The PG Era Rant for Raw, November 17, 2014.
Here's your pre-show announcements:
- Everyone signs for the main event of Survivor Series. The match graphic implies Luke Harper is on Team Authority.
- However, later in the show, that fifth spot is blank.
- Then Alex Riley says Harper is on Team Authority.
- Anyway, Harper will face Dolph Ziggler.
- ADDED TO SURVIVOR SERIES: Cosmic Keys, Usos, Los Matadores, Miz and Sandow. Fatal Four-Way rules as opposed to elimination rules, ironically enough.
- Nikki Bella will have a warm-up match against a mystery opponent, potentially Brie.
Live from Roanoke, VA. Not that the Pre-Show will admit it.
Your hosts are Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and JBL.
We open with a look back at the Chronicles of Ryback.
Up first out of the curtain is Team Authority (with Luke Harper this
time), and introduced as such so let's say it's official. HASHTAG!
The crowd WHATs HHH's recap. HHH: “You'd like that, wouldn't you?
You'd like to see us with no power.” Crowd: “YES!” Stephanie
tells us to remember this, asking how it feels to want. HHH calls
the audience sheep in need of a leader. For example, they cheer
Vince McMahon now, but not while he was in charge. Those in charge
are meant to be evil. He asks if they want the inmates to run the
asylum... and says that's what WCW was. It's Team Authority, led by
the future and the standard-bearer, Seth Rollins, against Team Cena,
a bunch of “self-righteous malcontents led by the golden boy, John
Cena”. HHH says that an Authority loss cannot happen. And with a
free Network, you can all see it!
But that's Sunday. Stephanie is ready to talk about tonight. Since
they can't get Cena's teammates to see what is good for business,
they have no choice but to destroy the team. And at the end of the
night, it's a contract signing – if anyone's left to sign their
name. We know who's signing for Authority: Rollins, Mark Henry,
Kane, Rusev, and Harper. (Harper: “I'm a team player!”) And
that's a full team – as opposed to Team Cena, who is down one.
And then there's Ryback. The Authority thought they had Ryback, but
well, sometimes you can't seal the deal, “yada yada yada”. And
then what?
Well, “then what” means Ryback's here. He says that unlike the
wants of both teams, he just wants what's best for himself.
Stephanie says she respects that, and a McMahon believes in respect.
Everyone made mistakes (Kane “regret[s] what transpired”), and
now she asks if Ryback really wants to join John Cena, a man with no
respect – no matter what he claims. And we cut to April 2013,
where Cena claims Ryback has no brains or manhood. (Why this gets
the Superstars backdrop I don't know; it was on Raw.) And we're sure
Cena said that out of jealousy and hatred. So, seriously, you really
want to join that? Which is it – contempt or respect? The
answer? Neither. And with that, he storms off.
HHH approves of the decision of neutrality, because anyone in the
fight will be decimated. Luke Harper's match with Dolph Ziggler is
next!
Another 20-minute promo. Another missed opportunity for more
matches and more midcard pushing.
Meanwhile, During the Break, this is made a title match.
Intercontinental
Title: Dolph Ziggler (champion) v. Luke Harper (challenger).
Seth Rollins is on commentary. But before the match begins, Mercury
and Noble jump Dolph from behind and, along with Rollins, knock him
out with the briefcase. Dolph slowly pulls himself up and, against
the referee's better suggestions, demands the match begin. Harper
with a big boot for two right off the bell. Powerbomb gets two.
Corner big boot misses, though, and Harper flies out of the ring as
we go to break.
This
is basic wrestling 101. The heel gets an advantage illegally, the
face tries to rally.
IC Title
Match, continued.
Harper has floored Dolph as we return, and the referee is checking
on Dolph, who refuses to stop. Harper fakes a front suplex, settling
for a palm strike for two. Gator Roll follows, into a headlock.
Dolph breaks with a jawbreaker. Harper eats the steel post on a
charge, and the Rocker Dropper gets two. Superkick is caught into
the Bossman Slam for two. Harper measures Dolph for a long time, but
the discus clothesline is interrupted with a superkick for two.
Harper with a knee strike as Rollins demands the finish, but the
powerbomb is escaped only to result in the Discus Clothesline for the
pin and the title at 8:29. **1/4
Rollins stands over a beaten Dolph, taunts him, and delivers the
Curbstomp for good measure.
Match
could've been longer the way they were milking it, but what the heck.
Now the question is if Dolph is capable of competing on Sunday.
Kofi
Kingston's new day is coming.
Meanwhile,
Miz gives Damien Sandow a pep talk – but Sandow is busy copying
Miz. This is for the benefit of Grumpy Cat. Grumpy Cat's response:
he has none. He's a cat. So they have a Grumpy Stunt Cat. Still no
smile. So Miz tells the cat off. The crowd noticeably hated this.
We
get Adam Rose's intro for his match before the break. Notably, The
Bunny does Rose's stage dive before Rose can and is admonished by
Rose. He seems to realize his faux-pas.
Adam Rose
v. Tyson Kidd.
Both Natalya and the Bunny are at ringside. Rose makes damn sure to
keep Bunny in his corner and stay there. Rose pummels Kidd in the
corner and does reverse stomps in to a seated Kidd. Kidd reverses
with a running kick and goes nuts in the corner. Rose with a
spinebuster for two as the Bunny hops to Natalya. Rose reminds the
Bunny to go back to the corner, which allows Kidd the Sharpshooter
for the tapout at 1:54. Rose wanted Bunny's help, but Bunny was too
busy asking Nataya to join the Express. Bunny tries to ask
forgiveness, but Rose goes to take him out... only this time the
Bunny twerks his way out and escapes.
WrestleMania
tickets are on sale. I expect Matt Perri to report on this.
Why?
Why are you turning Adam Rose heel? And why are you turning him
heel on a member of his entourage? I'm certain this is Kevin Dunn's
fault.
Bray
Wyatt comes down to talk. He says They tried to convince us that
love was the greatest wealth. They said love was the greatest gift.
But They never said that everything you love can be destroyed. And a
man with nothing to love or lose is the most dangerous man. “Poor...
Dean... Ambrose.” See, every day is another pathetic attempt to
share love out of obligation. He has no choice – he will always be
miserable and alone. But he has to make sure Bray's generosity is
not malignant. Yeah, Bray had to get Dean's attention, but he comes
in peace. Yes, Dean still feels the pain, but that pain is a gift.
Bray knows Dean's pain. An absent father, a drunken mother – Bray
brings these up because he can save Dean. He asks Dean to feel the
salvation Bray has. Embrace it, Dean, and all the pain goes away.
But
Ambrose interrupts from the TitanTron. He heard everything every
night. Every rambling word – he hears it and it's nails on a
chalkboard. But Dean wants to see things Bray's way. Maybe Bray
does want to help – why else go into his past? It's not because
it's to get the leg up on Survivor Series, or because Dean cares.
But Dean has learned from Bray Wyatt – like this magic trick called
“Video Recording”. Ambrose is in the arena right now... and here
he comes! It's a war in the ring, but Wyatt escapes. Dean says he
needs no savior, but Bray must save himself.
Michael
Cole tells us Dolph Ziggler is no longer in the arena and is getting
medical attention.
Do
you think there's any chance of telling you my master plan if you
could stop it? I began things 35 minutes ago.
Dan
“Larry the Cable Guy” Witney is next week's guest star.
Ryback v.
Cesaro.
Ryback runs him over for one to start. Ryback reverses a headlock
and gets a slam and splash for one. A chop battle breaks out, with
Cesaro getting an uppercut and suplex, but Ryback no-sells and gets a
facejam and stalling suplex for one. Ryback runs into an Exploder
suplex from Cesaro, and Cesaro punches away as John Cena is watching
the match. Cesaro chokes Ryback down in the ropes, but runs into a
Thesz Press and mat slams. Cesaro with a powerbomb out of the corner
on a mounted Ryback. Running mushroom stomp gets two, and to the
chinlock. Cesaro with a slam of Ryback for two. Ryback rushes
Cesaro into the corner with shoulder thrusts, but Cesaro with a
Hammer Throw and sleeper. Ryback sent into the corner, but he gets a
big boot. Splash hits the knees, and Cesaro clears Ryback out of the
ring as we go to break.
