanging out in various spots in New Orleans.

Roman Reigns is out here to talk. He says that he hated the MITB case and the contract because it was tied to a guy he detests. He says he's gonna make history when he climbs the ladder and gets the contract. Aaaaaand here comes Kane to dead silence. Kane says that he believes that anyone else stands a better chance than Roman. He says that Reigns is full of weakness, not strength. Reigns just invites Kane into the ring and he'll show people how to break a jaw. That brings out Dolph Ziggler. Ziggler says that Kane can't do a thing unless The Authority pulls his string. He says that Kane is a human hardware store because he throws "wrenches" into peoples' plans and "hammers" things out and "screws" people and he's a "tool" because he "tools away". Oh, jesus, please cut away to anything. He says he has a hot Russian chick and he'll win the MITB case. Kane goes with the "tool" thing. He says that Ziggler and Reigns better watch their mouths because the MITB foes will be in singles action tonight.

That brings out R-Truth as this segment just takes a turn. Kane: "What are you doing out here? You're not even IN the match!" Truth: "I'm not? You sure? This one's on me. My bad." Oh...fuck. Wow. Truth leaves. 

Then The New Day shows up. They insult Kane. Kofi says that when he wins MITB, all of The New Day will be the winners of that case. Kane interrupts their chant again -- only to bring out Sheamus. Sheamus says that the thought of winning the MITB case brings a smile to his face. More ranting. Kane interrupts again and says that everyone's forgetting about Neville and Randy Orton.

Orton's music hits. (DANIELLE: So...we had to sit through all that, plus R-Truth, just so Kane could introduce Randy Orton?)

When we come back, it's Orton and Sheamus... 

MATCH #3: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton
The match starts outside but continues inside with Randy Orton hitting a back breaker and Garvin Stomp. Sheamus rolls outside to recover but Orton attacks with a clothesline, then rolls Sheamus back inside. Sheamus attacks with shots in the corner but Orton hits uppercuts and a headbutt. Sheamus hits quick uppercuts. Orton fights back and knocks Sheamus down. Sheamus rolls out of the ring again. Orton goes outside and shoves him back in. Orton whips him into the corner but Sheamus elbows him on a charge, then hits a short-arm clothesline for two. Sheamus puts on an armbar but Orton breaks it and hits a dropkick. Sheamus comes back with some shots, then puts Orton outside. When we come back from break, Orton breaks a headlock only to see Sheamus powerslam him for two. Orton fights back as the two men trade punches. Sheamus knees Orton in the gut and whips him to the ropes. Orton comes back with a knee to the gut and clothesline along with a Powerslam in Stride. Sheamus regains momentum only to fly into the corner post. Orton hits a leghook suplex and goes for the Vintage Orton DDT. RKO attempt by Orton goes awry. Sheamus tries a Brogue but misses and Orton clotheslines him outside. It's a brawl as Sheamus tries to toss Orton into the table. Orton manages to fly over it and lands on his feet. Sheamus grabs a chair but Orton punches Sheamus, then hits Sheamus in the stomach with the chair for the DQ at 13:09.
WINNER: Sheamus via DQ
RATING: **. This was the same match we saw last week. Still, these guys put on a great brawl.

Post-match, Orton's in a bad mood and decides to beat the holy hell out of Sheamus, putting him into the steel steps. He rolls Sheamus into the ring and hits the RKO.

Rollins is on Instagram, looking at more of Dean's pics. J&J come by and say they know that Rollins said some things he didn't mean. Rollins says he meant every single word. He calls them morons. Noble's had it. He says that they've had Rollins' back for a long time and that he wouldn't continue to be champ if it wasn't for them. Rollins says that he's gonna prove how awful they are -- because he wants to take them on in tonight's main event. He laughs at Noble, then slaps him in the face. Noble slaps him back. Rollins lunges but Mercury gets in his way and says that they've defended Rollins -- but, tonight, they're gonna kick his ass.

