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Wednesday, May 23, 2012

A Former Writing Assistant Speaks

Now HERE’S an interesting discussion-starter for people.  Glad it’s from someone who was already fired because whenever I’m contacted by WWE people it’s always “Don’t print this and don’t mention my name or even read it really or I’ll get fired.” 
Hey Scott,
So on the WWE board at GameFaqs.com, there’s a poster who worked as an assistant for the writing team from September to December last year and is giving away some neat insights about the day-to-day workings of the writing process and some tidbits on some of the stars and personalities. It seems legit; the detail of his work was pretty, uh, detailed, and he posted a pic of the office he worked out of and a couple of the one-sheets from the shows. Some of the information is obvious (Cena and Orton have backstage pull on their angles, etc.) but there have some some interesting things he’s revealed (Sheamus was the planned Rumble winner since the previous summer and not a last-second swerve as a result of Chris Jericho, D-Bry being against pairing up with AJ). I’ve gleamed some of the better bits from the topic and thought I’d pass them along since a common cry on the Blog of Doom is “What are they thinking?” And I think it at least beats a fantasy booking e-mail.
I’ve included a lengthy list, so feel free to cherry-pick. If you’re asking why I simply didn’t include a link to said forum, it’s because the WWE board is inaccessible to anyone who doesn’t have enough “karma” built up on the site to keep the trolls out. If this makes for a blog entry, I’d be more than happy to do a follow-up e-mail later on as the topic continues.
--
His duties: 
“Mainly note-taking and updating many documents that helped the writers do their jobs. There was a document that had the last 6 episodes of Raw and Smackdown broken down by segment. Another that listed the ‘Last 5 Times’ something was done (like the belt being used as a weapon, or a chair being used, or interference in a match). That stuff had to be updated every week so the writers could refer to it whenever needed.
There was a ton of word processing basically. Each week to write the shows we would write the numbers 1 to 11 on the board (the segments of the shows) and just discuss the stories and where to put things. Then I or another assistant would create a "one sheeter" out of those. Basically list each segment and a few bullet points of what they would consist of. The writers would then use this as a guideline to write the scripts.
The writing team is divided into a home team that stays in Stamford, and a road team that travels to all the shows. Unfortunately I was on the home team. My only backstage experience was at Survivor Series which was pretty dope.”
--
On who he answered to:
“Probably Brian Gewirtz, who was my true boss. If the writers told me one thing and Brian said another, Brian's word goes. Always.”
--
On scripting promos and on-the-fly changes:
“Cena has been known to throw the script out and do his own thing on occasion. I'm sure Punk does occasionally. Ziggler has gone off script a time or two and was reprimanded for it. It's hard to tell for me because the writing process is sort of an assembly line. We wrote the outline and first drafts of the script in Stamford after approval by Vince, then they'd go to the head writers and always through at least three more drafts. Then there'd be another meeting with Vince on location at the arena the morning of every show. More changes are made. Then there's last minute changes that are made with so little notice that they don't even have time to be put down on paper. Then of course someone may go out in front of the crowd and forget part of their lines, or choose to improvise for whatever reason. But the bulk of that happened outside of my view. So most times the Raw that aired monday was very different than the one that left the offices the week before, and I didn't always know where the changes occurred.”
On backstage pull:
“About as much input as you would expect. Orton, Punk and especially Cena have a lot of say in their stories I think. After Survivor Series, Cena felt he shouldn't lose clean again (or preferably at all) until Wrestlemania, and so he didn't. When Jericho was in talks of coming back, it was under the conditions that he work with Punk and put him over at Wrestlemania (Jericho's demands, not WWE's). He also came up with the light bright jacket thing and paid for it himself (I heard $10g for the first one). Cody Rhodes said in a recent interview that he had his leather vest cape thing custom made and paid for it himself, so I guess to a certain degree the wrestlers are responsible for their own characters. But on the other hand, Daniel Bryan complained a lot about being put into a story with AJ because his last girlfriend storyline with Gail Kim was so bad, but he couldn't really do anything about it.
So I guess you could say it varies quite a bit.”
--
On the tag and Divas divisions:
“The thing with Vince is he goes through these weird and seemingly random phases. For a while he'll be into the tag division, then he couldn't care less. He'll want to do Diva storylines, then he doesn't care if they make it on the show at all. He'll hire someone like Tamina and not do crap with them for years, then one day ask "Why aren't we doing anything with Tamina Snuka? She's a Snuka goddammit!" and Tamina will get a random push.
Right now I guess he's in the mood for some attention on the tag division.”
--
On HHH and Stephanie:
“Triple H is super cool. I actually met him in the men’s room. While he was washing his hands I nervously introduced myself and he took a second to stop, look me in the eye, say good to meet you and make sure he got my full name right. Also from my understanding he was the voice of reason that would reel in many of Vince's crazy ideas in the meetings.
Steph is very nice also, but does have a tendency to stare at you in a sort of psychotic-looking manner. But she's friendly and jokes around and tries to know everyone's name. 
They're just normal people really.”
--
On the anonymous GM:
“There were a few directions they were considering. The obvious one being Vince, but they also were heavily considering JBL. But Vince killed the story. In fact at one point when the head writers pushed him to at least tie up the loose end some how, Vince suggested to reveal that it was Laurinaitis all along in a "throwaway line backstage."
The whole thing was dropped though. When Vince stops caring about something, it's dead.”
--
On FCW:
“Sure there was a booklet that had bios of the "top talent" of FCW. We would also get weekly FCW DVD's of the latest show which were available for whoever had time to watch them, but any decisions as far as new talent debuts or anything like that were done by Talent Development, which Triple H is in charge of together with Matt Martolaro, former FCW announcer.
But on occasion we would have a task like "We need a list of the top 5 choices for names for Donny Marlow." And we discussed as a group and put our favorites on the board. They had to be cleared by the legal team to make sure we could trademark them. Marlow and Hunico themselves liked Camacho best, so Camacho it became.
I remember seeing paperwork for Ryback 's debut plan. It included the design of his attire as well as storyboards for his vignettes, but I guess they decided not to do the vignettes.
That's the thing about the place, and about TV in general I guess, it's so so SO fluid. Things change constantly and at last minute and you have to learn to just go with it.”
--
On Punk at Survivor Series: 
“I can tell you a CM Punk story from Survivor Series. Punk was warming up because his match was coming up soon. He was jogging in place and such backstage psyching himself up. MSG is a relatively small arena backstage, so things were a bit cramped. About 20 feet away Miz and Truth were about to pre-tape their backstage interview with Matt Striker (who btw purposely opens his stance up so he's shorter than the people he interviews).
The PA asked everyone to quiet down so Miz and Truth could record there thing. It's at this moment that Punk starts doing box jumps. While everyone else is silent, he's jumping loudly on and off a storage crate. The PA comes over and says something like "I'm sorry Punk but we're trying to tape this thing. Could you please keep it down?"
Punk says nothing, continues jogging in place but turns over to Miz and Truth and flips them off.
I think he was just joking around, but he did seem like kind of a douche.”
--
On Kane’s re-masking and feuding with Cena instead of Henry:
“From what I can recall, though Kane was taken out by Mark Henry, Glenn Jacobs did not want to come back and feud with him for whatever reason. So they instead had him return on RAW and go after Cena, though I think it was already planned when he was written off with the broken ankle that he would come back with the mask.
However the design of the outfit, as well as the look and filming of the vignettes teasing his return were both done by other departments and had nothing to do with the writers. We were as anxious to see what he would look like when he returned as everyone else.”
--
On the Natalya Neidhart “farting” gimmick:
“We used to make fun of Natalya a lot because from what we heard she had kind of an eccentric personality. It was in good fun though and not malicious, but at some point the "Nattie Neidfart" joke came up and we had a good laugh talking about stupid stuff like changing her move to the "shartshooter." Several weeks later when I was already fired and the story actually made it to TV my jaw dropped and I cracked up. You'd be surprised how much stuff is done just as a rib on people.”
--
On Daniel Bryan:
