Monday Nitro #142
Date: June 22, 1998
Location: Jacksonville
Memorial Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Attendance: 8,749
Commentators: Mike
Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Larry Zbyszko
Reviewed by Tommy Hall
The main story we've
got tonight is the signing of Karl Malone for a match at Bash at the
Beach. WCW's obsession with celebrities got annoying after awhile
but to be fair, they had far bigger problems than wrestling
basketball players. Other than that we'll likely get a lot more
about the NWO civil war, which hasn't been so much of a war as much
as it's been a lot of talking. Let's get to it.
We open with promises
of clips from the Karl Malone press conference later.
Opening sequence.
The announcers talk
about the tag match for a bit.
We look at Hogan and
Rodman attacking Page with chairs a few weeks ago.
We get a clip from the
Tonight Show with Hogan and Rodman as guests making fun of Malone for
losing in the NBA Finals.
Here's DDP with
something to say. This is going to be one of those shows with one
topic of discussion all night isn't it? Page says he's jacked to be
in Jacksonville. He talks about how he's looking forward to the
match at the Bash because it's personal between him and Hogan. Page
wants a piece of Hogan but not as much as Malone wants a piece of
Rodman.
Disco Inferno vs.
Len Denton
Denton is most famous
for his work in Portland Wrestling as the Grappler. Disco pounds him
down to start and hits his swinging neckbreaker for two. We even get
something resembling a People's Elbow for a nice reaction from the
crowd. Denton makes a jobber style comeback but gets caught by some
clotheslines and a piledriver gets the pin for Disco.
Here's NFL player Kevin
Greene to no reaction at all. He talks about the Jacksonville
Jaguars and the Carolina Panthers for several minutes with the fans
dying more and more every second. This brings out Rude and Hennig to
tell him to get out of their ring but Kevin wants a fight. Giant
jumps Greene from behind to finally get a reaction from the crowd.
Post break JJ makes
Giant vs. Greene for tonight. Great, more sports stars dominating
the show.
Tokyo Magnum vs.
Yuji Nagata
The name graphic says
“Tokoyo”. Tokyo dances a lot so Nagata pounds him in the face
and claps a lot. The announcers mention Tokyo being an Ultimo Dragon
student as he comes back with a forearm. Yuji sends him to the floor
so Sonny can get in some kicks to take over. Back in and we
get.....wait for it......wait for it......more kicking!
A leg lock has Tokyo in
trouble as the announcers talk about a bunch of sports stars instead
of wrestling. Various leg locks abound and a standing ax kick puts
Magnum down. Nagata misses a running knee in the corner and Tokyo
scores with a dropkick for two. Not that it matters as a spinwheel
kick to the face sets up the Nagata Lock to make Magnum tap.
Rating:
D-. I'm thoroughly over these kicking matches. They wind up being
nothing but kicking various body parts and leg locks before a big
kick and a big leg lock ends it. Nagata isn't terrible in the ring
but he has the personality of the tree in my front yard. Nothing to
see here at all.
Raven talks about
Saturn betraying him in his usual style.
We cut to the back
where Stevie Ray has attacked Benoit.
Public Enemy vs.
Sick Boy/Horace
This match actually has
rules for a change. Public Enemy runs them over, knocking the Flock
members to the floor. Back in and it's Rocco working on Sick Boy's
arm to start things off. Off to Grunge for a shot to the chest and a
double flapjack before Horace comes in, only to be taken down for a
double elbow drop. The Flock finally gets their act together and
snaps Rocco's neck across the top rope to take over.
Sick Boy whips him into
the corners a few times, only to get caught in a sunset flip for two.
The bad guys take turns stomping mudholes in Rocco before Horace
gets two off a side slam. Rocco gets clotheslined out to the floor
before coming back inside to avoid a charge in the corner. The
announcers ignore the match to talk about football and basketball
players as Horace accidentally hits Sick Boy with a stop sign. Rocco
comes off the top and drives the sign into Horace for the pin.
Rating: D.
So to clarify it was a match with rules but two shots with a stop
sign are perfectly legal? The match was nothing to see for the most
part but the commentators ruined anything it had going for it by
talking about the sports guys for the majority of the match. Flock
wasn't terrible here actually.
