WWE Elimination Chamber 2012
February 19, 2012
The Bradley Center - Milwaukee, Wisconsin
- Our opening video consists as a historical look back at past Chambers. AAAAAND now WWE presents...the Elimination Chamber! Pyro kicks us off with all white ropes tonight.
- Your hosts tonight are Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and Booker T.
WWE CHAMPIONSHIP
ELIMINATION CHAMBER
1. Chris Jericho vs. The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler (with Vickie Guerrero) vs. R-Truth vs. Kofi Kingston vs. CM Punk
- Odd that this is opening tonight's show. I'll be pissed if Cena ends it here tonight. Punk will begin with Kofi. Kofi with a headlock and Punk shoots him off. Kofi leaps over the top rope and about fudges it in the process. Kofi hits the ropes and sunset flips for 1. Reversals of near falls for both men. Punk battles a backslide, Kofi counters and Punk lifts for a GTS. Kofi wiggles out and dropkicks Punk down for 1. Punk tries a suplex to the outside, Kofi floats over and backdrops Punk on the steel grate. Punk counters a kick and catapults Kofi into the BULLETPROOF plexiglass. Back inside, Punk kicks Kofi down in the corner. Punk slams him down for 2. #3 into the ring is....Dolph Ziggler. Dolph attacks Punk and rakes the eyes. He uses the Chamber to do pull ups and drops a leg on Punk. Cover inside gets 2. Dolph charges the corner and Punk moves. Kofi clotheslines him down. Kofi and Punk both springboard towards Dolph and KNOCK EACH OTHER OUT IN MID AIR! Punk covers Kofi for 2. #4 into the match will be...R-Truth. He attacks Dolph and uppercuts him. Dolph charges and gets hiptossed up and over to the floor. Dolph rolled in and covered for 2.8! Punk charges Truth in the corner and gets caught. Truth gets crotched and Punk nails him in the face with a knee. Superplex on Truth gets 2.5. Kofi gets tossed up and over. Punk with a Randy Savage elbow on Truth and Truth is eliminated @ 11:47. Kofi back in and tosses Dolph on his back, for the third time, to the floor. Kofi springboards to the Chamber wall and hits a TORNADO DDT ON DOLPH ON THE STEEL! #5 in is...The Miz. Miz attacks Punk and throws his shoulder into the ringpost. He drives his knee into the face of Kofi against the chain wall. Miz drives Kofi into the ringpost and pushes him over the post. Back inside, Miz covers Kofi for 2. Miz goes for the Skull Crushing Finale on Punk and Punk rolls him up for 2. Anaconda Vice is locked in on the Miz! Here comes Jericho! Jericho clotheslines him down for 1. Jericho goes for the Walls of Jericho and Punk wiggles out. Jericho with the facebuster. LIONSAULT! Cover gets 2.5. Dolph rolls up Jericho and he hits a CODEBREAKER to eliminate Dolph @ 19:07. Punk catapults Jericho up and over to the steel. Jericho goes in his Chamber pod and locks himself in. Punk runs in and attacks him. Jericho catches Punk in the doorway and slams the door on Punk! Miz and Kofi back in the ring. Miz kicks Kofi low and beats him down in the corner. Miz misses a corner charge and Kofi kicks him in the face. Kofi heads up top. Miz meets him there. Punk powerbombs him off the top for 2.5. Kofi is on top of the chamber pod. High cross body on both men. He covers Miz for 2.5. Here comes Jericho with the Walls of Jericho. Kofi taps out @ 25:27. Jericho attacks Kofi as he crawls to the door. He throws him out the Chamber. Punk throws Jericho out and takes out the camera man. Jericho is knocked out and the referees are checking on him. Medical staff are out now and Jericho is not moving. Back inside the Chamber. We are down to Punk and Miz. Miz tries the neckbreaker and Punk kicks him in the head. Cover gets 2.5. Punk nails the running knee into the bulldog for 2.5. Punk on the apron. He springboards into the Skull Crushing Finale! Cover gets 2.8! Miz drives Punk back to the corner. He beats on Punk from the second rope. He punks Punk in the face and knees him down. Miz charges the corner and hits the plexiglass. GTS connects and CM Punk wins it @ 32:34. (You can thank Dolph and Kofi for making this match good. Punk had to carry it during the low spots, but really had 6 great athletes in there. Miz even stepped it up slightly. B.)