“Everyone knew that DB would not hold the briefcase until Wrestlemania. I don't know why that became part of his story, but likely it was a promise he could break later to facilitate a heel turn. I heard that Bryan winning MitB was actually a last minute same-day decision. From what I could tell, nobody had much faith in Bryan as a draw while he was a face. Bryan almost had to turn heel, because he wasn't very good at giving face promos. When he first won the championship and started cutting promos still as a face, he would emphasize the wrong parts and say things in the wrong tone. It actually came out kind of obnoxious and heelish, which probably encouraged the decision to turn him. However when he became champion, Vince and the writing team wanted to do a very "sophisticated" and slow-burn gradual heel turn which obviously worked wonderfully. I think they had a lot of fun with that story. I remember something in the notes that came in once that said something like 
* From now on, when Daniel Bryan wins any match he should celebrate like it's the biggest victory of his life
This is was when he was right in the middle of the gradual heel turn and that's where YES! was born.”
--
On Nash/Punk/HHH:
“It was Nash not being medically cleared to compete by the time he was supposed to face Punk. The writers had to scramble and think of a reason to stall the story, and then it became Kevin Nash vs. Triple H. Again the story took on a life of its own and they had to go through with the feud, even though it was pretty clear Nash had nothing to offer. Instead of Big Daddy Cool, he was screaming all of his promos. His ring abilities were shoddier than ever. So it was decided Nash and Trips would have one blow off match and we'd be done with Kevin Nash on the show. Punk vs. Nash almost happened on RAW a few times, just to tie up the loose end, but I think they didn't want Nash competing a big match before his match with Triple H so it never happened.”
--
On Brodus Clay’s gimmick change:
“The whole writing team was under the impression that Brodus would come back as the monster heel depicted in the vignettes. It was Vince who saw things differently. When the vignettes were already airing and the writing team asked him when they should debut Brodus, Vince said something like "What's his character? We don't have anything for him. I don't understand who Brodus Clay is. Let's hold off on his debut until we have a better idea." 
Backstage it was well known that Brodus has a lot of charisma, loves kids and is a great talker. Vince decided he wanted Brodus as a face, and for some reason, despite Brodus having no dancing ability, he wanted Brodus to dance.
They worked on the gimmick for weeks, mainly down in FCW (as dark segments I assume). All of it was completely out of the writers hands and was probably handled by Talent Development instead. The reason his debut was teased so much was because at first we thought he was ready, then Vince would decide he isn't ready yet. His ring work isn't up to par, or the choreography isn't good enough, or the outfit needs work still, or the whole production needs more time, or the timing is off. All kinds of stuff like that.
When Brodus finally debuted, the writers came into work the next day and the reaction was as mixed as it was [on the IWC]. Some thought it was cheesy and a disaster, some thought it was fun and entertaining, some thought it just needed time to get over.
In the end, it was a way more fun and original idea to make him the Funkasaurus than generic monster heel #622978 I think.
Although admittedly after a while we had Laurinaitis tease Brodus's debut just to get him heat. There was an idea that Brodus would debut as a monster, but then turn on Laurinaitis and break out the dancing character. Or that Laurinaitis would be under the impression that he was bringing in a monster, only to be dismayed when Brodus shows up dancing. There were a few possibilities, but they ultimately decided to drop Brodus and Johnny's connection all together.” 
--
On Zack Ryder’s depush:
“I didn't feel that the writers had anything against Ryder really. I think Gewirtz feels that he's a natural underdog, and that's why people like him. The moment you give him too much exposure or success, he's no longer an underdog and becomes annoying so they try to stick to that.
Any personal feelings that stop someone from getting more success probably come from Vince himself. Absolutely no major plot points, no title wins or face/heel turns get on TV without Vince's approval.”
--
On planning for the Royal Rumble:
“The winner is determined months in advance usually, but it's always subject to change. The way they usually book is that they set up the main events for PPVs all the way from now until next Wrestlemania. They then work backwards between PPVs to develop the storylines on RAW and SD. There's a document that charts the main events, but a lot of the stuff ends up changing. When I flipped through this document in September, Sheamus was already scheduled to win the Rumble, but he was also supposed to take on Mark Henry for the WHC at Wrestlemania. But things happen. Henry got injured and had to drop the title, Bryan cashed in and became a phenomenon, etc. Del Rio was supposed to take on Orton, but he got injured as well. Sin Cara and Mysterio, same deal. So most of the stuff they had planned did not actually come to fruition. And even before the Rumble there was lots of consideration about making the winner Jericho instead since they knew they wanted Jericho to take on Punk at Wrestlemania. I think ultimately it was decided that Sheamus needs a Rumble victory more than Jericho, and Jericho could get to Wrestlemania by other means.
As for the specifics, Michael Hayes does most of it with some of the agents. They plan the list of participants, then work on the order and some of the big spots. The reason it was 30 people and not 40 again this year was because the roster was so thin because of so many injuries. Hell even with 30 they had to resort to guys like Jey Uso and Michael Cole.”
--
On Sheamus as the next Cena and a Cena heel turn:
“Sheamus is being built as the next John Cena. Which is a good thing, because it will free up Cena to do other things in the future, like turn heel. Kids love Sheamus. He moves merch. He's good at press appearances and talk shows and junk. He's the best possible candidate to replace Cena as the top babyface.  As far as the man personally, I don't remember hearing anything interesting. He's just a loyal hardworking guy. Last I heard he wanted to add a cloverleaf as another finishing move.
From what I've heard, Cena would LOVE to turn heel. The Thuganomics character was a lot more like his real persona, and I know he feels limited by being a face. It's the company and Vince that doesn't want to take the leap until they have an established replacement for him, which is most likely Sheamus. It's not just the show itself, but they need someone that can do all the Make A Wish stuff, the PR appearances, the sponsorships, etc that Cena does. Cena works his ass off for the company, and nobody else even comes close right now. So there's a lot of things lost in turning him heel.”
--
On the planning process from September onward:
“Tough question to answer. Like I said they had a very skeleton idea of the major feuds and matches all the way through to Wrestlemania. They always work backwards from the PPV card to book the Raws and Smackdowns in-between, so they always know what the end goal is. As far as specifics of matches and promos, that's usually a week by week basis, with the team planning one week ahead of real time. Some feuds that were story-heavy, like Cena vs. Kane, would sometimes have "grids" which is basically a chart with four columns representing the four weeks until the next PPV. Writers were encouraged to work in that grid style, keeping in mind how one week relates to the next, rather than winging it week by week.”
--
On the sanitized TV-PG product:
“A lot of the restrictions nowadays are not so much about PG vs Non-PG but because the world has gotten more aware and more critical about health and sports as a whole. For example, whereas blood was rampant in the Attitude era, now if someone bleeds they practically stop the match and have a cut doctor with gloves work on them. This is not because of PG, but because of higher concerns over hepatitis and things like that that are tied to legal issues about workplace risks and red tape like that. Same goes for chair shots to the head. Has nothing to do with PG, but with society up in arms about concussions and life threatening head injuries in the NFL and anywhere else.
However PG was a roadblock on a few occasions. For example in the Cena vs. Kane story, we were told that lighting anyone on fire was not PG and was not a possibility, and even lighting any THING on fire was unlikely to be approved. When you're dealing with a Kane story that's kind of a kick in the balls.”
--
On the writers as a group:
“The writers are a lot like [the IWC]. They want stories to be entertaining, deep, and make sense. But sometimes their plans are derailed by what Vince wants to do. Sometimes they're so busy working on the main storylines that the midcard guys like Primo and Epico fall through the cracks without having a storyline for weeks. They're doing their best. And I believe Vince has always been the way he is.
You gotta realize that Vince has lived and breathed this company for 30 years. It's all he thinks about, so he's a very unusual guy and very disconnected from the "real world." He has no time to watch TV. He has no idea whats going on in pop culture. He's never seen most major movies of the last 40 years that everyone has seen. Like I remember making a reference to The Shining, and Brian Gewirtz said "I can guarantee you that Vince has never seen The Shining." He has to have other people explain these things to him because all he knows is the WWE.”

