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The Only Review of WWE's Falls Count Anywhere DVD That You'll Ever Need


WWE has been on a kick as of late with their releases. Trying to cover every nitch they can possibly think of. From plenty of Top [insert number] lists, to best-ofs for everything ranging from high-flying to b-series PPVs. This one right here I feel is one of their better ideas, because I love a good hardcore match. Don't get me wrong, CZW and similar trash aren't my bag, but there's nothing better than a war in the ring. When both wrestlers need no restrictions so they can make sure things end in blood.

SGT Slaughter vs. Pat Patterson - Alley Fight - MSG - May 4, 1981

It's so mind-blowing to see these early shows compared to the HD era. I am interested to see how this match ends in a fall if there's no ref. So far, about 90 percent of the match is whipping each other with a belt, and it doesn't even get interesting until Slaughter hits one of the bloodier blade jobs I've ever seen. After this, Patterson hits Slaughter with his cowboy boot, and smashes his face into the top of the turnbuckle. I know this may have been something back then, but man alive this was boring as hell. It was a lot of hitting with a belt, then a shoe, and I was waiting
for a swatch of Pat's jeans to be used. The ref just awards the match to Patterson out of the blue. 
Patterson is just given the match at 14:13 | **


Midnight Express vs. Ms. Lively & Jimmy Valliant - Atlanta Street Fight - Starrcade 1985 - November 28, 1985
You know, it'd be nice if they gave us a little history here. I mean, all of a sudden, there's Ron Garvin in drag. Match isn't much and doesn't last long. There's a lot of powder thrown, and of course, belts. 
Garvin pins Eaton after an uppercut at 6:36 | **

Barry Windham & Arn Anderson vs. DOOM - WCW Tag-Team Championship - Street Fight - Starrcade 1990 - December 16, 1990
A shame this match wasn't longer, because it's pretty damn great. Some of that classic early 90s WCW tornado tag-team brawling that ended up building ECW. They're all over the place, blood flowing, weapons left and right, and both teams keeping up with each other for every measure and beat. If it had gone longer, we'd have a classic.
Both teams fight to a no-contest at 7:19 | ***

Cactus Jack vs. Sting [C] - Falls Count Anywhere - Beach Blast - June 20, 1992
This during a time when they didn't have much for Sting, so they wanted to feed him a string of bad-guys to keep him strong. Naturally, Mick went out there and did his absolute best to make it work and WCW did their absolute best to cut the nuts off of it by making it non-title. Regardless, this match is awesome, and not only one of Mick's best, one of the best of the early 90s. He made Sting look like a million bucks by bringing the insanity and Sting not only keeping up but bringing it himself. Great stuff. Too bad we didn't get to see the promo where Mick head-butts a wooden crate, sending his skull through it and crashing to the concrete. 
Sting hits Mick with a flying clothesline for the pin at 11:24 | ****1/4

“Macho Man” Randy Savage vs. Crush - Falls Count Anywhere - WMX - March 20, 1994
Bryan Adams has almost gone through as many transformations as Ed Leslie. Crush goes to blind Macho with a fist full of powder, but he slaps Crush's hands, causing him to blind himself. I think it would have been cooler had Macho been blinded, then recalled the time his sensei had him serve tea with a blind-fold, and then made the blind come-back, causing Crush to say metai. The match is fine, and more than acceptable for a mid-card match at WM. But for Macho's last WWE match? No. 
Macho ties up Crush's feet, making it so he can't make it back to the ring at 9:49 | **1/2

The Road Warriors vs. Sting & Booker T - Uncensored - March 24, 1996
Oh why oh why is this match on here? I'm not even kidding when I say I fell asleep twice during this match. This bout should have been 50-60 percent shorter, easy. They went a full half an hour in some of the most boring wrestling I've ever seen. If this was 10 minutes, and filled with actual brawling; tables, chairs, other non-domestic objects, then we'd probably have something. But at this point, we have washed up Road Warriors who even in their prime couldn't work a great match that was 10 minutes long, along with a bored Sting. I can't believe this was on the same card as the Doomsday Cage Match. This is the kind of PPV you'd ground your child over. 
Booker pins Hawk after Stevie Ray hits him with a chair at 29:34 | *

