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Matt's Main Event Recap: 7/22/2014

Tonight, we're supposed to have Sheamus and Rusev which tickles me so.

Let's get moving.

We are LIVE(!) from the Amway Arena in Orlando, Florida!

Byron Saxton and Tom Phillips are the guys in the booth.

TONIGHT: Details about Steph's arrest last night.

ALSO: Rusev takes on...SWAGGER?! Wait...what happened to Sheamus?

Seth Rollins comes out to the ring to start us out tonight.with so much oil in his hair, Russia's upset that Europe signed a pipeline deal with his head.

Rollins is about to speak and...Fandango's out here. Now. To wrestle. Wrestle Seth Rollins.

Seth, whose Inner Admiral Ackbar is suddenly set to "OFF", accepts this.

SETH!!! HEY!!!


MATCH #1: Seth Rollins vs. Fandango
Fandango hits a dropkick off a whip to start. Rollins takes a breather outside and gets back in the ring, kicking and stomping at Fandango. Fandango fights back but Rollins trips him and sends Fandango's head into the lower turnbuckle. He stomps at Fandango again and puts him in a side headlock. Fandango breaks free with a Snap Mare and backslide pin for two. A rush in the corner ends in a Sunset Flip by Fandango for two. Fandango tries to lock Rollins' head with his legs but Rollins Powerbombs him into the top buckle and then hits the Curb Stomp for the win at 3:08.
WINNER: Seth Rollins via Curb Stomp
GRADE: * (LOOK! STARS!)

Post-match...no Ambrose. So, Creative actually said, "Rollins should face Fandango"?
ON RAW: Editing makes it look like Triple H originally chose Brock Lesnar and not Orton.

AT SUMMERSLAM: John Cena will defend the title against Brock Lesnar.

NEXT: Jey Uso is in singles action.

We get an ad for WrestleMania Rewind starring Rey Mysterio.

MATCH #2: Jey Uso (w/ Jimmy Uso) vs. Ryback (w/ Curtis Axel)
First lock-ups go nowhere for about the first 90 seconds. Ryback gets in Jey's face after he dances and they start trading shots. Ryback misses two clotheslines and Jey slides out of the ring to chill with Jimmy. Jey gets back in and tries a Sunset Flip which Ryback counters with a Back Drop. Jimmy gets stuck in a headlock but fights out and gets another Sunset Flip for two. Ryback charges but gets stuck in two roll-ups for a couple two-counts. Jey slaps at Ryback, then goes off the top rope but Ryback catches him with a Spinebuster. Ryback goes for the Meathook but Jey catches him and hits the Samoan Drop. Jey hits SHADESOFRIKISHI because that's what that move is called now. Axel interferes and Jey knocks him off the mat. Jey turns around and gets caught with the Meat Hook, getting the win for Ryback at 4:47.
WINNER: Ryback via Meat Hook
GRADE: **

Do the Usos ever win outside a major Pay Per View?
TONIGHT: Jack Swagger will take on Rusev.

Renee Young has Heath Slater and Titus O'Neil who looks less than excited. Their team is called Slater Gator. Titus goes full Dennis Haysbert and tells him they're "not a damn team" and Heath needs to sit down and shut up. He walks off. Heath tells Renee that Titus didn't mean that. They're gonna be the next great tag team. Whoo! Slater Gator! Yep. Slater Gator, folks. 

We get an ad for Road to Paloma.

FRIDAY ON SMACKDOWN: Roman Reigns will face Alberto Del Rio who is still, frustratingly, being billed as "the former World Champion" in order to drum up excitement.

MATCH #3: Slater Gator (Heath Slater & Titus O'Neil) vs. Big E & Kofi Kingston (w/ Xavier Woods)
Woods is E and Kofi's new manager. He even stole Brother Love's suit so we'd all think "evil". Kofi and Titus start things off. Kofi slaps Titus. Titus hits back and hits a series of backbreakers and then just tosses Kofi away like a newspaper. Slater tags himself in and stomps Kofi. Kofi gets up and starts punching back but Slater pushes Kofi into the heel corner. Kofi tries to fight his way out but Slater catches him by the hair. Titus and Slater argue. Kofi escapes to get the hot tag and punches at Titus. Kofi takes out Slater. E picks up Titus. Kofi and E hit the Doomsday Device...but the match just goes on. Slater is in the match and he gets a Doomsday Device as Malcolm X-avier yells at E to stack the two up and pin them. E does at 3:21.
WINNERS: Big E & Kofi
GRADE: 1/2*

Post-match, Woods barks and makes overdone motions with his arms like a chicken on steroids as E and Kofi still look like they have no idea why they're in this gimmick when they were already successful.

