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The SmarK RAW Rant–06.10.13

The SmarK RAW Rant – 06.10.13

I ordered an iPad off Ebay tonight, which makes me feel dirty as a devoted Android user, but DAMMIT I want to play You Don’t Know Jack outside of Facebook and hopefully not have Gmail crash on me all the time.

Live from Richmond, VA, which is a smaller city so it’s only mentioned in passing later in the show.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler & JBL

HHH v. Curtis Axel

Holy cow, they’re actually delivering an advertised match! Well, no, as HHH attacks and then Vince immediately comes out to interrupt, and tells the timekeeper to award the match to Axel as a result of a DQ at 0:34. However, HHH uses his powers as COO to restart the match, and Vince comes out again and this time Axel wins by forfeit. That’s a little dubious, even for Vince. So this time HHH restarts it as an Iron Man match, and Vince finally just sends Axel back to the dressing room and confiscates the ringbell. Minor question in all this bullshit I suppose, but why wouldn’t Vince just award the match to HHH?

Dean Ambrose v. Kane

Ambrose chokes him out a bit, but Kane comes back with a backbreaker and drops a knee on the back. Backbreaker and Kane tosses him as another ref runs the emergency backup bell to ringside, and they brawl on the floor. We take a break and return with Ambrose in control with a dropkick as we get yet another plug for someone watching TV on the App. They kind of aimlessly roll around on the mat and Kane blocks a tornado DDT and comes back with another backbreaker for two. Sideslam gets two. They fight on the top and Kane comes down with a flying clothesline and the Shield runs in for the DQ at 10:50. Boy, this was a whole lot of nothing. *1/2

Meanwhile, Vickie announces that Daniel Bryan & Randy Orton challenge for the tag titles at the PPV, and Kane gets a US title shot.

Miz v. Cody Rhodes

Miz fires away, but Cody gets a front suplex for two and tries an indian deathlock for some reason. Miz quickly comes back and finishes with the figure-four at 2:34. * Paul Heyman then comes out and adds Curtis Axel to the IC title match at the PPV. That’s some weird booking.

Meanwhile, Stephanie confronts Vince, because now she’s a babyface again and Vince is the money-grubbing heel promoter again. Ratings in the toilet? MORE MCMAHONS!

Chris Jericho joins us, still trying to find some hook for the Punk match that may or may not happen on Sunday. Much like Jaws 3D, this time it’s really, REALLY personal. This brings out Dolph Ziggler, who offers up Big E for Jericho, right now.

Big E Langston v. Chris Jericho

We’re joined after a break with Langston working the neck, but Jericho tosses him. That backfires as Big E sends him into the stairs, and back in for two. Jericho rolls him up out of the corner, but Langston clotheslines him for two. E goes back to the neck, but Jericho dropkicks him for two. Langston with backbreakers for two as the parade of retarded tweets continues. “Kane as US champ would rock :D” declares one. Are people getting stupider? Ziggler runs interference and Langston puts Jericho down and sets up to finish, but Del Rio runs out to brawl with Ziggler and Jericho finishes with the codebreaker at 6:19. This was fine, Langston’s got nothing going on at the PPV anyway. Although as usual Ziggler looks like a big loser. **1/4

Sin Cara v. Antonio Cesaro

Speaking of big losers, I’m not liking Cesaro’s chances here. Cara quickly tries the ropewalk armdrag, but Cesaro crotches him and stomps away. Uncle Zeb is on commentary, so apparently Swagger v. Sin Cara is the next thrilling feud to headline veteran’s halls everywhere. Like really, isn’t Sin Cara a step WAY down? Can’t they find any bigger Mexican stars for Zeb to hate? Cara gets a flip powerbomb for two, but walks into a backbreaker, a swinging sleeper, and the NEUTRALIZER at 3:44 to finish. Well thank god for that at least. *1/2 No idea what this was on here for.

Meanwhile, Brad and Vickie shill hamburgers. I think the reason they don’t run Canada very much any more is because we don’t have any of their sponsors up here and thus rob them of chances for quality product tie-ins like these.

Randy Orton v. Roman Reigns

Orton stomps him down for two and they brawl outside, where Orton beats on him and gets two in the ring. Reigns slugs him down, but Orton pounds away in the corner before getting dumped to the floor. And we take a break. Back with Roman holding a chinlock, and a clothesline gets two as I find out we’re only at the end of the second hour. I feel like I’ve been watching this show all night. Orton comes back with the draping DDT and the Shield threatens to run in, but Bryan assists in holding them off and it’s some sort of no contest at 13:00. So we’re right into the next match…

Daniel Bryan v. Seth Rollins

Bryan evades him and hits a clothesline as the crowd continues to go nuts for Bryan like no one else on the show. Bryan batters him with kicks and elbows (giving the crowd a chance to “Yes” with each one) and that gets two. Bryan puts him on the floor and follows with a high knee off the apron, and back in for two. Rollins takes him into the turnbuckles to break up the assault, and gets his own surfboard on Bryan. Bryan powers out of it and works the leg, however, then turns it into his own, which then becomes a dragon sleeper. BATTLE SURFBOARD! Rollins escapes with a cheapshot and we take a break. Back with Rollins hitting a dropkick for two and holding a sleeper on the mat, but Bryan does an amazing reversal of an enzuigiri into a kneebar. Bryan comes back with the kicks in the corner and a dropkick for two. More kicks follow, but Rollins gets his enzuigiri for two. He throws his own kicks, but Bryan flips out of a german suplex, so Seth powerbombs him into the corner for two. Never not awesome. Bryan backdrops him to the floor and follows with a dive, but Rollins blocks that and comes back in with the knee, which misses. Bryan gets a german suplex into the big kick for two and makes the comeback. He goes up and suckers Rollins into following, then brings him down with a top rope backdrop suplex that puts both guys down. Orton and Reigns get involved, but Bryan cradles for the pin at 16:32. Bryan is just on another planet of greatness this year. ***3/4

Kaitlyn is out to meet her secret admirer. And it’s Big E Langston, as suspected. And then after all those weeks of buildup, Big E reveals that it was all just AJ messing with her all along. This apparently leads to the LONG awaited title match on Sunday.

