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The SmarK Rant for WWE Royal Rumble 2013

The SmarK Rant for WWE Royal Rumble 2013

Live from Phoenix, AZ

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler and JBL

World title, Last Man Standing: Alberto Del Rio v. The Big Show

Bret Hart stops by to endorse ADR backstage, which has Ricardo giggling like a smitten schoolgirl. So now we’ve got the new Ric Flair and the new Bret Hart, apparently. Hopefully we won’t get the Tijuana Screwjob out of it. Show throws chops to start and tosses him around the ring, but Del Rio goes for the knee to bring him down. Show blocks the Si Kick, but Del Rio reverses a powerbomb into a rana and goes up with a senton to put Show down for 4. Show counters out of the armbar with a samoan drop, and that turns the tide. Show grabs a chair, but that goes badly for him when Del Rio gets it and beats him down with it. Show comes back with a chokeslam on the chair, and Del Rio is up at 9 off that before bailing to the floor. Show continues the attack, so Del Rio kicks him in the nuts for the 9 count. That’s not very PG. Show uses some pieces of the set for more punishment and gets the table, and they fight onto a suspended setpiece before Del Rio gets chucked through the table at an UGLY angle, a shoulder bump that bounces his head off the concrete. I’m shocked he didn’t break his neck there. That was horrifying. Alberto is up at 9, so I guess he’s OK, and they head back to the ring again so Show can set up for the finish. Del Rio wisely runs away from that, so Show throws stairs at him and beats the shit out of Ricardo as well. Show charges and goes through the timekeeper’s cubicle, and Del Rio just unloads with some nasty chairshots. I wish they’d retire the chair as a weapon sometimes. Del Rio stays on the arm with it and they head back in for the armbar, while Ricardo tapes Show’s feet to the bottom rope. That’s pretty smart. And with Show hogtied, the ref counts him down and out at 16:54. Damn good match, smart finish, although Del Rio still doesn’t feel like a top level babyface yet. ***3/4

Meanwhile, Dolph Ziggler chooses #1 in the Rumble, and Matt Striker angers AJ and gets chased off by Big E. He promises to unify the belts again at Wrestlemania, which is the first time anyone has brought up that possibility on TV. Hmm.

And now, ROYAL RUMBLE PROMOS! Old school, baby. All this was lacking was stylized graphics on a green screen behind the participants. And why the hell weren’t they doing these on the RAWs leading up to the show?

WWE tag titles: Kane & Daniel Bryan v. The Rhodes Scholars

Bryan escapes a wristlock and gets a sweet anklelock takeodown into a surfboard hold, and Kane comes in with a dropkick for two. Over to Sandow, and Kane drops an elbow on him for two, and it’s over to Bryan for the kicks. Kane cleans house on the heels and Bryan hits them with a FLYING GOAT VEGAN TOPE. Cheapshot from Cody turns the tide, however, and Bryan is your goatface-in-peril. Cody with a half-crab, but Bryan reverses into a small package for two. Sandow puts him down for the ELBOW OF DISDAIN for two. Bryan comes back with a leg lariat as the proceedings are kind of dull here for some reason. Cody cuts off the ring and Bryan comes back with a DDT and makes the hot tag to Kane. Sideslam gets two. Kane to the top and Sandow cuts him off and they mess up a neckbreaker spot to give Sandow two. Bryan makes a blind tag while Sandow suplexes Kane, and comes in with a missile dropkick off that. Chokeslam for Cody, No-Lock for Sandow finishes at 9:23. Really? Because it was WAAAAAAAAY past time to change those belts. Unless they’re switching them to the Shield next month, because otherwise I don’t really see the point. **1/4

Royal Rumble:

Huh, pretty early in the show for this. Dolph is of course #1, and #2 is CHRIS JERICHO?!? Good thinking to the guy with the Y2J sign in the crowd. Dolph tries to toss him, but Jericho goes up and hits a forearm, then clotheslines Ziggler to the apron. Dolph goes up and they fight on the top, allowing Jericho to hit a superplex as Cody Rhodes is #3. Jericho immediately lays into him with chops, but the heels team up and beat on Y2J. Jericho puts Cody in the Walls, however, prompting Ziggler to break it up. Kofi Kingston is #4 and he cleans house on the heels and renews hostilities with Ziggler. Everyone fights on the ropes, but no one out as Santino is #5. I guess his neck injury wasn’t as bad as feared. Santino thinks he’s eliminated everyone, but they all hang on and team up to get rid of him at 6:00. Drew McIntyre is #6 and he does fairly well for himself as Jericho gets tossed, but hangs on and pulls himself back in. Titus O’Neil is #7 and he beats on Kofi, but Jericho dropkicks Drew out at 9:28. Dolph continues to hang on. And GOLDUST is #8 and Cody is going nuts. We get the RHODES SLUGFEST and Goldust beats on Cody in the corner. David Otunga is #9 and he starts sucking immediately and Cole goes on a funny run with JBL about Rumble times among the announcers. The Rhodes Brothers team up on Titus, but then Cody turns on Goldust and can’t quite put him out. Why can’t Dusty’s hellspawn just get along?! Heath Slater is #10, and Cole calls him the Axl Rose of the group. If that were true, he would have showed up for the match four hours late and then left after three songs. The ring keeps piling up with deadwood which probably means that Ryback is near. What other purpose does Otunga serve? Sheamus is #11 and he hits everything that moves and gets rid of Titus and Otunga in succession at 16:12.

Tensai is #12. Yay. The crowd is immediately all over him with the Albert chants, and it’s another pileup of bodies in the corner. Brodus Clay is #13 and this is just begging for a Rikishi guest spot. Goldust backdrops Cody onto the apron, but he charges and gets pulled out there with him. Cody sends him into the post to put him out at 19:50 and the crowd is PISSED. Rey Mysterio returns at #14 with new gear and diminishing muscle tone, and he hits a pair of 619s and drops the dime on Jericho, but then it turns into another pileup again. Darren Young is #15 and everyone gets Brodus out at 22:00. Kofi puts Tensai out with a rana at 22:10. And then Dolph tosses Kofi, but he lands on Tensai’s back and moves to the table, but now he has to get back to the ring. This provides unique drama as he tries to puzzle it out, and uses JBL’s chair to pogo back to the ring with Bo Dallas at #16. That warrants another Slammy, and then he eliminates Darren Young on the way in at 24:40! Sadly, Cody kicks him out at 24:45 to end the run. And then GODFATHER is #17. Now these are the guys they should be doing nostalgia shots with. And then Dolph dropkicks him out again at 26:06. Oh well, still fun. Wade Barrett is #18 and he beats on some people. John Cena is #19 and all the heels line up against him and move in for the beatdown, but Cena RISES ABOVE MATH and tosses Slater at 29:11. Cody is gone at 29:15. Bo Dallas goes after Cena and that doesn’t seem like a smart move. Damian Sandow is #20, one guy too late to save his best friend. Frowny face. Avenge him, Damien! Rey nearly takes Barrett out with a rana, but gets tossed at 30:44. Jericho gets the Walls on Cena as Daniel Bryan is #21. Everyone gets kicked in the face as a result and that’s awesome.

