The PG Era Rant for Raw, September 15,
2014.
Pre-show preview:
- John Cena and Brock Lesnar are both in the building and will have a face-off.
- Roman Reigns faces Seth Rollins – not on Sunday, but tonight!
- Mark Henry will hold an All-American rally.
- AJ Lee and Brie Bella face Paige and Nikki Bella.
- Bray Wyatt takes on the Big Show.
Live from Lafayette, Louisiana.
Your hosts are JBL, Kang, and Maggle.
Ladies and gentlemen, the name of our
first speaker is Paul Heyman. He promises a preview of Sunday. John
Cena will emerge first (Heyman imitates Cena's music), and the kids
will cheer. Then Brock will emerge (boo all you want, he says,
because it's going to get worse). If you think Cena got hurt at
Sum...
...wait, here's Cena. JBL: “If I
were Heyman I would make a phone call.” Cena scans the crowd, then
asks where Brock is. Heyman tries to double-talk his way out of the
question, but Cena reminds us that Cena's going to fight SOMEONE, and
if Brock's not there, he'll send a message through Heyman. Heyman
asks why Cena wants to give the fight away for free... but heck,
it'll happen! Heyman's clearly stalling before introducing The
Pain...
...or not. Heyman had Cena psyched out
for nothing. See, Brock Lesnar has a private jet because he hates
everyone. As such, he's delayed, but he'll be here soon enough. But
Cena knew that, right? He knew it so he could call Brock out and not
have a reply. Smart move, John. You had Heyman going for a second,
but that was smart.
But Cena won't let Heyman leave,
grabbing him by the neck. “I think you're full of crap. But here
is what I know.” Remember Cena demanding Brock Lesnar? He gives
Lesnar until 9:30 to show up or Heyman will take the beating instead.
Heyman says he'll be waiting for Lesnar
and walks out... but Cena cuts him off. Cena doesn't trust Paul
Heyman, and hey, Lafayette wants a fight, so Cena will make sure they
get it. Cena's not going to let Heyman escape, dragging him to the
back.
Highlights of last week's main event
post-match chaos.
Hopefully – and I know I'm
probably in the minority when I say this – we'll get some good
backstage stuff of Cena playing mind games with Heyman. BANG 3:16
was my favorite Stone Cold antic.
If you had the WWE App, you would've seen John Cena lock Paul Heyman
in his dressing room and ask the Great Khali to keep him in there. I
didn't know Cena spoke Punjabi.
Chris Jericho v. Corporate Kane.
Kane goes CLUBBERIN, THEY BE CLUBBERIN TONY to start. Jericho gets
a back elbow and low bridges Kane out. The springboard dropkick
keeps Kane outside, and Jericho goes up top and dives onto Kane.
Jericho runs into an uppercut, though, and Kane sends Jericho into
the apron. Back in, it gets two. Jericho vaults over Kane on a
cross-corner whip and gets an enzuigiri and dropkick for two.
Jericho with more kicks and chops in the corner, then a cravat. Kane
flapjacks Jericho to the mat (as the announcers think Jericho landed
on his bad knee), then tosses Jericho out as we go to break.
Darn
it! We're not going to have mind games? There won't be any teasing
Heyman while Paul freaks out? C'mon, man! This just seems like
bullying by Cena. Blame Vince, right? I mean, at least Hogan waited
for Heenan to try something reprehensible before tossing him around.
Jericho/Kane, part two.
Jericho fights out of the chinlock, stopping a blind charge and
getting a missile dropkick. Kane tackles Jericho down for two. We
go to the VULCAN NERVE LOCK OF DOOM next, then switch to a chinlock
by Kane. Jericho fights out but gets smashed hard with a right, and
Kane follows with an avalanche and Bravo Side Slam for two. To the
top, but Jericho intercepts with a dropkick. Jericho with the
comeback, staggering Kane with a forearm. To the top, and a single
axhandle floors Kane. Jericho goes for ten punches in the corner,
but is caught on nine and dropped on the buckles face-first (in
theory). Kane removes a turnbuckle pad, but Jericho slides under the
bolt and catches Kane charging in. Diving bodypress gets two. Walls
of Jericho try, but Kane powers out. Tree slam by Kane as the bolt
is still exposed, and Kane tries to slingshot Jericho into it.
