I was looking for your rant on WCW BattleBowl '93 because it was on WWE On Demand (A Ron Simmons heel turn? A poor man's Tatanka named Charlie Norris? HUSTLER RIP FREAKIN' ROGERS??? Why don't I remember ANY of this!?) and came across your rant for Uncensored '96, which was freaking hilarious. It also reminded me of this story:
About ten years ago or so, my friend Mike and I were having an argument over what was the worst PPV main event ever. I said it was Diesel vs. Mabel at SummerSlam at '95 purely for the workrate, Mike said it was Hogan vs. Beefcake at Starrcade '94 because it was Starrcade. The argument got so heated that we went to none other than Dave Meltzer, who answered the question on his Wrestling Observer Live show.
Turns out, we were BOTH wrong - Meltzer decreed it was the Doomsday Cage match at Uncensored '96, because not only did you have Hogan and Savage against EIGHT people, but out of a team that included Jeep Swenson, Zeus, Meng & the Barbarian, who ends up doing the job? Yep, you guessed it - Ric Flair.
So, yeah, this was the worst PPV main event of all time.
gave it -***** so that's a tough point to argue against. I can certainly confirm that I was howling with laughter at the stupidity of it all while watching it live. Yes, I ORDERED THAT SHOW in 1996 for some reason. Even before the days I made good money reviewing shit like that! What the fuck was WRONG with me?!
Whenever I have a shitty day, I just watch this main event and I am 10 times happier than I was before.ReplyDelete
I was living in England at the time and remember watching that awful abomination on some German channel that we got with our Sky satellite package.ReplyDelete
I loved that match. I was the biggest Hogan mark and my one friend was the biggest Flair mark and I was going wild. I miss being that way. I can still -enjoy- the workrate of Punk/Cena or whatever, and yes I cheer for Punk or Bryan to beat their foes, but I'll never feel the excitement I felt watching the shittiest WCW Saturday Night matches ever again.ReplyDelete
They should bring that cage back. The only thing bad about it was the guys in it. These days it could be Cena and Sheamus going through like Ryback, ADR, etc. Or Punk vs. "Heyman guys" (ex-ECW). Mattel would sell a lot of cages for the action figures too.ReplyDelete
"The only thing bad about it was the guys in it."ReplyDelete
Didn't it have some really convoluted rules also?
Yeah, like it being 8 vs 2 for one!ReplyDelete
I had just mentioned in another thread how Flair got buried by Bischoff in WCW. Flair taking the pin in the Cage of Doom match is a perfect example of that.ReplyDelete
Yeah, like "Only the movie stars in the bottom of the cage can be effective against Hogan and Savage".ReplyDelete
This brings up an interesting question:ReplyDelete
What IS the worst PPV at this time?
December to Remember?
Uncensored 96 (at least this had comedic value)?
Heroes of Wrestling?
Am I missing anything?
In high-school my friends and I were so stoked for this. We totally bought into the whole monster truck rally spectacle of it. Then they showed the first shot of Meng and Barbarian shredding lettuce on the walls of the cage...and for some reason Hogan and Savage left the cage for what felt like an eternity to wrestle Luger and Sullivan in the ring...only to return to the cage, for some reason, in order to fight EVERYBODY.ReplyDelete
I was getting worried for the Hulkamaniacs though, until the Deus Ex Booty Man saved the day. Good thing he spent six months under deep cover with the Dungeon of Doom or Hogan and Savage would have had no idea that the heels' greatest weakness was frying pans and white powder. Not even the mighty Ultimate Final Solution could stand up to that lethal combo.
Wasn't it December to Dismember?ReplyDelete
I think an even better question would be from your standpoint, what's worse? Perfectly acceptable wrestling which is boring and doesn't really lead anywhere, or something that's specatcularly bad that has some comedic value/has tons of unintentional comedy? I think I'd vote for the spectacularly bad....ReplyDelete
havoc 2000 is in the running, as is gab 99ReplyDelete
One of the worst main events ever has to be Hogan/Bischoff vs Leno/DDP.ReplyDelete
I thought the Doomsday cage match was pretty fun.ReplyDelete
Worst PPV main event: Arn Anderson/Paul E. Dangerously vs. Rick Steiner/Missy Hyatt in a Cage at Great American Bash 1991. The match was under two minutes.
No way. I've never even seen the match in question, but I've seen the garvin/Sullivan edition. It is god awful.ReplyDelete
I think what's worse is something that both insults your intelligence and offers no redeeming qualities whatsoever. The 96 Doomsday cage does the former, but is comedic enough that you get something out of it.ReplyDelete
HoW wasn't even funny, when you look at how Jake Roberts was. It was freakishly uncomfortable.
And as bad as Hogan-Warrior II was......wait, there's not much worse than Hogan-Warrior II. Hogan-Piper in the cage? Hogan-Savage in the cage?