- We see highlights of NXT's finest being eliminated in the Smackdown battle royal. We see Santino Marella dressed up like Rocky Balboa and is about to have an egg shake, to the tune of Eugene's music. He tastes one egg and about pukes.
- Now more John Cena videos to hog up the PPV.
WWE DIVAS CHAMPIONSHIP
2. Beth Phoenix vs. Tamina Snuka
- Beth pays homage to Roddy Piper with flannel on her outfit tonight. No pop for Tamina. Beth misses a clothesline and runs into a double chop. Cover gets 2. Beth up and tries to headbutt Tamina. No sell and down goes Beth. Tamina heads up top and Beth kicks her to the floor. Tamina back inside and Beth chinlocks her. Tamina tries to elbow out and Beth slams her down on her head. Dragon Sleeper by Beth. Samoan Drop by Tamina breaks the hold. Tamina heads up to the top. Beth meets her there and superplexes her down. Tamina up and splashes Beth in the corner. She shops Beth down again. Tamina heads up top. Superfly Splash only gets 2.5!!! Glam Slam by Beth finishes it off @ 7:18. (These two didn't really look great together in the ring. But they looked better than any other Divas match in the last couple of weeks. C.)
- Santino boxes hanging meat in the cooler. Elsewhere, Jericho is still being tended to by doctors in the back.
- Headed to the ring is John Laurinaitis with David Otunga. He says there is scrutiny among Smackdown for the job Teddy Long is doing. Out comes ALBERTO DEL RIO! He says Teddy Long is a piece of trash and shouldn't be in wrestling. He has an idea for Laurinaitis. He thinks he should be the permanent GM for Raw AND Smackdown. Out comes Mark Henry. He says Long is a bully and physically assaulted him. He says they never have seen eye to eye. He agrees with Alberto. OUT COMES CHRISTIAN! He says he should have been in the Elimination Chamber match if it wasn't for TL. Christian supports Laurinaitis for GM too. They take a photo together.
- Backstage, Santino jogs in slow motion. Elsewhere, Josh Matthews is standing by with the Big Show. He sells everyone on him. He shouldn't have to. WWE thinks he should, though.
WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP
ELIMINATION CHAMBER MATCH
3. The Great Khali vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Santino Marella vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Wade Barrett vs. The Big Show
- Show and Barrett to start this one as Show chops Barrett in the corner. Barrett hits the ropes and takes out Show's knee. He covers for 1. On the outside, Barrett rams Show's head into the chamber wall. Back inside, Barrett works over Show against the ropes. He stomps the ankle. Show is back up and suplexes Barrett. Cover gets 2. Show walks over the chest over Barrett. #3 coming in is...Cody Rhodes. Cody takes his time and gets caught with a Big Show chop. Show stares down DB and Cody attacks. Show tosses Cody over the top to the steel. Show launches Cody over his head into the chamber wall. He goozles Barrett, but he side steps a Chokeslam and takes the knee out. Cody and Barrett with a Hi-Low on Show. Barrett turns on Cody on the outside and throws him into the Chamber wall. #4 in is Santino Marella. He throws some Road Dogg rights and hiptosses Barrett down. He shakes the ropes like the Ultimate Warrior. Show grabs him and throws him by his head. Cody takes out Show's leg. Show chops Cody down and tosses him and Barrett to the outside. Show comes outside and Cody and Barrett with a suplex! Cody turns on Barrett and sends him down. Moonsault by Cody nails Barrett for 2! He grabs Santino. He rams his arm into the wall. #5 is...The Great Khali. He lays waste to everyone in the ring. Punjabi Plunge for Barrett and Cody. Show SPEARS Khali and Khali is eliminated @ 16:30. Show gets up and stares down Bryan. He