I
can't be the only one thinking this should've been a squash.
Ryback/Cesaro,
continued.
Ryback fights out of a chinlock, but an awkward exchange puts Cesaro
back in charge. Clothesline gets two. Cena is still watching during
another chinlock. Ryback fights out, catching Cesaro off the top
rope with an overhead suplex. Comeback begins here with a
spinebuster. Cesaro goes to the apron and drapes Ryback on the top
rope, but Ryback flips him into the ring and gets a second-rope
splash. He catches Cesaro's boot attempt and powerbombs him out of
the corner for two. Shell Shock try is escaped into a German suplex.
Ryback escapes a second one, but goes into the post. Rolling
Germans into a bridge get two. To the top, and the HBK elbow gets
two. Military press into a slam out of nowhere by Ryback gets two.
Meathook is ready, but Ryback runs into Swiss Death for two.
Neutralizer is reversed to a Shell Shock try, but Cesaro cradles for
two. Meathook and Shell Shock wins it at 14:12. I mean, it was a
decent power match and all. *1/2
Rene
Young finds John Cena backstage and asks about the Authority's plans.
Cena says everything's on the line, but he sees the Authority's
game. All he can do is hope that everyone's at the contract signing.
So is Ryback on the team, she asks? Cena says probably not.
I
do not understand the booking here. Ryback is best used to steamroll
people to retain his aura, especially since this is a new push.
Meanwhile, Cesaro has been sent down the ladder. This match
shouldn't have gone 5 minutes, let alone 15.
Lana
wants us to shut up. Putin was disrespected at the G-20 Summit and
stuff. Americans have no taste for salivating over Kim Kardashian.
We all know Lana's sexier than any American. (“I'm the best.”)
And she has a topless photo of her own – of Vladimir Putin, of
course. But Heath Slater comes out to some patriot rock and dressed
as Uncle Sam, asking Lana to shut up. And tonight, it ends. “Ding
ding, you son of a _____!”
Non-title:
Rusev v. Heath Slater. Superkick,
Rusev Crush, goodnight at 31 seconds. What, you expected something
else?
Back
to Grumpy Cat and Miz, as Miz wants to do a buddy comedy with Grumpy
Cat. Erick Rowan shows up. “Here kitty kitty kitty... I want that
cat.” And so he takes Grumpy Stunt Cat.
As
always, the important thing about these segments isn't that someone
gets over, or that a story is advanced, or that wrestlers do somethin
that will get the people talking the next day. No, it's that Vince
is amused by them.
Big
Show has a match, but here's Stephanie McMahon instead. Stephanie
remembers Big Show being billed as the son of Andre. It shows Big
Show has always been in a person's shadow. He wanted to be the big
draw, but he thinks the fans determine it. The fans don't decide
that sort of thing – the Authority does. So do you pander to the
fans or resent them? He's flip-flopped repeatedly, but all he had to
do was listen to the Authority. Here's her offer: step away from
Team Cena and they will put him into the WWE Hall of Fame at
WrestleMania 31, while still active. This clearly gets Big Show's
attention. After some off-mic conversation, and some prodding by
Stephanie (“Don't listen to these people; listen to those who can
actually make a difference”), Show clearly is seen saying no.
And
here comes Sheamus. “Sorry, Mrs. Haitch.” He too is proud to be
a part of Team Cena and will make history on Sunday. This time next
week, the only time people will see the Authority is if they buy a
ticket. Stephanie's not intimidated, though. See, there was an
office issue: Sheamus's passport has complications and there might be
a clerical error that makes Sheamus's work visa null and void. “That
would be a bit problematic, wouldn't it?” And now Stephanie ups
the ante: Big Show will face Sheamus tonight, and the winner will
face Brock Lesnar in the future. And this is NOW!
Big Show
v. Sheamus.
Both men are hesitant to start. Handshake, though. Clean break in
the ropes by Show, then one in the corner. And another in the
corner. Shoving match begins, and Show works Sheamus down in the
corner. Sheamus fights back but eats turnbuckle and the CHOP OF
DOOM. More chopping in the corner, but Sheamus kicks away only to be
tossed over the ropes. Show throws Sheamus into the timekeeper's
area as we go to break.
As
much as the lows of this show have been low, the Story of the Episode
has been pretty interesting so far. I wonder who's going to win
here, even though I'm certain it'll end in a no-contest beatdown, and
I can't wait for the payoff at the contract signing.
Show/Sheamus,
continued.
Show signals for the chokeslam, but Sheamus fights out and gets the
Ten of Clubs in the center of the ring. Running kick and kneedrop
follow, for two. Sheamus tries a slam, but uh, no. Show reverses,
following with an elbowdrop for two. Show slams Sheamus down again,
three times in a row. Elbowdrop gets two. Headbutt by Show, and the
Haas of Pain follows. Sheamus barely makes the ropes. He's fired up
and throws punches and Irish Hammers to begin the comeback.
Kneelift, but he runs into a Show thrust kick. Another elbowdrop,
but it misses. Sheamus drapes Show on the ropes, but gets speared in
mid-air for two. Chokeslam time, but Sheamus escapes and gets the
White Noise for two. Brogue Kick is caught, and chokeslam gets two.
Show goes to the second rope, but Sheamus catches him with an
electric chair drop (!!). And right on cue, here's Rusev and Mark
Henry to take everybody out at 11:13. Good power match while it
lasted. **
Rusev stomps away on Show as Henry sends Sheamus through the table
with the World's Strongest Slam. Rusev Crush on a knocked out Big
Show just to rub it in. Crowd wants Cena to make the save, but he's
not dumb enough to run into a 1-on-2.
So
for the record, Sheamus was the first one hit. So if on Monday,
Sheamus demands Brock Lesnar at TLC or Fastlane, this is why. I kind
of hope they follow through.
On
the Kickoff Show panel will be Paul Heyman and Bad News Barrett.
Plus, Fandango will have a match.
Nikki
Bella v. AJ Brie.
Remember on the pre-show about how Nikki had a special warm-up
match? Here it is. Brie dressed as AJ looks pretty good. But
before the match, AJ Lee emerges for real to watch and do commentary.
The fans even chant CM Punk at the fake AJ. Nikki does some warmups
after the bell rings, then has Brie run into a hiptoss. Nikki runs
Brie over (AJ: “She looks better than I do in it.”), then gets a
pair of backbreakers. She pulls Brie up at two. She drags Brie
around by the hair, then gets a hair slam into the corner. Charge
eats elbow, which Nikki is furious at. AJ jumps onto the apron,
Nikki swings at her, and Brie rolls up Nikki for the pin at 2:02.
Nikki loses it and beats Brie down after the match, with AJ saving
and getting the Shining Wizard. Then she stops a YES chant and DDTs
Brie. 1/4*,
but the angle of the match was a good idea.
Darn.
I was hoping AJ and Brie would form an alliance just to troll all
the self-proclaimed “RoH-bots”.
Yup, it's official: Big E is in New
Day.
Backstage, John Cena approaches
Ryback for one last desperate sell job. But Ryback is still offended
by what was said a year ago. But Cena says, after that, he earned
Cena's respect. If Ryback joins Cena, the Authority is in big
trouble – besides, HHH can throw Ryback away on a whim, or Ryback
can control his destiny. But Ryback knows the Authority's games and
doesn't care; he's on his own. Cena then says Ryback is playing it
safe and selfish. Why would the guy who wants to be fed more turn
down a spot at the big table? Cena walks off on that.
It
seems clear Ryback is going to jump to Team Cena, but they'll keep it
until the very last second. So because I have nothing else to say: a
new Little Big Planet AND both WWE15 and GTA V on PS4? Tomorrow's a
big day for video games, isn't it?
On SmackDown, we will have the Dean
Ambrose Survival Kit. Whatever that is.
The Usos
and Los Matadores v. Goldust, Stardust, Miz, and Damien Sandow.
Thankfully, no Mizswoggle present. Miz and Primo start. Miz (and
Sandow by proxy) works a headlock, and a criss-cross goes nowhere.
