Have we all come down from the happening that is Wrestlemania?
YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!
Can we now get back to our regular lives?
YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!
See even I like to join in on the fun. Never would I think an orgasm could develop into a wrestling chant.
Enjoy the show and come out swinging but remember to keep it clean.
I can't believe coming off a good WM and a great Raw, they have the 3 fucking Stooges guest hosting. If they want to keep some of the audience they gained from WM, they need to stop doing this kind of stuff.
ReplyDeleteThree Stooges will be totally harmless if they're not the stars of the show. If they have one or two segments that are a few minutes, this should not be an issue.
ReplyDeleteCome on, cultstatus! Last week's Raw was one of the best ever. Ease up, bud.
So Will Sasso's gonna be on another wrestling show. I wonder if Bret Hart will make an appearance to job to him?
ReplyDeleteThe should have the Stooges open up, plug their shitty movie for a few minutes and piss off the crowd. Then have Brock come out and tell them to fuck off. Perfect way to get the crowd behind Brock.
ReplyDeleteI know last week's Raw was great, I just have no faith in this company to build off it.
Never would I think an orgasm could develop into a wrestling chant.
ReplyDeleteWell, both do involve a fair bit of kayfabe.
Uh, so I hear.
I read somewhere that they are guest "STARRING" not guest hosting.
ReplyDeleteProbably Zach Ryder and Daniel Bryan job to him in a three way.
ReplyDeleteWell now then that makes it all better.
ReplyDeleteI'll put up with the Stooges if their part on the show ends with Brock F-5ing them.
ReplyDeleteExtreme Rules? Talk about blowing your wad.
ReplyDeleteI don't mind seeing Brock align with Big Johnny, I would have rather they waited a few months though.
ReplyDeleteGODDAMMIT STOP SMILING, CENA.
ReplyDeleteLesnar/Cena at Extreme Rules? Why so early?
ReplyDeleteGreat. "Smiley" is here.
ReplyDeleteThis is just as dramatic as Austin/Tyson!
ReplyDeleteOr something...
HOLY CRAP, biznass just picked up, wow.
ReplyDeleteThis is the pull apart brawl everyone wanted to see for Rock & Cena. I like it better here.
ReplyDeleteLoved that slap from Cena. Wasn't expecting it all. No idea why the entire roster would care about breaking it up.
ReplyDeleteLooks like Lesnar got a couple of shots in on Cena. Bet those images are gonna be in the pre-match montage.
ReplyDeleteI never gotten why the other wrestlers would be invested in keeping two guys apart, but damn if it doesn't make an awesome visual.
ReplyDeleteI was with you until he got opened up. Cena smirking with a bloody mouth = infinitely more awesome than Cena's been for the past few years.
ReplyDeleteI thought that too.
ReplyDeleteAnyone else see the interesting correlation here? John Cena is the first in line for Brock Lesnar? The last time the top face in the company was first in line for Lesnar, he walked out.
ReplyDeleteThat was pretty awesome.
ReplyDeleteI'm still not sure what they're fighting about.
But that was pretty awesome.
Nice segment. They are still doing everything they can to make sure the crowd sees Lesnar as the heel.
ReplyDeleteI really have no problem with this opening. Smiling while busted open hardway is actually a little more endearing.
ReplyDeleteThat was a nice visual
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't go that far, but it was the best pull-apart since.
ReplyDeleteBLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!
ReplyDeleteAnd Cena is still smiling like a jackass.
I also like Goldust and Bill DeMott as run-out guys!
Hot opening (even if it was too reminiscent of Austin/Tyson)
that was fuckin awesome?? think blood was drawn from lesnar connecting? or did cena blade? or posss bite his toungue?
ReplyDeleteOK, that slap was actually pretty awesome.
ReplyDeleteWow, I haven't seen a shot that real since Y2J decked Shawn Michaels' wife.
ReplyDeleteExcept bitchslapping someone isn't a face move. Frankly I'm not sure where this is going, and I'm intrigued.