climbs up and reaches through the top and swipes at Bryan. Show rips the chains off the roof and breaks through the top. He pounds on Bryan. He headbutts Bryan over and over and chokes him with his boot. Bryan is officially in the match. Bryan escapes and Show catches him. He THROWS BRYAN THROUGH THE POD WALL! Back in the ring and he clotheslines Bryan down. Show chokeslams Bryan and Barrett boots him in the face. Barrett Barrage on Show. Santino rolls up Barrett for 2.5. Beautiful Disaster on Show on the outside! Another one! Show back in the ring. Low DDT on Show. Barrett off the second rope with an elbow. Show is eliminated @ 22:36. Santino with a roll up on Cody and pins him @ 23:06. Cody with a Cross Rhodes on Santino! Barrett covers and Santino KICKS OUT! Barrett throws him over the top to the outside. He puts Santino's arms outside the chamber and knees him in the ribs. Santino lays crucified against the wall. Barrett is in the ring with Bryan. Bryan botches the walk up the ropes. Crucifix on Barrett gets 2. LeBell Lock on Barrett. He fights out and Bryan kicks him back. Bryan kicks Barrett to the chest and heads up top. Bryan is crotched on the top rope. Barrett clotheslines Bryan down. Bryan is on the outside. Barrett lifts for a powerbomb and THROW BRYAN INTO THE WALL! He closes the pod door on Bryan's head and slams it! Cover back inside gets 2. Santino is back in the ring and Barrett lifts for Wasteland. Santino grabs the ropes. Big boot sends Santino back outside. Bryan knees Barrett off the top rope and drops Barrett. He rams Barrett into the pod wall and heads up top. Barrett crotches him. Barrett smashes Bryan's head through the pod wall. Barrett grabs Bryan for a Wasteland and Santino knocks him off. Santino grabs Barrett and they battle for a superplex. Barrett shoves him down. Barrett misses a top rope elbow. Bryan off the top with a headbutt. Santino covers and eliminates Barrett @ 30:37. Down to Bryan and Santino. Bryan snapmares him over and kicks Santino in the back. Bryan covers for 2.5. Bryan misses a charge and Santino rolls him up for 2.5. Bryan heads up top. Headbutt misses! Cobra time? COBRA STRIKE! Cover gets 2.9!!!!!!!! Right into the LeBell Lock! Santino fights and Bryan cinches in and Santino taps out @ 34:03. (For what we just witnessed, I am in awe. A LOT better than I thought would have come out of this match. You knew Santino wasn't going over, but they made him look like a million bucks. Cody and Barrett really shined in this match. Dare I say better than the Raw match? Yes I do! B+.)
- Out comes Sheamus and he walks into the Chamber. He drops Bryan on his head and poses over him. Cole questions if Sheamus has chosen DB as his opponent. Yes, you dumb shit!
- Backstage, Hornswoggle eats cheese. Natalya farts. Swagger and Vickie walk in. Justin Gabriel is standing next to Hornswoggle. Teddy Long walks up to him. What is final result, you got it: US title defense. Teddy tells Swagger that HE should be running both shows.
- Rock DVD out Tuesday.
WWE UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP
4. Jack Swagger (with Vickie Guerrero) vs. Justin Gabriel (with Hornswoggle)
- Gabriel kicks Swagger and tries a huricarana. Swagger powerbombs him and hits a Swagger Bomb. He does push ups on the back of Gabriel. Gabriel ducks a clothesline and hits a forearm. Forearm off the top rope gets 2. Swagger rolls to the outside and Gabriel jumps over the top on him. Back inside, Swagger takes out the knee. Ankle Lock and Gabriel taps out @ 3:03. (Really no reason for this match. I guess they needed to buy some time? D.)
- Rock....Cena...WRESTLEMANIA! Lawler announces that Undertaker will be calling out Triple H on Raw tomorrow. We prepare for the main event. If you can call it that.
MAIN EVENT?
