Sunday, April 26, 2015

The SmarK Rant for WWE Extreme Rules 2015

The SmarK Rant for WWE Extreme Rules 2015

Live from Chicago, IL

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler & JBL

To say there’s no buzz about this show would be a gross understatement.

Chicago Street Fight: Dean Ambrose v. Luke Harper

They brawl outside immediately and Dean hits him with a dive, although Cole clarifies that you have to pin your opponent inside the ring. So even in a no-rules street fight, there is in fact SOME rules. I mean, you wouldn’t want anarchy. Ambrose grabs a kendo stick and beats on Harper with that, but he gets suplexed onto an open chair in a spot that probably isn’t good for the longevity of his back. Harper beats on him with the kendo stick and drops him on another chair in the corner for two. Ambrose comes back with a slam onto the chair and a tornado DDT, and the crowd wants tables. Please, it’s not the properly approved PPV for tables yet. You might as well chant for stairs while you’re at it. Ambrose with the flying clothesline for two, but Harper counters the lariat with a big boot and they end up on the floor again. Ambrose chases him to the entrance with a kendo stick and we travel into the locker room and backstage area. Harper jumps into someone’s car and steals it, and Ambrose dives in after him as the match is apparently on hiatus at 8:30 or so. Apparently car theft laws are also suspended under the Extreme Rules banner. Nothing really to the match. **

Meanwhile, Seth Rollins continues to squabble with Kane in a segment that feels like it’s 10 minutes long.

Kiss Me Arse match: Sheamus v. Dolph Ziggler

Yes, they actually paid people to come up with this match stipulation. Ziggler really builds that heat here by making fun of Sheamus and his Mohawk on Twitter. Greg Valentine v. Wahoo McDaniel it ain’t. I will say, Sheamus’s new music is BADASS. I will also say that I will not be using the hashtag “KissMeArse” to discuss this match on social media. Ziggler slugs away in the corner and they head to the floor right away, but Sheamus beats on him while Jerry Lawler wonders if either guy has washed their ass in preparation for the match. Well, JBL would be the expert on THAT. Back in, Sheamus goes to a chinlock and then blocks the fameasser with a powerbomb for two. Sheamus puts him down with a pair of short-arm clotheslines and goes back to the chinlock while deriding short people. Just to be clear here, in WWE-land Ziggler is NOT tall? Because that seems weird. Ziggler slugs out, giving us our first “creating separation” of the night, but Sheamus pounds him down again and hooks the Cloverleaf. Ziggler gets a nice counter into a rollup for two and a superkick gets two. Sheamus gets the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker (which Cole is now calling the Irish Curse, something like the third or fourth move to get that name) and goes for the Brogue Kick, but Ziggler counters into a rollup for two, and a small package finishes at 9:25. This was fine, didn’t really go anywhere though and lacked a big heat sequence or climax. The crowd was shockingly into the stupid stip, however. **1/2 Seems really early to blow off the heat on Sheamus, but that’s the WWE midcard in 2015 for you. And as usual they renege on the stip, as Sheamus lays out Dolph with a low blow and Brogue Kicks him instead, then shoves Dolph’s face into his ass.

This week on the WWE Network, a bunch of crappy shows that no human being would possibly want to watch. Like really, a retrospective about Mayweather v. Big Show? Gee, I wonder why they’re suddenly reminiscing about that match? I thought PPV was dead! Although apparently King of the Ring is coming back, so there’s that.

WWE tag titles: Cesaro & Tyson Kidd v. The New Day

The Brass Ring Club are the clear babyfaces here. Tyson controls Kofi and gets a backslide for two, and Cesaro comes in for a slam on Big E and a double stomp for two. They fight to the floor with Tyson getting a nice somersault dive on Kofi, but the New Day double-teams him to take over. Kofi with a dropkick for two as the crowd is unsure what to chant for the champions. Big E misses a charge and lands on the floor, it’s hot tag Cesaro. He throws uppercuts on Kofi in the corner and gets a clothesline for two, but tries the Giant Swing and Kofi escapes to the top rope. Cesaro suplexes him and Kidd drops the elbow for two. Big E comes back in with the spear off the apron and it’s BONZO GONZO, but Kidd blocks Kofi’s wacky kick and hooks the Sharpshooter. Big E breaks it up with a suplex on Kidd, but Cesaro cleans up and gets the Giant Swing on Kofi. Cesaro gets distracted with Woods, however, and Kofi rolls him up for the pin and the titles at 9:40. Good double-team stuff here, but the finish was pretty bad. Still, Kidd and Cesaro are on another level of awesome right now. So of course they jobbed. ***1/2 I feel like we’re through the looking glass now, in an era where they talk about how the promotion is all about entertaining the fans and then they push guys who are defined by how much people hate watching them.

Meanwhile, the New Day’s victory promo is interrupted by Dean Ambrose crashing into the arena with the stolen vehicle, as they continue the match.

