The SmarK Rant for WWE Battleground 2013
This is for the reader who won the 20,000,000th pageview contest on the blog, and also because it coincides with this year’s version of the show. Plus part of me wanted to see if it was really the worst show of the year, because I’m funny that way. I didn’t watch the show and barely paid attention to the results, so this is all mostly fresh to me.
Live from Buffalo, NY
Your hosts are Michael Cole, JBL & Jerry Lawler
World Heavyweight title, Hardcore rules: Alberto Del Rio v. Rob Van Dam
I don’t even get the deal with RVD and Ricardo, as they broke up the Ricardo-Del Rio team, literally the only thing giving Del Rio any heat, and put him with someone who didn’t need a manager or extra heat. It did nothing for anyone involved and really made RVD look like kind of a goof for associating with Ricardo. Rob dumps ADR to start and drops the guillotine legdrop as I ponder the difference between a “hardcore” match and an “extreme rules” match. Probably copyright. Back in the ring, Rob DDTs him on a chair for two, but ADR gets the backstabber for two. Del Rio with some WEAK chairshots for two. I could live just fine without ever seeing anyone take a chair to the back again, but if you’re gonna do it, DO IT. ADR sets up the chair in the corner while we get a high-speed camera replay (hey, remember the month or so when they spent thousands on that thing and then used it a bunch to justify it?) but Rob spinkicks him and retrieves a ladder. Back in, RVD with a missile dropkick and ADR bumps off the ladder and out to the floor, and back in for two. Rob climbs the ladder in the corner, but Del Rio puts him down with an enzuigiri and gets two. He goes to work with the dreaded aluminum garbage can, but Rob kicks it back at him. Slow motion reveals how non-devastating that move really is. As a general rule, high speed replays of choreographed fighting kind of undermines the whole “suspension of disbelief” deal. Rob makes the comeback with a moonsault on the ladder for two. Rolling Thunder misses, however, and it’s armbreaker time. Ricardo breaks it up since it’s no-DQ, and Rob rolls Del Rio up for two. And then we get a weird sequence with Del Rio and Ricardo beating on each other to totally kill the flow of the match. Rob suddenly reappears with a frog splash off the apron, which gets two. Rob tries the Van Terminator, but misses after his ten minute setup routine. Del Rio drops him on the chair and superkicks him, then finishes with the armbreaker in the chair at 16:03. So yeah, quite the comeback for RVD, tapping to the heel’s finisher despite having all the advantages in the match. It was like a good Smackdown main event, but didn’t seem like a good fit for a PPV blowoff. ***
Meanwhile, the Real Americans rail against Mexicans and Canadians sneaking across the border.
The Great Khali & Santino v. The Real Americans
They seriously put this match on a show that people were paying for? Showing that the company totally misses the point of the hypocrisy behind the heel team, Santino and Khali are both legitimately foreigners, thus proving their point! The heel heat should have been from the “Real” Americans accusing two obviously American babyfaces of being immigrants. Santino tries a headlock on Swagger while the announcers are already losing interest in the match, and the cobra comes out early. Swagger runs away from it and Hornswoggle tries his own, but that goes nowhere and Santino is your clown-in-peril. This whole sequence was apparently supposed to be hilarious judging by the fake laughter from the announce team. Just in case you needed that clarified. See, a MIDGET had a smaller version of the cobra. And then Swagger just ignored him and stole the sock. Because he’s a midget and thus easily beat up. HILARIOUS. Mercifully we move to the hot tag and Khali pounds on Cesaro and the big chop gets two. Swagger and Santino fight on the floor, leaving Cesaro to Giant Swing the giant for the pin at 7:05. DUD
Did we mention that BREAST CANCER IS BAD? Because this is apparently news. Seriously, they’re already all wearing their stupid pink shirts and the Susan G. Komen scam has advertising all over the arena, do we really need PSAs in between the matches as well? How much was the foundation paying for this shameless self-promotion? When you’re basically sponsoring a show on the same level as Snickers or the new Modern Warfare game does, the high moral ground is kind of lost.
