The preshow starts tomight at 7pm EST on the Network with two members of the new day going up against Goldust & Stardust. Other matches include
John Cena vs.Seth Rollins in a Tables Match with the stipulations of Cena losing his title shot if he does not win this match
Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt in a TLC Match
Dolph Ziggler vs. Luke Harper for the Intercontinental Title in a Ladder Match
Ryback vs. Kane in a Ladder Match
Erick Rowan vs. Big Show in a Stairs Match
Jack Swagger vs. Rusev for the U.S. Title
The Usos vs. Miz & Damien Mizdow for the Tag Team Titles
Nikki Bella vs. AJ Lee for the Diva's Title
Dolph Ziggler vs. Luke Harper for the IC Title in a Ladder Match
Ziggler won the title after taking Harper off of a ladder then climbing up to reach the belt. Brutal match with all sorts of crazy bumps. The first half was slow and seemed nothing more than a collection of crazy bumps with Ziggler overselling like crazy but this got a lot better as it went along. both guys bled and their bodies were covered in welts. This match did more for the IC Title than anything else has over the past few years (16:40) ***1/2.
The Usos vs. Miz & Damien Mizdow for the Tag Team Titles
They showed the clip from the preshow of Miz talking to Naomi. Dull match. The crowd was digging Mizdow but a lot of this was restholds. The Usos dominated early until Miz hit Jey with a DDT. After that the match went to a really slow pace. Miz shoved Sandow in the way of a dive then hit one of the Uso's with a belt to lose by DQ but keep the titles (7:17) *1/2.
Seth Rollins was backstage. He said he will stop at nothing until Cena brings back the Authority.
Erick Rowan vs. Big Show in a Stairs Match
Big Show won a overly long and excruciating match to watch. This had no business going over eleven minutes. Crowd was dead the entire time. Just an awful match with mistimed spots. The stair stipulation was a terrible idea and nothing cool happened with them. Show won with KO punch then put the stairs over him for the pin. Horrible stuff and a contender for the Worst Match of the Year Award. (11:14) -*.
John Cena vs.Seth Rollins in a Tables Match with the stipulations of Cena losing his title shot if he does not win this match
Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt in a TLC Match
Dolph Ziggler vs. Luke Harper for the Intercontinental Title in a Ladder Match
Ryback vs. Kane in a Ladder Match
Erick Rowan vs. Big Show in a Stairs Match
Jack Swagger vs. Rusev for the U.S. Title
The Usos vs. Miz & Damien Mizdow for the Tag Team Titles
Nikki Bella vs. AJ Lee for the Diva's Title
Dolph Ziggler vs. Luke Harper for the IC Title in a Ladder Match
Ziggler won the title after taking Harper off of a ladder then climbing up to reach the belt. Brutal match with all sorts of crazy bumps. The first half was slow and seemed nothing more than a collection of crazy bumps with Ziggler overselling like crazy but this got a lot better as it went along. both guys bled and their bodies were covered in welts. This match did more for the IC Title than anything else has over the past few years (16:40) ***1/2.
The Usos vs. Miz & Damien Mizdow for the Tag Team Titles
They showed the clip from the preshow of Miz talking to Naomi. Dull match. The crowd was digging Mizdow but a lot of this was restholds. The Usos dominated early until Miz hit Jey with a DDT. After that the match went to a really slow pace. Miz shoved Sandow in the way of a dive then hit one of the Uso's with a belt to lose by DQ but keep the titles (7:17) *1/2.
Seth Rollins was backstage. He said he will stop at nothing until Cena brings back the Authority.
Erick Rowan vs. Big Show in a Stairs Match
Big Show won a overly long and excruciating match to watch. This had no business going over eleven minutes. Crowd was dead the entire time. Just an awful match with mistimed spots. The stair stipulation was a terrible idea and nothing cool happened with them. Show won with KO punch then put the stairs over him for the pin. Horrible stuff and a contender for the Worst Match of the Year Award. (11:14) -*.
John Cena just informed me that the live second screen experience starts....now.
ReplyDeleteSo I'm here.
Good thing he informed you
ReplyDeleteThey're actually doing this pre-show stuff better lately, I like that they at least attempt to make it look like a real sports experience.