Damien Sandow v. R-Truth

Really, this match three hours into the show? Sandow is rocking the 1990 Rick Martel color scheme tonight and finishes with a Side Effect at 3:15. Sheamus comes out afterwards to build up their YouTube match on Sunday.

Meanwhile, Stephanie is looking for HHH. We take a break and return with all three McMahons arguing backstage, until Stephanie leaves HHH and Vince alone together to work it out, and they basically agree that Curtis Axel is a geek not worth their time, and hug it out. What is this storyline even ABOUT?

John Cena is out for a main event interview at 3 hours and 10 minutes into this borefest, and he talks and talks and talks and talks and Ryback talks and talks and talks and they want to FIGHT but Mean Gene Okerlund is like “Gentleman, this is neither the time nor the place!” and the lumberjacks hold them back from fighting, thus literally accomplishing the opposite of everything you would normally expect of lumberjacks surrounding a wrestling ring on a wrestling show. Kind of apropos for this show, I guess.

The Pulse

Illegally download Bryan v. Rollins just to say “fuck you” to WWE and ignore the rest of this one. This PPV might literally be no buys, not just the snarky usual internet thing. Like, literally, NO ONE is buying this show, I bet.

Comments

  1. Scott- How do you bring yourself to watching this show every week? I hope you are either making a ton off the paid clicks on this site or saint hood is in your future because this was one of the worst shows I have ever seen.

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  2. If given the choice between watching this and forceful sex with someone not of your sexual preference... Hello, cock!

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  3. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomeryJune 11, 2013 at 1:14 AM

    Basically how I watch RAW whenever Bryan isn't wrestling:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zwc1Wi-mlCI

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  4. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomeryJune 11, 2013 at 1:15 AM

    Vince can answer that for you:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ci_6CQ5R558

    And for God's sake, don't even entertain the idea of Scott not watching RAW, because the rants are always entertaining.

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  5. I got the impression they're looking to pair Zeb Colter with Antonio Cesaro, which makes sense considering Zeb's love of foreigners taking (or in Cesaro's case, doing) American jobs.

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  6. Yeah reading the Raw rant is so much better than trying to watch it. its great to have Cesaro back with a win so ill look for that & finally we get Black-Danielson match. They've been feuding for over 6 months! shield-Hell no is probably feud of the year actually. (moty is hands down Taker-Punk unless we get Brock-Punk @ summerslam.

    Thoughts?

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  7. davidbonzaisaldanamontgomeryJune 11, 2013 at 1:54 AM

    I want an iPad, just so I can feel like one of the kids from Ender's Game

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  8. Putting Cesaro with Zeb NOW just makes me more depressed that we couldn't have gotten Cesaro vs. Del Rio at Wrestlemania. It becomes more baffling by the day that Jack Swagger (of all people) was the one the company decided to instantly elevate into a high-profile Mania title bout when they had so many other worthy midcard heels just sitting there doing nothing, like Barrett, Rhodes, Sandow, Cesaro, etc.

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  9. Black man on white woman violence.

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  10. Yep, the upcoming last season is only going to have 6 episodes to boot.
    And cable channels wonder why smart people are dumping cable for streaming players.

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  11. I don't have an iPad, so I feel like Cartman.

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  12. Does it ever strike people as ironic when they mock "stupid" wrestling fans (who watch the show cause they genuinely like it, not cause they liked it when they were kids and now they hate it but the universe won't let them stop watching... or something) considering how often the rest of the world has mocked them for liking a fake sport where oiled up guys pretend to fight?


    Where's that Ambrose interview (where he rightly points out how fucking stupid wrestling really is) when you need it?


    It's a dumb sport but we all love it, do we really need to eat our own?

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  13. I withdraw my question.


    /bites chocolate bar

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  14. Is this it?


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qa2vU2znlAE

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  15. Yep that's it, thanks.


    And just to clarify, although I agree with Ambrose here, my original point is not the same as the one he's making here. I just love how he says it.

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  16. Talking about things other than RAW is also a trait commonly used by the RAW announce team. Gotta plug that WWE App after all.
    Whatever happened to that stupid fad gadget they spent $5 million on and then proceeded to never mention again, also known as Tout? If they're going to throw away money like that, they might as well invest it in some bad Uwe Boll movies.

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  17. I'm not a huge tech guy, but I see that Vine is becoming a big thing. What exactly is the difference between the 2? I think Vine's videos are even shorter (like 6 seconds), whereas Tout's seemed like the perfect amount of time. So why has Vine taken off and not Tout?

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  18. I was actually getting excited at the possibility of Sexual Chocolate v2.0 for Big E.

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  19. There's a service that's been around for almost a decade where you can do the exact same thing that you can do on Tout and Vine except you can post a video for a much longer period of time than on those two fad gadgets and it's much more popular, more versatile and has more staying power than Tout and Vine. It's called YouTube.
    And I'm willing to bet that YouTube will still be around long after Tout, Vine and [insert latest fly-by-night social media trend here] cease to exist.

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  20. MOTY is not hands down Taker-Punk, it's Cena/Punk just before Mania, that blew away anything else the WWE has done all year.

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  21. But I have no idea how they are going to get from Bryan's thing with Orton and The Shield to a title match with Cena in one month.

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  22. Again, SUPER ignorant person here, but I think there's a spot to be filled here. People like making short, quick videos on their phones and posting them to their Twitter (which is definitely not going anywhere) easily.


    If Youtube can do all that already, then I'll shut up. I just always thought YT was a little more cumbersome when it came to posting, or linking on Twitter. Like isn't Vine connected to your Twitter account or something?