The Nitro Girls are now
in NWO shirts and no one seems to notice.
Here's Bret Hart with
something to say. Bret shushes Gene and hopes WCW is happy for
turning one Canadian against another. He remembers Benoit (his
opponent tonight) being a little kid running around in Calgary and
now the Americans have turned him into another punk kid. Nothing
special here but there's nothing wrong with hyping a match for later
in the show.
We get even more
Tonight Show footage with Page and Malone coming out to face Rodman
and Hogan. A fight nearly broke out and this goes on way too long.
This was before the match was officially announced but the news had
leaked weeks earlier anyway.
Hour #2 begins.
US Title: Goldberg
vs. Rick Fuller
Goldberg takes him down
and grabs the ankle before hitting a botched spear (it looked more
like a tackle/spinebuster with Full taking a few steps back before
going down) and the Jackhammer to retain.
Annoying fans talked
about Rodman earlier today.
The announcers talk
about Kevin Greene again.
More kids talking about
the celebrity match. Good grief we get it already.
Here's the Wolfpack
with something to say. Everyone hits their catchphrases before Sting
talks to a mannequin which apparently proves that this is Wolfpack
country. Being Nash's partner makes him a medium sized giant killer
and promises to defend the titles anywhere anytime. Nash says too
sweet....and that's it. Short promos tonight.
Fans talking about
basketball players again.
Nitro Girls in silver.
Alex Wright vs.
Eddie Guerrero
The announcers are
talking about the basketball players before the bell even rings.
Alex takes him down to start and stomps away before dancing a bit.
Eddie comes back with a jumping back elbow and some chops in the
corner but Alex pokes him in the eye. A backbreaker allows Alex to
dance a bit more and get a delayed two. Eddie dropkicks him down so
Alex bails to the floor for a breather. Back in and a quick suplex
gets two for Wright but he misses a top rope knee drop. Eddie comes
back with the brainbuster as Chavo comes out to cheer. The
distraction lets Wright grab a suplex for the pin.
Rating: D.
This was mainly about waiting on Chavo to show up which is fine for a
story but the match hasn't been anything to see so far. Wright
continues to be fun to watch and talented in the ring and Eddie is
Eddie, but this match had nothing to it at all. It gets rather dull
waiting thirty seconds between moves you know?
Chavo grabs a mic and
talks about playing Monopoly the night before and landing on Park
Place with three hotels even though he owned the place. Eddie:
“YOU'RE WACKO!” Chavo: “No that's Chavo. C-h-a-v-o,
C-h-a-v-o, C-h-a-v-o and Chavo is my name-o.” He keeps talking
about Monopoly as we go to a break.
More fans, more Rodman,
more aspirin for me.
Back from a break and
we get MORE fans talking about the tag match.
Konnan vs. Scotty
Riggs
Konnan grabs the arm
and hits the rolling clothesline before pulling on his pants. Riggs
trips him up and scores with a dropkick. After some quick choking he
sends Konnan out to the floor for a decent looking plancha. Back in
and they botch a leapfrog with Konnan landing on Riggs' back before a
clothesline gets two on Scotty. A rollup gets the same result but a
Lodi distraction lets Riggs get in a cheap shot to take over. Riggs
powerslams him down for two but misses a missile dropkick. The
Tequila Sunrise gets the submission a second later.
Rating: D+.
Riggs is another good example of a guy who was just there. He didn't
have anything unique or special in his offense and was little more
than a warm body that wouldn't screw anything up horribly. Konnan
continues to be charismatic but not the best in ring worker to put it
mildly.
The announcers talk
about the basketball match again.
Now we get to see the
freaking press conference announcing the match where the ball players
cut promos on each other.
Hour #3 begins.
Steve McMichael vs.
Stevie Ray
Are they actively
trying to tick the fans off? That's a serious question. They can't
think this is the most entertaining thing they could put on right
now. Stevie wins a quick slugout to start and kicks Mongo down as
the announcers talk about how tough Mongo was because of his football
career. Mongo comes back with right hands and some choking as we
take a break. Yes, in THIS match.