Part two:  http://www.rspwfaq.net/2012/05/behind-scenes-at-wwe-part-deux.html

146 comments:

  1. Damn, Scott, that was fast! I sent this to you only like 10 minutes ago! Thanks for posting it, I hope people find some interesting nuggets in it.

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  2. That Punk story is pretty hilarious and sounds completely in character for him to do.

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  3. Wow, absolutely fascinating, especially the stuff at the end about Vince living in his bubble.

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  4. Thank you for sending the e-mail as it's very fascinating.  Would the people from that forum know you by your real name? You mentioned something about needing good karma just to access the forum in the first place and I don't know if others on the board might think this was bad karma or something.

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  5. Sheamus is the next Cena? Fuuuck...Great insight though.

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  6. It's not actual "karma", it's a points system that moves you up different user levels the longer you're a part of the GameFAQs message boards (a point for each day you have an active post). I have about 2,000+ worth of "karma"; you only need like 30 to be allowed to post on the WWE board, which is one of the most popular boards on the site. I was reading through that topic and felt compelled to re-post some of what he was posting here because I figured you guys would get a kick of it.

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  7. Thanks for sharing!

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  8. Excellent read, alot of the things that I've always wondered(Cena turning heel, Blood, Brodus Clay) have now been cleared up. Alot of things make sense now. 

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  9. Great read, if the emailer is still here PLEASE! MORE OF THIS!  I would have loved that scene where Laurinitus has Punk right where he wants him after getting mauled by Henry etc and debuts his new monster to take the title, and then Clay just dances his way to a countout.

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  10. SasukespecialmanMay 24, 2012 at 12:30 AM

    It's really interesting reading about the general personality of the writers. For some reason, it doesn't surprise me that they come off better here than most of us imagine they would. We kind of have an image of a bunch of soap opera writers getting their storylines by reading articles in TV Guide - well, the first three sentences of articles in TV Guide. It also isn't surprising that it is more the general apparatus of the writing system - scheduling, long term plans, Vince's whims, politiking, etc. - that seems to prevent their ideas from reaching their potential. It really feels like the whole thing needs to be scaled down a lot and the bureaucracy simplified. If they don't, Max Weber might come back from the dead and hunt Vince down...

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  11. Incredibly fascinating. One of the best posts Scott Keith has put on the Blog of Doom. Cheers!

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  12. Really, really interesting stuff.

    Yet again the main thing I get from this is that Vince himself is the biggest impediment to a better structured, more entertaining product.

    It's not that you can't get good things when a show-runner interferes in the micro detail, Matthew Weiner is fairly notorious for nitpicking at everything on Mad Men. The difference is that he's working with a very clear plan and idea of what he wants the show to be. Vince seems to make arbitrary decisions and snap judgements and that is always going to result in a disjointed end product

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  13. There's still some more I haven't used, but I made sure to use the most interesting stuff here. The topic over at GFaqs is starting to die down, so maybe in the next day or two, I'll have a follow-up. He had some nice things to say about Vince and Ace in the brief times he met them.

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  14. FIRE ME!?  I"M ALREADY FIRED!

    Of course, he never explained the one thing that I wanted to know most, what he did to get fired.

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  15. THAT'S IT. I'M DONE WITH WRESTLING.

    FROM NOW ON, I'M ONLY GOING TO DEVOTE MY TIME TO THE WORLD BODYBUILDING FEDERATION.

    WHERE IS GARY STRYDOM'S NUMBER, DAMN IT.

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  16. Yeah, he cast the writers and HHH/Steph in a pretty good light and that the writers are more smark than the IWC would believe. I told him it was cool that for as much as we want to vilify the showrunners, it was nice to hear they're more grounded than that and the writers not completely different than us.