    I'm in over my head.

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  23. Orton/DB 'fall out' at the Payback PPV, they have some kind of Number one contenders match on Raw which DB wins getting a big win over a credible opponent, keeping his momentum going too MITB.

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  24. I don't think they're gonna. Swooping in and taking DB's program is what Mark Henry does.

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  25. Are you talking about the tweets? Because even if I was totally in love with the show, these tweets would be moronic. And I'm guessing they screen them, so they're the "best of the best", so to speak.


    I've seen some of the other ones when guys like Punk re-tweet them to show some of the crap they get sent.

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  26. I sensed that Cena aggressively cut off Ryback when he went to make fun of Cena for using poopy jokes. I sense some insecurity.

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  27. I think that the Divas match will surprise on the good side. I think that they kept putting it off until AJ and Kaitlyn could rehearse the hell of the match and pull off something decent.

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  28. I'm not saying they were witty or insightful, but moronic? What's moronic about "Yay! Kane would rock as US champ!" or "Looking forward to (blank) vs (blank)!!!". One person called Kane and Vickie hugging "cute" (or something like that) in a clearly playful way. Some people just want to run in the race, not stand on the sidelines and make fun of how everyone else looks in shorts (don't remember who said that).


    I'm not familiar enough with Punk's account (I used to follow him but not for a while). Is he tweeting out people insulting him (as I saw him do from time to time, usually it was about him being doughy) or stuff like this? If it was the insults then that's fine. But if he is mocking people like this that's stupid too. I'm sure the guy gets a lot of side eyes, snickers, and eye rolls, including from celebs who have a higher level of fame than him (and are perceived to be "cooler"). It doesn't feel good (no matter what he says, I'm sure it hurt in high school or the guy wouldn't have developed such a big chip on his shoulder). Again, I'd want to see what kind of tweets they were, though.


    Wrestling is mindless entertainment, even the "critically acclaimed" stuff like Punk on the road to MitB can't hold a candle to the storytelling in critically acclaimed books, movies, tv shows, etc.


    It reminds me of when I see comic book/sci-fi geeks act like exclusionary assholes and mock people who don't have 1/8th of the knowledge they do on the subject. Acting just as assholish as the people who mock them for being fans in the first place.


    tl;dr: Treat others the way you wished you had been treated.

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  29. Maybe. I see it as nothing but a buffer match to allow the fans to catch a break.

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  30. as if Ryback would do a non-written promo.

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  31. and I guess the main event won't be horrible as well. the stipulations should keep it from Ryback totally screwing it up.

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  32. I have doubts whether Ryback can wrestle 3 matches, though.

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  33. btw, even if I somewhat agree: there is a huge difference between mocking someone for liking something or mocking someone for not knowing enough about a subject yet.

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  34. www.youtube.com/watch?v=8VEAXDV1Sr4


    same video. better quality.

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  35. Well my sense was Ryback was sticking to script, as usual, when Cena, channeled his bizarre obsession with fecal matter and brought up diapers.

    Even a blind squirrel finds a nut once in a while, so Ryback basically goes to say "AGAIN with the poop?" But Cena, recognizing that his love of doody is as off-limits as Hogan's receding hair-line in the 80s, IMMEDIATELY cuts him off.

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  36. I think it depends on the situation. If it's 2 buddies, or people that run in the same social circle, fine. But if you're acting like a dick to some newbie fan just cause you can, while at night you cry yourself to sleep from bad memories of being stuffed in a locker for wearing a Picard>Kirk t-shirt, you should know better.

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  37. So, if I read that first half hour right, Curtis Axel is now 93-0, with 80 wins over HHH.


    Don't say Hunter never does a job to elevate the talent.

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  38. Bryan/Orton lose the tag match, have a #1 contendership match for the title, viola.


    Now you MIGHT say 'hang on there, Selby - but Bryan and Orton LOST a tag title match. How on earth do they deserve a #1 contendership spot for the WWE title?!'.


    [wwe] They just do, alright? [/wwe]

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  39. Ah, yeh. What I wrote. Should have read this.


    Yep, perfect WWE logic. And I don't mind it, for once.

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  40. Jason Jeffrey BallJune 11, 2013 at 5:07 AM

    Biggest drawback on this show: The fake crying from Kaitlyn and Steph. Dear god...Don't "cry" if you can't make it look good. Do a scowl or something for christsakes!

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  41. Getting around YouTube copyright protection.

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  42. Jason Jeffrey BallJune 11, 2013 at 5:10 AM

    Also, I will say it one more time: lose an hour from this show, keep Rollins, Ambrose, Ziggler and Bryan in 15 minutes matches and stop schiling so much for that friggin' app or whatever else. Then I don't mind Kaitlyn/Steph or the McMahons on my TV as much.

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  43. They make money from the app and the extra hour of RAW. Deal with it.

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  44. I'm glad they're (presumably) going to put the Intercontinental title on Axel. The IC champ should be at or near main-event level, somebody who could realistically be a WWE/World title threat. Barrett just isn't that guy (nor is Miz or Fandango). Personally I don't think Axel is all that great either, but WWE seems committed to making him a big deal, so he can do more for the title than a midcarder. Axel as IC champ can feud with guys like Sheamus, Jericho and whoever they keep as a babyface from the Kane-Bryan-Orton trio, and WWE can still keep up the cheap-wins gimmick for Axel where he has a long IC title reign with only a few clean wins.
    I was going to put Del Rio in that group of babyfaces, but what I'd really like to see at Payback is a double-turn for ADR and Ziggler. Have Del Rio cheat during the match and Ziggler wrestle like a plucky babyface to prep the crowd to want Ziggler to win, but at the end, Big E turns on Ziggler. It'll turn out that Del Rio, after wrestling Big E so many times while Ziggler was out, grew to respect/fear his ability and secretly hired Big E away from Ziggler. Because Del Rio is rich, remember? So then you'd have Del Rio back in his Million Dollar Man role (where he's much better than his face character) with Big E as 21st-century Virgil.

