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Tryout: Kyle Warne

RoH TV: June 9th Edition

Kyle Warne here filling in for Adam Curry as weekly RoH recapper. The show opens on the announce desk with Kevin Kelly and Nigel McGuinness. They explain that RoH hasn’t heard from Corino since “last week” when he threw a bitch fit about Lethal becoming the #1 contender to the TV title. They hype the Wolves vs Briscoes main event.

Out comes Truth Martini with Matt Taven and 2 “Hoopla Hotties” (though I question that description for the chick on the left) and I groan at the prospect of Martini cutting a promo. Truth says he has something to say and the crowd jumps down his throat immediately. He rambles on for a while with the gist being “Lethal sucks.” He then Issues an open proving ground challenge, where should Taven be defeated the man who beats him will receive a TV tittle shot in the future. Personally I love the cocky heel issuing an open challenge angle just to piss himself when the big scary baby face answers, and here comes Ciampa to a monster reaction Pepper Parks to absolute silence. OK then, some jobber half the audience didn’t recognize at first works too, even Kelly doesn’t know who he is referring to him only as “This Man” when he enters. Parks takes the mic from Truth and slanders his “Willy Wonka hat.” Oh, burn—how will Truth ever recover from such nastiness? Parks sucker punches Taven and we head straight into…

Proving Ground Challenge: Pepper Parks VS Matt Taven

Pepper starts on offense until Taven turns it around with an Irish whip into a rebound back body drop. Parks gets up and attempts a suplex, but Taven slips out and drops him and elbows Parks in the mouth. They trade reversals until Parks hits a big knee strike to Taven’s jaw, and then hits the chin lock. Taven fights out but gets caught with a shitty dropkick and Russian leg sweep for 2. Parks runs the ropes and gets a spin kick to the face for his trouble; it gets 2 for Taven. Taven looks to press the advantage but Parks gets a vertical suplex to regain control. He whips the TV champ into the corner but eats boot when he runs in and Parks ends up on the apron. Taven brings him back into the ring with a hangman’s neck breaker and climbs the ropes. Frog splash misses and now its Parks turn to climb the ropes. Taven cuts him off and looks for the Superplex, but Parks reverses it into a sunset bomb from the top. That isn’t enough to beat Taven so Parks scales the ropes one final time. His dive misses the target, and Taven hits his modified DDT finisher for the three count. *1/2 This whole thing was not very good, Truth’s promo skills (or lack thereof) have been well documented by Adam, and Parks seemed off his game tonight, which didn’t help the crowd’s apathy to him.

Rip Impact VS Tommasso Ciampa

Side rant: what the fuck kinda name is RIP IMPACT. So after some great “crazy” mannerisms from The Sicilian Psychopath he agrees to the code of honor. Rip Kicks him during the handshake and the announcers praise his gumption. Ciampa shrugs Impact off and proceeds to beat him down in the corner. Ciampa pulls down the kneepad and gives the seated Impact two running knee strikes. Tommasso loads the poor bastard up for project Ciampa but Rip sweeps the leg and rolls him up for 1. Ciampa gets a lariat for 2. Ciampa picks Rip up into a vertical suplex and holds him in the air for the crowd to count the seconds just like Elgin always does as a challenge, and Elgin comes out to join us as a result. Elgin hops up on the apron as Ciampa follows through with the suplex and starts jaw jacking with him. Rip takes advantage of the distraction to recover and manages to score a half-dozen big kicks on Ciampa in a desperate flurry, then gets a swinging neck breaker. Rip looks to go upstairs but Ciampa cuts him off with a VICIOUS knee strike. Ciampa climbs up and deliver a Celtic Cross off the second rope on Rip to let him R.I.P ** Much better squash then the Taven match, with Impacts offense coming across as nothing more than hopeless desperation against the beast that is Tommasso Ciampa. I’d gone way to long without seeing Ciampa, the guy’s knee strikes look brutal and he shows more intensity then 90% of the RoH roster combined. Ciampa and Elgin are my favourite wrestlers in the company, and their match at Best in the World should be killer.