They should have put this on the War Games DVD just for the lulz.ReplyDelete
From the rant: Now Luger runs in as well and turns the tide, using a loaded glove, but it hits Flair by mistake and Savage pins him at 25:09. This would prove to be the last hurrah for Hulkamania, as fan reaction to this mess was so overwhelmingly negative that his heel turn was necessary to keep his career alive.ReplyDelete
Read more athttp://www.411mania.com/wrestling/video_reviews/32707#R01zk84DZXLj4dRu.99
(So, I guess based on THAT line, this was Montreal for WCW??)
At least it was a quick death.ReplyDelete
Over the Edge 99ReplyDelete
They never did pay off that angle did they?ReplyDelete
My vote for worst PPV main event ever is Victory Road 2011.ReplyDelete
At least with those other ones you got what you paid for.
If you ever watch this back (which I don't recommend doing), check out the beginning when Hogan and Bischoff make their entrance. Bischoff, in his never-ending attempt to try to look cool, puts his arm around Miss Elizabeth and it's so freaking awkward. As they walk towards the ring, she visibly tries to get away from him and eventually does.ReplyDelete
Check it out for a laugh. Go to the 2:09 point of this video and watch Eric and Liz up until the 2:57 at which point Liz finally breaks free. Then X out your browser and forget we even talked about this stupid match.
Assuming you mean December to Dismember, the weapons EC match just suffered from horrid booking, not match quality. At least in my humble opinion. It was better than the Cage of Doom at least.ReplyDelete
Not sure if that really counted as the main event. God knows why that match was last, but the real main event was the Luger/Windham match.ReplyDelete
I think we can all look back on this match and laugh which is the benefit of hindsight. Back in early 1996 though I can understand people being really upset with it though.ReplyDelete
In another thread somebody argued that WCW wasn't really trying to bury Flair in the mid-to-late 90s. Flair doing the job in the Doomsday Cage match is all the evidence you need to prove otherwise.ReplyDelete
I love that he smuggled in frying pans. Granted, being hit with a frying pan would hurt like hell....but if I was planning ahead of time it wouldn't be my first choice of weapons unless I was trying to fend off Elmer Fudd.ReplyDelete
I ordered it too, but in my defense I was 11.ReplyDelete
King of the Ring 95 (birth of King Mabel)ReplyDelete
So the crowd would get sent home happy? BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAReplyDelete
Seriously, that's probably what they though. After delivering that piece of shit card with heels going over in a lot of the big matches (Koloff over Sting, Studd over Z-Man, Luger heel turn), all after firing their biggest and best star, they probably thought, "Well, Rick Steiner's gonna win his match in 2 minutes, that'll get a pop and send the crowd home happy!!"
How did Buffer enunciate all those words with Hogan's cock in his mouth?ReplyDelete
Heroes of Wrestling was top to bottom awful, at least the other shows had some redeeming qualities or star power. Like Uncensored 96 had a pretty decent Konnan/Guerrero match and a hellastiff Regal/Finaly match.ReplyDelete
Uncensored 95 is pretty shitty, too.
That show had Lawler FINALLY getting comeuppance against Bret Hart, so that's something.ReplyDelete
Also, Flair was World Champion in that match. With seven other guys in the match (including two who were there for that once shot) he didn't have to be the one to lay down.ReplyDelete
Buffer's ego also allows him to talk out of his ass.ReplyDelete
"Flair got buried in WCW the minute Hogan came in"ReplyDelete
A couple of days ago.
Dude made a million dollars per announcement.ReplyDelete
Fuck Hogan, Michael Buffer worked the shit out of Ted Turner and Bischoff!
Speaking of Buffer, here's a quote from a review of Mayhem 2000 on CRZ's archives: "I can't express how dumb it is that WCW is losing so much money, yet they keep bringing that crooked son of a bitch MICHAEL BUFFER in every month".ReplyDelete
What exactly did he do to deserve that quote?
Worst Main Event ever was the three team War games at Fall BrawlReplyDelete
Not sure, but he's a known .ReplyDelete
Sting vs Jake Roberts at Halloween Havoc sucked as well.ReplyDelete
I don't know about being 'crooked' - but he was being paid a lot of money for no reason. He got names wrong a few times ("Hitman Bret Clarke"), and do you really need to pay someone extra to do ring introductions for a Goldberg-Meng match?ReplyDelete
December to Dismember had a pretty good Hardy Boys/MNM tag-match, even if the rest of the event was pretty bad.ReplyDelete
The cage was too ridiculous, too high, and too hard to actually see what's going on. On a 3 story-high cage you can't do high spots, you can't really do much of anything (because your floor is a cage 3 stories high, not a wrestling mat) - the best you could get out of is some good brawling. And there are better ways to have good brawls.ReplyDelete
It's a stupid idea. If Vince isn't willing to put on Wargames because someone else thought of it, why on earth would he bring this abomination out of mothballs?