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  45. Eeer because WWE does logic??? Ryback became number one contender by losing the last bazillion PPV's in a row including WM29. Who cares how they make DB No1 contender just make it happen!

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  46. I don't the stipulations to be honest. The 3 stages are so random and they never had a track record of being a great match. I've never liked one ambulance match. It's almost as if the stipulations are handcuffing them rather than enhancing the entertainment value of the match.

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  47. us on ambrose
    ic on axel.
    Maybe they are finally going to give the midcard its due for the first time in ten years.
    And seriously COOHHH is the worst character of all time. He's a natural heel he is HORRID as a face, all he does as a face is leech heat off the hottest acts going at the time in an effort to put himself more over. Give it up "Paul"

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  48. Ryback became the number one contender by beating down John Cena. Do you want to turn Daniel Bryan heel again? If not, then you will need to build a logical framework for it to happen.

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  49. I was there live last night and it's the first Raw I've ever attended. A few thoughts here and there:

    Biggest Pops:

    4) Jericho

    3) HHH

    2) (Anyone who knows me knows this pains me) Randy Orton: Wow, I take back saying the guy didn't have heat. People exploded for him during his entrance AND during the match. I totally get why they're reluctant to turn him heel now. I still don't like him but I was completely wrong about how people feel about him.


    1) Daniel Bryan: Bocce balls was he over. People were chanting "yes!" before the show, they were nuclear during his match, and were deflated after.



    I don't know if it was because the Daniel Bryan-Seth Rollins match exhausted the fans (my hope) or because there was a good mix of little kids and they were tired but the backstage McMahon drama and then the Cena/Ryback stuff deflated the crowd.



    Also, maybe Cena sells the most merchandise because he has something like four different shirts. Interestingly, while I saw a lot of Cena gear I saw a lot, a lot, a lot of Sheamus, Punk, Orton, and a decent amount of Daniel Bryan stuff.

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  50. Why "Paul" in quotes? That's his real name.

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  51. Upvote for your username

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  52. The gist of the segment was fine, but all three need to work on their timing and delivery. They didn't get to the point half quick enough. And Big E. sucked on a live mic, he needs to channel some of his fun persona on Twitter because he sounded Michael Elgin level nervous.

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  53. Am I the only one that is disappointed that there aren't a dozen rambling psychotic Jesse posts when they open the raw thread?

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  54. YankeesHoganTripleHFanJune 11, 2013 at 6:30 AM

    You know I might be the biggest Triple H fan on this site and even I can't defend last night. Wouldn't it make more sense to Hunter to wrestle the match, suffer an even worse concussion, (complete with stretcher, neck brace, oxygen mask, and the announcers using their "Owen Hart" voice,) Hunter is out for a few months, and THEN he defies Vince and Stephanie, to make his comeback. And meanwhile Axle can say he wins again. Makes perfect sense to me.

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  55. Just read a review of the Waltman 1994 shoot on 411. Shockingly, it makes Bret look like a prick that takes himself way too seriously.

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  56. As if he wasn't? I think he was one of the greatest wrestlers ever, but he has always come off and was described to be a prick.

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  57. I'm a fan of Randy Orton (he's not one of my all-time favourites, but overall I enjoy his work) and it amazes me how many people on this blog act like the guy is a lost cause (coughRyanMurphycough). Motherfucker is OVER, in every city and country, and you just do not let a guy like that go. In today's WWE, with crowds the way they are (usually in the lukewarm area unless it's smarky), you find a place for the man.


    In fact, given the consistency of his pops, and his full-time status, I'd say he's the most over babyface they've had since Punk turned (D-Bry needs a few more ABs to qualify for the title), and has never fallen out of the top 2 in 3 years.

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  58. As an Orton fan and a Bryan fan I hope that they put some faith in Bryan because he can easily take Orton's spot on the face depth chart(he already has) freeing Orton up for a desperately needed heel turn. Yes Orton is tremendously over still but he's hit a wall. A heel turn and feud with Bryan could do wonders for both of them; creatively for Orton and moving up the pecking order for Bryan.

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  59. You don't get it, as a big time star who is one of the few men in wrestling history to legitimately be asked to carry a company, he needs to have been a super nice guy who was accommodating to everyone.


    You know, like Flair... oh. Or Hogan.... wait... HBK.....um.... Nash?.... HHH....um.... Austin?....Goldberg....Savage.....


    Okay, like Rock and Sting. He needs to have been like Rock and Sting, the exceptions to the rule.

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  60. Here's a link to the review

    http://www.411mania.com/wrestling/video_reviews/286971/Kayfabe!-Timeline-The-History-of-WWE-1994-As-Told-By-Sean-Waltman.htm

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  61. Say that in English this time.

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  62. Not gonna lie Kaitlyn is a guilty pleasure of mine. I dig her.

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  63. I'm not an Orton fan and I was floored by how over he was.

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  64. Undertaker vs. FakerTaker always seemed a little abrupt. Now we know. Bret robbed us of a classic!


    On a serious note, this sounds interesting but I'm not sure I could listen to X-Pac for a few hours. His raspy voice grates me.

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  65. Does he usually post in live-threads? I just see him post in comic related posts.

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  66. Curious about this whole Triple H/McMahon concussion storyline, is it 2003 and no one tell me?

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  67. I'm saying most top guys over the past 25 years have been "pricks" in some way or another. Guys like Rock, Sting, and Foley are outliers.


    It was sarcasm.

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  68. I never called him a prick. I just think he was way too bitter.

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  69. You should check it out. It's one of the better additions of the series and he's pretty spot on and gives good insight on basically everything thats brought up

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  70. The Divas match sjould be interesting because for once it should have some heat and plus yhe Chivago crowd is going to make AJ the babyface. Hopefully they'll do the right hing and make AJ the champ, although show is going to make Cena the only babyface champion in the WWE.