Next we head inside RoH. A replay Package of Ciampa destroying QT Marshall and RD Evans. Kevin Kelly stresses that Elgin vs Ciampa will be Ciampa’s first PPV match in 10 months. We cut to comments from Elgin. Elgin says that he welcomes Ciampa’s challenge, and that he’d have done the same, picking a fight with the biggest dog in the yard to make an impact. Elgin tells Tommasso he made a mistake, and all he did was insure his return is short lived. Elgin says that “When they said all men are created equal, they were wrong” Adam Cole cuts a promo next on how he’s pissed people are questioning his integrity. He also says he’s realized that winning and losing is all that matters. Steen is the last guy to get time as he talks about what he and Matt Hardy were doing 10 years ago. That Kevin watched Hardy dive through tables ladders and chairs to make a name for himself. Kevin tells Matt he’ll be wishing for TLC, because what he’s going to do to him In Baltimore is far worse than any of that.

We come back from break with S.C.U.M. entering through the crowd. Steve Corino says this company has made nothing but mistake after mistake for 10+ years. Corino says he can forgive the mistake of not giving Matt Hardy the first shot at Jay Briscoe, but draws the line at the “Limey no good piece of Garbage” Nigel McGuinness not including his boys in last week’s #1 contender matches. Things get heated and Nigel ends up nose to nose with Corino. Jay Lethal and C & C run out as reinforcements. Corino draws a chuckle from me and a “that was racist” chant from the crowd for referring to the coalition gathered in front of him as “Ring of Homies”. Corino screams that Lethal lost CLEAN to Jimmy Jacobs and that C & C lost CLEAN to Rhett Titus and Cliff Compton. The man has a good point. Everyone in the ring starts brawling except Corino and Nigel who just stare at each other, security hits the ring to clear it up as we go to commercial. If Nigel is healthy enough to wrestle I’d pay to see it against Corino, they’ve really built things up well between those two.

Jay and Mark Briscoe VS The American Wolves

And with the ring cleared it’s time for our main event with 20 minutes left in the show. The story here is about whether Jay and Mark can get along while they’re feuding. The Wolves have never defeated the Briscoes in a tag team match. Mark and Eddie start the match with some mat wrestling, they just keep countering each other with no one gaining ground until they both pause ready to throw a chop in a humorous spot that gets a good reaction from the live audience. Double tag puts Jay and Davey in. They take turns shoulder blocking each other, but neither guy will go down. Richards breaks the stalemate with a dropkick that knocks Jay right outside the ring. Davey looks for the big dive but gets cut off by a stiff elbow from Jay; he rolls in the ring and tags in Mark, and a double shoulder block takes down Richards. Things break down and everybody’s fighting; Eddie gets a body slam and kick to the back of the head on Mark outside the ring. Edwards throws him back in the ring which gets Richards a 2 count. The Wolves look to double team mark but he rolls through and tags in Jay for the hot tag. Jay cleans house and hits a neck breaker on Richards. Things break down again and both Briscoes end up outside. Davey gets the running kick on the apron, while Eddie wipes out Mark with a suicide dive. Back in the ring the Wolves gang up on Jay, Eddie hits a gourdbuster to set up a Richards dropkick. Eddie rams Jay’s head into Davey’s for the tag as we cut to commercial.

We return with Richards applying the cloverleaf to Jay, Mark breaks it up. Eddie comes in and starts chopping the hell out of Jay’s chest in the corner. Jay escapes a chinchecker attempt then delivers an awesome spin buster and collapses. Both men are down, and we get the double tag. Mark starts whipping Davey around with his Redneck Kung-Fu, but Davey takes control with some kicks in the corner. Crowd chants YES! For every kick, so Davey turns around and yells NO! for a huge reaction from the crowd, the distraction lets Mark take control however. Mark gets a half dragon suplex for 2, then props Davey up on the turnbuckle. Edwards looks to intercept but gets a death valley driver from a newly revived Jay Briscoe instead. Mark slingshots Davey into a super kick from Jay, then lifts him up for the razor’s edge and Jay gives him a neck breaker on the way down. Eddie manages to break up the cover just in time, and then rolls out again. Mark climbs for the Froggy Bow but is stopped by Richards, Jay arrives on the scene however and hoists Davey on his shoulders for the doomsday device. Before Mark can get the diving clothesline he’s Enzugiried by Edwards who came out of nowhere. Davey slips of Jay’s shoulders an falls behind him. Jay then elbows Eddie in front of him, then super kicks Davey behind him, Then he GETS super kicked by Edwards—but he gives him the All-Japan no sell and boots him in the face, but he turns around into a head kick from Davey which sets up a textbook German suplex which Richards rolls into a cross Armbreaker. Things look bleak for Jay, but Mark comes flying through the air with the Froggy bow to break it up. Crowd chants this is awesome, fuck yeah it is—they’re going a thousand miles an hour in there now. Eddie and Mark get into a chop fest until Eddie throws him into the air to eat the alarm clock kick from Richards on the way down. Eddie then kicks Jay’s head off to take him out of the equation. Both wolves get double stops on Mark, but he kicks out at 2. Jay scrapes himself of the floor to distract Davey, while Mark reverses out of a power bomb. (Don’t ask how, shitty camera guy missed most of it) Mark looks to hit Davey with a Dragon suplex, but he lands on his feet—a second attempt puts the former world champ down however. Mark lifts Richards up across his shoulders for a tag team maneuver but Eddie stops Jay. Mark drops Richards to deal with Edwards but punches Jay by accident and sends him to the floor. (all those who didn’t see that coming say aye…really, no one?) Davey takes advantage of a distraught Mark and puts him in position to be tombstoned, Eddie kicks the upside down Briscoe In the head—and then Davey drops him with the pile driver for the win. ***1/2 THANK GOD, The Wolves have used that killer kick/tombstone combo in every match they’ve wrestled since reuniting and it WAS NEVER THE FINISH, even though the match is better if they just let it end there! A great main event with a really hot finish that furthered the ongoing World title feud, I can’t ask for anything else.