Jericho lands on the ropes, then counters a chokeslam try with a DDT
for two (sort of). Codebreaker is blocked, and a second try eats
boot as Kane gets two. Tombstone try, but Jericho slides out and
gets the one-handed bulldog. Lionsault lands right in Kane's grasp,
but the chokeslam misses. Jericho trips Kane into the bolt and rolls
him up for the pin at 13:05. That was... long. *1/2
Meanwhile,
Paul Heyman is begging Brock Lesnar to show up, but can't get
reception in John Cena's dressing room. 58 minutes to go.
Ugh.
Kane had no heat in that match, and Jericho was just another
midcarder. The crowd didn't turn on the match, but they weren't too
interested. Kane is done. Time to retire.
Back
on SmackDown, Mark Henry beat Rusev right-handed. Left-handed was a
no-contest when Lana threw powder and Rusev attacked. We get a pep
talk from a former US Olympian.
Renee
Young talks to Roman Reigns and reminds him about Seth Rollins
joining the Authority. Reigns talks about coming into the WWE with
brothers, but now stands alone. Rollins can't take credit for what
Reigns has done, but Reigns knows Rollins has a plan. So does
Reigns: punch Rollins into oblivion.
Steve Austin's podcast will be all-new tomorrow with guest Kevin
Nash.
Ooh,
Kevin Nash talking for an hour with Steve Austin? That could be a
lot of fun.
Jack Swagger v. Bo Dallas.
Wait, now? Well, it wasn't making Night of Champions anyway.
Dallas gets the opening salvo in the corner, but Swagger carries him
across the ring and adds kneelifts and a belly-to-belly for one.
Blind charge by Swagger misses, and Dallas adds corner clotheslines.
Short lariat by Dallas, and he attacks the ribs (which are no longer
taped). Dallas with a headlock as the crowd is more behind Dallas
than Swagger. Swagger fights out, but runs into a dropkick for one.
More chinlockery as the crowd is divded. Swagger with a snapmare,
but Dallas adds a forearm and works Swagger over in the corner.
Swagger tries to fight out, but a big boot by Dallas gets one, and
back to the chinlock. Swagger back suplexes out of it, but Dallas
recovers with a swinging neckbreaker for two. Dallas with knees to
the throat for two. Dallas to the top, imitating Swagger's pledge,
but the kneedrop misses. Swagger with the comeback, including a big
boot in the corner. WE THE PEOPLE! Dallas rolls away before the
Vaderbomb can get going, and a drape on the top rope into a cradle
gets two for Dallas. Blind charge catches Dallas's boot, but he
kicks out. Bo-Dog goes nowhere, but Dallas with a crucifix for two.
Immediate Patriot Lock by Swagger, and that's the tapout at 6:03 to
win the feud. WE THE PEOPLE! **
WWE
Network! 9.99! And tonight, Slam City! Tomorrow, Bret Hart's role
in the Monday Night Wars! Sunday, the pre-show and Night of
Champions!
Slam
of the Week is Jerry Springer getting the worst of it.
So
for those of you like me who were worried that Swagger's face turn
was just to be fed to Rusev, it looks like they're not willing to
give up on him yet. He needed the win more than Dallas, who can
recover heat just by being an annoying jackass on the microphone.
Paige and Nikki Bella v. Brie
Bella and AJ Lee.
Brie and Nikki start... just kidding, Brie and Paige start. Paige
with a superkick to Brie and she skips around. Knee smashes to
Brie's guy as she's hung up on the ropes, then a stomp and the
chinlock. She yanks Brie to the ground, but Brie is up with forearms
only to get floored. Headbutt by Paige gets two. Paige mocks AJ by
holding Brie's hand just out of reach (and blowing a kiss with it),
but Brie with a cradle for two. Paige floors Brie again and goes to
the chinlock again. Jawbreaker by Brie, but Nikki yanks AJ off the
apron and the guillotine DDT ends it at 2:58. This was what it had
to be. 1/2*
Nikki adds the Shock Treatment post-match to make a point, then
Paige skips around Brie... as does AJ on the outside, mirroring
Paige.
Back
to SmackDown, where Show/Henry/Jimmy/Jey faced
Harper/Rowan/Goldust/Stardust, with Big Show holding Bray at bay.