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  71. I see no reason for it to be a guilty one. Girl is fiiiiiine.

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  72. If they put Bryan over Orton and set up Bryan v. Cena at Money in the Bank they have the potential to make Daniel Bryan into a megastar. I'm admittedly biased but the crowd was bonzo gonzo for him last night.

    I'm not saying they have to recreate the Summer of Punk with Daniel Bryan but if Cena puts Bryan over the way he put Punk over, Bryan makes the leap.

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  73. I'm not a fan of Orton's work, honestly. I would rather Bryan feud with Cena and have Orton be the heel on Smackdown (feud with a face Ziggler?).

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  74. I was sarcastically admonishing you cause you had the right idea, but it was taking a shot at the original comment.


    You'll get no argument from me that the man was bitter.

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  75. I think it somewhat has to do with first impressions when you actually believed in their characters. It may sound weird but hear me out. The first time I saw Stone Cold he was a foul mouthed beer drinking asshole. That was always my(markish first impression) and thus when I learned in real life that he was kind of an asshole it didn't seem so far fetched.

    My first impression of Bret was of a hard working, talented, noble good guy. White meat babyface. To grow up and get a different image is a little harder to swallow. Same with Shawn.

    At least that's the was with me. Yes Austin could be a jerk in real life but that's par for the course. I expected it. But Bret Hart is supposed to be humble and noble and kind and awesome! By the way, I'm not as hard on Bret as a lot of people here, I'm just offering some different insight.

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  76. I used to hate Waltman when he was still active (as in WWE, not his more recent TNA appearances), but seeing him in shoots has changed my opinion completely.

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  77. Not an extended feud but y'know a match or something to bridge the gap between a possible feud with Cena. But I know not their plans. They could book Cena-Bryan for MITB and I'd take that over Orton-Bryan because Bryan deserves that spot. But if they wait for Summerslam then a perfect primer for Bryan to take that spot is through Orton.


    It's hard to imagine a face Ziggler because they'd probably take away the interest of his character.

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  78. Yea, sobered up he seems like a mellow and happy guy now

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  79. Mark Henry beat him down too! But because Ryback beat up Henry I suppose that makes him No1 contender? Seriously it is really not difficult at all to make Bryan or anyone mildly over for that matter a No1 contender in a short few weeks. I think you're being facetious.

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  80. No I mean like personality wise. From what I've seen of her she has a good personality and humor about her. I even dig the terribleness of her wrestling haha. But yes, she is a lovely lady.

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  81. I think you're bang on, I was the same way for the guys I "grew up" with (basically the 90s).


    I mentioned in another post how much I used to hate Waltman, and it was just hating his character (heel 123Kid-Syxx-Xpac) plus hearing a couple of negative stories and suddenly he's a huge prick in my book. Seeing him in shoot interviews has changed my opinion of him completely, he's one of my favourtie retired personalities now.

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  82. Bryan/Rollins in the ring together just works too perfectly. As I said previously, being that they are fine with working the stiff ROH style with each other, they can go balls to the wall and just deliver a sick match, without worrying if the other guy is "ok" with the stiffness or moves being done

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  83. That's one of the reasons I don't mind the booking of John Cena the past 9 years (as in he wins a lot, not his jokey persona). He's the measuring stick, and beating him (convincingly, like Punk did) can make a guy for life.

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  84. She's definitely that perfect "girl next door" type - ridiculously hot, but sweet enough that she'd marry the biggest nerd in school.

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  85. It's funny: they've rarely had so many workers from other places(Canada, England, Scotland, Ireland, Mexico, India, South Africa, Switzerland); and yet Swagger only goes after the Mexicans. Biting political commentary or short-sighted racism? TUNE INTO NITRO TO FIND OUT!( Oops, stole Scott's catchphrase. My bad.)

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  86. Truth. Depending on the booking I'd love to see Bryan go over Orton at Payback and Cena at Money in the Bank.

    They're not going to turn Cena heel but I'd be interested to see him on Smackdown as the focal point.

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  87. I know I'm probably stating the obvious, but since Zeb clearly stated he had no issue with Cesaro, an immigrant from a white-person country, and continued to declare Sin Cara sneaked across the border, then yes, they're going for the racism angle, and that's pretty tasteless in 2013.

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  88. A psychotic Orton with the mentally unstable AJ? That's an interesting paring. Almost Joker-Harley like.

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  89. We're going to have to agree to disagree that Orton is charismatic to pull off a Joker type role. Ambrose on the other hand...

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  90. He doesn't need anyone to click on the links to make money. Or at least he shouldn't.

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  91. What I hate is that HHH doesn't need to be on TV in a featured angle anymore. He's a part-timer with a gut now...why not give it to your younger world champion who has suffered an ACTUAL concussion? It would have given Dolph a lot of sympathy and when he came back, he'd become the babyface everyone wants him to be. With his selling and athleticism, he could become a new main-eventer...but they don't seem to be too interested in making new stars.


    And darn right on Daniel Bryan. Although I wish he'd stop using the german and the flying headbutt. Too much impact on a head that's probably suffered at least half a dozen concussions already.

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  92. I cannot forget the day Bryan Danielson signed with WWE, and the amount of hate he actually received. People called him a vanilla midget with no charisma. Now look at him. He's one of the most charismatic wrestlers and perhaps the hottest thing in the company. He has made WWE's creative team look like geniuses via making the best out of the situation. Team Hell No had a recipe for disaster, and made me upset because it was a way to get Bryan out of the title picture. But Team Hell No actually became one of my favorite tag teams in recent history, and Daniel Bryan made me find Kane interesting for the first time in perhaps 15 years.

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  93. Because racism should never be discussed. Only talked about in hushed tones with your white friends.