Nation of Domination vs. Ahmed Johnson vs. LOD - Chicago Street Fight - Wrestlemania 13 - March 23rd, 1997
Man, the original NOD was so weird. Ahmed should have pulled a Dusty and worn the make-up too. Animal executes about the worst piledriver I've ever seen to Faarooq, who later makes up for it by taking a body slam through a table, immediately earning props from me. Anyone who took a straight table spot before the current tables gets props, because those sharp, metal monitors always got popped in the air and came crashing down. D-Lo lays in some shots before he was even D-Lo. He’s looking a bit more like the original Otunga. They really went out there and had a great brawl. This was definitely a match that helped WM13 from being called the worst. 
Crush gets the original 3D, the Doomsday Device, and then a 2x4 shot for the pin at 10:45 | ***1/2


Stone Cold vs. Bret Hart - Street Fight - RAW - April, 1997
I was frothing at the mouth for this when it was live. At the age of 14, Stone Cold was a God to me, and I viewed Bret as a whiny little bitch. This is one of those deals that was not so much a match as it is an extended segment. It's still great, and led to Bret Hart - Evil Leader In A Wheel Chair, which was awesome. Stone Cold slaps on the Sharpshooter and refuses to let go for quite a while. Eventually he's wheeled back, and we get Owen in all his greatness. "WATCH HIS KNEE YOU IDIOT!" Of course, Stone Cold is driving the ambulance in one of the greatest moments in wrestling history. I remember jumping off the sofa and losing my mind with how overjoyed I was at all of this. You really need to see the entire night's worth of clips to appreciate this in full, with that said, the deal gets *****

DISC 2

Cactus Jack vs. HHH - Street Fight - Raw – September 22, 1997
Raw in 1997 really did have a lot of great moments and this is no exception, and arguably the best one. This isn’t just the match, this is also the awesome promo that first introduced Cactus Jack into the WWE after a 2-year hiatus. Not only is the promo great, but HHH seals the deal by reacting exactly as he should have; terrified. It’s a great brawl that you’d see thousands of times more, with a lot less talented people. It also has one of the sickest finishes I’ve ever seen to a match.
Cactus Jack piledrives HHH through the table for the win at 8:47 | ****

Taz [C] vs. Bam Bam Bigelow – Falls Count Anywhere Death Match – FTW Heavyweight Championship - ECW’s Heat Wave – August 2, 1998
The story here is that Bam Bam had been screwed over by the Triple Threat and needed help in getting revenge. He begged Taz for weeks, but Taz kept telling him to fuck off, until the day he came he told him that he wouldn’t be his partner, but his savior. Naturally, Bammer turned on him, and we were off and running. This was the return bout after their match from Living Dangerously where they fell through the ring. With this bout, it has its moments, as Bam Bam and Taz have chemistry while in the ring. Unfortunately, most of the match doesn’t take place in the ring. It’s interesting to note that Taz almost kills himself as he foolishly T-Bone Tazplexes Bam Bam into the audience from the entrance ramp, and while doing that he cracks his head on the guardrail. Divine intervention kept him from any serious injury though. Also, because Paul loved a good idea, he had them fall through the ramp this time.
Bam Bam taps out to the Tazmission at 13:21 | ***

Hardcore Holly vs. Al Snow – WWE Hardcore Title - St. Valentine Day’s Massacre – February 14, 1999
This match isn’t much, honestly, but I think it’s worth seeing at least once. They go all over the place, and even have a few cool spots, like the busting of tile on faces. It’s pretty cool to see the guys do battle down into the Mississippi River, as well as use the various things they find by the water bank.
Holly wraps Al into a roll of fence and gets the pin at 10:45 | **1/2


The Rock vs. Triple H – Strap Match - Fully Loaded – July 25, 1999

This isn’t a touch all corners style of match, it’s more of a dog collar sort of match. They’re stuck, and it’s go time. Honestly, the only thing that really stuck out for me was The Rock doing the camera spot, which I always dig, and the fact it took Hunter and two other folk to put The Rock down. 
Triple H hits the Pedigree for the pin at 19:04 | ***1/4


Test vs. Shane McMahon – For The Right To Date Stephanie - SummerSlam – August 22, 1999