AMBULANCE MATCH
5. Kane vs. John Cena
- Brawl begins and they go to the floor. Cena slams Kane into the guardrail. Kane boots Cena down in the aisle. Kane opens the ambulance door and nails Cena with the stretcher. Cena grabs a board and nails Kane. Kane is up and throws Cena into the guardrail in the aisle. Cena moves and Kane is thrown into the steel steps. We finally get back in the ring and Kane kneels over Cena and hammers away. Back to the outside and Cena kicks Kane backwards. They go back in the ring and Kane clubs Cena in the face. Cena fights back and runs into a sidewalk slam. SUPERCENA is right back up with a turning back suplex. 5 Knuckle Shuffle. Goes for the AA, and Kane rakes the eyes. He muzzles Cena down to the mat. Kane drags an unconscious Cena out the ring and put him in a wheel chair. Cena comes to in the aisle and battles out the chair. He slams Kane into the guardrail. He throws him into the side of the ambulance. Cena grabs the wheelchair and nails Kane in the head with it. Cena rolls Kane into the side of the stage with the wheelchair. Kane is up and throws a laptop at Cena. Cena grabs a chair and wears out Kane with it. Kane puts on the brakes and Cena runs into barrier wall. They come back to ringside and Cena grabs a mic. He is more interested in making Booker's fave five. He nails Kane in the head with the house mic. Now a monitor for Kane's troubles. Cena grabs the steel steps and nails Kane in the head with it. Is this really EMBRACING THE HATE? Cena carries Kane on top of the steps to the announce table for the AA. Kane wiggles down and chokeslams CENA THROUGH THE TABLE! Kane goes back for the stretcher and puts Cena on it. Cena is in the ambulance. Kane goes to close the door and Cena kicks out. He slams Kane into the doors of the ambulance. Cena gets Kane to chase him to the top of the ambulance. They battle on top and Kane goes to Chokeslam Cena. Cena floats over and ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT OFF THE AMBULANCE TO THE FLOOR! Cena puts Kane in the ambulance and wins the match @ 21:19. (A wide open brawl with all the usual spots. Nothing special. I would not have ended the show like that. To many variables they could have used. C-.)
FINAL THOUGHTS...
- 5 matches highlighted by the Elimination Chamber matches. Everything else would not have been good even on a Raw or Smackdown. I guess you could say you got your moneys worth (if you even paid for the show) out of the EC matches. I do like that Punk kept the belt. But Sheamus laying out DB makes your champion look weak as shit. See you Thursday for Impact.
February 19, 2012
The Bradley Center - Milwaukee, Wisconsin
- Our opening video consists as a historical look back at past Chambers. AAAAAND now WWE presents...the Elimination Chamber! Pyro kicks us off with all white ropes tonight.
- Your hosts tonight are Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and Booker T.
WWE CHAMPIONSHIP
ELIMINATION CHAMBER
1. Chris Jericho vs. The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler (with Vickie Guerrero) vs. R-Truth vs. Kofi Kingston vs. CM Punk
- Odd that this is opening tonight's show. I'll be pissed if Cena ends it here tonight. Punk will begin with Kofi. Kofi with a headlock and Punk shoots him off. Kofi leaps over the top rope and about fudges it in the process. Kofi hits the ropes and sunset flips for 1. Reversals of near falls for both men. Punk battles a backslide, Kofi counters and Punk lifts for a GTS. Kofi wiggles out and dropkicks Punk down for 1. Punk tries a suplex to the outside, Kofi floats over and backdrops Punk on the steel grate. Punk counters a kick and catapults Kofi into the BULLETPROOF plexiglass. Back inside, Punk kicks Kofi down in the corner. Punk slams him down for 2. #3 into the ring is....Dolph Ziggler. Dolph attacks Punk and rakes the eyes. He uses the Chamber to do pull ups and drops a leg on Punk. Cover inside gets 2. Dolph charges the corner and Punk moves. Kofi clotheslines him down. Kofi and Punk both springboard towards Dolph and KNOCK EACH OTHER OUT IN MID AIR! Punk covers Kofi for 2. #4 into the match will be...R-Truth. He attacks Dolph and uppercuts him. Dolph charges and gets hiptossed up and over to the floor. Dolph rolled in and covered for 2.8! Punk charges Truth in the corner and gets caught. Truth gets crotched