Intercontinental title: Curtis Axel v. R-Truth
Truth slugs away while Cole reminds us that Truth was once US champion four years ago and had a single title shot at Cena as well. Wow, what a pedigree. A clothesline puts Axel on the floor and Truth follows with a clothesline and he’s like “WHAT’S UP?” and the crowd is like “Eh, not much, just watching this shit PPV.” Axel runs him into the railing for two, which we get in SUPER EXPENSIVE HIGH FRAMERATE SLOW MOTION and they’re milk every cent out of that fucking camera system if it kills them. Did the Susan G. Komen foundation buy it for them or something? RISE ABOVE 30 FRAMES PER SECOND! So back in the ring, Axel goes to the chinlock and I’m sick of this match already as we get another fucking slow motion replay. How much more slow motion could a match be? It’s CURTIS AXEL. Are you gonna sell this camera thing on chinlocks at 1200 frames per second? Truth makes the comeback with a rollup for two and the axe kick for two. The crowd is more concerned with JBL than with Truth’s title chase. Can’t say as I blame them. God forbid this company ever figures out how to film in 3D because they’d probably shove that down our throats for a month, too. Axel finishes with the neckbreaker thingie at 7:40. Thankfully, not in SUPER SLO-MO. The match was slow motion by itself. *
Divas title: AJ Lee v. Brie Bella
Was this during the “Total Divas hate AJ” feud that everyone raved about to start but went nowhere? Brie chases AJ around and gets a dropkick for two as Cole points out the possibility of the engaged Brie and Daniel Bryan couple becoming dual champions tonight. Which is really weird because they acknowledge the real life and Total Divas continuity of Brie and Bryan, but Nikki Bella and John Cena exist in some bizarre parallel universe where they only know each other on the E! Network. Like apparently the fans are supposed to be the perfect balance of stupid to know about one relationship but not the other. AJ works on the arm a bit but she’s got nothing to work with here. Blind charge misses but AJ just keeps beating on the arm while Cole on commentary confirms that this was indeed after AJ gave the promo that was supposed to turn her into a mega-heel in the company’s eyes by insulting the Total Divas show that everyone apparently was supposed to love non-ironically. Brie makes the comeback while Tamina beats on Nikki, and this distraction allows AJ to get the rollup to retain at 6:44. So basically AJ told all the other Divas that they sucked and then proved that she was correct by beating them all and retaining her title for a record length of time. TELLING STORIES. ½*
The Shield v. Cody Rhodes & Goldust
The Rhodes family fights for their jobs as we finally get something worthwhile on this show. Cody chases the heels and they work on Reigns in the corner, so the Shield bails to regroup. Dusty UNDOES THE BELT and you know he means business but sadly no one is whipped like a dog if you will. Back in the ring, Cody gets beat up in the corner, but he comes back and stomps Rollins down in the corner. Rollins puts him down again Roman overpowers him for two, and I’m wondering why they didn’t just book it as a 3-on-2 match to really put the screws to the Rhodes family and give it real stakes. Rollins with a neckbreaker for two and Cody gets caught in the heel corner, but he comes back with a moonsault and it’s hot tag Goldust. He beats on Reigns in the corner and the crowd is totally into this one, and a flying bodypress gets two. Sadly, a bodypress misses and Goldust splats on the floor to begin his revived career as the greatest face-in-peril of the past decade. He actually manages to milk crowd sympathy out of a teased countout. Back in, the Shield goes to work and Rollins gets a senton for two as Goldust’s paint starts to come off and you can see the agony on his face start to develop. What a great touch that ended up being. Although the stupid pink gloves kind of kill the gravitas. He’s desperate to fight for his very job, but not so desperate that he can’t stop to honor the company-wide charity initiative of the month! Goldust comes back with a powerslam on Rollins and it’s hot tag Cody and he’s running wild. A spinning Alabama slam gets two on Rollins. Suplex gets two and it’s BREAKING LOOSE IN TULSA, as Cody hits Reigns with the disaster kick and dumps him, but Rollins lays him out from behind in a great spot. This match also was fascinating for myself as a fan of tag team wrestling, because no matter how you try to kill off tag teams, wrestling crowds collectively get the rhythms and twists of a great tag match without being taught. They know to get mad at the false finishes, clap along with the face-in-peril to inspire him to make the tag, and know that the hot tag is setting up the climax of the match and turn up their response accordingly. On the floor, Dusty finally pays off the belt spot and lays out Ambrose to the delight of the crowd. In the ring, Crossroads finishes at 13:52 for the giant pop. Clearly the best thing on the show. ***3/4 Sadly their tag title reign later would prove to be a giant waste for all involved.