ReplyDeleteThat first punch from Brock after he tackled him was a potato, I think that's where the blood came from.
ReplyDeleteOh I was just joking, it seems nowhere near as intense/interesting.
ReplyDeleteI dunno, this whole angle does nothing for me, mostly because we know it's leading to a main event between two half-timers, all at the expense of CM Punk getting into the *real* main event.
I liked that he came out as the smiling cocky jock and when Cena slapped him he immediately turned into the insane unpredictable bad ass from the UFC days. Good job.
ReplyDeleteWell with that replay, it definitely does not look like a blade that's for sure...
ReplyDeleteok so that replay confirmed lesnar connected.
ReplyDeleteOver/Under on how many replays we'll see of that tonight...I'll set it at 10. And I have a feeling I'm on the low side.
ReplyDeleteAt least they aren't saving Cena-Brock for Mania, I guess. Figured Summerslam would make more sense, but eh.
I like that Johnny keeps the Pritchard suit handy in his office. Just in case.
ReplyDeleteWow, so I thought Cena was over with my kids.
ReplyDeleteFunk/Santino is turns my living room into Candian Stampede.
It was retaliation to Lesnar's attack last week but you make a good point.
ReplyDelete$$$$$$$$$$
ReplyDeleteWhy else? Strike when the iron is hot.
Tonight? How about over-under until the PPV?
ReplyDeleteI'll set it at 304.
And say over.
Man, Vickie could get it tonight.
ReplyDeleteHe should NEVER stop smiling. That's why he's a heel to you & a face to the kids.
ReplyDeleteIf Brock Lesnar punches you in the face & you smile = you're a badass.
The best way to keep the smarks happy: Com breaks during Dolph Ziggler matches. Gotta love them.
ReplyDeleteWhy so early? Because the writing team can't cope with a storyline that takes more than 4 weeks...EVER.
ReplyDeleteI'm beginning to think John Cena is the Joker.
ReplyDeleteHow do we not have a name yet for Swagger and Ziggler?
ReplyDeleteIf' he's still the All American American then why is he wearing a Tennesee Titan uniform and not something a little more...American?
ReplyDeleteAnyone else feel like they're positioning Punk to drop the belt to Brock, and not transition it to a "bigger name" first as Scott suggested? Johnny set up the "Knightfall" angle last week, made the ominous natural disaster threat, is apparently aligned with Brock, and they're blowing their wad on Cena-Brock already. I'm never happy to see Punk job, but feeding Cena to Brock first to "build him up" for Punk has to be seen as small victory. If Punk runs a gauntlet first, goes into the match the proverbial "walking wounded", hangs with Brock and actually gets the crowd to think he's got a shot before succumbing, there's no shame in that.
ReplyDeleteNo I agree with you in that it seemed like they wanted to make him a heel (although to be fair, I guess Brock could've been setting him up too) but if he had jacked him in the jaw or something, it would've made a whole lot more sense than a bitchslap....but maybe these are Cena mindgames?
ReplyDeleteIt used to seem like a minor complaint, but seriously, why is John Cena always smirking? Is there some sort of clever booking going on here where they're making him a heel without making him a heel, like the smirking and the over the top, had to be phony speech about The Rock last week?
ReplyDeleteEither way, I know it's worked, but I'd still enjoy Brock Lesnar fake being the shit out of John Cena.
HA! Lawler actually went off script and silenced Coleslaw there. Vince might be out campaigning with Linda or something tonight.
ReplyDeleteLike maybe a Dallas Cowboys colour cordination tonight? Easy heel heat in DC, too.
ReplyDeleteJobbing Ziggler to the Funkasaurus is a waste. He deserves much better than this crap
ReplyDeleteI know I'm not saying anything new, but Dolph Ziggler is fantastic. He sells his ass off for his opponents' offense.
ReplyDeleteThe one thing the Funkasaurus proves is that at the end of the day, we're all a bunch of fucking marks.