Sheamus and Bryan try to get Jericho out again, but no go. Antonio Cesaro, still the US champion after the pre-show, is #22, and he slugs it out with Sheamus. And again, not much going on. Great Khali is #23 to waste a high number, and he can barely walk. Khali gets his chops in as JBL rails against Khali’s “interspecies relationship”. Kane is #24 and he can’t put Ziggler out either. Zack Ryder is #25, thus defying my prediction of a negative number for him. Khali goes out at 37:50, and Bryan eliminates Kane at 38:00. Bryan goes out by lands in a hug with Kane, who cruelly dumps Bryan on the floor instead of letting him continue. Randy Orton is #26 and this should clear out some people. Double draping DDT for Ziggler and Dallas. RKO for Ryder and he’s toast at 40:00. Team Europe beats on Orton in the continue to end that run, as Jinder Mahal is #27. I don’t see that one being the lucky number this year. Cena backdrops Cesaro out at 41:00 to draw more boos, and he slingshots Ziggler to the apron but not out. The Miz is #28 as Sheamus puts Mahal out at 42:42. There’s some impressive star power left in here. And Bo Dallas. Sin Cara returns at #29 to not much reaction. So that means Ryback has to be #30. And then Bo Dallas pulls Wade Barrett out at 44:32! Well there’s a RAW match tomorrow night. Miz backdrops Jericho to the apron as Wade pulls Dallas out in a show of sportsmanship at 45:22 and then knocks him out with the elbow. He learned that one from Hogan. And yeah, Ryback is #30 and he puts Sandow out at 46:32. Sin Cara dives and gets nothing, and Ryback presses him out at 46:55. Miz attacks Ryback and gets tossed at 47:06. Jericho hits the codebreaker to end that run, then Lionsaults Cena and almost gets rid of Sheamus. Codebreaker for Ziggler, but he hangs on and superkicks Jericho out at 47:52 after one hell of a run. Orton runs wild and hits Ziggler with the RKO, then Cena, then Sheamus, and the draping DDT on Ryback. Ryback blocks the RKO and clotheslines him out at 49:19.

Final four: Cena, Sheamus, Ziggler and Ryback. The Brogue Kick finally puts Ziggler out at 49:51 to draw groans from the crowd, but he didn’t need to win anyway. Going coast to coast was enough. Sheamus and Cena go after Ryback and there’s no good answer for a winner here. Sheamus and Cena stop to POINT AT THE SIGN and Cena hits Sheamus with the FIVE MOVES OF DOOM, but Ryback lays him out. Sheamus hits White Noise on Ryback and tries the kick, but Ryback dumps him at 52:29. So this leaves Ryback v. Cena and the crowd favorite is obvious here. More SIGN POINTING, although Ryback is a sign pointing virgin and kind of blows the spot. Spinebuster for Cena, but Cena takes him down with the STF. Ryback comes back with a Thesz Press, but Cena just dumps him to win at 55:01, because of course John Cena wins everything. Good thing he won that Rumble because who knows when he’d get another title shot otherwise. Great star power this year, but there was a lot of piled up bodies and the finish was particularly uninspired. They really need Pat Patterson booking these things again, because there were tons of missed chances for great spots and too much downtime. ***1/4

WWE title: CM Punk v. The Rock

I dunno man, the babyfaces have won every match tonight and it’s been all the obvious winners, so we might be ripe for a big swerve here. Although Rock’s cancer-stricken mom is in the audience watching tonight, so that’s probably not a good sign for Punk. Slugfest to start and Rock blasts out of the corner with the clothesline and puts Punk on the floor, and Rock’s already prepping the tables. Punk then UNPREPS the table, which is tremendous. They continue brawling on the floor while the crowd suddenly heels on Rock with a Punk chant, until Heyman goes after Rocky like a weasel to draw boos again. Punk continues his love-hate relationship with the poor Spanish announce table, and back in for a bodyscissors on the mat. Rock slugs back, so Punk puts him down with a knee for two. Punk wraps him up on the mat again and cuts off another Rock comeback attempt and goes to the ribs, then suplexes Rock onto the top rope for two. Heyman with another cheapshot and Punk adds a springboard dropkick and follows with a double axehandle to the floor, hurting his knee in the process. Back in, Rock goes to the knee, but Punk tosses him again and hits him with a suicide dive. Back in, Punk misses a flying clothesline and Rock goes to work on the knee and hits a legsweep for two. Go 2 Sleep time, but Rock reverses into the Sharpshooter, which Punk reverses into the Anaconda Vice. Rock rolls him over for two and follows with the DDT, but Punk reverses the Rock Bottom into a crucifix. Rock reverses that into the Scorpion King Deathlock, but Punk powers himself to the ropes. Rock puts him on the floor and once again preps the table, but the table collapses before they can do the awesome GTS-Rock Bottom reversal spot. I bet Vince fires that table after the show. THAT TABLE WILL NEVER GET INTO THE WWE HALL OF FAME! So Rock hits the Rock Bottom on the floor instead, which is just as good. Back in, Punk hits the high kick out of nowhere and both guys are out. Slugfest and the fans are still divided, but Rock makes the comeback with the spinebuster and People’s Elbow. And then the lights go out. Michael Cole accuses the Shield of powerbombing Rock through the table in the darkness, but WHERE’S THE PROOF?! I’d hardly call Michael Cole a reliable witness. In fact eyewitness testimony is notoriously unreliable, and Punk himself once again denies involvement with the Shield while dragging Rock back into the ring. And Punk RETAINS AT 21:35?!?!? But then Vince appears, ready to strip Punk of the title, but Rock doesn’t want to go out that way. So the match restarts and Punk hits the running knee and flying elbow for two. GTS is reversed to the spinebuster and People’s Elbow, and Rock wins the WWE title to end the 434 days of Punk. No complaints about the body of work here, as Rock worked hard for a guy who hasn’t wrestled since last April and they were throwing out bigtime finisher reversal spots to pump up the crowd. I love Punk, but I love Rock more and sadly one guy had to lose and it might as well be the one who can always win it back from Cena after Wrestlemania. ***1/2

The Pulse

If you were going into this expecting anything other than Cena winning the Rumble and Rock winning the title, you were setting yourself up for disappointment. Much like getting pregnant with a bastard child after a one night stand with Randy Orton, there’s nothing you can do to stop it so you might as well accept it.

Thumbs up, but yeah, I felt a certain tinge of disappointment at seeing the inevitable march to the Wrestlemania rematch that nobody really wants, too.