Kofi Kingston v. Bray Wyatt
Bray misses a couple of charges, but manages to lay him out in the corner and pounds him down for two. I should note that it was around this time that the Wyatt-Cena Wrestlemania rumors started and most people were like “WTF?” And then they actually managed to build him up before having him lose all the matches and drop back down the card again. So, job well done, I guess. Bray drops an elbow for two as the crowd has already given up on the match and started chanting for random people. Kofi fights out of a chinlock and gets a crucifix for two. But where’s the super slo-mo replay? The wacky kick misses and Bray lays him out for the CRABWALK OF DOOM. Kofi comes back with a dive onto all three guys and goes up with a flying bodypress for two, but Bray catches him with Sister Abagail at 8:20. This really needed to be Bray squashing the shit out of Kofi at this point and just ended up being too long for what they were trying to accomplish. **
CM Punk v. Ryback
This was so clearly a setup for their Cell match two weeks later that I don’t even know why they bothered going through the motions of actually having a match. Punk kicks Ryback’s legs out and he bails to escape, so Punk hits him with a dive and sends him into the post. Back in, a flying bodypress gets two. Ryback comes back with a press slam and runs Punk into the post to take over and we hit the chinlock. Ryback with an overhead suplex for two. Who was the ad wizard that came up with this feud? “Hey, let’s book a series of matches where Ryback has to be on offense for long stretches of time against a guy who’s already beat up and unmotivated! WE’LL MAKE MILLIONS!” Ryback suplexes him on the top rope and pounds away for two. And back to the chinlock. Punk makes a comeback, so Heyman stops to cut a promo and Punk stands like a moron while Ryback attacks from behind. Powerbomb gets two. Why not just do a rollup like everyone else in the past 10 years? Another powerbomb is reversed to a sloppy high kick, thus CREATING SEPARATION, and the Macho Elbow gets two. Punk throws knees in the corner and takes him down with a rana, but Ryback gets a powerslam for two. Heyman gets caught with a kendo stick, so Punk kicks Ryback in the nuts and pins him at 15:00 while the ref is distracted. THAT was the finish they came up with? I could have spilled a bowl of Alpha-Bits on the floor and swept up random letters that would form a better finish than that. And this somehow necessitated a Hell in the Cell rematch at the next show. Punk was clearly beat up and in need of a break, basically doing nothing here and the result was a boring match. **
Meanwhile, the panel of “experts” (The Miz, Tensai and Titus O’Neil…no really) make their picks for the main event. One thing they know for sure is that we will absolutely have a champion after tonight.
WWE title: Abeyance v. Daniel Bryan v. Randy Orton
This was the one after Bryan thought he had won the title but had it ripped away from by the establishment. Oh, and the Authority has no confidence in Randy Orton and thinks they need a new face of the company. In case you needed help narrowing down which match this one was. Orton works the headlock to start, but Bryan goes after the arm, so Orton puts him down with the neckbreaker for two. Bryan comes back with the kicks in the corner and goes to work on the knee with an indian deathlock, but Orton clotheslines from the top for two. Orton pounds away in the corner and even the announcers are like “Yeah, he’s really slowing the pace down here.” Bryan makes his comeback and puts Orton on the floor with a headscissors before following with a dive and a dropkick into the railing. Back in, he tries a flying something and gets caught with a powerbomb for two. Orton with a Boston crab, which is an oddly random choice on his part, but Bryan cradles for two. They head to the floor and Orton sends him into the post to take over again as the match just keeps meandering back and forth. Orton with a superplex for two as we finally get the super-expensive slo-mo replay that the viewing public had literally been demanding since the R-Truth match. RETURN ON INVESTMENT. If people who work with me are reading this, they’ll know why that’s funny. Bryan comes back with a backslide for two, but Orton suplexes him to the floor. They brawl by the tables and Bryan gets the better of that and follows with a dive from the top rope. Back in, flying headbutt gets two. Man, how much longer would his career (to date) have been if he had just phased that move out years ago? Bryan with dropkicks in the corner for the big comeback, but Orton suplexes him on his bad shoulder. Bryan blocks the RKO and hooks the Yes-Lock, but Big Show does the run-in and bumps the ref for some reason. This would I guess count as the finish at 22:00. This was every other Bryan v. Orton match you’ve ever seen in your life. *** And then Show knocks out both Bryan and Orton and we continue to have no champion. And that was the end of the show that people paid $60 to see in the days before the Network! See, because Bryan was considered to be the sideshow and people were supposed to get behind Big Show as the new face of the company and top babyface who avenged himself on Orton and then faced HHH at TLC to draw millions. No, really.
The Pulse
Not quite as infuriating a show as it was at the time, now it’s more of an incredibly boring curiosity than anything. Unfortunately the passion and greatness of the Rhodes match has also been flattened out by time and perspective for me and that basically kills the whole show for me overall now. Definitely I’d call this the worst WWE PPV of 2013, no doubt.
Oh... I gotcha. 'Round here "Nitro party" means something totally different.
ReplyDeleteYou pick up a cracker and some whippets?
ReplyDeleteSmokin' hella weed though. Hella.
ReplyDeleteOrton and Bryan never had the quality of matches on PPV that they did on TV. Probably because their matches on TV just allowed them to go out there and perform while their PPV matches seemed bogged down with extra crap. Shame too because they've had some great TV matches.
ReplyDeleteI get shit good enough where I only have to smoke minuscule amounts, 2 good hits and you're set for about 4 hours.
ReplyDeleteAs I'be said, there's nothing to do here but get fucked up, so we do NOT fuck around.
"See, because Bryan was considered to be the sideshow and people were supposed to get behind Big Show as the new face of the company and top babyface who avenged himself on Orton and then faced HHH at TLC to draw millions. No, really."
ReplyDeleteNo. Really.