Dean Ambrose v. Luke Harper, Part 2

Back to the ring as both guys grab some chairs from under the ring and Harper powerbombs him on one for two. He buries Ambrose in chairs and goes up, and there’s already a million logical problems with that one, but Ambrose slams him off and hits the Dirty Deeds for the pin. Did that really need the 30 minute break? I mean, it’s kind of a clever idea, but it’s not like it made for a better match or anything.

US title, Russian Chain Match: John Cena v. Rusev

Rusev attacks in the corner and touches two corners, but Cena quickly touches three before Rusev cuts him off. Rusev dumps him and ties him in the ropes for some punishment, then back in for two corners. There’s a major issue here in that the chain is WAY too long to build drama. The guys are just walking around the ring touching the corners, without having to sell the drama of dragging the other guy around. Cena runs Rusev into the post and touches two corners, but Rusev beats him down with the chain. At this point the announcers discuss what an underdog that Cena is, because this is Rusev’s match. A match that has never been broadcast on WWE TV before and thus is Rusev’s first time. They’re kind of contradicting themselves there. They keep hitting each other with weak shots from the chain as this has no drama to it, and the crowd is so bored that they chant for Lana. Lana waves at them, which angers Rusev and he sends her back to the dressing room. So now Cena comes back after 10 minutes of nothing and hooks the STF. And…? This match is STUPID. Cena touches two and now Rusev gets the Accolade. Again I ask, and…? Cena powers out and runs Rusev into a pair of corners, which light up for Rusev, but Cena cuts him off with the FU. Both guys are down and they crawl around the ring touching corners and then Cena gives him another FU and touches the fourth to retain at 13:33. Just because Eddie Guerrero had one good “touch all four” match 11 years ago doesn’t mean we need to ever see it again. **

WWE Divas title: Nikki Bella v. Naomi

Apparently Naomi is now a Sasha Banks-esque heel and Nikki is the babyface. Because reasons. WWE: Where we’re telling stories, except when we’re too lazy to actually tell the story. Naomi controls with a chinlock and drops an elbow for two, but Nikki rolls her up for two. Naomi bulldogs her into the turnbuckle for two and a kick out of the corner for two. Nikki mounts the comeback, but Naomi gets the butt splash for two. A moonsault misses, but Naomi escapes the Rack Attack and rolls her up for two. Nikki gets a jumping kick out of the corner for two and Brie adds a shot from the outside, and the Rack Attack finishes at 7:15. This is apparently shocking behavior to the announcers. Dull and way too long. With AJ and Paige gone there’s literally nothing left in this division of interest. *1/2

Meanwhile, Rusev yells at Lana in Russian, and she goes to see the Authority.

Last Man Standing: Roman Reigns v. The Big Show

Roman slugs away on the Human Pee Break and dumps him before grabbing a table, but Big Show shoves it back under the ring in a cute spot. Reigns hits the apron kick and gets another table, but this time Big Show uses his frying pan sized hands to break it. Roman grabs a kendo stick, but Show slugs him down and breaks that, too. So that’s where all their budget on the Network went to – replacing needlessly broken weapons. Show punches Reigns down, but he grabs a chair and beats on Show with that. See, but we already had all the chair spots in the street fight, so why drag them out again on the same show? Reigns grabs a pair of tables, but Show hits the KO punch and Roman is up at 8. Show tries a chokeslam onto the table, but Reigns gets a samoan drop through it and Show is up at 8. Show with a spear for an 8 count and he goes up with a pump splash that misses by a foot and still gets an 8 count. My god, if that splash had actually made contact, Reigns would be DEAD! They slowly lumber to the top rope and Reigns goes down, but comes back and slams Show off. Two superman punches follow, but Show blocks a third and chokeslams him through a pair of tables at ringside. Luckily, Roman is up at 9. Show charges and goes through a table for 8, but bails to the floor and Reigns spears him through the barricade. Show is up at 9 and goes to the announce table, so Reigns spears him from one table to another and buries him under the Spanish announce table rubble to win at 19:45. Probably as good as you were going to get out of this, although the stalling early hurt it a lot and you’ve gotta wonder how many crazy beatings that they can put Reigns through in order to make up for their lousy booking of him. ***1/4

Bo Dallas joins us to tell us how smelly that Chicago is. You tell ‘em, Bo! Sadly, Ryback does not Bo-lieve and comes out to beat him up.

And then to waste more time, we get ANOTHER WWE Network commercial.

Meanwhile, Rusev announces that he’s facing John Cena AGAIN next month, this time in an I Quit match. Come on, really, four PPVs in a row? Why not continue Cena’s open challenge with a mystery opponent or something more interesting?