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  94. Who called him a vanilla midget with no charisma?

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  95. I don't know about you, but I like the idea that my prick is sensitive.

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  96. Not to be an asshole, but Jaws 4 was all about revenge and things getting personal. It also had a roaring shark, and was the basis for the Nintendo game, which will soon be seen in a Pawn Shop in Hill Valley.



    Jaws 3D was originally going to be a National Lampoon film called Jaws: 3 People: 0. Instead they rocked the 3D gimmick that was so popular during that time.

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  97. thats asking a lot.

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  98. "Maybe they are finally going to give the midcard its due for the first time in ten years."


    you're asking for a lot.

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  99. Hey Bret! We need you to keep it under 25 so we can blow off this Undertaker thing.
    Sure, no prob! (Fuck those motherfuckers. I'm Bret Hart. I'll go 45 if I want to.)

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  100. i have 89 with Bruti... is it worth it?

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  101. Seeing those two try and pull off that dynamic would be hilarious. Two of the worst at acting in wrestling.

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  102. Do the Tea Party groups they're protraying ever mention European Immigrants? Of course not.

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  103. I knew we were in trouble when the opening montage was of HHH/Axel and not Hell No/Shield. I got so bored I couldn't even be bothered to wait for the Bryan match...

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  104. You'd be surprise at the amount of comments I read with people saying that. Not here in particular but certainty elsewhere. 411mania comes to mind.

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  105. Just out of curiosity, who would you call 2 of the best at acting in wrestling? Cause everybody pretty much sucks at acting in wrestling.


    Note: this post is in defense of AJ, everyone knows that Orton is the worst.

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  106. Right now? Probably Bryan and Kane. Those skits should not have worked but they sold the shit out of them.


    And I have no idea how you can defend AJ, she is easily one of the worst promos ever.

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  107. That's why I said "almost". I really can't stand AJ on my screen. To me, she's getting X-Pac-level heat. I just mentioned it because they're the two closest "psycho" characters out there, not necessarily an endorsement.

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  108. Your_Favourite_AssholeJune 11, 2013 at 8:37 AM

    'Ratings in the toilet? MORE MCMAHONS!'


    i know we all joke about this but do you legit think this is their mindset?

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  109. Oh don't get it twisted - this isn't an endorsement of more Orton-AJ on my screen. They're just recognized by the Fed as the two most crazy characters.


    Really, if AJ flew to her home planet, I would not shed a tear.

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  110. YankeesHoganTripleHFanJune 11, 2013 at 8:39 AM

    My dislike of the angle is pretty simple. Triple H is my favorite wrestler, I want to see him wrestle. At the end of the show we didn't even know if they are doing the HHH/Axle match next week or not

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  111. She's over for a reason. She knows how to ham it up to get the point across to the live crowd. She's a terrible actress in any other setting but is good for wrestling. You're acting like she's Sable.


    I'll give you Kane, he is actually pretty good. But D-Bry? You'd cringe if you saw that kind acting on TV, in movies, etc. That's some "high school play" caliber of acting. But it's fine (and effective) for pro wrestling.

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  112. Oh yeah. In fact they're specifically trying to increase their female viewership with the soap opera mentality.

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  113. She is over because she got put with Bryan, Punk, and Ziggler. If she was on her own, nobody would give a shit about her.


    She is cringe worthy every time. No hyperbole, she is top 5 worst promo of all time.


    And I'm not talking about how these guys would translate out of wrestling, just strictly sports entertainment acting scale.

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  114. Your_Favourite_AssholeJune 11, 2013 at 8:48 AM

    i bet their booking is comprised of if-then statements


    'if ratings < x-.0000000000001,' then import [random] mcmahon from library' where x is whatever minimum they feel they need to rule the world

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  115. Your_Favourite_AssholeJune 11, 2013 at 8:50 AM

    she has a tattoo of a heart i think on her butt

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  116. Your_Favourite_AssholeJune 11, 2013 at 8:53 AM

    you make devon and/or bubba a sad dudley :(

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  117. You think they could have plugged any of the other divas in her spot, and they would have gotten just as over? I disagree. The girl is *very* talented and has a natural charisma (that "X" factor they wouldn't shut the fuck up about last year) that you can't teach. She comes across as a natural underdog. She played a huge role in Bryan getting over to the degree he did. People hated seeing him treat her like garbage and play with her emotions.

    Non-over divas are paired with wrestlers all the time. Why did it click with AJ but not with Alicia Fox/Edge? Or the Bellas with D-Bry? Or Gail Kim with D-Bry? Or Kaitlyn with Ziggler? Or Serena with Punk (the SES as a whole was over, but not her individually)?



    You're being blinded by irrational AJ hate.

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  118. You clearly didn't know him.

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  119. very true. i started with ROH's second dvd Round Robin I (Drag/Low-Ki/Daniels) in 02 and never thought he would be anything but an indy kid. definitely could wrestle but that was it.


    left for europe in 04 and missed his big ascension in ROH and came back to ROH in like 08-09 sparingly.

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  120. Because those pairings weren't given multiple segments a night on Raw and multiple PPV main events.


    And we're not going start the revisionist history with AJ and Bryan. The Yes! chants got him over. Diego Sanchez had more to do with Bryan getting over than she did.


    She has no idea how to cut a promo. Every AJ promo is the same. Pausing every word and tilting her head 37 times a minute.


    Also, I refuse to believe Alicia Fox and Edge was a thing that existed.

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  121. I think what's surprised everyone the most is most (myself included) assumed Bryan would get over the Chris Benoit way: put on amazing wrestling clinics on a nightly basis, getting over purely on his wrestling ability alone.


    And honestly, his original promo work when he first came in was terrible. But it slowly improved. And then he suddenly got over BECAUSE of his promo work.


    So now, he's one of the best for promos AND puts on a clinic in the ring on a weekly basis. It's no wonder he's their most over wrestler right now.