You know what, I don't think I care for Steven Regals ring work. Or his character. I've been seeing so much of him on the network and I just keep waiting to see him do anything awesome.
ReplyDeleteI just ate a 4 pack of weed jolly ranchers and drank a "five hour energy" so I could stay up late and watch 1994 wcw on the network lol
ReplyDeleteI'm smoking weed, drinking coffee and watching 1998 WCW on youtube.
ReplyDeleteMick foley was a woman in his past life and Daniel Bryan was his abusive son...AJ Lee tried to stop Bryan from abusing Mick..Undertaker and Mick met during the first Olympics.........dumbest story ever!
ReplyDeleteAre you talking just Steven Regal in WCW or Regal's work across the board, including when he was in WWE?
ReplyDeleteI always thought Van Hammer was underrated.He shouldve had at least 1 World Title run in WCW
ReplyDeleteHe doesn't have to do anything awesome. He's already Steve Regal.
ReplyDeleteI dunno I dig Regal.
Early 90's wcw and early 00's wwf
ReplyDeleteI've never gotten the love he gets. Certainly he's had some great moments and some good matches but I've never much cared for him outside of his run as commissioner in 2001.
ReplyDeleteFor some reason I'm not liking his matches. Just watched his match with Pillman at spring stampede 94 and its actually not very good
ReplyDeleteHaving not watched too much of that era of WCW, I normally project my opinion of William Regal onto Steven Regal when watching, and I'm fine with it.
ReplyDeleteFor the most part, though, he is an acquired taste, and it probably helps if you were watching him live at the time. Like, people will look at Piper promos from the 80s and think he's overrated or watch Flair-Steamboat matches and think of them as overrated. Personally, I think the Piper opinion is more blasphemous.
More likely than not, you're really aided by being there at the time. But for me, I bought Regal's act completely after a while.
So yeah wwe network might be my favorite thing ever.
ReplyDeleteThis and the 2/15 Nitro basically triggered WCW's ratings plunge and descent into irrelevance. Everybody realized it was just gonna be all nWo all the time, flipped to WWF, and never looked back.
ReplyDeleteClash of styles, big time. I think Pillman was made for WWE's style. It's a shame and a half that he only had one working ankle by the time he arrived.
ReplyDeleteYouTube had the full WWF challenge seasons of 1984 and 1985 which I watched awhile ago and pipers stuff holds up incredibly well even by today's standards. Prime piper was 20 years ahead of his time on the mic. Cm punk is probably the closet thing today to what piper was on the mic
ReplyDeleteI'm curious as to which portion of that you feel is an unfair assessment of the situation at the time.
ReplyDeleteIf Randy Orton retired and I never had to see him wrestle ever again that'd be cool.
ReplyDeleteStrictly amateur hour trolling. Not even worth the time to ban hammer it.
ReplyDeleteHe's so... bland.
ReplyDeleteOh, I forgot. No one is allowed to doubt the almighty Wrestling God Dave Meltzer here.
ReplyDeleteNobody, myself included, is saying there was one and only one plan from August 2013 to April 2014, but if you believe HHH/Show was supposed to be anything, at any time, more than a placeholder while creative pulled their shit together, you're a dumb-dumb, plain and simple.
I think a full fledged Pillman vs Austin fued would've been great if Pillman would've never had that horrible car accident
ReplyDeleteThat's no way to talk about our true wrestling god! You have let your family down and brought shame on us all. Now go renew your subscription to the Observer before Dave smites you with a thunderbolt from his arse.
ReplyDelete[bows in respect to a pile of Observer back issues]
ReplyDeleteAh, you're a Bryan truther. Carry on then.
ReplyDelete:)...its an honor to have 'The Man' Scott Keith , respond to my comment . Love your site!
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of conspiracies, has a date been set for Punk's return from his sabbatical?
ReplyDeleteSee if you're still happy once he forwards you the bill.
ReplyDeleteYea its the same day Sting is going to wrestle in his WWE debut
ReplyDeleteIt wouldn't be the first time... my credit isnt good here?
ReplyDeleteThat depends. Is your name Caliber Winfield?
ReplyDeleteNope. My name is pik I used to post here a lot a few months back but I had to stop.. I heard about Officer Farva passing away, my condolences to his friends and family#noTroll ....we had some funny conversations and he always had funny responses to my trolling efforts
ReplyDeleteI remember watching this lame ppv. Shield vs The Rhodes Brothers was the only good match
ReplyDeleteThe Houston Rockets have disappointed me in free agency.. no major acquisitions besides Aries who always slacks off when it isnt a contract year... Rockets shouldve never let Parson become a restricted free agent because this years free agent class was weak..Rockets need to make some trades.
ReplyDelete>. Punk was clearly beat up and in need of a break,
ReplyDeleteHe had just had a break!
The scripted era of WWE is annoying. I don't want fans to be right when they say they can book better cards than WWE.
