Sunday, January 11, 2015

The SmarK Rant for WCW Monday Nitro–02.12.96

The SmarK Rant for WCW Monday Nitro – 02.12.96

Live from Tampa, FL, although this was a TNA-style free show giveaway where George Steinbrenner basically rented the Nitro show and gave away 6000 tickets to people at the state fair.

Your hosts are Eric Bischoff, Bobby Heenan & Mongo

So Superbrawl VI was the night before this show, with Ric Flair regaining the World title from Randy Savage, Elizabeth turning heel, and Hogan winning a shitty cage match over the Giant. Oh, and weird shit went down between Brian Pillman and Kevin Sullivan.

Randy Savage v. Hugh Morrus

Savage is so serious here that he no-sells his own pyro, eschewing his usual wardrobe in favor of a simple t-shirt. So you know he means business. Morrus attacks and Savage gets busy selling before coming back with a choke. Morrus, the man training the last couple of generations of WWE Superstars, keeps firing away with his array of punches and choking, and a suplex gets two. Savage elbows him down, but Morrus goes up, misses the moonsault, and the flying elbow puts us out of our misery at 4:44. Shitty, shitty match. ½*

Loch Ness v. Scotty Riggs

Poor Scotty. Loch Ness, one of the most historically terrible wrestlers ever, gives him a shitty splash that nearly breaks the poor guy’s ribs, and a pair of elbows finishes at 1:00. Ones guess who wanted this slug brought in.

Ric Flair gets wheeled out by Liz and Woman on a gurney, after a wild night of partying. Flair is just amazing here, and Elizabeth actually gets promo time, and her character is the EVIL EX-WIFE who wants revenge on Savage. See, that’s called a MOTIVATION. Just in case any WWE writers are reading this.

Devon Storm v. Konnan

Storm is of course the future Crowbar, which is one of the weird reinventions on record. Konnan’s pre-match graphic makes him look like Rico Suave or something. Storm quickly grabs a chair and uses it for a dive, but tries a rana off the stairs and gets gently powerbombed onto the floor. Not that I’d want someone to get splatted onto the concrete, but why set up a stupidly dangerous spot like that and then do such a wussy payoff? Back in, Konnan gets his own rana before doing lucha libre spots that are totally unlike the worker he soon became. A one-handed slam gets two and Konnan wraps him up with a leglock as they note how impressive Konnan’s victory over the Gang was. Did that match even happen? I think it was just a made up title change, actually. Storm randomly comes back with a springboard elbow while Bischoff is forced to backtrack on his accusations of the WWF causing a blackout last week. That had to KILL him, I bet. Storm with another sloppy dive, but they go up and Konnan powerbombs him off for the pin at 5:30. Total style clash, like this was DEATH watching it today. * Konnan was just insufferable at this point, as the politics involved were so transparent and everyone knew it. On the other hand, it gave us the luchadors, so I guess the tradeoff was worth it.

Hulk Hogan v. Arn Anderson

Hulk slugs away in the corner and puts Arn down with clotheslines, and they brawl outside so that Hulk can beat him up some more. Back in, Hulk chokes him out with wrist tape while a disgusted Heenan goes on an epic rant against him. Atomic drop into a backdrop suplex and Hulk keeps slugging away in the corner, but Arn comes back with an elbow out of the corner. Arn stupidly goes up and Hulk slams him off, but Arn goes to the injured eye to take over. This brings out Flair and EVIL LIZ, who might be at her hotness peak here. Maybe nWo era was hotter, I’m not sure. Arn with the spinebuster for two, but it’s Hulk Up time. Big boot, but Hulk stops to showboat and puts Arn into a figure-four instead of finishing him. Flair comes in and gets beat up by Hogan, but Woman throws powder in his face and Liz gives Arn her shoe, and the SIZE SEVEN OF DOOM finishes for Arn at 9:15. So yes, AA is one of the few people to get a pinfall victory on Hulk Hogan. Hulk immediately pops up and destroys the Horsemen just so you know it means nothing, totally no-selling the powder and injury. This was basically Hulk squashing Arn like a bug before slipping on a banana peel. *1/2

The Pulse

Not my favorite episode of the show.

163 comments:

  1. Hugh Morrus being the WWE head trainer makes about as much sense as Buddy Lee Parker being the head trainer at the zzz power plant.