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  17. This is what he had posted on it:

    Honestly I wasn't very good at the job. I made a lot of mistakes and they have extremely high standards, especially for such a desirable position. The deal was I was sort of a temp for three months before I became a full term employee with benefits and all that. At the end of my temp period I was told that though I had improved some, it was ultimately not enough and they wanted to go separate ways.Though it was a fun job, it was also ridiculously stressful. It was not something you could check out of at 5pm. There were many nights I was there till 9pm or 10, before my one hour commute home, and still had things to do when I got home. It was a 24/7 job and I was really relieved when I was let go.

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  18. He also added this during another reply:

    "
    I was scolded about boring stuff. Like I said I wasn't very good at the job and made lots of little mistakes, like missing things in the notes or forgetting to send emails or sending them to the wrong person, etc. It's a very very detail oriented position and I'm not a very detail oriented person. In my eyes, if you get from point A to point B, who cares about how you got there, but WWE has a very specific and strict way of doing things that they expect you to adhere to. Little things like the formatting of documents. Writing "Segment One" instead of "Segment 1" and things like that."

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  19.  Just what this board needed!

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  20.  LOL, CrankyVince invades Scott's blog.

    Better dust off those WBF jumpsuits

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  21. that guy comes across like a total douchebag - and a mark.

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  22. this. Weiner is said to be a total control freak but the difference is that his show has a clear direction.
     

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  23. I REMEMBER THAT OUTFIT. FUCKED MANY FAT WOMEN IN IT.

    FUCK BRITA TOO. I WAS QUESTIONING WATER BEFORE ANYONE WAS.

    TAKE A LOOK AT THE MARCH 1992 ISSUE AND SEE FOR YOURSELF. ALSO, TAKE A LOOK AT EDDIE ROBINSON'S DEVELOPMENT, IF YOU WOULD!

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  24. I've actually found myself reading this a couple of times, as i'm always a fan of behind the scenes stuff.

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  25. Actually think Sheamus much more. Dont know if he'll reach Cena heights as the guy has been SuperCena for about 8 years now but I find Sheamus much more credible as a larger than life hero.

    Im glad someone like Orton or the Miz arent being groomed to replace Cena allegedly but these are just my subjective tastes.

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  26. Not trying to be a dick, but, is it really any surprise the guy wasnt made permanent following his temp period? Making lots of little mistakes isnt really conducive to making it in corporate America, as he fully admits.

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  27. This is an interesting read.

    One thing I am trying to coalesce is his insistence that the writing is fluid and everchanging yet they have a plan for what happens months out ; I especially found the Sheamus RR win being planned-in-advance-way-out to be interesting. Many thought it was a swerve but looking back he was looking pretty strong leading up (albeit against midcarders) and it made for a great "slight swerve" if you will.

    We oftentimes complain on the blog that WWE doesnt know where theyre going and its a bit of a clusterfuck from week to week. But maybe it is pretty difficult to set a general endpoint and work every week to get to the destination 1,2, or even 6 months out.

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  28. I will say, changing the move to the "Shartshooter" would've definitely saved Nattie's gimmick in my book.

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  29. At least he's honest about it.  Sounds like he's a genuine fan who thought that it would be cool to be a part of the magic, then found out that he's just not cut out for it.

    I don't suppose that everyone who enjoys going to DisneyWorld would cut it as a Cast Member either.

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  30. Seriously.  Loving something and being good at it are totally different.

    I love music, I am in no way qualified to be at all involved with anything relating to the creation of music.

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  31. It was an interesting read, no doubt. I do wonder, however, with so many writers and levels of people working on stories, why there is no 'plan B' in place for the long run when those fluid situations come up? Why is there not an 'oh shit' button to press when something goes horribly, horribly wrong?
    I think that a lot of complaints on the blog can be traced to exactly that. A lot of the problems with WWE booking is that there isn't a plan in place to handle the type of emergency situation that comes up when someone gets injured, or there's a forced vacation necessary, such as wellness violations. 

    For instance, he brings up Bryan's heel turn. Well, I would hope they were pleased with that story, because it was a good story and we all liked it. I can't remember much complaint about how Bryan's turn was handled; I actually remember quite a lot of praise for it. It's when guys like Henry get injured for example, when booking on the fly is required, that it seems like WWE doesn't have a plan in place to cover it. I don't think that's really a huge leap either - figure out who is next in the pecking order, and simply slide them into the top spot by making feuds fluid and able to be combined, shortened, or lengthened as appropriate. 

    I'd like to ask this question of all the readers on this blog, and I mean it sincerely: Is it a good idea, knowing how volatile the wrestling landscape can be, to be booking a full year of stories in advance? Should shorter booking periods, such as booking around the 'big 4' be considered instead, thereby making sure that we're not laying groundwork for a story that won't have a conclusion? I know that we all want great stories from the fed, it just seems that trying to book the entire company a year in advance, without knowing injury situations, fan reactions, etc, is less desirable than booking 3 months at a time, and concentrating on that period exclusively to deepen the work they're doing and the product we're watching.

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  32. I also am a fan of the behind the scenes aspect of professional wrestling...I mean sports entertainment. All kidding aside I found this to be a really interesting look into method behind the madness of the WWE creative process.

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  33. I'd be interested in knowing why you feel that way as well. He just sounds like someone who enjoyed his experience, but recognized he just wasn't cut out for it in the long haul.

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  34. So with the recent Big Show turn that everyone saw coming and news that Sheamus was penciled in to win the Rumble months out (which anyone watching his "Goldberg"-esque run late last year could tell) can we officially put to bed the theory that if the internet guesses it, Vince changes the plans? It seems that these 'reports' that come out (Jericho was supposed to win the Rumble but they're mad the IWC guessed it) are designed to work us up and get us talking/bitching.

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  35.  Alright, props for the Brita comment. That was fucking hilarious. One of those lines I'd wish I thought of, dammit.

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  36. I still have working for the WWE, or even TNA on my bucket list. This just furthers that want. It sounds like it would be a lot of fun, although It'd be really, really hard for me to control my inner mark.

    I'd probably be fired in about a week after people got tired of hearing Triple H come into a room and say

    "What the FUCK is with this Caliber guy? This is the 8th time he's asked me to Pedigree him. Also, I'm pretty sure I saw him last week wearing the crown I wore at WM22..."