Primo trips Miz into the ropes, and Epico with a tope atomico for
two. Miz with a boot off of a crossbody and he works the arm.
Goldust in (and not Sandow), and he works Epico in the corner. Epico
reverses as the crowd wants MizDow. Epico with a diving rana, and
Primo does it to Stardust. Miz falls to a double hiptoss, and
Sandow... imitates the bump from Miz. The Matadors dive onto the
champs, and El Torito lands on Miz (with Sandow selling it) as we go
to break.
Damien
Sandow's face turn is going to be amazing.
8-man tag,
continued.
Goldust is working over Primo, sending him into the corner.
Stardust in, and the two stomp away. Stardust with a front suplex
for one. Stardust works the arm, dropping his knees on it. Miz in,
as the crowd is tired of waiting for Sandow and chants for the
announcers. Running kick gets two. Miz works the headlock, but
Primo with a sunset flip try, cradling Miz off of a figure-four
attempt for two. Goldust in (as Sandow is getting sick of waiting
for his turn), and he gets a running elbow for two. Stardust steals
the tag from Sandow and gets some knee strikes. Primo tries to fight
back, but Stardust cuts it off as Miz tags himself in to continue.
FINALLY, Sandow is tagged in, only for Miz to tag himself back in
before contact. That's some great heeling. Primo chops away, but
Miz cuts it off with a kneelift. Figure-four try, but Primo sends
Miz out of the ring. Sandow crawls next to him, while Stardust cuts
off the hot tag. Primo with a flapjack, and it's hot tag Jimmy and
Jey. Jey dives onto Sandow, and Jimmy gets the comeback on Stardust.
Samoan Throw by Jimmy, then the Rikishi hip check. Goldust cuts it
off, so Epico with a Backstabber, Miz with the Skull-Crushing Finale,
Primo a dropkick, Stardust tosses Primo, Jimmy superkicks Epico by
mistake, and Stardust with Dark Matter for the win at 11:36. Whew.
***
Sandow himself is worth a full half-star. Grumpy Cat is not amused.
According
to the announcers, Sheamus is out of Survivor Series now.
And
there's the opening to bring Orton back in. I hope they don't forget
about Swagger, though.
If
Larry the Cable Guy is going to be hosting Raw, you think they can
bring Ron White or Bill Engvall in for my sake?
So,
it's contract signing time, as we look back at everyone getting taken
apart. HASHTAG! HHH reminds us what's at stake on Sunday, and says
that in the WWE... wait, you people don't get it. The fans think
they love the WWE and have a passion, and so does Cena. BUT, none of
this compares to HHH and Stephanie. Everything about them is the
WWE. This is their life and family, and the fans have no idea. This
is for the family, going back to Stephanie's great-grandfather. It's
the air they breathe. They cannot lose. (He emphasizes this to
Stephanie, who responds “We won't lose.”) The sudden change of
tone lost the crowd until HHH barks “we won't lose” to each of
his teammates. He calls this the last chance for Team Cena to
withdraw, because if they don't, they will regret it.
Stephanie
makes it clear: there's nothing wrong in walking away. Vince
challenged the Authority to be better leaders, and now look at the
team they've assembled. In this ring, it's survival of the fittest,
and this team has taken Cena's team apart all night. So here's
what's left: only John Cena.
Cena
comes out alone, thinks about walking away, then heads to the ring.
HHH pretends to look for teammates. “I can't see the rest of your
team.” Cena promises all the laughs stop on Sunday. With the
entire world watching – for free – they will see the Authority
out of business. Stephanie: “You and what army?” Sheamus is in
the hospital, remember. There's no Big Show or Ziggler either – or
anyone else, because they value their career over anything else.
Cena's alone in his myopic quest. “Wake up, Cena!”
Cena
tells Stephanie to stop orders, because the Authority will lose on
Sunday. Yeah, Stephanie has a dream team with bases covered, and the
underhanded sabotage has happened, but they missed one man – the
man who will make sure they lose. Every week, they waltz out and put
the people to sleep, then claim it's Best For Business? Really?
It's best for them! Cena will go to war with four fans if he wants!
(And he even asks if the crowd wants it.) He looks for four good
team members, picking random audience members to say he'll fight with
the crowd on his side. And even if he was outmanned, his team has
passion for the WWE, with no suck-ups and sell-outs. So here's a
preview: for free on the WWE Network (“it ain't even 9.99
anymore”), the Authority will watch their Dream Team try to destroy
John Cena. They will sit at ringside and wait for the formality.
But that's where the Authority team falls. Kane will go first. Kane
has gone from Brother of Destruction to a Drew Carey wannabe. (HHH
pretends to fall asleep, but he gets called on it.) Luke Harper is
next. And then they'll be stunned when Rusev fails... and that's
when they get nervous. Stephanie will be too sick to watch. Then
they'll be hungry, and they'll get fed Sexual Chocolate. And after
all that, it's Seth Rollins. And when he gets HIS attitude adjusted,
the Authority will see their nightmare happen in 3 seconds. It'll be
fitting, he says, if they become janitors.
Stephanie
slaps Cena to cut him off.
Cena
calls it go-time, removes the table, and is ready to fight the world.
But he's not alone – Dolph Ziggler returns to stay on the team.
And then Big Show is out to declare he's not done. HHH still counts
the numbers and realizes he has the edge. And then Luke Harper's
music plays? Because here's Erick Rowan to side with Cena! Crowd
knows Ryback is next. Stephanie is surprised, but notices Cena's
still down one man. And if you go 4-on-5, you will lose. She offers
them one last chance to reconsider...
...and
out comes Cesaro to complete the team! Just kidding – he's with
the Authority. Stephanie laughs at her prank as Cena feels
backstabbed. “Any more surprises?”
And
here comes Ryback. And he charges the ring and the fight is on!
Team Cena clears the ring with Rollins up for an AA, but HHH cuts it
off. He goes for a Pedigree, but Ryback glares at him and wants
some. (For the record, Cesaro was a fake-out and left right away.)
And Cena catches HHH during the staredown and sends HHH through the
table to end the fight.
Erick
Rowan? I like that! This is exactly what we need – use a match
like this to elevate someone. That's what they're doing with Harper
and Rowan here. If this sticks, it will be very interesting.
STATS:
MATCH
TIME: 49:57 over seven matches
BEST
MATCH: Eight-man tag
WORST
MATCH: Rusev/Slater
NIGHT
MVP: Luke Harper
FINAL
SCORE: 5.5. This was cruising for a 4/10 after all the good and bad
seemed to cancel out. But the contract signing, despite the
monologues, produced some big surprises and made Erick Rowan and Luke
Harper very big deals. Heck, maybe the fake-outs (Swagger and
Cesaro) will be revived. With all the emphasis on the main event,
they had to do something crazy, and they did this.
Matt
Perri is here for Main Event. Tommy Hall does NXT and SmackDown.
Brian Bayless will give you our Raw and Survivor Series for our
e-fed. Scott Keith will provide the old-school 1995 stuff, while
Bayless digs into the 1986 stuff. Dock Muraco looks at the goings-on
in Japan. And we'll keep the forums open for you to talk.
For
those here for Raw, see you on Monday! If you want more of my
opinion, stick around.
Okay,
so if you want to go to the comments, you won't miss anything. But
it's time for a How I'd Book It, and this is supersized. Not just
Survivor Series, but... you'll see.
SURVIVOR
SERIES – HOW I'D BOOK IT:
- Fandango defeats Adam Rose. Rose blames the Bunny and pulls off the head to reveal Sami Zayn.
- Dean Ambrose defeats Bray Wyatt.
- Goldust and Stardust win the Fatal Four-Way when Stardust pins Mizdow. A furious Mizdow turns on Miz afterwards.
- BONUS MATCH: Team Swagger (Jack Swagger, Heath Slater, Big E, and Kofi Kingston) defeat Team Cesaro (Cesaro, Tyson Kidd, Justin Gabriel, and Titus O'Neil). Order of elimination: Kidd submits Slater, Kingston pins Gabriel, Big E pins Titus, Swagger pins Cesaro, Kingston and Big E pin Kidd.
- Nikki Bella pins AJ Lee to win the Divas' Title.