Comments

  1. So what the fuck happens to Punk now?

    An Undertaker feud would just bury him further



    Steve Austin probably is probably not healthy and really, would probably finish burying Punk in the ground if he was allowed near him


    Hope to God Triple H fucking decides to upstage Rock again, via an Iron Man match against Punk (complete with Punk winning) and ordering EVERYONE after the PPV, to only talk about HHH's match with Punk and treat Cena beating Rock like Benoit's very existence?



    And fuck, want to bet that the next two months are going to be nothing but nonstop burial of Rock by Cena and the announcers, complete with Rock being MIA from now until WM to hammer home Cena's bullshit desire to be seen as superior than Rock?

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  2. This is how fans SHOULD be reacting. It was clear for a long time that Rock was winning the WWE championship, I just wish it was done less shitty.


    I missed the Canucks-Sharks game though.....so FUCK.

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  3. Twice in a Lifetime!

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  4. Great review, although let me be the first to say that one of us mis-rated the Punk-Rock match (though ***1/2 is a really good rating and all): either my group of Punk fans over'ed or your side under'ed. Either way, had a blast watching this show. Lots of cool surprises, which is always a treat, and our bar literally popped and was chanting "Rocky" at the conclusion of the match.

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  5. So the Wrestlemania Opener is set: John Cena vs Alberto Del Rio for the World Heavyweight Championship. Should be okay.

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  6. "If you were going into this expecting anything other than Cena winning the Rumble and Rock winning the title, you were setting yourself up for disappointment. Much like getting pregnant with a bastard child after a one night stand with Randy Orton, there’s nothing you can do to stop it so you might as well accept it."


    Thank you! This PPV is what it is. Result is terrible, but not like we were expecting anything else. This Rumble didn't suck.

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  7. Here is my thing...I don't mind Punk losing, it's how he lost. Punk is a fictional character, and like any other fictional character, it sucks to see your favorites go out like a bitch. Even Raw matches have 17 finisher kick out spots, and this match doesn't even get one? And he goes out to an elbow drop? That is bullshit.

    Punk got treated like some flavor of the month heel who just got called up. In no other medium, would you "kill" off a character, or in this case, title reign like the way they just did. That epic title reign deserved an all out balls the wall title defense before finally falling to 3 Rock Bottoms or something.



    But because Vince didn't plan for him to have a 400 and whatever day reign, then he could care less. They always try to compare WWE to other forms of entertainment, but if that were true, Vince and Steph would be out on their asses years ago. The only reason they still exist is because wrestling compared to most entertainment, is easy. They fall ass backwards into money 95% of time.


    Basically, Punk just got Zack Ryder'd on a much bigger scale.

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  8. I would've stuck with the first fall and had Rock win it in the Chamber. Been saying it for 6 months: not looking forward to Cena/Rock II at all... only redeeming value would be the crowd shitting all over Cena winning the title.

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  9. Do you know how much WWE cares about Zack Ryder. He had the nasty, Taka Michinoku-like elimination of this years Rumble and it wasn't even replayed once. Not even for a morbid running joke for Jerry Lawler to run into the ground.

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  10. Yea I think the shitty finish is what soured me on the whole thing basically treating Punk as a joke and rendering the entire 400+ days reign pointless...and yes realizing that Wrestlemania is basically going to be a Cena strokefest greatly diminishes my my interest in the whole event.

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  11. I'm usually on the same page as Scott but no way on this one, Opener was meh and the Finish was a stupid chikenshit move, Tag match was nothing, Rumble was Boring, and Rock was the embarrassing second coming of Scott Steiner with how gassed he was with a Dusty finish too boot. absolutely abysmal show

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  12. All kidding aside, I kinda like that the World Heavyweight title match going on first has become a WM tradition.

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  13. HowmuchdoesthisguyweighJanuary 27, 2013 at 10:32 PM

    Punk will be fine and is essentially locked in as a main eventer. Nothing wrong with that, and nothing wrong with a match vs Taker Mania. Match wasn't great but it was solid with a good finish

    Jericho shocked me, that was great

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  14. I was expecting a kick out on the elbow for that very reason... then another GTS reversal into the rock bottom for the pin.

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  15. If there's any bright side to this, it's that it makes the Punk/Taker story an easy one for him to tell: a desperate Punk decides that the best way to regain the title that matters to him most -- Best In The World -- is to take something Vince can't strip away in The Streak.

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  16. Would have been better

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  17. Unfortunately, you've put more thought into what WWE will do with Punk than WWE has.

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  18. "but Cena RISES ABOVE MATH"


    I thought that was Scott Steiner's thing.

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  19. Any hope for either Heyman turning on Punk or Brock turning on Heyman & getting Punk/Lesnar at WM?

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  20. My problem with the PPV was it was only 4 matches and there were so many promos. There was one for raw tomorrow night. A backstage promo with hell no. A promo for the punk-rock and royal rumble. We could have been on a women's title match and the us title match on the ppv.

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  21. I really don't want to see them turn Punk face. There are few things more annoying the a guy switching between heel and face every few months.

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  22. HowmuchdoesthisguyweighJanuary 27, 2013 at 10:42 PM

    Very surprised there was no crazy counter sequence also.... Count me all pumped for Punk vs Taker but not overly excited about the 2 rematches (if HHH vs Lesnar remains a plan). But add a strong undercard and WM will be solid again

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  23. I don't remember Rock botching moves embarrassingly or throwing eight belly to belly suplexes out there.

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  24. And when he needed to be explosive before the false finish and the actual finish, he brought the goods.

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  25. "but Hardy RISES ABOVE METH"

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  26. We all knew Cena and Rock were going to win, Cena much more annoyingly in my opinion. Even though I love Rock and think Cena is great in the ring, there is no story worth telling with a rematch. Hogan didn't need Bruno to pass the torch to him in 1992 and Cena does not need it from the Rock, and I truly think they might hit 2.1 or lower post Mania...

    That being said my only hope is huge negative backlash gives us Punk vs. Cena vs. Rock which at least makes everything leading up to Cena FUing Rock and pinning him a lot more interesting.... And then we can get Brock-Taker and hopefully Hunter just sits this one out or hell let him ref Taker-Brock whatever...

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  27. My complaint about the finish is more about the fact that they pulled a Dusty finish. Punk pinned the Rock, then gets the match restarted.


    I have no problem with Punk losing to the People's Elbow, as PLENTY of people lost to that move, including Hulk Hogan.

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  28. I liked the Rumble well enough for what it was, although I am somewhat irked by the changing portrayal of the "Iron Man" in the Rumble. In the last few years, it seems that the Iron Man doesn't get to do anything more spectacular than last the longest, whereas in years past, the Iron Man would have a couple memorable spots, whether it was a few really cool elimination teases, clearing the ring (at which point, the big babyface enters as the next entrant), or just getting a noteworthy elimination here or there.


    Ziggler did better than last year's Iron Man (The Miz), but I guess I was hoping for a more athletic performance. It's kind of a bullshit criticism, but there it is. They probably do need Patterson booking these things again, since a guy like Ziggler would be perfect for Patterson's Rumble booking, particularly where the "Iron Man" role is concerned.

