On Monday night, with the
bulk of WCW’s main roster in Japan, the nWo completely took over Nitro for the
second hour of the show. We were treated to nonsense matches, and complete and
utter chaos. We also got the debut of Vincent, the first addition who was
really looking like overkill. TheCubsFan
weighs in more:
If I'm remember the WONs correctly, there was
starting to be some pressure from Turner for WCW to spin off another show on
TBS, with a working idea of it being an nWo show. The people in charge in WCW
felt it would over expose the product and fought to delay/stop it from
happening for the time being. It's possible these additions were justified so
there'd be enough bodies for a nWo focused show (and, given the thinking of the
people involved, to bring aboard people who could do jobs of the people at the
top wouldn't be asked), but it changed how the nWo felt from here on out.
We’ll see if the trend
continues on a condensed 90 minute version of WCW Saturday Night.
TONY SCHIAVONE and DUSTY RHODES are
refusing to air the nWo footage from Monday, so as not to stoop to their level.
Instead, they want to focus on the new tag-team champions, Public Enemy. How
about we don’t?
Nope, they’re gonna force
it. We follow THE PUBLIC ENEMY back
to New York, where they do a kick line (start spreading the news!), and dance
in a fountain just like some other pop culture show.
HIGH VOLTAGE vs. THE PUBLIC ENEMY (for the WCW
world tag-team titles)
How did THESE idiots earn
a shot at the belts? They faced the Outsiders on Nitro (who have a title shot
at Havoc) – and didn’t get in a single offensive move. And true to form, Voltage
takes a double neckbreaker off the bell, while MARK CURTIS cringes. Rage hits Rock with a backdrop suplex, but
Grunge saves. Voltage works the double team, and a clothesline gets 2. Grunge
gets an early hot tag, and clotheslines both guys. Voltage comes back with a
double clothesline, but miscommunication gives Grunge the chance to roll up
Rage for the win at 3:02.
Post-match, Kaos takes a swanton through a table. *
DEAN MALENKO vs. BRAD ARMSTRONG
Tony laughingly calls
Armstrong one of WCW’s “top stars”, but he IS coming off a win against Super
Calo so maybe momentum is changing (no). NICK
PATRICK is the referee, and Malenko IS wearing black trucks with white
writing, hmmmm. Dusty starts running through fantasy scenarios, such as hoping
that Dean Malenko catches Number Six out back and tears him limb from limb.
Considering he’s having a bit of a difficult time with Armstrong so far, I’m
not sure I love this idea. Armstrong gives Malenko a faceplant, and a running
kneelift to the “belleh welleh” gets 2. Malenko dumps Brad to the floor to give
himself a moment to breathe. Armstrong tries to sunset flip back in, but
Malenko grabs the ropes. Patrick pushes Dean off, but the momentum carries him
forward into a pin, and Malenko scores the win with an assist from Patrick at 3:10. The plot thickens. *
REY MYSTERIO JR. meets with TONY SCHIAVONE
to discuss Malenko. Rey has nothing but respect for Dean, he’s the toughest opponent
he’s ever faced, and he can’t wait to have another great match at Halloween
Havoc. He promises to keep his belt for a very long time. Malenko walks in now,
and gives Rey his due as champion. But, he’s going to get his belt back. He
offers a handshake, which Rey happily accepts, and Dean gives him a short
clothesline, beats him up, and rips off the mask. Schiavone throws his coat
over Rey’s head, and tells the camera to beat it.
MAXX vs. EDDIE GUERRERO
This is Eddie’s first
match since the Clash of Champions in August. Eddie hits a dropkick and
finishes with the Frog Splash at 0:28.
Tony figures that was a message to DDP that their issues aren’t over.
KONNAN vs. THE GAMBLER
Fully initiated in the
Dungeon of Doom, Konnan is given all his n’s back. The Gambler is dressed to
the 9’s tonight, wearing a very classy top hat, and puffy shirt. This looks
like a man who’s ready to take matters seriously, and finally win a match. In
fact, he nearly scores an upset in a choke hold, but the referee won’t count
once he spies the choke. Konnan comes back with a standing headlock/figure four
combo, and upon release hits a powerbomb. Tequila Sunrise makes its debut and gets
the win at 1:56. Damn it all. 1/2*
THE FOLLOWING ANNOUNCEMENT HAS BEEN PAID FOR BY
THE NEW WORLD ORDER
The nWo members are all
bowing down to and chanting for Hogan. DiBiase wants to take over the world
next. Hogan continues to make fun of Macho’s bald head, while Hall tells him to
“snap out of it”. Hogan starts doing a dead-on Macho impression, “Hollywood
Hogan is going to kick my ass in Vegas, oooooh yeah.”