- The Authority defeats Team Cena. Order of elimination: Rusev submits Rowan, Cena pins Kane, Rusev and Ryback are counted out, Ziggler pins Harper, Rollins pins Ziggler, Henry pins Show, Cena pins Henry, Rollins pins Cena. But, as the match ends, a furious Randy Orton returns and attacks Rollins.
WRESTLEMANIA
31 – HOW I'D BOOK IT:
I
have felt for some time that by the end of Survivor Series, you
should know your WrestleMania. So, I do. Here it is:
- The New Day defeat Goldust and Stardust to win the WWE Tag Team Titles.
- Roman Reigns wins the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal.
- Seth Rollins defeats Randy Orton.
- CURTAIN CALL: Shawn Michaels defeats Sting.
- Team Vince (Vince McMahon, Dolph Ziggler, Ryback, and Jack Swagger) defeat Team HHH (Triple H, Kane, Luke Harper, and Bad News Barrett) for control of the company.
- John Cena defeats Rusev.
- Brie Bella defeats Paige, AJ Lee, and Nikki Bella to win the WWE Divas' Title.
- Royal Rumble winner Dean Ambrose defeats Brock Lesnar to win the WWE Heavyweight Title.
HALL
OF FAME: Sting, Brutus Beefcake, Rock and Roll Express, Reverend
Slick, Rick Martel, Davey Boy Smith, celebrity inductee Butterbean.
The
next night on Raw, Seth Rollins cashes in on Dean Ambrose and is
ready to win the gold, but Daniel Bryan appears out of nowhere to
break it up and allow Ambrose to retain.
I like the Harper call up, but I'm pretty skeptical with Rowan. I haven't seen much from him that impressed me really and those teams are already a little light on star power..
ReplyDeleteSo the main event angle in 2014 is still John Cena vs HHH and Stephanie, right? OK cool. I'll continue to not even subscribe to the Network if they offered to pay ME to do so.
ReplyDeleteWow this is bad.
OH MY GOD A CAT WAS ON FOR FIVE MINUTES! WRESTLING IS RUINED FOREVER!
ReplyDeleteYeah that could have been much, much worse.
ReplyDeleteIt does make me wonder though: why even bother bringing him in when it's going to make fans roll their eyes, they barely mentioned the cat movie and it's there for all of two minutes combined. It seems like such a waste of time and money for no pay.....I'm answering my own question aren't I?
"Royal Rumble winner Dean Ambrose defeats Brock Lesnar to win the WWE Heavyweight Title."
ReplyDeleteHAHAHA ok. You realize Dean Ambrose is a comedy mid carder who, if he's even on Mania, will be a guy in the Battle Royal, right?
The cat segments were better than the opening and closing segments.
ReplyDeleteSo based on live attendance, ratings, Network numbers, and typical crowd reactions on TV--- WWE is putting on awesome shows and doing gangbuster business, right?
ReplyDelete...comedy mid carder. He just main evented the last PPV and he's a comedy midcarder. Just because you don't like him doesn't mean no one else does.
ReplyDeleteIt makes absolutely no sense why HHH would want Harper in the match instead of himself.
ReplyDeleteOr any of the other guys, I guess.
ReplyDeletePersonally I think that Rusev should be kept separate from all of this, and then let Trips in, or whatever.
He main evented the last PPV so they could close the show with Wyatt's ghost standing tall. What of note does Ambrose do anymore? It seems like he's never even been involved in this big all encompassing main event angle, which is an obvious giant demotion for him.
ReplyDeleteListen, we all wanted Ambrose to be great, but he is what he is. Santino with slime instead of a sock puppet, who's the guy who gets to put over the heels who then face the real main eveners like Cena and Orton.
It's kind of amazing how everyone is being made to look dumb in this whole thing. It's pretty obvious Rowan's turning at Survivor Series. Cena's descending to Sting levels of stupidity on this one.
ReplyDeleteThe cat was fucking retarded, but it wasn't the worst part of the show.
ReplyDeleteCM Punk was never involved with the Authority either, but he was no less important as a result. He just had his own fight.
ReplyDeleteWhen Ambrose is done with Bray Wyatt, I'm certain he'll get back to unfinished business. The feud with Rollins needs a clean, absolute finish.
That last segment sounds awful. HHH goes through a table. Oh no! Wonder if him and Stephanie will open the show with a 30-minute promo next week!
ReplyDeleteI don't mind Rusev being involved cause that makes sense that the authority would recruit him... Wish they held off on harpers return and Rowan also until post survivor series. Orton being on team Cena would of been pretty awesome. I know he is filming whatever he is filming
ReplyDelete"The feud with Rollins needs a clean, absolute finish." Yup, and that finish is Rollins serving as Roman's and Randy's job boy in the months leading up to Mania.
ReplyDeleteAmbrose ain't getting that win because he's not valued at that level. And he's far from Daniel Bryan in the overness category right now, so it's not like WWE is gonna have its hand forced.
Ambrose is the mid card comedy guy and face jobber. His role here is to put Bray over before, I dunno, Bray has to feud with Cena again or whatever actual top face (Big Show?) he's matched up with for real.
RESTHOLD: The Hold That Eats People
ReplyDeleteOh, I see the problem. You can't read. It says HOW I'D BOOK IT, not HOW IT'LL BE.
ReplyDeleteHahaha yup that's it. Yeah I actually thought you had an actual time machine rather than awful predictions. Yup, got me! Oh brother.
ReplyDeleteThe Rollins/Ambrose feud is not going to be revisited. They fucked it all up well before the Hell in a Cell match.
ReplyDeleteThe only logical way to bring it back is if Ambrose costs Rollins his cash-in.
ReplyDeleteYup that's a pipe dream. They got what they wanted out of that feud, which was to bump Rollins up a notch before he jobs to Orton and Roman. Dean winning that feud is lower on their list of concerns than the Divas' division.
ReplyDelete"CURTAIN CALL: Shawn Michaels defeats Sting."
ReplyDelete0 percent chance.
True, but I'd watch it, and it might even be kinda awesome, depending on HBK's conditioning.
ReplyDeleteI think sheamus showing up and aiding authority would make more sense... Rowan being a face is random. Probably right he will turn. I'm just holding out hope for heel sheamus
ReplyDeleteBut I like Randy... I can't be alone
ReplyDeleteVia the opening & closing segments it took them FORTY MINUTES to confirm the 2 teams they set up last week, with Rowan replacing Sheamus because WWE. The low point was the bunny dry humping Adam Rose.
ReplyDeleteUgh, this show should not have gotten a pass mark.
ReplyDeleteI'll give you the opener as HHH and Stephanie drive me nuts with that slow talking. The ending was fine, albeit even more about a story that we'd heard about all night now.
ReplyDeleteDon't bother, Dougie is going to take a couple of comments from here, post them on NPP, make a snide remark about said comments, then cry when a few from this forum go over there to troll.
ReplyDeleteYou're really stretching it here.
ReplyDeleteThe really frustrating thing is virtually all the in-ring action was perfectly fine this week. The matches all seemed too long or too short, but the bell-to-bell action is fine--even good at times. It's just the writing, the booking, the very storytelling the company engages in is so awful. Ok, fine, we're all dicks here online... but you cannot ignore how DEAD they killed that crowd. It's easy to complain, watching at home for free, but those are the true believers in attendance. They PAID to be there. They didn't hate it. They didn't boo. They just got quieter and quieter til you could hear a mouse fart. The "pop" Cena got when he finally came out for the last segment was embarrassing.
ReplyDeleteA man can dream.
ReplyDeleteHere we see the baby boy zilch in it's own habitat. Watch as it carries on about the wrestling show with a total lack of self-awareness. it flails around impotently as John Cena ruins his (lack of a) life. Perhaps the most severe case of the OH NOES ever recorded.
ReplyDeleteI just realized the main event "contract signing" didn't involve a contract being signed.
ReplyDeleteAs a lifelong super fan who finally has given up on watching and paying for this garbage (I'm a former Network subscriber who cancelled after HiaC and won't even consider re-upping for the free month), here's the long and short of it from me: the entire roster blows.