A Really good show this week, the first 3rd dragged with Martini poisoning the airwaves, but everything after that was good stuff, Recommended for viewing—especially the main event.

Comments

  1. Good review man. Gladly read again next week.

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  2. Thank You, It was a lot of work, but really fun too

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  3. So let me get this straight. ROH has Lethal and he's a CONTENDER to the TV TITLE??? The guy was horribly misused in TNA...for ROH to do it is criminal.


    And Pepper Parks and Rip Impact are worse names than even WWE writers come up with.

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  4. Parks and Impact aren't ROH guys--just local Jobber guys
    Eh, Lethal makes less sense as World champ then Elgin, Ciampa, or Cole--so I think he's right where he should be--the mid card

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  5. Good job, Kyle. Nice to see that ROH reviews will remain on the blog. Looking forward to read next week's review.

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  6. Thanks, I'm glad I was able to keep these alive

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  7. Amsterdam_Adam_CurryJune 10, 2013 at 8:02 PM

    Great review, Kyle, it's good to see that we'll still see ROH content on the blog. My thoughts on the show:

    Parks/Taven: I liked this match better than you did, Kyle, though my main issue is with the booking. The champ should NEVER win a proving ground match. NEVER. Oh, Truth Martini sucks, and so on...

    Ciampa/Impact: Might be the best squash match I've ever seen. One thing about Ciampa: his entrance is sweet, but unless he's about to get the rocket push they need to upgrade all the top-level guys' entrances too.

    Wolves/Briscoes: Yeah, ***1/2 is about what I'd say.

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  8. Ciampa SHOULD get the rocket push--the guy actually Oozes star quality. I don't know who should win Elgin vs Ciampa at BitW, let alone who WILL win.


    I may have been biased because being there live I thought we were gonna get Elgin or Ciampa or someone awesome for the open challenge and we get PEPPER PARKS--deflated the entire crowd

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  9. Amsterdam_Adam_CurryJune 10, 2013 at 8:08 PM

    I don't understand why they don't sign guys like Pepper Parks, Adam Page, Silas Young, etc... Fans know they're getting squashed but they still get more of a reaction then BJ or QT,,,

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  10. BJ has loyalty points with the company--even if the fans don't give a shit

    QT can leave and no one will care

    I like Page and Young--leave Parks

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  11. Well that changes the BitW card significantly. Makes me more interested too

    http://www.rohwrestling.com/news/corino-gets-his-wish

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  12. Amsterdam_Adam_CurryJune 10, 2013 at 8:44 PM

    That's just bad placement on the card. Taven/Parks as the second or third match on the card? Sure... But that late in the card? Yeah, they can piss off with that shit.

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  13. I don't usually comment on the ROH thread very often, but always read them. Good job for your first time. You'll only get better as you do them more.


    PS Look for Fuj to shit on it. It's kind of an initiation of sorts. ;-)

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  14. I've been waiting for Fuj for a while now--I am ready

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  15. You can't take over the ROH recap spot and not put over upstate NY indie workers, sorry. Its a rule dating back to my days and graciously carried over by Adam.

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  16. Good review. Always glad to see ROH pop up, it comes on overnight here so I "watch" it in the background at work. These usually help me figure out if I need to go back and rewatch anything.