I did a list of the greatest matches that kicked ass that had no right to, and this was number 1, baby. Test was unproven, and well, he was never proven, to be honest, but at this point we really knew nothing. And Shane McMahon? He’s the freaking son of Vince, no wrestler’s son has ever been shit, well, except Erik Watts and David Flair [back in 1999, that is]. Fantastic match that has everything from living room set-ups, mailboxes, and framed pictures being shattered over heads. Love it. We get a shot of Steph, pre-boob job, and it reminds me of what she said about them on Howard Stern. She said they looked like “melted packs of butter”. Man, I can’t think of a less-sexy way to describe boobies. Yikes. Anyway, it’s one hell of a match where they both gave their all, and thankfully this led to Steph being drugged and legally married to Hunter.
Test hits the pump-handle slam, then a flying elbow for the pin & the peak of his career at 12:04 | ***1/2


Big Show [C] vs. Kane – WWE Championship Match - Raw – December 20, 1999

During a very short time when they were making sure to justify Big Show’s contract. I gotta be honest, I was not looking forward to this match. However, these two went all out and delivered one hell of a hardcore match. They went all over the place and used quite a variety of weapons, great stuff. The angle here was that if Kane lost, Tori had to spend a weekend with X-Pac. Perhaps it’s just me, but I feel like my girlfriend spending a weekend with X-Pac is akin to her being thrown into the needle pit from Saw 2. Great finish too.
Big Show powerbombs Kane through the announce table and gets the pin at 6:47. Hopefully Tori had a Silkwood shower put in her apartment | ***1/2

Hardcore Holly [C] vs. The Headbangers – WWE Hardcore Championship - Smackdown – March 16, 2000
This was when Crash was defending the strap 24/7. At first, it was a really funny concept until it wore out its welcome. This takes place at Fun Time USA, and we go through slides, test-your-strength machines, and a ball pit. It’s very entertaining, and serves its purpose.
Crash escapes the onslaught after about 4 minutes | no rating


Shane McMahon vs. Vince McMahon – Street Fight - Raw – October 29, 2001

Review: Ugh, this match is terrible. A lot of people like their bout from WMX7, and I don’t even like that one. This is just slow, and a bad-example of a hardcore match that involves a lot of run-ins.
Angle hits Vince with a chair thankfully giving Shane the pin and ending this at 11:07 | 1/2*



Ric Flair vs. Vince McMahon – Street Fight - Royal Rumble – January 20, 2002
Man alive. Vince is absolutely huge. This match reminds me of one thing I truly miss, Lawler being a heel announcer and kissing Vince’s ass to no end. It’s fantastic. The match itself is pretty much what you expect. I read Flair’s book, and he says that he wasn’t nearly at the level of confidence that he should have been, thanks to WCW. So, if he had, we might have had a better match. There’s a cool spot where Flair hits Vince with the monitor, then demands they play it back so he can watch it. Very cool. I’d also like to say that Vince is one of the very few who does the Figure 4 right, as he puts the pressure on the injured leg.
Vince taps to the Figure-Four at 14:54 | ***

DISC 3

Shawn Michaels vs. Triple H - Unsanctioned Street Fight - Summerslam - August 25, 2002
I think it's great they call it unsanctioned, but if they're gonna do that, can't they at least not use an official ref? This match is one of my all-time favorites, and it gets better every time I see it. They were just having one of those nights where everything was executed perfectly. Absolutely text book on how to have a match, I believe. It's also one of those bouts where they have 5 stars about 3 quarters of the way through the match. 
Shawn gets a bridge pin at 27:20 | *****

Kevin Nash vs. Triple H [C] - Street Fight for the World Heavyweight Championship - Insurrextion - June 7, 2003
Flair and Shawn are in each other guy's respective corners. As the match starts Shawn ends up chasing Ric, so Ric blades. The focus is soon back on Triple H and Kevin Nash as they battle to the top of the ramp and tease the powerbomb spot from the Judgment Day PPV a month earlier. Back to the ring and they trade momentum and blade jobs for a while. Honestly, not a bad match. There were weapons, blood, and no slow spots. That's all I ask. 
Triple H hits Nash with the sledgehammer when he was trying to Jack-Knife Ric Flair at 16:33 | ***1/2