ReplyDeleteNo not talent-wise, there are guys here who can wrestle/perform sure. But through awful booking it's basically become a roster of heatless uncool goons who I give zero fucks about. It's either forever main eveners like Cena, Orton, HHH, and Steph who've been around forever and have nothing new to ever do again, or beaten down "new stars" like Ambrose, Cesaro, etc who come off as mid card loser jokes.
Nobody on this roster is cool or interesting or captivating, or comes off as important. They're all just props to HHH/Steph/Cena/Orton etc. Bryan and Punk were able to carry the show in recent years by the force of their overness, but without them the whole show has become exposed.
Logic gap: Why would Zayn be doing comedy as a bunny when he has a Career Threatening Match in 3 weeks... also at Mania Sting/Taker (Sting goes over!) has to happen.
ReplyDeleteSo Harper wins a title before Bray.
ReplyDeleteHow often does a lackey win a title before the supposed leader of the group? Rock won the IC Title before Farooq won a title obviously.
"On SmackDown, we will have the Dean Ambrose Survival Kit."
ReplyDeleteIn case anyone forgot for a second that Dean Ambrose is a comes prop mid carder.
Holy shit how embarrassing is that gonna be.
You said below that you've stopped watching and that you want nothing to do with the product. Why do you post here? Just to rub in how much smarter you are?
ReplyDeleteI'm cool with Adam Rose turning heel, but only if his character takes on a Dino Velvet vibe.
ReplyDeleteI've watched this shit my whole life and I've posted here for years. Piss off dummy.
ReplyDeleteThat's not answering my question. You've stopped watching and washed your hands of the WWE. So why bother posting about how much you hate it? If you hate it that much, walk away.
ReplyDeleteI usually agree with him, but yeah. He's getting ridiculous now. He's like Bizarro Vince Jordan tonight. Ambrose is not Santino by any stretch of the imagination.
ReplyDeleteBut you're psyched that Dean Ambrose has a prop comedy bit lined up for Friday right? Obviously he's shooting up the card.
ReplyDeleteAnswer. The. Question.
ReplyDeleteI've walked away from watching bad WWE TV and paying for WWE product, yes. But maybe you didn't notice this website and WWE aren't the same thing.
ReplyDeleteI still will read some recaps and discuss on occasion on this blog that I like. So yeah, as I said before, piss off dummy.
I didn't realize showing a paid receipt to WWE Network was a prerequisite for being on the BoD. Thanks for the heads up champ!
ReplyDeleteAnd yet here you are. You read my recap, fine. All you had to do was say, "Well, nothing changed", and hit the bright x in the upper right hand corner. Instead, you wish to tell the world how much you hate it.
ReplyDeleteDid. Be.Low.
ReplyDeletePiss. Off. Dummy. ;)
You don't like the WWE, and yet you talk about how bad it is. You're adding nothing to the discussion, and in fact you've hijacked it to tell everyone who doesn't hate WWE as much as you to "piss off dummy". What's gotten into you?
ReplyDeleteAgain, thanks for telling me what my posting regulations are on this website that you don't run. Very helpful.
ReplyDeleteSomeone's a Lemon.
ReplyDeleteWhen you do nothing but piss all over the show, you're not exactly adding to conversation or decorum. It's people like you that make people leave the site.
ReplyDeleteI don't like WWE product as it stands now, exactly. I've been a pro wrestling fan my whole life and enjoyed (and still do) this blog for years.
ReplyDeleteI realize that it makes you sad or whatever when people don't like WWE, but your attempt at board policing here is annoying as hell.
I just can't shake off how so little of it means anything, and how much of my brain I have to shut off to even be remotely engaged by any of it. Like the Authority losing power stip. As badly as I want that to happen, I don't really think it will; and with barely any thought I can come up with a dozen ways the Authority should be able to easily prevent it or undo it if it happens. So even if it does happen I feel like I have to be an idiot to enjoy it. When I have to be repeatedly told "just shut up and go with it" is usually when I walk away from it.
ReplyDeleteI don't care whether you like the show or not. I do care that you've arrived here and done nothing but talk about how me, my ideas, and the ideas of anyone who likes anything about this show are awful.
ReplyDeleteWWE's awful product is making people leave the site. People are losing interest correlates to losing interest in WWE overall.
ReplyDeleteOr yeah, it's the fault of people not praising an awful TV show. Gotcha.
I've been watching wrestling for 20 years and I've never seen a crowd as dead as this one. Not even close.
ReplyDeleteYou know what would help? If there were a title for people to want. You know, a champion with a target on his chest. Something that is the most prized thing out there. Make people want to take him down, challenge him all the time, and walk up to him to get his attention.
ReplyDeleteThis show has felt especially out of direction since the WWE Title walked away.
Is it possible that the roster's current un-cool-ness has less to do with the product getting worse and more to do with you growing up and becoming more mature? Expecting the product and the characters to grow with you isn't very realistic when WWE will always have a target audience of teenagers.
ReplyDeleteWel here's he thing: you shouldn't care. Quit the board policing and the attempt at enforcing some pretend "BoD Rulebook" that you wrote in your bathroom.
ReplyDeleteWWE is pretty bad right now, that's the sentiment on this blog if you haven't noticed too. I'm not coming in her and trolling a website of people who are loving WWE TV.
I want to see steen unveiled as the bunny and just destroy Rose.
ReplyDeleteThat is not what I said. What I said was, it's the fault of people who don't try to have a conversation, but instead treat any opposing opinion with disdain and beneath them, as though the rest of the world who didn't agree with them were idiots. Just look here! Dean Ambrose, who just main evented the previous PPV is a "comedy mid carder", and any attempt to point out otherwise, you just say "no, you're wrong and I'm right and status quo will remain". You're not discussing, you're proclaiming.
ReplyDeleteSo tell me, what does WWE need to do to get you back? And if it's "nothing", go read the retro stuff, the Japan stuff, the ROH stuff, and so on, and ignore WWE>
Orton should be on team Cena and HHH on team authority. I would be so much more enthusiastic.
ReplyDeleteYes, WWE is in a slump. Okay? It should be better than it is. But guess what: I will keep watching. And I'll keep looking for signs of hope. And when people say "you and your opinions are stupid", I'll keep calling them out for being douchebags. Which, right now, you are.
ReplyDelete"And if it's "nothing", go read the retro stuff, the Japan stuff, the ROH stuff, and so on, and ignore WWE>"
ReplyDeleteWow man, seriously piss off with this "you go do this now!" Seriously wtf you crazy person.
Also, I'm about as far from a Japan/ROH guy as it gets. This isn't a case of WWE can't win me back because my demands are unreasonable. But right now they're about as bad as they've ever been.
And Dean Ambrose-- a good wrestler who has/had lots of potential--- absolutely is a joke right now and comedy mid carder is way more apt than rising star. But yeah his survival guide prop bit should be huge.
HAHAHA, self aggrandize much? Calm down there sport.
ReplyDeleteI think WWE itself would argue with being characterized as appealing to only a narrow demographic group. They'd never have started the Network if that were the case.
ReplyDeleteYou're the one who's resorted to names here, not me. I'm trying to get in your head. I don't think your demands, whatever they are, are unreasonable. I just wonder what they are.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm not feeling good about this Survival Kit thing either. It's bad comedy and it reeks of Vince and Kevin Dunn trying to submarine Wyatt and Ambrose because they didn't create those two. But I remember thinking the Muppets/Raw crossover would be a nightmare, and the comedy on the show was actually well-done. So there's a chance. Heck, Ambrose might build it up and say, "I am my own survival kit; I don't need anything but my two fists", and he'd be a badass overnight.
This isn't cool to a target audience of teenagers.
ReplyDeleteThis TV show is cool to a senile old man and his moron daughter.
More to a senile old man and his toady production guy. I doubt Stephanie has power anymore -- this is all Vince and Dunn.
ReplyDeleteThe heels had a 5 on 1 advantage, let Cena talk shit about them, and it ended with him bringing in Erick Rowan on his team, a guy who was jumping him from behind a few months back.
ReplyDeleteTerrible and non-sensical ending.
Steph is bringing in the corporate element to the company.