ReplyDeleteSaturn/Raven vs Benoit/Malenko at Spring Stampede in '99 was awesome. WCW could've got more mileage out of a Saturn/Raven tag team.
ReplyDeleteWatching Goldberg fuck around for months, knowing that Nash always claimed that his injury fucked up the angle where he'd get revenge against the nWo is really funny.
ReplyDeleteAnd yup, Rey unmasking on a show where the heels dominate everything. Because WCW.
"Punk was clearly beat up and in need of a break, basically doing nothing here and the result was a boring match."
ReplyDeleteReason #624,271 why CM Punk is not coming back: After noting that his body is clearly breaking down and in need of rest, they decided to book him in an extended feud against Ryback, less than a year after he hurt Punk legit because of his own sloppiness.
Must have been a helluva year if the worst show had three three star matches.
ReplyDeleteWelcome to BoD weekends. It's a new One Troll Wonder every Sat. night!
ReplyDeleteShield/Rhodeses wound up winning MOTY, I believe, which makes sacrificing the Rhodes Boys to the New Age Outlaws that much more baffling. (Well, until you remember who the Outlaws are friends with, of course.)
ReplyDeleteHe took off one month when he clearly needed like 6. It's definitely partly his own fault, but I'm sure they didn't want him to either.
ReplyDeleteABEYANCE WINS! ABEYANCE WINS! BY GAWD, ABEYANCE WINS!
ReplyDeleteHis first DVD has Rey going to Mexico unmasked and they have to blur out his face because apparently he would be murdered if he was caught wearing it there
ReplyDeleteNot only did it get a 1.1 buyrate, it BEAT St. Valentine's Day Massacre which featured the first Austin/McMahon blowoff match!
ReplyDeleteRVD/Del Rio getting *** is surprising, because I remember that match being about as fun as watching paint dry or listening to Fandango on commentary.
ReplyDeleteExpecting fans to cheer for the Divas on Total Divas (aka the bitchiest bitches who have ever bitched) is yet more evidence that Kevin Dunn is a totally incompetent idiot.
ReplyDeleteAnd you just know that the eventual plan is to give Cameron the title and have her feud with the returning Brie Bella. It's inevitable.
ReplyDeleteNot just bland but when I look at him I'm like "Really....those tattoos and ring attire....do you know what year it is?" Randy sucks. Instant interest killer. They should have just released him after the umpteenth drug violation. I'm sorry, he has no talent, at all.
ReplyDeleteThat entire "nostalgia" run for the Outlaws was ridiculous.
ReplyDeleteOrton is one of those guys they should just pay to stay home for a year. He's overexposed like Cena is and it would be nice to just have a year without him.
ReplyDeleteHe always had good entrance music if nothing else.
ReplyDeleteAs I've stated before, THIS is the show that killed WCW. Not the Fingerpoke, not Starrcade 97, not Starrcade 98, this show. Let's look at the reasons:
ReplyDelete- Tag Title Match: You have two fan favorites in Benoit and Malenko who had never reached the top, and in Benoit's case, had never even held a title in WCW in four years. So what do you do? Book them to lose to two old geezers that nobody in their right minds would possibly want to see wrestle in the year 1999!
- Rey losing his mask: Rey was one of the hottest stars in the company and it was great to finally see him actually feuding with some big names and getting out of the doldrums of the Cruiserweight division. This was a storyline that actually made sense too! So of course let's make him look like a pussy and have him lose his mask, because as everyone else has pointed out, masks aren't profitable as merchandise.
- Goldberg vs. Bigelow: Your top face is wrestling a midcarder... why? This is barely a B-PPV main event, hell it's barely a Thunder main event. This shitfest should have been blown off in November when the feud actually started, instead of having Goldberg do literally nothing at World War 3. Or even a Nitro before Starrcade to build up Goldberg against Nash. Heaven forbid we actually push somebody.
- Hogan over Flair: You have the company's second biggest babyface who has a ton of legit heat with the company despite doing a mind blowing job at Starrcade, along with a hot angle of the top heel beating up the face's son. So of course Hogan goes over after Lil' Flair turns heel! Again, who would possibly want to see that on TV? To make matters worse, the next month they decide to do a double turn that made absolutely zero sense.
I'm writing a novel here and most of the points have already been covered, but fick this show and fuck WCW for giving us this shit. Sometimes I wonder why they had to go and die and then I remember shit like this and go "oh yeah, right"
This is more like the ending to that level in Star Fox 64 where the train tracks get switched and the train drives into a military armory full of live ammunition and bombs
ReplyDeleteShow was supposed to be built up to fight HHH at TLC? Did they just change their minds because he wasn't doing as well with crowds/ratings as they'd hoped or something?
ReplyDeleteAbeyance was getting the FUCK pushed out of him during this time period, but of course they went and ignored him before too long. Stupid WWE can't push ANYONE who isn't Cena for a consistent period of time!