ReplyDeleteIf only JR had figured out that by showing no charisma whatsoever he would've been pushed, rather than humiliated.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I'm starting to get the feeling that upper midcarder with the occasional title shot on a filler pay per view is about all they have in mind for him. There doesn't seem to be any reason why he's not in the main event now if they were going to put him there.
ReplyDeleteWorse yet, it sounds like Cena thinks so, too.
ReplyDeleteIt's a SHRINE! It's got the little plaque and everything. I love it.
ReplyDeleteExtreme Rules....another PPV where the main event involves no titles.
ReplyDeletePoor Punk.
Between their Wrestlemania cameo and their backstage appearance there with Santino, I think Tyler Reks and Curt Hawkins are gonna feel pretty ridiculous when they get fired in a week or two.
ReplyDeleteThe dried blood on his face during his bit in the back with Johnny Ace was also money.
ReplyDeleteAlright, first replay less than 20 minutes late. Where's Witlon?
ReplyDeleteTheir "future endeavors" don't look so bright.
ReplyDeleteKane should have slowly pointed down the hallway when Santino was looking for the Stooges.
ReplyDeleteI've always just loved "Swaggler". It's a terrible name but I just love saying it
ReplyDeleteYou don't think it would be hot for say Summerslam? Considering the fact he's doing 2 Raws a month. I just don't see the need to waste this match on a B-PPV.
ReplyDeleteThat was the second, they replayed it after the first break, too. I'm counting, worry not.
ReplyDeleteMy son just asked me why the Stooges are in color.
ReplyDelete(He's watched the old ones on DVD because I'm a Larry Fine mark)
So yeah, even six-year-olds think that movie is going to be shit.
Yay, 2 weeks in a row where the fucking Big Show distracts Cody and Rhodes is stupid enough to stand in the ring watching. Creativity at its finest.
ReplyDeleteCody Rhodes tights are terrible. And what did he do to end up on such a jobtastic streak?
ReplyDeleteBret did say on twitter that one of his best WCW matches was against Sasso!
ReplyDeleteBig Show is getting pretty postmodern with this feud.
ReplyDeleteShow interrupts Cody to show him a video...of him showing him a video.
ReplyDeleteI don't even care, I love this.
Are they trying to portray the Big Show as a savior of African-Americans from big bad Cody Rhodes or something? First he saves Kofi now R-Truth.
ReplyDeleteAwesome can't wait to see the six-man tag match that they're involved in! I would've figured that Swaggler and, I don't know, Vickie would be involved in a six-person mixed-tag or something, just because hey, someone has to job to the Stooges.
ReplyDeleteOh that's cringe inducing...
ReplyDeleteI would not trust the WWE to keep it hot til June, much less SummerSlam.
ReplyDeleteYou can never waste Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena. Just count the money. This angle was going to be too hot to stretch out.
I know lots of smarts will bitch about it but sometimes (and the entire Attitude era is proof of this) hotshotting an angle is a GOOD idea.
Is this WWE Inception? We just saw a vid clip within a vid clip.
ReplyDeleteI have to say, the 3 stooges are pulling off the mannerisms really well (although I did notice that Moe had his wedding ring on).
It may have been more about giving Clay a win over somebody with a name than making Ziggler look foolish.
ReplyDeleteMy GOD was that 3 Stooges segment beyond awful.
ReplyDeleteThis has all the makings of a terrible SNL recurring bit that wont ever go away.
ReplyDeletePainful. So fucking painful.
ReplyDeleteAt least they only exposed Santino to the awful.
This is what they show coming off their biggest audience in more than year.
ReplyDeleteAwful. So, so fucking awful.
ReplyDeleteI wish this was 1998 so Stone Cold would come out & stunner the Stooges like 100 times.
ReplyDeleteLoved it...loved it all.
ReplyDeleteSlapstick is so time and place intensive...and these days is not the time or place.
