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Monday Night Open Mic

I had so much to write on last night but I can't really do it posting from this Android. Basically the WWE  is just in a bad place right now creatively. This might be the time to start throwing shit against the wall and seeing what sticks. So enjoy the show and beat the hell out of each other.

Comments

  1. This week: Hall of Famer Bob Backlund teaches Daniel Bryan the Cross-Face Chicken Wing so he can eliminate the Miz and his terrible Figure-Four.

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  2. So will this be a "Sean Waltman" post-WM RAW or an "Umaga" post-WM RAW?

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  3. Why throw shit at the wall when you can retire to the safety of your bathroom, lay toilet paper around the toilet seat and in the toilet itself, so as not to get your legs cold/have poop splash toilet water into your bum hole

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  4. Please allow me to be your indulgence for a moment:
    http://www.wrestlenewz.com/wrestling/exclusive-articles/wm-29-missed-shots/



    As for the annual return, I'm hoping for Batista. It'll probably just be Christian (whom I like, but it isn't really a "return"), but I've got my fingers crossed for Big Dave.

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  5. FINALLY I DON'T HAVE TO KEEP IT CLEAN!!!!! HEY FLAIR4DAGOLD, YOU'RE A CUNT!

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  6. Is this slagging on X-Pac? Because that was one top 10 moments ever on Raw.

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  7. You can't say that to him, you poopheaded stupidface!

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  8. AND YOU PETUKA! YOU'RE TOO FUCKING....NICE! HA! TAKE THAT!

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  9. Absolutely not. A Waltman RAW is the "good" example.

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  10. Oh. I wasn't watching when Ohh-Mang-Ah! debuted.

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  11. Your appearance is comical to me.

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  12. Finally The Rock Has ......Gotten The Hell Out of Dodge!!

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  13. I loved the way Regal would say Umaga

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  14. It was ridiculous. Flair was cutting a promo, Armanda Allejawhatever Estrada came out and said there was about to be a moment that would have people talking around the watercooler the next day. What we got was a painted-up Jamal that beat up an old man and no one talked about it at the watercooler the next day.

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  15. I'm hoping Vince trolls everyone and has Cena come out to Rock's music to start the show.

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  16. WWE booking on the fly tonight. Hoo-boy.

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  17. I am pretty excited for the show tonight, more so than Mania last night. No idea why. All these Rock reports, plus potential returns, and a potentially angry group of Jersey fans seems like a recipe for fun.

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  18. Heyman's gonna be on FIRE tonight

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  19. FINALLY we don't have to keep it clean!

    Everyone... GET THE FUJ!!!

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  20. It seems ripe for a spontaneous long great match. If they are really in chaos coming up with a new show how hard is hey Daniel Bryan and Dolph Ziggler go out there and kick ass for 20 minutes.

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  21. Aka every Monday night ever.

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  22. They should use the ROH standby if someone doesn't show up in the New York area: replace him with Xavier.


    I'm sure he's available.

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  23. Why not? WWE already stole their iPPV set up.

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  24. I hope. Or we just get 25 minutes of a Cena promo.

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  25. Hmm... I, like many others, presumed we would be getting The Fuj in order to beat him up, but I want no part of what Curry and Zanadude are doing right now.

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  26. It will be a "we don't care how much you want Daniel Bryan" RAW.

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  27. Getting in the mood with some good old school wrestling.


    The man who once broke Andre's leg beating on Foley's (not) LEGENDARY trainer, and Vince's own GI Joe vs. Vince's own Brokeback Mountain, from 1981.


    If Raw sucks, at least I saw SOME good wrestling tonight.

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  28. HOW THE OPENING OF RAW IS GONNA HAPPEN TONIGHT:

    JOHN CENA: ROCK, YOU LOOK LIKE YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY.

    THE ROCK: YES, I MOST CERTAINLY DO! I HAVE TO GO NOW. MY PLANET NEEDS ME.

    https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/s480x480/536940_599523383410802_155877180_n.jpg

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  29. ATLANTIC CITY ROULETTE FTW!