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  2. It's like, he was not a great worker, and if he had some great track record of pumping out quality talent or working miracles I could understand it, but we just keep hearing horror stories about his teaching methods and keep getting the same cookie-cutter goofs coming out of developmental. How does he keep his job?!

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  3. How many times are we gonna relive 1996 on this blog?

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  4. Because Vince finds him...humorous?

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  5. It's why I stick to the 80's, the decade of Bayless

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  6. Come on, now. This is no laughing matter.

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  7. OH I GET IT! The K in SmarK is capitalized because his name is Scott Keith! I get it now! It's like G.R.O.S.S.

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  8. SUFFERING SUCCOTASH, YOU MAY BE RIGHT!

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  9. "Savage is so serious here that he no-sells his own pyro, eschewing his
    usual wardrobe in favor of a simple t-shirt. So you know he means
    business."

    Wait, what?! A top babyface lost a PPV World Title match and he didn't come out the next night joking around and laughing it off? I'm confused.

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  10. Simple, WWE WANTS the cookie cutter goofs.


    Every worker today has handcuffs on and it's clear as day that it goes beyond simply banning a few overly dangerous moves and or chairshots/blading.


    Even Daniel Bryan was working the same damn match with the same half a dozen spots over and over as of last year.

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  11. Theberzerker Von HUSSingtonJanuary 11, 2015 at 11:49 PM

    Sister Abigail, pin. Wocka wocka!

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  12. Theberzerker Von HUSSingtonJanuary 11, 2015 at 11:51 PM

    The more things that happened beyond Vince's control, guys leaving, guys dying, guys with outside projects, the tighter and tighter his grip became.

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  13. The Main Event - 2/4/96:
    Mexican Heavyweight Champion Konnan pinned WCW US Champion the One Man Gang to win the title at 3:59 by holding onto the top rope as the champion attempted a slam into the ring, with Konnan falling on top for the win; prior to the bout, it was announced the two would have a title match at SuperBrawl VI; after the contest, OMG attacked Konnan and stomped him out of the ring



    From historyofwwe.com

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  14. Yeah, why not use someone like Lance Storm or something? I have a feeling Morris is there cause he probably kisses a lot of ass and is a total yes man, and if he ever does try to speak up, they just meet him with a "but dude, you were Hugh Morris".

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  15. Just as long as he doesn't get a Hugh G. Rection.

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  16. Buddy Lee Parker blowing the spot where his own name was called in the lottery at Starrcade 91, with the entire heel locker room watching him in disbelief as he does it, is sad

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  17. Storm would be too smart to take that job I'd think. I always wondered why they hadn't hired X-Pac as a trainer. I remember hearing about how they'd always have a new guy wrestke Pac in their first match and use him as a barometer for a guy being good or not. Jericho had to work with him a fair bit when he first came over to teach him the "WWE style".

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  18. Slight TJ: "The next edition of "WWE Countdown" airs on the WWE Network on Tuesday
    and will look at the ten "most infamous Intercontinental Champions of
    all-time." The list features options that were made available on an
    official WWE website poll that was put up back in July of 2014."


    Finally, an episode of Countdown devoted exclusively to The Mountie.

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  19. I loved the brawl after the main event that felt it was going to set up an amazing Hogan & Savage vs Anderson & Flair match at the next PPV.

    Instead we got the worst main event ever with the tower of doom 8 vs 2 match that finally killed any goodwill the crowd still had with Hogan.

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  20. The Konnan thing is so weird for me now. I was a workrate fanatic back then... yet I thought Konnan was AWESOME. I mean, just totally one of my favourite WCW guys. Looking back, I think I was just roped in by his charisma- the guy was the drizzling shits in the ring, but had "it"- even other wrestlers admit it. If he was a great worker, he could have been a huge star.

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  21. Storm likes living in Canada, and wouldn't move. I think Morrus is the guy the clueless management thinks is a great trainer. HIs method of torturing his students is also probably well-liked, given how the company treats its own employees.

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  22. A lot of mediocre, nothing wrestlers have gone on to be great trainers- a trainer's really just there to teach a guy the spots and the physical side of the game, and it's up to the wrestler to build from that foundation.

    Of course, Morrus ISN'T a great trainer, because all the trainees have been middling shit. So he just sucks.

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  23. Shawn's supporters lost their smiles.

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  24. Not gonna lie. I voted for The Mountie again.