ReplyDeleteFucking dreaful.
Go YouTube the originals.
Swaggin' and Zaggin'. The evolutionary Thuggin' and Buggin'.
ReplyDeleteYou may be the only one :)
ReplyDeleteWasn't the new Stooges movie supposed to have Jim Carrey and Ben Stiller or some shit like that? How'd they end up with Will Sasso and Jack from Will & Grace.
ReplyDeleteRhodes' tights look legit like underwear. I mean they're always underwearish but those look like right from the Fruit of the Loom package.
ReplyDeleteThe guy that played Larry was an embarrassment to the character.
ReplyDeleteMy buddy's trying to get me to go to Exteme Rules. So far the card looks like:
ReplyDeleteCena-Brock
Punk-Y2J
Orton-Kane
Rhodes-Big Show
Bryan-Sheamus
Something involving Clay, Santino, Ziggler, & Swagger
The price for a decent seat is about $100. Plus, there's a Ring of Honor/Chikara double event that same weekend. Right now I think I'm leaning toward the indy wrestling- price is a big factor, ROH/Chikara is only about $45 total.
During the pull-apart I noticed Yoshi Tatsu and I realized that he was still part of the roster. That wont be lasting much longer.
ReplyDeleteHehehehe. Someone make a Tumblr pick of Yoshi's face there: "Bitch, you ain't no Japanese."
ReplyDeleteI'm such a Larry Fine mark it's gross, that guy, whoever the fuck he is, deserves a broken glass milkshake.
ReplyDeleteI'm such a Larry Fine mark it's gross, that guy, whoever the fuck he is, deserves a broken glass milkshake.
ReplyDeleteThose WM rematches should be pretty good minus the Big Slow of course. Not a bad card.
ReplyDeleteIIRC, Carrey & Stiller had originally signed on but dropped out after they saw how bad the script was.
ReplyDeleteBecause Stiller and Carrey knew how terrible it would be.
ReplyDeleteOr possibly "Fuck you Gaijin."
ReplyDelete"Albert" chant. Heh. This gimmick is already a FAIL.
ReplyDeleteYoshi Tatsu wont survive the next round of cuts
ReplyDeleteWait what...which one is Jack from Will and Grace? I couldn't even tell I was too busy trying not to break shit in my living room.
ReplyDeleteThree Stooges are the number one trend on Twitter. Looks like Vince got what he wanted out of that...
ReplyDeleteHis job matches need to be shorter so the crowd doesn't get the chance to shit all over him.
ReplyDeleteLarry. Will Sasso's not a bad choice for Curly, look wise. I dunno who this guy is playing Moe but he looks like when Colin Farrell got all uglified for Horrible Bosses.
ReplyDeleteTensai used to be A-Train and dominated the Japanese...I'm surprised Vince didn't decide to bring him back as A-Bomb
ReplyDeleteA Train is gonna fucking kill someone. Literally. And all to the sound of crickets.
ReplyDeleteBelieve it or not, Sean Penn was reportedly going to be involved, too. The movie got delayed, then they all dropped out and we got stuck with this mess.
ReplyDeleteJesus fucking Christ....they have THAT GUY playing Larry Fine?
ReplyDeleteEww.
Yeah, plus it sounds idiotic to have Cole play him up as a "former WWE superstar who became a star in Japan" and not mention is name while he was in the WWE
ReplyDeleteThe pull apart was good but the rest of the show at this point has been forgettable.
ReplyDeletePerfectly OK with me. Sometimes I can turn off my cynicism and just enjoy how hilarious and/or absurd stuff gets.
ReplyDeleteIt's not a good idea to debut every big guy with a month's worth of job matches. A-Tensai Train would have been better off debuting straight into a program with someone.
ReplyDeleteHow long before Jericho gets a "CM Drunk" chant going?
ReplyDeleteI hope your right. So can I assume from this that he'll be facing Punk at Summerslam then?