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  29. WWE expects the rumble to pay for itself. However, the truly great rumbles have a storyline within them and this one did not have any great storylines except for Ziggler going all the way to the final 4. There was some good ones like rhodes vs rhodes and how they did not want any help to fight the other. However, there were no major blood feuds like Savage-Roberts or Bret-Austin. There was also not a moment we would remember years from now like the punk speech, new nexus taking everyone out or maven-undertaker. They tried with Bo dallas-barrett and ryback-cena but those fell flat.

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  30. The show was alright. The main event felt important, but still, the show was just alright.

    Honestly, I'm far more excited about the return of CHIKARA in a week and a half.

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  31. "That just sounds like trying to justify why you marked out in a negative sense"



    I have no idea what that means.

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  32. What goods, He and Punk did NOTHING the Workrate was non existent--piece of shit match with an awful finish

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  33. Bo Dallas (born 1990) is the first Rumble entrant ever to be younger than the Royal Rumble event itself.

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  34. Rock is smart enough to hide some of his limitations, but he looked stupid out there sucking wind 5 minutes into the match

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  35. The only way they can salvage the WM main event is if they follow through with the poster and give us the star studded triple threat between Rock, Cena, and Brock.

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  36. I'm done watching for a while. I'm not doing the usual "I'll never be back" schtick, but I've got to take a break.

    I really have no desire to see Rock's masturbatory promo tomorrow be interrupted by John Cena pointing at the sign. And Punk demanding his rematch while Vince says he can have his rematch in Elimination Chamber.

    I wish Punk would have won strictly for the story-telling because that is after all what they do. Punk survives Rock at the Rumble. Then he survives Elimination Chamber.

    And the following Monday Punk says how that proves he deserves respect, blah, blah. And he's answered by the GONG. Title vs Streak at WM. Taker finally puts an end to Punk's reign of terror, but shakes his hand afterwards, giving Punk his respect.

    The next night have whoever wins a WM MitB match (Kofi? Barret?) can cash in on Taker and win the belt.

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  37. Marked out, as in, you suspended disbelief or were caught up/buying into things. And "in a negative sense," as in, doing so in more of an angry way. So, the bad kind of marking out as opposed to the good, happy kind.

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  38. It's not all about workrate dude.

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  39. I knew Rock was gonna win--It would have been a shitty finish if Punk won on a dusty finish too, didn't help the match was garbage

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  40. Is that even a thing? I've never even heard of someone doing that.

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  41. I can't fucking stand Ryder, so I really hope his prize is a one-way ticket to Orlando.

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  42. Your right, I LIKED Age in the Cage with HHH-and Undertaker, at least they were laying around for shit that looked devastating not some kicks th=o the gut and Rock with the worst Stomps one can muster

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  43. Agreed, Face Punk was basically tattoo'd John Cena. Keep him heel, he's a natural, and infinitely more fun.

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  44. Can I ask Why, His show was legitimately funny before WWE took over, and he's serviceable in the 10 minute match environment of the WWE

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  45. Anyone whoever busted a remote control or punched a hole in the wall after a Cena or HHH win would be in that camp. Anyone who wanted something to happen so badly that they became emotionally involved would be in that camp as well. I've been there. Just not tonight. I just felt disappointed and a little dejected by the Cena win.

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  46. I think they'll do that when it's revealed Brock attacked Rock in the dark, and not the Shield.

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  47. no one except the shield RISES ABOVE SETH

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  48. I can't up-vote this enough.

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  49. You are right, they didn't do anything exiting at all, no big finisher kick outs, no great work rate, the table broke and fucked up the only big spot, and they just kinda stood there in between spots where Rock had Shitty Offence

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  50. Punk needs to go away until SS.

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  51. To me, the biggest problem isn't that Punk shouldn't lose the title, or Rock shouldn't get it— it all comes down to the fact that all signs point to the company riding a face John Cena as the main attraction of their company coming out of Wrestlemania, because frankly I just can't imagine that working. Again, this is the equivalent of riding a post Wrestlemania 9 or so Hulk Hogan as the main attraction. There is zero upside to face Cena at this point, there is only audience attrition. Are they gonna run Cena through Cesaro, Sandow, Shield, Punk, Ziggler etc over the next 12 months? I'm guessing Vince thinks that the Rock loss/handshake finish is gonna catapult Cena into some new level of stardom, but it just isn't going to happen. If Cena hasn't become a mainstream "breakout beyond wrestling audiences" star by now, he never will. And for wrestling audiences who have seen this act at the top for going on 9 years now, the probability is that more will tune out rather than somehow get reenergized by a Cena face title run.

    I'm not arguing that the only right move here is to run a smark wet dream and make Punk or Bryan the face of the company. Hell, go with Sheamus or Ryback and I'd be perfectly happy. But to waste The Rock's big loss at Mania on Cena is just an awful move for the future of WWE, especially if they couple that with HHH and Taker winning the other top two matches on the show.

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  52. I actually think it will turn out Heyman is behind the sheild and Punk is unknowing of this.

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  53. Someone in the group I was with asked a really good question: what the hell did the Rock do to earn a title shot, anyway?

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  54. Cool! I also feel old. lol

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  55. I agree -- it's not really how he won that is the problem, but I disagree with it being a **** match. The psychology was ok, but I though Rock looked rusty and winded and neither guy really tried very hard. Too much laying around, too much weak offense, one big blown spot and a overbooked finish all hurt it more than the end result.

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  56. Really scott that ending didnt dissapoint you that a ppls elbow finished him off? U gotta remember against hhh punk kocked out of two pedigrees. Idk this finish made punk look really weak imho.

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  57. Yeah...Ziggler did shit tonight. Quite the contrast to Flair's '92 run.

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  58. I'm not mad in a emotional way like that. It's more like, and this is going to sound ridiculous, like I was let down. It's if Boromir died because he tripped on a rock and broke his neck instead of a bad ass with 15 arrows in him. I wouldn't have thrown popcorn at the screen, but I would have felt like I just wasted 2 and half hours(or in the case with Punk, 400 something days) of my life.

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  59. Agreed 1,000 over. And they had the chance to present Ryback as the heir apparent if they would have let him Shell Shock Cena and Sheamus and only get eliminated via Shield-ference but god forbid Cena not look like Superman....

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  60. Just because it wasn't that, doesn't mean it automatically sucks. It was a good match, just the wrong kind of match.

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  61. I think the idea in canon was, Rock's win over Cena got him into title contention ... once he got done with his day job, of course.

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  62. 1997- Vince tries everything he can to get the belt off Austin and on to Rock with, at best fleeting results

    2013- Vince only needs a mic and 5 minutes to get the belt off Punk and on to Rock...



    I guess he has been practicing

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  63. He supersedes WWE regulations, like the Wellness program.