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  25. As a UK-based blog otter in his mid-thirties, I live in awe of Giant Haystacks (Loch Ness). His running fued with Big Daddy was the highlight of my Saturdays in the mid-80's. I was TERRIFIED of the guy! At the time, that fued was second only to Megatron vs Optimus Prime

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  26. Mr Perfect vs William Regal. That match would have been magical to watch.

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  27. I thought maybe they might have fought on some random Nitro but it doesn't look like it. A google search found Hennig having matches with a different Steve Regal in the 80s.

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  28. That's fucking hilarious.

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  29. I think I should be making $500k per year while getting blown by a different hot bitch twice a day.

    That don't make it reality fire either of our thoughts.

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  30. Where did the Quebecers get to in the tag team tournament? Because we may have to redo that.

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  31. Flair has more talent in one saggy boob than Mountie does in his whole cattle prod.

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  32. We're in that weird Immortal Hulkster phase of the show that really is insufferable. Once he dips out things get a lot better with Savage/Flair and Sting/Luger/Giant taking over the show.

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  33. I get in that respect, we should be glad it happened?

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  34. There is no correlation between being a great wrestler/player and being a great trainer/coach. In fact, the precise opposite is more likely true.

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  35. Wait, I thought the trendy talking point was that NXT was full of great talent and way better than the main roster? Which is it? (And Generico has gotten exponentially better since becoming Sami Zayn, so it can't all be chalked up to just getting great indy talent.)

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  36. Also, WWE wants a hard ass guy like him who will weed out the wannabes who show up for developmental try-outs.

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  37. That promo was after Patera was Intercontinental Champion. Plus that was after his peak as a wrestler.

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  38. I remember Loch Ness. I was watching Superbrawl that year with my brother and some friends, and we see this REALLY FUCKING FAT GUY come out and try to kill Hogan. Which we thought was awesome, because we all hated Hogan.


    Maybe we get spared the Doomsday Cage if Loch Ness doesn't get diagnosed with cancer.

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  39. I'm a flip flopper

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  40. As would a turtle

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  41. Because 96 was the best year in American wrestling history?

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  42. I remember a story that Batista went to the Power Plant, and Sarge's brilliant strategy was "Let's try and run off this muscle poser who thinks he's so tough". Batista thought they were all a bunch of cunts and left, went to WWE, made millions.

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  43. But wait, hang on. You can't have winners in a Jobber tournament.

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  44. It'll have to be losers advance rules, I'd say.

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  45. But...does that mean The Mountie would be out in the first round?!

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  46. That's not gonna be much fun is it? :(

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  47. Big Daddy v Hogan should have main evented WM6.

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  48. That popup right at after 3 reminds me of when he kicked out at 3.00001 vs Warrior at WM VI, completely no selling the splash that kept him down. I was 6 and actually thought he might have kicked out, which knowing Hogan was part of the plan.

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  49. Loch Ness is a really bad wrestler name. Loch Ness is a place. It's a lake. Did he form a stable with other terrifying wrestlers CENTRAL PARK, NIAGRA FALLS and BLACKPOOL SEAFRONT

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  50. I hate it when guys do that. I'm surprised more victors aren't noticeably pissed off when it happens.

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  51. He's the Lunatic Fringe of Loch Ness?

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  52. I remember watching him when he was in AAA and CMLL. The dude's popularity rivaled Hulk Hogan

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  53. Actually I'd have liked to have seen the reaction from Shawn if Bret had immediately popped his shoulder up on 3 at Wrestlemania 12.

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  54. "This was basically Hulk squashing Arn like a bug before slipping on a banana peel."

    Oh God. Let's not give Vince anymore ideas on how to job Dean Ambrose.

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  55. Actually Shawn came by later to Bret's hotel room and thanked him for staying down for the full 3 count and with a tear in his eye told Bret that he was the greatest man he ever pinned.

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  56. That might be too tall a tale even for Bret.

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  57. This. It's true for just about anything. The old idiom "Those who can't do, teach" has a lot of truth to it. I have no idea if the dude is a good trainer or not, but his own in-ring ability wouldn't be near the top of the list of reasons as to why not.

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  58. The finals would be The Quebecers vs The Rogeaus.


    At which point, the blog explodes because we can't choose.