Renee Young interviews Zeb and Swagger. He says America and Russia have both contributed to the world -- but Russia has only given "Vodka" -- and they've been all slamming it non-stop. He calls Rusev "Boris" again but, having blown the joke on the first two occasions by calling him "Bullwinkle", it seems forced. Oh well. WE THE PEOPLE, I guess.

We get an ad for SummerSlam.

LAST NIGHT: Flo Rida performed about the only two songs he's ever done.

Renee Young is backstage with both Slater and Gator. Titus says he knew it wasn't gonna work out. Slater's an albatross and he's "always been bad luck". He walks off. Slater says Titus is joking. This will work! Whoo! Slater Gator, Renee. Slater Gator.

FROM RAW: Brie wants to know what kind of Human Bean Steph is and calls her a bitch. HHH's Hybrid line ("Is thi--is this a HYBRID?! You guys must be very proud of yourselves! What a great gig you've got here...") cracks me up every single time.

(Danielle informs me that Brie should have been arrested, too, because "fighting back" counts as "assault" in Florida.)

At ringside, Tom Phillips tells us to go to WWE.com for ANY developments in this situation.
Rusev and Lana go to the ring for the main event.

We get an ad for WWE Countdown.

FRIDAY ON SMACKDOWN: Dean Ambrose vs. Cesaro in a No-DQ Match, so I hope that you all delight in Michael Cole should remind you all that "this is all legal" about 73 times during the match.

Lana says America surrendered a long time ago. Today, in New York City, somebody put a white flag in the place of the American flag on the Brooklyn Bridge. Putin is zee best. You know the drill.

Swagger is out next.

MATCH #4: Rusev (w/ Lana) vs. Jack Swagger (w/ Zeb Colter)
Rusev is limping slightly. Swagger tries to trip him up and gets to a leg but Rusev holds the ropes. Swagger gets a hold from behind but Rusev elbows out. Rusev is all over Swagger in the corner and runs Swagger from corner to corner. He tosses Swagger into the ropes but Swagger holds on. Rusev charges and Swagger tosses him out of the ring. Rusev can't stand on his injured foot and hobbles around. We go to break.
Ad for WWEShop.com

After break, Rusev kicks Swagger in the chest, knocking him down. He chokes at Swagger against the ropes and Swagger rolls out of the ring. Rusev chases and puts Swagger's head into the barricades and steel steps. Back in the ring, Swagger tries for the ankle again but Rusev kicks Swagger. Rusev puts Swagger in an armbar while stepping on his head, then converts it into a chinlock. Swagger powers out and kicks at Rusev as he charges Swagger in the corner, then Swagger hits a HUGE clothesline. 

Swagger tries the Swagger Bomb but Rusev puts his boot up. Swagger counters and hits the Patriot Lock but Rusev breaks it and goes outside the ring. Swagger chases and clotheslines Rusev in the head, hitting the Patriot Lock. Rusev kicks out, then grabs the Russian flag, nailing Swagger with it.
WINNER: Jack Swagger via DQ
GRADE: **

Post-match, Rusev climbs into the ring, ready to do some damage to Swagger. Zeb, however, grabs the Russian flag from him and gives it to Lana. Rusev screams at Colter. Swagger nails Rusev with a clothesline, knocking Rusev out of the ring, then gets the American flag from Colter, waving it as we go off the air.
OVERALL: About a * for me. This was just by-the-numbers and didn't advance much. A fight against Sheamus would have been slightly better than Rusev/Swagger.

Er...that's it.

--

I'll be back next week, same time, same website. Thursday's double-feature day with the great Scott Keith's NXT report and Danielle's Total Divas recap/rant. Tommy will cover Smackdown to take you into your weekend and Andy PG will be back to start your week off right with the PG Era Raw Rant on Monday.

Thank you to all the BoD'ers and, hey, if you wanna read more of our stuff, please check me out at The Daily DDT (http://dailyddt.com/author/mattlperri/) for all my wrestling editorials and opinion, visit WE HATE YOUR GIMMICK at http://wehateyourgimmick.blogspot.com and, of course, visit us on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/groups/wehateyourgimmick/.

