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October Countdown: WWE Bragging Rights 2009

Hey Scott,

Big fan, yadda yadda, just wondering when you're gonna get off your fat fucking lazy ass and rant the PPV?

Kind regards,

Dan.

Wouldn’t watching the PPV require me remaining on my fat fucking lazy ass?  There seems to be a gap in logic there.  In the mean time, you get this and like it.

The SmarK Rant for WWE Bragging Rights 2009

- Live from Pittsburgh, PA.

- Your hosts are Michael & Jerry & Todd

- So apparently the winner of the metaphorical bragging rights gets an actual trophy. Really? In 2009?  (And in 2010!  Thankfully they came to their senses and dropped it in 2011.) 

The Miz v. John Morrison

You've gotta feel a little bit bad for Marty Jannetty, having been turned into even more of a punchline than he was before.  (The sad thing is that I have no idea which one I was mocking there.  I assume Miz, but then he’s the guy who went on to main event Wrestlemania and Morrison is doing guest spots on Zack Ryder’s internet show these days.  Although neither guy is exactly Shawn MIchaels.)  Morrison rides him down to start and controls with an armbar for two. Shoulderblock gets two. Miz bails and heads back in for a side headlock. Morrison escapes with a pancake and gets the standing moonsault for two. Miz hammers away and tosses him, but Morrison comes back in with a sunset flip for two. Rollup gets two. They fight over a backslide, but Morrison clotheslines Miz to the floor instead and follows with a baseball slide. Glad we missed that because of the director showing the locker rooms watching the match. (Team Smackdown!  Team RAW!  Team Miz!  Team Morrison! Everyone loves to support a Team according to Stephanie!)  Morrison goes for a flying headscissors and gets dumped to the floor, and back in Miz gets a backdrop suplex for two and takes over. Morrison slugs back, but Miz clotheslines him in the corner and adds a kneelift for two. We hit the chinlock, but Morrison rolls him up for two. Another rollup gets two. They slug it out and Morrison wins with a legsweep and adds a leg lariat for two. Shining Wizard misses and Miz rolls him up for two. Morrison with the Moonlight Drive for two, but Miz bails to escape Starship Pain. Morrison hits him with a plancha instead, and that gets two. Morrison puts him on top, but Miz hits him with a double axehandle. Morrison comes back with a Russian legsweep and goes to finish, but Miz knocks him down and pins him at 10:55. The announcers were all "The winner of this is the conquering hero who hit the home run!" and stuff, but the crowd wasn't really into it. They really need to better inform the crowds when it's the most important PPV of the year, because otherwise people just think for themselves. Match was fine, as they have good chemistry. ***

Michelle McCool, Natalya & Beth Phoenix v. Melina, Kelly Kelly & Gail Kim

Kim starts with Phoenix and gets a rollup out of a slam attempt for two, so McCool tags herself in. That goes nowhere, so Natalya comes in and slams Kim. Gail gets a kneelift off the apron and it's over to the RAW side, where Kelly gets a Nash choke in the corner, but gets dropped on the top rope for two. The Smackdown team works Kelly over in the corner and Phoenix gets a snapmare for two. Kelly plays face in peril and McCool throws knees, but Beth comes in and gets rolled up for two. Hot tag Melina and she faceplants Phoenix and gets a small package, but McCool turns them over for two. It's BONZO GONZO and Beth finishes Melina with the Glam Slam at 6:51. Totally watchable. **1/2  (Three years later and only Nattie is foolish enough to continue waiting for her turn to be pushed in this company.) 

Meanwhile, D-X tries to rally the troops, inadvertently insulting everyone on the team ("And we exposed this guy as a fake Jamaican!") but still getting the solidarity desired.

Smackdown World title: Undertaker v. Batista v. CM Punk v. Rey Mysterio

Punk declaring "It's clobbering time!" on the ramp is pretty awesome. Batista chases Punk to start, and walks right into Undertaker's punch. Punk hammers on UT in the corner, and that's an epic fail as Taker tosses him into a Mysterio dive from the apron. Rey dropkicks Taker out of the ring, but walks into a boot. Taker goes to work on Batista with Old School, but Punk prevents a second attempt and fights on the top rope with UT. He manages a superplex and Rey springboards in for two. Batista beats on Punk and adds a powerslam, but Taker puts him down with a big boot. Rey tries diving in with a rana, but Taker counters to the Last Ride, and Batista spears UT out of that. Rey and Batista argue over who gets to cover, but Taker pops up, so Rey gets the 619 on Taker, into Batista's spinebuster for two. Rey goes up again and gets caught by Punk with GTS for two. Batista goes after Taker and gets caught in the gogoplata, but Punk breaks that up and hits the running knee on Taker. That leads to the Last Ride for two. Taker and Batista slug it out and Batista gets chokeslammed for two. Punk goes after Taker and gets tossed, leaving UT to finish Batista, but Batista counters with the Batista bomb for two. Rey breaks it up and gets two, and there's your heel turn for Batista. Unfortunately, Batista gets so distracted by the dark side of the Force that a chokeslam from Undertaker gets two. (Uh, sorry, Mr. Mouse, sir, I meant “The alternate side of the public domain religion.”  Please don’t sue me now.  Loved the Avengers!)  They clothesline each other and Punk gets two on both of them. Rey comes back in and Batista tosses him, but Undertaker finishes Batista with the tombstone at 9:56 to retain. Well that was fast-paced, to say the least. I liked all the crazy finishers for the first 8 minutes or so, but it kind of fell apart once Batista turned. Needed to go to the finish as soon as Batista nailed Rey, but it was really entertaining otherwise. ***1/4