ReplyDeleteGOD YES. They pretty much got X-Pac Heat, the crowds shit all over them, and they killed one of the hottest acts in the company in record time, just so they could hold the belts for a while and transition to the midcard Usos.
ReplyDeletePlus hasn't Bischoff gone on record saying Goldberg was supposed to be a shot at Ken Shamrock?
ReplyDeleteIt's so funny, because he's one of those guys that everyone IN the business just seems to absolutely worship, in terms of talent. Guys LOVE him. I wonder if it's some kind of timing/crowd psychology thing; one of those things that's hard to understand if you're not an actual worker.
ReplyDeleteAbeyance was poised to be a two-time champion again, until John Cena came in and played politics to get himself that title run, instead. I think this should be the subject of the next Jesse Baker email.
ReplyDeleteThey were definitely building up to it and you could tell by the finish to the Show/Orton Survivor Series main event. But that main event was such a disaster, they quickly pulled the plug on Show on a top babyface.
ReplyDeleteWas it a shitty match or something? I DID definitely notice that Show went from one of the most over guys on the card with a fairly fascinating gimmick, to basically being Just Some Guy standing around doing nothing (see Henry, Mark).
ReplyDeleteIt was pretty awful, because it was the perfect storm of Randy Orton as the heel champion nobody wanted and Big Show as the babyfaced avenger nobody wanted, so there was either pure silence or chants for Daniel Bryan.
ReplyDeleteReminds me of Vince Russo's style of booking where if he just let wrestlers go out there and have a straight wrestling match without any convoluted crap, he could have produced a lot more good shows.
ReplyDeletegood to see my buddy abeyance get his main event spotlight
ReplyDeleteIt WAS pretty awful how Big Show would start leading the audience in "YES!" chants. It literally felt like they were trying to see if they could co-opt that chant as a generic babyface cheer, so they wouldn't be able to hijack things for Bryan.
ReplyDeleteI'm not surprised. I don't think King of the Ring 99 did a great buyrate either (I could be wrong). Something about Austin v. McMahon on PPV that wasn't actually a draw (relatively speaking).
ReplyDeleteI remember the first really bad sign that fans were getting tired of WCW more than just on TV -- it was when the advance ticket sales came back in April for Slamboree the next month.
ReplyDeleteThe TWA Dome Nitro in December did over 18,000 tickets and $600k on the first day of sales and then the Slamboree PPV in the same building did 8,000 and $313k in the first *week* of sales. Not bad numbers or anything for sure, but definitely the first real apparent major drop off at the box office and the first time where it appeared they wouldn't be able to continue growing alongside the WWF. That was after a very hot Feburary/March too -- doing huge ticket sales in weak west coast markets for Superbrawl and Spring Stampede and then almost 20k tickets in a half hour for the Toronto Nitro.
Wasn't the nuts finish a callback to their HIAC match?
ReplyDeleteI think they really missed the boat on making orton a badass face like stone cold who didn't want any friends and would turn on other faces and heels. Seems like when shaemus got over and turned face wwe completely changed what fans liked about him too. At least they didn't screw cm punk when he got over as fuck after the pipebomb.......... o yea that's right they DID IT AGAIN. But the mcmahons are all creative geniuses so im sure the inability to make new stars or get new ppl to watch and boost ratings or to make wwe entertaining to watch anymore is the talents fault
ReplyDeleteI've been a huge Orton fan for about 10 years. But they need to freshen his character up. They need to decide what direction they are gonna go with him and commit to it. That goes for most of the roster.
ReplyDelete"So basically AJ told all the other Divas that they sucked and then proved that she was correct by beating them all and retaining her title for a record length of time. TELLING STORIES. "
ReplyDeleteWell, that was the story I wanted to hear.
Huh? He's had a WWE World title reign this year, and he's the reigning Intercontinental champion.
ReplyDeleteI missed most of the authority angle but from the results I've seen, they really missed a chance to make a lot of young talents. Aside from Daniel Bryan, they could have made Ziggler, Cody and any other young talent by having them oppose the Authority. I saw the Battleground match with the Rhodes and it's clear the fans were hot for them. Imagine getting Ziggler involved as well.
ReplyDeletecuppa coffee in the bigtime yeah
ReplyDeleteYou have to watch his matches with Benoit and Finlay etc. and work your way down from there.
ReplyDeleteAlso really... his matches have got to be like, 15 mins minimum for them to really make sense.
PLEASE. The IC Title is completely devalued, and that was a transitional Title reign at best- Abeyance only got it because of Bryan's injury, rendering it a totally illegitimate reign!
ReplyDeletemore like dumbest commenter ever
ReplyDeleteWasn't suppose to be a shot. It was how Bischoff felt WWF should have booked Shamrock and I agree with him.