ReplyDeleteAgain, as it pertains simply to Ambrose the writing is clearly on the wall--- the real baby faces on this show are Cena and Orton and Roman.
ReplyDeleteAmbrose is an afterthought. He was there to put over Rollins for the other three to feud with and beat before Mania. Ambrose isn't a priority, he's doing awful comedy bits, and frankly the last few weeks I watched he came off as a lukewarm mid carder.
Talent-wise he's better than that, but he is what he is what he is. Another example of WWE having no idea how to produce wrestling anymore.
Still, wrestling will always have an easier time being appealing to kids than adults. I was playing WWE 2K15 with 12-year-old nephew last week and of course he thinks Reigns and Brock are cool, but he also thinks Xavier Woods and Ziggler are cool. And when I've watched WWE with him, he's not complaining as much about storylines and plot points like we adults are complaining.
ReplyDeleteTrue, but this is a matter of wasted potential IMO -- shows can appeal to both kids and adults on an equal level. One of my favorite webseries was (and now that they've done revivals, is) Homestar Runner. I can see the appeal to kids and the good laughs, while still getting kicks out of how they wink to the adult that's watching. It's doable. And the fact that they're not is annoying, because we know it can be done and we don't think it's too hard a task.
ReplyDeleteI'd be more enthusiastic if I just knew how much they weighed.
ReplyDeleteSteph doesn't have power? What the what? Gimme a break dude. WWE TV has the fingerprints of "a lame middle-aged mom who hates professional wrestling and has no idea how to be a writer" all over it. This TV product comes off like a walking talking representation of Stephanie McMahon's every thought.
ReplyDeleteThey don't even need to bring the champion or belt back to do that. It would literally hurt nothing to have had the Authority upset that Lesnar has walked away with the belt, and the show each week could have revolved around them pushing the roster to rise up, figure out who is the best, and send them after Lesnar every few months to try and bring the title back. Build it all to Reigns or whoever winning the Rumble and facing Brock at Mania. The Authority vs. Lesnar makes sense. The Authority vs. Cena because ??? makes no sense. And when "makes no sense" is stacked upon more "makes no sense" the week after, and the week after that, eventually more and more fans just stop caring.
ReplyDeleteTonight's RAW looked like an arena full of fans who've stopped caring. I mean when they can't even work up a decent CM Punk chant...
SWERVE!!!
ReplyDeleteHa! This is Vince. Every nugget we hear is Vince. Cena crushing the Wyatt Family was ALL Vince, remember? And the infamously misogynist Vince would not listen to Stephanie in Creative. As Bayless has noted, she's a corporate strategist now -- not a writer.
ReplyDeleteI'm really surprised HHH didn't add himself to Team Authority. Kayfabe-wise it goes against everything the HHH character is about. His character is the type of person who only trusts himself to do the job right.
ReplyDeleteI don't think HHH the person wants to share in the blame--- as a "wrestling draw" at least--- for the epically bad subscription number that's gonna come out of Survivor Series.
ReplyDeleteWhen "free HHH PPV main event" still leads to a giant loss of subscriber numbers, it makes it harder for HHH to pretend he's still a draw.
She's the boss's daughter and the person inheriting the company. Saying she barely has any power is nuts when her opinion is probably the second most important (whether she day to day runs the writing staff or not) in the company.
ReplyDeleteYes, Vince is a senile old man who has completely lost it and has zero finger on today's pulse. 100%.
But the Stephanie McMahon factor shines through bright and clear. The lame middle aged mom who has always resisted pro wrestling standards is apparent in every aspect of current WWE production and booking.
I literally have zero interest in seeing who the bunny is.
ReplyDeleteDidn't you say they were fighting at TLC?
ReplyDeleteTrue. Santino pulled off his comedy mid card shtick for what, 6-7 years? Ambrose would be lucky to last half that long.
ReplyDeleteTriple H not adding himself to Team Authority is like #78 on the list of things illogical about the entire storyline.
ReplyDeleteAnd I stand by it until proven otherwise. It's what I think makes the most sense.
ReplyDeleteIt's Sting
ReplyDeleteBatista over D-von in singles
ReplyDeleteWouldn't Rollins face Orton?
ReplyDeleteSee my How I'd Book It. I would save that for WM31.
ReplyDeleteI will say that over the last 2-3 weeks I've noticed Ambrose has been more bad-actor "crazy" than he's been subtle-brilliance off-kilter. It's very possible he's been told the future plans for him and is mailing it in.
ReplyDeleteThoughts from an uneducated someone who hasn't seen any of the build. A light card main evented by a Survivor Series Elimination Tag featuring John Cena with Triple H and Stephanie heavily involved. That at least means this match should get plenty of time which means it could be the best SS Elimination Tag in a Decade.
ReplyDeleteAmbrose is probably going to be a top star at some point by sheer level of talent. They rarely have guys main event pay per views once and then give up on them. I think he's gonna be Shawn to Reigns' Diesel. They'll try Reigns for a while, but he'll bomb and Ambrose will continue working his ass off in the midcard until he gets another shot.
ReplyDeletePossible. But there's not many workrate-happy guys in the match. Cena, Ziggler on his side, Rollins on the other. That works against it.
ReplyDeleteYour How You Book It has Sting facing Shawn Michaels.
ReplyDeleteYou're right on the advantage, but I can accept Rowan joining them because Cena would have taken anyone on his side at that point. Yeah Rowan attacked him during the spring, but right now he's there and willing to help Cena when he needs anybody. It's a stretch but it works.
ReplyDeleteThat was the stupidest fucking thing I've seen in a long time.
ReplyDeleteFandango defeats Adam Rose. Rose blames the Bunny and pulls off the head to reveal Sami Zayn.
ReplyDeleteGotta disagree here; as somebody mentioned below, Zayn is in a featured matchup at the next big NXT show; linking him to Rose in this kind of capacity is a step down. Somebody already known to the general fanbase -- DY or even Ryder -- would be the better fit.
If Randy Orton doesn't return and RKO every motherfucker in that ring, heel and face alike, to close out Survivor Series, I'm calling the whole PPV a fail on principle.
ReplyDelete(Why?
ReplyDeleteWhy are you turning Adam Rose heel? And why are you turning him
heel on a member of his entourage? I'm certain this is Kevin Dunn's
fault.)
Sigh.
I know, right? Remember when Mick Foley was trying to comfort Vince in the hospital... or when he threw Rock a 'this is your life' party? By gum, his career never recovered.
ReplyDeleteOh god is that a real thing? Wow...
ReplyDeleteNot to beat a dead horse but I saw this shit coming from a mile away when HHH was still the focal point of the show after wrestlemania. They have to be the center of the entire show and it is killing the product. If HHH wants to be the top guy then he needs to come back as a full time wrestler.
ReplyDeleteOne day we will have a raw that is a three hour HHH promo.
ReplyDeleteDid You Know: It has been 13 years since the last time the fate of Stephanie McMahon's control of the company was put up for grabs in a Survivor Series match.
ReplyDeleteIt's Dragon Dragon.
ReplyDeleteYou know who should be doing Ambroses whacky prankster bit? The big show. He's already whatever he is and he's actually pretty funny so maybe he could have fun with it. Then you do something more appropriate with Ambrose.
ReplyDeleteRAW's ratings were all downhill after This Is Your Life.
ReplyDeleteBecause doing the most demeaning act on RAW is better than doing the most important thing on NXT.
ReplyDeleteThe match ain't happening!
ReplyDeleteWell, in non-horrendous Raw news, Austin's podcast this week is him doing commentary on the submission match at WrestleMania 13 against Bret Hart, like he did for the match against The Rock at X-Seven. Should be as great as that one was.
ReplyDeleteIt would be cool but it would also make orton extremely popular and extremely over so they wont do it.
ReplyDelete"Do you think there's any chance of telling you my master plan if you could stop it? I began things 35 minutes ago."
ReplyDelete*Fry squint*
That's a ridiculous comparison.
ReplyDeleteIt's lita
ReplyDeleteYou can tell things are dire when the blog is clamoring for Orton to show up.
ReplyDeleteOkay, Daniel Bryan then.