MATCH #4: Dolph Ziggler vs. Kane
Whoa, we haven't seen this match before. I can hardly wait. Ziggler hits a dropkick, sending Kane into the corner. Ziggler goes for a splash but Kane belts him in the face. Lana, meanwhile, stands halfway down the aisle as Kane hits uppercuts. Long headlock spot with Ziggler finally hitting a chinbreaker to escape. Kane grabs him, however, and it's a Side Suplex for two. Kane punches Ziggler in the corner and then hits a hard knee to Ziggler's head. Kane hits a scoop slam for a one-count. Ziggler comes back, kicking Kane in the head but Kane picks him up and hits a Sidewalk Slam for two. When we come back from a commercial, Ziggler hits the Fame-Asser and gets a near fall. Ziggler tries the Superkick but Kane catches his foot and goes for the Chokeslam. Ziggler counters and does hit the Superkick. Both men go down...and here comes Rusev on crutches because, oh yeah, Lana's still out there on the ramp in case you care. Lana takes a weird fall off the ramp and does something to her ankle. Kane grabs Ziggler on the distraction and hits a Chokeslam to end this bullshit at 9:46.
WINNER: Kane via Chokeslam
RATING: 1/2 a *. A match that served no purpose and that ended because Ziggler was concerned about his new g/f with whom he has no chemistry whatsoever. 

Post-match, trainers and Ziggler tend to Lana as Cole acts like Lana took a dive off the Titantron.
Meanwhile, Ambrose is still on Bourbon Street, touring New Orleans.

J&J are talking backstage. Noble and Mercury agree that Rollins is getting cocky.

NEXT: MizTV starring Ryback and Big Show.

A bunch of people resembling models and bodybuilders are the Top 40 Tough Enough finalists.
Backstage, trainers tend to Lana backstage.

Miz is in the ring, dressed like a Muslim woman and welcomes everyone to MizTV. He recaps last week when Big Show clocked him and robbed him of an IC Title shot. Ryback hits the ring and says that HE was robbed of a chance to beat up Miz. Miz does his "how dare you" spot. Ryback interrupts him and says that he thinks he's big but Damien Sandow outclassed him the entire time they were together. Ryback says that, had they wrestled, Ryback would have taken years off Miz's career. Miz calls him "ugly" and says there's only one pretty face and it's Miz. They argue over crowd chants until Big Show shows up. The crowd chants that the chair Show's sitting in is gonna break. Show tells them that the chair won't break. He talks up his own strength and says he can break whatever he wants and can take whatever he wants. Ryback says that he has no issue with fighting Show. He's not afraid of him...unlike Miz. Ryback stands and so does Show. Miz tries to get them to fight. Show tells him to shut up or else he'll shut Miz's mouth. Miz attacks Show. Show nails him, then tosses Ryback into his chair. He clotheslines Miz out of the ring. Ryback comes to and hits Shell Shock on Show to end the segment. Crowd liked that.

MATCH #5: Los Matadores (Diego & Fernando) (w/ El Torito) vs. Luke Harper & Erick Rowan
The announcers talk about Rowan and Harper as if they're the most awesome tag team in the entire universe even though we've seen them twice on RAW in the last month or so. Harper and Rowan beat up on one of the matadors. Harper hits a huge boot to the face and it's Rowan's turn. Rowan hits a Warrior Splash for two. Torito gets up on the mat to cheer his team but Rowan knocks him off. Diego goes to take care of Torito as Harper and Rowan hit 3D to win it at 2:18.
WINNERS: Harper & Rowan
RATING: n/a - squash

Crowd chants "3D" as Harper grabs a mic and says that the time for everyone to pay for their sins is coming. Rowan says it's ok to be afraid. Everyone should be.

Backstage, Kane laughs at Ambrose's Instagram and mocks Rollins. Rollins isn't happy. Kane says that Rollins is in a no-win situation. If Rollins wins on Sunday, Kane's gonna come down the aisle with the MITB case. Rollins says he's gonna teach J&J a lesson -- then Ambrose -- then Kane. Kane says that he's interested to see if that will happen...because he's gonna be in J&J's corner tonight.

WWE congratulates itself for having more followers than ESPN, HBO -- and GATORADE!!! SUCK IT, HYDRATION!!!

Ambrose is on his way to the arena. He has a ticket to tonight's show.

Cole plugs "Ted 2" and we get a fucking trailer.

MATCH #6: Big E (w/ Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods) vs. Titus O'Neil (w/ Darren Young)
Holy shit, this crowd is asleep. E puts Titus to the mat, then punches at him. He kicks Titus, then claps in his face. More punching and an Abdominal Stretch. Another kick to Titus's ribs and more clapping. Titus finally fights back, then punches at E in the corner. He slaps E's chest, then just throws E across the ring and hits shoulderblocks. Titus puts E in the corner and more punches. Titus hits a huge shoulderblock. Woods starts shoving Young outside. Titus grabs Woods by his hair. Kofi hits the mat. E grabs Titus and hits the Big Ending on the distraction to end it at 3:10.
WINNER: Big E via Big Ending
RATING: 1/4 of a *. Not even a match and makes the challengers look horrible heading into MITB.