ReplyDeleteI'm hoping for something interesting tonight, because this time of the year is already slow enough without an ice cold product dropping us further down.
ReplyDeleteIt's on like a steaming pot of neckbone.
ReplyDeleteDo you need some sort of accent to have that make sense......or even rhyme?
I know he has no interest but damn is it depressing knowing we'll get a night of JBL when Paul Heyman is sitting RIGHT THERE.
ReplyDeleteUnlike Survivor Series which had a massive main event and to a lesser extent Hell in a Cell, the lack of World title match really stands out here. Even if was just a 10 minute easy victory against the likes of Sheamus it would be better than no World champion for 3 months.
ReplyDeleteThe three top matches should all be pretty good and Rusev/Swagger should be good as well, even if the outcome seems obvious.
ReplyDeleteBut they definitely need to be building up to something. They are not at all right now. I hope this is the show that helps give the product a shot in the arm.
I agree. I wish the commentary team would follow suit. If I didn't know better I'd think JBL and Lawler were scrubs picked up off the street instead of being wrestling veterans.
ReplyDeleteBritish accent works best for that.
ReplyDeleteYou know what the problem is I think? They're in a holding pattern for Reigns, which leads to monotony at the top.
ReplyDelete"It is on not unlike a boiling pot that contains neckbones."
ReplyDeleteGood evening
ReplyDeleteDefinitely, which is why they're trying desperately to get us to care about Cena's chances at losing his number one contendership, they're trying to make it seem like something is on the line tonight.
ReplyDeleteI beat Dean/Bray it the motn.
Renee Young is breathtaking.
ReplyDeleteHey-o!
ReplyDeleteSo is an ugly baby.
ReplyDeleteSeinfeld references 24/7 over here.
The hashtag is still #TLC not #TLCS.
ReplyDeleteIt's only been like 4 months and I'm already considering going through the series again.
ReplyDeleteI make sure I go through them at least once a year.
ReplyDeleteI think it's better to just watch the pre-show and skip the four weeks of Raw that lead up to the PPV.
ReplyDeleteThese days babyfaces are about as smart as the pretty girl in a horror movie.
ReplyDeleteI really hope the goal is to give Rollins a signature win tonight, and get Cena into the Rumble and a fresh challenger to face Brock. Cena in the Rumble at least makes it less certain who wins, if only just. The status quo has no drama at all.
ReplyDeleteRun up the stairs or through the front door?
ReplyDeleteUpstairs always upstairs.
Who is this douchebag talking? I swear they have a new douchebag each month.
ReplyDeleteZiggler wins an award for best twitter handle even though his handle
ReplyDeleteis @HEELZiggler and he's in the middle of a strong babyface push.
"Pro wrestling is what my dad did."
(reposted from the NFL thread because I hadn't seen this one yet.)
didn't the pre-show use to be 30 minutes rather than a full hour long?
ReplyDeleteThat would be Douchebag Darryl. The replacement for Douchebag Donald who was there last month.
ReplyDeleteI'm was kinda hoping to see Brock doing 32 german suplexes on Cena.
ReplyDeleteYou should really be promoting your product, not it's price. No one fucking cares how much Netflix costs because it's awesome.
ReplyDeleteThose 9.99 commercials are kind of embarrassing.
If Ziggler turns heel and costs Cena the match tonight in lieu of facing Brock at the Rumble, I'm a happy man.
ReplyDeleteIt's funny it's called TLCS this year, since that's actually an anagram for "Probably Won't Be As Good as NXT."
ReplyDeleteI think this might be the best Stairs match yet!
ReplyDelete"Lunatic Fringe" is such an awful nickname. It just doesn't make sense.
ReplyDeleteI'm expecting a Bunny/Rose vs Cesaro/Kidd match to get on the card somewhere tonight.
ReplyDeleteI need some Bunny!
Next year it'll be Tables, Ladders, Chairs, Stairs, Cells and Bells.
ReplyDelete...did they even ever say what that means? Or how it's different than any other HC match?
ReplyDeleteWhy there isn't a company trying to hire you to book.
ReplyDeleteIt will be the template for all subsequent Stairs matches
ReplyDeleteCharlotte will be on the main roster so we can put Flairs into the list.
ReplyDeleteYou have a great writing.