Back with Ray kicking
Mongo down again before calling someone in the crowd a sucka. An
elbow drop gets two and Stevie is getting frustrated. We hit the
chinlock to keep the match at its dull pace until Mongo fights up and
kicks to the ribs. The “fight” heads out to the floor with Ray
being sent into the barricade before grabbing a chair. Benoit comes
out and takes it away but Booker takes the chair from Chris. It's a
four way staredown and the match just ends.
Rating: F.
Let this show end soon before I injure myself.
Here's the Black and
White with something to say. Bischoff talks about how amazing Hogan
is and makes jokes about breaking Savage's leg. Hogan says Liz only
stayed with Savage because of the money because Savage clearly wasn't
much of a man. He talks about the basketball match (it had been a
full five minutes after all) for several minutes while saying nothing
at all. Tony: “What have they done to our sport?” That should
be the title of this episode. Hogan actually gets up close to the
camera and says he'll be a sixty minute man at Bash at the Beach.
I've heard that was actually the plan until sanity sat in.
We look back at Benoit
turning down the win over Booker due to Bret's interference.
Chris Benoit vs.
Bret Hart
If this is anything
less than perfect, this is in the running for most worthless Nitro
ever. Benoit snaps off a quick armdrag to start before Bret drives
him into the corner for a surprisingly clean break. Benoit takes him
down by the arm again and hooks an armbar as we're still in first
gear here. Bret fights up and scores with a hard DDT for no cover.
Benoit comes back with some hard forearms to the head but Hart rocks
him with European uppercuts. A middle rope elbow (not the middle
rope elbow) misses Benoit and Chris chops him down.
Benoit is sent out to
the floor and rammed back first into the post. Bret pounds away at
Benoit's head before heading back inside to pose a bit. A piledriver
(not a tombstone Tony) gets two on Benoit and Bret is getting
frustrated. We take a break with Heenan talking about Kevin Greene
and come back with Bret getting two off something we didn't see. The
Russian legsweep gets another near fall on Benoit and Bret's counter
to an O'Connor Roll gets the same.
Bret takes too much
time yelling at the referee and gets caught in two rolling Germans
and a dragon suplex for no cover. A snap suplex looks to set up the
Swan Dive but Bret rolls away. Bret goes up top very slowly and gets
superplexed down for a close two. The fans are finally into
something tonight. A short arm clothesline gets two more for Benoit
so he slaps on the Crossface. Bret can't make the rope but here's
Stevie Ray for a distraction, allowing Bret to knock Benoit out cold
with a foreign object. Bret puts on the Sharpshooter for the win
since Benoit is out cold.
Rating: B-.
The match was getting good by the ending but we just needed a
worthless guy with limited talent to screw up the ending. Benoit got
a good rub here and I get why they can't have Bret do a job, but can
we please get Benoit a win? It doesn't even have to be anything big.
Just let him submit say....El Dandy. I'd take that at this point.
The announcers recap
the Kevin Greene stuff in case you've only been watching for 85
seconds.
Kevin Greene vs.
Giant
Greene is in street
clothes which at least helps with some realism. He pounds away on
Giant in the corner but gets caught by a single elbow to the face. A
low blow slows Giant down and here's Hennig for the DQ after maybe 75
seconds.
The rest of the Black
and White comes in for the group beatdown until Goldberg (Green's old
teammate) makes the save. Greene throws out a challenge for a tag
match at Bash at the Beach against Giant/Hennig to end the show.
Overall Rating: D-.
Only Benoit vs. Hart kept this from being a failure but it's by a
hair. This was TERRIBLE with the basketball and Kevin Greene talk
killing this show right out of the box. I was a huge NBA fan in the
90s but even I was getting sick of hearing about it back then. The
commentary and lack of anything (save for the Canadians) else being
good crippled this show for three very long hours. They can't
possibly think this is a good show. I almost mean that literally:
they couldn't look at this show on paper and think it was going to
beat whatever Raw was offering. They couldn't be that stupid.
Remember to check out my website at kbwrestlingreviews.com and head over to my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:
http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6
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