WWE World title: Seth Rollins v. Randy Orton

This show has really been dragging since the tag title match so hopefully this is quick. Seth tries to run right away and Orton pulls him down and slugs away. Rollins climbs for it again and Orton slugs away in the corner, but Rollins powerbombs him for two. They keep kicking and punching and Seth gets a clothesline for two as the crowd completely dies off. Orton makes a comeback and Rollins keeps trying to run away, then hits Orton with the flying knee off the top rope for two. Orton comes back with the powerslam for two, but Rollins escapes the draping DDT and gets a superkick for two. They fight to the top again and try to escape, but now J&J Security comes out to interfere in the match where no one can interfere, and Rollins is saved. Kane tells them to get lost and Orton takes over on Rollins again with the draping DDT, and a Pedigree for two. Orton tries to go for the door and Kane won’t let him out, but then Rollins goes for the door and he slams it in his face, too. So now Kane and J&J all head into the cage, where no interference can possibly happen, and Kane chokeslams the security geeks and then Orton and Rollins as well. I don’t even understand what the motivation is supposed to be at this point. Kane puts Rollins on top for two, but Orton gives Kane an RKO and then Rollins gives Orton an RKO and exits the cage to retain at 21:04. Well that was definitely not quick. Or particularly good. **1/2 So apparently due to controversy, this feud MUST CONTINUE. Because otherwise what would they fill time with?

The Pulse

Nothing bad tonight, although the cage match was a boring letdown and took the show down from thumbs up territory for me. I didn’t regret the three hours, particularly, so I’d call it thumbs in the middle tonight.

Check out my rundown of the show at the Sporting News as well:

http://www.sportingnews.com/sport/story/2015-04-27/wwe-extreme-rules-2015-wwe-network-seth-rollins-randy-orton-big-show-roman-reigns

254 comments:

  1. Why did you bother watching a show you had zero interest in?

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  2. Because he's paid to do it.

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  3. John Cena I Quit matches are quite possibly the worst thing ever.

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  4. Because he's getting it for free? By that I mean, Scott happily pays for a Raw archive and old ppv archive and NXT episodes and gets these dumb ppvs for free.

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  5. I made this joke in the live thread, but is Ambrose's win tonight his first TV win since the Shield broke up? I feel like it is.

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  6. First PPV win since, yes

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  7. I don't particularly dislike John Cena; quite the contrary. I think he's pretty damn good. However, he never sells like he was just in a "war" after his matches, and that bothers me. Hand raised, smile, salute, walk away.

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  8. All the ppvs are the same. Rollins shouldn't have been defending the title here against anyone. They should have done something like Cena/Reigns/Ambrose v. Rollins/Show/Kane, in a cage or a street fight or some other crazy stip. Maybe a team eliminaiton chamber? Rusev could do something else to get his heat back (beat Ryback?) and Rollins can eat a fall to Regins where he doesn't lose the belt (like he did on Smackdown). I mean, yes it happened on Smackdown but no one remembers that.

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  9. Because Scott always does a rant on PPVs?

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  10. I forgot all about the show. Wound up playing Red Faction: Guerrilla most of the night.


    From the sounds of it, it was time better spent.

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  11. "I didn’t regret the three hours"

    If I was getting money for half-assed reviews with a "check out" link at the end, I wouldn't either. More fool me for thinking this might be up to the old standard.

    As a reader since 1998, I'm done with your writing.

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  12. Thanks for coming.

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  13. Extant1979 - Extreme SuperstarApril 26, 2015 at 11:24 PM

    He does?

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  14. He's been doing it recently, but he wasn't doing a rant on PPVs when he wasn't watching.

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  15. Why waste the three hours?

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  16. I finally caught the opener between Barrett and Neville earlier. Neville doesn't just have great offense, but he sells moves like death! He made Barrett's moves look good!

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  17. Nothing bad tonight?

    This show stuck

    The pure wrestling aspect was horrible

    And

    If you are doing an extreme show. With no blood. No big huge intense spots. It doesn't add very well to the fact that this sport is fake!

    Here is my extreme head lock!

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  18. Extant1979 - Extreme SuperstarApril 26, 2015 at 11:28 PM

    Had the show on my phone as background noise while I was at work, though I may have been paying more attention to the Yankees-Mets game.

    Nothing really unexpected, kind of annoyed New Day won, skipped the Divas match entirely. Thumbs definitely in the middle.

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  19. the problem with a rusev-cena i quit match is that cena never quits so we automatically lose all suspense for that match

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  20. Not sure if it's ever be said but, the small package should be the next move to be called The Irish Curse.

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  21. The other thing is, it's not like Rusev's come close to beating Cena the last couple of times, so why would we think he'd do any better next month?

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  22. These guys, probably.


    http://www.sportingnews.com/sport/story/2015-04-27/wwe-extreme-rules-2015-wwe-network-seth-rollins-randy-orton-big-show-roman-reigns

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  23. So far as I know, he's been doing it "recently" for the last few years now. Hasn't he?