Mickie James vs. Melina [C] - Street Fight for the Women's Championship - RAW - March 5, 2007
Any time I falter on thinking Mickie James is the hottest of all time in wrestling, I need only see her. The match attempts to start in the ring, but Melina runs to the back with Mickie giving chase. They do battle in the Diva's lockeroom, giving us a few innovative spots such as Kelly Kelly using hairspray to thwart off an interfering Victoria and Melina whipping a towel off of Candice Michelle.
Match ends when Mickie seriously screws up a huricanrana, landing on her head and neck, allowing Melina to grab the pin at 4:27 | **


Triple H vs. Umaga - Street Fight - Cyber Sunday - October 28, 2007
They start off in the aisle, soon battling up to the entrance. They quickly add a star to the match by crashing through a wall. Anytime you want a star from me, crash through a wall. Triple H eventually breaks out trash-can, and as always I wonder if those are specially made for wrestling, or there are trash-cans that soft. Great table spot where Triple H is laid out on the third table in a row, with Umaga running along the other two and finally splashing Hunter through the last one. One of my favorite matches, as well as one of the reasons why 2007 was the year I returned to being a smark. 
Triple H hits Umaga with a sledge-hammer shot & Pedigree for the pin at 17:21 | ****1/4

John Cena vs. Umaga - Street Fight – Raw – June 16, 2008
Gotta love the 'he's too big' body slam spot. Something you don't nearly see enough of. This match is really average, and there isn't much to speak of except for the sweet moment when Cena goes to give Umaga the FU, but just can't keep him up, so they both fall with Umaga squishing John's head. Neat visual. 
Cena of course eventually does hit the FU, grabbing the pin at around 8 minutes | **1/2

DX vs. Legacy - Submissions Count Anywhere - Breaking Point - September 13, 2009
I'm sorry, but DX at this point were about as uncool as you could get. The bit with Shawn and Montreal is pretty funny though. For those wondering, when you venture into the crowd in Canda, it's not security, it's Securitie. Eventually they're brawling by the merch stands, while a crowd gathers and starts a soccer chant. I'm still unsure why Cody has the Triforce on his boots. Pretty sweet submission moment where Cody is threaded through a chair that's stood up, with Triple H applying a Boston Crab and Shawn a Camel Clutch. Brutal. Later, after Shawn takes a 10-foot dive from the seating section, Triple H and Legacy do battle in the back, with DiBiase taking a spine-buster through a concessions table. They eventually out-number Triple H, leaving him for dead, and then focus their remaining energy on the weakened Michaels. It's a pretty great match that made Legacy look strong as hell, far better than the Hell in a Cell match a month later. They made sure to go everywhere and really use the 'submissions anywhere' rule. Good stuff. It also made sure to fulfill the rule of If Shawn Wrestles In Montreal He MUST Submit. 
Shawn Michaels taps out while in the Figure 4 and Million Dollar Dream at  | ****

Rey Mysterio vs. Batista - Street Fight - Smackdown - December 11, 2009
A fan really let's Dave have it by holding up a BAD-tista sign. Snaps. Soon, Batista is whipping Rey with some camera chords, causing Stryker to say "those are wire and hardened plastic....rubber, I'm sorry". Who the hell was in his headphones saying "PLASTIC?! YOU WANT ME TO SEX YOUR WIFE AND BURN DOWN YOUR HOUSE?! IT'S RUBBER!"? A group of Rey Mysterio fans have their own signs in the form of 6, 1, 9. At the moment, the guy with the 1 isn't paying attention. Rey has only had 2 moments so far where the momentum has been on his side, but they've both been in pretty spectacular fashion. His second run ends ridiculously. You guys ever see that In Living Color skit where Jim Carrey is a karate instructor? He wants his students to try and stab him, so he instructs them on the way to come at someone with a knife? That's exactly what Rey did, as he ran at Batista with the chair in the air, only to catch a spear. Not a bad match, but really just a Main Event Squash. 
Batista levels Rey with a chair shot about 7 minutes in |  **1/2

Randy Orton vs. Cody Rhodes - Street Fight - Smackdown - November 4, 2011
Too bad Cody doesn't have the bags anymore, because someone has to cut out the holes, and they would have finally had something for Ryder to do. This match is showing how much better Cody was in this gimmick as opposed to Angry Heel #216, as he throws his bag handlers in Randy Orton's path. Speaking of Mr. Apex, am I the only one who thinks he has tanning bulbs in his car? The best part about this match is that it hasn't been the Randy Orton Show. Cody Rhodes has been more than capable of holding his own, and has had Randy's number on many occasions. Great stuff.
Randy hits the RKO and the pin at the 15 minute mark | ***3/4