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  64. Yeah personally I agree, even for a gimmicky WWF ME style brawl which generally speaking is not my favorite style, it was lacking in the good booking and excitement department.

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  65. I hear ya. I know my original comment mirrored some of what you had said, but it really wasn't directed at you (especially because you detailed your thinking in an intelligent manner already).

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  66. I said it in the live thread earlier, but I'll throw it up here too. On Raw tomorrow, if Punk shows proof it wasn't the Shield and gets the title back, it will be the most WWE thing ever.

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  67. "Meanwhile, Dolph Ziggler chooses #1 in the Rumble, and Matt Striker angers AJ and gets chased off by Big E. He promises to unify the belts again at Wrestlemania, which is the first time anyone has brought up that possibility on TV. Hmm."



    The scary thing is, this can still happen. Dolph still wants to be the one who does it, so he challenges Cena at EC to put the shot on the line. Cena makes Dolph put up his briefcase. Cena wins and cashes in after the World title EC match.


    As ridiculous as that sounds, I could totally see them going down that route.

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  68. Are you saying one does not simply chuck $12 popcorn?

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  69. Not without AND MY AXE!

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  70. what's done is done.


    Also all this stuff about Triple H vs. Brock.


    Hunter's going to look fucking ridiculous in a pair of wrestling trunks sporting that Duke Nukem haircut.

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  71. I wouldn't mind seeing that even if it Cena doing it.

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  72. Took a Rock Bottom on the floor and kicked out.

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  73. at least punk RISES ABOVE BETH

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  74. That's not it at all. I'm done because they've given me no reason to care.

    I have zero interest in Rock/Cena 2. I understand why it's happening, but it's not for me. The Twilight movies made a lot of money, too, and I understand why they made them, but they're not for me either.

    I've watched wrestling for 36 years, and I don't think I've ever been as apathetic about it as I am now. I like Dolph, Punk, Bryan, and Cesaro, and that's about it. It just kind of hit me that it's not worth it to me to sit through 2.5hrs of stuff I don't care about for the 30min I do.

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  75. I want to see the titles unified, so if it means the last ounce of Ziggler's credibility, so be it.

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  76. I suddenly hate Bo Dallas more than Cena now.

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  77. I'm even less enticed by Punk/Undertaker than the other two matches. All three of them have foregone conclusions, but Streak matches are simply "The Undertaker wins. Enjoy the ride."

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  78. Wrestlmania 9 is great analogy

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  79. The other thing is, they seem to be sacrificing the future with this Mania in favor of what they ASSUME are immediate dividends ( a massive Mania buyrate), when I'd wager that the buyrate on RematchMania is going to come in pretty disappointing. I can't imagine that it draws as nearly many buys as last year's show, or even the Mania 27 show that Rock simply hosted. And honestly, a lower buyrate than the last two years should be viewed as something of a disaster when you consider that they're adding Brock Lesnar (and his ginormous cost) to the mix. Even if you disregard "building for the future", I'd argue that they're leaving a lot of money of the table for this year's buyrate by going with Lesnar-HHH and Cena-Rock rather than using them in other ways. (Rock-Lesnar being the obvious match that would have drawn a much bigger number.)

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  80. Then, and only then, would it be a true Dusty Finish, as that requires the crowd to go home happy and then pull the rug out from under them the following night.

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  81. I'm actually rooting for it in a dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria kinda way.

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  82. In kayfabe he earned his shot after clearly beating Cena (first time since like 2008) in an impressive main event at wrestlemania. Just like Dana White gives out title shots after someone impresses him (latest receipient: Anthony Pettis), it would make sense that Vince would do it also. So Rock wins, Vince says "you can have a title shot!" and Rock chose Royal Rumble because he had movies to make.


    In reality because this PPV sold probably 600k buys and the only reason wrestling exists in the first place is to make money.

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  83. Too bad the Bushwhackers never ROSE ABOVE BAD BREATH




    Gah...I tried.

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  84. It was the "I'm done" followed by the "here's the way *I'd* do it" thing. I'm guilty as anyone of doing that at times (I don't know, seasons 6 through 8 of 24?) ;)

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  85. That Boromir Comparison is Aces

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  86. As it was happening, I was hoping the lights would come on and BROCK would be standing over Rock, but alas...

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  87. ...That is actually somewhat Genius, It be better if we weren't in this situation at all, but since we are that might be one of the best ways to polish a turd as much as possible

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  88. Will Rock holding the belt be enough to keep the casual fans who bought the last two years buying it again? Because they're really banking on the novelty of Rock as champion since this is essentially the third straight year that Mania has been sold on interaction between Rock and Cena. First the mere appearance of Rock. Then Rock wrestling Cena. Now this.


    I'm sure Mania will do very well, but I suspect it will slip some, as the allure of seeing Rock, and even the appeal of Rock v. Cena is diminished at this point. If you were going for names truly important to the non-fans and the casual fans then Rock v. Lesnar is far stronger in terms of recognition and interest than anything with John Cena could ever be. Rock v. Cena again is just another wrestling match. Cena is a wrestling star. Rock and Lesnar are stars. But then Rock and Lesnar are stars beyond the level that Vince can take credit for. Cena on the other hand has nothing beyond WWE, and owes everything he has to McMahon.


    Hence, we get another year of Cena v. Rock. For the first, er...second, maybe sort of kind of the third time.


    I'm not going to make any sort of "NEVER WATCHING AGAIN!" claims, but honestly, unless they come up with an awesome undercard, I really don't know that I need to spend $65 to watch Cena/Rock and HHH/Lesnar.

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  89. Again, not saying Rock winning the title is necessarily the problem. But using Rock to put over a face Cena is just a bad business move at this point in Cena's career. Rock as the champion is the mainstream draw for Mania— not Rock vs Cena. Rock is the reason that the non-hardcores will buy that show, so if they give Rock a compelling storyline it wouldn't make a huge difference who he's facing, within reason. So why not pair Rock against a younger star with more upside (Bryan, Ziggler, Sheamus, Ryback) which gives them the exact same draw, but instead with a chance to make a new star who can hopefully create an upswing in business post-Mania? I mean, if WWE really just wants to reach mainstream audiences and pop a single massive buyrate, they'd be better off pairing Rock off against Lesnar or even HHH or Undertaker rather than Cena. All of those guys, Lesnar especially, have more name value with everyday people than John Cena does.

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  90. Which is hilarious seeing as how Cena vs JOHNY ACE got a main event over a title match

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  91. Hopefully it means more dates.

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  92. Any chance one of em was hurt and they had to go home quicker than planned?

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  93. That's crazy if it's accurate

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  94. Cena maybe because well, they're going to feud and all and he has to keep up with Rock's track record of burying people during comebacks, but the announcers? Fuck no. It's going to be non-stop kissing of Rock's ass and saying how he's the greatest of all time now that he beat Punk and has the title back. Hell, they were doing this before his match with Cena, now it's going to be amped up even more. But I'm sure you're pretty cool with that since it's not Cena.