    Tomasso does nothing for me based off of these last two appearances, sorry. I'd rather see Jay Lethal pushed towards the title.

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  17. Haha, sorry about that, I know very little about the New York scene. I know the California and Ontario scenes to a certain extent but that's about it.

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  18. Lethal fans should seek out the matches he had against Ciampa at Boarder Wars and Boiling Point in 2012. Both guys came out of that looking better then ever--and it ENDED Tommaso's undefeated streak

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  19. Somewhat on topic but ROH JUST NOW posted a Tyler Black vs. Bryan Danielson match from May of 2009 on their official youtube page. Talk about being on the ball, good work guys.
    I still can't believe just how good Black became in just a short time period. 3 years in and he had a near 5 star match with Nigel, and true enough McGuinness was amazing but it takes two to tango. Hopefully Black can develop good mic skills but I don't know how you can't improve in that regard hanging around Jon Moxley all the time.

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  20. Could you point out any of these jobbers at an airport?


    I swear ROH has some of the most jobbiest jobbers who ever jobbed from job-town.


    How many people were in attendance not including talent, their parents and the ROH rats (if they even have any?)


    And btw, who would wanna be known to be fucking someone from ROH? Man those rats must have the be the lowest form of skeevy skankiest dirty filthy, just plain yuck whores this side of Buffalo NY.


    "Hey girl you wanna go out and bar hop tonight?"


    "Hell naw ROH is in town. I gotta fuck my man Truth Mancini"


    "Who?"


    "Oh yeah, Truth Martini."


    "Girl.... we gonna get you some counseling."


    Nice review. Keep it up. Hope you survive the experience.

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  21. Are you honestly saying that you wouldn't fuck Matt Hardy if you had the chance?

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  22. I'd fuck MsChif if given the opportunity, even if she looks like the "stab you in your sleep if you don't satisfy her" type.

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  23. Welcome to the big time, Kyle.

    Gotta disagree with Adam further down: Taven could use some wins on TV, plus do we need him losing or drawing to fucking Pepper Parks? I'd rather watch God's Punishment and the Prodigette have a blindfold match.

    SOMEONE TALKED TOMMASSO OUT OF DOING PROJECT CIAMPA! He may have extended his career by a few decades if he's done with the move for good. Although I don't know if I like him being booked with Elgin at the next PPV; if Mike's going to be a world title contender, he needs some PPV wins, and you don't want to job the guy who's just coming back from injury. Why not have Ciampa squash God's Punishment and then see if "Machine Gun" is willing to return the job from a few weeks ago?



    And did anyone not see the ending to the main coming 10 miles away in a thick fog? Job the one team in ROH I like to the sterotypical example of what's wrong with ROH (i.e. nondescript white guys), yay. So if ReDRagon's kick/brainbuster finish is "Chasing the Dragon", the Wolves kick/tombstone finish is......Pack Mentality? Run With the Big Dogs? Bay at the Moon?


    Kinda going a little fast with their big angle, aren't they? SCUM thrown into title matches at their next PPV, then there's that 8-man "SCUM loses and they break up, ROH loses and Nigel loses his job to Corino" match.....we can't spread this out a little? They got time. Don't they? (And we're not getting Nigel v. Corino unless it's a "both guys wear HAZMAT suits" match; Nigel has hep.)

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  24. Rip Impact sounds like a jab at TNA. R.I.P. Impact, that sorta thing.

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  25. She's sort of a "middle class man's" Daffney. To me, at least.

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  26. Daff always seemed a little fragile to me. She looks like she weighs all of 12 pounds.

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  27. I see them dragging the SCUM thing to Final Battle and in the interim a member wins the world title (probably Matt Hardy) and loses it at said event to hopefully Michael Elgin. I wish it wasn't Matt they were so high on though for the title, I'd much rather it be Jacobs or even Rhino. I'm not against Hardy being in ROH, just not as the top title holder.

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  28. Amsterdam_Adam_CurryJune 11, 2013 at 10:17 AM

    What do our whores have to with anything? This show was is Toronto, not Buffalo

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  29. Oh yeah ROH officially fired Jimmy Rave yesterday. Apparently they did think his seizure for drug related but he swears that's not the case. Hope he's OK otherwise.

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  30. She's a biochemist...

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  31. *<------Joke




    O<-----My head

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  32. Proofreading is your friend.

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  33. My point is that she's actually pretty sane by all accounts. She keeps a regular job and separates her personal/professional life from her wrestling life pretty well.


    But yeah, she's one flexible chick, I'd wear her out.

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