Bray
speaks of David and Goliath, saying sickness and death are our
Goliaths today. How will you topple your Goliath – He's not going
to help you. All your beliefs are lies, and Bray Wyatt has to fix
it. He'll start by fixing the Big Show.
Paul
Heyman. Still nervous. 23 minutes.
The
Divas' match went about the way it had to: you keep Brie/Nikki fresh,
you give nothing away for Sunday, Brie can eat the fall because she's
the underdog, and Paige is champ and needs some wins. It's too bad
they've done booking in such a way that makes all four people hard to
like. On a related note, why does Vince kowtow to people who don't
care about him?
Paul Heyman tries to butter up Great Khali and asks to get outside
for cell reception. “Do you know what John Cena will do to me?”
Khali breaks the phone (a clear prop) and throws Heyman back in. 18
minutes.
Big Show v. Bray Wyatt.
Bray goes to the kidneys, but to no effect as Show tosses him
around. Bray likes that. Bray gets bowled over again and sent to
the corner, but Bray fights out of the CHOP OF DOOM only to get boxed
down and chopped down. Blind charge misses for Show, but not for
Bray. Bray's second run intercepts the boot, torques the knee, and
leads to a clothesline. Bray kicks away and gets a DDT for two.
Headbutts and a chinlock follow. Show shoves out, but the charge
hits boot and Bray gets a clip and kick for one. Back to the
chinlock. This goes on for a while. Show suplexes out of it for a
Double KO. Show with corner clotheslines for the comeback, but Bray
cuts off the finale with a flying forearm for two. Bray up, but he's
caught and thrown into Rowan. Spinning elbow and the Family race in
for the DQ at 4:42. Not that it matters, because Harper and Rowan
both get chokeslammed at the same time as Bray watches from his
chair. I hate Big Show as a face. 1/4*
What
good does that do for anyone? Big Show is a tag team wrestler. He
doesn't need to beat up three guys. Harper and Rowan are jobbers
now, nothing more. And Bray? I don't know where you go with him.
We
look back at Goldust beating Jimmy Uso 2 weeks ago.
The Usos & Sheamus v. Cesaro
& Goldust & Stardust.
Looks like Paul Heyman's going to get an extension. Sheamus and
Goldust start. Lockup goes nowhere, round 2 goes to Goldust.
Sheamus likes it. Goldust works the arm, but Sheamus breaks out and
runs over Godust repeatedly. Brogue Kick is dodged as Goldust bails,
and he and Stardust have a conference (Cody: “Meow.”). Jey in,
working the arm, but Stardust tags himself in and slugs away, but Jey
with uppercuts as we're in overtime of the first half. Blind charge
eats Stardust's boots, and Cesaro is in. Six of Clubs to Jey (while
staring at Sheamus), and in comes Goldust with a right hand for one.
Blind charge misses, hot tag Jimmy. Superkick to Goldust and an
uppercut, then a Samoan throw. Stardust tags himself in and lands
the Disaster Kick (barely) for two. Jimmy is tossed as we go to
break.
If
it's not halftime yet, is this show going four hours? They can't
even do three right! At the very least, can we have a fourth
official like in soccer/football holding up how many minutes of
injury time we have for the first half of the show?
Usos/Sheamus//Cesaro/Dusts, part
two.
Cesaro gets two on Jimmy, twice, as we return. He kicks Jimmy
around, doing some Rocky Shuffle in between, but Jimmy gets into an
uppercut battle. GIANT SWING OF DOOM is teased, but Cesaro goes for
the Kevin Sullivan stomp for two. Karelin Suplex, and Stardust keeps
up the attack. The Dusts scratch away on Jimmy, and Goldust adds a
bottom rope choke. Jimmy looks to come back, but runs into a knee
for one. Stardust back as he punches Jimmy down and gets in his
face. Cesaro in with a running uppercut in the elbow as JBL wishes
Teddy Long a happy birthday. During a tag match. Seems right.
Jimmy headbutts away from Cesaro, but Cesaro gets a front chancery to
cut off the tag. Cesaro cuts off Jimmy and mocks Sheamus, then turns
around and gets backdropped. Goldust knocks Jey off the apron, but
Jimmy with the Dragon Whip. Hot tag Sheamus, and Stardust gets the
worst of it. Running knee into the corner and a Finlay Roll, and
Four of Clubs to Cesaro, but Stardust rolls him up for two. Stardust
and Cesaro are sent packing, and Sheamus dives onto both of them.