Afterwards, Josh interviews Rey & Batista, and Rey is all "Well, we did our best", and Batista attacks him again to really drive the point home. And people CHEER him. (That’s because he’s fucking awesome.)  Well, that was a pretty awesome heel turn with some good menace from Batista ("I'm not playing. I'm gonna rip your head off.") so you can hardly blame them. And a really good, high quality heel turn with solid motivation has been lacking for a while now, so good on them.  (Has there even BEEN one since then?  Big Show maybe, although that had the crying and begging for his job thing preceding it.  I feel like Randy Orton is gonna turn again soon, and it’s going to be an EPIC backstabbing on someone because he really seems bored in his current role and I think he’d take to an evil predator role again really well.) 

Bragging Rights Trophy final: HHH, Shawn Michaels, Big Show, Mark Henry, Jack Swagger, Cody Rhodes & Kofi Kingston v. Chris Jericho, Kane, Matt Hardy, Finlay, R-Truth, DH Smith & Tyson Kidd

(Almost as exciting a lineup as this year’s Survivor Series main event.  And a lot of the same people!)  Once again the announcers lie about RAW being the "longest running episodic show in TV history," which it's not. The Simpsons and Law & Order have been running longer than RAW, and 60 Minutes has not only run longer but has produced more episodes. (Much like Meltzer, my blood boils every time I hear that stupid made-up honor and I MUST REFUTE IT.  Or else!)  Rhodes and Truth do some brawling to start, but Cody tags out to Show. So we get Show v. Kane instead, and Show puts him down and follows with a legdrop for two. Swagger comes in and gets in Kane's face, and that proves to be a bad idea. The Smackdown side beats on Swagger in the corner, and Hardy gets a clothesline for two. Swagger charges and hits boot, and Matt follows with the yodeling legdrop for two. To the floor, where Hardy clotheslines him, and we get our first RAW v. Smackdown standoff. Matt gets caught in the RAW corner and Henry tosses him around, then Shawn works on the arm until Matt hits a Side Effect. Over to Finlay, who whips Shawn into the corner for a Flair Flip, but they collide for the double KO. Shawn recovers first with the superkick, but the Hart Dynasty sneaks in with a Hart Attack to keep Shawn in the corner. And it's Jericho time, as he goes to a chinlock.

Cole, while talking about Big Show: "Big Show there, looking at his partner. Well, no partners tonight!" Except for the six partners on his team, I guess. Kane comes in with a seated dropkick for two. Grisham accidentally calls the Hart Dynasty "The Hart Foundation" and MICHAEL COLE makes fun of him for saying something stupid. Buh-zing. (It’s BAZINGA.  But then Big Bang Theory wasn’t quite the cultural phenomenon in 2009 that it is now.  By the way, I’m totally serious. People who don’t live in Canada don’t understand how that show completely dominates every facet of TV up here.  It is literally one of the highest-rated shows in Canadian TV history, and the Comedy Network runs a marathon basically every stat holiday, plus it’s constantly, CONSTANTLY shown in syndication, often in two hour blocks like the Simpsons, on any station that can buy the rights to it up here.  Sheldon shirts are everywhere and worn totally without irony in public, and there’s ads for it all over.  It’s EVERYWHERE.  I mean, I love the show too, but you can basically pick anyone off the street at random and engage them in a conversation about last week’s episode and if they think Raj is gay or not.) Smith comes in with a backdrop suplex on Shawn for two. Kidd slingshots in with an elbow, but misses, and it's hot tag HHH. He runs wild on the Harts and hits everyone with spinebusters, but Kane chokeslams him. Kidd gets two off that. Jericho with a bulldog, but the Lionsault misses and Kofi comes in. Jericho counters the, uh, Boom Drop into a Liontamer attempt, but Kofi rolls him up for two. (Sadly “Boomdrop” became the totally non-ironic name for that move.) Trouble in Ghana gets two and it's breaking loose in Tulsa again, as everyone does their wacky finishers. Kofi looks to finish, but Big Show turns on him, revealing that his alliance to the World tag team titles is more important than a meaningless trophy. (NO PARTNERS TONIGHT!  It was FORESHADOWING!) I'm shocked, I don't know about you. Jericho pins Kofi at 15:31 to give Smackdown the trophy. Sadly, no one smashes it. Too short to give everyone any kind of time in the match, but it was another good fast-paced match for the night. ***1/2

RAW World title, Iron Man match: Randy Orton v. John Cena

Cena with the headlock to start, and Orton also goes that route. Cena fights out and Orton sends him into the corner and Cena tries a bulldog, but Orton counters that and stomps the back. Cena takes him down with an STF out of nowhere, however, and Orton taps out at 3:55. Cena is 1-0. Smart booking there, as Orton tapped immediately rather than let himself get injured.  (If only Jon Jones would have learned that lesson.) 

30 second rest period follows, and Orton charges in with a powerslam, then chokes away on the ropes. Suplex gets two. Orton goes to the CHINLOCK OF DOOM, but Cena escapes with the Throwback and goes up for the legdrop. Five knuckle shuffle is countered with the RKO, and we're tied 1-1 at 9:00.