ReplyDeleteLost title match quickly at Mania. Moved down the card and put into a tag team with Kane with a ridiculous gimmick. Got it over so much that he made his way back up the card. And unlike Ambrose, Bryan didn't get a upper mid-card feud with plenty of air-time.
My point is if the talent is good enough, they can stay over. Foley did, Bryan did, Ambrose probably will too.
Nah, people here are hipsters. They'll pop for Bryan and then within an hour say he's being buried. They'll say Ziggler's being buried when he's involved in the company's top angle too. It's their way. Can't enjoy wrestling because of endless nitpicks.
ReplyDeleteHow I'd book the Team Authority win on Sunday:
ReplyDeleteIt comes down to Cena and Ziggler vs. Rollins, Rusev and Harper. Rusev eliminates Cena, planting the seed for their WrestleMania feud and leaving Ziggler to go 1-on-3 as the last chance for Team Cena. Ziggler does his best Shawn Michaels impersonation and takes out Harper (so he doesn't have that IC title loss hanging over his head as he moves to main-event status), and then after getting all he can handle from Ziggler, Rusev eliminates himself via DQ (since I'm sure they want to keep Rusev undefeated for Cena). That leaves Ziggler vs. Rollins, but a valiant Ziggler loses due to HHH interference.
Now I'd like to say this leads to a red-hot Ziggler beating Rollins at TLC and then challenging Brock at Royal Rumble. But since it looks like Cena is cemented in that title shot, I'll go with Ziggler vs. HHH at the Rumble, with Ziggler also participating in the Rumble itself as it will have very few legit contenders.
I could see Rowan and Harper taking each other out on Sunday -- brawling to the back and never being heard from the rest of the night. Why are the feuding? Well, because ...
ReplyDeleteThat surprises me as I'd have thought Bret would want to stay a face at that time no matter what.
ReplyDeleteIn this case he was turned too soon, and having him win the title at anything other than a big show was a waste. Then again, I liked crazy Bob and would have liked to see him last until the rumble at least. Do the Diesel victory there, then the win over HBK at mania, then summerslam is him going over Bret because one job isn't going to hurt you hit man. Next month or so you do a tag of some sort with Bigelow or Luger (depending on who is doing the turn) double crossing him to set up a match for the survivor series where Diesel drops the belt to them.
ReplyDelete"Why? Why are you turning Adam Rose heel? And why are you turning him heel on a member of his entourage? I'm certain this is Kevin Dunn's fault."
ReplyDeleteYou are a... how do they say? Complete-o Idiota.
You care way too much mate. What if your blogs had 10x as many readers like some other sites? Would you go through every comment "calling out" every person with something negative to say?
ReplyDeleteFuck off AndyPG.
ReplyDeleteWho's left the site Andy? Will it be you? You obviously don't havd the stomach for this. You're a sensitive man.
ReplyDeleteThe winner of the house sold it for a tidy profit.
ReplyDeleteWhy do you bother responding in the comments? You make an absolute fool of yourself. Write your review and back away. You really come off like a whiny turd.
ReplyDelete"Why? Why are you turning Adam Rose heel?"
ReplyDeleteWhy was he a face to begin with? A character like that just SCREAMS douchebag heel.
If Raw was two hours, and they still had significant mid-card and secondary title feuds, all the Cena/Authority stuff on this show could have been the entire build up to the main event over 4 weeks. The pacing would have been better, anticipation would actually get built up, they could add smaller promos for individual team members to actually move forward. Instead it's just wasting time with Orton (who isn't in the match) and everybody doing the same things multiple times.
ReplyDeleteWell, I did watch the first 2 hours (Was dead tired and stopped after the Show/Sheamus match, I agree with you all that 3 hours is just too much)
ReplyDeleteBut I did like most of the show. Pretty much the only bad stuff was the Grumpy Cat, but those were kept short and harmless. When I saw Ryback/Cesaro, i felt bad for Cesaro at first, but I was glad they gave him lots of offense. I don't think they've totally given up on him, he's just in the temporary dog house.
And this PPV could be a turning point for Ziggler's career, they're giving him the ball here it seems. Hope he's not casually the 1st guy eliminated or something, I hope he at least makes a deep run.
The word is Lemon.
ReplyDeleteCause the WWE machine just hates Orton, and would never ever push him strong, AMIRITE??
ReplyDeleteI think Bret fancied himself as a hero, but at the same time he was a pro and willing to do anything the office asked of him, plus in his matches with Diesel, Bret played it like he was a heel despite being a face so it seemed like he was willing to go the route if he thought it was good for business.
ReplyDeleteReading the comments below... Are people actually clamoring for HHH *AND* Randy Orton to be added to a main event PPV match? The world has officially ended. Pigs are flying, and it's snowing in hell.
ReplyDeleteFive minutes, and less, can do a lot to promote matches and wrestlers if used right.
ReplyDeletehttp://m.youtube.com/watch?v=M7yLbfNywhI
http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=c1AGjIQKxNE
http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=oESVMyJ20Ik
http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=IXiUx_t3luU
I always felt it was too soon for Diesel and Shawn to headline WM together as Shawn only started getting main event credibility after WM. If I could change things, I would have had Bret win the title back at the Rumble from Backlund and Diesel winning the Rumble match, then at WM, Bret puts Diesel over as the next big thing then Diesel can work with Shawn at Summerslam.
ReplyDeleteI think you're being a wee bit harsh on the Ryback v Cesaro match. It was entertaining enough and a nice big man power match.
ReplyDeleteI reckon it wasn't a squash because they're trying to build up Ryback's ring conditioning a bit, so that he can last more than 3 minutes (ooh-err, missus!) before blowing up completely. Not sure how successful that will be, right enough.
As for Adam Rose - the character is BORN to be a heel. Team him up with Fandango and you've got an instant douchbag tag-team to use for putting over face teams.
I was secretly hoping someone from NXT would be the fourth (ie: non-Ryback) member of Team Cena - if Zayn had come out instead of Rowan, I'd have marked like a kid. Rowan's an interesting inclusion, though. I predict he and Harper will end up double-count-outing each other.
The really interesting bit is what they do with Rusev. Having him eliminated in Battle Royals or a Rumble is one thing, but he's not been pinned yet and he's built up a lot of momentum to risk throwing away in a SS match. Hmm.
The weather is bad for me as well.
ReplyDeleteAgree with you completely. The bunny should be used to re-package someone existing (Justin Gabriel, perhaps?) - if someone like Zayn debuts in that sort of feud, he'll struggle badly to rise above that level in the eyes of the crowd.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I was actually surprised at how well Ryback handled himself in a long match. He actually impressed me.
ReplyDeleteAnd I didn't pay attention to the bunny's "twerking", I just liked how he learned from the past few weeks, and knew than an attack was coming, so he was able to avoid it this time. Smart bunny!
I'd throw Harper into that category - he's a superb worker. I've said for a while he's the new Kane - a safe pair of hands, but a big big guy who can be an instant threat in any situation. Doesn't need to be a WHC (although that would be interesting), but he's the sort of "team player" the fed needs.
ReplyDeleteWhomever is champion at the time draws the house. Unless HHH is working that night, then he probably drew it.
ReplyDeleteIt's gonna be bad....
ReplyDeleteI'd quite happily never see Orton (or Sheamus, for that matter) bore up the main event ever again.
ReplyDeleteI don't think it's that people are clamouring - they know it's going to happen, they're just trying to predict when.
The IWC nerds would be hopping mad over his treatment.
ReplyDeleteNot if you're counting the Linear title.
ReplyDeleteWhile watching the Ziggler beatdown, I naturally thought there was some sort of rule/stipulation that Cena wasn't allowed to get involved. Is that the case? Because if he just stayed back.... Then he's kind of a jerk, I must admit.
ReplyDeleteI think a Diesel vs Shawn feud would have hurt Diesel. He was booed at Mania against Shawn, it only would've gotten worse.
ReplyDeleteI'm fine with that.
ReplyDeleteBut if there's no match, the stipulation is null and void, and the AUTHORITAH keeps power!! WON'T YOU THINK OF THE CHILDREN??