Stardust catches Sheamus coming back in, and Cesaro with a blind tag.
Brogue Kick to Stardust means nothing, but Neutralizer to Sheamus,
Jey saves. Jimmy tags in and superkicks Cesaro in the chaos, then
tags Jey in and dives onto Goldust. Superfly Splash ends Cesaro at
13:09. Good, hot finish. **3/4
We
look back at Dean Ambrose's injury.
Somebody
check the announcers. Do any of them wear watches? I can understand
if they don't and therefore have no idea how much time has passed...
but this is a rather transparent way of keeping people watching.
Just have Cena say “You have until the end of the show” if you're
going to do it this way.
On
the Night of Champions kick-off, Christian will interview Chris
Jericho.
A
look back at Mark Henry's Olympic career. Lana is not impressed.
Renee
Young is with Randy Orton as we look at his attack on Jericho last
week. What was your reason, Randy? Orton reminds us that Jericho
claims Orton was a charity case, but Orton says he's just a natural,
and he'll prove it at Night of Champions, when Jericho gets a beating
handed to him.
Great
Khali is still guarding the door.
I've
just been told Cena might have meant halftime of the NFL game. A
quick reluctant check of ESPN reveals we're more or less there. To
be fair, Cena didn't say “9:30”, he said “halftime”. That's
amazingly cheap.
Cena
arrives – yup, it was halftime of the NFL game – and tells Heyman
it's time to go. And he drags Heyman to the ring. Heyman begs for
mercy as Cena picks him up by the tie and asks for a microphone.
Ladies
and gentlemen, his name is John Cena and it's time for a fight. But
he's giving Heyman one last chance to get Lesnar to show up. Cena is
acting the bully to Heyman as he asks for Heyman to make Brock
appear.
Heyman
instead calls Cena a sham and says Cena is turning into the monster
Heyman wanted. He wanted Cena to take his aggression out on the
fans... but that's not the trigger. Heyman is. And he can make Cena
into a monster that can slay the monster Brock Lesnar. Heyman is
bringing Cena's anger and hatred out of him. He KNOWS Heyman won't
get hurt, because that would make Cena a bully. Will Cena REALLY
take it out on Heyman? No. Lesnar's a bully, but not Cena – and
that's why Cena can't beat Lesnar. Heyman knows Cena believes the
role model thing – so either let the aggression out and become the
Champ on Sunday – go over the cliff and hit Paul Heyman! Heyman is
egging Cena on to smack him, saying Lesnar took everything from Cena.
Heyman knows Cena is a good person, and that's why he will lose on
Sunday. He can't even hit Heyman, who clearly deserves it. Cena
will fail because of his nice guy streak.
Cena's
heard enough. He makes it clear: Heyman deserves to be destroyed,
because he is scum. (Heyman keeps begging to be hit, asking Cena to
become a Paul Heyman Guy.) Crowd wants it too – a huge YES chant
breaks out. But Cena says no. He can't. He thought Heyman would
produce Brock Lesnar so he could prove he was ready... but this was
all a con, just Heyman. And Heyman doesn't deserve to be hit.
Heyman
says Cena's doing the right thing – assuming she has testicles.
And that's more than enough, as Cena shoves Heyman right out of the
ring...
...and
FINALLY, here comes The Pain. Cena is READY. Lesnar is READY.
Brock slowly circles the ring as the announcers wonder why neither
man is starting the fight. Brock picks Heyman up and begins to walk
with him. Heyman goes to leave as Brock walks to the ring. Heyman
tries to call him back. And it works – Lesnar and Heyman walk
away. Cena calls Lesnar back. Lesnar jumps to the apron, and HERE
WE GO! And it's a German Suplex by Lesnar that flattens Cena.
Lesnar kicks Cena out of the ring, smirking as Heyman holds the belt
on high... but Cena's not done and knocks Lesnar out of the ring as
they brawl on the floor! Lesnar gets tossed into the barricade, and
the war is on on the floor. Cena's got the top mount and holds it
until 50 security guards hold Cena back. Crowd screams “Let Them
Fight”. Lesnar sees that Cena won't be chasing him and walks off.