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  122. Yep, the 'YES' chants helped put Bryan over the top, but you can't act like AJ didn't play a huge role in his overness. Didn't those chants only start catching on in like February? His entire schtick basically revolved around acting like the GOAT and treating her badly. She's not THE reason, but she's a reason (along with the Miz feud and the chants).


    She started getting multiple segments and multiple ppv main events BECAUSE she was over, this isn't a chicken/egg thing.


    I don't know what else to say. "Crowd don't lie" may be it. She's over, *independant* of any other wrestler. Serena got a lot of face time with the SES, and it was crickets if she wrestled/talked without Punk. That's the best comp I've got, cause you haven't seen a female in AJ's position in the last decade.


    We've seen it too many times in wrestling. Just being associated with someone who's over doesn't mean it automatically rubs off. You've got to bring something to the table, and she does that.

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  123. She should get a tattoo of a butt on her butt...with a little butt shaped tattoo on the first tattoo of a butt.

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  124. That seemed like the idea for Big E. He was supposed to seem nervous and shy talking to the girl he had fallen for.

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  125. I want to know what they were thinking with the hug it out segment? It was just like they decided midstream that this angle was as dumb to them as it was to us and they aborted and that was the only way out.

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  126. I HAVE TO ADMIT. I SAW THIS SHOW STONED... AND IT WAS PRETTY ENJOYABLE!

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  127. That's how I watched the entire Attitude Era, imagine how good it was!

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  128. perhaps it would then be advisable to get one or two females who can act and are not screeching harpies.

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  129. I liked most of Raw. I even liked the goofy Vince/HHH stuff this week. If they left it at "Arrive. Screwjob. Leave." it would have been even better. DBry is on fire, the shield is still entertaining and cesaro/cara was great for the time they got. Orton and Kane were good in their matches/segments as well.
    Cena is at 1991 Hogan level now. You can get him all the fresh opponents you can, but it's still the same old shit. Skipped Sheamus and Sandow stuff since it's leading to a 5 minute youtube squash on sunday. The 15 seconds of Del Rio we got was 20 seconds too much. Don't really care for AJ/Kaitlyn but it's better than the Bellas every week.
    The good far outweighed the bad and that's as good as it gets these days.

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  130. Timeline is a great concept but that fucking host is unbearable.

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  131. I have a feeling that the WWE is now going to copy the "Team Hell No!" formula of putting two mismatched wrestlers together and watch the tension and friendship build before they break up in order to build up a wrestler not realizing that it was a very specific character arc that worked for Daniel Bryan but would not necessarily translate to whoever they decide to try that formula with next.

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  132. It's actually called the Booker T & Goldust formula. Thanks.

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  133. You're right about that. I'm calling this now, within six months they are going to put Bo Dallas together with Mark Henry to see if lightning could strike again (it's probably going to bomb because Bo Dallas is nowhere near Daniel Bryan's league in any area).

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  134. Ok, but do you trust WWE to EVER do a good, thoughtful job when they do an angle based on a hot-button issue? Remember Muhammad Hussan, who was going to be an angry American tired of being treated like a terrorist, but who later had a group of masked men attack and carry out the Undertaker, while he prayed? I groaned the first time I saw Hussan, and same thing with Zeb Coulter. Is the Tea Party even a thing anymore?

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  135. They're still a thing. They're trying to get Kane to run for governor of Tennessee. Yes,in real life.

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  136. In 2013 it's a hot story.The tea party is in the news,so WWE's making a story out of it. Noone complains when shows or movies are based on real world headlines.

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  137. We don't know the inside #s of which guy sells more merch (adjusted for # of items of course), so I'm going by crowd pops.


    Cena- have you ever heard Orton get a 60/40 split reaction (often on the negative side) like Cena? Come on, Orton's pops are consistently positive and the volume is about even


    Bryan- not fair to put D-Bry on here, he hasn't been doing it long enough. Orton's been consistently popular for over 3 years. Bryan had a monster couple months last year, and a big month this year. He needs to keep it going (doesn't need to even be at this crazy level, but still solid) and I'll gladly put him ahead of Orton.


    Punk- I'll give him to you.


    HHH- this one is close, and in the case of a tie I give it to the full-time guy who often appears on both shows over the guy who takes months off and gets return pops.


    Lesnar- similar to HHH, it's not fair to put a part-timer on here (it's why I didn't mention Taker in my original comment). Plus since his feud with Cena I don't think Brock's pops have been massive enough to make his part-time status irrelevant.


    Who else is there? Kofi? Sheamus?

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  138. Your_Favourite_AssholeJune 11, 2013 at 12:00 PM

    GLUTES

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  139. Your_Favourite_AssholeJune 11, 2013 at 12:01 PM

    i bet they were tryin to leech off of team hell no heat

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  140. Sean Oliver is at least better than the goof who does the "No Kayfab'n" interviews. That guy always comes off like such a fanboy mark that it makes you wonder how in the hell was he able to get Kevin Nash, Perry Saturn and the like to do interviews with him in the first place.

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  141. We're talking about Daniel Bryan, not Edge.

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  142. I'm the last person to pick nits over star ratings but id have Bryan/Rollins at at least 4.

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  143. Interesting that you get a Daniel Bryan/Seth Rollins match at the show you go to when that was the main event of the ROH show that we both went to.


    Lucky bastard.

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  144. "HHH, you're beating the Hell out of the kid and then he's getting two decisions from the boss? What the hell is that?"
    "THAT'S HOW THE GAME GIVES SOMEONE THE RUB!"

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  145. Weirdest thing live that I did not expect: people doing both parts of the "let's go Cena-Cena sucks". Like, kids in Cena gear would be saying "Let's Go Cena" and then saying the "Cena sucks" part.

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  146. Scream09_HartKillerJune 11, 2013 at 1:14 PM

    I love your avatar.