ReplyDeleteDusty should have never put his hand up to Steph's face during that promo on RAW. They gave us hope with his boys and then jobbed them out to the Outlaws.
ReplyDeleteTony yelling "Oh hell yeah!" when Goldberg jacknifed Hogan for the title didn't help.
ReplyDeleteHogan was in booking meetings with Bischoff, Nash and everyone else. He absolutely had control over who he was programmed with.
ReplyDeleteNot only the Flair heel turn but all the turns over the next couple of months, for me, really did a great job killing interest in WCW. Hogan turns without any actual redemption, Flair turns for no reason, Page finally wins the world title then immediately turns heel, Nash turns face just months after screwing Goldberg and the fans are expected to cheer his title chase not long after he literally gave the title away, Savage returns as a face then turns heel immediately... I'm sure there's more, but how was anyone supposed to follow this? There was nobody to get behind.
ReplyDeleteThat Cena Wyatt cage match pissed me off so much. Cena dominated all three guys and loses in a glorified version of the distraction roll up. They really neutered Wyatt with that feud.
ReplyDeleteIt's not a devaluation of Abeyance. It's an elevation of the IC Title.
ReplyDeleteIf you like AJ.
ReplyDeleteDitto. (And I'm doing it in the same teary eyed but ultimately happy way demi does it in ghost)
ReplyDeleteSurvivor Series 2013 nearly stole the "Worst PPV of 2013" crown away from this turd, but yeah, I'd have to agree that this was the low point last year. I
ReplyDeleteI don't remember any of this sans The Rhodes Brothers. It was good to see snarky Scott again. We missed you brother!
ReplyDeleteForgot all about this. What a shitty time to be watching
ReplyDeleteSo Scott Keith thinks breast cancer charities are scams? No wonder he murdered his kid in that hot car in atlanta
ReplyDeleteThis! Was there any resolution to the whole "face of the company" thing? Seems strange to get dissed like that and then join Evolution like nothing ever happened
ReplyDeleteYeah and what the fuck is up with Lebron not going to the Celtics.
ReplyDeleteThey also opened 2014 with a pretty big turdburger in the Rumble, but have been getting better from there.
ReplyDeleteThe wrestling is never really that bad on WWE ppv's. I think it's been awhile since something hit the negatives. The booking is just so bad that it drags it all down.
ReplyDelete(Unchained Melody playing in the background, as Orton walks out of the ring for the last time)
ReplyDeleteIs it wrong that I read this in Iron Shiek's voice?
ReplyDeleteSusan G. Komen is pretty much a scam.
ReplyDeleteHe was offering suggestions of course but he didn't have the final say.
ReplyDeleteEven if he didn't do the hand, I think the angle would have pretty much happened the same way.
ReplyDeleteHey those hardworking executives deserve their 6-7 figure incomes.
ReplyDeleteYup!
ReplyDeleteBut how do you freshen randy up? Heel or face, he's pretty much the same guy.
ReplyDeleteMurdered his kid in a hot car in Atlanta? What the hell are you talking about?
ReplyDeleteEh, I don't know. This wasn't Scott at his snarkiest. Needed more hot pokers or Shane McMahon paying him off.
ReplyDeleteThe Rumble was an awesome PPV.
ReplyDeleteAdorable.
ReplyDeleteThere are some very dedicated breast cancer charities that do a lot of good work towards treatment, research and assistance. Komen is NOT one of them. Less than 20 percent (maybe even less than 10-15) of money donated goes to research and the rest goes into the pockets of executives. They also have sued over charities for using the words "for the cure" - not as a full on slogan like they do, but in-text literature.
ReplyDeleteSusan Koman is NOT one of the good ones. I fully support Mr. Keith's venom.
Really the only appropriate way to do it.
ReplyDeleteThe guy who left his kid in a car a couple weeks ago looked like Scott.
ReplyDeleteWhen I got the network, the Rhodes vs Shield match rom this show was one of the first matches I wanted to see. It was a great tag match and I am still annoyed at how little the wwe did with the Rhodes Brothers after October 2013 as they were the best act in the company at that time.
ReplyDeleteDidn't Abeyance get the world title back when Bryan gave it up just after WWE Payback?
ReplyDeleteGreat head of hair on Van Hammer. Surprised that wasn't enough to get him at least one main event run.
ReplyDeleteLots of stuff seemed to be trying too hard to be negative. I mean i agree it was the mother of "throwaway shows", but there was sure lots of focus on complaining on camera replays. And also, a heel womens champ who is actually booked super strong? Oh the humanity!!
ReplyDeleteMy girlfriend did a few years of walks for Komen. They make it so if you dont raise $30,000 for a group of 10, they would not let you walk. No matter what you raised and how hard you worked.
ReplyDeleteThey only do the walk in several cities now I think as they kept pulling out.