Cena bails to the apron and Orton sends him into the railing, then clears the announce table and nails Cena with the monitor. That gets two. You know, it's 2009, they should really have switched to LCD monitors by now.  (Or iPad or something.  Like really, what IS up with that?  Even TNA, who does free tapings and whores out their TV time to Direct Auto while losing millions has nicer equipment for the announce team.)  Orton brings the microphone into the ring and puts Cena down for two. And Cena is BLEEDING. Holy shit, that's only the second time this year someone has done that. (They came down HARD on the blood edict at this point, making sure that any stragglers who still wanted to gig themselves for their art were snuffed out like the proverbial candle in the wind.)  They want to check the cut, but Cena is too angry and tosses Orton, before getting sent into the stairs himself. Orton gets two off that. Orton stomps Cena's head on the stairs and gets two. Back in, Orton slugs away while the announcers talk about how the doctors might have to stop the match because of Cena's cut. C'mon, Jerry Lawler would bleed more than that during his PROMOS, why would he ever say something like that? This TV-PG shit is fucking stupid. (Get used to it.  Although in the age of Hep-C and other disgusting blood-borne illnesses, in a lot of ways I’m glad they’re being safer about it.  Maybe we can go back to my personal favorite:  Biting down on a condom full of fake blood to simulate internal injuries!) Cena comes back with the Shuffle and FU, but Orton counters to an RKO in mid-air and both are down and out. So the ref counts them both out at 17:00 to make it 2-2. Well that's kind of a pointless fall, although it does save Orton from going down 2-1, so I guess it makes sense in that regard. I retract my criticism.  (Not often I do that.  Usually I’ll fight to the death to defend whatever stupid stance I’ve taken that day.) 

They fight to the top rope and Cena gets the FU off the top, for the pin to go up 3-2 at 19:38. And Legacy runs in for the beatdown, because why not? It's no DQ anyway. After the 30 second rest period, Orton pins Cena at 20:55 to make it 3-3. Kofi Kingston chases Legacy away to explain their departure.

They brawl to the stage and Orton rams Cena into the pyro table, which sets off an explosion on the ramp. That seems to inspire him, so he throws Cena into the lighting grid for more silly special effects, and that makes it 4-3 Orton at 25:33. Orton continues to play with the pyro board, which has GOT to be setting something up, and indeed he puts Cena down with a chair and drags him over the pyro and then threatens to BLOW HIM UP REAL GOOD. Sadly, it doesn't work, because it would have been the most over-the-top retardedly awesome finish in wrestling history. So with that devious plan foiled, they fight back to ringside as Jerry Lawler has to say with a serious inflection "Guys, Randy Orton's intentions were to blow up John Cena." I can't even type that without cracking up. (I wish Ryback had been involved, because then I could have said “He was already blown up!” but Cena is pretty awesome, cardio-wise.)  Was he going to ask for ONE…BILLION…DOLLARS first? Was his next step the sharks with frickin' laser beams on their heads? They've crossed the line from wrestling into Austin Powers, folks. (Vince Russo was WAY ahead of them…) Anyway, Orton hits Cena with the stairs for two, then a chair for two. Back in, Cena gets the cradle out of nowhere for the pin at 33:00 to make it 4-4. Orton tries to beat up Cena during the rest period, and the ref is like "You've gotta give him 30 seconds!" Are you kidding? You're gonna tell that to the guy who tried to murder someone with a PYRO BOARD?  (In all fairness, it was only ATTEMPTED murder.  I mean, to quote Sideshow Bob, they don’t give out Nobel Prizes for attempted chemistry.)

So Orton gives him the 30 seconds, then drags him to the apron and DDTs him to the floor to make it 5-4 at 35:15. After the rest period, he covers again and gets two. Back into the ring for the Garvin Stomp, which gets two. Orton slugs him down for two. Very slowly. Cena suddenly makes the comeback, rapidly shifting as usual between playing a corpse and moving planets as Superman, and Orton bails to think the situation over. (In all fairness, Superman hasn’t been able to move planets since before the John Byrne revamp in 1987, and certainly not after the New 52.  Although maybe he was super-duper-overpowered again around 2009, but I wasn’t reading very much in the way of comics at that point so I’m not sure.)  Lawler thinks that 19:00 is too long for Orton to stall, but that never stopped Larry Zbyszko before. They slug it out on the ramp and then Orton runs all the way back to the ring again to waste more time. So back into the ring, Orton attacks and pounds away on the mat, then tries his DDT, but Cena reverses out and Orton bails again. Into the crowd this time for the time-wasting brawl, as Cena sends Orton down the stairs and back to ringside again for two. Into the stairs for two. Nice visual as he tosses Orton through the timekeeper's barricade, then hits him with the STEEL steps. Then he stops to prep the table, and sets up the stairs next to it. That seems like an oddly specific plan for revenge. As it turns out, he carries Orton up the stairs on his back and puts him through the table with the FU. That ties it up at 5-5 at 51:00.

Cena brings another table into the ring and puts Orton's lifeless body on it, but then goes up and tries a flying splash. That backfires on him, of course, and they slug it out from their knees as the crowd boos Cena's comeback. The ref is bumped and Orton gets the RKO, but it only gets two, even with Charles Robinson sprinting in. Oh no, I said a referee's name, I hope Vince doesn't sue me or yell in my headset. (It’s so funny in the dark way that I love so much that they spent YEARS making sure no one would ever speak the name of a referee on WWE TV and turning them into nameless nothings, only to suddenly be all “BRAD MADDOX!” when the situation required an evil referee, and they’re shocked when it doesn’t get over.)  Orton gets rid of that ref and stops to talk to the voices in his head, but misses the PUNT OF DOOM and gets caught in the STF. He holds on for nearly a minute, but taps at 1:00:00 to give Cena the belt back. I liked the Hell in a Cell match better, actually, as I found this even more slow and plodding than usual for an Orton match and couldn't take it seriously after Orton tried to kill him with fireworks. I don't get where some people are getting "All time classic" from at all. ***1/4  (Yeah, like seriously, who even remembers this match outside of the pyro board spot?) 