Cena: “See you Sunday, bro!”
Now
THAT is how you sell a big show. The crowd was very much into it,
Lesnar looked strong from an even start, but Cena showed he wasn't
about to be manhandled and was going to fight smarter. Plus, it's
clear Cena *can* drop the nice guy act if pushed, and he's been
pushed. This is going to be good if they can deliver.
Cameron v. Naomi.
But first, we look at Total Divas to see why they've become enemies.
Cameron won't put the mirror away, so Naomi slaps it away and the
fight is on. Naomi takes advantage of that, getting whatever she
gets in the corner, but Cameron knocks her to the floor. Back in,
Cameron chokes Naomi in the ropes, then gets a suplex and split
legdrop to the back for two. Cameron with a hairpull slam for one,
and she gets a surfboard. Naomi butts out, but Cameron yanks her
down by the hair for one. Chinlock time, and the crowd no longer
cares. Back to the surfboard. Cameron tosses Naomi into the corner
and kicks her down, ignoring eating boot on a blind charge. Seated
dropkick gets two. Naomi fights out of another chinlock, and this
time, she gets a sunset flip try, completed into the Anaconda Vice
for the tapout at 4:26. DUD
Cameron
is worthless in the ring right now and needs that trip to NXT to get
her act together. I'm not going to give up on her yet, but there
wasn't much going on from Cameron there.
The Miz & Damien Sandow v.
Dolph Ziggler & R-Truth.
Humorously, the announcers act like Ziggler and Truth (Ziggler's
stunt double) look as alike as Miz and Sandow. Anyway, Sandow and
Dolph start. Headlock battle goes nowhere. Sandow with headbutts,
but Dolph gets a dropkick and elbow for one. Truth tagged in, and
stereo hiptosses lead to the two dancing in unison and dropping
elbows. Truth covers for two. Sandow attacks when Truth is chasing
Miz. Miz in, he smacks Truth around as the announcers act like no
one can tell anyone apart. Miz with a running kick for two, and
Sandow adds a shot in. Sandow gets an elbow for one, and he hits the
chinlock. Sandow does his own snapmare, running kick, and “AWESOME”
call, and in comes Miz for a camel clutch. Dolph and Miz argue, and
Miz gets a kick and chinlock. Truth suplexes out, hot tag Dolph.
Stinger Splash and Rude Awakening, but Miz cradles him for two.
Skull Crushing Finale is escaped, and Famouser gets two as Sandow
saves. Double-team by the Mizzes goes wrong, and Zig Zag ends it at
5:07. I have no idea anymore. *1/4
Tom
Philips interviews Seth Rollins as we look at the steel cage ambush.
Rollins promises the same fate awaits Roman Reigns tonight – yes,
he's naturally gifted, but Reigns is nothing without Rollins. Reigns
is just a barbarian and a Neanderthal. (Rollins even demonstrates
Reigns is a knuckle-walker.) Rollins then calls him part rhino and
part gorilla – meaning he's not smart. And brains will win out.
Tonight, Rollins takes away everything Reigns has ever had and
becomes the future of WWE.
Sorry,
the comedy kind of fell flat without having the match hinge on being
confused between the two. As it is, the announcers' banter didn't
help get the live crowd into it, but the crowd only cares about Dolph
at this point of those four anyway.
Your
SmackDown feature match will be Big Show and the Usos against the
entire Wyatt Family. Even though Show was just shown beating down
all three Wyatts 90 minutes ago.
Roman Reigns v. Seth Rollins.
Rollins gets shoved down early, but comes back with forearms before
bailing on a criss-cross. The chase continues, won by Rollins with a
throat drape. Reigns returns with a huge uppercut and he pounds
away. Huge hiptoss by Reigns and he takes over across the ring.
Short lariat, but Rollins escapes a Samoan drop and bails. Reigns
catches him and dumps him to the floor. Rollins visits the apron
spine-first, and back in, Rollins gets dumped over the top. Back
outside, Rollins eats stairs, then goes into the announcers table.
Then over it. Reigns stares at Rollins as we go to break.