ReplyDeletePoor Renee, having to pretend that the Dean video package didn't fiercely turn her on.
ReplyDeleteAnd cowbells.
ReplyDeleteI don't expect much from this show at all. With that being said here are my predictions:
ReplyDeletePRESHOW: New Day vs. Dust Bros. - Could very well be a MOTN contender. I expect it to be a lot of fun coming in somewhere around *** 1/2*'s. If they have the balls to give them enough time to have some fun out there. New Day pick up the win.
Ambrose vs Wyatt - I'm expecting tbis to sort of just be "there." Nothing special. A major disappointment. The pairing of these two was jsut a mistake. They both needed a feud where they could look entertaining and actually beat someone. Instead they will be 50/50'ed to right where they were before this all started and waste all of our time in the process. **
Dolph vs. Harper - Should be fun, but it already feels like something I've seen before. It will be a lot like their other matches. Dolph is in the dog house. Looks like Harper retains.** 3/4*
Bella vs AJ - Bella wins. Awful stuff. *
Swagger vs Rusev - Rusev wins. Another time waster. **
Ryback vs Kane ladder match - What are they climbing to get? Are they just using ladders? Lame. Should be awful. The masochists out there might enjoy this one. * The only logical ending would be Ryback wins so I imagine Kane wins for no reason.
Rowan vs. Big Show - Gotta keep Big Show strong. Big Show goes over clean. *
Uso's vs Mizdow - Hopefully Mizdow come out in Manziel jerseys. The Uso's are U SO Boring. I imagine this will be like every other matchup between these teams. ** Still not the time for Mizdow to turn on Miz.
Cena vs Rollins. I'm predicting MOTN here. ***1/2* Rollins wins by some sort of chicanery.
Overall a less than average show that doesn't compare to NXT at all. Coming out of the show things are setting up for more of the same boring shit going forward.
No Sting.
No fruit baskets to send out. .
I got the network and was planning on hunkering down, nursing my sickness with some cocoa, and watching TLC with you sick bastards. Then my parents want me to help put up Christmas lights. I feel bad for even griping about helping but dammit I had a plan set up!
ReplyDeleteI'm assuming it's like a Chairs match. where Stairs are available and legal but anything else is still a DQ.
ReplyDeleteI'm looking forward to the TLC match ending with Dean subtly building the elimination chamber around the ring while Maggle screams about Dean sending messages.
ReplyDeleteThat's bullshit!
ReplyDeleteSeriously, Heyman just sold this feud better in 60 seconds than WWE did with 20 hours of television.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
ReplyDeleteRyback vs. Kane could be the worst match of the year.
ReplyDeleteShe should visualize him banging Trina Michaels.
ReplyDeleteAt least with Ziggler there'll be some investment in the match, instead of feeling like a sadist.
ReplyDeleteNew Day vs Dusts is MOTN but you're not excited for Ambrose/Wyatt?
ReplyDelete....That's a unique POV.
He's a prophet.
ReplyDeleteThey need to get Kane out of the damn slacks.
ReplyDeleteI'm hoping Naomi gets added as special guest referee tonight.
ReplyDeleteYou're sick and your parents want you to go out in the cold and put up lights? Tell them they are terrible.
ReplyDeleteAlright, who you would vote for best on interviews and best non-wrestler?
ReplyDeleteMy answer would be Heyman for both.
My wife is begging me to do the same.
ReplyDeleteLe Sigh...
I don't think there's anyone in wrestling that I want to see wrestle less than Kane. Maybe Big Show. No, Big Show has actually had some pretty good matches with Sheamus and Del Rio within the last few years.
ReplyDeleteKhali for both.
ReplyDeleteExactly. Like if the Road Warriors were also known as the One Man Wrecking Crew
ReplyDeletePotential MOTN. I am ready to be disappointed by Ambrose vs Wyatt. I wasn't as high on their last network special match up as others and I expect some tom foolery to go down during this match. I am expecting it to come out VERY meeeeeeeh.
ReplyDeleteMiz should change his finisher's name to The Casting Couch.
ReplyDeleteI already skipped out on getting the Christmas Tree with them. I can't tell them to screw off with the lights too. My guilt is setting in already!