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  24. Hasn't he? I swear a SK rant has dropped shortly after a PPV finished for quite awhile now.

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  25. Extant1979 - Extreme SuperstarApril 26, 2015 at 11:38 PM

    I feel like it's hit or miss outside of January through April. Not that anyone would blame him.

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  26. Google adsense.

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  27. Shouldn't WWE recaps be on an entertainment newz site, rather than sporting newz?

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  28. Lana could turn face, and then Rusev could threaten to smash her with a chain to get Cena to quit.

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  29. Cena vs Orton,one more timeApril 26, 2015 at 11:47 PM

    Well,at least Rusev still gets to bang Lana.

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  30. He's the envy of us all.

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  31. Theberzerker, #1 HUSS CHOMPIONApril 26, 2015 at 11:48 PM

    There hasn't been any (intentional) since 2008. Your anger is true, but it's never coming back and it's time to accept it.

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  32. For all we know, Lana fucks Russev with a strap on every night while they watch House Hunters International.

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  33. I don't know, I don't think he was doing the shows pre-network especially when he wasn't watching WWE.

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  34. Whoever wins KOTR needs to put King in front of their name. King Rusev sounds fucking bad ass.

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  35. Only if he goes by Czar Russev.

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  36. This PPV was so forgettable, I genuinely believe that at some point it will actually not have existed. Someone will bring up Extreme Rules 2015, and it will have ceased to be when they attempt to prove it. WWE single-handedly destroyed the space-time continuum tonight, and they don't know what they've done. Monsters.

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  37. That doesn't even make sense.

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  38. The tag titles had to have changed somehow!

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  39. I don't care for Tia Carrere's cover of Jimi, but she can still get it.

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  40. king kofi kingston has a nice ring to it

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  41. Or, King Korporate Kane.

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  42. So why the random and sort of hush-hush KOTR revival?

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  43. It will probably be Cena. It's the one thing he probably hasn't won.

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  44. http://media.247sports.com/Uploads/Boards/326/21326/36411.jpg

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  45. why not make the king of the ring into the king of the internet and make it into a wwe network exclusive title (where it only defended on the network)?

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  46. I wasn't blown away by anything (except maybe that the Show/Reigns match was any good), but I didn't hate anything, and that is much more than I expected of the show.



    What does Rusev do next month when he loses for the third PPV in a row? Join Bray Wyatt in the wasteland?


    Can we just dissolve the Diva's division all ready? At very least, make it a stepping stone to the Women's Championship, where actual decent wrestling happens?

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  47. That's real championship there.

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  48. Why wouldn't have Orton made the stip if any authority member interferes, Rollins loses the belt. No one ever interferes in cage matches.

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  49. This idea makes Zack Ryder cry.

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  50. No you are wrong

    Just because there hasn't been any good extreme matchs since whenever

    Doesn't mean you give praise to these fake matches Out of default.

    They should all still be compared to hardcore matches of the past.

    And as such. They all fail flat. Just like scotts review

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  51. so then kane gets "fired" from the authority and interferes anyway. Similar to the bossman lifting the briefcase

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  52. he hasn't won the divas title

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  53. Man, people dressed like dorks in the 90's.

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  54. has any undefeated guy ever had great booking after their first loss?

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  55. Thumbs leaning down for me. I just can't get behind anyone or anything right now, save Kidero and Nattys boobays.

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  56. I think Goldberg had the worst first loss

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  57. Wouldn't you be getting in front of Nattie's boobays, rather than behind?

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  58. The divas champ has layed down to him, and submitted to him.... so I count it.

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  59. I bet he plays his music after climax too.

    "BRRRRRRAPADOO!!"

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  60. In 15 years kids will be saying the same about now.

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  61. Kurt Angle did ok, but his undefeated streak wasn't that long.

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  62. Actually, I'm really not one to talk, since I really haven't changed my style since the 90's. Punk/metal/skate hoodie, jeans and skate shoes.

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  63. I had the thought all day that once he loses the US title he should get it in his head to go after the tag belts with a partner of his choice. Eventually they'll split and he'll do something he hasn't done which is put someone over at a mania that could actually use the rub. The guy has lost to The Rock, but he hasn't put anyone over on the biggest show of the year that could use the win to catapult them to the next level.

    Of course who that should be is the ultimate question. I'm not going to say someone like Dolph cause clearly the machine will never be behind him. If they keep booking Reigns right, maybe him.

    This of course pretending that they aren't probably using Cena for someone else at mania (three times in a lifetime? Cena/Taker?) but we're talking fantasy here.

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  64. Nikki Bella sucksss Nikki Bella sucksss

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  65. I think I read it was an adlib, and judging from Mike Myers reaction to Carvey asking him if he found Bugs Bunny in a dress attractive, it must be been.

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  66. Road Dogg's fanny pack would like a word with you

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  67. Well, yeah, why else would he keep her around?