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  30. Cena won. Why? Because fuck you IWC that's why!

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  31. ...not that there's anything wrong with that.


    ...allegedly.

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  32. Does that lower cased URL count as breaking gimmick?

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  33. (Mills Lane: ON)


    Hmmm... I'll allow it!

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  34. COME AT ME, BRO. I'LL BREAK YOUR STUPID FACE OFF

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  35. If Vince has figured out a way to clear 200 million a year by annoying the internet then he deserves a statue.

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  36. Rock Tweet:Dwayne Johnson
    ‏@TheRock
    2m
    In the middle of last nights
    Wrestlemania match I tore my abdomen & adductor muscles off the
    bone. Just part of the job. But as we know..

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  37. YEAH LETS ALL FORM A MOB AND GO AFTER THE BLACK GUY!

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  38. lol i see youre on caps dick lately. hows does it taste like?

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  39. PS I lost my smile.

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  40. I'M SURE HIS WHORE MOM TOLD HIM BEFORE HE EVER TRIED IT

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  41. Probably from sucking so much wind.


    In all seriousness, ouch, that's gotta hurt.

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  42. Stolen from 411 comments

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  43. Why Are Steroids Bad?
    By: Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson

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  44. I have no idea how serious that injury is. But I'll add at no point would I have suspected he got hurt last night.

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  45. What could happen? Lesnar! Punk! Rock vanishing! Naw it will be Cena smirking with bad jokes..

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  46. Don't bring your hate crimes here! HATE CRIIIIIIME!!!

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  47. Whitey T in this. . .

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  48. Oh how dare you say it!

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  49. Coming from the guy called "TenGermans"...

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  50. That would actually make this bit more interesting...

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  51. yesssssssssssssss

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  52. OHHHH LOOK AT YOU. IT'S MR. SELF RIGHTEOUS MAN. YOU MUST THINK EVERYONE GOES TO 411. IF ANYTHING THAT SON OF A BITCH TOOK IT FROM THE FACEBOOK LINK. EVER THOUGHT ABOUT THAT? NO, BECAUSE YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE

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  53. I'M ROIDING TONIGHT. DO NOT FUCK WITH ME. I'LL BORK THE SHIT OUT OF YOU.

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  54. Hoping tonight is a bit of a clean slate for the product seeing as they aren't really held hostage under Rock's plans for the first time in two years.

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  55. Okay, is that a Benoit or a Hitler reference?


    Just for the Godwin's Law reference. (No, NOT the hog pen Godwinns)

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  56. I QUESTION YOUR SEXUALITY!

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  57. Yet at the same time, why on earth would he care enough to lie? He's finally taken flight as an actor, even before GI Joe/Fast Whatevers, he probably made near as much as Dwayne than he did as Rock. If they really pissed him off/whatever, no reason to play nice.

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  58. This crowd better be on their game tonight.

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  59. ASK THAT QUESTION TO YOUR MOM

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  60. The only hate crimes Benoit committed were against the rookies, his son, and his wife.


    That's right, we ain't keeping shit clean here tonight!

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  61. Just remembering the awesomeness of last years post WM crowd...*sigh*

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  62. The bar is set very high.

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  63. where you at last night? getting head for hours?

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  64. It's gonna be that kind of night. BTW I'm expecting tonights Raw thread will have a pretty high number. This one alone has gotten 300+

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  65. This live thread is already a mess.

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  66. (NCIS) Abby dressed like a baby girl: No thanks.

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  67. PEOPLE THREW A PARTY IN MY HONOR. I TOLD THEM I JUST WANTED TO WATCH MANIA

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  68. This whole thing smells like spin. Rock is spinning WWE's spin. All the while my head is spinning.

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  69. Btw props to both Disqus and the Netherlands for not fucking up last night

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  70. I'm just gonna come out and say it. Mar Solo and Dougie are the same man. You will not fool me.