The New Day celebrates as Roman Reigns' music hits. He heads to the ring. He takes on Kofi after break. 

MATCH #7: Kofi Kingston (w/ Big E & Xavier Woods) vs. Roman Reigns
Kofi hits a headlock. Reigns escapes and hits a shoulder tackle. More hot headlock action but Reigns escapes again and flips Kofi to the mat and outside. Kofi, Woods and E huddle. They surround the ring and Reigns just stands there and falls for it like a giant dope. Kofi attacks and puts Reigns in the corner, hitting shoulder rams while Woods rants. Kofi runs at Reigns who grabs him for a Samoan Drop. Kofi kicks out but Reigns hits a HUGE clothesline and then sends Kofi out of the ring. Reigns follows him and tosses Kofi's head into the announce table. Reigns hits the Sitting Dropkick and gets back into the ring. He goes for a Suicide Dive at the entire New Day but they move out of the way. Reigns runs at them from another angle and ends up nailing Woods. Kofi hits a missile dropkick from inside the ring. When we come back, Kofi hits a dropkick to Reigns, then kicks him in the back, getting two. Reigns escapes a headlock but Kofi trips Reigns, knocking him to the mat. Kofi goes top rope with a nice Double Axehandle for two. Reigns gets to his feet and hits clotheslines, then puts Kofi in a corner. He rushes and splashes Kofi. Reigns hits a Gut Wrench Slam for two. Kofi kicks at Reigns and tries the SOS but Reigns counters with a Sitting Powerbomb for two. Reigns goes for a Superman Punch. E interferes but Reigns sends him off the mat. Woods attacks but backs off. Kofi tries a roll-up with a handful of tights but Reigns kicks out. Kofi goes top tope but Reigns counters with a Superman Punch on the way down to win the match at 12:07.
WINNER: Roman Reigns via Superman Punch
RATING: **. Kofi really carried this match with pure physicality and Woods with his verbal shenanigans and trolling. Other than that, this match was so-so with Reigns suddenly popping up and winning.

Post-match, Reigns grabs a chair at ringside and waits...Dean Ambrose arrives to take a seat at ringside. Reigns hands him the chair so he can sit down.

Triple H and Steph watch this backstage. Rollins approaches them. Steph asks if Rollins needs something. Rollins says nothing even though he wants to. He walks off for his match.

When we come back for break, it's the Handicap Match and we're two minutes into the overrun. Lovely.

MATCH #8: Seth Rollins vs. J&J Security (Jamie Noble & Joey Mercury) (w/ Kane)
Mercury and Rollins start. Rollins puts Mercury in a wristlock but Mercury reverses it. Rollins counters that and Noble tags in. Ambrose barks at Rollins. Already, this has gone on too long. Noble eats a shoulderblock and Rollins tosses him and Mercury out of the ring as the crowd maps the quickest way out of the building. J&J surround the ring with Kane on the other side. J&J swarm Rollins and clothesline him out of the ring as the crowd kinda wakes up. Rollins ends up next to Ambrose who dumps popcorn on Rollins' head. Rollins gets back into the ring and runs into a Mercury dropkick and an armbar. Rollins counters with a short-arm clothesline, then knocks Noble off the mat. Rollins tosses Mercury into the crowd barrier outside, then stomps a mudhole in Mercury. He tosses Mercury into the barrier in front of Ambrose, who gives not one shit. He drinks soda and laughs at Rollins. Rollins is furious and rolls Mercury back into the ring.