ReplyDeleteI think if they literally went to Bret and said "Look, as a face you can feud with Hakushi, Pierre, Yankem, Lawler and Backlund or you can go heel and feud with Diesel, Shawn Michaels and Razor" he'd take the heel offer.
ReplyDeleteAnd she lost that one.
ReplyDeleteYes! Something he doesn't defend. Just wait till the show is over, Cena is being a very big star.
ReplyDeleteI hate hate HATED that she was the "billion dollar princess" for 2 years, and was dragged away kicking and screaming after WM 18....
ReplyDeleteOnly to come back maybe 2 months later as the Calm, cool and professional GM of SmackDown... NOPE! Sorry, not buying it! Totally typecast as the spoiled bitch, NOT BUYING IT.
The fact his team is "Team Cena" instead of more of a unified banner ("Team WWE Universe" or some nonsense) says it's All About Cena.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it's a prelude to a heel turn. He'll lie down for a Fingerpoke of Doom from Rusev, and defect to The Authority.
;)
He really is in a "cant' win" scenario though. If he doesn't make the save, he's a selfish jerk, but every time he did make the save for Daniel Bryan last year, it was all "Oh great, Cena is here to leach off of Daniel's heat!! Daniel can't defend himself, HERE IS SUPER CENA TO SAVE HIM!!"
ReplyDeletehaha, Hogan was always like that too. Always "The Hulkamaniacs"
ReplyDeleteYou know, as I rep #TeamAuthority, it's probably none of my business, but I find Cena's vetting process and standards highly suspect.
ReplyDeleteThe possibly-retarded stalker and stuffed animal enthusiast in a sheep mask wanders down to ringside and Cena's first thought is "HE'S ON MY TEAM?"
Taking Sheamus out of the match leaves a huge question mark for Rusev, because I think a lot of people assumed he would be the victim of a double countout on Sunday. Now, it's more likely Harper and Rowan eliminate each other, Ryback turns on Cena at the end of the match and Rusev and Rollins win the match.
ReplyDeleteHe was only booed because Shawn wanted to steal his heat. Bret showed the Diesel could work with smaller opponents and look sympathetic in the process.
ReplyDelete" Cena will go to war with four fans if he wants!
ReplyDelete(And he even asks if the crowd wants it.) He looks for four good
team members, picking random audience members to say he'll fight with
the crowd on his side."
Chanelling Team Piper from 1997, with the Boxer, the Kickboxer and John Tenta!!
That's sort of how I see it too, tbh.
ReplyDeleteOr we'll see Orton show up and distract Rollins for a "protected" loss via distraction (or just running away), meaning it comes down to Rusev and Cena, with Rusev snatching the win after some sort of shenanigans, setting up their big feud.
Nah, they've hyped Rollins up too much for even that "protected" loss. I think it benefits Rollins much more to get this main event win at Survivor Series.
ReplyDeleteI'd like to think that too, but it's the WWE. Sense doesn't always come into it. ;)
ReplyDeleteIt's interesting to note, however, that hardly anyone believes Ryback will actually be the difference-maker in the match, despite how he's been built up in the last couple of weeks.
I want to make more accounts just to upvote this more.
ReplyDeleteThe hilarious thing is that they showed footage of Ryback being pissed at Cena for not helping him when the odds were stacked against him by a mutual foe (for which Cena mocked him) at the start of the damn show.
ReplyDeleteThey're trolling EVERYONE at this point ;)
"The Authority vs Cena because ???" and still no acknowledgement that Cena's on-screen girlfriend sold out to the Authority and he couldn't care less. I appreciate the tough spot WWE might have been in in 2014 when Punk, Bryan and Reigns, three certain focal points of the shows this year, all dropped out, but the efforts at dealing with their absences have been woeful.
ReplyDeleteDepends on the definition of "difference maker" - because when it's revealed that the Authority set up Ryback to be on Team Cena as an insurance policy, I think it keeps the focus on The Big Guy.
ReplyDeleteTrue dat!
ReplyDeleteI'm actually quite looking forward to SS this year. It's actually got a decent story around it.
The lack of Lesnar is a glaring hole, though, and the fact it's not been addressed at all smacks of them not actually having a clue how to deal with an absent champion.
If people who hated this product walked away and completely washed their hands of it, Scott would walk away, this blog wouldn't exist and neither would this column.
ReplyDeleteThat actually made sense, didn't it? It was the Authority digging up old dirt, to try to talk Ryback out of joining Cena's team?
ReplyDeleteI've been watching some 2013 stuff that I missed at the time, and he was so good at the sleazy-creepy JUST on the right side of psycho killer. That's not a great character for a face admittedly, but they only needed to tweak that character, not turn it upside down into Captain Wacky Dean Ambrose.
ReplyDeleteThere can only be one difference maker on that team, and that is FATU!!
ReplyDeleteit would actually be a neat callback to when Orton was celebrating a Survivor Series win and Undertaker came out and destroyed everyone.
ReplyDeleteI don't know, I think it's smart to not address him too much. Why would you actively remind everyone over and over and over that your champ isn't there? Watch Survivor Series, but the champ is totally not there!
ReplyDeleteRaw's roster IS very poor. He should have just grabbed four NXT guys and had a punt at making instant stars out of all of them.
ReplyDeleteI was about to post how I enjoyed this week's review much more because for once Andy didn't act like a total martyr who takes every negative comment about Raw as a personal attack.
ReplyDeleteThen I read the comments...
Yeah, it made sense for THEM to do it.
ReplyDeleteBut it highlighted the fact that Cena doesn't help out his own team even further!
SEEDS OF DOUBT!!! Will Ryback forgive and forget? OR will he hold a grudge? TUNE IN TO NITRO URRR SURVIVOR SERIES TO FIND OUT!!
ReplyDeleteYeah, that's a fair point - but at the same time, they're advertising Heyman for the pre-show!
ReplyDeleteHell, even have a taped section where Lesnar explains that his must-compete timescale is on hold due to a special deal with the Authority (which gives the face team even more reason to win, but also gives the Authority some extra heel heat). I dunno, something would be better than nothing, especially after such a song and dance was made about the 30-day clause within the last year or so! :)
What's Ryan Back doing in the Impact Zone?!?!?
ReplyDeleteThe house was in Orlando, FL. Good spot to have a vacation home. Now if the house was in Buffalo or Cleveland then that would be a problem.
ReplyDeleteYeah, but it's just giving someone a bunch of monthly bills. You've gotta insure that bad boy, pay your property taxes, upkeep...
ReplyDeleteAmbrose is done dude.
ReplyDeleteYou psyched for his Survival Kit bit on Friday? Apparently he wrote it with Carrot Top's personal assistant.
I'll just take cash in the first place.
ReplyDeleteYep, that could maybe be done. But for now, it's all about the 10 man tag. (For example, in October 1996, the champ HBK wasn't even on the card, the main event was the first Buried Alive match. They hyped a #1 contenders match with Sid vs Vader, but almost no talk about the champ. )
ReplyDeleteI'd be down for a Luke Harper/Dolph Ziggler program.
ReplyDeleteRyback-Cesaro reminded me of the Reigns-Del Rio match from Smackdown over the summer.
ReplyDeleteAs Reigns' singles push started to take off, people were concerned that he couldn't hold his own in a 1-on-1 match longer than five minutes. WWE threw him out there with Del Rio and Reigns had his first really good singles match. (Which didn't silence Reigns' critics, but at least WWE was making the effort.)
Now they're pushing Ryback (again), and the knock on him from his last main-event run is that he can't work anything longer than a squash. So they throw him out there this week with Cesaro -- who like Del Rio during his last few months in WWE is stuck in a "good worker, no storyline" rut -- and he makes Ryback look pretty good.
Seems like a lot of you watched the show even though a cat was on camera for 5 minutes. What a surprise.
ReplyDelete"Tomorrow's a big day for video games, isn't it?"
ReplyDeleteUnless you're a Nintendo fan, in which case the big day this week is Friday.
Cool bro
ReplyDeleteFollowed by Resthold 2: All Blown Up.
ReplyDeleteThat would have been very awesome and cross promoted a network show. I think they kinda missed out there.
ReplyDeleteThey'd jump all over creative for that one.
ReplyDelete