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  68. I'm sure Cena hopes so.

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  69. "You can't see me".....while hittin' it from behind

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  70. "You can't see me....cause I blasted ya in the eye!"

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  71. Get back to your job at the petrol station.

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  72. No way he puts up with her if she don't

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  73. "I look at girls who don't give head, like they was a damn Betamax. Like, they still make you?!"

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  74. So he can pretend that the hatred is justified?, get clicks a couple bucks and further troll his audience

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  75. He's been having her hit the squat rack.

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  76. And then he can get a sex change to capitalize on Bruce Jenner and then win the diva title

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  77. Same here I honestly still wear shirts I wore in high school.

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  78. Jan Cena.

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  79. I wish I still had my Good Riddance Tim Hortons shirt.

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  80. Figure of speech?

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  81. HHH had a winning streak in 1995 and went onto become the biggest star during the Attitude era.

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  82. Really though I am literally *this* close to giving up on the main roster save for the mania's.

    At least there's still NXT

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  83. Well, you do need something to grab onto while you're hitting it from the rear.

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  84. Jane Cena, Joan Cena...or wear a mask and be....Juanita Cena

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  85. Didn't they try that with the miz at wm27?

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  86. Oh si si, he so handsome!

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  87. AAAAAAARIBADOO!!

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  88. Nice Chris Rock reference

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  89. I know the characters name is different but, Wayne's World and Married with Children are both set in Chicago. Al Bundy moonlighting at Stan Mikita's to avoid Peg as much as possible?

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  90. "She sucks dick like their was some Robitussin in it!"

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  91. Didn't watch but just reading I have to ask...how can it be anything but thumbs down?

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  92. Tag match was good, Show/Reigns was better than I expected...the rest was forgettable. Cena/Rusev and the main were pretty boring though.

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  93. Not sure about thumbs down, but between Lana and Nattie, something was definitely up.

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  94. "Broke your arm, put some 'Tussin on it."

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  95. "Run out of Tussin, put some water in the jar, shake it up! More Tussin!"

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  96. I can see the tag match being a decent match but they can't even get the winner right. Would it kill them to let the most over team in the company actually hold the belts for a few months?

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  97. I'm ok with New Day winning the titles. It makes sense for the heel turn if cheating gives them success plus I think there's money in the chase with Kidd and Cesaro in this case. And THIS is the match Reigns needed since returning. Hopefully they keep up this booking of him.

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  98. Didn't realize it when I was 12, but, Dana Carvey carries Wayne's World.

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  99. It certainly was

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  100. Virgil's Gimmick TableApril 27, 2015 at 1:07 AM

    That's the last time I tell you my masturbation fantasies in confidence.

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  101. I found the PPV to be very dull besides the tag title match and the pre show match. The main event was a real chore to get through.

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  102. Pretty lame show. But Show/Reigns turned out better than I anticipated.

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  103. король Rusev

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  104. Ultimate Warrior. He got to destroy Rude in the rematch, dominate a feud with Andre The Giant and give Hulk Hogan his first clean pinfall loss in nearly ten years. You can't have better booking than that.

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  105. Pretty dull show outside of the tag match, the Last Man Standing match and Natalya's outfit.
    Not great and not terrible, just dull and immediately forgettable, basically the wrestling equivalent of a First Look Studios movie.

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  106. In my opinion, the only thing people who feel like this need to do is only watch NXT on Hulu. I hate their "pay to watch commercials" act as much as anyone, but paying for the Network right now HAS to be sending mixed messages to WWE.

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  107. That outcome will disappear from the space-time continuum faster than the SSW Tag Team Titles.

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  108. The Ambrose/Harper match should have been full-on Crash TV and had multiple segments throughout the show. Like, the match slips outside and away from the arena. Cole then gets a report later that they're fighting somewhere outside the arena and we go to footage of them in, like, the Chicago subway or something. Then, back to the arena but they get interrupted by something. And finally big blow-off back in the ring.

    Either go Full Russo or don't do it at all. And yes, you should sometimes go Full Russo.

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  109. I totally feel like during an "extreme" show, during a dull moment like a rest hold or a spot where the referee is threatening to stop the match, they should show an inset promo of a fat guy shouting "EXTREME!". That would make the show a lot more hilarious and if they had done it eight years ago, the ECW brand would probably still be around today.

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  110. "King Korporate Kane, the special guest tonight on the Krusty Komedy Klassic!".

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  111. You should never go Full Russo.

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  112. Did foley and hhh do that at Canadian stampede?

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  113. Extant1979 - Extreme SuperstarApril 27, 2015 at 2:03 AM

    New Day are gonna be HUGE heels, especially if/when they throw in the Freebird defense rule. Might end up being a good payoff to see someone beat them.

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  114. How's Orton's enthusiasm going? Has he started phoning it in yet or is he still trying?