ROUGH & READY vs. CHRIS JERICHO and “JUICED” JIM
POWERS (with Teddy Long)
Dusty feels that Rough &
Ready are close to being world tag-team champions. Bo Beverly? I’m not okay with
this. Speaking of Not Okay With This, the Jericho/Powers teaming is a visual I
really could have done without. NICK
PATRICK referees, and hopefully he’ll just send Jericho and Powers to the
back, telling them “yeah, this combo? I don’t think so.” Dirty Dick pounds on
Jericho, but Chris comes back with a monkey flip and scoop slam. Slater comes
back with a running clothesline, and Enos takes Jericho to the floor. Enos
beats on him a bit before rolling him back in. Enos misses a big splash and
tags in Powers, and he’s promptly pinned with a backslide via the feet on the
ropes at 3:10. Dusty thinks Patrick
saw Enos using the ropes, and gets super irate. Long gets all up in Patrick’s
grill, but he has no interest in having his authority questioned. Match of the
night at *1/2.
Backstage, TONY SCHIAVONE gets a word with Nick
Patrick. Patrick says no one’s feet were on the ropes, because if they had
been, he would have seen it. Patrick says that if anyone’s responsible for the
nWo advantage, perhaps he can look in the mirror because at War Games, what
threw WCW off was the bogus Sting. And who spread the rumor about Sting joining
the nWo? Tony Schiavone, more than anyone else. He’s also offended by Dusty
Rhodes calling him nWo, he’s the most loyal WCW official there is. In fact, he
proved it Monday by being the only person who had the guts to stay and referee
during the nWo carnage. “As long as I’m here, WCW, you have nothing to worry
about.”
DISCO INFERNO vs. CHAVO GUERRERO JR.
Disco stops worrying
about his hair long enough to show a little fire, attacking Chavo off the bell.
A swinging neckbreaker delights Disco, who stops to dance. Damnit Disco, focus!
His constant dancing between moves proves to be his downfall, however, as Chavo
hits a monkey flip and holds on for the pin at 1:21. DUD
THE FACES OF FEAR (with Jimmy Hart) vs. THE
ARMSTRONG BROTHERS
Now this is something I
can sink my teeth into. Scott proudly declares the Armstrongs back in the house
in WCW, which might be the last thing he EVER says if things go my way. They
hit a double dropkick on Barbarian, and then deliver one to Meng as well. A
double shoulderblock stuns Meng for a half second, but he comes back by no
selling a sunset flip and stomping on Steve’s face. Barbarian lays in the
chops, and fires off a big boot for 2. Meng comes off the top with a splash
after a vertical suplex, and the Faces win at 1:33. I had so much more for more. *
TONY SCHIAVONE greets the winners backstage. Hart says the Dungeon loves Halloween,
and can’t wait to get their hands on the Horsemen. Meng and Barbarian
hilariously take over the microphone now, screaming gibberish, with the
occasional “HALLOWEEN HAVOC” and “LAS VEGAS” thrown in. Barbarian turns to
English at the end. “STEVE MICHAEL WE SHOW YOU WHAT WRESTLE IS!”
LEX LUGER vs. JUVENTUD GUERRERA
It didn’t take long for
us to move into the era of using the Mexican Cruiserweights as jobbers. I’m
disappointed in you, WCW. I hold hope that Juvi is going to score an upset, but
he’s locked in a Rack at 1:06.
Trash.
Once again, TONY SCHIAVONE works the backstage
area. Lex says if the Horsemen want to point fingers at him for losing to the
nWo, then so be it. He vows not just to defeat Arn Anderson, but to hurt him.
Where Sting is concerned, everyone was fooled by the bogus nWo Sting. He’s
apologized repeatedly, and now he’s going to give Sting a little space to work
his problems out.
BIG BUBBER vs. RANDY SAVAGE
Main event time, but we’ve
only got a couple of minutes left at most. Thankfully, Savage recognizes we’re
short on time, and runs Bubba face first to the ringsteps. Back in, a double
axehandle drops Bubba, and Savage starts dropping elbow after elbow. ELIZABETH looks on in concern. NICK PATRICK hits the ring, and takes a
punch between the eyes. CHRIS JERICHO
and CHAVO GUERRERO JR. rush down to
stop the insanity, but Savage grabs Patrick by the hair and tears off through
the crowd, as the copyright logo comes off and the show fades to black.