He splashes Mercury, then taunts Noble. He stomps at the hands of Mercury as part of the crowd half-heartedly chants for Joey Mercury by default. Rollins locks Mercury in a chinlock as Ambrose pounds the barrier in front of him to fire up J&J. Rollins misses a top rope attack, then a corner splash and Mercury makes a hot tag to Noble. Noble hits a lariat and then just crashes into Rollins. He hits a Swinging Neckbreaker and NEARLY gets a fall. Noble goes top rope but Rollins knocks him off. Rollins tries a suplex but Mercury grabs Rollins' leg. Noble falls on him for a two count. Chaos on the ring with a ton of counters before Rollins puts Mercury to the mat. He goes for a Buckle Bomb, tossing Mercury into Noble. Rollins slaps at Noble's face and goes for a Pedigree but Ambrose pops out of his seat, then tosses the title at Rollins. Rollins grabs it. Mercury rolls Rollins up to win it at 9:00.
WINNERS: J&J Security
RATING: **. This was your basic overbooking nonsense with the underdog heroes getting the unlikely win. Of course, that means Rollins is gonna close this sucker at MITB.

Post-match, Rollins hoists the belt, bragging in Kane's face -- but Ambrose attacks him and hits Dirty Deeds, taking the title away from Rollins once again. Ambrose grabs a ladder and climbs it, holding the title up while Rollins glares.

OVERALL: **. Ok RAW. I didn't expect much but I figured there was going to be more to this than what I just saw. The whole Lone Wolf Rollins angle is pointless as hell -- especially when we all know it isn't going anywhere. Money in the Bank is not something I'm looking forward to. Bayless is on the same line of thought. There's nobody there I'd like to see pull down the case and the status quo is going to continue with Rollins keeping the title, even though he jobs as much as Barrett does. I've actually really enjoyed Ambrose having the Championship. It's really too bad they didn't convince much of anyone that Ambrose should stay the "champion". Even if it's not Ambrose, the whole "Authority controls who's champion" angle needs to die soon. It weighs down everything.

And, of course...the Best of Monday Night Open Mic:

Regarding Neville and the "Man That Gravity Forgot" thing:
















Er...that's it.

Comments

  1. Hernia surgery???? Yeesh. Here's wishing you a speedy recovery, sir.

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  2. Thanks, Hoss! :) Most of the pain is gone and I can move well again, but my stitches are still fragile as hell.

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  3. I suggest liberal amounts of pain killers.

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  4. Fast Eddie AlbertJune 9, 2015 at 1:34 AM

    I would imagine it'll be Reigns and a quick cash-in where he turns on Ambrose or something but...if they wanted to make the case a long term thing and make it someone's gimmick...have Kofi win and have a whole thing where it's a shared case and any of the three could use it to cash-in.

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  5. Oh, no worries there. They have me on Vicodin and Advil.

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  6. I'm wondering if that's what the whole New Day/Kane feud has been about.

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  7. Fast Eddie AlbertJune 9, 2015 at 1:37 AM

    It's too bad there's only one title now. Back in the day you could have had Reigns win one case and cash-in right away, then have Kofi win the other one and wait till around WrestleMania before they paid it off.

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  8. Would've been funnier if Truth's music hit after his spiel, and he danced back up the ramp.

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  9. Based on the booking, is there ANY other story than Reigns wins and cashes it in against Ambrose? I mean that sincerely. The only guys who have been continuously protected and made to look good in anything over the last few weeks have been those guys, and smiley Roman Reigns isn't going to last. I'm not even saying they shouldn't; I'm honestly saying that there's nowhere to go with anything else. Reigns ascending to the title and turning heel as the true 'chosen one' of the Authority to play off the fans hating him last year is the only logical place they can be at this point.

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  10. The thing is that it's abrupt as fuck. They hated Reigns because he wasn't ready. Then they liked him when the title picture didn't include him -- and that's "barely liked". I don't even think WWE built up the necessary goodwill to be annoyed if he turns. It's almost a cynical move at this point.

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  11. Sure, but why wait at this point? It's a Rocky turn at this point - Everyone hated Rocky, so he was a heel, he slowly started to build cheers behind Austin, and then they turned him at SS. There is no doubt in my mind that Roman Reigns, smarmy douchebag in a suit standing next to Steph, could draw serious heat. Have him go out there and roast the fans for not getting behind him when he had his opportunity at Wrestlemania, and tell them that he wasn't going to waste his second chance, regardless of how he had to get it. Go all the way and actually turn him heel as opposed to the fans doing it because they wanted someone else - fulfill the prophecy and let the fans think they controlled it all along, that he WAS the chosen one, and let them boo the shit out of him. They need the belt on a strong heel for Lesnar anyway, and them having a rematch at Summerslam with the face/heel lines clearly drawn is a better story they can use.