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  147. Scream09_HartKillerJune 11, 2013 at 1:17 PM

    I don't see how Bret and Owen going long make the Undertaker/Undertaker match worse - it sucked, the quicker the better. But still, a bit unprofessional for him to go into business for himself, although not surprising. Bret knows best. Which is also the name of the reality show he created until that no good stinking Hulk Hogan stole it from him.

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  148. I was just happy to see a heel act like the heel for once.

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  149. Was there live last night, I don't know if some of it was that the crowd was tired after over three hours but Cena got a smaller pop than Daniel Bryan, Orton, and Triple H.

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  150. The only thing that turned Ryback heel was the announcers insulting him.

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  151. Yeah, Punk's not gonna be there.

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  152. Shouldn't that make you see him MORE like a character from It's Always Sunny?

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  153. Agreed.....that was awesome!

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  154. Well at this rate, how long before we see Linda?

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  155. Based on pops, Orton was the second most popular guy last night.

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  156. If they pushed Daniel Bryan like they did Orton (even for one-tenth the time) Daniel Bryan would be nuclear over. It took them five years to get Orton that over. It took Punk ten minutes. Took Daniel Bryan 38 seconds.

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  157. A reality show of the Hart family immediately after Owen's death would have broken the banks.

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  158. Two best actors? Paul Heyman and Punk. Though I have to give Ambrose credit. And Bray Wyatt.

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  159. Dolph Ziggler's first draft promo was: "I stayed at home with a concussion because I'm a queer."

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  160. I don't know man, based on his last few matches I don't want to see him wrestle.

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  161. Maddox is very funny.

    And I say Maddox is the love child of Mac, Dennis, and Charlie. Somehow.

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  162. AJ is also over because she's brutally hot. She looks like she'd be wild.

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  163. Oh, absolutely. You just can't take one city's reaction as the overall reaction for a guy. If that was the case, in some city's you could say that the vast majority of the fans hate Cena when that's not the case.

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  164. YOU DIDN'T RATE ORTON/REIGNS!

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  165. True. But Richmond isn't like Chicago or Philadelphia or a post-Mania crowd. Other than a group of smarks sitting behind me (and me) most people were pretty prototypical WWE fans.

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  166. I think it's more that Daniel Bryan's strength is making stuff look like it has a real impact behind it and Rollins' strength is selling.

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  167. Side note: I finally got my answer why the pops sound different for guys who are supposedly hot. When guys would come out the music would be lower and the volume would come up and then they'd adjust it. So Orton came out to a monster ovation and then his music kicked up and it sounded like fans weren't as enthusiastic but when the music came back down people were still cheering that overrated bastard.

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  168. The tweets that Punk retweets tend to be from illiterate lunatics. The "dye n a CaR crSH!!!!!!!!!!!!" type.

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  169. I'm not accepting boos as a sign a wrestler is "popular".

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  170. Also, did anyone else think it was a little weird that they had the guy who had a heart attack live on air be the one that looked like he was about to make out with a Hardee's Triple Bacon Cheeseburger? Those things should come with a defibrillator anyway.

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  171. what? really?

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  172. Yeah, it was really, really weird. I think it was because of that shirt a while ago.

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  173. So when Flair was the top heel in the NWA, he wasn't popular?

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  174. What the heck, I'll vote for him!

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  175. Guess that's what banging Chyna will do for you.

    OK, I just made myself sick.

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  176. I also agree.


    I'm still really pissed he didn't go 4 on Flair - Austin from 02'.

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  177. What shirt? And BTW I'm not surprised a Cena fan would be dumb enough to cheer for AND against their favorite.

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  178. lol I probably would too,if I lived there.

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  179. Cena gets a mix of cheers and boos. Orton gets a HUGE entrance pop,"R-K-O" chants during the match,a monster pop when he actually does RKO,and then a big pop post match. All without being near a belt. He's the 90's Undertaker of now.

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  180. Will Linda be in the PPV? I mean, she's not running for governor for goodness sake #YouWANTMoreMcMahonsYoullGETMoreMcMahons!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  181. Negative buyrate

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  182. Vine's basically a Twitter product.

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  183. Yeah, I typed that in a different post on this thread. In between pops, it's apathy.

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  184. I don't know, I guess I just see the duffle bag as half full, while you see it as half empty.

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  185. Yeah last year he lost a world title match, got a wwe title match the next night.

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  186. I did it at the Hartford RAW last year. I literally don't give a shit about Cena one way or the other. There may have been adult beverages involved.

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  187. While your idea makes sense, ADR never wanted to be a heel in the first place. So I don't think there's any going back now.

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  188. I have never been an Orton fan either. It was originally because of how hard they pushed him in the early 2000s. Than after I came back after a near 5 year hiatus he still was going over guys I liked (IE Christian. Just as a side note I'd like to point out that now people are saying Christian was never good enough to make it to true main event staus who knows what would have happened if the wwe wasn't pulling out the rug from under him. They did it before he left for tna. Which is why he left in the first place. Than they did it again when he was battling Orton for the World title. He was on a huge hot streak at that point. Plus there was really no need to put Ortono

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  189. The WWE can convince almost anyone that a person should be a main eventer. Orton wasn't over for almost five years but they kept pushing him anyway.

    Granted, there are some things that give guys an advantage because of the nature of wrestling (it's easier to get Ryback over than Daniel Bryan) but it's not impossible.

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  190. They're not going to keep Del Rio a face just because he wants to be a face. Orton and Jericho want to be heels and they're not turning them. If it's the best thing for the company -- and I think they can actually make money off Del Rio as a main-event heel, whereas he's just kinda "there" as a face -- they'll do what they want.
    Does anybody know the story behind Del Rio not wanting to be a heel? Because if he wants to be a face so much, he should bring something interesting to the table instead of just clapping furiously and urging the crowd to cheer him.

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