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  95. Jerry Lawler RISES ABOVE DEATH!

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  96. This exactly. This isn't the second, but THIRD time in a row that Rock-Cena will basically main event Wrestlemania. Unless somebody turns heel, we're getting the exact same build we've gotten the past two years. No feud in WWE history has ever done this— not Hogan-Andre, not Rock-Austin or Rock-HHH or lots of other ones that were exceedingly hotter and better built than this one.


    I really think this could be a situation in which the deaf ear they hold to their fanbase might come back to bite them, in the form of a lower than expected buyrate and a main event that gets the Lesnar-Goldberg treatment from the live crowd.

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  97. I bet punk thought about kicking out of that peoples elbow...

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  98. Everything is pointless, if you carry things to their logical conclusion.

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  99. I think Adam is one of those "I only care about what happens from bell to bell" kinda guys.

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  100. The match was a bit of a disppointment, as crazy as it sounds, I thought Cena carried Rock to a better match.

    Promo's and buildup were much better for Rock/Punk than Rock/Cena but Rock/Cena had better chemistry in the ring. Rock was definitely blown up at times, I was having Ultimate Warrior flashbacks,lol.

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  101. Show ended about on time so seems unlikely. Rock looked a bit gassed though.

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  102. I get that somewhat, but even bell to bell Ryder isn't terrible--he's way better then Otunga, or Khali or any of the true stiffs

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  103. Maybe Rock was too tired to get him up for a Rock Bottom,lol. Could be truth.

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  104. Im not a Ryder fan per se but I give him props for trying to get over on his own. WWE made sure to kill him dead in every way possible. They are quite dumb sometimes.

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  105. There was ZERO reason not to give Ryder a real shot and let him succeed or fail on his merits

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  106. Still the hype was nuts for this match, n it didnt deliver.

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  107. Understatement of the year

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  108. Outside of Y2J, I dont think anybody on the show was as over as Goldust. Id pay money to see a BookDust/Hell No feud. It would even bigger than Road Warriors/Demolition, lol.

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  109. Indeed x100. If Rock winning the title was for the purpose of making Ryback at Mania, then that makes total sense. Take the biggest star you have, and have him put over someone new. But where is the benefit of putting Cena over huge at this stage in his career? Again, his popularity has reached its height.


    The only way this wrks is a Cena heel turn in which he becomes leader of The Shield. Obviously there's no way that's happening, but to me that's the only result in which Cena can help them GAIN new fans. Face Cena as champ is a plateau at best, and steady decline more likely.

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  110. The crowd reaction was proof that People would be into a Cody Goldust feud

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  111. They let Cena suck his heat away and made him look like a chump with one of my all time favorite segments(the flat tire,lol) and Eve's turn. If anything, Ryder was in the role where he was suppose to get his revenge, how the writers couldn't comprehend this, is beyond me.

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  112. Rock should be tapping to a Yes/No Lock...

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  113. It was a Royal Rumble pop.

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  114. That Ryder angle is actually why I stopped watching Raw, have only seen a Handfull since and none since Lawler's heart attack

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  115. Not Goldusts pop per se, but there was a real tension and reaction to the brothers

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  116. Sorry Scott, but I have to disagree, this PPV was fucking garbage.

    ADR/Show: Bored the shit out of me. Too slow, too many contrived spots that Heyman would have said "no" to while he was booking ECW, and a shit finish. Shit match, IMO.

    Hell No/Scholars: Match itself was decent, but really, I'm beyond fucking sick and tired of this feud. Rhodes and Sandow should have gone over here, Hell No has run its course and it's time to move everyone on to something else.

    The Rumble: I can't remember if it was flairforthegold or nw88 that said (and I'm not going trough 1800 comments to see who it was) that a match that you'd never watch again doesn't deserve higher than ***, which is what I scored it in the live thread. No shit. After Jericho came out the whole match was forgettable. Goldust and the Godfather instead of Benjamin or Carlito or Morrison? Cena wins, instead of Orton (as much as I hate him, he should have won) or Ziggler, or Ryabck, shit, even Sheamus again? Fuck you, Vince.

    Rock/Punk: Fuck you, Vince. Rock should have kicked out of the GTS and Punk should have jobbed clean to the Rock Bottom, Cena can find his own way to the automatic WM main event. That shit with "The Shield" (we all know that the fact that fuckhead Cole was saying it was them means it wasn't) and Vince was uncalled for. Total bullshit, and a worse "fuck you" to the fans than the 18 second job last year. I hope there's a fucking blizzard for WMXXIX.

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  117. It was the novelty of it. No one wants to see Goldust wrestle at WM.

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  118. I dont think Rock would have an issue making a new star, he knows the way the business works but WWE wants a torch passing moment. I just dont think the fans are going to be happy with Cena winning to close WM.

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  119. There you are Adam, I figured you'd chime in eventually

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  120. woah, who said WM, again, 3 hours of Raw to kill, a February PPV in need of some undercard

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  121. Can't agree with this at all.

    Look, does WWE want Punk to be one of the big boys or not? They give him this huge reign which means something, but when it comes time to put him on par with the Rock, something that the Rock did with his promo work, it was time to make him look like a chump. Not only does he get dusty finished, but within 5 minutes of the re-start, he gets put out by a spine buster and a People's elbow. That's weak. That's weak and it sends the clear message that it doesn't matter how many title reigns Punk has, no matter how long they last, whatever, the real grownups either wrestled during Attitude Era, or are named John Cena.

    I'm not blind, I know Punk is pushing the basement of how large you have to be in order for Vince to take you seriously, but they ended a historical reign, in such a disappointing fashion. I know Punk is considered a major player backstage, I know Vince considers him an asset, but tonight they undercut Punk when they had a chance to add some dimension to his character. Remember the Rock vs HHH ironman match, where HHH sent his posse to the back and said "This is my fight." Punk could have had that moment tonight, or something analogous. Maybe have someone reach out and tell him you don't need the Shield, you're a great wrestler etc etc, and at least give Punk some element of tragedy to his decision. But no, we get Cowardly heel gets what's coming angle number 3,456.

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  122. Everything. He's terrible in the ring, terrible on the mic... he's an ever more shitty version of the Miz.

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  123. On tomorrow's Raw? Fine, whatever. But no one is paying money to see that match.

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  124. Exactly, losing clean would have been BETTER for Punk, cause at least it's a memorable battle where he just came up short

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  125. It was actually the Shield that attacked, a fan managed to snap a photo that got Dean Ambrose perfectly.


    Also, once again, both Triple H and Hulk Hogan got beat with a People's Elbow.

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  126. Shitty on the mic? He gets his character over perfectly. Great mic work isn't just about cutting 20 minute monologues.

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  127. I think if they did the match in an arena it would be much easier to hear the fans disdain for Cena, in an open air stadium it wont sound as bad.