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  12. I agree with that...but would Creative really wanna blow their MITB load that soon? I can't see Reigns winning the case, then turning heel 20 minutes later. They could pull it off, I suppose. But, as I said, I'm not sure WWE Creative has built up enough goodwill for the fans to be annoyed by it or to buy it. That, and Rollins is so sniveling and whiny, it's hard to take him as a "face" again. It MIGHT work if you have Reigns suddenly make it a "Triple Threat Ladder Match", winning the title in a bit of Karma against Rollins. Ambrose and Reigns feud -- THEN Reigns admits he's a heel a couple of months later.

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  13. This is fair; but I think that the turns are there. Yeah, Rollins is snivelly and whiny, but they put him in a handicap match tonight just to let him show off. And, they've been distancing him from the Authority anyway, with HHH doing the put up or shut up stuff. I think there is a way to get him face, but you have to do it carefully. They can also just keep him as a heel; whiny heel expelled from the Authority who wants his belt back. But ALL of Roman's stuff over the last few weeks has involved Ambrose to a degree that it didn't for months; I can't believe that's a coincidence. I think Reigns needs the turn at this point just to provoke that reaction from the cynical fans that sit on their hands when he comes out - let them boo him, whatever, but get a reaction. And Ambrose is clearly the top face right now, so the sympathy is off the charts when his 'best friend' turns on him. I hate to say it, but Ambrose is getting into some weird insane Sting character, where I WANT to see his friends keep turning on him because he makes such a great 'out for vengeance' guy. I just can't believe that they would have tied the two of them so closely together over the last several weeks without a big payoff, and I don't think it involves them being best buds afterwards.

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  14. Totally believe that. But, at that point, you've now screwed Ambrose out of the title. How long do you continue to knock him down on the card before fully killing the heat he has left? He barely recovered from being buried by Bray Wyatt and a TV set. Would we honestly want to see Brock Lesnar, a human bulldozer, get the title again, then vanish another six months? I think the fans have had enough of part-time champions. The ultimate payoff would have to be Ambrose eventually winning the title again.

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  15. Did Vince see Truth in the back and say "GET OUT THERE KOFI!!! YOU'RE IN THIS SEGMENT TOO!!"

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  16. In all honesty, once we had the Mania Cash-in, is there anything they can do with the MITB concept that has any value?

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  17. I think that, if Bray Wyatt didn't do it, then Ambrose is unkillable at this point, honestly. They would have to work at it. As for Lesnar, I don't think he should get the strap back, but Lesnar/Reigns is fine for the belt at Summerslam; Reigns escaping with the belt there works. Plus, you have the backup of Dean Ambrose now being on a quest to finally win that title from Reigns, which could indeed carry over to the Rumble this year if they want it to. I guess, what I'm getting at, is that Ambrose is so much better as a face chasing the belt than a face holding the belt, that I wouldn't mind seeing him chase Roman for months to finally get it back if they want to go that route. He can survive doing a job for a MITB cash-in. He survived an exploding television set.

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  18. I'm sure I'm missing something... but how exactly is a title getting elevated if nobody actually wants it?


    I'm sure there's some common core math thing going on here that I just don't understand, but Neville was given a choice which title he wanted a shot at, right? And he chose to take a shot at the NXT title instead of the prestigious US belt? A title so prestigious that Owens doesn't want it, either?


    If so, I'm in luck, because if the US belt is so prestigious, the "Jimbob Jones Euroamericasianalian Title" is the most prestigious belt in the UNIVERSE, because NOBODY wants the damn thing!

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  19. You know...it actually went by quick for me. I think it was because we didn't have 22 talking segments like last week. Even still, this show was a chore.

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  20. Nitro: December 2nd 1996. Joe Gomez and The Mountie finally lock up. That's gonna be a report for the ages.

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  21. I think you may have liked it just slightly more than Bayless did though

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  22. Yeah...I was shocked Bayless didn't talk up the show more. Usually, he finds positives in everything. That confuses me, by the way. Because I've seen him rate like 7 or 8 matches as * or ** and he'll be like "that was a solid show".

    I always wanna ask him "how do you figure?" LOL... :)

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  23. Scary thing was, he was roided in the FIRST place. So what the fuck was he taking in WCW?

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  24. Very, very few finishers have ever been given that big of a push all by their lonesome. Outside of Jake's DDT, I can't think of anything more well-protected & pushed. They've tried a few times over the years (even with Orton's RKO), but I don't think they ever managed to bring a nobody to near-Main Event status.