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  59. Yeah, but he wasn't in the ring with too many people who could keep pace with a more advanced style. He had a great match with Bray, but Bray was (is, I guess) still pretty green and not exactly versatile yet. Orton, Batista, Kane, all good workers to varying degrees within their own styles, but again, not people who can work the kind of match he's capable of.


    We haven't seen him in a singles match of note (there might've been a throwaway here or there on Raw) with an indie graduate like Rollins or Cesaro since his series with Punk, I'd say. His match with Triple H was probably by far the closest thing to that type of match (and was also the best WWE singles match of the year, at least on the main roster, not coincidentally) because Triple H is by far the closest thing he's faced to that type of worker.

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  60. Better than The Wall.

    The Wall is a wall.

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  61. I always knew this
    blog would come to an end due to some Mountie related paradox.

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  62. Almost entirely off-topic, but this reminds me of a Rolling Stone article about Bill Murray a few months ago. He will, on set, throw banana peels at the feet of random people. Not to see them slip and fall. But just to see their reactions: "Did you just throw a banana peel at my feet?"
    Bill Murray is the greatest.

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  63. A wall in Berlyn

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  64. 1. He didn't ask why.
    2. No.

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  65. True. But cold-blooded.

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  66. At least the Mountie won a match once in a while - I think the Generals only beat the Globetrotters once (or maybe twice).

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  67. I remember seeing the title switch on t.v. I don't recall if it was that match specifically but I do recall them wrestling and Konnan going over for the belt.

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  68. Most people in the UK know him as Giant Haystacks so not his worst name.

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  69. Is that the recaps site ran by the guy who played THE MOUNTIE on Due South?

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  70. Upvote for Megatron vs Optimus Prime as THE feud of the time. Downvote for using 'blog otter'.

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  71. That I Quit match with Foley was manly though.

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  72. Find a better year than 1996, you can't.

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  73. And he slowly rose up like he'd actually accomplished something. And Abdullah then destroys him, slamming Buddy Lee's head into what was then described the viewers by Jim Ross as a "steel locker."

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  74. Flair was creaming his pants at the chance to do one last giant blade job.

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  75. They should've kept the Dark Hogan character that he became for Halloween Havoc. It was different at least.

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  76. This, actually, I bought. Warrior's splash wasn't really the 'finisher,' per se...it was more like the finishing touch after his REAL finisher, the gorilla press drop. (Sort of like how the Rock Bottom is the real finisher and the People's Elbow is just the icing on the cake.) After all, Warrior wasn't a big guy, so it's not like his big splash would really make sense as a finish at it would for, say, Akeem or Typhoon.

    The sequence was that Hogan was temporarily stunned from his missing his legdrop, leaving the Warrior an opportunity to hit the splash. It was a tactical win by Warrior rather than a dominant one, yet it still left him no less over for it; it's silly to think as something as simple as "just rolling out of the way of the legdrop" would be seen as a great strategy, yet that's how it worked.

    If they'd actually had the Hogan/Warrior rematch at WM7 or whenever, it wouldn't have surprised me if the finish there had been Warrior dropping Hogan with the gorilla press but then missing the splash, allowing Hogan to hit the legdrop for the win with Warrior just barely being kept down for the 3-count.

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  77. I defend that on the grounds that he was in the middle of his Hulk-up routine and it was the first time he ever missed the legdrop during it. If the power of Hulkamania is running through him, then the splash shouldn't be enough to put him out. It should just be enough to stun him a bit. I know that all sounds stupid. But it's hard to take the Hulk-up routine seriously as it is so any explanation on it will sound silly.

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  78. They lost to Rock and Foley...despite my best efforts

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  79. I YAM THE MOUNTIE!

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  80. Nwo and post nwo was Liz hottest peak. Had that milf thing going to a tee

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  81. 1997.
    That was easy.

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  82. That was a great show wasn't it? They should bring it back.

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  83. The first 10 entrants to the 1997 Royal Rumble disputes your comment.

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  84. For as terrible as Cena's character is (and it's pretty fucking awful), pre-Hollywood Hogan was even worse.


    I remember as a kid being totally into Loch Ness. They did that mini feud with The Giant and I was all in. My brain couldn't process such a battle of the giants.

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  85. Wow, I demand a recount. I don't mind them losing to a real team like the Steiners or Road Warriors, but losing to the Rock and Sock Connection just ruins any credibility these tournaments have.

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  86. I actually have never seen it. I think I'd just discovered getting drunk on cheap cider over the local park, when it was in its early evening slot here in the UK.