The Pulse:

A good show with yet another in the endless series of World title changes that mean nothing. (Oh…JUST WAIT.)  Nothing bad and all good matches means an easy thumbs up, but this is nothing I'm ever going to go back and watch again.

Comments

  1. If you don't have a classic on the card, then a good top-to-bottom show is sufficient and this was a surprisingly solid show start to finish (I like the main event a bit more than Scott, attempted pyrocide and all); I actually own this on DVD.

    I'm probably in the deep minority, but I'm glad they've rid themselves of blading. I've never been a fan of blood unless it was hardway; I could never see past the goofiness of every item causing a straight laceration to the forehead and, for me, it broke the suspension of disbelief than actually strengthening it. It especially got silly once guys like Flair, HHH, and HBK began to overuse it as a crutch in lieu of good storytelling.

    And the "don't say the ref's name" stuff was pretty ri-goddamn-diculous, esp. since Charles Robinson was the most prominent ref they had. What was it supposed to accomplish anyway? Fucking stupid.

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  2. BBT is big in the US, too. Maybe not quite as big as it is in Canada, but I believe it was the highest rated TV show (if not show, then just comedy) this past Thursday, beating out Modern Family.

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  3. It's hard to explain how much more popular the show is up here. Think of it like this: When I say the show has insanely high ratings in Canada, the US equivalent wouldn't be the highest rated comedy, it would be like a football playoff game on a major network. EVERY WEEK.

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  4. I'm almost hoping Orton doesn't turn, because if he does, you just know he's going to start feuding with Cena. And really, nobody wants to see that happen again.

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  5. 2 out of 14 people isn't a lot of the same people.

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  6. 3 out of 14. BOOM. PWNED.


    *Runs around the blog at ringside like Foley*

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  7. "Wouldn’t watching the PPV require me remaining on my fat fucking lazy ass?"


    That's too funny. What PPV was he talking about? And why would anyone think Raj is gay? I haven't seen the newer episodes (I just watch the reruns on TBS), but he nailed Penny and he's pretty much obsessed with Bernadette, seems pretty straight to me. If anyone comes off like a closet homo it's Howard.

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  8. I have to assume Flair blades while he's shaving now, especially since he has no other outlet for it at the moment.

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  9. Likewise I'm perfectly happy at the reduction in blading.

    If you step back from the wrestling bubble there's no way to look at it but as a pretty sick form of people mutilating themselves for our entertainment. I'm quite happy to live without that, particularly when it gets to the point Flair has taken it to where all he has left is self mutilation.

    That said I hate the current thing of stopping matches to treat a cut. It's ridiculous. If someone bleeds hard way let it go, it can only add to the match. If someone does want to blade and it's not been sanctioned, fine them or job them out the next night. Just don't stop the match.

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  10. Raj is just flamboyant, but he never does have a girlfriend on the show. He never did the deed with Penny, btw. I can't remember the explanation at the beginning of season 5, though.

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  11. Oh and you're spot on with the whole ref no name thing. No idea what it was supposed to accomplish. It's a solution in search of a problem as its not like there were loads of people switching off RAW every time Mike Chioda got a name check.

    It's as bizarre as that weird post 9/11 period where everyone was suddenly american, including those famous sons of New York and Florida; Jericho & Benoit

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  12. *gets a papercut*
    *punches it open and bleeds like a motherfucker*

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  13. It's getting half-way there, at 15.8 million viewers last Thursday. That show has increased in viewers, too, which is amazing, considering the show was a little better in the beginning. I still love it now ("BLUEBERRY IN MY NOSE! BLUEBERRY IN MY NOSE!"), just not quite as much.

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  14. I remember sitting near ringside at Judgment Day 2004 and getting queasy at Eddie's blood all over the railing near me. He must've caught an artery with that gig considering he passed out.

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  15. I'm from Canada and I think Big Bang Theory sucks. No idea why it's so popular on either side of the border.

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  16. According to Wikipedia, he blew his load before he could do the deed. Season 5 hasn't been shown in reruns yet, so I haven't seen it.

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  17. "seriously, who even remembers this match outside of the pyro board spot"
    I didn't even remember that much. I'm reading this over and thinking "wait, Cena and Orton had an iron man match?" And I was actually paying attention to WWE at this point.

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  18. I like it for the most part; my big knock against it is when the laugh track kicks in even on non-joke lines.

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  19. I was gonna say, if Big Bang Theory is the most popular show up there, thank God I don't live in Canada. Quite possibly the worst show on television, as pretty much all the characters are forgettable and unlikeable, and the plots suck too.

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  20. "Buh ZING" reminds me of the terrible new Ruffles commercial they air all the time here with the Asian chick who turns into a street rat during a game of poker because she's eating chips. So Bad, Dude.

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  21. There was a bit in a Cracked article once about BBT's overwhelming popularity in Canada. It's apparently a "thing".

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  22. That's not really "street rat", it's kind of the style for poker players: hoodies, shades, headphones. I had a World Series of Poker game on a phone once that had a girl that looked just like that, actually, Asian and everything.