Will Patrick live to see Nitro? Will Lex Luger ever find love again? Will the Mexican imports win another match?
Hell if I know, Worldwide
is next and they don’t care about any of that.
Finally picked up a Chromecast today. Looking forward to a night with Bojack Horseman. Should be good stuff.
ReplyDeleteCount me as someone who didn't like her then and doesn't like her now. I've gone on this rant before so I will stop here.
ReplyDeleteTigers lose again. YES!
ReplyDeleteI meant the real football. Everton all the way!
ReplyDeleteThat's a fun exercise, how do you make the announce team worse? The only rule is that you keep Michael Cole. I'll on with replacing Lawler and add to that swapping out Bradshaw for Mongo. There's still two former wrestlers at the table, even!
ReplyDeleteRed Rose? It's part-TEA time, all the time!! Add a drop of LEMON.
ReplyDeleteEvery review is opinionated. That's why it's a review.
ReplyDeleteBruce Mitchell is a hillbilly and a dumbass.
ReplyDeleteWhat are the feuds?
ReplyDeleteAnd just as awkward and forced as the "molester of boys" crap. No more catchphrases!!!!
ReplyDeleteUnlike your fiancee.
ReplyDelete1. I like this face - face rivalry. Just imagine if Cena and Ambrose put on a 20-minute match that really showcases both, with Ambrose winning on pure hate of Rollins. JK there will be shenanigans.
ReplyDeleteBaseball - the most random as hell sport.
ReplyDeleteThe real question: Did Verlander keep his phone safe ... ?
ReplyDeleteI've been to Wrestlemania, so Super Bowl. Partially for Adam's reason (resale), partially for the "If the Saints make it, I'd be there" aspect. I know the experience would probably be "Meh", but I could live with it.
ReplyDeleteWhy would you defend him? (Not Vince, but the Molester of Boys)
ReplyDeleteTrish and Lita got over because they were allowed to show off their tits and thongs. Then they actually worked hard to improve their characters and wrestling.
ReplyDeleteThat's why most divas got over initially. Hotness. Some then work hard and improve enough to stay over, some fade when someone hotter comes along.
TJ Michael Hayes is all over the Twitter machine with some single asking why the kids can't pray in school. I'd point him to several Supreme Court decisions that state kids CAN pray in school, but that school officials cannot LEAD prayer. I love crusades against nothing, though.
ReplyDeleteTrivia: Verlander calls his girlfriend the JUGS machine.
ReplyDeleteCole, Bischoff, Randy Rosenbloom.
ReplyDeleteIsn't your logo from the St. Louis Browns?
ReplyDeleteNot so much defending him as expressing my hatred of the catchphrase. Edwards annoys everybody but the catchphrase is just retarded sounding. I find it more obnoxious than I find Edwards.
ReplyDeleteMania, with the exception of Armageddon the Browns making it. Mania just looks like a more fun week.
ReplyDeleteThat it is. Best way to rep the St Louis area without actually being a Cards fan.
ReplyDeleteI thought that was Milli Van...God Damnit!
ReplyDeleteI think it's an annoying thing to see written over and over, and it's not like the person you're writing it towards gives a shit. It's a message board, you don't know eachother in real life, he's not feeling insulted. What's the point? It's just a douchechillz-enducing thing to see used over and over.
ReplyDeleteWould be MY take on it. ;)
I bet his autobiography will be titled "Michael Hayes: Blacker Than You".
ReplyDeleteUntil his heel turn in 2009, Punk wasn't really killing it in the ring or on the mic, and while he was certainly over, he wasn't blowing the roof off of arenas either. He got a pretty good push and decent angles (again, like I said, especially as a newcomer to the company) and was pretty over. He wasn't, however, turning chicken shit into chicken salad. Nothing he did in his first four-ish years in the company was particularly memorable (in relation to the quality of his angles, and in general as well) IMO.
ReplyDeleteAnd putting anyone in a shit program is a disservice to them. How many shit angles has Cena been in, yet no one bemoans his situation. And out of interest, other than the stuff with Ryback and Axel, which of Punk's programs post-pipebomb do you think sucked?
I recall he jobbed 100% clean to Undertaker in 2000 which was dumb because Taker was the last guy who needed that win.
ReplyDeleteI count Jericho at the 2002 Rumble because there was no outside interference, it was just him cheating on his own devices to win.