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  87. I think it's okay to use blog otter in a mocking tone.

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  88. Taste of his own medicine - I'm pretty sure Slaughter kicked out at 3.000001 at WMVII. He didn't kneel in the middle of the ring arguing with god though.

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  89. Pretty much. Preternatural greatness is instilled in the DNA of the best athletes and teaching someone how to do something is an entirely different skill set.

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  90. Most of the greatest athletes/musicians/artists can simply do things others can't; things that can't be taught. Someone like Peyton Manning would probably go crazy dealing with a QB who couldn't run an offense exactly how he'd want (and could).

    Larry Bird is an interesting example because I think many would say much of his success is more due to his work ethic than innate ability. So it makes sense he'd be a good coach because he became an all-time great without extraordinary athletic ability.

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  91. Oops. I'm new to posting after 13 years of lurking. I haven't had my induction. I always thought blog otter was quite endearing.

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  92. As somebody who loves the "reviving elbow" I have no choice but to accept this explanation.

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  93. Lost in the middle of all that, Ric Flair and double A cut a ***** post-match promo....one of my all time favorites.

    "Hogannnnnn! You got your ass kicked....again!"

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGOF65fkcgg&t=45m11s

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  94. Peyton Manning can't handle a scoreboard operator not running things the way he wants him to.

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  95. Wayne Gretzky sucked as a coach.

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  96. To be the man you have to get your man!

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  97. If it were under province of Quebec rules it's a different story!!

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  98. Triple H uses his knee offensively frequently and Rey Mysterio had surgery 5 times ON HIS LEFT KNEE!!!

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  99. You have to look at the camera and wink after saying blog otter

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  100. Oh, 10 entrants in one battle royal. Sure, that's an argument against an entire year of wrestling on a whole continent.

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  101. Bret was the tallest guy in his high school class!

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  102. I was watching this episode on the network and had no idea Double A got the win so I totally marked.

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  103. It's true that you don't have to run as fast as Usain Bolt to be able to train Usain Bolt, but if you couldn't run 100m in a believable way in a worked race (Bah God King, he just broke Justin Gaitlin in half with a steel relay baton) then it's probably not a good it idea to make that guy the head trainer of the Wacky Racing Federation.

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  104. The 97 Rumble had 23 participants from AAA. Thank you.

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  105. If Liz really wanted to piss Randy off she would have said that she really was Flair's before she was with Savage. That might have gotten them both killed though so good call on her part.

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  106. There are lots of track coaches who never ran at an elite level, just like anything else.

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  107. OK, the schtick is already old. Just be an actual person.

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  108. And the more star systems have slipped through his fingers. . . .

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  109. Arn walks to the ring with Woman next to him and does the "throat cutting" gesture, and I immediately get uncomfortable.

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  110. Yeah we don't like schtick around here #mountieisthebestwrestlerever

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  111. Flair, Bret, Hennig, Michaels...now that's a fucking tournament!

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  112. Bret v Mountie and Jannetty v Shawn IC title rematches.


    Now THAT'S a fucking tournament, brah!

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  113. That's not the point I'm making. You don't have to be a good athlete to be a good coach, but you do have to be a good coach.

    You can be a bad shoot fighter and still coach good shoot fighters. If you're a bad worked fighter it's unlikely you're good at putting together worked fights and you're probably not the best at coaching pro wrestlers.

    Anyway, I'm off to register the names WRF and Wacky Racing Federation then put together a Kickstarter proposal.

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  114. Not to mention voted "Most Jam Up Guy" by his graduating class.

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  115. I have that on a homemade DVD somewhere. Wasn't the switch from Sasuke to Gang a trick, like Kensuke didn't know it was for the title? I thought there was something about that here recently.

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  116. No, and certainly not if we're counting whole episodes of Raw, not just the good stuff people remember.

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  117. Maybe Loch Ness' life gets spared if he doesn't get diagnosed with cancer ...

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  118. The worst wrestling figure I ever owed. Those AWA figures were terrible anyways, but I only ended up with him because he was in a 3 pack with Jimmy Garvin and Precious. He lost every match in my house. Good times.

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  119. 1996 was a great year for Cinemax, that's for sure.

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  120. I respect you Bloggerman!

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  121. "Hey greaseball!"