Well,
I guess Mark Henry got cut due to time constraints. We needed
Cameron/Naomi and the stunt doubles.
Main event, part two.
During the break, Rollins got a spinning neckbreaker. Reigns on
live TV powers out of a chinlock, getting a suplex on Rollins.
Running clothesline in the corner and an uppercut follow, but the
Drive-By Dropkick is telegraphed. Rollins kicks Reigns aside and
dives onto him. Back in, it gets two. Rollins gets mounted punches
and lords over Reigns. Running Stinger Splash misses as Reigns gets
clothesline after clothesline, but after a series of misses, Reigns
with the Protoslam for two. Drive-By Dropkick connects for real this
time, and back in, it's the Superpunch. Rollins vaults the spear and
gets a low superkick for two. To the top goes Rollins, but Reigns
uppercuts him and climbs after him. Rollins teases a Tiger Driver,
but Reigns teases a Samoan Superdrop, and it ends with Rollins
getting the turnbuckle bomb for two. Rollins taunts Reigns, who
headbutts Rollins to shut him up. Massive strikefest breaks out,
Rollins misses the Curbstomp, and Spear gets it at 11:23. **1/4
Cole says they'll meet again on Sunday for some reason.
We
look back at the arm wrestling. Wait, they're doing that? Well, it
is only 10:54. Wait, it's the main event??
I,
uh... what? This is the last segment? We're going home with this?
Did Vince just throw the script pages in the air and pick them up in
a random order and no one had the heart to tell him they were
shuffled?
Slam
City ad.
We
look back at Cena and Brock going to war, leading to a Night of
Champions plug.
Miniature
American flags for all! Michael Cole introduces Mark Henry. This
gets a USA chant. Cole asks: does Rusev's disdain affect him? Henry
is angry at Rusev. He is upset that he had to leave the Atlanta
Games due to injury. (Crowd is WHATing Henry.) But he has a second
chance. On Sunday, he'll shut up Rusev and Lana. And if you love
America and wave them flags, Henry promises he won't – can't –
let them down. Cole then asks about Lana's disparaging of America on
social media, calling America hypocritical and a losing cause. Henry
says that Russia doesn't have the freedom of speech America does...
...and
finally, here's Rusev. Lana demands silence, but Henry says “make
me”. Lana calls what Henry says mere propaganda and that Russia
subscribes to the facts. Since America's intelligence is going
downhill fast, here's an educational slideshow to make their point.
See, Henry also competed in 1992, right? Did you not mention it
because you failed? And that a Russian won the gold? And here's a
picture of the man who did it. And that superiority is why Henry
“withdrew”. Henry knew he was inferior – you know, like Obama
is inferior to Putin. And on Sunday, history repeats itself.
Henry,
though, pledges to everyone in Lafayette (cheap pop) and all other
Americans... but instead, he recites the Pledge of Allegiance... or
starts to when Rusev invades the ring. Rusev wins that slugfest and
works him over in the corner, but he runs into a flying toss from
Henry. Rusev's up fast with a superkick, though, and it's Crush
time. Camel clutch is on... wait, no, he can't quite hook it. Henry
blocks it, gets to his feet, and tree bombs Rusev. Rusev is disposed
over the top rope and Murica! Henry waves the flag as the show ends.
MORK
CALLING ORSON – COME IN ORSON:
This
show felt so disjointed. If you switch Henry/Rusev's segment with
Cena/Lesnar's, I'm okay with it, oddly enough. I mean, it's still a
nothing Raw either way, mind you, but at least it feels like it flows
better.
As
it is, there was way too much filler on this show. Cameron and Naomi
went nowhere and did nothing, and it's time that could've gone to
Swagger/Dallas or the six-man. The need to wait for NFL halftime
makes WWE seem second-rate. It should've been the halftime of Raw,
in my opinion.
Maybe
I'm just jaded now. Anyway:
HOW
I'D BOOK IT:
- Dolph Ziggler defeats the Miz to remain Intercontinental Champion.
- Rusev makes Mark Henry tap out.
- Nikki Bella defeats AJ Lee and Paige by pinning Paige to become Divas' Champion.
- Cesaro defeats Sheamus to win the US Title.
- Randy Orton defeats Chris Jericho and puts him out of action.
- Goldust and Stardust defeat the Usos to win the Tag Team Titles.