Kinda fell flat.ReplyDelete
Maybe they had a version of Brandon Stroud's dry erase board back then, and the only thing written on it was "Ric Flair jobs to Hulk Hogan."ReplyDelete
"Flair got buried in WCW the minute Hogan came in"ReplyDelete
Lots of people
Almost 20 years ago on RSPW
First time watcher...It was too silly and goofy to be a -***** match. Not many times in Hogan's career did he participate in a 25-minute brawl with limited resting.ReplyDelete
Overall the concept was stupid and the execution was a little strange at the end with Hogan trying to escape while Savage is like...'um bro, don't we need to pin someone' and runs back in, pins Ric Flair to actually win the match while Hulk is half way around on his victory lap.
Did Dusty come up with this one as well?
Nothing crooked about it IMO. He trademarked "Let's get ready to rumble", and charged high dollar for his services. Bischoff was the dumbass willing to pay it for friggin Nitros. Capitalism at its finest.ReplyDelete
I was 10 or 11 when this happened and I loved it. IDGAF about workrate or quality, this was sheer over the top ridiculousness and i ate it right up. Imagine doing this but having it be a genuine hardcore style bloodbath? Awesome.ReplyDelete
I wonder what she whispered to Bischoff at the end?ReplyDelete
That type of humor's not gonna fly on this new PG site...ReplyDelete
"I'm not wearing panties"ReplyDelete
I am currently watching this....totally f'n ridiculous. How did Hogan sell this to WCW brass? That being said, I love Savage so I still enjoy the outcome just like in '96.ReplyDelete
Yeah Savage bumped his ass off where he could to at least sell the idea of a rough fight.ReplyDelete
As Murphy said, there's always a place for some over the top silliness and if you can't laugh at for what it is than life is too serious.
My bad, I was 12 and still in mark-mode (for the most part)ReplyDelete
I TOTALLY FORGOT!ReplyDelete
THe filthy Animals LITERALLY BURIED FLAIR in the Vegas desert!
I mean you can't get any worse than that.
It depends on how old you were when you initially watched it. I was 16...ReplyDelete
You just don't see Malenko, Guerrero and Benoit for the first time on WCWSN and Starrcade 95 busting out all these crazy Jap moves and then see this and accept it.
I can appreciate camp in my wrestling, I grew up on it being a WWF fan from 86, but by 96, I was into way more things. At 16 EVERYTHING WAS SERIOUS /sarcasm
I wanted a more mature wrestling. Once I saw Benoit for the fist time at WW3 95/STarrcade 96, that was it. The days of Hogan were gone. And my viewing of ECW was right around the corner.
I think it was Sullivan, bischoff, and hogan booking the stuff at the time.ReplyDelete
Didn't anyone have the black box for ppvs then like me?ReplyDelete
ECW just introduced the frying pan bit to their matches at the time so naturally wcw wanted to emulate it.ReplyDelete
King of the ring 95. UghReplyDelete
And to think, 4 months later, the same company would be airing the most riveting and entertaining programming in the history of wrestling, before or since.ReplyDelete
HE RUINED MY SHEEN!!!ReplyDelete
The Doomsday Cage Match is the original Hulk Hogan sex tape. Hogan jerking off (his ego) while fucking (over) eight guys at once.ReplyDelete
1%. I watched it on ScrambleVision.ReplyDelete
I'm so glad BattleBowl '93 is on WWE Classics right now. I never thought I'd ever get to see the show, and I'm giddy I've gotten to finally enjoy it in all of its WrestleCrap glory. It was like this Holy Grail of terrible shows I thought would never again see the light of day.ReplyDelete
"Get your fucking arm off me or I'll tell Randy you made a pass at me."ReplyDelete
Liz in jeans and motherfucking LEATHER CHAPS = Holy fuck.ReplyDelete
Heroes of Wrestling: Worst PPV and PPV main event ever. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SnU8rsBHjq0ReplyDelete
Speaking of Dusty, can we finally give him a pass on all the times he hogged the limelight with the creation of the Wyatt family?ReplyDelete
The most crazy thing about this match is, that it was only two months before Scott Hall came in as the first Outsider - but it feels like lightyears.ReplyDelete
Well it was on one of those late 1980's NWA PPV's, so it was probably him, or did it start in World class?ReplyDelete
His credibilty was six feet under WAY before that too, how sad is that?ReplyDelete
Its almost like there should be a different category for HOW or other indy PPV's. . Not defending or excusing them, but its not as fair to compare their shit to WWF/E or WCW crap when they had a much larger budget to fuckup. . .ReplyDelete
Well, there was WM 9 first. . .ReplyDelete
No! No! No! A thousand times no!ReplyDelete
*ahem* Seriously, the guy is really intelligent when it comes to wrestling, but remember: this is a guy who booked himself to be suspended, then came back and wore a mask, then beat Ric Flair for the world title but forfeited the win b/c the title required him to remove the mask.
WHO DOES THAT? WHY?