and Punk nails him in the face with a knee. Superplex on Truth gets 2.5. Kofi gets tossed up and over. Punk with a Randy Savage elbow on Truth and Truth is eliminated @ 11:47. Kofi back in and tosses Dolph on his back, for the third time, to the floor. Kofi springboards to the Chamber wall and hits a TORNADO DDT ON DOLPH ON THE STEEL! #5 in is...The Miz. Miz attacks Punk and throws his shoulder into the ringpost. He drives his knee into the face of Kofi against the chain wall. Miz drives Kofi into the ringpost and pushes him over the post. Back inside, Miz covers Kofi for 2. Miz goes for the Skull Crushing Finale on Punk and Punk rolls him up for 2. Anaconda Vice is locked in on the Miz! Here comes Jericho! Jericho clotheslines him down for 1. Jericho goes for the Walls of Jericho and Punk wiggles out. Jericho with the facebuster. LIONSAULT! Cover gets 2.5. Dolph rolls up Jericho and he hits a CODEBREAKER to eliminate Dolph @ 19:07. Punk catapults Jericho up and over to the steel. Jericho goes in his Chamber pod and locks himself in. Punk runs in and attacks him. Jericho catches Punk in the doorway and slams the door on Punk! Miz and Kofi back in the ring. Miz kicks Kofi low and beats him down in the corner. Miz misses a corner charge and Kofi kicks him in the face. Kofi heads up top. Miz meets him there. Punk powerbombs him off the top for 2.5. Kofi is on top of the chamber pod. High cross body on both men. He covers Miz for 2.5. Here comes Jericho with the Walls of Jericho. Kofi taps out @ 25:27. Jericho attacks Kofi as he crawls to the door. He throws him out the Chamber. Punk throws Jericho out and takes out the camera man. Jericho is knocked out and the referees are checking on him. Medical staff are out now and Jericho is not moving. Back inside the Chamber. We are down to Punk and Miz. Miz tries the neckbreaker and Punk kicks him in the head. Cover gets 2.5. Punk nails the running knee into the bulldog for 2.5. Punk on the apron. He springboards into the Skull Crushing Finale! Cover gets 2.8! Miz drives Punk back to the corner. He beats on Punk from the second rope. He punks Punk in the face and knees him down. Miz charges the corner and hits the plexiglass. GTS connects and CM Punk wins it @ 32:34. (You can thank Dolph and Kofi for making this match good. Punk had to carry it during the low spots, but really had 6 great athletes in there. Miz even stepped it up slightly. B.)
- We see highlights of NXT's finest being eliminated in the Smackdown battle royal. We see Santino Marella dressed up like Rocky Balboa and is about to have an egg shake, to the tune of Eugene's music. He tastes one egg and about pukes.
- Now more John Cena videos to hog up the PPV.
WWE DIVAS CHAMPIONSHIP
2. Beth Phoenix vs. Tamina Snuka
- Beth pays homage to Roddy Piper with flannel on her outfit tonight. No pop for Tamina. Beth misses a clothesline and runs into a double chop. Cover gets 2. Beth up and tries to headbutt Tamina. No sell and down goes Beth. Tamina heads up top and Beth kicks her to the floor. Tamina back inside and Beth chinlocks her. Tamina tries to elbow out and Beth slams her down on her head. Dragon Sleeper by Beth. Samoan Drop by Tamina breaks the hold. Tamina heads up to the top. Beth meets her there and superplexes her down. Tamina up and splashes Beth in the corner. She shops Beth down again. Tamina heads up top. Superfly Splash only gets 2.5!!! Glam Slam by Beth finishes it off @ 7:18. (These two didn't really look great together in the ring. But they looked better than any other Divas match in the last couple of weeks. C.)
- Santino boxes hanging meat in the cooler. Elsewhere, Jericho is still being tended to by doctors in the back.
- Headed to the ring is John Laurinaitis with David Otunga. He says there is scrutiny among Smackdown for the job Teddy Long is doing. Out comes ALBERTO DEL RIO! He says Teddy Long is a piece of trash and shouldn't be in wrestling. He has an idea for Laurinaitis. He thinks he should be the permanent GM for Raw AND Smackdown. Out comes Mark Henry. He says Long is a bully and physically assaulted him. He says they never have seen eye to eye. He agrees with Alberto. OUT COMES CHRISTIAN! He says he should have been in the Elimination Chamber match if it wasn't for TL. Christian supports Laurinaitis for GM too. They take a photo together.