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  71. Still can't be as big a mess as the show will be. And that's a BLEH opening.

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  72. like every Monday night?

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  73. Jerry please dress your age.

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  74. You must be very retarded.


    I mean, that's ridiculous!

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  75. Love them using the Rocky theme.

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  76. Heavy boos for both rock and cena. heh.

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  77. Where's Cena at? Someone's gotta open the show.

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  78. Hahaha...the crowd booing the shit out of the WM stills.

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  79. Crowd is off to a good start

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  80. I love how they're sort of retconning Cena's two WHC reigns out of existence by refusing to acknowledging them.

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  81. Ooh, that's a GOOD boo.

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  82. Love the boos.

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  83. Hollywood Hogan heat

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  84. Awwww....boo the future all you want hahahaha

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  85. Cena's time is NOW.

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  86. NJ is pissed off.

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  87. I think they're only using it because it's sampled in Diddy's song "Victory", which he performed last night, I believe.

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  88. He gained 14 pounds overnight? I guess eat Bella pussy does that to a person.

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  89. They're definitely gonna listen to these fans guys...guaranteed....HEEL TURN COMING RIGHT NOW

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  90. Actually it's the ABDUCTOR muscle.

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  91. So the Rock tore up his bread basket? Highly unlikely if you ask me.

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  92. Never saw so many 30 year olds in one building.

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  93. Not tore up. It came off the bone.

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  94. Did Cena have those sideplates at the ready in case he won?

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  95. Cena is Troll face

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  96. That is a SOUND booing.

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  97. Piper never got heel heat like that.

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  98. How do they have the balls to sell this? MIXED REACTION FOLKS

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  99. Pretty sure they made sidplates for everyone.

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  100. Cena has the perfect heel smirk.

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  101. Okay, I LIKE this Cena. He's straight up trolling these fans.

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  102. QUICK! UP THE MIC ON THE 10-YEAR-OLD GIRLS IN THE AUDIENCE!

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  103. LOL CENA TROLL

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  104. THESE POST-MANIA RAWS ARE THE BEST

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  105. It's funny, whatever happens with The Shield, I'm OK with it. They're like the opposite of Aces and Eights: they identify themselves, they have a clear goal, they're undefeated, they're good workers, and they have a GREAT talker as their lead guy. Honestly, I'd like to see HHH come out for his hour and a half post-Wrestlemania victory promo...and Shield appears out of nowhere and drops him with the triple powerbomb.

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  106. Rocky wouldn't be able to play a hostile crowd like this. Just sayin'

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  107. He's been doing this for years. He's the best. HE'S ALREADY A HEEL.

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  108. Very true.

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  109. Rocky would just turn heel. PERISH THE THOUGHT.

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  110. The Cole fake laugh was even mirth there

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  111. I want to gain 14 pounds in that case.

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  112. HAHAHAHAHA This rules.

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  113. Hahahahahaha

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  114. Damnit, HHH/Lesnar couldn't go on in front of this crowd?

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  115. If Rock gives a damn about his movie career, then WM29 was his last match ever.

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  116. And you forgot to mention "become HHH's bitch, after being mine."

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  117. Gotta love this crowd.. they are shitting all over him!! Deservedly so...

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  118. This is the most bizarro Raw I've ever seen.

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  119. Viking Space Lord Brock Lesnar, please kill this cunt and kick his hat.

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  120. He is Fred Durst

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  121. You can literally see the faces in the first few rows cringing

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  122. This HAS to be leading to an eventual heel turn, right? Nobody could be this damn clueless. It seems like he is intentionally trying to piss off the crowd.

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  123. YOU SEE THAT, KING?! EVERYBODY IS HAVING FUN TONIGHT! GOTTA LOVE IT!

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  124. WTF? He just said heel turn?

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  125. If there's just one person cheering, it's mixed. And Vince is in the back clapping his ass off like Charles Foster Kane.

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  126. Heel turn! Awwww...did you hear them cheer? LMAO

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  127. HAH! heel turn, ok cena you win tonight.