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  23. Wow, I didn't even know that Orton and Cena had an Iron Man match. I should really check it ou-BWAHAHAHAHAAH!

    I'm not looking forward to an Orton heel turn unless he changes his character from his last bad guy run. Not sure I could stand those SLOOOOOOOW walks down the aisle and even slower promos.

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  24. Not a laugh track. Live audience.

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  25. re: at the time or ever?

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  26. Will there be a Caliber Winfield tie-in joke?!?!


    TUNE INTO NITRO TO FIND OUT!

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  27. If you listen to McMahon on commentary, he NEVER used the officials' names. Monsoon, Brain and Jesse would all use some variation (Ventura always put Referee in front of the name, "Referee Marella makes him break").

    I always just assumed Vince forced the change because that's how HE did things when he was in the booth.

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  28. Im not a fan either.


    They are smart... but not rich!
    One of them cant talk to girls...
    EDGY!
    The chick is decent looking... nothing to write home about.


    Now that chick from warehouse 13... Outside of her upper lip, she is a choice piece of ass.

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  29. "You've gotta feel a little bit bad for Marty Jannetty, having been turned into even more of a punchline than he was before."

    you were literally talking about Jannetty. because part of the feud between Miz and Morrison was them debatting on air who would turn out the Shawn Michaels and who would be the Marty Jannetty of their team - indicating that being Marty Jannetty means you would turn out a total loser (which btw is far away from the truth. at least Jannetty was a solid midcard guy for some time, even winning the intercontinental and the tag team titles when they still meant something).

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  30. "Medium Sexy" Caliber WinfieldOctober 31, 2012 at 5:50 AM

    Oh my God. Finally, SANE people who realize that Big Bang Theory SUCKS. I honest to God believe it's the worst comedy show ever made. And yeah, I'm including My Mother The Car, and Homeboys In Outerspace.

    I mean, did Chuck Loree sit and think "well, I've made 2 And A Half Men, and that really sucks, so now I'll do another show. Say, I just saw an episode of Saved By The Bell and they had some nerds on there! Nerds are funny! They dress like idiots and are afraid of pretty women!"

    It's fucking pathetic. Then you have everyone jacking off over Sheldon, who's nothing more than a complete rip off of Stewie, who's nothing more than a complete rip-off of Mr. Burns.

    Absolutely NONE of the characters are likeable, whatsoever. And every episode works out like this; "Sheldon is being bullied, so he takes karate to deal with the bully." and that's the whole episode. We never see him deal with the bully. Just what he did to prepare. That's every episode.

    Then you have that God-awful laugh track every 5-6 seconds, and that's no joke. Every 5-6 seconds. Any show these days that still has a laugh track is crafted simply for the brain dead morons who don't know when to laugh. Shows like The Office [before season 8], New Girl, and My Name Is Earl are actually funny, creative, and DON'T HAVE A LAUGH TRACK BECAUSE IT'S NOT THE 1960s!

    Oh, but worry not! Because Raj, who's a NERD, just said "for shizzle!", and that's funny! Because that's how black people talk! And all black people are tough gangsters! And Raj ISN'T a gangster! Isn't that funny?! Oh snaps! Raj just said "lock up your daughters we're going to hit it and quit it!" and that's SO funny! Because guys who have lots of intercourse and lots of girlfriends would say that and Raj isn't one of those types! He's a nerd who dresses stupid!

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  31. ...but it's still better than most of the other sitcoms which are out there today.

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  32. I'm not a huge fan either but my whole family is completely enamoured.


    Very fake social awkwardness, HILARIOUS!

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  33. Do you often write home when you see a pretty girl?


    Like, just an email, or actually pen to paper?

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  34. I'm fine without blading, it's unnecessary and just a tad barbaric.

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  35. For someone who hates it so much. You sure know alot about it.

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  36. I write scarlet letters in blood on my moms house when i see hot chicks.


    Im Green.

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  37. This PPV did have one highlight, in that the writers actually used logic and continuity to turn the finish of the 7-on-7 match into an Orton-Kofi feud. How they slipped that one past Vince, I don't know.

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  38. Yeah that show blows.

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  39. Judging by the other replies, I might be the only one here who likes Big Bang Theory. It's kinda funny that the rest of the replies criticize it because it's not based in reality enough...pretty much all TV comedies stray from realistic behavior or realistic situations. Normally, it's that straying (whether it's the characters from the situation or the situation from the characters) that provides the laughs.



    Sheldon is THE man. The character is completely comfortable with himself and who he is, but very uncomfortable with other people or to be around other people. You don't see that very often on TV, at least in the way he is portrayed. He is also blunt and condescending, which is something all people would like to be from time to time (kinda like a certain wrestler who gave stunners to his boss).



    And someone said that Kaley Cuoco is "decent" and nothing to write home about? REALLY? Really? It's impossible to argue with someone who takes that stance because it would be outside the realm of any possible debate about her. Extraordinarily pretty/hot with a keen sense of comic timing? Yes, please. She's not even the type I go for, but again, yes, please.


    It's a bit crude (like other Lorre sitcoms), but it definitely works a lot better with the characters. Geeks have testosterone, too, and it's nice to see that on TV.



    Lastly, I think we all have a friend/acquaintance/co-worker that is like one of these characters. A sex-driven geek, an arrogant sociopath, the "good guy" that finishes last, and the guy doesn't even know where/when to start when it comes to playing the field.