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  25. I actually thought the R-Truth moment was funny as hell, and the only worthwhile bit in that entire segment.

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  26. Belee_Matt!_INDEED!!!June 9, 2015 at 4:44 AM

    Hernia surgery:
    Reigns = out for 3 months
    Perri = back in a week.

    BELEE DAT.

    Of course, Perri isn't lifting Big Show's fat ass up every week, but he does have to talk about Big Show's fat ass....so really, who has it worse?

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  27. I thought their HIAC match in 2010 was pretty good. But I'm probably in the minority.

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  28. I wonder if that was the plan all along, to build him up or if they just lucked into it. But yeah, the move was basically like the golden gun in the GoldenEye game...one shot kill. He may not have won every match, but if he hit it, that was it.

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  29. Then they'd be the Wolves of (VK) Wallstreet.

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  30. Glad you're doing okay. Definitely worse situations to be in than boredom!

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  31. Can't believe we still have to wait two months for GLACIER. I trust Scott will be doing a rant on the episode of WCW Pro he debuts at!

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  32. Not enough JOE GOMEZ.

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  33. Hey I'm a huge Blackhawks fan, but that was embarrassing last night...they lost to a one legged goalie, who, the game before, had diarrhea...the Blackhawks have no one to blame but themselves...

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  34. Miz, derssed like a Muslim woman - line of the night.

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  35. Ahmed Johnson wasn't a gladiator. And Ron Simmons was just confused.

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  36. I like it how it is. If the match gets a decent rating, then I'll read it, but I don't want to read two paragraphs of a one star match.

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  37. Wait a minute...

    You may not be familiar with the common types
    Of hernias that you could get
    So just settle down, let me clue you in
    There's Incomplete (Incomplete!)
    Epigastric (Epigastric!)
    Bladder, huh! (Bladder!)
    Strangulated (Strangulated!)
    Lumbar Hernia (Lumbar Hernia!)
    Richter's Hernia (Richter's Hernia!)
    Obstructed, ow! (Obstructed!)
    Inguinal and Direct!

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  38. Speaking of Farooq Asad? What was that orginal gimmick? Was it seriously a Roman (Arab?) Gladiator? I mean having a pseudo NOI group wasn't much better, in spite that it fit Simmons persona better. I mean Simmons was either a low key football player wrestler, a semi-retired babyface that shouted DANG (edited) a lot, or was a angry person. That was his character range. Too bad he couldn't have been Ron Simmons going DANG in 1997 - he would have eon the world title off of that gimmick.

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  39. Best damned avatar in da bizness TODAY!

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  40. DDP was Bischoff's pal, so it was definitely the plan. Booking an unstoppable finisher, having him win all his matches, having him stand up to the nWo... it was a very concentrated effort to make him a huge star. Very rarely has it worked that well, either.

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  41. I'm sad about Glacier and Mortal Kombat suing - because seriously a Midcard storyline of the BRC (Blood Runs Cold) would have been amazing. I mean Madusa could have joined instead of retiring. Ernest Miller would have worked as a Carl Weathers babyface. I mean James Mitchel as the evil Dunegon keeper with Mortis and Wrath was awesome. Throw Steve Blackman in as a babyface in the vein of Chuck Norris and have real cameos from martial artists such as Bob Wall could have made this work. The BRC angle could have been NXT years before NXT. They could have rehired Chris Champion as Yoshi Kwan. Muta could have come in as Vandenberg's secret weapon. BRC had potential. But Acclaim ruined it.

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  42. I thought the NoD was a great gimmick, but they took all the teeth out of it. It's understandable though.

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  43. Apparently, Vince's idea of a "massive push" for a Diva is to let them stand quietly on the ramp instead of jobbing to Cena's girlfriend.

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  44. The Norton thing isn't as dumb as it seems - he's costing Train matches leading up to their confrontation, in the name of "protection".

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  45. You're assuming that one thing will lead to another. That's NXT, not RAW.

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  46. Belee_Matt!_INDEED!!!June 9, 2015 at 6:17 AM

    I figured the hernias were different, but that would ruin me making fun of Big Show, and that's something that must continue to happen.

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  47. Belee_Matt!_INDEED!!!June 9, 2015 at 6:18 AM

    Well, it *is* better than jobbing to Cena's girlfriend. I'll give him that.