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  115. He also single handily won the Monday Night wars.

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  116. I found a photo of myself wearing jeans and a Batman symbol T-Shirt when I was 9 or 10, I still have that combo in my rotation now.

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  117. I think WWE missed a trick during the brief point Kane and Kelly Kelly were interacting.

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  118. Xavier Woods is far from the greatest ringside performer in the business, but I wish he could sit down with the Bellas for however long it takes to teach them something else to say besides "C'mon Nikki!" and "C'mon Brie!"

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  119. In IWW Sheamus called a kick to the balls by that name.

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  120. When they came back in the car, they should've had some more unexplained things going on. Like Harper should've been missing a chunk of his beard, or Ambrose should've been wearing a completely different pair of pants, or both guys should've had some third-party blood or oil or dirt or something on them.

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  121. 1. Roman Reigns may be underrated. I can only think of one PPV match he's had in which he wasn't impressive, and that was the 2015 Royal Rumble. Pretty much every other big match he's had, solo or with The Shield, he's delivered.


    2. Even when you suspend your disbelief, WWE's talking points about Big Show ring hollow because he simply hasn't been as dominant as they say he is. It's hindsight, but Show could still be a credible main-eventer in 2015 if earlier in his WWE tenure they'd really run with him as a long-term champion, had him win a couple Rumbles, and/or had him really dominate feuds against big guns like Rock, Austin, HHH, Taker, Brock, etc.

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  122. A better use of Ryback would've been to have him save Ziggler and start a feud with Sheamus.

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  123. "Why would you SAY that?" got a smile from me during the tag match.

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  124. Burt Macklin, Man Without FearApril 27, 2015 at 3:37 AM

    I disagree. Both his JBL and Orton I Quit Matches are insanely great.

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  125. Burt Macklin, Man Without FearApril 27, 2015 at 3:39 AM

    Not so nice on the initials though!

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  126. I'd suggest a "C'mon Nikki/Brie" drinking game for the Bellas' next PPV match, but people would die.

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  127. If they let Rusev just be a bad guy and not a Russian Bad Guy, they can do a lot more with him. Not every babyface has to represent America when they fight him. After Cena-Rusev IV, they could feud Rusev with a babyface who can afford a loss. Maybe Orton?

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  128. Is she still hot?

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  129. Is this a face turn John?

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  130. All the Lesnar matches had blood, as far as I can remember...

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  131. TheOriginalDonaldApril 27, 2015 at 5:04 AM

    No, it was so Peg doesn't find out about Al's secret second marriage to Sofia Vergara

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  132. The cage match highlights the stupidity of an "extreme rules" show. Next month, Rollins and Orton will probably have a regular singles match, despite having what would have been a feud-ending stipulation match already.


    Yesterday I said I dislike Reigns, but actually, I'd take him over Orton all day. How do you only have a **1/2 match with Rollins?

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  133. The money spot for Roman Reigns would be him body slamming Show right in the middle of the ring. I'm not sure how they've missed doing that spot.

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  134. also Goldust / Piper

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  135. Unfortunately, early in his career, he was still trying to go up against WCW, so Vince was actually worried about ratings and what fans wanted. I think Vince probably thought of that as an unfortunate evil.

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  136. Modern Family dropped the ball on that. His first wife really should have been Katey Sagal.

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  137. Wow so sitting at home last night watching Daredevil and Game of Thrones with my wife I totally forgot this was even happening. Had not planned to watch it live anyway but didn't even think about it.

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  138. 'Hi, My name is Doctor Workrate, I believe you were enquiring about the current condition of Ortons enthusiasm, I won't lie to you things don't look good. It has deteriorated in recent days and we currently have it on life support and are monitoring it very closely. I would, however, suggest that you prepare yourself for the worst as we don't expect it to see the end of the week. I am sorry the news is not better at this time'.

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  139. I'm ok with it to. For the reasons that you mentioned, PLUS it seems like they want Cesaro and Kidd to be faces now?


    Cesaro and Kidd should really give themselves a tag team name.

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  140. Belee_Matt!_INDEED!!!April 27, 2015 at 5:39 AM

    I'm sorry. Aren't you the guy who criticizes movies all the time? Except Scott gets paid to watch shitty stuff.

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  141. They're saving that for Wrestlemania in Dallas, in front of 264 000 people. That is, if Big Show agrees to it.

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  142. Belee_Matt!_INDEED!!!April 27, 2015 at 5:45 AM

    Thanks for coming by every day to help give him money! :-)

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  143. Cesaro and Kidd stomping in tune with "New Day Sucks" was absolute gold. Those are the little details that they rarely bother with anymore.

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  144. Once again, Cesaro shows his inhuman level of strength. I can't believe you didn't even mention in the report the spot where he caught Big E in midair like he weighed nothing.