ReplyDeleteBig show is a much better cryer than Kane, but Kane looks better in slacks. Big show jsut can;t wrestle in slacks.
ReplyDeleteShow had at least one **** star match with those two.
ReplyDeleteYESYESYESYESYES
ReplyDelete"AGFHJMGGOKMNBLORNB!"
ReplyDeleteKhali agrees!
Riley makes no mention of that like year he spent as Miz's assistant.
ReplyDeleteYou have to hit your opponents head on each step without having your momentum broken.
ReplyDeleteFucking amazing.
ReplyDeleteYuck.
ReplyDeleteAt the guilt thing, not Christmas. You're sick. And wrestling. Mostly wrestling. Weekend. Tell them to hire someone.
I don't care who knows it, I love Miz.
ReplyDeleteKane is really suffering from overuse despite being a really talented wrestler. If he took a 3-6 month break and came back as the monster Kane again it would be so much fresher. He doesn't seem to have been off tv in years.
ReplyDeleteI really hate putting up decorations.
ReplyDelete"Jimmy hashn't been teshted yet."
ReplyDeleteBooker's speech impediment makes him sound like the shoopuff driver from Final Fantasy X.
I find it best to just make up a back story, like, Riley was Cosby'd by Miz and he's repressing it.
ReplyDeleteYou know what I miss? Pole matches that didn't end once you retrieved the object, but carried on with the object being legal to use as a weapon.
ReplyDeleteWow, now that is a fucking reference.
ReplyDeleteI suspect Brock Lesnar is somehow going to take the fall in the Stairs match,
ReplyDeleteMiz is a strange case, he has the look and the IT, but is average in the ring.
ReplyDeleteMiz is very underrated. Not everyone has to be Steamboat in the ring.
ReplyDelete"But mom TLC is on! I really have no interest in the show but my wrestling stories are on!"
ReplyDeleteCan you get DQed if you use a different weapon?
ReplyDeleteOh yeah, he kinda sucks as a wrestler, but as a "performer" or whatever he's awesome.
ReplyDeletePerhaps they could have explained exactly how one wins a stairs match.
ReplyDeleteI don't really understand the "stakes" of the Cena Rollins match. I mean, I guess I do, but wouldn't it kind of be unsaid that if you lose at a PPV, you would no longer be the number one contender for a championship? I dunno, what the fuck ever.
ReplyDeleteHe was a heat machine in 2010-2011, he's good to great as a heel.
ReplyDeleteWhat has Cena even done to be No. 1 contender?
ReplyDeleteIn my family we just give each other money and/or gift cards. We used to put them in fancy envelopes, but then we all decided "Who the hell are we trying to impress?"
ReplyDeleteMERCH!
ReplyDeleteIt's essentially a stairing contest.
ReplyDeleteIt would stand to reason that if you pin the champion in a non-title match, you'd get a title shot at some point. But part of the perks of being a secondary champion is apparently never having to face anyone that beats you.
ReplyDeleteHe was on a team that won or something even though he got eliminated?
ReplyDeleteYes. But the coal miners glove/nightstick/.......sock full of coins are perfectly legal. But only for the person who got them off the pole.
ReplyDeleteThank you for explaining that metal stairs are heavy.
ReplyDelete"He bung your girlfriend last night."
ReplyDelete-WWE
He defeated Brock in the rematch, defeated Orton in October, and ... ???
ReplyDeleteI laughed.
ReplyDeleteThe breakdown of the Stairs match is either extremely dumb or it proves that WWE are in ont he joke.
ReplyDeletePor que no los dos?
ReplyDeleteHahaha good one.
ReplyDeleteThey should start using that as a means to build wrestlers up since it'd make more sense. "By way of having most merchandise and Twitter mentions, John Cena is the No. 1 contender!"
ReplyDeleteI'm not kidding when I say that family is seriously one of the most unimportant things ever. An average television show or a whistling contest with your cat is more valuable to your overall life achievement.
ReplyDeleteIt could be both that's true.
ReplyDeleteI expect the Stairs match to escalate quickly.
ReplyDeleteThey made stairs look like a feat of engineering with that video.
ReplyDeleteAnd I still don't get the match.
Using that method, Cena would fight for the title at every PPV.
ReplyDeleteI like the vintner aspect of Erick Rowan. I think he should taste wines after he wins a match, and work in wine-tasting cliches into his promos.