Comments

  1. There's been some discussion about whether this is truly Style's best match and several TNA matches are being offered as alternatives, which makes me wonder why nothing from his ROH run has been brought up. Off the top of my head, though, I'm not recalling any ROH classics from Styles (outside of some well received tag matches with Amazing Red against The Briscoes). Was Jimmy Rave Style's only memorable ROH rivalry, his only notable match with that company, or are there some classics that I'm forgetting?

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  2. I remember a Low-Ki match, but vaguely. Might look it up later...

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  3. Anyone else watching Night 2 live right now? Ishii & Kojima are killing it, and this crowd couldn't possibly be any hotter for it..

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  4. Aj was good in ROH, but he only spent two very young years there--it makes semse his best came later as he matured.

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  5. You gotta see the match he just pulled out of Yano.. this last 6 months of working unknowns with less talent than he's used to, has actually taken one of the world's best, and elevated him to an even higher level..

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  6. Tanahashi looking as much like HBK right now in this main event as one possibly could..

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  7. Man, I think people are really sleeping on Tanahashi/ Homna from night one. That was a real fun match.

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  8. Shit yeah, they'd only wrestled twice in 10 years, and never for those kind of stakes.. A memorable encounter, no doubt.. Better than any match on Night 2, and Night 2 was great...

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  9. Just getting to Okada/AJ. Been pretty busy and trying not to fall too far behind. Okada with the shit eating grin, and pointing to his ear when the crowd is chanting for him followed by AJ's ridiculous "BULLET CLUB!" has me in already.

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  10. "Hey, here's an excellent match! Check it out!" would have sufficed, but we gotta troll for comments.....which looks like it worked, so congratulations buddy!

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  11. I haven't been able to watch a 45+ minute match all the way through in at least 12 years. Especially if it doesn't have a story attached to it because goddamn....two guys fake beating on each other for no reason whatsoever for 60 minutes is boooooorrring. I'm married....I have chores to do, goddamnit!

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  12. I like watching Brock hurt people.

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  13. I don't much care about Brock, but he's a well known name in the mainstream and certainly credible. I'm actually most looking forward to the title being off TV every week just to see how they compensate for it.

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  14. Brock definitely should be undefeated going into SummerSlam.

    Especially if the plan is to use him to replace Undertaker as the WM attraction.

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  15. When is his contract up? Does he renew every year? After allowing him to end the streak and now take the title, the need to rework his contract to allow him to work more dates. Not house shows, but more Raws and ppvs. I know the WWE is cutting back big time, but shelling out more for Brock could help them with the Network buys right now.

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  16. Yeah, I don't know why Brock just doesn't agree to be a regular Raw/PPV guy. He knows they'll pay his ass whatever he wants.

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  17. Brocks problems are Vince had to have lose the first match back because it was some kind of shot at the ufc no one cared about but him, and HHH had to work a massive feud with him NO ONE wanted to see. Either Cena or Punk should have gotten the trilogy with Brock. Those matches were boring and a major letdown after the Cena match, and I'll say this again NO ONE wanted to see Huntor the barbarian go toe to toe with Lesnar.

    I was in the arena for HHH vs Brock part 1 and no one gave a shit and his post match attempt at the sympathy pop was such a failure it was awkward to watch.

    I'd say say this. Does anyone really think the wwe woukd be better off without Lesnar? He's an important part of the product and gives them some much needed star power at the top of the card. Can you imagine these a shows without him?

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  18. All Cena all the time.

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  19. He doesn't want to work the schedule and they'll still pay him whatever he wants to work like 12 dates including like 3 matches in a year.

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  20. Great match, not best of his career though. AJ has had so many 4*+ matches in his career, if there's ever anyone in the past 15 years with more forgotten classics, I don't know who. I really wanna rewatch the Styles/Danielson ROH title match now though, been a long time since I saw it.

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  21. AverageJoeEverymanJuly 23, 2014 at 11:06 AM

    id say more so 1996

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  22. To be fair though, if you prefer the Stephanie/Brie angle to the G1 Climax Tournament, you probably deserve a little ribbing.

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  23. True, but still....this guy is a dick.

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  24. Thus far, Homns strikes me as one of the least interesting guys in the company. All I know him as is the guy who really likes falling headbutts, but yeah, he really brought it in that match. Actually had the fans on his side in some portions, which I imagine is a big deal with Tanahashi.

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  25. Honestly, I feel the same way about the guy. Sometimes I feel uncomfortable watching him because he lands in his head so much. But, his connection with the crowd is undeniable. It's airways exciting to watch a match that had the fanbase excited.

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  26. Yeah, Yano has really stepped up his game. I don't quite want to call him the BitW yet, but he's on his way.

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