    For some reason, it appeals to geeky people, grandmothers and moms, frat boys, remarkably average guys, blue collar folks who have never been called a "nerd," and so on. Maybe that begins to answer your question.

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  40. Oh, and God bless Canada.

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  41. God, I hate that you're making me agree with you.

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  42. No, it's really not. Of course, as I often have to remind myself, comedy (and taste) is subjective.

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  43. Sheldon is not a Stewie rip-off.

    The Office, New Girl and My Name Is Earl don't have a laugh track because they are filmed with a single camera, and not shot in front of a studio audience.

    Having a single camera doesn't automatically make a show funny, nor does shooting in front of an audience make a show unfunny.

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  44. "Medium Sexy" Caliber WinfieldOctober 31, 2012 at 8:49 AM

    Because when I hate something, I learn it. Know your enemy

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  45. "Medium Sexy" Caliber WinfieldOctober 31, 2012 at 8:51 AM

    Agreeing with me once is a gate-way. Before you know it, we'll be besties...

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  46. You clearly don't even watch the show as so many things you wrote is wrong. Ignoramus.

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  47. I only watch three sitcoms. Community, himym and bbt. Big bang theory is the most 'standard' of all of them but still has very funny moments. It's no F Troop, but what is?

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  48. I was in attendance at this show and had a pretty good time overall.* I was one of the people cheering Batista's heel turn not b/c it was the cool smark thing to do, but b/c it was actually interesting, well-done, and a significant one.

    When D-X came out, their pyro only went off once instead of the usual 4 times, and HHH looked around and held his index finger up and was like, "What the... only one?"
    I've actually been to two iron man matches in Pgh (the other being Benoit/HHH from a 2004 Raw where Benoit defended the WWE title), and the secret to getting through an iron man match as a viewer is simply to pace yourself. I literally just sat back and waited... to see how it played out. I honestly don't remember being bored at all during it, b/c unlike iron man matches like Benoit/HHH, HHH/Rock, Angle/Lesnar, I realized that there would be some fluff in there (like all the stuff with the pyro), so you kind of prepare yourself for the slow times.

    * When we got to the arena, they failed to open the entrance we were at on time, and when we got to the ticket checkers, we were told that two of our tix had been re-assigned (we had nose-bleeds). Of course with my luck I was holding one of them, so my friend and I had to race all the way around the arena to the box office to get switched out (it turns out that close to show day a camera had been set up in our seats, for the long shot they sometimes do of Cena entering the ring). Our new seats were literally behind the mixing board in the stands but close to the floor, but we had a giant piece of equipment in front of us that blocked a good chunk of the ring. We'd already missed the dark match b/c of having to run around, and now we had this obstruction?! Luckily the seats in front and off to the side never filled up, so some time during the Divas' match, we moved and had a clear view. But up till that point we were really annoyed. Smooth sailing from then on, though. And we got moved to the side with the hard camera, which I love b/c I hate watching interviews (and heel turns!) with their backs to me.


    And I called the arena and bitched about being split up (legit concern I threw at them: what if it was a parent for 3 children who got split?), all the hassles, etc., and they comped me 4 tix to the next WWE event there which was Raw the next spring (while the 1st season of NXT was still going)... and also the last ever wrestling even in Civic Arena's (RIP) storied history (not just wrestling... Elvis played one of his last shows there, I believe, and Neil Peart from Rush played his 1st ever show with the band there). That was also the Raw where the night before I ran into Daniel Bryan, Justin Gabriel, Wade Barrett, Michael Tarver, and maybe David Otunga (dude had a hoodie up and all of the guys were doing their own thing) at a gas station the night before. Tarver was checking out candy. I talked to Bryan for a moment about it being the last wrestling show at the arena.

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  49. I loved how in the lead up to this show Kofi simply dropped his accent, and whoever was with him backstage (it was on Raw... HHH?) was like, "Wait, didn't you used to be Jamaican?" and Kofi had this "oh shit, busted!" look on his face.


    I also remember there being a lot of anticipation for the Miz/Morrison match since they'd split on the draft episode (Miz turned on Morrison), and given that they were such an awesome tag team, people expected big things from the match/feud.

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  50. its true... me and Cal are facebook friends 4 LIFE

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  51. I said Penny was decent.


    Wanna fight about it?

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  52. ...and then turned into marty "the joke"

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  53. but for some, me included, it automatically makes them less funny. because the laughing is annoying to me.

    and I agree with Caliber about none of the characters being likeable. some of my friends are really into TBBT so I decided to give it a try. got the season one dvd but decided not to continue after I finished it (I got more and more bored with the season from episode to episode).

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  54. does "today" mean "currently on air"?

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  55. If you guys want to watch a funny sitcom, check out Happy Endings. It has one of the Wayans Bros. sons and Jack Bauer's daughter on it.

    Think of it as Friends Season 11 if it started out with Ross being left at the alter by Rachel.Oh, and the characters are much more likable. Also, the show might have the least stereotypical guy character ever.



    As for the PPV, was this the blowoff match where the announcers and John Cena kept calling this the greatest feud in WWE History?

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  56. If it's good for business, then hell yeah, let's shoot, brother.

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  57. I just watch it for the women, I'm a big fan of Bernadette in particular. Though I do find Sheldon's "I'm just gonna say what's on my mind and if you don't like it, too bad" attitude pretty amusing. It's not that great though, to me the test of a good comedy is whether or not you can watch episodes over and over and still find them funny. I think it failed that test.