ReplyDeleteHe LOST a right to face Rollins match to Ambrose, which somehow led to a #1 contender match vs. Orton that he won. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteMan, for some reason I really want a Mountain Dew Kick Start and a poorly set up PPV.
ReplyDeleteThe loser of the Stairs match is going to be the first guy who fails to watch his step.
ReplyDeleteI've said it a thousand time. Bolt the steps down to the ring. How many wrestlers have to be injured and disqualified before the WWE spends the three dollars for a handful of bolts?
ReplyDeleteHe needs to do the Gangrel spit but with Wine.
ReplyDeleteWasn't the Brock win by DQ?
ReplyDeleteHow does Hoss eat a salad?
ReplyDeleteWith bacon and blue cheese dressing on that bitch!
#HOSSHEALTHFOOD
Yep
ReplyDeleteSo what is the idea of this stairs match? Can't use anything other than stairs?
ReplyDeleteOf course.
ReplyDeleteYou're a genius. I've been over here trying to figure out some wordplay on this for like 10 minutes.
ReplyDeleteOr they could just develop some new talent since Kane has, you know, been around for 18 years. Either way though.
ReplyDeleteI think the Stairs match is a step too far
ReplyDeleteRowan can really riser through the ranks with a win in the stairs match tonight.
ReplyDeleteThey should have a stairdown before the match.
ReplyDeleteKinda just wanna see a wrestler that gets in, beats the crap out of the opponent and leaves. No celebration whatsoever, just goes back to the locker room.
ReplyDeleteHis name is Baron Corbin
ReplyDeleteI watched the latest Smackdown on Hulu this morning, and I was again struck by just how fucking great a worker Goldust is. I'm really glad the dude got his life together, and am almost equally annoyed at the way they killed off that team's heat with the NAO.
ReplyDeleteWasn't that Bad News Brown?
ReplyDeleteAham, I would like to see more dudes like that.
ReplyDelete"What are you going to do? Release the dogs? Or the stairs? Or the dogs with stairs in their mouths and when they bark they shoot stairs at you?"
ReplyDeleteHe's going to deliver a ZESTY beating to Big Show's FULL BODY.
ReplyDeleteThe stairs match is making us step in unfamiliar ground.
ReplyDeleteCurrently on S3, The Red Dot.
ReplyDeleteZiggler seems motivated...says he'll steal the show and says the ladder match will be the "best damn thing I've ever done." I know this is in character and all for him, but hope he and Harper bring it tonight.
ReplyDeleteThere's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold
ReplyDeleteAnd she's buying a stairway to heaven.
....and then we have a close up and see one tear rolling down his cheek and we'd learn a lesson about how using pretend violence isn't any way to solve your scripted problems
ReplyDeletehttps://twitter.com/chaddundas/status/543933238168023041
ReplyDeleteI can't wait to watch Big Show and Eric Rowan rail on each other. Those two are really going to need to step up their game because this match could spiral out of control quickly, at least that's the worst case scenario.
ReplyDeleteJust got here. You'll all like Edens dress. Enjoy the show!
ReplyDeleteOk. That's it. I've been here for about 2 mins, and I've already seen too many puns involving stairs.
ReplyDeletePuns suck.
Lame puns suck worse.
You guys are stumbling into WWE announce team territory.
I'm kind of excited for Kane-Ryback. I hope it lives up to the glorious disaster I picture in my head.
ReplyDeleteRandom dancing black guys!
ReplyDeleteEvening Hoss,
ReplyDeleteOld complaint but don't care: the fucking music this company uses as its theme songs is ridiculous.
ReplyDeleteDancin' black guys!
ReplyDeleteanother thought about Smackdown....I don't know who the announcer sitting in the center taking Cole's place was, but I remember thinking he was pretty good. Which is weird for a WWE broadcast these days.
ReplyDeleteThat would be funny if they just added random object each year as an joke
ReplyDeleteEvening, Mike.
ReplyDeleteBojangles Chicken, Uncle Ben's rice and Aunt Jemima present the New Day!
ReplyDeleteHello psycho. Um. Artist formerly known as kid?
ReplyDeleteNew Day entrance > Finn Balor entrance.