    The Mountie at his finest:

    http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cj9BT3YPC8o

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  122. MaffewOfBotchamaniaJanuary 12, 2015 at 1:28 PM

    Konnan vs. Devon Storm must be bad...but it can't be Konnan vs. One Man Gang bad.

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  123. Watching Hogan take the spinebuster is a fond childhood memory, for some reason.

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  124. Should I have counted it based on things I don't remember?

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  125. Yup. I never liked Warrior using a big splash for a finish. I always bought the press as being the "real" finish, followed by the splash on the back.

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  126. Well played, sir.

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  127. Honestly, he kind of was a huge star during the Attitude Era. Dude got MASSIVE pops in the Wolfpac days, and his spiel was just as iconic and well known as Road Dogg's.

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  128. Well he was in a stable with a zodiac, a shark, and an avalanche

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  129. I like 92, and even I don't think it was as good as 96.

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  130. Some of the best wrestlers of all time were trained by mediocre in-ring hands like Larry Sharpe and Bruce Hart.

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  131. I don't know about all the trainees. Isn't Breeze a trainee? He's pretty darn good, IMO.

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  132. There are obvious reasons why they wouldn't want Waltman in charge of their young impressionable wrestlers. He could be useful as *a* trainer, perhaps, but not *the* trainer.

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  133. See, I'd argue his Orton matches (on Raw, NOT PPV) were among his best in WWE, and very non-formulaic. Watch their street fight from summer 13 (face-face) or their bout from last December for examples.

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  134. This is a fact. WWE believes in its formula, for better or worse. It makes the floor very high but can also make the ceiling low for matches. Some guys, when they "earn enough cred" can experiment with the formula and go outside the box (to mixed results, as seen in many Ambrose matches).

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  135. Mountie fans, vote early and vote often!

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  136. The Ghost of Faffner HallJanuary 12, 2015 at 3:03 PM

    So that's where the now got the idea to hijack the announcer's booth every other week.

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  137. That's an excellent point. His matches with Orton on Raw were awesome.

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  138. Voted for the Mountie and Greg Valentine - I like Hart, but Valentine really don't get nowhere near the respect he deserves from this generation. An amazing IC Champion, and was much important in that role then Hart. The Mountie of course is Handsome, Brave and Strong. So that one is a no brainer....

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  139. I think it's more....


    Ric Flair = The Man
    Mountie = Always gets his Man. Without question - ALWAYS.



    Winner - Mountie.

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  140. Yes. Havoc 97...smokin...

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  141. "Well ya know Eric, brother, I don't know if that's the way to go, man. I think the people will be red hot for me to come back in the red and yellow, brother. We could even bring back Bruti and repackage him as, get this brother, The BOOTY Man! He could shake his booty and that will be his deal. Maybe even put Page's old lady with him. The people would love it, dude. I think this next phase of Hulkamania will be stronger than the first, brother. We can take into the year 2000 and beyond, man. Let's do this!"

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  142. Tis true. I recall 6th grade me rocking the saggy pants and polo shirt buttoned only at the top. Envision the whitest kids you can imagine in South Carolina yelling "Odelay" and "Ariba la raza".

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  143. How did Johnny Ace? I have no idea on either count.

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  144. can someone explain pillmans random run in a month after superbrawl on nitro where even the wrestlers especially seemed confused what he was doing there? i know him and bischoff were pulling one over on everyone blah blah but that was just bizarre. I

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  145. I'm still amazed that Savage, the most paranoid wrestler ever, was okay with Flair kissing Liz on-air (even if it wasn't reciprocated.)

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  146. I think Shawn was angry enough that Bret popped up immediately after the first superkick.

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  147. In thinking about it, I'm surprised Savage signed off on the angle to begin with. Why even open those wounds?

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  148. Hogan at least sold the job for about 45 seconds. That's a record for him until he jobbed to Crocky.

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  149. I really wanted to see that with HBK. Hogan hulks up and does the punches - but Shawn ducks the big boot and hits the superkick. Even if hogan no sold and hulked up on it, I would have wished they had of done that spot.

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  150. The Wall was a boring generic wrestler until Hulk Hogan endorsed him on Nitro - two weeks before the reboot. "Hey look - that's the Wall, brother. Hey yo Wall, you want some come get some. That the Wall up there brother."

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  151. Somethings aren't worth it

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  152. Agreed, and if Bischoff said - do it or be fired - I'd take the debt and one year on my contract and go home and work at a gas station.

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