- Seth Rollins beats Roman Reigns and puts him on the shelf.
- John Cena and Brock Lesnar goes to a Double DQ, necessitating Hell in a Cell.
STATS:
MATCH
TIME: 60:33 over nine matches
BEST
MATCH: The six-man
WORST
MATCH: Cameron/Naomi
NIGHT
MVP: John Cena and Brock Lesnar (even though it's kayfabe)
SCORE:
3.5. Just a lot of boring, plus they made Raw look second-rate,
which was beyond stupid. And yet, I'm still going to watch Night of
Champions because Cena and Lesnar have dragged that show kicking and
screaming into an interesting night.
Matt
Perri is here tomorrow. Tommy Hall does the rest of the week. Brian
Bayless will be back with the e-fed Night of Champions. Scott Keith
keeps the mailbag open. And now, the floor will be turned over to
you – I have Takeover II to watch.
Nanu,
nanu.
*Cornette Face*
ReplyDeleteFuck this company.
*goes back to watching Nitro on the Network*
They did nothing to make me want to watch NoC. Do they really expect to GAIN viewers?
ReplyDeleteThey're just going by that famous old adage: Why drink the milk when you can buy the cow for $9.99?
ReplyDeleteSo you could...
ReplyDelete1) not run a match and do some kind of angle to get heat for the match
2)run the match but have some kind of crazy non finish
3)run the match but put the heel over in some kind of screwy way
But they
4)run the match and put the face over clean
It kinda ruined everything Seth and Dean were doing in the summer.
ReplyDeleteWhy the hell would they close the go home show with that Henry/Rusev crap?
ReplyDeleteI half expected Henry to get his ass kicked and have Kurt Angle come out and make the save.
So from the looks of things, the problem with Raw is Vince and all his yes men like Dunn, because everyone seems to agree that NXT is the best show WWE puts on, because it's supposedly all Triple H and none of Vince and Dunn.
ReplyDeleteWhat the fuck are they even thinking anymore?
ReplyDeleteIt's been said before by many who worked there...Vince thrives on competition, and he has none now. He needs to be the underdog, the fighter, and now his company is a bloated dinosaur that just sits around eating it's own tail over and over again. The empire has grown too big and we've been watching the slow sad collapse for over 12 years now. Vince should have been careful what he wished for.
ReplyDeleteSounds like I missed a classic :(
ReplyDeleteHey I still want to see the match. That's for sure. But I mean gimmie a break, they really do a finish to that match on the raw before the ppv? That's weak especially if you have the network
ReplyDeleteThey were using old Monday Night War tactics and used the Cena/Lesnar segment during halftime. This would be the only time in the 25 years I've watched wrestling that I'm curious about the ratings breakdown.
ReplyDeleteIt's not uncommon, Apple just released a Note.
ReplyDeleteMy guess is rematch on smackdown with Rollins winning
ReplyDeleteLike, we kinda wanna see the match in the sense that its a Seth Rollins PPV match and we already have the network. But as far as actual wrestling booking goes, yeah, jesus christ this is nuts. So their sales pitch is "See the clean finish on TV, and pay for the screwjob! Or pay to see the same finish again!" Vince really must be losing it at this point.
ReplyDeleteHe's also become a crazy out of touch old man. I don't think competition would up his game, I just don't think he has it anymore.
ReplyDeleteI would hate it even if it was some mid card crap feud where they do this all the time. But with your only hot non Lesnar acts, that's stupid. People want to see that match. People want to see some crazy build for it and hot promos and pull apart brawls. Like in a way you could say they're giving people what they want but wow what a lazy and terrible way to do it.
ReplyDeleteYeah. The older you get, the more set in your ways you get. 1997 Vince was able to have that fabled meeting where they got everyone together and he admitted that times had changed and he was out of touch...but 2014 Vince won't change a single thing until he is either dead or incapacitated.
ReplyDeleteThe match was good for a raw match. Probably ***. But man I just hated it
ReplyDeleteA realistic solution to some of this would be getting Vince to just be the #1 announcers again.
ReplyDeleteWell as a viewer we want these stories to build up and feel epic and important, and then you watch the shows and it becomes obvious they're booking on a napkin and kinda don't give a shit about their own product.