    Sidenote: has Danica McKeena or whatever her name is from the Wonder Years ever been on that show? If not, she should be. Not only is she pretty hot but she's actually a legit genius, not just someone who plays one on TV.

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  58. Don't forget Denise the tom-boy intern from Season 8 of Scrubs

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  59. Stewie isn't a Mr. Burns ripoff, either.

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  60. The pyro board: The stupidest spot of all time or just a really stupid spot that happened at some point in time? I'm leaning toward the former. I'm not sure why, but I literally hate that match. I honestly never say stuff like this, but I felt dumber for having seen it.

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  61. How did Neidhart dodge that bullet? He was far less successful than Jannetty. Maybe it's because, Jannetty demonstrated some potential, which he threw away, while Neidhart was so quickly overlooked that he never even got a break-up feud with Bret.

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  62. Damn, I knew she looked familiar!

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  63. I like your huge rant about a laugh track when they don't even use a laugh track. Ignoramus.

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  64. Also if your a Community fan she was Abed's secret service love interest

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  65. Never saw the match, but when I first read the recap and got up to that part I got a sick feeling in my stomach and a voice in the back of my head started whispering, "maybe it's time to stop watching this shit...."

    2009 was a bummer of a wrestling year for me, Raw had become unwatchable due to the never-ending Orton/Cena feud and celebrity guest GM's. I was loving Smackdown with CM Punk's initial rise to the top & feud with Jeff Hardy...which was promptly squished by Undertaker resurfacing and snatching the strap away from Punk. Then I read Orton tried to make Cena explode in the middle of a serious 1-hour wrestling match.

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  66. Easy, b/c Bret & Neidhart never feuded. Shawn Michaels handily beat Marty Jannetty in their feud--hell The Rockers broke up b/c Shawn thought Marty was a loser & threw him thru the Barber Shop window. The Hart Foundation quietly ended & Bret became a singles competitor. He never claimed Neidhart held him back or that he carried Neidhart, and Neidhart never tried to futilely catch up to Bret.

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  67. Give Season 9 of The Office a shot. It's the last season so it's got that air of finality to it. Plus Greg Daniels has returned as show-runner, and it is much more focused and story-driven.

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  68. Since it's being discussed below, and since I'm a TV junkie, here are a list of sit-coms currently on TV that are better than TBBT

    -Community (returns Feb)
    -Parks & Recreation
    -30 Rock
    -The Office
    -It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
    -Girls (not sure when it comes back)
    -Curb Your Enthusiasm (not sure when it comes back)
    -Louie (returns 2014)
    -Archer
    -Bob's Burgers
    -Modern Family (not my favorite but better than TBBT)
    -Happy Endings
    -Raising Hope
    -The Mindy Project (too new to really judge, but its got potential)

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  69. Kaley Cucuouoouououou isn't that hot and not that funny. She's attractive, sure, but she's certainly no Christina Applegate in "Married With Children" in either category.

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  70. They use both. I've been to a taping of an ep and there were spots with laughter where the crowd didn't have the Pavlovian response during filming.

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  71. At the time. It was weird that Charles Robinson would get name-dropped his whole career on commentary then all of a sudden Cole would be like, "Here comes that referee!"

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  72. I forgot about Kofi. Everyone should just forget Kofi.

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  73. You completely agree with Caliber Winfield. Think about that for a second.

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  74. That's almost the exact opposite of the purpose of the show and what actually happens in the show. This is like listening to Billy Madison ad lib his way through the meaning of "the puppy that lost its way."


    I now feel dumber for having read it.

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  75. All things considered, blading is one of the safer things you can do in a wrestling ring. I'd rather gig my forehead than take a flat back bump. If they were really concerned about safety, they'd get rid of TLC and all the other car-crash matches.

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  76. Reading through this list, I realize what a sad state sit-coms are in. Philadelphia seems to be making a comeback after a few hit-and-miss seasons. The Office is making a mini-comeback despite being pretty darn awful the last two seasons (besides the Threat Level Midnight episode). So, we could put a couple of asterisks by them.



    Parks and Rec--damn good. Girls--pretty good as well. Modern Family--really good but people will dog on it because it's too "safe" a comedy. Community--the most underrated of the bunch, completely unafraid to experiment. Archer is enjoyable when I watch it, but I don't go out of my way to find it.



    The rest... meh. I've given each show at least two chances and have been underwhelmed. Also, I'm an independent or a moderate, and some of those shows want to shove liberalism so far down my throat that I start pooping green (looking at you Louie and 30 Rock). South Park plays it just right and targets every political group and religion--it's all inclusive.



    No one here seems to enjoy the "regular" sitcoms where they have an audience and just try to be funny. But I guess that's just the changing of the times. I dug shows like the Cosby Show, Cheers, Seinfeld, Coach, Raymond... I have a feeling these shows would be trashed today. Much like BBT.

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  77. That "New Golden-Age of Television" has definitely ended. I don't know about a sad state, as there's still some damn good stuff on the air, it's just that less new good stuff is being made (though I am a full-on liberal so I don't have the same complaints you do.) I think that regular is a relative word in that Always Sunny might be single camera, but it's essentially a standard sit-com following normal conventions and tropes.

    "No one here seems to enjoy the "regular" sitcoms where they have an
    audience and just try to be funny. But I guess that's just the changing
    of the times. I dug shows like the Cosby Show, Cheers, Seinfeld,
    Coach, Raymond... I have a feeling these shows would be trashed today.
    Much like BBT."