- Backstage, Santino jogs in slow motion. Elsewhere, Josh Matthews is standing by with the Big Show. He sells everyone on him. He shouldn't have to. WWE thinks he should, though.
WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP
ELIMINATION CHAMBER MATCH
3. The Great Khali vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Santino Marella vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Wade Barrett vs. The Big Show
- Show and Barrett to start this one as Show chops Barrett in the corner. Barrett hits the ropes and takes out Show's knee. He covers for 1. On the outside, Barrett rams Show's head into the chamber wall. Back inside, Barrett works over Show against the ropes. He stomps the ankle. Show is back up and suplexes Barrett. Cover gets 2. Show walks over the chest over Barrett. #3 coming in is...Cody Rhodes. Cody takes his time and gets caught with a Big Show chop. Show stares down DB and Cody attacks. Show tosses Cody over the top to the steel. Show launches Cody over his head into the chamber wall. He goozles Barrett, but he side steps a Chokeslam and takes the knee out. Cody and Barrett with a Hi-Low on Show. Barrett turns on Cody on the outside and throws him into the Chamber wall. #4 in is Santino Marella. He throws some Road Dogg rights and hiptosses Barrett down. He shakes the ropes like the Ultimate Warrior. Show grabs him and throws him by his head. Cody takes out Show's leg. Show chops Cody down and tosses him and Barrett to the outside. Show comes outside and Cody and Barrett with a suplex! Cody turns on Barrett and sends him down. Moonsault by Cody nails Barrett for 2! He grabs Santino. He rams his arm into the wall. #5 is...The Great Khali. He lays waste to everyone in the ring. Punjabi Plunge for Barrett and Cody. Show SPEARS Khali and Khali is eliminated @ 16:30. Show gets up and stares down Bryan. He climbs up and reaches through the top and swipes at Bryan. Show rips the chains off the roof and breaks through the top. He pounds on Bryan. He headbutts Bryan over and over and chokes him with his boot. Bryan is officially in the match. Bryan escapes and Show catches him. He THROWS BRYAN THROUGH THE POD WALL! Back in the ring and he clotheslines Bryan down. Show chokeslams Bryan and Barrett boots him in the face. Barrett Barrage on Show. Santino rolls up Barrett for 2.5. Beautiful Disaster on Show on the outside! Another one! Show back in the ring. Low DDT on Show. Barrett off the second rope with an elbow. Show is eliminated @ 22:36. Santino with a roll up on Cody and pins him @ 23:06. Cody with a Cross Rhodes on Santino! Barrett covers and Santino KICKS OUT! Barrett throws him over the top to the outside. He puts Santino's arms outside the chamber and knees him in the ribs. Santino lays crucified against the wall. Barrett is in the ring with Bryan. Bryan botches the walk up the ropes. Crucifix on Barrett gets 2. LeBell Lock on Barrett. He fights out and Bryan kicks him back. Bryan kicks Barrett to the chest and heads up top. Bryan is crotched on the top rope. Barrett clotheslines Bryan down. Bryan is on the outside. Barrett lifts for a powerbomb and THROW BRYAN INTO THE WALL! He closes the pod door on Bryan's head and slams it! Cover back inside gets 2. Santino is back in the ring and Barrett lifts for Wasteland. Santino grabs the ropes. Big boot sends Santino back outside. Bryan knees Barrett off the top rope and drops Barrett. He rams Barrett into the pod wall and heads up top. Barrett crotches him. Barrett smashes Bryan's head through the pod wall. Barrett grabs Bryan for a Wasteland and Santino knocks him off. Santino grabs Barrett and they battle for a superplex. Barrett shoves him down. Barrett misses a top rope elbow. Bryan off the top with a headbutt. Santino covers and eliminates Barrett @ 30:37. Down to Bryan and Santino. Bryan snapmares him over and kicks Santino in the back. Bryan covers for 2.5. Bryan misses a charge and Santino rolls him up for 2.5. Bryan heads up top. Headbutt misses! Cobra time? COBRA STRIKE! Cover gets 2.9!!!!!!!! Right into the LeBell Lock! Santino fights and Bryan cinches in and Santino taps out @ 34:03. (For what we just witnessed, I am in awe. A LOT better than I thought would have come out of this match. You knew Santino wasn't going over, but they made him look like a million bucks. Cody and Barrett really shined in this match. Dare I say better than the Raw match? Yes I do! B+.)