    The scary thing about him is that he doesn't even look all that 'big' in terms of muscle. Sure, he's obviously built, but he's not the extreme size of someone like - say - Ryback, who I'm fairly sure couldn't have manhandled someone the size of Big E quite so effortlessly.

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  145. I was hoping that Orton would just go off and feud with Kane for a bit (hopefully in fairly short matches) and leave Rollins with a more interesting opponent.


    That said, it could be interesting to have Rollins and Orton feud over the RKO, especially if Rollins got to win the 'right' to use the move and Orton was banned from it, and they stuck to that. It fits Seth well, and he can still pull out the Curb Stomp as his Burning Hammer, sorta thing, when necessary.

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  146. He's due to be feuding with Wyatt, apparently.

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  147. Yeah, I was 100% expecting the occasional cut-away to them fighting in notable Chicago landmarks. The crowd would have eaten it up, imo.

    Was quite disappointing when they just came back to the arena with no indication of what happened between them leaving and returning.

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  148. Definitely this. Have Ambrose wearing a Cubs jersey and carrying a baseball bat (gimmick infringement on Sting? Too soon?) - something a bit fun to play on the crowd a bit.

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  149. Agreed - I really liked that little touch. Naturally, the commentary booth completely missed it - or just chose to ignore it.


    I hated Kidd when he was with DHS - I thought they were boring as hell - but nowadays he's one of the most entertaining guys on the roster by miles. He and Cesaro are a great fit for one another - two guys who are absolute technicians, but also have that great power guy + agile guy dynamic that allows them to really innovate and mix things up.

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  150. The chase is better than the catch, a lot of the time, especially for face teams. If they actually put some faith and momentum with Cesaro + Kidd and give them a decent feud and run to get "their" titles back, it could be make for good watching.


    Plus, the US and IC titles are both held by faces, and Nikki (for some weird reason) also seems to be a face now (??) so you don't want the titles to be too saturated by faces...

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  151. So make the stip that *any* outside interference, no matter who from, is an immediate forfeit in Orton's favour.

    He's not really that smart, is he? ;)

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  152. High King Finn Balor, anyone?


    :D

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  153. He also feels like the only person this year to not have kicked out of at least one AA.

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  154. I don't think I've ever seen anyone pick up the announce table like Reigns did, which was a great visual, although I thought Show should've been able to get out of that before Reigns stood on the table to add more pressure.

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  155. ROCK-em SOCK-em Robot!!!!April 27, 2015 at 6:16 AM

    Xavier Woods is so awesome now.

    "New Day sucks!! Booooo!"

    "Why?!? What did we do?!?"

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  156. I'm sure Show himself did that to someone last year. I might be senile, though.

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  157. There was a missed opportunity to make it the longest WWE match of all time, and since they weren't in the ring there was in no danger of being a finish until they got back in.

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  158. Was Woods this funny in TNA? He really added to the match last night.

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  159. The show wasn't bad, it was just boring. Thumbs in the middle

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  160. I find it constantly amusing that, in the USA, it seems "ass" is considered a worse word than "arse" yet in the UK it's the exact opposite.

    Always makes me think back to the Simpsons episode where they visit London and Homer mentions "going for dinner with the Wankers."

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  161. I must have missed Paige being gone? Did she get hurt or something?

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  162. She was "injured" by Naomi after their recent match so she can go be a sexy Santa's wife in a movie.

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  163. ROCK-em SOCK-em Robot!!!!April 27, 2015 at 6:23 AM

    Three straight PPVs with the best match.

    The Reigns Train is picking up steam!!!

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  164. I cannot fathom why Kane is involved in any way with a main event feud in 2015. He has absolutely no value or drawing ability in his current role. It's death to the World Title scene.

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  165. I noticed that too and really liked it. I also liked when Ambrose and Harper came back and he shouted, "He's still getting beat up! He's still getting beat up!"

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  166. Can't deny he's been having good matches. If only they stopped giving him promo time.

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  167. OK now put Reigns with a decent wrestler and help him improve.

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  168. Noticeable that Rollins didn't use the new DDT thing last night.

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  169. The finish to the Orton-Reigns match really annoys me. They wanted to come up with a reason to stretch the feud out to Payback, but didn't want to put the belt on Orton, so they come up with something completely illogical to write themselves out of the corner they wrote themselves into. The RKO was banned AND Rollins has never used it or stolen an opponent's finisher before.


    It made zero sense from a character or story line standpoint to do that. Why not just put over Rollins and move him on to Reigns next month or something? If you can't find a way to do Orton-Rollins II in a way that makes sense, then DON'T DO IT.

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  170. You know what would help Reigns get over? If he answered Cena's open challenge and beat the tar out of him. Three PPV matches culminating at Summerslam and I think he stays over as a face.