    I'll have you know you are wrong about this (but in a way that should hopefully relieve you). Thanks to Netflix a lot of older shows are getting second lives from younger people. Seinfeld is still greatly popular, the the point that its STILL discussed on the AV Club, and holds up a bit better than several of the shows I listed. I'm 28 years old, and I just started watching Cheers on Netflix, and find it to feel fresh and relevant as I fell in love with Sam and Diane. I think the key is if you write progressively for yor day (as Seinfeld & Cheers did) you won't feel all too dated in the future.

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  78. I never saw the big deal about a laugh track or shooting single camera. I love the sitcom medium itself, as long as it's funny.


    Caliber freaking out over it is funny. I wonder if cracked.com said the same thing.

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  79. Right on. I don't even call it by its proper name--to me it's the "Big Lame Theory". I haven't been trying very hard lately.

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  80. I figured they've had her on at least once. Now that I think about, isn't the girl that used to play Blossom (no idea how to spell her name) pretty smart too?

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  81. Not the greatest sitcom in the world,. but I found it to be entertaining crap for the first few seasons, but then the show went downhill imo when they introduced Bernie and Blossom as mainstay characters.

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  82. Yeah I don't get the "shoving liberalism down my throat" thing either, though I drive a Prius so.... I have a mucho conservative friend at work who finds liberal undertones in every movie and TV show that I don't see, but I don't listen and watch political shows all day that angry up the blood.

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  83. I don't know if anyone has changed me opinion of them so much with a turn as Batista did with his heel turn.


    I hated the guy. I wrote him off as someone I would never been interested in again and just wanted to go away. His run on Raw was unbearable and he was one of those guys they had to make look strong at all times, which is always annoying when you've been tired of them for years.


    But that heel turn. Great stuff. Complete changed his character. It's too bad they only did it for his exit angle - I could have lived with Raw being "about" dickhead Batista for a good year, at least.

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  84. Especially since they're used so often, with such little meaning most times. Put me in a big match at Wrestlemania and I'll fall off a 20 foot ladder through a table to the floor and hope for the best....I'd have trouble gearing up to do it on a throwaway show in December just because it's that time of year again.

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  85. PENNY IS MORE THAN DECENT!!! SHES PERFECT!!!


    Wait, which Penny are you talking about? Big Bang Theory or Happy Endings?

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  86. PhD in neuroscience and another degree in Jewish studies I think.


    She's been on the show too, I think.

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  87. NOT PENNY'S SHOW

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  88. I don't Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart are as easily comparable as Shawn Michaels and Marty Jannety.


    Neidhart was alot bigger than Bret, and a different kind of wrestler.

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  89. team zanadude's assOctober 31, 2012 at 5:48 PM

    Some guys just seem to do their best work when they can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Jake Roberts, Diesel, Batista. Maybe it's because they're all natural showman, following the shoman's mantra: always leave them wanting more.

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  90. team zanadude's assOctober 31, 2012 at 5:49 PM

    You have the order backwards. He was outed by DX ("Aren't you really from Ghana?"), THEN he dropped the accent.

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  91. team zanadude's assOctober 31, 2012 at 5:50 PM

    Well, it's usually the heel that screws over the face and goes on to greatness. Neidhart never really screwed over Bret, and he certainly never went on to greatness.

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  92. Thinking about what happened to Dave Finlay I'd say it's safer than going through a table.

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  93. I thought it was something like that. She's a regular character, Sheldon's girlfriend, sort of.

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  94. I don't care what anyone says, THAT still is one of the most emotional scenes ever. And it was all downhill from there.

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  95. She's currently Sheldon's girlfriend on the show. They do make a Blossom reference on this past week's episode when she and Sheldon try to find a couple's costume for Halloween.

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  96. Haters gonna hate. I like BBT and don't care what anyone else thinks.

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  97. Yeah, this.


    Michaels made Jannetty look like a chump, Bret never did that.

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  98. I can't stand Big Bang Theory, The Office, and most other oh-so-clever sitcoms, and whenever I watch the awesomeness that is Arrested Development, I'm reminded of why.

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  99. "Everyone loves to support a Team according to Stephanie!"


    Well, Steph was reported in dirtsheets as trying to recreate the Twilight fandom rivalry with Cena vs. Rock. I guess if she couldn't get the fan reaction, she'd just make everything else about the product like Twilight instead.

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  100. Jeff Hardy on his way out of WWE in 09?

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  101. ha, if you're gonna like one and hate everything else, you picked the right one

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  102. Didn't Jannetty have a match with The Miz a week prior to this show? I think that's what Scott was referring to in the review and he forgot about it three years later. Because I remember Jannetty was so hammered that he botched almost everything in that match, which likely explains why he hasn't been seen on WWE television again (They didn't even bring him back for RAW 1,000).

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  103. Which Warehouse 13 chick are you referring to, Joanne Kelly or Angela Scagliotti? Because they're both hot.

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  104. Blading is stupid, especially if the wrestlers involved can't do it right (Every CZW "wrestler" ever fits into that category).

    And that "never mention the ref's name unless it's a NXT scrub we need for a throwaway angle" rule is just as stupid as the rule where announcers must only call wrestlers by their full names.
    The only WWE ref I even recognize anymore is the guy who looks like Dave Chappelle. Funnily enough, I can recognize every TNA referee.

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  105. It was an actual quote:
    http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,20560589,00.html

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