ReplyDeleteThey need to find shit for Reigns to do from now until Mania, and instead of building a big feud where he actually has to overcome some obstacles... he fucking beats the gel clean on Raw before they even have a PPV match. Yet what, Reigns vs Rollins is gonna go 3 months?
Wow this shit is terrible.
That's a good guess, but still, what a horseshit build to a novel PPV match.
ReplyDelete#LOLROMANWINS
ReplyDeleteVince is stuck in a different decade and nobody wants to lose their job by pointing this out, thus we get nonsensical....everything.
ReplyDeleteThey blew off The Shield feud on Raw 6 days before the PPV. HAHAHAHHAHA
ReplyDeleteThe whole card is crap. It's a three-hour Raw with a different backdrop and either a $55 or $9.99 price tag.
ReplyDeleteAnd this is the one thing they've booked almost perfectly
ReplyDeleteI think anyone probably would get it based on Cena vs Lesnar alone but two shield guys wrestling is a big deal on a ppv
ReplyDeleteYup, it's been the one piece of coherent booking since Bryan got hurt. But I guess Rollins forgot to shake someone's hand this morning, or Vince got worried that Roman Reigns didn't look strong enough?
ReplyDeleteAlso why is Sheamus still on fucking television?
I said it in the live thread, but it's hilariously ironic that WWE is making the same mistakes that they constantly bash WCW and themselves for in the 1990s.
ReplyDeleteAlso I really don't get how you can blame this type of shit on the amount of TV time they have to fill. I could think of 100 things they could have done instead of that.
ReplyDeleteI've completely stopped watching the current product even though one of my favs is the current WWE Champ. The way they book now makes me not want to invest any time in following any feuds or rooting for anyone as it becomes 50/50 booking and guys are at a standstill.
ReplyDeleteThis is why I watch WCW Nitros and old ppvs among other old stuff on the network. Because they made me care what I'm seeing on my TV by their booking. Now all heels are cowards and it's CENA, CENA, CENA and everyone else is booked as an afterthought.
..................*goes back to Nitro*
The more I think about it, the more I realize that the entire company is just messed up. Their on-air product is stale, repetitive, and often nonsensical (as tonight demonstrated). And they don't know how to promote the Network. For everything WWE does right (Lesnar beating Cena), they do 10 things wrong.
ReplyDeleteThe amount of TV time they have to fill every week is certainly a huge problem--- leads to things like having to sit through 400 variations of Goldust vs The Usos before we even get to a PPV--- but yeah, that's no excuse for blowing off your best feud in an anti-climatic TV match a week before a PPV.
ReplyDeleteI guess it means Rollins goes over Sunday? Though fuck it, no way. Reigns just pins him clean again.
I think Reigns will totally go over because Rollins has the briefcase and Vince has shown he thinks he can job those guys and they keep their heat. Also then Ambrose will be back and that feud will continue.
ReplyDeleteI really hope Austin's podcast tomorrow is just him and Nash bashing tonight's episode of Raw.
ReplyDeleteSo instead of building to a moment where Reigns is in trouble and needs help, they're building to a moment where Reigns easily beats up the helpless heel... and Ambrose then runs in and punches him again.
ReplyDeleteHave these guys ever watched a fucking movie or heard what a story is? It's nuts.
It's crazy how LOADED the roster is right now vs how bad the shows are.
ReplyDeleteEven with Bryan out and no Punk, there's Ambrose/Rollins/Reigns/Bray/Cena/Lesnar/Jericho/Cesaro/Sheamus/Ziggler/Harper plus Miz is killing it with his character, plus Sandow, Bo Dallas is really good on the mic, Rusev & Lana, Paige and AJ, The Usos, Cody, Goldust.
Oh, and Orton is there, so that's a shame. Nevertheless amazing roster.
Yet the booking around the roster is just insanely bad. You have eras where WWE was creating entertaining TV around loads of 1980s stiffs or late 90s marginal talents like the New Age Outlaws and The Godfather, but now they're putting out terrible shows with this roster. What a shame.
Yeah, the three hours is a huge problem. They just aren't creative enough to fill that time constructively. In defense of the company, though, it's almost impossible to do that. All of these repetitive matches, finishes and feuds are just one long, endless loop of nothingness.
ReplyDelete