ReplyDeleteThey may as well bring back the Dusty Wolfs of the world if they are gonna do these jobber squash matches again.
ReplyDeletePunk is giving a good promo but the crowd is restless.
ReplyDeleteChris Jericho plays the role of douche down to perfection
ReplyDeleteHarsh words from a man in a Liberace jacket.
ReplyDeleteHe kind of reminds me of andrew dice clay
DeleteWow there are some douchebags in the crowd tonight....
ReplyDeleteJericho needs to interrupt next week's Punk segment with a Beer Truck.
ReplyDeleteDC is failing at being a rowdy crowd. There's being part of the show and then there's just acting like douches.
ReplyDelete2 12 packs!!!! hahaha i love douche bag jericho!
ReplyDeleteThink they might actually put the title on Henry?
ReplyDeleteDamn you, Punk. I was looking forward to more of Mark Henry putting the awesome badmouth on you.
ReplyDeleteThis would be a good spot for Kofi Kingston to save Punk. They have prior history, gives Kofi a bump and you can do Kofi/Henry at the ppv.
ReplyDelete"Stone Cold" Chris Jericho?
ReplyDeleteThis Punk-Jericho stuff is just getting awesome. I genuinely can't wait for them to tear each other apart at Extreme Rules, in the markiest way possible.
ReplyDeleteodds that Bryan doesn't even get on screen tonight?
ReplyDeleteWHAT A WASTE OF BEER!!!
ReplyDeleteDoes that mean he wrestles Mark Henry next?
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, but Lawler sounds absolutely retarded going off on Jericho here given the Jake Roberts angle circa '96.
ReplyDeleteI was really hoping he was going to pour a beer on the WWE title.
ReplyDeleteI thought about that too, but outside of "us" how many people actually remember that?
ReplyDeleteZero. They are gonna BURY him off live tv for a while after last week.
ReplyDeleteIt looks like he got them from Virgil.
ReplyDeleteIt's a terrible waste of alcohol. He could feed an italian family of 5 with that.
ReplyDeleteCan he at least use O'Douls?
ReplyDeleteI like to believe it's because they're saving him for the live Smackdown, but it seems like they've wisened up on how to best kill his heat. Sheamus and ADR haven't even showed up, either.
ReplyDeleteOh I know. But it only reinforces to me how much of a pathetic robotic shill Lawler has become. They could put anyone in his chair now and you wouldn't notice.
ReplyDeleteThe Hitler youth?
ReplyDeleteStone Cold is probably watching and is in tears due to how much good beer is being wasted.
ReplyDeleteIt did more to sell their PPV match than all of the B.S. Rock/Cena did all of last year.
ReplyDeleteOh joy, a Zack Ryder squash match. This time to Alberto Dorito.
ReplyDeleteBad example for the kids. Wasting beer, not rampant alcoholism
ReplyDeleteJA! JA! JA!
ReplyDeleteRicardo has a face I would never tire of punching. What a great heel
ReplyDeleteThank you. I said they look like underwear last week and someone gave me shit of it.
ReplyDeleteHe needs to get back to the Dr. doom look stat.
Cena should have finished by saying, "Why so serious?"
ReplyDeleteThis crowd fucking sucks. But they didn't screw up Vince's booking plans with any chants, so look for DC to get WrestleMania 30.
ReplyDeletei smell a quick ryder job...
ReplyDeleteAlbertoooooooooooooo DOOOOOOOOOOO RRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITOOOOOO
ReplyDeleteIn that anti-bullying promo, I guess I could see Sheamus being fat, but I really don't buy him ever being short.
ReplyDeleteThat was Cena's homage to the Three Stooges..
ReplyDeleteKeep pushing Del Rio down our throats, that's what we meant when we were chanting YES!
ReplyDeleteTo be fair, most of this show has been filler. Besides the opening and the Punk/Jericho segment, its been entirely forgettable.
ReplyDeleteSo. Fucking. Bad.
ReplyDeleteThe impression isnt bad but this is some lame stuff.