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  171. If the Curb Stomp is banned, they could have had HHH "train" Rollins in the art of the Pedigree and given him that as a finisher, or have him feud with Orton over the right to use the RKO - and have Rollins eventually win and take the move as his own, then have Orton resort to the Pedigree and have HHH pissed-off and throw folk at him to try and stop him using it.

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  172. Hopefully they've realised it looks like shit.

    But I think it's more likely that they wanted to play more on the opportunistic nature of Rollins - which is fine if you keep that consistent.

    I said in another comment, if he needs a new finisher, and he's HHH's golden boy, the other option could be to have HHH "pass the torch" of the Pedigree to him, sort of like how Flair 'gave' Miz the figure four (but without it being totally fucked up this time).

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  173. Bizarre that Orton used the Pedigree last night. What was that about?

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  174. They explained it on commentary as him doing it to "send a message" to the Authority for banning the RKO.


    Which was stupid on so many levels - the main one being that both he and Seth got to pick a stipulation, and it didn't really have an awful lot to do with HHH whatsoever. So that made zero sense.

    Was a cool visual, right enough, and the crowd reacted well to it.

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  175. So if Rusev can just decide that he gets another match, the kind of match it will be, and when it will happen, what the holy fuck do we need The Authority for? Apparently people can just book their own shit.

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  176. the better way to get out of that step is to pull the Luger/Steamboat 89 finish where Rollins BEGS Orton to hit the RKO and he just can't help himself.

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  177. They did something similar with the Christian feud where the hothead Orton got himself DQed, with the stipulation that the title could change hands on a DQ.

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  178. A bit like when Christian pushed him into losing his temper and getting himself DQ'd - I always liked the psychology behind that, and I wish they'd done more with it at the time, as it was fun.

    IIRC, Christian spat in his face or something?

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  179. Great minds, brother! ;)

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  180. yeah ... and Rollins's character is a coward who hides behind HHH, Steph, Show, Kane, and J & J so getting Orton to DQ himself is completely within the confines of his kayfabe character. That said ... I also liked him using the RKO on Orton, too. It's just the rest of the match sucked.

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  181. I was genuinely expecting there to be a "you scratch my back" element to that. Would have made more sense.


    If they wanted to go in that direction, I'd have booked it thusly:

    It's the main event. Kane has just gone into the cage and taken out J&J Security after they and Rollins have managed to beat Orton down and hit Seth's finisher (whichever they choose for it to be at this point). He's choosing between Rollins and Orton for the recipient of his chokeslam, and chooses Rollins. Slams the shit out of him then simply walks out and leaves ringside, walking to the back.

    Orton comes to first, crawls his way to the door, only for Rusev to run in from the crowd and slam the door on his face, pull him into the ring and apply the Accolade while, as Orton is in the midst of passing out from the move, J&J help Rollins to the door, and freedom.


    Would have made much more logical sense for the whole Lana going into the Authority's office thing for her to have cut some sort of deal with them.

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  182. I've said on a couple of comments now, if they have to keep Rollins and Orton feuding for a bit longer, I'd enjoy it more if they were doing a "double or quits" aspect to it.

    Winner gets the belt AND the right to use the RKO.


    Would add a new level of intrigue to things, as Rollins could start hitting RKOouttanowhere on his opponents (other than Orton) in the build up to their rubber match, and so it becomes his de facto finisher.


    Then I'd have Rollins win, gain the RKO (and reserve the Curb Stomp to be his Burning Hammer-style super finisher, used on rare occasions) and have Orton's character freshened up with a new finisher and maybe even some new music. Have him decide to use the Pedigree as he's pissed the Authority allowed for the RKO to be stolen from him, then you have HHH pick someone - let's say Rusev (who has obviously come away from his feud with Cena after losing the I Quit match) act as his new Authority Avatar to take out Orton and have a feud between the two of them, which would do a lot - imo - to build Rusev back up after having been fed to the Cena USA Machine.

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  183. Very true. And a bitterness-inspired heel turn for him could maybe do him some good, too.

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  184. i wonder what Lana had to do for HHH (or Steph!) to earn the rematch next month...

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  185. I don't think he's staying over until he learns how to talk. Once again his pre match promo last night was uninspired and he looked uncomfortable trying to pronounce each word properly. The crowd saw right through it and were groaning halfway through... I don't get how Rollins went from shitty promo to one of the best promos in the company in a few weeks, and Reigns is stuck on 0

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  186. If it had been one or two heelish tactics, sure, but when you need the help of three men and several stipulations, it just makes Rollins look weak. And the guy that took the fight to Brock and "cleanly" got the pun in the WM main-event shouldn't be ping-ponging between being weak and strong.

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  187. Agreed this was the definition of a thumbs in the middle show

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  188. Just make him a silent arse-kicker.

    Or give him a manager/valet to do his talking for him.

    Problem solved. :)

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  189. Not sure if Reigns can do that, or at least, make it look impressive. Cesaro had to get Show over his head in order to get the proper leverage.

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