    Speaking of HHH, I think peeps would even rather he beat the Rock for the title at WM rather than Cena. That's pretty scary,lol.

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  128. Well even in a "legit" sport like boxing, title shots are awarded because of public interest. At least the big name titles. Like aren't fights booked simply because enough people want it?

    It's not like WWE ever had a ranking w-L system or anything.

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  129. A relativity deep character that evolved from Jersey Shore esq, to bonifide giant wrestling nerd whose just living his dream no less!!!

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  130. Id have no problem with a Cody/Goldust retirement stip match at WM or a Book Dust/Hell No bout. Goldust still is a better worker than half the damn roster.

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  131. Losing to the elbow is fine, but this match should have been a cakewalk to book, If ever it was time for a finisher fest THIS WAS IT. It took 3 pedigrees and a Jacknife power bomb to beat Punk when he fought HHH, here it took One Elbow and a Rock Bottom, WAY earlier in the match--and Punk never even hit the GTS

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  132. Now on the flipside, I'd enjoy that--and unless they have plans for Cody it gives him something to do

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  133. But Cena would want Rock to win the title, how does that make sense?

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  134. I'm on your side, man. This is bullshit... someone explain to me why I should keep watching WWE.

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  135. That flashbulb that popped right in Ambrose's face kind of makes that a hard proposition. Unless Brad Maddox takes the blame and they alter the footage to make it look like Maddox. He's already trying to get Paul Heyman to like him, so this would make sense.

    I actually thought we would have it the other way, Punk would keep the title, and then Rock would protest the decision. Cena would open up Raw showing the footage (because Cena has to be involved some way), and then Rock would have to win his way back to Wrestlemania, like he did against the Big Show in 2000 when they eliminated each other from the Rumble.

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  136. Don't buy WM. Anybody that is pissed about the direction should stream the shit out of that ppv. It's the only way WWE will listen.

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  137. Rock looked pretty gassed out there, maybe he couldn't give him the Rock Bottom at that point, maybe Punk told him not to. Who knows?

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  138. That is ridiculous.

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  139. If he could handle a Spinbuster he could handle a Rock Bottom, Punk does most of the work in a Rock Bottom

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  140. Before the world title match, Del Rio told Bret Hart that that was the best passing-the-torch promo he'd ever seen and that Bret deserved to be world champion.

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  141. TheRealCitizenSnipsJanuary 28, 2013 at 12:18 AM

    In Soviet WWE, sign points to you

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  142. They could have even done something where Rock tries to shake Punk's hand, but Punk walks away because his pride won't let him. So you have what you wanted (a Rock win) without making Punk look like a chump, and a good character moment where Punk shows that he's still flawed.

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  143. Usually I join in thees but I got nothing

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  144. You know what could have been a really interesting Mania main event? Punk vs Cena for the title.


    As many times as they've wrestled eachother on PPV, the fact is that they're the modern equivalent of Rock-Austin and really should get the Mania spotlight at least once, and this would have been the perfect time to do it. Running Cena-Punk and Rock-Lesnar would have equaled more buys than Cena-Rock (because Rock-Lesnar is the biggest mainstream match they could possibly do), and Punk-Cena on top for the title would have drawn nuclear heat in NYC. And even if the end result is the same (Cena wins the title), you get there in an exceedingly more interesting way and with a much better match. And then job Rock to Cena at Summerslam to pop a huge buyrate there.

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  145. Maybe,Im reaching,lol. Rock didnt even try his kip up thingy so who the heck really knows. I dont think Punk comes off looking weak though.

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  146. He certainly didn't look strong

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  147. Good memory, it was me. I pretty much agree with your assessment too. The overriding feeling I have from the show was a lack of energy and enthusiasm, in the work and in the booking. Rock and Punk should have been a hugely epic and well booked match given the build, but it's like they both realized the only part of it that will make any highlight reel is Rock standing with the belt, so they didn't bother to make it anything special. That's really a dangerous precedent to set too with a part timer like Rock who people expect awesome from every time at bat. Maybe it's just what Princess said -- just a clash of styles.

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  148. I know it wouldve been a bullshit finish but I think Vince taking the title off of him wouldve worked better for Punk and the character he portrays.

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  149. Sorry, but me and Screamwork do it better.

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  150. He does. Make all the statutory rape jokes you want, but I can't think of anyone else that had a heart attack on live TV and came back to suck dick on commentary 8 weeks later.


    And yes, I know this was a joke thread, but still...

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  151. I mean, maybe for the show they just used the Shield, but maybe storyline wise they'll use, say Brock, since they didn't want to waste a date by having him do a run in while it's pitch black.

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  152. One thing that REALLY bothered me:

    "You don't take it from him, I am."



    Come on Rock, you're better than that.

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  153. For a half-second, I thought they'd do something interesting. Then Rock won.

    *Sets watch*

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  154. I streamed this PPV, and I'm glad I did. That Dusty finish reminded me why, and fuck that shit with Cena winning the Rumble. They could have had me win it and still got to the same matches at WM, but they decided to say fuck you to the fans.


    Would still rather watch every second of WWE for the rest of my life than ever watch 1 second of TNA again, if I had a gun to my head and had to choose between the 2. Just wanted to throw that out there.

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  155. Well, just Cole screaming "IT"S THE SHIELD!!!!" makes me think it wasn't them...

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  156. Sadly, the way that match was booked confirms this wasn't meant to be an epic reign or opportunity to torch pass. Punk got to hold the title for so long because someone had to keep it warm for the movie star. I feel so disillusioned.

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  157. What if the Rock beats Cena at Wrestlemania and turns heel...

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  158. Just another example of why they should have booked a straight finish.

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  159. So you don't like the character. But he has that character down perfect.

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  160. I want to see it happen as well. Let's face it, the Smackdown belt has ZERO purpose anymore. The belt's been useless ever since Jack Swagger had it since it's past overdue to unify it with the one world title that has credibility.

    While they're at it, WWE should strike a deal with the NWA to get rid of their pathetic excuse of a "World" Heavyweight Title although I highly doubt that John Cena vs. Tokyo Monster Kahagas would even draw a rating for the Wednesday night ION show let alone a PPV buyrate.

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  161. Brock, standing with one foot on Rocks chest, staring at Punk while grasping the wwe title in one hand. The other hand is pointing at the mania sign.

    Doesn't make sense, but it would look damn cool.

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  162. I actually had both title matches at **** and the Tag match at ***. I'd definitely put the Rumble at ***1/4. It had its moments, but it dragged because they just had to make the Most Overrated Wrestler the runner-up. I'm tempted to drop the main event below **** because that finish was awful, but the match up until that point was pretty good and I guess it doesn't offend me as much because I'm not a fan of this version of Punk (which comes across to me as Punk pretending to be Austin Aries instead of actually being CM Punk, which he was great at). It may be that I had very low expectations going into this show (I watched some of the buildup on Raw and it made me much less interested in the show), but I thought this was the 2nd best WWE PPV since MITB '11 (but I've considered most WWE PPVs pretty bad over that time span). None of the matches were bad and I had 2 out of 4 at ****, so that's a pretty good show.