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  48. Belee_Matt!_INDEED!!!June 9, 2015 at 6:19 AM

    Don't worry. They will.

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  49. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oggcnIKZ9Po

    This might be the only entertaining thing from this show

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  50. Yeah, the July 29th show is when Hall and Nash attack Rey and others backstage.

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  51. It was. It was probably the only legitimately funny direct attempt at comedy by the WWE in quite some time.

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  52. If nobody wanted it, nobody would have answered any of Cena's open challenges. Owens and Neville are outliers in that Neville has unfinished business with Owens specifically and Owens' issue with Cena goes beyond the U.S. title.

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  53. I thought the militant black leader gimmick was good for him but what was funny was that at first his henchmen was Crush and Savio Vega and he had PG-13 rapping their theme until they revamped the nation into an actual black gang.

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  54. So you're saying we've let it play out and now we've seen where it went?

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  55. Mix in some booze and you're all set (kidding)!

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  56. Truth vs. objects might save north american wrestling

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  57. Macklin, Man Without FearJune 9, 2015 at 6:47 AM

    I really enjoy both guys but they just don't click.

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  58. I had RAW on for about 30 seconds and all I caught was the R-Truth deal. That was pretty funny, so I kept watching...until Sheamus and Randy Orton came out.

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  59. Re: Reviewing Raw vs Reviewing Nitro

    Just follow your heart, that's what I always do.

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  60. Kane would have actually been some what enjoyable if he got so pissed off at the interruptions that he just threw his fists down and it set off his turnbuckle pyros.

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  61. two...*good* wrestlers?

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  62. Belee_Matt!_INDEED!!!June 9, 2015 at 6:52 AM

    Don't say you didn't watch Raw, or the BoD police will come out and say something smarmy about you telling us you didn't watch Raw.

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  63. Belee_Matt!_INDEED!!!June 9, 2015 at 6:55 AM

    First segment: cool. First match: cool. Everything else, I was t-total bored. It was paint-by-numbers at best. I know it's easy to stick with a certain format, but man, it makes every week seem exactly the same. I wish they would chuck the format out the window for once. They did one thing different this week, and it was the opening segment. As soon as those first 20 minutes were up, we were back to the same ol', same ol'.

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  64. It was literally Ron Simmons in Gladiator gear. He wore the Roman stuff but was talking about living on the mean streets and calling Ahmed a privileged uncle Tom. JR was already acknowledging his football background and such too. It was one of those goofy things that nobody put much thought into.

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  65. With all the spinal injuries with Kidd and Bryan ...Orton dropping Sheamus back first onto the announce table with the monitors still in place seems crazy needless.

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  66. That had to be funny. "Farooq Assad, the All American nose tackle from Florida State."

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  67. The Savage feud was huge for him also.

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  68. These things are great for when Scott does his Scott Sez re-rants in a decade and has no clue what the hell it was all about

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  69. "I must have been going through a phase then." Lol

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  70. That's completly wrong : Kevin Owens refused to answer Cena's challenge because said he already had a title that means more to him.
    Neville already answer Cena's challenged in the past, wich means he also wants the title, but last night he wanted to put Kevin Owens in his place more.

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  71. Was there a good match between Austin and Undertaker?

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  72. Weeeell It's a Big ShowJune 9, 2015 at 7:29 AM

    This review gave me hernia

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  73. Weeeell It's a Big ShowJune 9, 2015 at 7:32 AM

    cool

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  74. SummerSlam 1998 was alright.

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  75. I, for one, love the alternating rants, and I hope they continue (though I totally understand why Scott would rather review Raw than Nitro)

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  76. Definitely. Summerslam '98, Cold Day in Hell '97 and a random Raw match they had sometime in '96 (I think) were all really good.

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  77. Yes, Sheamus and Orton are both good wrestlers.

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  78. To be fair, I find most of what J&J do pretty funny. They're just innately brilliant at that, though!

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  79. OH. OK, I didn't see that flick. Only DiCaprio movie I've seen and liked was Gangs of New York. And that flick was all Daniel Day-Lewis.

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  80. (stumbles his way toward the mic) Thanks, bookerman, for that great bottle of Jack. *hiccup* I love my role. Now I'm shut-, shut-, shut-, Zzz.

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  81. He has to review the whole show though, not just the cena/owens bits.