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  128. Yeah he turned me around there a bit.

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  129. Die Rocky Die??? Rocky would have the crown eating out of his hands by the end of the promo.. even if they booed him for 20 mins straight.

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  130. Heel turn. What a troll...ahahahaha.

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  131. IT'S FUNNY BC I BET VINCE IS TELLING COLE TO FAKE LAUGH RIGHT NOW SO WE CAN ALL KNOW THAT HE IS TROLLING US

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  132. The back of his shirt says "RT time=NOW"....What. A. Dweeb.

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  133. Is that a "same old shit" chant??? Yikes!

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  134. God bless that production crew. They're trying their damnedest to find the few Cena fans in attendance.

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  135. Same old shit. This crowd's definitely been pumped up.

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  136. same old shit...haha good crowd.

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  137. ANYONE that comes out and interrupts Cena will be declared GOD tonight. I wish it would be Batista...

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  138. Or focus on the obvious plants

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  139. Saying Batista around is my bit boo

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  140. Nice burying of the others there Cena. And hi Mark.

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  141. KILL THAT WHITE MAN!

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  142. Yes. WIG SPLIT

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  143. CHOCOLATE HOMICIDE!

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  144. New #1 Babyface - Mark Henry.

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  145. Please break his jaw, Mark. Please.

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  146. Watching Cena work this crowd is hilarious.

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  147. The three Army guys clapping made me throw up a little bit in my mouth.

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  148. I'm fine with some wig splitting.

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  149. NIGHTMARE IN EBONY!

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  150. Starting the NCAA finals at 9:23pm is freakin' insane!

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  151. Mark Henry is my new favorite wrestler. All the rest are now tied for second.

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  152. Notice, Mark Henry comes out... and Cena's not grinning like an idiot... yet.

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  153. Don't they realize that students at these fine institutions want to go to bed early for class tomorrow?!?

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  154. If he'd win tonight, I'd make him first.

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  155. Please don't lead into an "Everybody in the locker room comes out one-by-one to cut a promo" segment.

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  156. Would Mark Henry's entrance have the same effect if it was "Sexualllllllllllll....".

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  157. Oh Mark, you'll never live that one down.

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  158. Mark. Murder him. No one will prosecute you, I promise.

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  159. LMFAO...okay, Cena is actually funny right now

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  160. "Dont pay attention to them" Haha

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  161. Mizark shoulda decked him after he turned his back

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  162. How did Henry not crack up at Cena's "sex with chocolate" line?

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  163. Now they're chanting for Ryback????

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  164. I'm confused as to why the crowd loves Ryback so much.

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  165. Well, I'll give it to'em.


    Try as they might to kill off Ryback, people still seem to be behind him.

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  166. It didn't last long.

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  167. I thought they were both going to crack.

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  168. Okay, the crowd isn't cool anymore. Really? Luger? I mean, Ryback?

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  169. Aaaaaaand no one cares what this crowd does from this point forward....good work lol

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  170. Looks like someone is going to get their ass kicked.

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  171. Mark Henry has stinky breath apparently.

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  172. TAG TEAM MATCH, PLAYA

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  173. It's called acting. Cena clearly needs some lessons in that.

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  174. "The breath of a thousand asses." Dear lord, who wrote that line

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  175. That isn't Teddy Long you racist

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  176. HE USED THAT LINE IN A BATTLE RAP AGAINST BIG SHOW

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  177. No, since when do WRESTLERS get to make their own matches? That'd be WACKY!

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  178. I didn't think it was funny at all.

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  179. A LONG TIME AGO

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  180. ^ Couldn't compliment a hilarious improv line...had to be a cunt instead....


    PLUS ONE GUY!

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  181. When did Booker T become Raw GM?? Where is Vicki?

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  182. Wow, Rock getting no love at all...

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  183. WE NEED AUTHORITY FIGURES TO ENABLE EVERYTHING BECAUSE THAT'S THE WAY WE'VE DONE IT SINCE 1998

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