As far as clean jobs go, I doubt you'll find a whole lot from 1999-2002 but you'll probably find more clean jobs than Hogan or Austin did. Cena has probably done more clean jobs than Rock but Rock's run was from 1999-2002 while Cena has from 2005-now. That's not to take away from Cena because he's done his fair share of jobs.
But as I said, there are ways to put someone over huge without losing the match. Triple H put Jericho over HUGE in their Last Man Standing match. Cena put Cesaro over HUGE in their RAW match from this year.
SON OF A BITCH, I totally forgot about something I wanted to write this week and now I have no idea where my notes on it are.
ReplyDeleteGIMME THE NUMBER, GIMME THE NUMBER
ReplyDeleteYou can cheer on the Orioles. They used to be the St. Louis Browns!
ReplyDeleteTo be fair, it'd be a natural progression and not particularly jarring. Ambrose is supposed to be the big anti-corporate rebel guy. HHH is the face of the corporate side of the WWE.
ReplyDeleteSee I don't even mind the overall idea. I think that heel announcers should occasionally cheer for a babyface when the heel is just too obnoxious or foreign like how JBL still cheers against Rusev. Or that it can go the other way occasionally, a guy who's normally a face announcer should have a favorite guy who's a heel.
ReplyDeleteThey just took it way too far with Cole's character. I realize that wrestling isn't where you should go when you look for subtlety in storytelling but they could have booked Cole's heel turn and overall "Jim Gray on roids" character 100 different ways and 99 of them would have been better than what we got.
WrestleMania. I know with WrestleMania there will be 2-3 matches I really care about and other wrestlers I enjoy. With the Super Bowl unless the Raiders complete the most miraculous of all turn arounds within the next decade, I won't have a big rooting interest.
ReplyDeleteWrestleMania. Guaranteed to have a better time
ReplyDeleteAt participating retailers, you get a free copy if you moonwalk to the register with it
ReplyDeleteHe was Chris Jericho before that loss: a guy who's sometimes in the main event, and sometimes in the midcard. After beating Cena, he was treated like a main eventer permanently. Even when he lost those PPV matches to Orton, he was protected and booked as being the better man who was screwed over.
ReplyDeleteWM 2 for you, it is!
ReplyDeleteVince vs WWF1987 vs Worst in the World, with John Edwards and Stan Ford thrown in
ReplyDeleteWhat if it was really good pizza?
ReplyDeleteTruly a main event in any thread on the BoD
ReplyDeletePunk himself has said he prefers playing a heel the way guys like HHH, Orton and Jericho do. He certainly seemed a lot happier playing the top heel than he did as the #2 face.
ReplyDeleteI still think both Brock/Cena & Rollins/Ambrose feuds were set up perfectly for Hell in a Cell.
ReplyDeleteAn Ambrose/Cena feud could be compelling though. Cena & Ambrose could just go at it for 25 minutes with the winner being too worn down and Rollins outlasts them to win in the main event.
I'd go Ambrose/Cena with Orton costing Ambrose the match at the behest of the Authority to keep Ambrose away from Rollins. Orton/Ambrose starts right away in the cell and Ambrose beats Orton.
In the main event, Rollins and Cena are having their match when Ambrose decides to wreck everything and brings some bolt cutters or maybe some kind of giant vehicle to tear the door off the cell and gets his hands on Rollins. The authority runs down and the show ends in chaos. No one likes to see a show end in a damn "fuck finish" but it's $9.99 on the Network and if you buy it on PPV you're an idiot.
1) Those Today Show bitches better get drunk, they have no entertainment value if they aren't sloppy loaded
ReplyDelete2) I paid for some advice this morning and the advice was basically, "Shut the fuck up."
So The Fappening continues...this time with NICK HOGAN.
ReplyDeleteShe is a women's JTTS. The role suits her.
ReplyDeleteIf anything it's WWF1987 vs. Kyle Fitta.
ReplyDeleteTHAT'S NOT WHAT WE MEANT WHEN WE SAID WE WANTED MORE LEAKED PIX!!!
ReplyDeleteOH, THE HUMANITY
I'd go with your scenario above except that in the chaos, Rollins steals a win against Cena to end the show.
ReplyDeleteI think the hacker has gone too far now.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to keep them all straight. It's like Russo is booking
ReplyDeleteYeah I mean, she is what she is. As far as heel/face dynamics I think she'd make a better heel just cause she's so damn annoying, but it's not really like WWE is consistent with faces and heels nowadays anyway.