ReplyDeleteSweet Jesus....make it stop.
ReplyDeleteWow, the crowd is crapping all over this.
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious. Not the Stooges, but the crowd shitting all over it. Why the fuck does WWE think its fans care about this shit?
ReplyDeleteWow, he's got Hulk down pretty good....too bad this sucks.....I knew he was coming out lol
ReplyDeleteThank GOD. Kane is herre.
ReplyDeleteI'm guessing they called an audible there?
ReplyDeleteSasso takes better bumps than the Divas.
ReplyDeleteHe hasn't used wine yet. It's the Irish family you're thinking of.
ReplyDeleteReally Josh? With all the weird shit Mark Henry has done throughout his career, THAT is what you want an explanation for?
ReplyDeleteHeh - Mizark is gonna get fined for saying "World Heavyweight Champ".
ReplyDeleteMark got his titles wrong.
ReplyDeleteSo how many people didn't make it onto Raw tonight so they could instead promote a movie not made by WWE Films and pay homage to a wrestler not employed by WWE?
ReplyDeleteVince thinks it's funny.
ReplyDeleteHe helped pull apart Brock and Cena... and got a big pop for it. THat's his segment for the week.
ReplyDeleteThey can't hear the boos under the sound of 20th Century Fox's cheques clearing.
ReplyDeleteWhich wrestler is that? (I was watching American Dad)
ReplyDeleteThe same one that was on American Dad this season! How fitting.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, it amazes me that this guy has a Royal Rumble win, a Money in the Bank Ladder match win, and two WWE Title reigns under his belt, and no one gives a shit about him.
ReplyDeleteAnd now they're so desperate to get him over they're taking pages out of Eddie Guerrero's cheating playbook (as seen on Smackdown). It's been seven years, so I doubt any kids know who Eddie is.
The Brock is badass. Nuff said.
ReplyDeleteHot damn what an awesome interview....sign me up!
ReplyDeleteThat fat kid Barry?
ReplyDeleteJesus fucking christ, do you really have to have the entire roster blow your match at Wrestlemania? Get over yourselves.
ReplyDeleteOH for fucks sake. Daniel Bryan won't get on Raw but there is plenty of time for a hype video putting over two inactive old men? Fuck this shit. Save it for the DVD, there is nothing to prove by doing this.
ReplyDeleteImagine if they did one of this BJ videos for a match that featured guys who wrestle every week. I mean, hot damn, you could make a star!
ReplyDeleteI'm surprised Daniel Bryan would comment of any part of Wrestlemania that happened after his match.
ReplyDeleteThat would have been infinitely preferable to what we got. Nope it was Hogan.
ReplyDeleteYES! YES! YES!
ReplyDeleteOh yeah, Show. HHH/Taker was MUCH better than Flair/Steamboat..FOH.
ReplyDeleteHe definitely wanted to say World Wrestling Entertainment Champion...but realized that would be wrong since he paused after "World". It was pretty funny,
ReplyDeleteI know..I was joking. I was seeing if I still had my wits about me after the Stooges sketch. I felt like I was in that machine from the Princess Bride that sucked years out of you.
ReplyDeleteFurther proof that Triple H is the most insecure man in wrestling.
ReplyDeleteCan we just take a moment to congratulate the WWE on completely & totally throwing away Daniel Bryan's momentum in less than a week.
ReplyDeleteI mean, it REALLY takes a special company to take a wrestler on the verge of breaking out in a big way and render him meaningless that quickly.
I live across the street from the Verizon Center and people were chanting "YES!" outside by the Metro stop on my way home from work.
Not even a little Daniel Bryan tonight, WWE? Come out, wave to the audience, then step back into the dressing room?
ReplyDeleteNo? Oh, David Otunga in the main event. I see. OK.
So, who wants to bet at the end of the year, when WWE lists their greatest matches of the year on their website, Taker/Triple H is the greatest match of the year?
ReplyDelete