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  37. I found this to be a very informative and a nice sneak peek into the crazy world of WWE Creative.  I always enjoy hearing and reading about the things that are going on behind the scenes and this was one of the most detailed recent accounts I can recall.  After reading it I can believe that Vince operates inside a bubble, but it seems strange to imagine someone being so isolated from the pop culture in the world around them.

    I also found it interesting that Sheamus is being positioned as the next John Cena.  I guess I can sort of see it and he certainly has the backing needed (HHH) to receive the superpush. 

    Like some others have said I would love to have the opportunity to work for creative at WWE or even TNA, but the workload seems a lot more demanding than I'd be willing to put up with and I dont' think I'd last long.  Since it's never going to happen I really enjoy reading these behind the scenes stories, so I can imagine what it would be like...good or bad.  I'd definitely be interested in seeing more topics like these being discussed.

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  38. Very interesting read.  It does seem like Vince himself comes across as the "villain."  His whims are an impediment, or at least that's how I would interpret it.  The one thing I'm glad to see is the mention of how involved a Cena heel turn would be.  One of the absolute best parts of Bischoff's book was when he quoted Hogan's reluctance at turning heel.  It ISN'T just about creating a more interesting character.  You are disappointing all the 8 year olds and the make a wish kids.  And that's a big deal.  And unlike Hogan in WCW, Cena is doing a shitload more PR stuff.  So yeah, I hope everyone remembers this, in addition to the shitload of merchandise he sells and Vince's fear of risk in a post 2005 world, the next time we want to bitch about why Cena isn't turning heel. 

    Not surprised about Steph and HHH either.  Guys like Jericho, Foley, Rock, etc. have nothing but nice things to say about Steph.  Her view of the business may not be the same as yours or mine, but she's always come across to me as likable and during 2000-2001 she was by far the hottest "diva" in the WWE.  I can totally see HHH being the voice of reason when Vince goes off the rails.  he's got a great mind for the business, even if he uses it selfishly way too often, and he can  feel more comfortable standing up to Vince than probably anyone else, including Gerwitz or Dunn (is he still around?) or others. 

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  39. I'm only wondering why he got fired. 

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  40. Cool read.  I drove past Titan Tower last week and still geek out like I'm seeing the castle at Disney or something.  "That's where the magic happens"  It must be weird to be a fan, yet work in an office setting where you can just bump into HHH in the men's room. 

    Sheamus is like a negative image Hogan -pale skin/dark mustache vs. tan skin/blond mustache.

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  41. I've been saying for years that I think Vince's removal from WWE would be the best thing for their company. And I hate saying that because if it wasn't for Vince, we wouldn't HAVE a WWE.

    But he's clearly not right for the product anymore. He changes things on his own whim, despite all the build-up or ideas that the writers might have. He's clearly not in a good state of mind anymore (or at least consistently good state of mine) and it's starting to show more and more. I remember a house show report where Vince came out of nowhere during a regular, mid-card, one-on-one match and decided right there and then they were going to have a Diva's bra-and-panties contest or something. And then there was the pirate gimmick with...crap, I'm blanking on his name...and Vince pulled the plug because he hadn't seen or heard of Pirates of the Caribbean.

    It's just too bad that Vince doesn't realize that the best thing for the business would be for him to step down entirely. Then again, he'd probably go insane, not knowing what to do. On the other hand, he'd have 40 years of movies to catch up on.

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  42. Or completely out of "character" and more in line with real life.

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  43. Vince really needs to take ADD medicine or something. 

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  44.  Yes, it is a good idea to have a plan for a year in advance and the flexibility to change it as needed. What is a bad idea is to drop things with no explanation, such as the anonymous GM, just because the boss "lost interest."

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  45. Check out Brian Kendrick and Paul London's Excellent Adventure, if you liked this read. It's a cool shoot interview, and the former tag champs talk a lot about Vince, Benoit and the Creative team among other things.

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  46.  "He's never seen most major movies of the last 40 years that everyone has seen."

    I'm not sure about this one. I remember a Wrestling Observer podcast interview with one of the old writers, I think Court Bauer, who said Vince has a tradition of going to the movies (or maybe watching a movie in a home theater type thing) every Wednesday afternoon or something. And he actually came up with the Burchill gimmick after seeing Pirates of the Caribbean. It died because like most things with Vince, he loved the idea at first and then forgot about it.

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  47. No hair on top to excessive hair on top.

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  48.  I believe it was a Rhyno/Tajiri match that Vince stopped during the house show. I know Rhyno was in it for sure. As for the pirate, that was Paul Burchill along with the stunning Shelly Martinez as his buxom wench. I loved that gimmick, it was so cool and fun. Besides Paul did the Johnny Depp mannerism perfectly.

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  49. Not to rain on the parade...but are we sure this guy is legit? He gives a very specific time frame that he works and specific reasons for not being hired after his time as a temp ran out. I don't think it would be hard to figure out who he was. And he almost certainly signed a non-disclosure agreement. Seems like WWE could sue his ass off if they were so inclined. Even if it wasn't justified they would know their legal machine could overwhelm him. Why would someone take that risk just to satisfy some fans on a messageboard? Makes me wonder if we should trust this...

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  50. Wow, I found it real interesting that Sheamus had been booked to win the rumble since last summer. I remember when he turned face on Mark Henry I was thinking, "ok, Henry wins the belt from Orton, then Sheamus is gonna win the rumble & be the guy to finally take him down at WM.," and that was actually what they were gonna do! It just makes me very happy that there was some actual foresight to it all, and it got messed up b/c of injuries.

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  51.  not sure that temp production assistants sign non-disclosure agreements.  And if he did, what has he disclosed?  Is their a single trade secret in there that TNA could steal?  Book ahead?  Sheamus may be the next Cena?  Non-disclosure agreements generally are for people higher up and they are in regards to intellectual property.  If he was coming out and giving trade secrets and sharing formulas for coke or new drugs, but giving some fairly generic info on WWE?  doubtful any court would waste it's time.

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  52. I guess that's what has happened since Vince has no competition anymore. As the only real game in town, he has no desire to listen to others like he did in the Attitude Era.

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  53. Even if they don't want to turn Cena heel because of the sick children (which is a good reason, don't get me wrong), he still doesn't need to be THE focal point of the show so much, especially when his angles are terrible and his non-wrestling performances are so atrocious. His presence can be reduced to give others a bit of shine.

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  54. exodus316 exodus316May 24, 2012 at 9:40 AM

    I liked hearing that Sheamus is the guy planned to replace Cena and that there is a PLAN to replace Cena.  Lot of interesting tidbits.  Great read.

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  55. What I really want to know is if they have discussed completely ending brand extension and merging titles???