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  82. I just think that was because they were scared to go all the way with it. It could easily go off the rails quickly

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  83. Have to agree with Bayless here on the MizTV thing. I usually hate these MizTV segments, but Ryback came off as very natural, scripted or not, and that's only playing in his favor. Big Show came off great here too, like a true vet. It was almost as if they were given free reign to just get their points across. I also liked how at first, both guys were calling Miz out on what he was trying to do. It gave a little depth to two characters who are usually painfullt one-dimesnional. I don't think they should have had Ryback do the Shell Shock on Raw, but the crowd went nuts, so what do I know?

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  84. For RAW, I feel that storyline advancement is far more important than match quality. Match quality, to me,is more important for PPV's.

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  85. What's the source on Acclaim suing or filing a C&D? It doesn't make much sense on the surface--Glacier was clearly the closest Mortal Kombat analogue and it's not like they got rid of the gimmick.

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  86. THEFELINE Randy OrtonJune 9, 2015 at 9:32 AM

    I had all of them

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  87. Whoo Hoo, Lets go to alternating for as long as we can until they upload 97 Nitro

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  88. I wish they'd switch Saxton and Graves--throw Saxton on the RAW pre-show on the Network and let Graves do commentary on RAW (and PPV). To fill Graves' spot on the PPV pre-show, bring in Otunga (who's already on the RAW pre-show).

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  89. What a champion that Seth Rollins is haha. US title > WWE title at this point in time by a mile my friends. Cena and Owens should close MITB.

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  90. Many, if not most hernias could in theory strangle intestine at some point leading to a life or death situation. What *may* have happened with Reigns is that being his body goes through so much on a regular basis as part of his job is that he didn't notice right away warning signals that the hernia was getting bad and/or he may have little to no insurance due to the way wrestlers are paid (independent contractors without health benefits as far as I know).
    How can you be bored? You have a huge movie collection, hundreds of channels on TV and literally hundreds if not thousands of people here who will argue with you if you miss the crazies at work to yell. ;)

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  91. The GAYSEX PREDATOR?

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  92. The two hottest feuds involve Cena and 3 up-and-comers so that's a plus.
    The Rollins/Authority stuff is a bit confusing. Makes Rollins feels like the underdog going into the match. The cowardly heel should look like the underdog, but not really because of his backup. Or is this going to be a shocking swerve and everyone supports Rollins come Money in the Bank? Seems like it has to be either that, or a Shield reunion, right?

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  93. Yeah, and the one problem with starting off with the Open Challenge is then we didn't have it later in the show to cpie things up.

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  94. How dare you tell people they can't tell people not to tell people they didn't watch Raw.

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  95. I think it was more that Neville wanted to FIGHT Owens to shut him up.

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  96. The chase and fake outs are fun, though. And it helps make new stars just by carrying around the case. Remember when Ambrose would stalk Rollins and foil his cash ins? That was gold.

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  97. It works if he cashes in on Ambrose. It's much easier to siphon heat when it's a heal taking from a face. Screw over a popular champion = insta-heel.

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  98. They should have kept Rowan and Harper as a tag team when they broke up the Wyatts.

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  99. AverageJoeEverymanJune 9, 2015 at 10:58 AM

    yeah it seemed a meta joke that R Truth always gets pushed into these upper mid card schmozz matches for no reason like the Ladder match at WM and the EC.

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  100. Adam "Colorado" CurryJune 9, 2015 at 12:10 PM

    Fuck off and die.

    ReplyDelete
  101. Itwas short, sweet, didn't seem overly scripted, and played into a bit of continuity. How hard is that? Perfectly acceptable comedy.

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  102. Al Lobama is Back BaybayJune 9, 2015 at 12:24 PM

    This review gave me Herpes

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  103. Al Lobama is Back BaybayJune 9, 2015 at 12:24 PM

    Fuck off and die.

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  104. Man, I already missed Tuesday Troll's goofball fun hour.

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  105. My guess is that we are building towards a Shield reunion, since that was the one thing WWE fans have actually been vocally excited about (at Payback) since the "Yes!" movement died.

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  106. Not a fan. Of either.

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  107. That's fine. Neither is one of my super-duper favorites, either. They're still really good wrestlers.

    ReplyDelete
  108. Did you know that you can make cash by locking premium pages of your blog or site?
    Simply join Mgcash and implement their content locking plugin.

    ReplyDelete

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