I also met the CEO at a charity event in Boston and to be kind, I will say she is an unpleasant person.
Usos has been pushed pretty damn strongly in the past 6 months, so I'd say they're above midcard right now. or at the very least, "upper midcard"
ReplyDeleteScripted era of WWE? So everything since around 1950 then?
ReplyDeleteI do like AJ.
ReplyDeleteAs do every sane person on the planet. Seriously, how can anyone not love her?
ReplyDeleteYou cheated on your poor wife when she had breast cancer AND committed election fraud. You have no moral authority on this blog sir.
ReplyDeleteBut, is John Kerry a muppet? Cause he totally looks like a muppet.
Which is 100% how it SHOULD be.
ReplyDeleteI had heard about the stuff with raising money for walks. I've only ever seen the CEO on TV. She didn't come off any better there.
ReplyDeleteThe fact that all the crap they do doesn't get them more bad publicity drives me crazy.
They raised less money in 2013 then the CEO gave herself a 56% raise.
ReplyDeleteShe basically ruined her own charity because of her greed
Except for the worst Rumble ever, and Cena/Orton stinking the joint out. Otherwise, absolutely.
ReplyDeleteI could've sworn the St. Valentine's Day Massacre PPV did a 1.2.
ReplyDeleteShe's great; Good worker, decent on the mic, can play both babyface and heel well, good merchandise, instantly recognizable music; she's got everything she needs. Also, she seems pretty cool outside of the ring, and is hotter than most of the other Divas without trying too hard.
ReplyDeleteThere IS a difference between "booking" and "scripting". The vast majority of today's guys would get chewed up by wrestlers from the Vince Sr. era.
ReplyDeleteKOTR 1999 did a 1.13 buyrate.
ReplyDeleteI desp is the koman foundation and their bullshit. Some great articles about thier scam
ReplyDeleteSee, I love that Rumble, because I enjoy watching plans spiral out of control. Same for the Cena/Orton match, I enjoy it on the same level as HHH/Steiner and Lesnar/Goldberg.
ReplyDeletePlus, Bryan/Wyatt was entertaining enough to make the rest of the evening pretty easy.
It's upsetting how many people know it's a scam now but they somehow get bigger every year!
ReplyDeleteBG next week seems to be a potential front runner for show of the year based on the card. What a 180 from last year, give or take 3 months.
ReplyDeleteThis one time i snorted meth and played Halo 3 with some people, it was awful, i never puked so much in my life.
ReplyDeleteI wish they would keep the names of the shows in order. For example, the PPV between MITB and Summerslam is likely to be more important than a throwaway one around October. So while they're both technically "Battleground", it's really totally different. "Sort of like Unforgiven being the post WM PPV for at least a year, then changing to September.
ReplyDeleteSurvivor Series 2013 was the first show I attended in person since Raw in 1998, and thanks to the Battleground booking I got Del Rio-Cena and Orton-Big Show main eventing. Just awful.
ReplyDeleteSVDM did a 1.21 while SBIX did a 1.14
ReplyDeleteEXACTLY
ReplyDeleteVader vs. Hogan comes to mind
ReplyDeletehe forgot to mention the facial hair. That's what made Goldberg a true ripoff
ReplyDeleteBut you wouldn't have known that if you quit watching.
ReplyDeleteDouble elimination tournaments are like parity booking. The whole point of a tournament is that someone comes out of it looking really strong and unbeatable. Windham and Hennig looked anything but.
ReplyDeleteI think the consensus on Hogan in WCW is that he basically did whatever he wanted.
ReplyDeleteWell they booked Hogan usually in the main event because he had his legacy to fall back on. No point in putting him in the opening match against Mike Enos.
ReplyDeleteExcept for Unforgiven EVERY 1999 WWF PPV drew a buyrate above 1.0, which is INSANE if you think about it.
ReplyDeleteYeah, especially when you consider how shitty most of the 1999 PPV's wound up being.
ReplyDeleteThe same holds true for Starrcade later on. If I remember it right.
ReplyDeleteAll from the same building.
1997 - 15,000
1998 - 16,000
1999 - 8,000
2000 - 4,000
Indeed, especially when we didn't even see them for about a week and a half before SuperBrawl.
ReplyDeleteDDP winning the world title when he did just felt......wrong. He wasn't as over as he was when he fought Goldberg at Halloween Havoc (where you could make the case that the streak should've ended after that Diamond Cutter counter of the Jackhammer setup) and his win just felt random. I remember flipping over to Nitro and was like "DDP has the world title? What the hell?" It was just a complete failure.
ReplyDeleteI actually liked the double elimination concept as it was unique, but the wrong team went over. I remember reading that Windham & Hennig won and thinking that WCW had lost their minds.
ReplyDeleteExactly. Friends have been trying to steer me towards Macs for years. I'm like, "I don't think you understand my budget."
ReplyDelete