- Out comes Sheamus and he walks into the Chamber. He drops Bryan on his head and poses over him. Cole questions if Sheamus has chosen DB as his opponent. Yes, you dumb shit!
- Backstage, Hornswoggle eats cheese. Natalya farts. Swagger and Vickie walk in. Justin Gabriel is standing next to Hornswoggle. Teddy Long walks up to him. What is final result, you got it: US title defense. Teddy tells Swagger that HE should be running both shows.
- Rock DVD out Tuesday.
WWE UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP
4. Jack Swagger (with Vickie Guerrero) vs. Justin Gabriel (with Hornswoggle)
- Gabriel kicks Swagger and tries a huricarana. Swagger powerbombs him and hits a Swagger Bomb. He does push ups on the back of Gabriel. Gabriel ducks a clothesline and hits a forearm. Forearm off the top rope gets 2. Swagger rolls to the outside and Gabriel jumps over the top on him. Back inside, Swagger takes out the knee. Ankle Lock and Gabriel taps out @ 3:03. (Really no reason for this match. I guess they needed to buy some time? D.)
- Rock....Cena...WRESTLEMANIA! Lawler announces that Undertaker will be calling out Triple H on Raw tomorrow. We prepare for the main event. If you can call it that.
MAIN EVENT?
AMBULANCE MATCH
5. Kane vs. John Cena
- Brawl begins and they go to the floor. Cena slams Kane into the guardrail. Kane boots Cena down in the aisle. Kane opens the ambulance door and nails Cena with the stretcher. Cena grabs a board and nails Kane. Kane is up and throws Cena into the guardrail in the aisle. Cena moves and Kane is thrown into the steel steps. We finally get back in the ring and Kane kneels over Cena and hammers away. Back to the outside and Cena kicks Kane backwards. They go back in the ring and Kane clubs Cena in the face. Cena fights back and runs into a sidewalk slam. SUPERCENA is right back up with a turning back suplex. 5 Knuckle Shuffle. Goes for the AA, and Kane rakes the eyes. He muzzles Cena down to the mat. Kane drags an unconscious Cena out the ring and put him in a wheel chair. Cena comes to in the aisle and battles out the chair. He slams Kane into the guardrail. He throws him into the side of the ambulance. Cena grabs the wheelchair and nails Kane in the head with it. Cena rolls Kane into the side of the stage with the wheelchair. Kane is up and throws a laptop at Cena. Cena grabs a chair and wears out Kane with it. Kane puts on the brakes and Cena runs into barrier wall. They come back to ringside and Cena grabs a mic. He is more interested in making Booker's fave five. He nails Kane in the head with the house mic. Now a monitor for Kane's troubles. Cena grabs the steel steps and nails Kane in the head with it. Is this really EMBRACING THE HATE? Cena carries Kane on top of the steps to the announce table for the AA. Kane wiggles down and chokeslams CENA THROUGH THE TABLE! Kane goes back for the stretcher and puts Cena on it. Cena is in the ambulance. Kane goes to close the door and Cena kicks out. He slams Kane into the doors of the ambulance. Cena gets Kane to chase him to the top of the ambulance. They battle on top and Kane goes to Chokeslam Cena. Cena floats over and ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT OFF THE AMBULANCE TO THE FLOOR! Cena puts Kane in the ambulance and wins the match @ 21:19. (A wide open brawl with all the usual spots. Nothing special. I would not have ended the show like that. To many variables they could have used. C-.)
FINAL THOUGHTS...
- 5 matches highlighted by the Elimination Chamber matches. Everything else would not have been good even on a Raw or Smackdown. I guess you could say you got your moneys worth (if you even paid for the show) out of the EC matches. I do like that Punk kept the belt. But Sheamus laying out DB makes your champion look weak as shit. See you Thursday for Impact.
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