Blu-ray Exclusives

Boiler Room Brawl
Mankind vs. Santa Claus
Raw - December 20, 1999

Street Fight
Triple H vs. Sheamus
Extreme Rules - April 25, 2010

Falls Count Anywhere Match
Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes
Extreme Rules - May 1, 2011

Street Fight
Randy Orton vs. Kane
SmackDown - July 22, 2011

Showcase Showdown: Falls Count Anywhere, Street Fights, Last Man Standing, all of those types of matches are my favorite. So when I heard they were going to release a set like this I figured it'd be an easy lock for an all-time favorite, along with Jericho's set, and the Hell in a Cell release. The first disc leaves a little to be desired, as these types of matches weren't very common before the late 90s. Once the second disc hits the set starts to really earn its money, while the third solidifies this as purchase worthy. There's honestly a million more matches out there that fit this description, should they go for a second volume; Mick's match against Van Hammer at the Clash, [although now it's on the new Mick set, so good deal] the long awaited to DVD Jericho vs Triple H - LMS, Regal vs Finaly - parking lot brawl from Nitro, Jericho & Shawn's brutal unsanctioned match, and hell, for historical sake, the FCA match between Khali & Cena, as it's Khali's only decent match. Ever. Bottom line, great set. 
4 & 1/4 Head-Butts out of 5

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- Caliber Winfield

Comments

  1. I'm guessing you meant CZW instead of CRZ in the first paragraph. Unless Christopher Robin ZImmerman has his own promotion or I'm oblivious to something. Otherwise, excellently done. That was a lot of work you did there, too.

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  2. Man, that Triple H v. Shawn Street Fight was incredible. Pretty much everyone assumed Shawn was going to hobble out there and be terrible, and he blew the doors off the place. Low expectations + exceeding them = Incredibly classic match. See also: Rock v. Hogan.

    Of course this worked against Vince V. Bret a few years back.

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  3. Caliber_Winfield_69420BoobiesJanuary 29, 2013 at 12:25 PM

    That's what I get for ad-libbing after my editor has looked it over.

    Thanks for the kind words, John, I appreciate it. Especially since if I recall you were one of my more harsher detractors.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Caliber_Winfield_69420BoobiesJanuary 29, 2013 at 12:30 PM

    Shawn & Triple H is great for another reason too, because you knew Shawn's back was actually once in very bad shape. So every time Triple H did a back breaker you cringed. I mean, HHH hit those back breakers HARD.

    It's flat out incredible how bad Bret vs Vince is. God was I let down...

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  5. I actually liked the Patterson/Slaughter brawl. The heat from the crowd was nuclear, IIRC, which really added to the match. and plus, blood. lots of blood.

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  6. and then it lasted for like...10 minutes. if it had been 4 or 5 it may have had some merit.


    poor Bret.

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  7. YankeesHoganTripleHFanJanuary 29, 2013 at 1:32 PM

    Jim Carrey was so freaken awesome on In Living Color.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Also, not to pile on, but "nitch" should be niche"

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  9. I don't agree with some of your more opinionated stances on things (that's life, I guess), but it's hard not to appreciate the work you did here. And from a selfish standpoint, I now have a guide on what parts to watch on Netflix as it's been sitting in my queue for a couple months now.

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  10. I too think HHH vs Shawn is ***** but I wish they saved the sledgehammer attack for the next night.

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  11. That could have been great. He could've come out and given the whole "well, maybe I still have it..." and talk about a comeback, though he has to make sure his back's fine and then HHH jumps him with the hammer.

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  12. Exactly. Shawn hashis glorious comeback moment unspoiled, HHH still gets the same amount of heel heat, maybe even a little more because HBK mentions how he's contemplating a comeback.

    ReplyDelete
  13. "I did a list of the greatest matches that kicked ass that had no right to, and this was number 1, baby."

    I'd be very interested in reading that list - I'm guessing the McMahons appear several times. Trish/Stephanie should probably be #2.

    Please post it.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Caliber_Winfield_69420BoobiesJanuary 29, 2013 at 6:45 PM

    Dammit. Alright, I'm never typing another word without you reading it first.

    ReplyDelete

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