ReplyDeleteWait, which symbol is the greater than and which one is the less than?
Lol I'm the opposite. My mom and dad have always been super cool and supportive of me. That's why even though I'm sick and wanna watch TLC I'll put up Christmas lights. Because my parents are fucking awesome and I'll make the small sacrifice. Anyone else could go to hell if they asked though.
ReplyDeleteShould've ended with
ReplyDelete"You guys are a few steps away from WWE announce team territory."
The stairs are going to get more discussion that the ladders tonight aren't they?
ReplyDeleteProbably. But they also used to have less than 10 hours of really dull programming each week too. Times change
ReplyDeleteHello! I'm at TLC!
ReplyDeletePretty close.
ReplyDeleteThere really used to be a restaurant chain called Sambo's
ReplyDeleteNever watched a minute of Celebrity Apprentice but I am all in this year.
ReplyDeleteWe'll talk about them ladder.
ReplyDeleteThat was an unfortunate crowd shot. New Day trying to hype the crowd and 1 person out of 200 in view clapping along.
ReplyDeleteIt's too bad New Day wasn't around with Fatu to make a difference.
ReplyDeleteWOW, is the arena packed?
ReplyDeleteI don't mind being called kid or John like Curry calls me.
ReplyDeletethat's one more than Raw
ReplyDeleteStardust doesn't work in green.
ReplyDeletethanks for lying to us about it. When people throw them like darts, no way they weigh near 300 lbs.
ReplyDeletejerks.
My god is "New Day" a horrible gimmick.
ReplyDeleteIf you table that motion i'll chair the meeting.
ReplyDeleteBigger pop for the Dust Bros. than for New Day. This sucks--all of these guys could be great, but they're given awful gimmicks. (Goldust and Cody = great, Goldust and Stardust = awful)
ReplyDeleteI like Goldust.
ReplyDeleteI like Cody.
I don't like this.
Kofi looks skinnier.
ReplyDeleteBlasphemy.
ReplyDeleteLove the Dust Brothers. Wish I had more of a reason to.
ReplyDeleteI haven't even started drinking yet, this thread has serious potential.
ReplyDeleteI mean, the end game of New Day has to be the three of them snapping at how stupid the gimmick is and turning from "dancing Negroes" to "angry Negroes" right?
ReplyDeleteThe only way to make New Day entertaining is to have them loot the arena.
ReplyDeleteDoes Goldust count as Blackface?
ReplyDeleteJBL just said he's green with envy....
ReplyDeletetss?
I'm just trying to keep ahead of Cole.
ReplyDeleteWell, it's a New Day. I'm here. What's the happy-happs?
ReplyDeleteThe Natural vs the most athletic wrester working today, maybe ever.
ReplyDeleteOdd.
New Day is hiding things. Put them in hoodies
ReplyDeleteKofi=Year 6 of badly needing a heel turn.
ReplyDelete:: facepalm ::
ReplyDeletegoddammit...
Thank you, Marv. SHouldn't you be at the office or something?
I haven't been paying attention much the last month or so, Dustin is looking in amazing shape.
ReplyDeleteThanks for explaining where the Great Gazoo comes from for us Cole. Fucking hell.
ReplyDeleteWho was JBL talking about, who likes to have fun?
ReplyDeleteYou know JBL's talkin' about Barry Windham.
It's only the pre-show and the announce team already can't pretend to care about whats in the ring. Flintstones and Fonzie?
ReplyDeleteThis just in:
ReplyDeleteBig E is strong.
Was there all day yesterday and most of today, now I've got my weed and fireball and Heineken. So ready for a night off.
ReplyDeleteFireball? Whazzat?
ReplyDeleteCody is devoted to his gimmick, as always. But God...it's an awful gimmick and WWE gives us no reason to like or dislike the team.
ReplyDeleteSo how long until that Atlantic guy follows up with a new article about blacks in WWE and say "see, I told you so."
ReplyDeleteAnd freaking athletic for his size. I wouldn't be surprised if he pops a moonsault someday.
ReplyDeleteThat... Looked better on paper.
ReplyDeleteStupid ass gimmick aside, this New Day team could work nicely.
ReplyDeleteshame the big bossman isn't around to choke out those new day guys
ReplyDelete