ReplyDeleteYeah that could work too. Then Cena could be pissed at Ambrose and blame him for costing him the win and add some shine to their feud too. Ambrose/Cena/Rollins three way feud could have interesting dynamics. Could even headline Survivor Series in a Triple threat or they could go with Team Cena/Ambrose vs. The Authority in a Survivor Series tag and give it 40 minutes.
ReplyDeleteIf John Cena had to choose b/w his tiny towels and Nikki Bella, which would he choose?
ReplyDeleteHHH and Cena, sure. Orton's been booked weakly and/or as irrelevant for quite some time now.
ReplyDeleteGood for Ambrose, after a feud with Cena he'll finally be a lifetime midcarder.
ReplyDeleteYUP, Team Cena/Ambrose vs Team Authority is exactly how they should book Survivor Series.
ReplyDeleteRollins keeps trying to exploit the Cena/Ambrose animosity--- which allowed Rollins to win at HiaC--- but in the end Cena and Ambrose win the Survivor Series match. Or hell, maybe they don't.
Then you move on to an Ambrose/Rollins or Ambrose/Cena/Rollins ladder match at TLC for Rollins' briefcase.
Yup, just like CM Punk and Daniel Bryan!
ReplyDeleteWWF1987 did a heel turn on TNA last week, seemingly ending that program.
ReplyDeleteDoes Nikki pay the bills?
ReplyDeleteThe guy that never felt like he got a push and the guy that seems to be happy just getting to exist, not the best examples really.
ReplyDeleteWell, if Total Divas has taught me anything, she actually commits to loaning John's money out without his approval
ReplyDeleteI think the Network could actually give them the gumption to book a main event Survivor Series tag or at least take risks in the matches they do book. Plus, a 40+ minute Survivor Series tag booked right with the talent available could be downright amazing. At this point it's all just conjecture but that could be a direction they could go if they are content to let the Ambrose/Rollins situation ride out while adding Cena to the mix. It would basically become their defacto top program while Lesnar is away with the strap.
ReplyDeleteNattie is non-descriptive and sucks in either role so it doesn't matter what role she plays.
ReplyDelete??? They're two guys who became legit main eventers after going over John cena. They're pretty great examples, actually.
ReplyDelete"The guy that never felt like he got a push and the guy that seems to be happy just getting to exist," That kinda has nothing to do with anything.
I know I'm late to this argument, but did Bryan really feud with Cena? They had one match at Summerslam, with Cena disappearing until returning to take the title off Del Rio.
ReplyDeleteNHL fantasy league
ReplyDeleteDaniel Bryan is still a baffling case of becoming mega-over. I knew he had the talent to succeed but how it all happened still is crazy to me. He lost his World Title in 18 seconds at the biggest show of the year and became the most over guy on the roster for it. It's nuts.
ReplyDeleteHe didn't feud with Cena, you are correct.
ReplyDeleteThey worked together for two weeks
I haven't watched a ton of that show, but that was awesome. "John will loan you the money and wouldn't charge you interest. You could pay him back at $2K/month..."
ReplyDeleteIs there a time limit on how long they have to interact for it to be considered a feud? I mean, I guess it was a "program" not a "feud" since they both stayed face and didn't hate eachother. But the match was announced the day after MITB and they worked a program til Summerslam. That's not a thing?
ReplyDeleteMaybe he realized that Miz is fucking terrible...
ReplyDeleteThat's how good Paul Heyman was at directing Cole and Tazz.
ReplyDeleteIt ain't coincidence!-Alfred Yankovic
ReplyDeleteSorry, only we get to use continuity.
ReplyDeletePaul and Stephanie.
What are three men you wish you were when you touch yourself at night because no one else will.
ReplyDeleteI don't care because Sandow is awesome.
ReplyDeleteunfortunately, that's a great description of myself: birthdates, phones numbers etc. of friends - nope. knowing who played guitar in that "obscure" New York punk band in the eighties - of course I know that!
ReplyDeletethe German Raw announce team does a good job at this at the moment. both are usually face commentators but they have also certain favorites that are heels - or just argue that the heels have a point in certain angles.
ReplyDeleteI'd say JR was a bigger bitch though. They openly mocked him and his illness several times on TV, and he continued to sit there announcing for them.
ReplyDeleteThe only reason Cole doesn't cheer for MIz (and other heels) is completely because Jerry Lawler had a heart attack. Also, JBL is on commentary now to act as Vince's surrogate on commentary.
ReplyDeleteSame. Heel Cole still announcing most matches was one of the worst ideas ever.
ReplyDeleteHe knew it all along, he had to write this song.
ReplyDelete