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  56. From what I've heard, Cena would LOVE to turn heel. The Thuganomics
    character was a lot more like his real persona, and I know he feels
    limited by being a face. It's the company and Vince that doesn't want to
    take the leap until they have an established replacement for him, which
    is most likely Sheamus. It's not just the show itself, but they need
    someone that can do all the Make A Wish stuff, the PR appearances, the
    sponsorships, etc that Cena does. Cena works his ass off for the
    company, and nobody else even comes close right now. So there's a lot of
    things lost in turning him heel.”


    But didn't Cena himself recently say that he would fight turning heel as much as he could...?

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  57. “The writers are a lot like [the IWC]. They want stories to be
    entertaining, deep, and make sense. But sometimes their plans are
    derailed by what Vince wants to do.


    The contrast in this sentence is the most awesome thing ever.

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  58. And if you read Meltzer's lengthy recap of all the event leading up to Montreal, part of it details how Vince was going to be incommunicado for a few hours when it got down to the wire for Bret's contract b/c he and Linda were going to a movie.

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  59. "Hunter, to make matters worse, someone saw him exercising the gym wearing nothing but your skull mask from WM a few years ago."

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  60. This guy is bs'ing you. Nothing he states there couldn't have been made up by any halfway creative person based on stuff that others have said previously, plus some of what he says seems to contradict what others who were known writers with WWE have said. Not saying the guy might not have worked there but he's obviously at the least "embellishing" some stuff here.  Interesting and entertaining, but take it with a grain of salt.

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  61. I had a feeling that they were trying to make Sheamus the next Cena. Ever since his face turn, he turned into the same smiling, don't ruffle any feathers, douchebag that Cena is.

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  62. Well keep in mind that most of the guys on Twitter who are former writers, in most cases, haven't worked for WWE in a number of years.  I'm not sure their insight into the current workings of WWE can be used to contradict what this person claims.

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  63. This was a terrific post, thank you so much for posting this.

    And I definitely believe the part about Vince not seeing any movies, considering that way back in 1999, he killed off Stevie Richards and The Blue Meanie's "Blair Witch Project" spoof because he had never heard of the film and he therefore assumed the audience had never heard of it either, nevermind the fact that it was the most successful horror film of that decade.

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  64. I don't think so.  In an interview he did either right before or right after WrestleMania he straight out said, at the very least, that he would love for the show to no longer be PG so that he could let loose and be edgier.  Based on those comments, I got the sense that he wouldn't have any problem turning heel -- again, as long as there was somebody to take his place.

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  65. Assuming this guy is legit for the sake of argument...

    Cm punk and cena are running the hottest angle since the nwo, that brings back old fans, leads to legit mainstream attention vince craves (cm punk was on the bs report and they added the masked reviewer to grantland etc) and the company is on fire. So huntor and nash (Kevin nash who was washed up 9 years before and was working in fucking tna right before) interjected themselves into the angle because why???? And we nash was sucking so bad that wwe creative allowed him to get the best of their hottest property in years (nash always got the best in physical confrontations and never let pn

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  66. exodus316 exodus316May 24, 2012 at 10:20 AM

    I'm curious about this myself.

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  67. You make a valid point. However, things have run basically the same in WWE for years. Not much changes. I say that based on statements made by writers, superstars,etc. many of whom still work with the company. It's not like there's been a revolutionary shift in the way things are done creatively. Also, look at minor inconsistencies in, for example the Brodus Clay bit, where his version doesn't quite match what Brodus, Brain James (Road Dogg), etc. have said happened. No big discrepencies just little stuff. This is why I say it's "possible" the guy is who he says he is but if so he seems to be taking some creative license with the facts to make it seem that he knows more than he does. Which should not be too surprising since everyone wants to be an expert whether they are or not. And I could be wrong but again, his words ring a little false based on what others who aren't anonymous have said.

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  68. I think its legit. If you noticed he was an assistant writer so he was pretty low on the totem pole and probably wasn't privy to a lot of information. Plus it coincides with some stuff I've read from other writers.

    If I could link to an interview with another writer who was higher upset the food change it gives a similar but yet different view than this guy. The writer in this interview worked from 05-07 so its a little dated but you still see some similarities. How people perceive HHH and Steph is always interesting.

    Plus you'll notice how Vince had the same storyline for Bryan as champ as he did for Rey Mystreo. Because in Vince's brain if your under a certain height you could never be a real champion. Its worked much better with Bryan because he's played into it so well and he's always been treated as a joke anyway. Whereas with Rey, he was a well established guy and it was really just an insult. Anyway here the link:

    http://www.wrestlinginc.com/wi/news/2012/0326/551045/alex-greenfield/index.shtml

    This assistant guy is no where near as bitter. Plus he seems like he still has the mark attitude a fan would. And I don't mean that as a diss but you can tell just how he marked out by HHH saying hi to him says it all.

    But it's still a good read and really informative.

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  69. How exactly were the Misterio/Bryan champ storylines the same? Seemed pretty different to me, especially considering one was a heel/turning heel and one was a babyface.

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  70. Read that interview I linked. That writer said the same thing about Rey's reign as this guy said about Bryans. At least in Vince's eyes. That they should act like every victory is the greatest thing that ever happened and they can't possible believe they are champion.

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  71. Good lord, that Natalya part literally made me angry. 

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  72. And yet Vince never heard of Scarface, and thought Scott Hall was a genius for pitching it.

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  73. The blood thing makes sense, especially after that Orton/Taker Hell in a Cell match where Bob Orton bled everyone and all over everyone. Then comes out and says "Oh by the way, I have hepatitis."

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  74. He posted that there was little talk about that and that any change in the titles WWE actually has to get Mattel to agree to it. 

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  75. He did sign a NCA, but he said that since this was all old news and wasn't giving away anything about the current product, he felt like WWE probably wouldn't go out of his way to sue.

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  76. I highly recommend that people pony up 10 bucks (or whatever it is now) for Wrestling Observer and go back through their podcast archives to listen to past WWE writers talk about this stuff. It's really interesting and hilarious hearing about Vince (one writer talked about how Vince thought WILD HOGS was the best movie he'd ever seen; another writer (it may have been the same one, I don't remember) talked about how Vince would try and race him at extremely dangerous speeds on the highway).

    They're easy to find on there because they usually did the interviews with the ex-writers the week before Wrestlemania. Also, you can go back an listen to Batista's interview with Dave and Bryan. Just awesome stuff...especially when he talks about how the writers aren't the problem; it's all Vince not letting the wrestlers ad-lib but even more than Vince, it's Kevin Dunn. Apparently, according to Batista, Dunn is a total dick and thinks he's this great director, and the McMahons -- like they are with Gerwitz -- are totally bamboozled by this TV industry "pro." It's really interesting stuff and shows just how much stock the McMahon's put in their golden boy writer and TV director. From what Batista said, THAT'S the most frustrating thing.