    Bret Hart endorsing ADR was a great moment. ADR is definitely Bret Hart-like as a face, just as he resembles JBL when he's a heel. He's just great at any role they put him into. I'm absolutely stunned that I gave a Big Show match 4 stars, but he's improved as a worker enough recently that ADR can carry him. It also looks like the real Chris Jericho is back. He looked much better tonight than he did in his last run.

    The only acceptable outcome of the Wrestlemania main event is John Cena turning heel. If WWE puts Cena over, as a face, and tries to ride him once again, the result will be even worse than the last few times they've done that. The little kids that cheered for Cena in 2005 are now teenagers and there is no way they're going to want to cheer for the same old crap in 2013. Hulkamania didn't work at this point in Hogan's career and he was a much bigger star and had much broader appeal than Cena ever did. If Vince hasn't learned from the mistake he made in 1993 and the mistake Eric Bischoff made from 1994-mid 1996, things are going to get really ugly for WWE next fall. The kids don't want their Hulk Hogan anymore. They want their Hollywood Hogan now.

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  163. Me too. Although I doubt he'll ever have a surprise appearance given his contract and everything, I've been hoping for him to bail out Punk since Hell in a Cell.

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  164. Nah, it's not just that. You seem, at least to me, to be describing how I feel about the Miz (I want to punch you in the face!), not Raider (just go away...). But either way, they're both awful in the ring and on the mic.

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  165. I find it hilarious how many people are "done" with WWE tonight. A blind man could see where this was heading since the day Rock announced he wanted the WWE title and it went down exactly as most predicted.


    Im not sure why tonight has people "done", did you really think Punk was going to retain or that Cena wasnt going to overcome the odds, and get yet another main event spot?

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  166. Not the results that put me off, it was the shitty matches and finishes, seriously, Every finish, regardless of who one was Unmemorable or actively stupid

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  167. I don't understand it because I mostly stopped caring about the outcomes of WWE matches when they put Cena over Lesnar last year. I expect horrible booking out of WWE and I expect Raw to be excruciatingly boring and filled with unfunny "comedy" segments. It surprises me these days when WWE isn't horrible and doesn't do something extremely stupid. But, I don't have a problem with Rock VS Cena II, provided they don't try to put John Cena over Rock without turning him heel. If they do the stupid thing everybody expects, I'll be laughing at them for being that stupid.

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  168. I remember turning against Cena around the time he moved to Raw and I assume that's probably the way it was for most of the online fans. He was great in 2003.

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  169. They acknowledge the dueling Cena chants on air, they have to know that he isn't going to get a good reception at WM if he wins.



    I dont have a problem with Cena the person, seems like a pretty decent guy, but as a wrestler, he is too damn corny to be the face of the company. He always gives a pretty decent match but the promo's and the goofy selling of what should be serious stuff just puts anybody over the age of 10 off.

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  170. That "any match that you wouldn't watch again doesn't deserve ***" quote is something I'll carry for life, and something I wish other people that review matches would adopt. Not just 1, but TWO of the clowns at 411 gave the Hardy/Cole match at Final Battle ***1/2. But we're not here to talk about that horseshit...

    I didn't expect anything epic from Rock/Punk, they match they put on was fine with me...until they did the stupid lights out bullshit and brought Vince out. They could have done a nice, clean, hard-fought finish that would have both of them look good. But instead they did a finish that made both Rock and Punk look terrible, and did it on a shit show.



    I'll say one thing though, if WWE starts doing the Twatter scroll like ESPN shows the NBA scores, you won't see me on Monday. Fuck me, I can't do that CHIKARA shit, there's some other indy show I can review, right? Right?

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  171. Congrats to Parallax and TraitorAlex on being the only two commentators in the prediction thread to correctly guess the Final Four in the Rumble.


    I had 3 of the final 4 right (got fucked over by no Shield, which was stupid on my part to begin with since I had Sheamus as #30 so I should've thought he would've been in the F4 as well, but I erred on the side of 2:2 faces:heels).

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  172. Bo Dallas is the next COMPANY GUY.. So get ready for plenty of Bo whether we like it or not.

    Pretty much everyone on the Internet hates him, apparently WWE loves him, and from what I've seen (which isn't much at all so I'm probably off here) his matches just seem to be him getting his ass kicked and then BO SPEAR BO WINS! He's the next John Cena.

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  173. Breaking news: WWE Superstar Is Upset Over WHC Finish

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qlJUDenTHo

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  174. brb, editing my Rumble prediction post.

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  175. A Wrestlemania with Punk-Cena and Rock-Lesnar and Summerslam with Punk-Lesnar and Rock-Cena.


    For fuck's sake Vince.

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  176. ur about 2 degrees to close.

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  177. "someone explain to me why I should keep watching WWE"


    In 2 months, you'll see 80,000 people shit on an entire PPV. And possibly a blizzard....

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  178. Here's a scary thought: what if this is leading us toward Punk v. Vince?

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  179. Here's a scary thought: Punk vs Vince a few months ago was better than Rock/Punk tonight.

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  180. This was the first live PPV I've watched on TV in at least 5 years (I witnessed Summer Slam 2011 in person), and I thought it was a good show. They had me going, thinking that Punk retained the title until the Dusty finish.


    I'm drunk as I type this.

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  181. Also, as my cat Gizmo watches me type this, I thought that this was the BEST Sharpshooter ever applied by the Rock. I mean, it almost looked legit. He sat back on it and er'rythang. Almost a great match, although Vince kinda ruined it.

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  182. if you're gonna use that apostrophe, omit the e before the d.

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  183. applying the Rock Bottom is F'n easy. My 115 lb., 23-year old brother can give me one, and I weight 217 lbs. Just sayin :-/

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  184. I could see Punk/Vince at EC and then set up Punk/HHH, since you know HHH will want to DESTROY Rock/Cena and basically render it an afterthought. He'll have a better shot doing so if he has Punk as his dance partner than Brock, PLUS he'll have the option to let Punk beat him, ensuring that their match becomes a modern classic in terms of HHH "making" Punk and giving Punk the boost needed to overcome Cena's political machinations to make Rock kneel before him and hand him over the world title......

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  185. SuperCena vs. Invincible Rock

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  186. This is the first time that either John Cena or The Rock have faced the same opponent in consecutive Wrestlemanias. So it's fresh in at least one contrived manner.

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  187. I know it's not going to happen, but I would just love the crowd completely turning on the match (a good time for a "you both suck!" chant).

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  188. Because it's Wrestlemania. You'll watch. Then bitch about it. It's just your nature.

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  189. Saw a pic of Roman Reign's tattoo from the attack, it was them.

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  190. but the Shield didn't decimate The Rock. Just wait...

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