    Anyway...I highly recommend putting up the money even for one month to get those podcasts. Really funny and interesting stuff. 

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  77. I had read reports that he killed Burchill's gimmick because he had never seen POTC.

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  78.  Hey, I actually like Wild Hogs.

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  79. That was an awesome read.  I don't think we've ever had such a detailed and inside look at some of the creative process. 

    Now, can Sheamus hurry up and become the next Cena so Cena can go full on heel???

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  80. Christopher HirschMay 24, 2012 at 12:13 PM

    What do you say, Jericho never was planned to win the Rumble! You all hear that?

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  81. I've been waiting out the John Cena thing since 2005. If I've waited 7 years for fucking Sheamus to become the next face of WWE, I think I'm giving up.

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  82. Christopher HirschMay 24, 2012 at 12:15 PM

    Bryan actually has been put over people. Rey just lost to basically everyone in non-title matches, and was squashed by giants.. Bryan actually went over Henry and Big Show, and while it might have been cheap, a wins a win. I think Bryan was protected much more than Rey ever was as champion.

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  83. Christopher HirschMay 24, 2012 at 12:17 PM

    Did you even read it? He said while things are planned in advance that doesn't prevent changes from happening, due to crowd reactions, injuries, Vince's whims, etc. He said that Raw changes many times up to the day of.

    I totally believe they have a basic idea of what they want to do, what is mostly haphazard is the steps to getting there.

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  84. Christopher HirschMay 24, 2012 at 12:19 PM

    Business would be booming if Vince had allowed Paul Burchill to remain a pirate!

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  85. Yeah that was my first thought, the guy is every bit the douchebag his Twitter feed makes him out to be.

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  86. Christopher HirschMay 24, 2012 at 12:24 PM

    I am usually pretty skeptical about things I read on the Internet but I think this is legit. If not, this guy has way too much time on his hands and needs to get some hobbies.

    Vince sounds like my boss and probably many bosses that we have worked for. He is brilliant but part of that brilliance makes him hard to work with. His mood changes constantly, he has so many ideas that he doesn't know what to do with them or keep them straight, people are intimidated by his power and his role so they don't question him, his business is his life so he knows nothing else, and he is afraid to let others do their thing without him having final say or micromanaging.

    However, if it is true that creative really forgot in the span of a week that no current employees could interfere in the Johnny/Cena match, that is awful. I mean at the very least, couldn't Johnny or even Show said that doesn't make sense?

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  87.  Pretty interesting read. Sheamus as the next big face I can totally see, he's got the look and the explosive offense that translates well to TV. Cena wanting to be a heel is hilarious, especially when 90% of the IWC blames him for his endless super-push. And add one more mark to the "CM Punk is an utter piece of shit in real life" board.

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  88. Im surprised no one has brought up his comments about Ziggler. 
    I think the majority of us are continually perplexed by the treatment Ziggler receives and how he is being continually jobbed out lately. 
    I guess now we know why.

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  89. They can't hear you. They're too busy speculating about Brock's "temper tantrum" at Extreme Rules and his "legit heat" with Cena.

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  90. I go back and forth on Punk. I've seen interviews with the guy (like the one with Ariel Helwani) where he comes across as a nice, pleasant, cool guy to talk to. But I've seen/heard other interviews, coupled with shit like the Chris Brown stuff and stories from other people where he comes off as an arrogant, self righteous, hypocritical, insecure douchebag. Plus the whole straightedge thing is a mark in the 'CON' column for sure. Someone needs to get all those guys in a room and explain to them how there are billions of people in the world that don't smoke or do drugs, except they don't feel the need to broadcast it to the world.

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  91. Who's "they"?

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  92. Christopher HirschMay 24, 2012 at 1:20 PM

    Fortune.

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  93. How dare he be a pro wrestler and improvise.

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  94. I totally agree. Bryan has been booked surprisingly strong. I just found it interesting that Vince thought that two guys who are actually totally different should both be booked to act the same way as champion because in his mind no one can believe a guy that short as champion.

    Maybe Vince realized it this time or one of the current writers got him to realize that it doesn't really work if the guy never wins.

    But I should also point out that it was all supposed to end with Bryan losing in 18 seconds to the next "Cena". And than sent back to jobberville. That probably would have happened too if it wasn't for the Miami crowds turning on that shit so much.

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  95. Hottest angle since the nWo? C'mon now. For one, that skips Stone Cold vs. McMahon, Austin vs. Rocky, etc. And while MITB got a bump comparable to what Brock vs. Cena just got, it really didn't light the whole world on fire.

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  96.  And that's why we love him.

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  97. Christopher HirschMay 24, 2012 at 2:41 PM

    We're both right.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fortune_(professional_wrestling)

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  98. That's ridiculous to say claiming you are Straight Edge shouldn't be broadcasted. Millions of people broadcast they are Christians (after all the hell Christians have brought to this world in the name of their God) and yet no one has a problem with them lording it over. You can't be biased to one sect of people unless you say it about all the peoples.

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  99.  And I don't think the problem was Nash/HHH. The biggest problem is the audience didn't have enough time to build a mass hysteria for CM Punk. Putting him in the same league as Nash and HHH is good for CM Punk and him just being involved with them gave him a nice rub.

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  100. It's an interesting paradox, though.  We love to get an inside look at the secretive inner workings of the WWE and its Superstars (such as this discussion), yet Punk is ridiculed for being outspoken about his personal lifestyle.  Do we only want to know about the Superstars if its something sordid?

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  101.  big difference between being a selfish douche and reigning in Vince's most outlandish ideas.  Vince is known to have wanted to do an incest angle with his own daughter.  He did the stupid bastard son thing.  He "killed" himself before that angle was squashed by the Benoit murders.  He did the JR surgery bit.  He loves himself some hillbillies.  He loved Puke.  Trust me, wanting to be on top, even as a part timer and get your buddy a paycheck and reigning some of Vince's most outlandish ideas are not necessarily exclusive.  He can do both.

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  102.  I can't remember TV, but I saw him go over Angle clean at a house show, so Mysterio wasn't jobbing to everyone while he was champ.

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  103. Actually, I *don't* like it when people push their faith in other peoples' faces, and a lot of people feel the same way. The term "bible thumper" has a negative connotation to it.

    Don't wanna smoke, drink, or do drugs? Fine, cool. Just don't be so starved for attention that you have to put an 'X' on each hand and proclaim it to the world. Straight-edge folks want credit for shit billions of people already do.

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  104.  in defense of "they" the guy does mention there was a lot of talk of having Jericho win the Rumble but they stuck with Sheamus in the end. 

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  105. I am anoyed that they felt Bryan's face promos sucked because he "emphasized the wrong parts"  basically if you don't fit in the homogenized baby face image, you suck.

    I also question the idea that Cena would love to turn heel when the last interview with Cena i read had him saying he'd fight a heelturn tooth and nail if the WWE asked him to turn.

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  106.  while Cena may want to be a heel, the writer also noted that Cena has a TON of control and input on his storylines and is one of a couple guys who will ad-lib, so blaming him for some of the super-Cena stuff and for his promos, doesn't seem particularly unfair.

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  107. I don't think him putting an "X" on each hand is him preaching the gospel of straight edge. Most people would not be aware of what those are if they were to look at him not knowing who he is.

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  108.  Most Cast Members that actually play the characters in costume are high school kids. All they have to do is learn how to copy the Disney-approved signatures to a T and not grab anyone's tit. I knew a lot of Cast Members, even my mom was one for a while, it's not that hard. Just a lot of arcane rules to follow.

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  109. How long do you think you could walk around in a Hornswoggle outfit before anyone noticed it wasn't him?

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  110. The reason for that, I'm guessing: Bryan has cheerleaders in the back. He probably still wouldn't be working there if HBK hadn't gotten HHH in his corner. (And before the inevitable "HBK barely even trained him!" comments, that doesn't matter. HBK was notorious for helping out his three students. He had HHH willing to lay down for Kendrick in his early days, and tried to get Cade into main events. He was putting over Danielson for years before he ever went to WWE).

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  111. THIS is terrible.  A damn toy company has to OK storyline direction.  I know the Mattel contract is a good chunk of change, but c'mon!

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  112. The straightedge thing isn't a huge deal for me, I just think the whole movement is lame (my posts with buckdiddy explain why I think that). It's more the other stuff I mentioned (i.e. being a dick to people and reveling in it).

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  113.  Do people actually believe that one? The first I even heard of that people were saying it was an obvious example of Brock trying to work the boys. Although I think there was some truth to him being pissed about Cena low-bridging him when he went for that tackle move, that was an ugly botch.

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  114. I think he's mocking the people that bought the b.s. reports stating that Jericho was supposed to win the Rumble but they switched their minds at the last minute because news had 'leaked' that he was going to win. Similar to the whole Christian/Matt Hardy heel turn stuff from a few years back. A lot of those people cited Sheamus as an "out of nowhere" winner as proof of Jericho being screwed when anyone who had been watching Smackdown since Sheamus' face turn could tell you he wasn't "out of nowhere".

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  115. He definitely beat Orton clean on Smackdown right after he won the title. And I think he also beat JBL during his reign as well. Still, he was a pretty shittily (?) booked champ.

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  116. As long as you don't bump into Pat Patterson in the men's room.

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  117. People just don't like when someone is outspoken or gloats about their life. Take Bill Murray. We all love hearing these stories of how he arrives at random parties and does weird stuff. Its funny. However, if he started calling himself The Eccentric Party King everywhere he went then people would think he's a douchebag. Its cool to hear about how great someone is from anyone but that actual person. 

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  118. Yarp.  HBK put over Bryan when he was just an RoH guy.

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  119. He said movies anybody has seen.  Maybe Vince is a big indy film guy?

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  120. That's what I meant.  I totally buy that story.  It fits everything I've head about him.

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  121. What do you want Cena to say? "Yeah man! Fuck all this kids, I can't wait to turn heel!!!!"

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  122. in the Shoot Interview with Cornette and Paul Bearer they both trash Dunn.  Guy sounds like a big reason behind Vince's obsession with being "Sports Entertainment".

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  123. I don't think they should be CZW, but it is lame to have a HITC PPV and not a drop of blood.  Save it for the biggest matches and blood tests should be done several times a year for accidents anyway.

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  124. The late Patrice O'Neal used to be a WWE writer and his experience was the same.  It is a ton of work, not a lot of communication, and you burn out fast.  He was a writer for like 8 months.

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  125. This summer

    do do do do

    Just when you thought partying

    do do do-do-do

    Couldn't get any crazier

    wa wa wa do do

    Bill Murray is

    ah-ta-ta do do do

    The Eccentric Party King

    ba-do do do do do do

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  126. With ideas like Neidfart and Shartshooter, no wonder this guy wasn't brought back.

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  127. the hottest angle since the nWo?  are you high?

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  128. Yeah, legit or not, this is the most interesting read on pro wrestling that I've read in a long time.

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  129. I'm not sure it makes sense to me.  How does going to black and white on footage containing blood have anything to do with wrestler safety?  And in the wake of Bob Orton (and I would have thought even before), my understanding is that stuff like Hepatitis is now tested for in addition to AIDS and other stuff, so risk of acquiring anything through blood is minimal if any.

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  130. I took that to mean that changing the titles themselves needs to get buy-in from Mattel (ie, eliminated the WHC, or bringing back the European title), not storylines related to the titles.

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  131. You do realize he doesn't say they are HIS ideas, right?  Or that they were ideas at all.  Just stupid jokes that someone decided to use.

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  132.  No! I just can't buy the fact that one of the two men pictured above lives in a bubble. The former WWE intern has to be pulling our chain!

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  133. First thing Vince needs to do when he official steps down, is watch the Shining. That movie is Horror gold. 

    Wait, if he hasn't seen the Shining and probably any other big movie of the last 30 years, that means.....he hasn't seen Star Wars *NERRRRRRRD RAGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEE*

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  134.  Well, I'm 5'10, and 250lbs.

    So, they'd probably call Chris Hanson and Dateline before wondering if this was really Hornswoggle.

    I'd bring you along with me to Titan Towers, but I like attention, and I'd get sick of people coming up to you and saying "Bastin! Bastin Booger! Haven't seen you in years, thought you were dead"...

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  135. No, I get that, but it's silly that the company doesn't have control over that.

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  136.  Yea, but you know Sheamus is gonna become exactly like Cena, Hell he already is sorta, and pretty soon you will start hearing "Let's Go Sheamus" Sheamus Sucks" Guarantee it

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  137. I think Pat would bump into you first...

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  138. Maybe seeing Precious inspired him to push Mark henry?

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  139. re-read what i said, I never said Cena should turn heel, i said the last interview of his i saw had him saying HE thought he SHOULDN'T"T

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